A Song of Spice and Rhani

Spicer is off this week, so enjoy some commentary from yours truly as I watch Game of Thrones, Season 1, Spisode 1: Winter is Coming!

Daenerys makes us happy by kicking Jorah to the curb, Jaime meets with his shoulder angels (Cersei & Brienne), and Jon goes on a suicide mission north of the wall.Chapters discussed:Daenerys VIJaime IXJon XNext Week’s Chapters:Arya XIIISamwell IVJon XINew Episodes Out Every Tuesday!Cover art by JR ChambersMusic by Spicer Carr

Sansa listens to Littlefinger monologue at her, Jon gets a crappy reward for being a teen military commander, and Tyrion watches Oberyn take a tumble.Chapters discussed:Sansa VIJon IXTyrion XNext Week’s Chapters:Daenerys IVJaime IXJon XNew Episodes Out Every Tuesday!Cover art by JR ChambersMusic by Spicer Carr

Arya and the hound are on the road again, Tyrion sits through the dumbest trial of the century, and Jaime reprimands everybody after inviting them to his new apartment.Chapters discussed:Arya XIITyrion IXJaime VIIINext Week’s Chapters:Sansa VIJon IXTyrion XNew Episodes Out Every Tuesday!Cover art by JR ChambersMusic by Spicer Carr

Jaime and Cersei grieve in a unique way, Davos pisses off stannis with some smuggling, and Jon fights another battle while unwell.Chapters discussed:Jaime VIIDavos VIJon VIIINext Week’s Chapters:Arya XIITyrion IXJaime VIIINew Episodes Out Every Tuesday!Cover art by JR ChambersMusic by Spicer Carr

Sansa gets ready for Joffrey’s wedding while Tyrion whines, Tyrion gets to enjoy Joffrey’s death for all of two seconds, and Sansa escapes only to fall into the little grasp of Littlefinger.Chapters discussed:Sansa IVTyrion VIIISansa VNext Week’s Chapters:Jaime VIIDavos VIJon VIIINew Episodes Out Every Tuesday!Cover art by JR ChambersMusic by Spicer Carr

Bran hears some ghost stories and meets an unexpected fat guest, Daenerys finds out that men suck(again), and Tyrion sleeps with his child bride’s new maid.Chapters discussed:Bran IVDaenerys VTyrion VIINext Week’s Chapters:Sansa IVTyrion VIIISansa VNew Episodes Out Every Tuesday!Cover art by JR ChambersMusic by Spicer Carr

Tyrion and the Lannisters try to coparent a blood-thirsty Joffrey, Davos works on his reading skills, and Jon continues to be distracted by a pretty boy during the Battle of Castle Black.Chapters discussed:Tyrion VIDavos VJon VIINext Week’s Chapters:Bran IVDaenerys VTyrion VIINew Episodes Out Every Tuesday!Cover art by JR ChambersMusic by Spicer Carr

Catelyn arrives at the Red Wedding, Arya arrives at the Red Wedding, Catelyn loses all reason to live at the Red Wedding, Arya manages to survive the Red Wedding.Chapters discussed:Catelyn VIArya XCatelyn VIIArya XINext Week’s Chapters:Tyrion VIDavos VJon VIINew Episodes Out Every Tuesday!Cover art by JR ChambersMusic by Spicer Carr

Catelyn gets out in time out, Sam the Slayer strikes again, Arya tries to kill the Hound, and Jon finally makes it back to the wall.Chapters discussed:Catelyn VSamwell IIIArya IXJon VINext Week’s Chapters:Catelyn VIArya XCatelyn VIIArya XINew Episodes Out Every Tuesday!Cover art by JR ChambersMusic by Spicer Carr

Daenerys shows up all the dumb men around her, Arya takes an unexpected detour, and Jaime tells Brienne he dreamed of her.Chapters discussed:Daenerys IVArya VIIIJaime VINext Week’s Chapters:Daenerys IVArya VIIIJaime VINew Episodes Out Every Tuesday!Cover art by JR ChambersMusic by Spicer Carr

Arya continues to lose friends while getting more bloodthirsty, Bran casually commits a crime against humanity, and Jon breaks up with Ygritte over philosophical differences, aka, murder.Chapters discussed:Arya VIIBran IIIJon VNext Week’s Chapters:Daenerys IVArya VIIIJaime VINew Episodes Out Every Tuesday!Cover art by JR ChambersMusic by Spicer Carr

