PODCAST · kids
Climbing Fish Parenting
by Dr. Kristi Clarke
Your kid isn't broken. Your parenting isn't broken. Sometimes, we're just asking our fish to climb trees.If you're an exhausted parent who's tried everything and nothing has worked—this podcast is for you. You're carrying guilt about your parenting. Your child's behaviors don't respond to the typical strategies. The advice from books, friends, and even professionals just... doesn't fit.Here's what I need you to know: You're not failing. You're just using the wrong map.I'm Dr. Kristi, a psychologist and behavior analyst, and I help parents understand their child's unique wiring and use strategies that actually work. Whether your child has a diagnosis or you just know they're wired differently—whether it's ADHD, ASD, anxiety, sensory sensitivities, or they're just... not like the parenting books describe—this is for you.No fluff. No shame. Just practical, evidence-based guidance from someone who gets it.Each episode gives you real strategies for real challenges—meltdowns, school str
Episodes
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Helping Your Child Through the Social Side of Halloween
Halloween isn't only about costumes and candy. For a lot of kids, it's a night of unspoken social rules: who's going with whom, who got invited, and what happens when your child's plans don't match everyone else's. If you're wondering how to help your child through the social side of Halloween,...
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Meltdown or Tantrum? How to Tell the Difference (and What Your Child Needs From You)
Your child falls apart, and in the moment you can't tell whether they're overwhelmed or upset that the answer is no. If you've ever wondered whether you're looking at a meltdown or a tantrum, and why the same response helps one day and backfires the next, this episode explains what's usually…
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The Coat Standoff: Why Your Child Refuses the Jacket (and What to Do About It)
Your child refuses the coat, insists they're not cold, or takes it off miserable ten minutes later, and every morning feels like a standoff. If you're wondering why kids fight the jacket even when they're clearly too cold, too warm, or uncomfortable, this episode explains what's usually going on...
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Why Homework Takes Forever
Homework shouldn't take forty-five minutes for ten problems — but somehow it does, and it turns into a fight nobody wanted. If your kid stalls before starting, gets stuck demanding answers you can't give, or melts down the second you sit down together, this episode is for you. In this episode…
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How to Reach a Teen Who Won't Talk
All summer they were around — at dinner, in the car, saying yes to things. Then the door started closing a little harder than it needed to. One-word answers. Everything you ask lands like too much. You didn't lose your kid. But you can feel the distance, and you're not sure how to cross it. In…
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When Reassurance Stops Working
You're sitting on the edge of your kid's bed, reassuring them for the tenth time — you're safe, it's okay, that won't happen — and it lands for about ninety seconds before the next question comes. Forty-five minutes in, they're more wound up than when you started, and you can't shake the…
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Back to School Stress for Teens
Picture a teenager who was moderately engaged all summer — around, at dinner, saying yes to things. Then school gets close, and the door starts closing a little harder than it needs to. Moodier. Doesn't want to do anything, or only wants to be out with friends. Every question lands like too much....
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Your School Year Reset
You built the beautiful plan — the one where this is finally the year it all runs like a machine. And by day three you're standing in the kitchen realizing you've fed everyone but yourself, running on cold coffee and getting short with everyone, thinking: this is not sustainable. In this episode:...
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Back-to-school anxiety
Your kid was thriving all summer — handling things that used to be hard, genuinely in their element. And then, a couple weeks before school, they couldn't be in the same room as their siblings without it exploding, and refused fun activities they love. You have no idea what is wrong. Nothing was...
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The Fear of Finding Out: Should You Get Your Child a Diagnosis?
You've wondered — maybe more than once — whether there's something going on with your kid that has a name. And you've decided you'd rather not find out. Not because you don't care, but because a diagnosis feels scary, or final, or like it might change everything. In this episode: Why not knowing...
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Why "Just Get Him Evaluated" Is Such Confusing Advice
It's eleven at night, everyone's finally asleep, and you're on your phone with a list of providers open in front of you — no idea how to tell one from the next, feeling like you were supposed to already know the difference. Nobody handed you the glossary. So let's sort it out. In this episode…
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Why Pool Days Keep Ending in Meltdowns (Even the Fun Ones)
Two families, same neighborhood pool, same Saturday afternoon. One leaves after about forty minutes — daughter smiling, a little sun-pink, tired in the good way. The other stays the full four hours and leaves in a complete meltdown, son sobbing in the parking lot, nobody quite sure what went…
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Supported Momentum — Why Small Wins Build Big Confidence
A dad spent three weekends trying to get his daughter to jump off the diving board — "just do it, you'll see it's fine" — and three weekends of tears. What actually worked was smaller than anything he'd tried: sitting on the edge with her feet in the water. By the fourth weekend, she jumped on…
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Stop fixing the child. Start reading the tide.
