But Make It Hallmark
by Chinggay and Patty
Movie reviews… but make it Hallmark. Fangirls Chinggay and Patty flex their film rating muscles as they work their way through the Hallmark Cinematic Universe. All bets are off as they judge movie meet cutes, almost kisses, and fawn over their onscreen and offscreen HCU faves
Episodes
-
Our Saddest Christmas Yet + the BMIH Top 8
… a depressing Countdown to Christmas Chinggay and Patty do a speed round of the last few weeks of Countdown to Christmas—spoiler alert, none of the movies were hits and some of them were depressing downers (we see you, Oy to the World!). In order to save time, we go straight into our Top 8...
-
A Grand Ole Holiday Win
… was there ever any doubt we’d love a Polaha movie? Chinggay and Patty get a little bit of everything—naughty/bad movies, standard/mid manicure movies, and Hallmark hall of famers. There were more veterans than usual this Thanksgiving week (Rachel, Nikki, Autumn, Erin, Niall, Brendan, Paul…
more -
Christmas is on
… we’re back from our hiatus Chinggay and Patty are in town again to revive their favorite Christmas tradition—watching and ranking all the movies. The first nine of 2026 are a hodgepodge of mostly nice list flicks with very few naughties and misses. It’s good to see the usual suspects back on...
-
Royal Tea
… who’s taking the crown? Chinggay and Patty are finally in the same city to record the pod and talk Hallmark royalty. It was slim picking for March with only three royal movies. Spoiler alert: none of them were bad, but BMIH faves Andrew Walker and Mallory Jepsen reigned supreme this season.…
more -
We Love Love(uary)
… giddy all through February Chinggay and Patty dive into the month of love with a lineup that was full of twists. Our tried and true regulars unexpectedly lost their usual #1 spot (sorry Lacey and Robert), but it was a three-way tie for the top for RLC, SMF, Janel Parrish, and past fave actors...
-
Horses and Diamonds are a Girl’s Best Friends
… a happy Hallmark New Year to all! Chinggay and Patty start the 6th (!) season of the pod with two movies that were “good enough” and two movies that were pitch perfect. The true winners this month are the comeback kids—Laci and Julie, and David Elsendoorn and JPDP, Juan Pablo di Pace. Belgium…
more -
Hallmark Christmas Wrapped, 2024
… our top 12 tradition is back Chinggay and Patty continue the annual tradition of ranking the best Countdown to Christmas and Miracles of Christmas movies of the year. 2024 was the year of the Nice List and the year of the Dan Jeannotte Redemption Award. We loved so many offerings this year that...
-
The Finish Line
… after 10 weeks, we’ve made it through all the movies Chinggay and Patty, gluttons of punishment that they are, participate in Hallmark+’s Cherry Lane trilogy and wildly regret it. They finish the season with one last Countdown to Christmas movie with newfound empathy for Jessica Lowndes, and…
more -
Top of the Santa Class
… in which Dan Jeannotte does not receive the Dan Jeannotte Redemption Award Chinggay and Patty didn’t think this week would fare well since multiple recipients of the K in our F*** Marry Kill segment showed up as lead actors. However, Dan Jeannotte, Brooke d’Orsay, and...
-
Give Us More Sugarplum!
… ‘‘twas a week of no naughties Chinggay and Patty are flummoxed at how post-Thanksgiving week has had 4/4 movies on the BMIH Nice List. There’s a little bit of everything—neurodivergence with endearing kids, royal ridiculousness that we actually loved, plus Patty has yet another one-sided…
more -
Touchdown of All Touchdowns
… we survived Thanksgiving Week, Hallmark-style Chinggay and Patty live out the true Christmas miracle—watching all eight movies from Thanksgiving week. We got it all this week—a few awful ones that no one should watch (or rewatch), some middle of the road movies with people we love (s/o to Wes...
-
Kimberly Sustad, you are a genius
… and just like that, we’re back on the naughty list Chinggay and Patty hate on half the movies that came out this week, but are fully in love and committed to #MIraclesOfChristmas “A Novel Noel” and #CountdownToChristmas “Three Wiser Men and a Boy.” Skip the below-average hospital movie and the...
