PODCAST · comedy
Beardless, D*ckless Me
by Kevin Smith, Harley Quinn Smith
For 25 years, Kevin Smith has tried to make his beardless, dickless twin of a daughter Harley laugh in real life. Now he does it every week on a podcast.
-
53
Beardless, Dickless Finale
Harley and Kevin wrap up Beardless, Dickless Me LIVE at Smodcastle Cinemas in Atlantic Highlands, NJ on Sunday, August 3, 2025. PLUS: BACK TO THE ABATTOIR!
-
52
The True Beginning of the End
Harley and Kevin perform Beardless, Dickless Me LIVE at Smodcastle Cinemas in Atlantic Highlands, NJ on Sunday, August 3, 2025. PLUS: GIVE ME BACK MY NAME!
-
51
The Final Home Show
Kevin learns of a familial connection to a serial killer and Harley has a stray cat story. PLUS: Biting Bill!See omnystudio.com/listener for privacy information.
-
50
This Could Be a Party on My Behalf
Kevin visits Momily and Harley gets a surprise! PLUS: It's the last studio show! See you LIVE in NJ!See omnystudio.com/listener for privacy information.
-
49
It’s A Good Title, Right?
Harley is dealing with Unstoppa-Bill and Kevin has a comic book drop today. PLUS: Kevin’s Favorite Ride and only two more to go!See omnystudio.com/listener for privacy information.
-
48
“The World’s Most Punchable Face”
Kevin is accused of Seuss-ian rhymes and Harley talks trends and Labubu. PLUS: A live show update!See omnystudio.com/listener for privacy information.
-
47
iHeartattack Part 1
The beginning of the end. Kevin talks about Cannes, Harley talks about Spain, and both talk about the end of BDM as we know it.See omnystudio.com/listener for privacy information.
-
46
The Biblical Avengers
Kevin and Harley discuss Dogma and how art can be impactful.See omnystudio.com/listener for privacy information.
-
45
Deardless, Bickless Me
Harley and Bill have their first Easter and Kevin’s in the Jay Ward. PLUS: Kevin’s still touring, dogmamovie.com!See omnystudio.com/listener for privacy information.
-
44
Mr Steak Hand Puppet
Kevin wins Mr. Steak and Harley gets it Fresco style. PLUS: Kevin is still on the Dogma Resurrection tour. See it with him! dogmamovie.comSee omnystudio.com/listener for privacy information.
-
43
Egg-istential Questions
Kevin and Harley learn to pronounce words and answer questions from listeners.See omnystudio.com/listener for privacy information.
-
42
Why Won’t Anyone Help Them?!
Before Kevin goes on the Dogma tour, Harley has questions… about the 90’s. Plus: Harley has to sell some shirts!See omnystudio.com/listener for privacy information.
-
41
Prisoner of The Planet of the Apes
Kevin recounts an entire film franchise. Harley longs to live in an Epic Universe. Plus: The Conclusion of the eBay Epic.See omnystudio.com/listener for privacy information.
-
40
The Resurrection of Dogma
Kevin talks about the surprise sudden re-release of Dogma! Harley records a voice track for a cartoon! Plus: The Devil Went Down to Georgia.See omnystudio.com/listener for privacy information.
-
39
Harley Quinngaged!
Kevin has big, life-changing news! Harley has a normal, unexceptional weekend! Plus: Dixon the Cuck Cow!See omnystudio.com/listener for privacy information.
-
38
His name… is Milton Hersey
Harley’s making music! Kevin’s snatching victory from the jaws of eBay defeat! Plus: Kev gets existential.See omnystudio.com/listener for privacy information.
-
37
eBay’s Bitch
Kevin can’t stop shopping eBay! Harley conducts a quiz! Plus: Tales of Facebook Marketplace Meet-Ups!See omnystudio.com/listener for privacy information.
-
36
Coo d’etat
Harley drops her single and Kevin brings the Bible to life! Plus: The show falls into a Pigeon hole.See omnystudio.com/listener for privacy information.
-
35
Crab Walker
Harley has a hypothetical for her Father as she takes over the show. Kevin teases details of his next film. Plus: Beardless, Dickless Live?See omnystudio.com/listener for privacy information.
-
34
Beardless Beyond
Kevin talks about the Aural Sects Tour and Harley builds the 50th Episode live show in real time. Plus: Rocky and Bullwinkle!See omnystudio.com/listener for privacy information.
-
33
Kev Miner's Daughter
Harley has questions. Kevin visits another podcast. Plus: Harley's band gets closer to a name. See omnystudio.com/listener for privacy information.
-
32
Department Store
Kevin tries to create some structure. Harley dodges hypotheticals. Plus: A Bad Hair Day!See omnystudio.com/listener for privacy information.
-
31
Shirt Tales
Harley becomes a clothing magnate. Kevin writes comic books. Plus: The return of Vegan Abattoir!See omnystudio.com/listener for privacy information.
-
30
Kids in the Hallmark
Kevin and Harley recap the Wicked singalong before diving deeply into ancient inscriptions on greeting cards. Plus: A Hump Bunny No More!See omnystudio.com/listener for privacy information.
-
29
After the Fire
Kevin and Harley tell tales of running from the Los Angeles fires. Plus: Bad Bunny Billy’s gotta have it!See omnystudio.com/listener for privacy information.