Two moms, same friend group, same parenting workshop, same exact tool — a five-step sticker chart with a small reward at the end of the week. One family used it for three weeks and mornings actually got easier. The other used it for four days before it fell apart completely, more conflict than...
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Vacation Meltdowns: Why Time Off Doesn't Feel Like a Break for Kids who are Wired Differently
It's day two of the trip you've been planning for months. Ocean house, grandparents, a countdown your kid had on their wall — and now they're on the floor, sobbing, over which beach towel they got. Not a preference. A full meltdown. Over a towel. In this episode: Why "keep the routine the same"...
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Why Some Kids Implode and Others Explode
Two kids. Same overwhelm, same stress, sometimes even the same diagnosis. And somehow one of them is loud about it, and the other one disappears. In this episode, Dr. Kristi breaks down why the exact same struggle can produce two completely different-looking kids — and why it has nothing to do…
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The Skill Nobody's Born With
A dad spends an entire summer teaching his son to ride a bike — holding the seat, running alongside, letting him wobble. Two weeks later, he's in the kitchen telling that same kid to "just calm down" during a meltdown over a broken cookie, with none of that same patience or teaching. No...
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Why Your Teen's Reactions Feel So Much Bigger Than the Moment
"You don't even like spending time with me." That's what came back after a mom asked her sixteen-year-old for one thing: text me when you get there. One line. Four seconds. And somehow it turned into a conversation about whether they'd ever have a good relationship. In this episode: -Why a…
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"I'm Bored": What Your Neurodivergent Kid Is Actually Telling You
You've pointed at the Lego bin. You've listed the options. You've suggested the thing they asked for three weeks ago. And they're still standing there looking at you like you are personally responsible for the problem. "I'm bored" — and it's not even July yet. In this episode: Why the school...
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Summer Q&A: Chores That Never Get Done, House Rules That Aren't Sticking, and Yes — Whether Your Kid Actually Needs to Shower
School is out — and suddenly you're realizing your kid has no idea how to set the table, hasn't showered since Tuesday, and is tracking mud through the kitchen for the fourteenth time this week. Summer doesn't create new problems. It reveals the ones that were always there, quietly held up by...
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The Child Only You Know
You've been in that room. The parent-teacher conference. The conversation with the coach or the family member who loves your child and is still somehow describing a person you don't quite recognize. And you sat there, nodding, holding it together, thinking: that's not my kid. That's a version of…
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Why Your Teenager Holds It Together All Day — And What That's Actually Costing Them
The shower drain kept clogging. They used Draino. They snaked it themselves. They called a plumber. Nobody connected it to their daughter. And then a mom went to smooth her daughter's comforter. And saw a clump of hair on the pillow. That pause — before she fully understood what she was looking…
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The Child Who Saves Their Worst for You
You pick them up from school and the teacher says it was a great day. The report is good. By every external measure — fine. And then you get to the parking lot. Or the dinner table. Or the moment the front door closes and the backpack hits the floor. And the child who held it together all day is...
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What Mother's Day Showed You (That Nobody Else Could See)
Mother's Day doesn't always look like the pictures. Sometimes it looks like a meltdown in the parking lot. Sometimes it looks like an hour finally to yourself that you spent thinking about your kid anyway. Sometimes it looks like buying the card yourself the night before and signing your child's...
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The Fear Every Parent of a Wired-Differently Kid Carries Alone
"The Fear Every Parent of a Wired-Differently Kid Carries Alone" There is a distance between where your child is right now and where the world expects them to be. You live in that distance every single day. You manage it, scaffold it, show up for it again and again — and then do it all over again...
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When Everyone Else's Parenting Advice Makes Things Worse
You're at the pediatrician's office. You start listing everything you've tried — sticker charts, time-outs, natural consequences, behavior contracts. And the doctor nods and says: have you tried being more consistent? And something inside you breaks a little bit. Because yes. You have. Here's…
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When You Realize You've Been Performing Calm — What Comes Next
You stayed calm. While everything around you escalated — while words were flying and the room was filling with heat — you made a choice to be the counterweight. You kept your voice low and steady. You stayed in the room when every instinct said otherwise. And then your child turned around and…
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Your Teen Isn't Checking Out. They're Running on Empty.