-
Welcome to Our Non-Sister Wives Lives
… it’s another Hallmark homerun this week Chinggay and Patty are in utter disbelief because all four movies on Week Five of #CountdownToChristmas and #MiraclesOfChristmas are worth everyone’s time. We’re celebrating excellent ensemble casts in all the movies, a unique anti-hero, fun and...
-
We Loved All Of Them
… Hallmark, you sneaky little minx Chinggay and Patty are floored. Every one of Week Four’s movies was worth watching; and an entire ensemble cast receives the Dan Jeanotte Redemption Award for proving us that first impressions can be changed given a good script and good direction. Here we…
more -
Mismatch and Mayhem
… take a shot every time we ask, “What are we doing, Hallmark?” Chinggay and Patty share a mild case of anger towards Hallmark for continuing to push its musical agenda with the wrong people and for hard-selling A-listers but giving us Z-list plots. Props to Warren Christie for coming out of the...
-
Live, Laugh, Lean In
Chinggay and Patty soldier through three duds and end with a rewarding 10/10 movie directed by Corey Sevier, newest inductee to the But Make It Hallmark Hall of Fame. We walk you through problematic casting, perfect pairs with imperfect plots, and actors we love who give us a bad case of…
more -
We’re Just Warming Up
Chinggay and Patty end their hiatus with the first week of Countdown to Christmas. Chris McNally loses his WCTH glow, while Carlo Marks climbs the ranks thanks to his earnestness. A kid cancels out our tendency to hate on one of Hallmark’s staple actresses. And Robert Buckley tops the week’s Nice...
-
Passport to Love
Chinggay and Patty are swept away by the month’s travel-themed movies. Andrew Walker bares his arms under the Malta sun. Italy and Greece go head to head in two very samesy movies with two equally stellar European leading men. As per usual, rom com queen BJL steals our hearts (and makes us want…
more -
Don’t Even Bother
Chinggay and Patty are at an all-time low because Hallmark’s Countdown to Summer movies literally put them both to sleep. BMIH’s shortest episode yet goes through this snoozefest, one movie at a time—so you don’t have to. Our silver lining? Andrea Brooks and the return of BMIH’s favorite kid…
more -
A Charming Laugh Works Wonders
Chinggay and Patty throw the gauntlet with super serious Spring Into Love pronouncements. One, bobs are making a comeback thanks to Aimee Teegarden and Erin Krakow. Two, Dan Jeanotte is officially out of Patty’s doghouse. And three, Chinggay declares Sarah Drew to be the HCU’s very own Meryl...
-
Love is Blind
Chinggay and Patty fixate on their current Hallmark kinks: Patagonia sad dads and crumbs from a kind friend-to-lover. This week’s movies fall under No Man’s Land season, where random themes reign supreme — female empowerment care of fighter pilot moms and car mechanic daughters. Two favourite...
-
But Make It Austen
Chinggay and Patty get loud, proud, and prejudiced because it’s Austen month on the Hallmark Channel! It is a truth universally acknowledged that when certain actors who BMIH has deemed disgraced come on-screen, you get a pod filled with intense rage. On the opposite end of the spectrum, this...
-
Hallmark Olympics 2024
Chinggay and Patty actually get through New Year New Movies without a hitch! The year started with a slew of sports offset by Hallmark’s usual tropes. Rugby + fascination with a foreign land, golf + dead moms, aerial silks + small town festival. The one movie that managed to steer clear of any...
-
Hallmark Christmas Wrapped, 2023
Chinggay and Patty share their Top 12 movies from this year’s Countdown to Christmas and Miracles of Christmas season. This year, we get fans, family, and friends to share their thoughts on our top picks; and rank our best holiday movies from across the years. It’s been a rollercoaster of a...
-
It's Hell Down Here
Chinggay and Patty throw well-deserved shade at nearly every movie this week and unwillingly come up with a nice movie amidst a sea of naughty ones (the bar was on the floor for the end of Countdown to Christmas). That said, we celebrate our lezzie queens and admit that all we want for Christmas…
more -
Hanukkah’s on Fire
Chinggay and Patty just cannot with Hallmark’s attempt at making a “This is Us” movie; plus Paul Campbell and Kimberly Sustad come to the screens but in separate movies, and it breaks our hearts a little. We celebrate Sam Page’s return to the channel (with Rachael Leigh Cook as an added bonus).…
more -
Will Kemp Heals All
Chinggay and Patty trudge through another round of mediocre movies saved by one gem and one gem alone. There’s the yearly call to arms protesting the Time For x Miracles of Christmas movies, and an unfortunately messy Mahogany movie with what would have been a promising cast (hello again, Ronnie...