-
28
Cthulu Bunny
Kevin has a Point Nemo nightmare. Harley gives Kevin a calendar. Plus: Billy Begins!See omnystudio.com/listener for privacy information.
-
27
Hey Apple!
Harley and Kevin start the new year with a deep dive about creepy internet videos and pageant work. Plus: Passion or Ration returns!See omnystudio.com/listener for privacy information.
-
26
Boxing Day
Kevin and Harley celebrate BDM’s first Christmas and the end of the year. Plus: Peanuts on Ice!See omnystudio.com/listener for privacy information.
-
25
Drone Alone
Harley makes music and Kevin makes a sitcom. Plus: Ring Cams of the Damned!See omnystudio.com/listener for privacy information.
-
24
Cin City
Kevin and Hartley say goodbye to the best bunny that wasn't Bugs.See omnystudio.com/listener for privacy information.
-
23
Beardsgiving
Kevin and Harley gather together to ask the Lord’s blessing. Plus: Making the official BDM T-shirt!See omnystudio.com/listener for privacy information.
-
22
With a Song in my Heart
Kevin and Harley have a listening party! Plus: The return of passion or ration!See omnystudio.com/listener for privacy information.
-
21
Captain Stupid
Harley goes to Disneyland for free in exchange for cleaning the bathroom, and Kevin comes clean about Tony. Plus: The Return of Passion or Ration!See omnystudio.com/listener for privacy information.
-
20
Rest in Paw-er
Kevin and Harley say goodbye to Momily's 21-year-old cat. Plus: singing!See omnystudio.com/listener for privacy information.
-
19
Mr. Potato Hat
Celebrate Halloween with a couple of hollow wieners as Kevin and Harley trick and treat you to terrifying tales! Plus: Oo, la la, Zajur!See omnystudio.com/listener for privacy information.
-
18
We Never Smiled in the 90’s
Kevin shows Harley a short film that makes her cry. Harley has to give steroids to the Moo Man. Plus: The first female detective in the Newark PD!See omnystudio.com/listener for privacy information.
-
17
For the Love of Benji
Kevin tells the tale of Lucky’s short king suitor. And Harley discovers the Dad she never knew. Plus: Wucky gets waid!See omnystudio.com/listener for privacy information.
-
16
Be Not Afraid
Kevin tells Harley about the rat incident and sings the Laverne & Shirley theme song. Plus: Father Dave’s Funeral Hits!See omnystudio.com/listener for privacy information.
-
15
The Sin-Eaters
Kevin helps Harley cover up an accidental crime. Plus: A cat in a backpack!See omnystudio.com/listener for privacy information.
-
14
Blood is Thicker Than Water
Kevin and Harley talk Smith family history and bring the dogs to the beach.See omnystudio.com/listener for privacy information.
-
13
The Long Halloween
Kevin and Harley cavort through the calendar and Passion or Ration all of the holidays. Plus: Harley’s selling her clothes!See omnystudio.com/listener for privacy information.
-
12
The 4:30 Movie is Now in Theaters!
Harley passes on a leading role in Kevin’s new movie. A Dad and Daughter discuss Mental Health. And the debut of Passion or Ration.See omnystudio.com/listener for privacy information.
-
11
About, Above, Across
Kevin tells Harley about a dead Hollywood man who became a live Oklahoma boy. Matriarch Momily can still recite her prepositions.See omnystudio.com/listener for privacy information.
-
10
“In a time when a woman could only be a man…”
Kevin and Harley try to write either a one hour drama for the Christian Broadcasting Network or a half hour sitcom for Netflix.See omnystudio.com/listener for privacy information.
-
9
Cookie Puss
Harley’s taste test triggers a Disney deep-dive. Plus: Matriarch Momily’s Marijuana Midnight Madness!See omnystudio.com/listener for privacy information.
-
8
“GIVE ME BACK MY NAME, WOMAN!”
Kevin and Harley are in hot pursuit of the Trivial 90’s. And John Proctor climbs out of his crucible.See omnystudio.com/listener for privacy information.
-
7
Embouchure
Harley gets caught in a mosh and Kevin has a Dad-level existential crisis. Harley goes geeky for a Disney Vlogger while Kevin tries to come up with a name for the band.See omnystudio.com/listener for privacy information.
-
6
Tom Waits for No Man
Harley gets a haircut and the internet has thoughts. Kevin becomes the King of the Elves while Harley won’t kill an undead Austin. Plus: a REAL review of Jen’s stew.See omnystudio.com/listener for privacy information.
-
5
You Can Count on Momily
Matriarch Momily gets her heart re-started. Kevin reveals talk show secrets. Harley is haunted by the Bermuda Triangle and agog over Satan’s secret origin. Plus: The Infant of Prague vs The Children of Fatima!See omnystudio.com/listener for privacy information.
-
4
We Are, All of Us, Lucky
Lucky chases balls like Harley and Kevin chase relevancy. Harley is obsessed with the Disney vlogging community. Would You Work as a Face Character at the Magic Kingdom? And voicing Harley Quinn’s kitties for fun and profit!.See omnystudio.com/listener for privacy information.
We're indexing this podcast's transcripts for the first time — this can take a minute or two. We'll show results as soon as they're ready.
No matches for "" in this podcast's transcripts.
No topics indexed yet for this podcast.
Loading reviews...
Loading similar podcasts...