Distractible

No perfectest crime? Well hey, everyone makes mistakes. Support A Real Good Future at realgoodai.org/donate Learn more about your ad choices. Visit megaphone.fm/adchoices

Quick, get flat! Learn more about your ad choices. Visit megaphone.fm/adchoices

Dear Penthouse Forum, I can't believe it happened to him. Learn more about your ad choices. Visit megaphone.fm/adchoices

Anything is on the table when the horny penguins and metal pipes come out to play. Learn more about your ad choices. Visit megaphone.fm/adchoices

Bob decides to raise Mark and Wade's blood pressure, to test their already fragile health. Learn more about your ad choices. Visit megaphone.fm/adchoices

What do book fairs, dentists, and summer camp have in common? Well, the bible says... Learn more about your ad choices. Visit megaphone.fm/adchoices

What happened to Mark at the Oscars, and what's that under Bob's shoe? Learn more about your ad choices. Visit megaphone.fm/adchoices

Bob brings back a classic Distractible game, dicier than ever. Learn more about your ad choices. Visit megaphone.fm/adchoices

WARNING: For today only, avoid recording ADR, baking bread, solving math equations, and watching movies starring Will Smith. Learn more about your ad choices. Visit megaphone.fm/adchoices

Bob tries to make sense of Mark and Wade's senses. Learn more about your ad choices. Visit megaphone.fm/adchoices

PUT THIS COMPILATION IN GUAM! Learn more about your ad choices. Visit megaphone.fm/adchoices

If this compilation proves anything, it's that the Curse Of The Drowned Man is still alive well (despite what certain Bald-Face liars may want to believe.) Learn more about your ad choices. Visit megaphone.fm/adchoices

E-I-E-I-Oh boy! It's a bountiful harvest in the Distractible Vault tonight, with a collection of Mark's updates on ol' bessy herself: The Render Farm! Learn more about your ad choices. Visit megaphone.fm/adchoices

Professor Wade "Bald" Barnes quizzes students Mark and Bob on their knowledge of the alphabet. Learn more about your ad choices. Visit megaphone.fm/adchoices

Bob and Wade go into the field to bring the hottest, slipperiest, and trippiest scoops to you. Get set up quick and connect to their fast speeds. Learn more about your ad choices. Visit megaphone.fm/adchoices

Don't look now, but that just might be a spooky new compilation staring back at you in the dark... Learn more about your ad choices. Visit megaphone.fm/adchoices

No need adjust your computer settings, this compilation features some the most memorable moments where things went wrong in all the right ways. Learn more about your ad choices. Visit megaphone.fm/adchoices

There's baby fever floating around The Distractible Vault as we share some highlights from the last few years of Bob raising his son, James. Get set up quick and connect to their fast speeds. Learn more about your ad choices. Visit megaphone.fm/adchoices

Who's that peeping back at you through your telescope? Is it Mupiter? The Death Star Boob? One can only wonder... Get set up quick and connect to their fast speeds. Valid on restaurant orders only. Learn more at ⁠bit.ly/GHEatTheFees⁠ Learn more about your ad choices. Visit megaphone.fm/adchoices

Don't your worry your precious head, just relax and let the good doctors do their jobs. *Gun Gary walks in* Get set up quick and connect to their fast speeds. Learn more about your ad choices. Visit megaphone.fm/adchoices

The three angy boys discuss what turns each of them into grumpy-wumpy-wumpersons. Get set up quick and connect to their fast speeds. Watch Video Now: https://spotify.link/distractible Learn more about your ad choices. Visit megaphone.fm/adchoices

Fortunately, Wade has a new improv game for Bob and Mark. Unfortunately, bald. Get set up quick and connect to their fast speeds. Learn more about your ad choices. Visit megaphone.fm/adchoices

Wade's not bald, he's just drawn that way. Get set up quick and connect to their fast speeds. Check out shopify.com/distractible today Learn more about your ad choices. Visit megaphone.fm/adchoices

Is that the piercing sound of an explosion, or Mark trying to sing in falsetto? We'll never know... Get set up quick and connect to their fast speeds. Learn more about your ad choices. Visit megaphone.fm/adchoices

The "Lost Boys" take a trip to Neverland to share the childhood things they'll never be too old for. Learn more about your ad choices. Visit megaphone.fm/adchoices

Your favorite Distractible game just got a whole lot more medical. Learn more about your ad choices. Visit megaphone.fm/adchoices

The guys bundle up for a trip down memory lane and share their (maybe) true stories from snow days. Iron Lung Is In Theaters Now! Buy your tickets at ironlung.com. Learn more about your ad choices. Visit megaphone.fm/adchoices

Mark's movie is almost out, Wade finds some time to relax, and Bob introduces his bouncing baby girl, Dor (but who tf cares about her.) Reserve your ticket now at ironlung.com. Only in theaters January 30, 2026. Learn more about your ad choices. Visit megaphone.fm/adchoices

The reviews are in, and critics are raving: "Finally! A star that out-shines the rest!" - The Minion Chronicle "If I said I didn't like it, that would be a bald-faced lie." - The Hairless Herald "I can't f**king see!" - Bob Learn more about your ad choices. Visit megaphone.fm/adchoices

The only word, besides bald, that has changed the trajectory of Distractible forever. Learn more about your ad choices. Visit megaphone.fm/adchoices