-
Here’s Looking at You, Kid
Chinggay and Patty speed through eight movies in under a week and weed through the naughty ones so you don’t have to watch them. Fast forward through holiday mediocrity and more couples in trouble and hit pause for a surprise makeout scene. We see Patty’s most beloved tropes from across the Pond...
-
Hotline Bling
Chinggay and Patty trudge through the holiday sludge before getting to the cream of the crop of this week. Nikki deLoach gets crowned as Queen of all Couples In Trouble ™, Lucas Bryant and Stephen Huszar are nominated as Dead Eyes Sr. and Jr., and Lacey Chabert looks fab in off-shoulder tops. The...
-
Our Two True Loves
Chinggay and Patty call it a tie—two naughties and two nice movies this week. We send Cindy Busby our Yuletide sympathies, are glad to have Good Witch Joy back in circulation, and are in support of Hallmark’s Fascination with Foreign Lands™️. Lastly, it’s a battle between Hallmark’s Finest with...
-
This Week Is Giving
Chinggay and Patty have zero notes because this week’s movies are pitch perfect—two thumbs up for every Hallmark genre. The always delightful Hunter King leads the pack in an ensemble / girls’ night out flick. Our fave Heartland gal Amber Marshall melts our hearts as she gets it on with...
-
The More You Hate, The More You Love
Chinggay and Patty have a huge slice of humble pie this week as their former Hallmark hates become this week’s big winners. While we wish Jaicy Elliot and Brant Daughtery could get a better storyline (no more stupid fables, please), we have no notes for the ultimate Zaddy himself, Brennan Elliot....
-
Higher End of Mid
Chinggay and Patty return to the pod as Hallmark launches Countdown to Christmas. On the first week of holiday movies, we get women in STEM with a too-hot brother, Kevin McGarry’s blue eyes and perfect hair, and Michael Rady making a comeback in a magical realism movie no one asked for but...
-
Pitcher Perfect
Chinggay and Patty skip the winter season and head straight into spring… with way more movies than they bargained for. It’s a mixed bag with clear losers, middling airtime fillers, and two of the best movies we’ve seen in a while, thanks to Hallmark’s two Erins—Krakow and Cahill. Plus: a new...
-
Countdown to Christmas, Wrapped
Chinggay and Patty’s own Miracle of Christmas? Making it through 10 weekly episodes, 40 movies, and a ton of surprises cameos this year. 2022 was a stacked year, but we’ve managed to whittle it down to the best 15, just for you. Happy New Year folks—see you next season. Thanks to Pietro Lazatin…
more -
A Four-peat for Hanukkah
Chinggay and Patty go bananas over the utter perfection that is “Hanukkah on Rye.” We’re talking Jewish nuance, a smashing ensemble cast, smart writing, witty banter, and our favorite trope of all: “You’ve Got Mail / The Shop Around the Corner.” Forget every other movie this week and just watch...
-
Glass Ceiling, Smashed
Chinggay and Patty revel at all the barriers that were broken this week. Jonathan Bennett’s efforts to spearhead inclusivity for the LGBTQ community were top notch—“The Holiday Sitter” is joining the ranks of Hallmark Christmas classics for years to come. The surprise of the season is Dayspring’s...
-
Balls to the Wall
Chinggay and Patty nearly call it quits after the most disappointing lineup of movies BMIH has ever seen. Kudos to Steven Huszar for sending shockwaves into our hearts by playing an ex-Navy Seal bodyguard. We watch these movies so you don’t have to—hear our thoughts and immediately tune into...
-
Haul Out the Big Guns, It’s Thanksgiving Week
Chinggay and Patty divvy up the Merry Thanksgiving movies into three categories—mediocre non-performers, basic Hallmark fare, and all-new classics everyone’s sure to rewatch for years to come. BMIH kings Tyler Hynes and Victor Webster take the cake this week, while HCU queens Lacey Chabert and...
