Elite Rugby Banter

Rugby's Greatest Rivalry is finally over, and the Springboks have completed an historic inaugural series win over the All Blacks. Phil, Ant and Dick look back on the final test and the series as a whole, as South Africa once again found a way to close out a game that felt much closer on the scoreboard than it did on the field. The Springbok bench made another huge impact, the backline survived yet another round of injuries, and the panel discusses the impressive performances of players including Hanekom, Kurt-Lee Arendse, Morne van den Berg and Pieter-Steph du Toit. The boys then take a broader look at the series and ask just how big the gulf between the two teams really was. Despite New Zealand remaining competitive until the final stages of almost every test, South Africa controlled most of the important areas of the game — while the All Blacks' struggles at scrum, lineout and aerial ball remained throughout the tour. The panel also questions the increasingly defensive reaction from the New Zealand coaching staff, particularly their tendency to blame refereeing and other external factors rather than looking at their own performance. And then it's awards season. The boys pick their moment, try, tackle, flop, find and player of the series, with plenty of love for Jasper Wiese, Pieter-Steph du Toit, Malcolm Marx and Morne van den Berg — alongside a few less flattering awards for New Zealand, Angus Gardner and the tournament's rather questionable promotion. Plus the return of Richie Mo'unga, whether the All Blacks' hype got a little ahead of reality, the unfortunate state of the Rugby's Greatest Rivalry social media operation, and why three wins from four still somehow wasn't quite as comfortable as it should have been. Music by @monstroid, 80s TV Show.

The Greatest Rivalry left South African shores after a rollicking few weeks of crowds, controversy, and cracking rugby. Is Roigard just a new Perenara? Did the All Blacks find set piece loopholes to cope with Bok dominance? And will they cope in the US with the impending forced and unforced changes? A full house deliberates on that and much more. Music by @monstroid, 80s TV Show.

A low-flying plane was the least of Springbok fans worries (literally, it wasn’t a big deal, calm down) as the Boks managed to close out a needlessly nervy second Test to keep the rivalry tour alive. Malcolm Marx was adjusting his brake foot like an anxious Airlink backseat pilot, while the Boks’ kick-chase was the real air show on the day. What changed between the two Tests, and how do the boys see that playing out in Test 3? You’ll have to listen to find out. Music by @monstroid, 80s TV Show.

Denial. Anger. Bargaining. Depression. Acceptance. You’ll get it all on this week’s pod as Ant, Phil and Andy dissect the opening loss to the All Blacks. Each questionable call by refs and coaches is brought under the microscope as we process this shock result and try to look forward to the Cape of Good Hope (and possibly storms, in more ways than one). Is Pollard better employed from the bench? Can Marx go 80 again? Is PSDT ready to lead from the front and not from behind? Get your fix here at Elite Rugby Banter. Music by @monstroid, 80s TV Show.

Ant, Dick and Andy managed to gather around one microphone for once in a rare in-person pod. Yes, we covered all the expected stuff with the upcoming tour opener and a recap of the Bulls vs ABs match, but we think you’ll find our tangential rant about TMOs and technology the real highlight here… Boks by 10ish! Music by @monstroid, 80s TV Show.

We are two games into the RGR Tour (Phil has exhausted our free tokens for the full name) and the All Blacks have as many questions as they do answers. Cape Town was treated to a spectacle on and off the field against a second string side, while Durban was a damp downer against a more formidable lineup. The Boks out-gritted the Argentinians away but at the cost of their captain, while the All Blacks have also been losing men early. How will the two teams cope over the coming weeks? Who will be first choice come the Ellis Park opener on both sides? We try to channel our inner Rassie and we’re probably way off, but please have a listen anyway. Music by @monstroid, 80s TV Show.