You better hope the Distractible Vault is fireproof, because there's a whole lot of fiery fury building up in this compilation! Check out shopify.com/distractible today Learn more about your ad choices. Visit megaphone.fm/adchoices

Bob and Mark motivate Wade to start his 2026 New Year's resolutions. Learn more about your ad choices. Visit megaphone.fm/adchoices

New year, new games, same bald, same 'naise. Learn more about your ad choices. Visit megaphone.fm/adchoices

The guys alphabetically bring out the Christmas cheer with classic tales of elf prison breaks, fast food snowmen, gigantic Santas, and a whole lot of everyone's favorite character: Ligolo. Reserve your ticket now at ironlung.com. Only in theaters January 30, 2026. Order now at ⁠pandaexpress.com⁠ or a store near you. Get set up quick and connect to their fast speeds. Learn more about your ad choices. Visit megaphone.fm/adchoices

The cephalopod confab returns as the guys expound upon what childhood games they'd like to see in their own version of Squid Game. Reserve your ticket now at ironlung.com. Only in theaters January 30, 2026. Order now at ⁠pandaexpress.com⁠ or a store near you. Learn more at uber.com/onourway Learn more about your ad choices. Visit megaphone.fm/adchoices

The ultimate test of endurance returns as Mark once again puts Bob and Wade to the linguistic test. Reserve your ticket now at ironlung.com. Only in theaters January 30, 2026. Order now at ⁠pandaexpress.com⁠ or a store near you. Visit www.rocketmoney.com/Distractible Learn more about your ad choices. Visit megaphone.fm/adchoices

Another year is almost at a close, but that doesn't mean that there isn't plenty of balding- I mean... BLESSINGS to acknowledge and short-uh... SURE things to look forward to in 2026. Reserve your ticket now at ironlung.com. Only in theaters January 30, 2026. Order now at ⁠pandaexpress.com⁠ or a store near you. Learn more at uber.com/onourway Learn more about your ad choices. Visit megaphone.fm/adchoices

The Distracti-menu specials for tonight are PB & J sandwiches and boiled eggs. And wait until you see what's for dessert... Reserve your ticket now at ironlung.com. Only in theaters January 30, 2026. Order now at ⁠pandaexpress.com⁠ or a store near you. Learn more at uber.com/onourway Learn more about your ad choices. Visit megaphone.fm/adchoices

No freak flags are flying around these parts, cause this is the baldest compilation in the wilderness! Order now at ⁠pandaexpress.com⁠ or a store near you. Learn more at uber.com/onourway Learn more about your ad choices. Visit megaphone.fm/adchoices

A compilation dedicated to some of Henry's most memorable mentions from the podcast. Rest In Peace, Henry. Order now at pandaexpress.com or a store near you. Learn more at uber.com/onourway Learn more about your ad choices. Visit megaphone.fm/adchoices

Alternate Title: "Wade Struggles For 45 Minutes." Get set up quick and connect to their fast speeds. Learn more at uber.com/onourway Learn more about your ad choices. Visit megaphone.fm/adchoices

Step aside Bob, there's a shiny new word-smith in town. Get set up quick and connect to their fast speeds. Learn more at uber.com/onourway Watch Video Now: https://spotify.link/distractible Learn more about your ad choices. Visit megaphone.fm/adchoices

Having a midlife crisis? Don't worry, the guys will make it all go away... Get set up quick and connect to their fast speeds. Learn more at uber.com/onourway Learn more about your ad choices. Visit megaphone.fm/adchoices

Listeners, you're responsible for this... Get set up quick and connect to their fast speeds. Learn more at uber.com/onourway Learn more about your ad choices. Visit megaphone.fm/adchoices

He's making a list, and checking it twice. He's gonna find out who's bald or lacks height. Get set up quick and connect to their fast speeds. Learn more at uber.com/onourway Learn more about your ad choices. Visit megaphone.fm/adchoices

It's time to relax with a copy of Penthouse Forum and plate of cannolis, because this compilation is all about the moon man himself, Mark. Get set up quick and connect to their fast speeds. Learn more at uber.com/onourway Learn more about your ad choices. Visit megaphone.fm/adchoices

If the "Distractible Vault" was a fridge, it would be stocked up with only the best bite-sized moments of our favorite dad, wordsmith, and mechanic, Bob. Get set up quick and connect to their fast speeds. Visit www.rocketmoney.com/Distractible Learn more about your ad choices. Visit megaphone.fm/adchoices

It's time once again to venture into "The Distractible Vault" to retrieve some of the most bald, car-less, and boat-loving moments of the King of Meat himself, Wade. Get set up quick and connect to their fast speeds. Learn more at uber.com/onourway Learn more about your ad choices. Visit megaphone.fm/adchoices

View and listen with caution, because no amount of discretion is guaranteed to keep frog swallowing mouse nut babies at bay... especially tonight... Experience all-out warfare. Battlefield 6 is available now. Get set up quick and connect to their fast speeds. Learn more about your ad choices. Visit megaphone.fm/adchoices

Hiii... Experience all-out warfare. Battlefield 6 is available now. Learn more at ⁠uber.com/onourway⁠ A Spotify Podcast. Learn more about your ad choices. Visit megaphone.fm/adchoices