Davos finds out Stannis is Team Green, Jaime has the most vulnerable bath of his life, and Tyrion meets the most dangerous man in WesterosChapters discussed:Davos IVJaime VTyrion VNext Week’s Chapters:Arya VIIBran IIIJon VNew Episodes Out Every Monday!Cover art by JR ChambersMusic by Spicer Carr

Samwell attends the dinner party from Hell, Arya watches the Hound get traumatized by a zombie with a flaming sword, and Catelyn spirals with Robb after a funeral.Chapters discussed:Samwell IIArya VICatelyn IVNext Week’s Chapters:Davos IVJaime VTyrion VNew Episodes Out Every Monday!Cover art by JR ChambersMusic by Spicer Carr

Jon and Ygritte climb a wall, Jaime and Brienne survive the roadtrip from Hell, and Tyrion has lady/daddy/work troubles.Chapters discussed:Jon IVJaime IVTyrion IVNext Week’s Chapters:Samwell IIArya VICatelyn IVNew Episodes Out Every Monday!Cover art by JR ChambersMusic by Spicer Carr

Daenerys starts the fiery revolution we all need, Sansa gets surprised with the marriage of her nightmares, and Arya goes to a strange in with no food but lots of women.Chapters discussed:Daenerys IIISansa IIIArya VNext Week’s Chapters:Jon IVJaime IVTyrion IVNew Episodes Out Every Monday!Cover art by JR ChambersMusic by Spicer Carr

Bran gets the plot of the upcoming play Game of Thrones: The Mad King spoiled for him, Davos has philosophical disagreements with Melisandre, and Jon Snow enjoys spooky ghost stories and sex in caves.Chapters discussed:Bran IIDavos IIIJon IIINext Week’s Chapters:Daenerys IIISansa IIIArya VNew Episodes Out Every Monday!Cover art by JR ChambersMusic by Spicer Carr

Jaime struggles to understand how his privileged upbringing has helped him in a neurotypical world, Arya encounters some warm motherly love for the first time in god knows how long, and Daenerys travels to the most horrifying slave city in the world.Chapters discussed:Jaime IIIArya IVDaenerys IINext Week’s Chapters:Bran IIDavos IIIJon IIINew Episodes Out Every Monday!Cover art by JR ChambersMusic by Spicer Carr

Sam is fat and has to run from ice fairies, Tyrion meets a new conniving council who all hear wedding bells, and Catelyn watches Robb make another honorable but dumb decision.Chapters discussed:Samwell ITyrion IIICatelyn IIINext Week’s Chapters:Jaime IIIArya IVDaenerys IINew Episodes Out Every Monday!Cover art by JR ChambersMusic by Spicer Carr

Jon gets the sex talk from Tormund while Ygritte saves his life, Sansa gets a new dress for no apparent reason, and Arya loses a bestie.Chapters discussed:Jon IISansa IIArya IIINext Week’s Chapters:Samwell ITyrion IIICatelyn IIINew Episodes Out Every Monday!Cover art by JR ChambersMusic by Spicer Carr

Tyrion will not shut his mouth around Varys or his pants around Shae, Arya goes to an inn where she experiences a trauma response, and Catelyn gets emotionally manipulated by her son-king-boy.Chapters discussed:Tyrion IIArya IICatelyn IINext Week’s Chapters:Jon IISansa IIArya IIINew Episodes Out Every Monday!Cover art by JR ChambersMusic by Spicer Carr

Bran keeps getting distracted cosplaying as a wolf, Davos serves up some religiously flavored pirate realness, and Jaime deals with his trauma in a totally healthy way.Chapters discussed:Bran IJaime IIDavos IINext Week’s Chapters:Tyrion IIArya IICatelyn IINew Episodes Out Every Monday!Cover art by JR ChambersMusic by Spicer Carr

Sansa attends brunch with Lady Olenna Tyrell and Margaery Tyrell, Jon meets the most unassuming king in the world, and Daenerys is the pirate queen having to fight off creepy old men.Chapters discussed:Sansa IJon IDaenerys INext Week’s Chapters:Bran IJaime IIDavos IINew Episodes Out Every Monday!Cover art by JR ChambersMusic by Spicer Carr

Arya is back to some bloodthirsty camping, Tyrion finally gets out of bed, and Davos finds religion on a deserted island.Chapters discussed:Arya ITyrion IDavos INext Week’s Chapters:Sansa IJon IDaenerys INew Episodes Out Every Monday!Cover art by JR ChambersMusic by Spicer Carr