The All Blacks are here! Confirmed by Ant in a plush Cape Town Virgin Active, the Kiwis have landed are preparing hard for the opening game against the Stormers this week. While the ABs sip cocktails in Clifton, a 26-strong Bok squad is quaffing Malbec in Buenos Aires, readying for their warm up against Argentina. There’s more antici…pation than a Rocky Horror number and more hype than an NZ rugby journo’s X account as we gear up for the Greatest Rivalry (TM CC LTD PBO). Ant, Andrew, Phil and Dick dive into the build-up to the first test, discussing whether the famous rivalry still deserves its billing and why these fixtures continue to stand apart from every other contest in international rugby. From history and respect to contrasting styles of play, the panel explores what makes South Africa versus New Zealand the benchmark by which every other rivalry is measured. Attention then turns to the rugby itself. Are the Springboks entering the series as deserved favourites? Has Rassie's side reached another level over the past year? And while Dave Rennie's All Blacks have shown encouraging signs, can they tighten up defensively against the most complete team in world rugby? The boys also discuss the contrasting approaches of Super Rugby and test rugby, the role of South Africa's franchises in preparing the All Blacks for what's to come, and why this series feels like a genuine measuring stick for both teams heading into the remainder of the international season. Plus predictions for the series, a look at the key individual battles, and why even in an era of expanded competitions and global tournaments, some matches simply matter more than others. Music by @monstroid, 80s TV Show.

There’s more than just bragging rights on the line when the Boks and All Blacks clash at Ellis Park in August - the winner takes the lineal world title, aka the Raeburn Shield. To discuss, we are joined this week by fellow rugby nerd and promoter of the Raeburn and Utrecht Shields, Dave Algie. Treat your ears to a fascinating deep dive into rugby history and a native Kiwi’s take on the upcoming Greatest Rivalry Tour - it’s a good one. Raeburn Shield Link: https://www.raeburnandutrechtshields.com/ Music by @monstroid, 80s TV Show.

Ant, Phil and Andy mark the Nations Championship midterms as they recap the first three rounds. France and South Africa have emerged as clear favourites, but there are some interesting performance arcs and player selection discussions to unpack. Are France in France a bigger threat to Boks ascendancy than three home games against NZ? Is Japan managing to break their reliance on foreign players? Is Scotland really the third best team in the world as Rassie reckons? And what of the flailing Fijians and irate Italians? Find out on this week’s pod. Music by @monstroid, 80s TV Show.

While referees and commentators stumble over the interpretation of the laws and player roles, our panel of three gives more daylight on the latest rugby than Paul de Villiers in a Bok turnover. From the Baby Boks to the B-team, it was an action packed weekend of international rugby. This was a bumper episode - make sure to use the full shot clock to get it all in. We unpack South Africa's victory over Scotland and Rassie's post-match suggestion that the Scots could now be the third-best side in the world. Is there really a changing of the guard happening at the top of international rugby? Or are people suffering from remarkably short memories after the Springboks comfortably dispatched both France and New Zealand the last time they met? Elsewhere, Ireland's trip to "Japan" sparks one of the biggest off-field talking points of the tournament. Why were Japan forced to give up a home fixture? Should teams be allowed to dictate where they play? And after yet another compromise in the competition's opening year, the panel jokingly arrives at one obvious solution: kick Ireland out of rugby. Australia once again show flashes before fading against a stacked French side, prompting discussion around Joe Schmidt's tenure, whether Dave Rennie deserved more time, and just how frightening France's depth has become. With Jalibert, Ntamack, Dupont and a seemingly endless conveyor belt of talent, are Les Bleus now the only nation capable of matching the Springboks for squad depth? And why does Ant love the Wallabies so much? Plus the All Blacks' "pump and dump" approach to player selection, foreign-born internationals popping up in unexpected places, and why having too many good players isn't always the worst problem to have. Music by @monstroid, 80s TV Show.

