Bride of the Creature

Landini… Next time on Bride of the Creature: GRIZZLY! It’s like JAWS only it’s a BEAR!!!

The little gray cells… Next time on Bride of the Creature: There’s this girl and she knows too much. AND SO CAN YOU! Mario Bava’s proto-giallo “The Girl Who Knew Too Much”

You’ve arrived on a rather… special night… it’s one of the master’s affairs… Next time on Bride of the Creature: The time has come to exercise our little grey cells with the help of the greatest detective in the world: Hercule Poirot! It’s Kenneth Branagh’s “A Haunting in Venice”

Bilbo should have killed that creature when he had the chance… Next time on Bride of the Creature: We’re inverting the last two digits of the release year of this movie with the Universal Horror classic “The Old Dark House” from 1932.

It’s time for an Occurance at Owl Creek Podcast. Next time on Bride of the Creature: GHOULS ON A BOAT. It’s Andre Ovredal’s 2023 bloodsucker “The Last Voyage of the Demeter”

God that’s… not good. Next time on Bride of the Creature: Life is a Carnival. It’s Carnival of Souls from 1962

I wish they were werewolves… Next time on Bride of the Creature: Attend the tale of Sweeney Todd… His skin was pale and his eye was odd…

Look upon me. I will show you the life of the mind. Next time on Bride of the Creature: someBODY once TOLD me the BEACH was gonna OLD me…

RIch people are crazy… Next time on Bride of the Creature: It’s been AGES since Joey picked some Japanese movie. So he did. Takashi Miike’s: “The Happiness of the Katakuris!”

Roses Are RedThis Movie is DryGo Get a Big KnifeRight Into Your Eye   Next time on Bride of the Creature: Nicole claims Joey manipulated her into picking Skinamarink. This is NONSENSE, but in the interest of a happy home, she’s picking again. It’s Brandon Cronenberg’s latest: INFINITY POOL

We watched this movie back in September?… but we managed to find some fun stuff to talk about anyway. Welcome back.   Next time on Bride of the Creature: Nicole chose some experimental, indie, avant-garde stuff. You know like NORMAL. See you next time when we watch SKINAMARINK

The feed has been taken over by tiny anarchist goblins! Please enjoy your first visit… to Spooky Town.   Next time on Bride of the Creature: Joey really has selected Bob Balaban’s 1993 horror-comedy “My Boyfriends Back” and you’re gonna be in trouble. They have watched the movie! They’re only 3 months late! LIFE HAPPENS,...

This month we’re watching the legendary British television cult classic GHOSTWATCH and also discussing the approximate number of people who are dummies.   Next time on Bride of the Creature: Joey has selected Bob Balaban’s 1993 horror-comedy “My Boyfriends Back” and you’re gonna be in trouble.

Like a phoenix from the ashes, we have returned. After an unscheduled hiatus (we looked all over the damn house for my beautiful KINO special edition blu ray of this film… it’s the one with the awesome Sean Phillips cover art) we’re back to discuss this wonderful TV movie from 1973, and a whole lot...

I’ll tell you what I’m going to do with these pies, man! I’m gonna invite you and all your friends over for a pie party! It’s gonna be a really great way to buoy the spirits of the community and bring us closer together!   Next time on Bride of the Creature: If you thought...

Easily in the top 3 werewolf movies that reference Mr. Rogers.   Next time on Bride of the Creature: What ARE you going to do with those pies, boys? It’s KILLER KLOWNS FROM OUTER SPACE!

We’re gonna get 1,000,000 downloads of this episode… because… it’s HAUNTED* *not actually Haunted Next time on Bride of the Creature: WEREWOLVES WITHIN!

This wasn’t the movie I meant to pick… Still, how ’bout that Umbrella guy?   Join us next month for Nicole’s pick:

Welcome back to The Bride’s House of Waxing Intellectual. Join me for the third and final installment of our Amityville Horror deep dive. A big thank-you goes out to Joey Gruszecki for editing and production, Rob Gruszecki for composing, performing and recording the theme song and Alex Lueng for photography.  A list of research references:...