Chet somehow makes the border patrol look worse, Jaime is unserious, unbathed, and unimpressed… (except with Brienne… he’s quite impressed by her), and Catelyn gets grounded. Chapters discussed:PrologueJaime ICatelyn INext Week’s Chapters:Arya ITyrion IDavos INew Episodes Out Every Monday!Cover art by JR ChambersMusic by Spicer Carr

Dunk is done with princes, Egg wears the fanciest hat, and Maekar has to do some parenting.Episode 6: The MorrowNew Episodes Out Every Monday at 9pm PT!Cover art by JR ChambersMusic by Spicer Carr

Dunk gets stabbed (not by Lyonel Baratheon), Egg yells encouragement, and Baelor Targaryen has a whoops.Episode 5: In the Name of the MotherNew Episodes Out Every Monday at 9pm PT!Cover art by JR ChambersMusic by Spicer Carr

Dunk deals with a bunch of lying Targaryens, Egg cries, and the Baelor Targaryen has the best theme song.Episode 4: SevenNew Episodes Out Every Monday at 9pm PT!Cover art by JR ChambersMusic by Spicer Carr

Dunk saves the day, Egg shares his big secret, and the Aerion Brightflame preps for the new season of RuPaul’s Drag Race.Episode 3: The SquireNew Episodes Out Every Monday at 9pm PT!Cover art by JR ChambersMusic by Spicer Carr

Dunk works through his daddy issues, Egg has no patience for anyone, and the Baelor Breakspear is the only chill Targaryen.Episode 2: Hard Salt BeefNew Episodes Out Every Monday at 9pm PT!Cover art by JR ChambersMusic by Spicer Carr

A Knight of the Seven Kingdoms kicks off with Dunk the Lunk being as THICC as a castle wall, a tiny bald menace mouthing off, and Lyonel Baratheon performing a musical sequence.Episode 1: The Hedge KnightNew Episodes Out Every Monday at 9pm PT!Cover art by JR ChambersMusic by Spicer Carr

Tyrion has some traumatic hallucinations before seeing he has no nose, Jon has to traumatically murder a mentor, and Bran has to traumatically leave home. Chapters discussed:Tyrion XVJon VIIIBran VIINext Week’s Chapters:A Knight of the Seven Kingdoms,Episode 1New Episodes Out Every Monday!Cover art by JR ChambersMusic by Spicer Carr

Arya decides to Valar Morghulis out of Harrenhal, Sansa enjoys the breakup of her dreams, and Theon finds out what happens when you’re bad at making friends.Chapters Read:Arya XSansa VIIITheon VINext Week:Tyrion XVJon VIIIBran VIIMusic by Spicer CarrArtwork by JR Chambers

Tyrion leads the battle before he takes a tumble, Sansa deals with every drunk in King’s Landing, and Daenerys hightails it out of Qarth with a new gang. Chapters discussed:Tyrion XIVSansa VIIDaenerys VNext Week’s Chapters:Arya XSansa VIIITheon VINew Episodes Out Every Monday!Cover art by JR ChambersMusic by Spicer Carr

Davos is the only competent sailor at the battle, Tyrion does some light war crimes before giving a rousing halftime speech, and Sansa gets lessons in psychopathy from Cersei.Chapters discussed:Davos IIITyrion XIIISansa VINext Week’s Chapters:Tyrion XIVSansa VIIDaenerys VNew Episodes Out Every Monday!Cover art by JR ChambersMusic by Spicer Carr

Catelyn loses her religion and takes it out on Jaime Lannister, Theon discovers that crimes against humanity gives you nightmares, Sansa prays for Joffrey’s downfall.Chapters discussed:Catelyn VIITheon VSansa VNext Week’s Chapters:Davos IIITyrion XIIISansa VINew Episodes Out Every Monday!Cover art by JR ChambersMusic by Spicer Carr

Sansa tries to burn down her bedroom (with good reason), Jon learns he’s a magical boy, and Tyrion has the most uncomfortable family dinner with Cersei.Chapters discussed:Sansa IVJon VIITyrion XIINext Week’s Chapters:Catelyn VIITheon VSansa VNew Episodes Out Every Monday!Cover art by JR ChambersMusic by Spicer Carr

Tyrion is drowning in prep for the arrival of the Mannis, Theon can’t keep track of two elementary school kids and their pets, and Jon climbs a mountain before being forced to talk to a girl.Chapters discussed:Tyrion XITheon IVJon VINext Week’s Chapters:Sansa IVJon VIITyrion XIINew Episodes Out Every Monday!Cover art by JR ChambersMusic by Spicer Carr