The opening weekend of the Nations Championship is in the books, and one thing became abundantly clear: when the Springboks hit top gear, nobody else is quite operating at the same level. Phil and Ant unpack South Africa's convincing victory over England, from the blistering opening quarter to another dominant second-half display. Damian Willemse reminded everyone why he's one of the world's premier fullbacks, Jasper Wiese continued to make life miserable for opposition forwards, and the Springbok bench once again proved why it's the envy of international rugby. There's also discussion around Paul de Villiers' impressive opportunity, Kurt-Lee Arendse's growing collection of yellow cards, and whether the Boks have finally found the perfect balance between experimenting and winning. Elsewhere, Australia push Ireland all the way but come up just short, raising as many positives as questions. Is the Wallabies' rebuilding job further along than the results suggest? And are Ireland still searching for the side that dominated world rugby just a few seasons ago? The boys also look at Dave Rennie's All Blacks after an entertaining victory over France. Has New Zealand already started to rediscover its identity? Just how influential is Cam Roigard becoming? And does Will Jordan's remarkable try-scoring record tell the full story of just how good he really is? Plus, England's puzzling selections, why development cycles matter more than many fans realise, and whether the gap between South Africa and the chasing pack is currently bigger than the scoreboards suggest. Music by @monstroid, 80s TV Show.

The Nations Championship is finally here, and with a brand-new tournament comes one very important question: what actually counts as success? Ant and Phil kick things off by looking at South Africa's campaign. Is three wins the minimum expectation for the Springboks? Which combinations still need answers before the business end of the season? And with Rassie continuing to build depth across the squad, just how much experimentation is too much when silverware is on the line? The boys then work their way around the rest of the tournament, setting realistic expectations for every side. England's lofty ambitions come under scrutiny, France head to New Zealand with a genuine chance of causing problems, there's plenty of sympathy for Fiji, who once again won't get the opportunity to play their home fixtures on home soil, and can the Wallabies take a big scalp from Ireland or France. Attention then turns across the Tasman, where Dave Rennie has some fascinating selection calls to make for his All Blacks side. Should the Hurricanes provide the backbone of the team? Is Ruben Love ready for the biggest stage? And after one particularly spicy internet take, the panel spends far longer than expected debating whether Will Jordan might just be the most overrated All Black of the modern era. Plus predictions for the opening weekend, discussion around the changing balance of power in world rugby, and why this year's Nations Championship could tell us a lot about where every major nation really stands. Music by @monstroid, 80s TV Show.

The Springboks have played, SA A have capped everyone with a pulse, and apparently the All Blacks just aren't scary anymore. Phil, Ant and Adam unpack the SA A victory over Zimbabwe, the rise of the latest batch of under-20 stars, and why Rassie's second-team experiments might be one of the smartest things he has has done. There are flowers for the youngsters, sympathy for the injured, and widespread agreement that getting yourself sent off for tackling someone in mid-air is generally a bad idea. The boys also dive into the Barbarians match, where the rugby was entertaining but the ticket prices and the poor attendance were significantly less so. Is South African rugby charging too much? Does a full stadium matter more than maximum revenue? And how many times can people complain about the Play Cup before it becomes a tradition? Elsewhere, the Bulls once again discover that URC finals are not particularly fun, Quan Horn survives his flyhalf experiment, the Hurricanes put the Chiefs through an industrial shredder, and the panel asks the question nobody would have dared ask ten years ago: exactly how many All Blacks would make the Springbok starting line up? Apparently not as many as you might think. Music by @monstroid, 80s TV Show.

Springbok season is finally here, and Rassie has wasted no time giving us something to argue about. Phil and Ant unpack the first Bok and SA A squads of the year, from a backline full of baby Boks to the surprise selection of Quan Horn at flyhalf. Is SA A becoming rugby's version of passport control? Which youngsters are most likely to force their way into the conversation? And just how excited should we be about Siyaya, Pead, and the rest of the next generation? Elsewhere, the Bulls prepare for another trip to Dublin and another crack at Leinster, while Super Rugby reaches its climax with the Hurricanes and Chiefs set to battle it out for the title. The boys also take a brief detour into the Barbarians squad, questionable football red cards, and the terrifying possibility of American-style ad breaks making their way into rugby. Springbok season is back, the rugby calendar is packed, and Ant somehow still finds time to complain about scheduling and soccer. Nature is healing. Music by @monstroid, 80s TV Show.

Another month has passed in the ERB rugby universe, and finally the gang have reached the knock-outs. Not them, but at least the Stormers. Andy and Ant, who are Phil and Dick-less this week, speak about the Stormers just being themselves in throwing away a winnable game against Leinster, and praise the Bulls' grit at Murrayfield (though Pollard really shanked them...). They also chat Super Rugby, Tony Brown having the best life plan 18 moths out from the World Cup, and more.

