Your Unmet Needs: The Real Reason You Can’t Stop Self-Sabotaging episode artwork

EPISODE · Mar 26, 2026 · 16 MIN

Your Unmet Needs: The Real Reason You Can’t Stop Self-Sabotaging

from This Is How You Think - Mindset Habits for Personal Growth · host Jule Kim, Executive Coach

Text Jule :)Unmet emotional needs are the invisible saboteurs behind some of our most frustrating patterns. I'm talking about the stuff where you know exactly what you need to change and you still can't do it. In this episode I'm getting into what unmet needs actually are, how they're different from values, and how they've been running my life in ways I didn't see for years. I share my own story of years of buying way too much stuff and filling up every room in my house, no matter how many times I tried to stop. I also walk through real examples from my clients and my own family to show you the two signs that a need is in the driver's seat.Topics covered:Why organizing and decluttering never worked for me, and what I was actually trying to solve forThe difference between needs and values, and why people mix them upTwo signs an unmet need is running things: behavior you can't stop, and emotional reactions that are way out of proportion to the situationHow unmet needs show up in sales calls, relationships, and everyday conflictWhy we lock onto one way to meet a need and act like it's the only optionCommon patterns I see in my clients: overworking, people-pleasing, emotional eating, and relationship conflictAn exercise to start figuring out your own unmet psychological needs (and when to do this with a therapist or coach, not alone)Want to read in-depth companion article to this episode?Send me a message on LinkedIn if you want to work on your unmet needs together.Support the showInterested in coaching with Jule?LinkedIn: @julekim / Instagram: @itsjulekim / TikTok: @itsjulekimJule’s website: https://adviceactually.com/Buy Jule’s Self-Love Affirmation Cards on AmazonWays to Support This Podcast:🌟 If this episode resonated with you, share it with someone who needs it—and please leave a review on Apple Podcasts or Spotify. Your support helps more people find the show.

Text Jule :) Unmet emotional needs are the invisible saboteurs behind some of our most frustrating patterns. I'm talking about the stuff where you know exactly what you need to change and you still can't do it. In this episode I'm getting into what unmet needs actually are, how they're different from values, and how they've been running my life in ways I didn't see for years. I share my own story of years of buying way too much stuff and filling up every room in my house, no...

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Your Unmet Needs: The Real Reason You Can’t Stop Self-Sabotaging

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This episode is 16 minutes long.

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This episode was published on March 26, 2026.

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Text Jule :)Unmet emotional needs are the invisible saboteurs behind some of our most frustrating patterns. I'm talking about the stuff where you know exactly what you need to change and you still can't do it. In this episode I'm getting into what...

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