Bran gets an unwelcome visit from Squidward and his motley crew, Arya stages a jalbreak and meets the new management, and Daenerys gets all the supernatural spoilers in the House of the Undying.Chapters discussed:Bran VIArya IXDaenerys IVNext Week’s Chapters:Tyrion XITheon IVJon VINew Episodes Out Every Monday!Cover art by JR ChambersMusic by Spicer Carr

Jon Snow gets the job offer of his dreams, Tyrion can’t tell that she’s just not into him, and Catelyn can’t help but feel that the vibes are off.Chapters discussed:Jon VTyrion XCatelyn VINext Week’s Chapters:Bran VIArya IXDaenerys IVNew Episodes Out Every Monday!Cover art by JR ChambersMusic by Spicer Carr

Daenerys learns that rich people aren’t interested in funding regime change in Westeros, Tyrion finds out what not to do in a riot, and Davos takes the boat ride from hell with our resident spooky pregnant priestess.Chapters discussed:Daenerys IIITyrion IXDavos IINext Week’s Chapters:Jon VTyrion XCatelyn VINew Episodes Out Every Monday!Cover art by JR ChambersMusic by Spicer Carr

Theon has second thoughts about committing war crimes, Arya realizes she hasn’t used her murder genie in a smart way, and Catelyn continues to get bad news.Chapters discussed:Theon IIIArya VIIICatelyn VNext Week’s Chapters:Daenerys IIITyrion IXDavos IINew Episodes Out Every Monday!Cover art by JR ChambersMusic by Spicer Carr

Jon Snow arrives at an ancient fort that’s totally not haunted, Bran continually receives terrible news via prophetic frog boy dreams, and Tyrion gets the heebie jeebies when Cersei is nice to him. Chapters discussed:Jon IVBran VTyrion VIIINext Week’s Chapters:Theon IIIArya VIIICatelyn VNew Episodes Out Every Monday!Cover art by JR ChambersMusic by Spicer Carr

Catelyn deals with Baratheon sibling rivalries, Sansa learns that knights all suck, and Catelyn skedaddles with Brienne after witnessing a magic murder.Chapters discussed:Catelyn IIISansa IIICatelyn IVNext Week’s Chapters:Jon IVBran VTyrion VIIINew Episodes Out Every Monday!Cover art by JR ChambersMusic by Spicer Carr

*There are some audio issue with Rhani’s mic for the first section, I promise it’s fixed after the first break.Bran struggles with anger management while making friends with Jojen and Meera, Tyrion blackmails his cousin for funsies, and Arya discovers the benefits of murder.Chapters discussed:Bran IVTyrion VIIArya VIINext Week’s Chapters:Catelyn IIISansa IIICatelyn IVNew Episodes Out Every Monday!Cover art by JR ChambersMusic by Spicer Carr

Tyrion poisons Cersei & gives Pycelle a shave, Arya arrives at the spookiest castle in Westeros, and Daenerys gets the best news of her life.Chapters discussed:Tyrion VIArya VIDaenerys IINext Week’s Chapters:Bran IVTyrion VIIArya VIINew Episodes Out Every Monday!Cover art by JR ChambersMusic by Spicer Carr

Catelyn is forced to go to brunch with Renly Baratheon, Jon meets the worst father in all of Westeros, and Theon needs therapy after meeting his sister Asha.Chapters discussed:Catelyn IIJon IIITheon IINext Week’s Chapters:Tyrion VIArya VIDaenerys IINew Episodes Out Every Monday!Cover art by JR ChambersMusic by Spicer Carr

Arya & Gendry are captured by war criminals, Tyrion meets the crypt keeper, and Bran attends a feast with some weird swamp siblings.Chapters discussed:Arya VTyrion VBran IIINext Week’s Chapters:Catelyn IIJon IIITheon IINew Episodes Out Every Monday!Cover art by JR ChambersMusic by Spicer Carr

Bran meets the entire cast of characters in the North, Tyrion manipulates everyone in the Red Keep, and Sansa meets her disappointing knight in shining armor.Chapters discussed:Bran IITyrion IVSansa IINext Week’s Chapters:Arya VTyrion VBran IIINew Episodes Out Every Monday!Cover art by JR ChambersMusic by Spicer Carr

*There were some issues with my mic this week, I apologize if it’s ever a nuisance.Jon checks in to show us an ooky spooky tree, Team Arya becomes the subject of the war crimes, and Tyrion has a busy day of manipulative meetings.Chapters discussed:Jon IIArya IVTyrion IIINext Week’s Chapters:Bran IITyrion IVSansa IINew Episodes Out Every Monday!Cover art by JR ChambersMusic by Spicer Carr