It’s the young guns (which excludes our panelists, sadly) who take centre stage this episode, from Zekhetelo and the Boogeyman at the Sharks to the Baby Boks and even LBB at Bordeaux. U20s, URC, Super Rugby, and Currie Cup all coming to you courtesy of the boys at ERB. Music by @monstroid, 80s TV Show.

It’s a full house for the first time in forever as we cast our minds back to Six Nations last round excitement, as well as the ongoing Super Rugby Pacific and URC competitions. South African sides remain firmly in contention for playoffs in Europe and at home, and the game appears to be in rude health judging by the unpredictable nature up north. What a time to be a rugby fan! Ant goes deep on old Sharks rosters while also talking up the new-gen Irishmen. Dick is feeling bubbly in the jacuzzi and gets technical on bonus point standards of deviation. Phil gets us back on track with a level-headed look at the latest URC and Super Rugby tables and cup fixtures. Andy drinks whisky and toasts Scottish success despite their mediocre bronze medal showing (classic Scottish fan) while diagnosing Sacha with Gelantitis! Music by @monstroid, 80s TV Show.

The lads unpack a massive rugby weekend featuring Super Rugby chaos, Blitzboks success, and one of the most entertaining Six Nations rounds in years. We start down south with a Super Rugby check-in after four rounds: the Chiefs quietly looking strong, the Brumbies stumbling late against the Reds, the Crusaders flirting with panic mode, and the Force discovering that scoring points is easy… defending them is not. We also touch on Rugby Australia’s latest league convert and what the looming World Cup might mean for player movement. A quick pit stop through Sevens (with the Blitzboks topping the standings) leads into the big news from New Zealand: Dave Rennie vs Jamie Joseph for the All Blacks job and what each candidate could bring to a slightly messy Kiwi setup. A special word for the Lions - 25/26 South African Shield Champions! What an achievement. Then it’s time for the main course: Six Nations madness. • Italy shock England for the first time as selection roulette, brain-dead penalties, and general chaos sink Borthwick’s men. • Scotland produce one of their best performances in years to hammer France before a late French fightback. • Ireland grind past Wales while Wales continue their slow rebuild. Along the way we discuss the brilliance of Menoncello, the resurgence of Kyle Steyn, whether Ireland have quietly regressed to “occasionally good” territory, and why England’s selection decisions might have cost them the tournament. Finally, we preview a wild final weekend where France, Ireland, and Scotland can all still win the Six Nations—and we ask the real question: is there still a way England could somehow end up with the wooden spoon? Music by @monstroid, 80s TV Show.

Ant is back from faraway lands with a scouting report from Georgia (spoiler: they don’t know much about SA rugby… except that we’re good), and the boys dive into a proper Six Nations mid-tournament temperature check. We unpack three weeks of Six Nations chaos: France looking like the only adults in the room, Ireland nearly getting Italy'd in Dublin, Scotland doing Scotland things (again), and England discovering that a 12-game streak doesn’t stop you getting put to the sword. Along the way we argue about drifting passes, TMOs who simply can’t help themselves, and whether gold boots are basically a cursed captaincy announcement. Then it’s a quick whip around the globe: SA’s new U20/U23 Currie Cup bridge (and the return of curtain-raiser nostalgia), early Super Rugby weirdness (Brumbies statement win, Crusaders in the mud, and the usual “it’s early” cop-outs), URC’s return, and Varsity Cup’s latest mad-scientist scoring rule. Also the Lions did the double over the Sharks! Music by @monstroid, 80s TV Show.

After a quick detour to the URC, Ant, Phil and Andy preview the upcoming Six Nations. Will England and Italy's rises supersede Ireland and Scotland's golden (yet greying) generations? Will Dupont carry France or will he be lost to the Winter Olympics? And will Wales...nah, they won't. That and more in this week's episode. Music by @monstroid, 80s TV Show.