Welcome back to Part 2 of The Bride’s House of Waxing Intellectual. Where we continue our analysis of the Amityville Horror. Part 2 explores the cultural context of the book, the 1979 movie and movie review. A big thank-you goes out to Joey Gruszecki for editing and production, Rob Gruszecki for composing the theme song...

‘Twas the night before Christmasand like in the bastJoey scrambled to post upthe newest podcast… Merry Happy from Bride of the Creature! Join us in January when Joey is back on his bullshit again and we watch YOKAI MONSTERS: 100 MONSTERS

Bride of the Creature presents The Bride’s House of Waxing Intellectual. The podcast that dives deep into a horror novel and the move/movies that are based on it. Our first series explores Jay Anson’s 1977 novel The Amityville Horror, the 1979 film and the 2005 remake.  A big thank-you goes out to Joey Gruszecki for...

State your first name, last name and occupation Panther Woman. Panther Woman and…. uh… Panther Woman Candyman? More like… MAN CANDY! AMIRITE?!!

Candyman? More like… MAN CANDY! AMIRITE?!! Next time on Bride of the Creature: Less Candymans more Beastmans. ISLAND OF LOST SOULS!!!

Werewolves, wait, hear me out… with bats! Next month it’s a Spooktober VS Double-Header as we watch the 1992 original CANDYMAN and it’s newfangled reboot/remake from the current year of our lord 2021. We’re even going to read the Clive Barker short story that is the basis. See you then!

We bring you the gift of the gift. It’s a gift (starring WC Fields). Next time on Bride of the Creature: We are going on summer vacation! We’re moving house and that’s a lot of work so there will be no July or August episodes! Enjoy your vaxxed ‘n’ waxxed hot boi summers and join...

Stop motion? More like… stop SLEEPIN’! amirite? (sorry.) Next time on Bride of the Creature: Nicole has selected Sam Raimi’s last film before disappearing into superhero and franchise hell (minus a quick nostalgia trip post Spiderman 3), 2000’s “The Gift”

How come “Bad City, Iran” looks so much like southern California?At the end of this episode Joey rambles about the song “L’arena” by Ennio Morricone (it’s great), he mistakenly claims it is from a movie called “The Arena”. He does this because he’s an idiot and as soon as recording was complete he remembered the...

It’s your birrrrrrrrrthday and we want you to have fun. We’ll be back in a month with less robot killin’ and more Iranian Vampires with “A Girl Walks Home Alone At Night”

Take a break from all the video conferencing you’ve had to do in lockdown and… watch these people do some. Be sure to join us next month to watch a stoic Nicholas Cage kill what resemble but are legally distinct from the Five Nights at Freddy’s monsters (who resemble, but are legally distinct from Chuck-E-Cheese)

Mark Dacascos is many things… apparently including an Iroquois warrior? Next time on Bride of the Creature:Because we haven’t spent enough time on Zoom in the last year… it’s HOST! That seance movie shot on Zoom! Yay?

There’s nothing scarier than filthy, british orphans. Next time on Bride of the Creature:Brotherhood of the Wolf. Write your own funny joke or commentary here, I’m tired.

Damn, Japan… YOU SCARY! Next time on Bride of the Creature:It’s beginning to look a lot like Grand Dame Guignol! Join us as we ask the immortal question: Who Slew Auntie Roo?

There’s eyes in them thar hills! Next time on Bride of the Creature:Joey’s back on his bullshit and we travel to Japan yet again for a look at the 2005 found-footage/pseudo-documentary NOROI: THE CURSE

The dog made a cat noise and then farted! It’s the most wonderful time of the year! We’ll be back next month and to celebrate our favorite time we’ll be doing another VERSUS! Who will win the showdown between Wes Craven’s original and someone else’s remake of THE HILLS HAVE EYES? (probably Craven).