Your teenager failed multiple classes last semester. Not because they didn't understand the material — their teacher says they're one of the most engaged kids in the room. But the assignments aren't getting turned in. And when you ask why, they shrug. "I don't know." You've taken away the phone....
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Your Child Isn't Falling Apart - Their Brain Just Hit Its Limit
It's 3:15pm. Your child just walked through the door. They drop their backpack somewhere between the entryway and the kitchen — not where it goes, just somewhere. You ask how their day was. They grunt. You ask if they have homework. They explode. Not a little frustrated. Not mildly annoyed....
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How to Talk to Grandparents About Your Child's Needs (Without Losing Your Mind)
How to Talk to Grandparents About Your Child's Needs (Without Losing Your Mind) You're at Sunday dinner. Your child melts down when it's time to leave. And your mom says—not unkindly, but with that tone—"He's fine. You just need to be firmer with him." Or your father-in-law laughs: "She doesn't…
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Why Your Child's Meltdowns Don't Mean They Hate You
Why Your Child's Meltdowns Don't Mean They Hate You It's Tuesday night. Homework time. You say, gently, "Just three more problems." Their jaw clenches. Their shoulders rise. The pencil flies across the room, the paper rips, the chair crashes into the wall. And they scream right in your face: I…
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Listener Q&A: Your Questions Answered
Listener Q&A: Your Questions Answered You send me questions all the time—through emails, DMs, after workshops—and today I'm answering four of the ones I hear most often. Real questions from real parents who are in the trenches, dealing with the things that don't make it into the parenting books....
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When Your Tween Pushes You Away But Still Needs You
Your 12-year-old walks in from school. You say, "Hey, how was your day?" They don't look up. "Fine." You try again—a sigh, an eye roll, "Can you not?" And they walk past you, go to their room, and shut the door. Your stomach drops. Three hours later, they're melting down over homework and need…
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The Resentment You Don't Want to Admit
It's 8:47 PM. You've been awake since 5:30. The morning started with a 45-minute battle over wrong socks. Homework took two hours. Bedtime is still not done. And somewhere in that exhausted, tight-chested moment, you feel it—that burning thought: This is not fair. Immediately followed by…
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When Your Child Refuses Medication: What's Really Happening and What Actually Works
My child needs medication—for ADHD, for anxiety, for whatever—but they won't take it. I've tried hiding it in food. I've tried rewards. I've tried consequences. We battle every single morning and I don't know what to do. Sound familiar? Underneath that battle is so much guilt—guilt that you can't...
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Morning Routines for Tweens and Teens: When They 'Should Know Better'
Your child is thirteen, fourteen, fifteen years old. Old enough to have a phone. Old enough to want independence. Old enough that well-meaning relatives keep asking, "Why can't they just get themselves ready?" And you're watching your teenager—who can recite entire dialogue sequences from their...
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The One Morning Routine Mistake That's Sabotaging Everything Else
You've tried teaching the skills. You've tried building routines. And it still falls apart every single morning. Here's what you're missing: you're trying to do too much at once. When I ask parents to walk me through their morning routine, they list fifteen tasks. Then I ask which of those…
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Why Traditional Morning Routine Charts Fail Kids Wired Differently
If you've created a beautiful visual schedule—laminated cards, Velcro, pictures for every step—and your child is still melting down every morning, wandering off mid-routine, or standing in their underwear twenty minutes after being told to get dressed, I need you to hear this: That chart isn't...
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Building a Support System When You Feel Totally Alone
If you're parenting a child who's wired differently and you feel completely alone in it, that's not random and it's not your fault. Maybe family doesn't understand why you do things differently. Maybe friends stopped inviting you places. Maybe you can't find a babysitter who can handle your…
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Your Nervous System Matters Too: Co-Regulation Starts with Self-Regulation
"Just stay calm." "Be the calm in the storm." Easy to say, impossible to do when you're already depleted from co-regulating through three transitions before breakfast, making seventy decisions, and absorbing your child's anxiety all morning. Here's the truth: you can't lend your child a calm...
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The Myth of "Doing It All": What Sustainable Parenting Actually Looks Like
If you're trying to "do it all"—homemade meals, organized systems, consistent routines, patience, self-care—while parenting a child who's wired differently, I need you to hear this: You're not failing because you're not trying hard enough. You're failing because the goal itself is impossible.…
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Why Parenting a Child Who's Wired Differently Is So Exhausting (And It's Not Your Fault)
If you're completely drained from parenting your child who's wired differently—and wondering if you're just not cut out for this—I need you to hear this: It's not because you're weak or doing it wrong. There are very specific, research-backed reasons why this type of parenting is exponentially…
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The Power of Validation: Why Your Kid Desperately Needs It
"Great, another therapy word that sounds nice but doesn't actually help when my kid is having a full meltdown in Target." I get it. But here's the thing: validation is one of the most powerful tools you have for reducing meltdowns, building confidence, and teaching your child to trust themselves....
