Desperately Seeking Senior Living
by Valerie Lynn Borgman
For all the sons, daughters, grandkids, spouses and ALL caregivers who suddenly find themselves tangled in the search for senior living and care. We’re interviewing real families who have been through the process. We’re talking tips, red tape and industry speak. Let us help you go from desperate to doable!
Episodes
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The Art of Advocacy: How to Speak Up for Someone You Love
What happens when the hospital says your loved one is ready to go home, but you know it isn't safe? Or when a doctor says no to a treatment you believe they need? In this personal episode of Desperately Seeking Senior Living, Valerie Lynn shares lessons from advocating for her younger sister...
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You Think Mom Needs More Help - She Doesn't - Who's Right? EP 173
In this episode of Desperately Seeking Senior Living, Valerie Lynn explores the “line in the sand” - the point when living independently may need to look a little different. From falls and driving to showering, housekeeping, medications and home safety, you’ll learn why your definition of “needs...
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From Moving Across States to Finding Help in Unexpected Places: Jessica Guthrie's 12 Year + Caregiving Journey - EP 172
When Jessica Guthrie’s mom, Constance, was diagnosed with Alzheimer’s disease at just 65 years old, Jessica was only 26. Nearly 12 years later, Jessica has experienced the caregiving journey through changing routines, wandering, researching memory care, hiring in-home caregivers, moving back into...
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Caregiving & Your Other Job - What Every Boss Should Know - EP 171
What happens when caregiving collides with the workplace? In this episode of Desperately Seeking Senior Living, Valerie sits down with caregiving strategist and Alzheimer's advocate Jessica C. Guthrie to explore the business side of caregiving. Together, they discuss the challenges millions of...
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A Grandson's 20-Year Dementia Caregiving Journey: Lessons Every Family Caregiver Needs - EP 170
For more than 20 years, Ed Taylor helped care for his grandmother through dementia - long before he ever considered himself a caregiver. In this episode of Desperately Seeking Senior Living, Ed shares the realities of family caregiving, including navigating cognitive decline, managing crises,...
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Assisted Living Asked You to Move Out - Aging in Place Explained - EP 169
You moved your loved one into assisted living, signed the paperwork and finally exhaled… then came the phone call no family wants to receive: “We can no longer meet their care needs.” In this episode, Valerie breaks down why assisted living communities sometimes ask residents to move, what…
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When Assisted Living Doesn’t Feel Right - Expectations vs Reality - EP 168
You can do everything “right” and still walk away feeling unsure - and that doesn’t mean you failed. This episode gently walks you through the difference between something being wrong and something simply not being right for you. Because senior living isn’t just about care on paper - it’s about…
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Is the Hospital Discharging Too Soon? What Families Can Do - EP 167
Getting a call that your dad is being discharged from the hospital can send you straight into panic mode - especially when you know there’s no safe plan waiting at home. In this episode, we talk about why hospitals move so quickly, what “medically stable” really means, and the one powerful phrase...
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When In-Home Care Stops Working - Ep 166
You tried everything. You rearranged your life, asked for help and honored your loved one’s wish to stay at home by bringing in in-home care. But what happens when it still isn’t working? In this episode of Desperately Seeking Senior Living, host Valerie Lynn walks through the moment many…
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It May Not Be Forever: Rethinking Senior Living Decisions - Ep 165
Making decisions about senior living can feel overwhelming - especially when you’ve promised a loved one they could stay at home. When care needs change, families often feel rushed, guilty and afraid that one move means forever. In this episode, I reframe senior living decisions through a…
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One More Christmas at Home - Ep 164
Holidays bring up big emotions, long-held traditions, and a whole lot of pressure... and when you suddenly notice changes in someone you love, it can feel like the world shifts under your feet. In this episode, we break down whether it’s safe to wait until after the holidays to move to assisted...
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New Jersey Senior Living and Care Options with Kat Verdi - Ep 163
In this episode, caregiver coach and dementia-care trainer Kat Verdi joins Valerie to break down what families need to know about independent living, assisted living, memory care, and buy-in communities across the Garden State. From understanding the real differences between care types to asking...