Editorial cartoonists make the best detectives. I’ve always said this. This month we break off a fresh hundo with Nicole’s selection of David Fincher’s 2007 masterpiece ZODIAC. Editorial cartoonists make the best detectives. I’ve always said this. This month we break off a fresh hundo with Nicole’s selection of David Fincher’s 2007 masterpiece ZODIAC. Editorial...

WE HAVE SUCH SIGHTS TO SHOW YOU!!!It’s the 100th episode and Joey finally gets his chance to subject Nicole to his favorite horror franchise (at least the first 4 installments). It’s Clive Barker’s HELLRAISER Next time on Bride of the Creature:We break off another hundo and Nicole starts this one out with her pick of:...

Greetings, Boils and Ghouls! eeeeehehheehehehehehehehehe! This month George Romero and Stephen King pay tribute to the horror comics of the 1950s with their anthology horror compilation CREEPSHOW Next time on Bride of the Creature:Our 100th episode Spooktacular. To celebrate, we’ll be watching the first FOUR Hellraiser films! We have such SIGHTS TO SHOW YOU.

Nicole is still reeling from the Tokoloshe and is a little squirrelly this episode. Joey selected Hideo Nakata’s J-horror masterpiece DARK WATER The countdown to episode 100 continues next month with Nicole’s selection of George Romero & Stephen King’s CLASSIC EC Horror Comics tribute CREEPSHOW.

Don’t blame me, Nicole picked this one. It’s supposed to be South African folklore. Will it deliver? or will we get cliche, half-baked, non-sensical Silent Hill ripoff? Listen and find out! (It’s the second one. This movie sucks) Everyone can relax. Joey is once again steering this ship… and because he’s a predictable, weebo loser...

Joey finally finds an excuse to go on about Werner Herzog as we watch his 1979 Nosferatu remake. Nicole has chosen Jerome Pikwane’s “THE TOKOLOSHE” from 2018 for the next episode.

It’s the return of the son of. Brodie is back to review Goosebumps 2

B-B-B-B-B-BONUS-S-S-S-S-S EP. 1970s British TV Folk Horror. DIG IT Reminder: For the regular march, Joey has chosen a Werner Herzog movie because of course he has. NOSFERATU, THE VAMPYRE from 1979

A classic Sci Fi mystery and one of the greatest body horror films of all time go head to head as we contrast and compare both versions of THE FLY For March, Joey has chosen a Werner Herzog movie because of course he has. NOSFERATU, THE VAMPYRE from 1979

This month Joey chooses the 100th feature film of Takashi Miike; “Blade of the Immortal” and bloodworms and bodycounts are discussed. Incidentally, “Bloodworms and Bodycounts” is the name of my Cradle of Filth cover band. Next time Nicole has decided that it would be a good idea to dust off the VERSUS format for the...

Once again an audible was called for… reasons. We get into in the episode, but we ended up watching Jim Jarmusch’s laconic zom-com “The Dead Don’t Die”. It’s about zombies… you know, “ghouls”… the undead. Next time Joey is back on his weebo bullshit and we’re watching another japanese movie. Blade of the Immortal!

Look. I know we were supposed to be watching Doctor Sleep this month, but it’s not easy to get to the theatre. Things happen… things BURN. Anyway, when it became apparent we weren’t going to have a chance to see Doctor Sleep an audible was called and Joey picked Teruo Ishii’s 1969 film “The Horrors...

Happy Halloween! We’re joined by a (sort-of) returning guest for a quick Halloween bonus episode looking at his current favorite movie.

What’s your favorite Scary-Funny-Meta-Eventually-Bad Movie Franchise? Next time on Bride of the Creature: Date Night! The Bride and Creature are leaving their lair to take in a picture show. We’re going to be watching MIke Flanagan’s new Stephen King adaptation “Doctor Sleep!”

Never move into a spooky old house! I mean, come on! Next time on Bride of the Creature: It’s the most wonderful tiiiiiiiiiiiime of the year. To celebrate the best month of the year we want you to SCREAM and SCREAM AGAIN and then SCREAM FOR A THIRD TIME and then even though it’s pretty...