-
Three Wise Feminists
Chinggay and Patty speed through the week’s meh movies in order to a fully fleshed out, in-depth look at Hallmark’s most highly-rated movie yet, “Three Wise Men and a Baby.” Andrew Walker (aka Captain America of the HCU) as a firefighter who looks after his family because he’s perfect like that,...
-
Nannies, Immigrants, Alzheimer’s, and Pop Stars
Chinggay and Patty are shocked. A Hallmark spy movie with royalty, children, and kidnapping? Hallmark Movies & Mysteries managing to cast someone as huge as Beau Bridges? An ambitious take on Love Actually… actually working? Patty not hating on Barbara Niven? And Brendan Penny being the dork to...
-
Welcome to the Hallmark Metaverse
Chinggay and Patty have called it—the first terrible movie of the year has made it to the lineup (consider yourselves warned). Ali Sweeney fails to appeal to BMIH’s cold, cynical hearts, but Marlo Thomas becomes a contender for Christmas mom of the year. Two of the HCU’s biggest leads go head to...
-
The Perfect Week: A Christmas Miracle
Chinggay and Patty’s jaws have dropped as they discuss a multitude of holiday twists. A resurrected dead husband? A non-Scrooge possibly falling in love with his grandma? Will Kemp’s American accent? Jodie Sweetin charming our hearts? Snark has left the building and has been replaced by pure,...
-
Hallmark Christmas is Back, Besties
Chinggay and Patty kick off the third annual BMIH Countdown to Christmas + Miracles of Christmas reviews with high hopes and high praises. Resident HCU A-lister Kristoffer Polaha leaves a lasting impression once again, Sarah Ramos makes waves as 2022’s fresh, bright newcomer, and in the biggest...
-
One Last Time with Chesapeake Shores
Chinggay and Patty mourn the end of their favorite Hallmark series and move through all the Season 6 highs, lows, and shoulda-woulda-couldas with heaps of nostalgia and sentimentality. There’s no contest when it comes to the O’Brien winners (Kevin and Mick 4ever; with Connor as a solid…
more -
Zaddy Peace Treaty
Chinggay and Patty agree that watching the entire fall lineup of the Hallmark Channel is next to impossible, and settle for six movies instead (most of which of don’t make the grade). The stunners of the season, however, are Hallmark royalty—there’s not a lot that Amanda Schull, Brennan Elliot,...
-
Never Too Early for Christmas
Chinggay and Patty send salty season’s greetings to movies from the HCU’s Christmas past and Christmas present. Aside from some horribly cast and terribly written oldies, it looks like fan faves Kevin and Kayla are dealt yet another dud. Good thing this season gave some sexy and surprising slays...
-
Summer Nights, Surprisingly Inoffensive
Chinggay and Patty dive right into Summer Nights ‘22 and are pleasantly surprised by its many hidden gems. A-listers Ashley Williams and Ryan Paevey steal the show with “Two Tickets to Paradise” and HCU rookies Hunter King and Beau Mirchoff make a case for enemies to lovers with “Hidden Gems.”…
more -
Have a Little Faithan Me
Chinggay and Patty talk lowlights, highlights, and plot suggestions for Season 10. Puppy love in the time of cholera, an alternate DILF timeline, and (just maybe) killing off the main character of the show. Plus, the new couple everyone needs to root for: Mountie Nathan and Newly Single Doctor...
-
High Class Stupidity
Chinggay and Patty play catchup on Hallmark’s 2022 lineup and pick five movies to diss and dish on. Get ready for all-new pitches for the HCU: the Luscious Locks Club, a cast switcheroo between our favorite WCTH couple Kevin and Kyla + superstars Tyler Hynes and Autumn Reeser, and a Regency…
more
About this show
Movie reviews… but make it Hallmark. Fangirls Chinggay and Patty flex their film rating muscles as they work their way through the Hallmark Cinematic Universe. All bets are off as they judge movie meet cutes, almost kisses, and fawn over their onscreen and offscreen HCU faves
Hosted by
Chinggay and Patty