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Washington State Senior Living and Care Options with Morgan Nelson - Ep 162
If you’ve ever tried to figure out senior living or care options in Washington State, you know just how overwhelming it can be. From 55+ communities to assisted living, memory care, adult family homes, and in-home care — there’s a lot to untangle. In this episode, I sit down with Morgan Nelson to...
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What Is PACE? Program of All-Inclusive Care for the Elderly with Kara Jovag - Ep 161
You know that feeling when you’re doing everything right for your aging parent and it still feels impossible to keep up? That’s where today’s episode comes in. I’m joined by Kara JVA from the PACE program—an all-inclusive care model that helps older adults live safely at home while still…
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Missouri Senior Living and Care Options with Erin Dwyer - Ep 160
In this episode, we explore senior living in Missouri with Erin Dwyer of Senior Care Authority, who shares her vast knowledge of the state’s senior care options, including the challenges families face when funds run low. We discuss the financial limitations of Medicaid in Missouri, the…
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Colorado Senior Living and Care Options with Jan Peterson - Ep 159
If you're exploring senior living options in Colorado—or even just wondering what makes this state different—we've got you covered. In this episode, I’m joined by Jan Peterson, a Certified Senior Advisor and founder of Blossoms Senior Placement in Denver. With deep roots in Colorado and years of...
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The Senior Living Amenities Trap - Ep 158
It’s easy to get swept up in the shiny stuff - movie theaters, cafes, even tanning beds! And honestly? There’s nothing wrong with loving those features. But when it comes to choosing a senior living community, your expectations (and theirs) need to align. In this episode, we explore how to tell…
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Florida Senior Living and Care Options with Carline Cadet Francois - Ep 157
When you're sandwiched between raising kids and caring for aging parents, the stress can feel overwhelming - especially in a state like Florida, where senior living options are vast but complex. In this episode, I’m joined by Carline Cadet Francois @FloridaALFConsulting, a dynamic healthcare...
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Hospice Conversations and Games to Spark Discussion with Lisa Paul - Ep 156
No one’s excited to talk about death or senior living, but waiting until there’s a crisis - just makes it harder. In this heartfelt and eye-opening episode, Lisa Pahl and I peel back the layers of fear, guilt, and denial that so often block these conversations. With humor, honesty, and a whole…
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Why Do Memory Care Communities Have a Bad Reputation? - Ep 155
Memory care can feel overwhelming - especially when you’ve heard horror stories or toured a community that didn’t feel right. But not all memory care communities are the same, and knowing what to look for can make all the difference. In this episode, I answer Jan’s question: Why do I hear so many...
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Hospice, Prayer, and Cultural Traditions with Hospice Nurse Penny - Ep 154
I’m so excited to welcome Hospice Nurse Penny back to the show! In this episode we're talking about her new book Influencing Death: Reframing Dying for Better Living. In this episode, we discuss: 11:19 Advanced Planning 15:00 Cultural Traditions & Prayer 29:05 Misconceptions About Hospice 41:53...
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Are Assisted Living and Memory Care Communities Safe? - Ep 153
All assisted living and dementia care communities have to be safe...right? In this episode, Valerie Lynn walks you through everything you need to know about evaluating safety in senior living - from essential physical features like fall prevention and security systems to medical care and…
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Why the Holidays Are the Perfect Time to Talk Senior Living - Ep 152
Many families share that being home for the holidays prompted siblings and other family members to finally see what they were seeing all along. Mom might need more help. The holidays bring families together, making it the ideal time to start conversations about senior living. In this episode, I...
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Hospice, Family Dynamics, and Guardianship with Ginni Ryan - Ep 151
I was so excited to welcome back Ginni Ryan, who worked in the senior living industry has for over 25 years. She is currently with Revel Communities. We had such a great conversation in my previous episode, about making that move to an independent living community and how difficult the decision…
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Why Choose Independent Living? with Ginni Ryan - Ep 150
I'm independent at home - so why do I need an independent senior living community? I’m so excited to welcome Ginni Ryan, the Vice President of Operations for Revel Communities. At Revel Communities, Ginni is responsible for the operations of the entire portfolio of independent living communities....