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Grief and the Holidays: How to Help Your Child (And Yourself) Through Loss
Your child just asked when Grandma's coming back—for the fifth time this week. Or they're melting down over nothing. Or they seem completely fine while you're barely holding it together. And you're thinking: Am I doing this wrong? Should I hide my tears? Will talking about it make it worse?…
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Why Behavior Gets Worse Before It Gets Better (And How to Survive It)
You finally implemented a behavior plan. Day one went great. Day two was even better. And then day three hit—and your child didn't just whine, they SCREAMED. They escalated harder than ever before. And you're standing there thinking: "What did I do wrong? This was working!" Here's the truth: You...
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Backtalk & Defiance: What Your Child Really Means (And How to Respond)
Your child just said "That's not fair!" or "You can't make me!" and you're standing there thinking: Is this disrespect? Should I shut this down? Or am I about to crush my child's voice? Here's the truth: Most of us don't know. We're navigating a massive cultural shift in parenting without a...
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What's Normal Pushback vs. Actual Disrespect (By Age)
Your child just rolled their eyes at you. Or said "no" for the tenth time today. Or told you your rule is "so unfair." And you're standing there wondering: Is this normal? Or am I raising a disrespectful kid? Here's what you need to know: Most pushback isn't disrespect—it's normal development.…
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Why Your Boundaries Matter More Than You Think (And How to Set Them)
If you struggle to set boundaries with your child—if you say yes when you want to say no, if you give in to avoid conflict, if you feel guilty every time you hold a limit—this episode is for you. Here's the truth: The boundaries you set (or don't set) are directly teaching your child what...
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How to Handle Thanksgiving Without the Food Fights, Judgment, or Meltdowns
Thanksgiving is coming. And you're not worried about the turkey—you're worried about what happens at the table. Your child only eats three foods, none of which are on the menu. Grandma's already making comments. And you're wondering: do we skip it altogether, or bring safe foods and deal with the...
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Whining Decoded: How to Stop It Without Losing Your Mind
That sound. You know the one. That grating, nails-on-a-chalkboard whine that makes your entire nervous system want to crawl out of your skin. "Moooooom, I want a snaaaack." "This is toooooo haaaaard." Here's what you need to know: Whining doesn't just annoy you—it activates your nervous system in…
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ABOUT THIS SHOW
Your kid isn't broken. Your parenting isn't broken. Sometimes, we're just asking our fish to climb trees.If you're an exhausted parent who's tried everything and nothing has worked—this podcast is for you. You're carrying guilt about your parenting. Your child's behaviors don't respond to the typical strategies. The advice from books, friends, and even professionals just... doesn't fit.Here's what I need you to know: You're not failing. You're just using the wrong map.I'm Dr. Kristi, a psychologist and behavior analyst, and I help parents understand their child's unique wiring and use strategies that actually work. Whether your child has a diagnosis or you just know they're wired differently—whether it's ADHD, ASD, anxiety, sensory sensitivities, or they're just... not like the parenting books describe—this is for you.No fluff. No shame. Just practical, evidence-based guidance from someone who gets it.Each episode gives you real strategies for real challenges—meltdowns, school str
HOSTED BY
Dr. Kristi Clarke
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Frequently Asked Questions
How many episodes does Climbing Fish Parenting have?
Climbing Fish Parenting currently has 56 episodes available on PodParley. New episodes are automatically indexed when they're published to the podcast feed.
What is Climbing Fish Parenting about?
Your kid isn't broken. Your parenting isn't broken. Sometimes, we're just asking our fish to climb trees.If you're an exhausted parent who's tried everything and nothing has worked—this podcast is for you. You're carrying guilt about your parenting. Your child's behaviors don't respond to the...
How often does Climbing Fish Parenting release new episodes?
Climbing Fish Parenting has 56 episodes. Check the episode list to see recent publication dates and frequency.
Where can I listen to Climbing Fish Parenting?
You can listen to Climbing Fish Parenting on PodParley by clicking any episode. We provide an embedded audio player for direct listening, and you can also subscribe via your preferred podcast app using the RSS feed.
Who hosts Climbing Fish Parenting?
Climbing Fish Parenting is created and hosted by Dr. Kristi Clarke.
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