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Should You Give Your Phone Number to Senior Living Communities? - Ep 149
You’re struggling to manage caring for mom or dad. You’re juggling work, trying to manage the dwindling finances that are necessary to care for your aging parent or loved one and the pressure of it all is dizzying. The push to answer questions and make decisions you’re not ready to make can leave...
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Dementia in Public and Caregiver Isolation - Ep 148
Whether it’s a grocery store, a family gathering, or even the doctor’s office—when your mom doesn’t quite act like she used to or dad begins to get agitated, it’s difficult, it’s heartbreaking, and it can leave you not only feeling overwhelmed and anxious but also like maybe you should just stay...
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Don’t Wait for the Money to Run Out: Paying for Senior Living - Ep 147
Senior living and care is expensive - how can you plan? In this episode, I tackle the financial challenges families face with senior care, stressing the importance of early planning to avoid future stress. With assisted living costs averaging $4,500 a month, many are blindsided by the expenses....
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How Do I Convince My Mom to Leave Her Home? - Ep 146
You KNOW your mom or dad isn't safe at home alone but they are refusing to leave their home so what are you supposed to do when you truly believe it’s what’s best? In this episode, we’re exploring one of the most difficult conversations many of us will face: convincing your mom or dad, to leave...
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Hospice, Death, and Cultural Traditions with Hospice Nurse Penny - Ep 145
No one wants to talk about or even think about senior living and care and I think that goes double for death and dying. I’m so excited to welcome Penny Hawkins Smith to the show. She’s a nationally certified hospice & palliative care registered nurse with over 17 years of experience. You may know...
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When a Community Changes Its Mind About Medicaid - Ep 144
You toured a few assisted living communities …you were very up front with all of them about the money situation. The community your mom chose said don’t worry! When your mom runs out of money, we’ll take Medicaid. No Problem! Until it was a BIG problem. I can’t believe how many times this has...
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Can Your Loved One Fail the Assisted Living Nurse Assessment? - Ep 143
Are they going to let my mom in? Is there anything that could come up that would make the community not take my dad? My mom is really nervous. She’s afraid she won’t pass the test. These are all statements I’ve heard from families when it comes to the assisted living nurse assessment. While the...
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What's Love got to do with Assisted Living & Memory Care? - Ep 142
I’ve often heard families say that moving their mom or dad into assisted living or memory care kindof felt like dropping their kids off at daycare that first time. Why would it feel that way? The first time I dropped my son off at daycare is burned in my brain. He cried...I cried…it was terrible!…
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What's Under Lock & Key in a Memory Care Community - Ep 141
Why do certain items get locked up in memory care communities and adult family homes? Was there a list of items like medications, vitamins, and even flowers and plants that you were told would be locked up before move-in day? It is vital to understand the importance of these "lock-up" precautions...
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Dementia Caregiving, Grief, and Joy with Patty LaFleur - Ep 140
Patti LaFleur is the Lorenzo’s House Youth Initiatives and Outreach Lead. Patti is the former carepartner to her mom, Linda, who had younger-onset dementia - and a former elementary educator of over 10 years. Patti designs and leads our youth programming with intentionality, knowledge and love.…
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Embracing Dementia and Overcoming Denial with Ana Burnes - Ep 139
Ana Burnes is a seasoned marketing professional with over a decade of experience forging strong community partnerships. Her extensive background includes leadership roles and a specialized focus in the medical field, where she excels in patient care and assistance. Ana is dedicated to making a...
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Activities and Expectations in Senior Living - Ep 138
You’re on your first tour of a memory care community and as you walk in to the common area you stop in your tracks. All the residents are lined up facing a big screen TV. You don’t even remember what was on the screen because you just couldn’t stop thinking… is this what they do all day? In this...
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Ageism in Healthcare and How to Advocate with Dr. Corinne Auman - Ep 137
Dr. Corinne Auman is a Gerontologist with over 20 years of experience. She has a Ph.D. in Developmental Psychology with a specialty in adulthood & aging. She's an author, educator, caregiving and aging expert. Corinne’s passion for educating families comes from her own family's caregiving journey...
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When Your Parent Is No Longer Safe at Home - Ep 136
They don’t give you a handbook when your mom or dad isn’t safe to live alone any longer… This is what a family member recently said to me and while a complete handbook would be way more involved than this podcast episode…and probably not even possible… I’m going to share insights from families…
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Helping an Aging Parent Accept Care with Angela Garcia - Ep 135
Has your loved one said they’re never moving from their house but they’re also refusing to let you bring in a caregiver…to help them with that shower or make that meal? Well then you do not want to miss this episode! Angela Garcia is here to share her secret sauce for helping seniors accept the...
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Losing a Loved One to Dementia, Rehab & Adult Care Homes with Sharon Miller - Ep 134
In this episode, Sharon opens up about her journey alongside her husband, Loyd, as they navigate life with Dementia. From those heart-sinking moments of noticing Loyd's memory and ability to communicate slip away to caregiving, strong views about skilled nursing & rehab and finding the right…
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Helping Your Doctor Diagnose Dementia - Ep 133
Many folks love and respect their doctor this is one reason they’re the first line of defense when it comes to a Dementia diagnosis, however studies show that families often aren't receiving the assistance they expected. Studies also show a lack of Dementia training for Primary Care Physicians.…
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Advocating in Memory Care for What Your Loved One Used to Love - Ep 132
Last episode we talked about this same topic but we applied it to those in Independent and assisted living. We talked about getting creative and advocating ….and with Memory care I believe that’s even more important …if you’re listening and you’re a family member looking for memory care I believe...
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Advocating in Assisted Living for the Things Your Loved One Loves - Ep 131
Some of my favorite stories in senior living have come from finding that thing…that activity…that spark.... that makes this really difficult transition… a little more personal. Many seniors express that moving to senior living is where they're going to die or that you...their loved one or…
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Hospital Discharge to Rehab: Do You Have Other Options? - Ep 130
Rehab…. Short term rehab…. Skilled nursing facility… SNF… Through the years, I've witnessed families struggle with tough decisions, particularly when it comes to transitioning to assisted-living or memory care following a crisis at home, often triggered by a fall or illness. Unfortunately, about...
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Medicaid Spend Down and Senior Living Implications Explained - Ep 129
What is a Medicaid spend down?? Does it mean my mom is guaranteed to qualify for Medicaid after she spends down her money? If you’ve started your search for senior living and care and are concerned about finances… it’s likely you’ve heard the word Medicaid and the phrases straight Medicaid and…
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What You Don’t Know About the Senior Living Industry with Melissa Fritz - Ep 128
You’ve started to google senior living and care and maybe you’re scratching your head trying to figure out - why it's so confusing! I’m your host Valerie Lynn and…in this episode I’m talking with industry professional and host of the upcoming PBS North special, Inside Senior Living, Melissa…
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First Responders, Caregivers, and Dementia - Ep 127
Does your state...city...county require dementia training for your Police Officers and EMT's? Many do not. In this episode, we’re talking about interactions with first responders and their Dementia training or lack of dementia training and what caregivers can do to help. CLICK HERE for our DOABLE...
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What Happens During a Senior Living Home Visit? - Ep 126
When you toured a community you most likely gave them your phone number and most likely your Mom gave them hers. When you do that you’re going to get follow up phone calls. That call is to check in and see where you’re at in the process and how things are going. From this call the home visit is...
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Behind the Scenes of a Senior Living Community with Tina Nutt - Ep 125
Have you ever wondered what it takes to run an assisted living community? Should you ask to meet the person in charge and is there anything you should be asking them? Who exactly IS the person in charge and what should you expect from them when your mom or dad lives there? In this episode, we’re...
About this show
For all the sons, daughters, grandkids, spouses and ALL caregivers who suddenly find themselves tangled in the search for senior living and care. We’re interviewing real families who have been through the process. We’re talking tips, red tape and industry speak. Let us help you go from desperate to doable!
Hosted by
Valerie Lynn Borgman
Categories