Phil, Ant, and Andy are back after a festive break to review the state of play in the URC and European Cup rugby. Also, what's going on in New Zealand and when is Razor going to swap Christchurch for Durban?? They also play adjudicators for the SA Rugby Awards after the shortlists were released this week. Who is the ERB SA Player of the Year? Moment of the Year? Coach? Have a listen and find out. Music by @monstroid, 80s TV Show.

It's the festive season, which is when we find out who has been naughty or nice, or in ERB's world which teams had good years, average years, and a season to forget. Ant, Phil, and a returning Andy have a look at standout players and moments for each of the top 12 sides. Oh, yes, we also address the extremely disappointing Eben incident and the needless Wales rout, while also touching on a tremendous Stormers result and a surprising Jukskei derby. Music by @monstroid, 80s TV Show.

Strap in for a bumper episode of Elite Rugby Banter as Ant and Phil break down a truly bizarre and brutal Test match in Dublin. The Springboks were undeniably dominant against Ireland, so why did it feel so close? We dive into the FIVE Irish cards, the scrum carnage, the bizarre refereeing decisions, and the James Ryan incident that left us speechless. Then, we shift gears to crown the best of the best. With the international season wrapped up, we unveil our official Elite Rugby Banter World XV of the Year. Who made the cut in our entirely objective and completely undisputed dream team? There are shock inclusions, controversial snubs, and a healthy dose of banter as we debate the standout players from 1 to 15. It’s all here: analysis of the Boks' tour, the state of the All Blacks, England's rise, and our prestigious end-of-year awards. You won't want to miss it! Music by @monstroid, 80s TV Show.

This week on Elite Rugby Banter, we unpack a weekend of rugby that felt like it was scripted by a mischievous referee with a flair for theatre. The Boks beat Italy, but the real drama was in the card deck — with Eddie Jones still talking about “intent” like it’s a legal thriller. KLA ghosted again, Moodie’s defence was more interpretive dance than tackle technique, but Dwilly was electric and Manie continued to Manie with reckless charm. Pollard? Somewhere between solid and spectral. If you’re not betting on Bok 9s to score, you hate free money. And Rassie’s bench moves? Chef’s kiss. Across the channel, England stunned the All Blacks and now we’re all asking: are they actually good? Is this real? Who’s in the top five now — and does anyone agree? BBBB caught some heat, but the real fire was in the discourse. Ireland beat Australia, but only the wrong Aussies shone. Ireland looked better, but was that just because Australia are now a rugby ghost town? Scotland lost to Argentina, and surely Tooney’s seat is now lava. Meanwhile, Argentina continue to “prove” they’re a top team — despite having done so for five years, three World Cup semis, and wins over basically everyone. Can we retire the “on their day” trope? And yes, Japan played Wales. It’s a week of hot takes, cold facts, and rugby chaos — and we’re here to stir it all with a crooked referee’s whistle and a wink. Music by @monstroid, 80s TV Show.

If French rugby is fine wine, the Boks uncorked it, chugged it straight from the bottle, and smashed the glass on the way out. The Springboks have once again marched into Paris like uninvited houseguests, stomping mud across the carpets, smashing the crockery, and pocketing a few heirlooms for good measure. France looked overrated, outmuscled, and utterly unable to dent the Bok defence, while the refereeing circus gave us scrums that made no sense, a red card that raised eyebrows, and yellows that felt more like lottery tickets. Rassie’s substitutions were bold, Siya’s leadership was immense, and Esterhuizen looked every bit the golden key to unlock this side. Sasha or Manie — who’s really the man (hint, it's still Pollard)? Meanwhile, the 9s are bringing the heat, but KLA might not be it. Beyond Paris, the Northern Hemisphere chorus of “we’re undercooked” rang out again, conveniently forgetting that the shoe is on the other foot every June. Italy toppled Australia, leaving us wondering if Joe Schmidt’s fire has fizzled. Scotland spooked themselves against New Zealand in what quickly became the DMac show. England scraped past Fiji, though the islanders could easily have stolen it, with refereeing once again in the spotlight. Wales, poor Wales, were left licking wounds after Argentina gave them another bruising reminder of reality. And in the background, World Cup qualification permutations rumble on: Namibia struggling, Belgium proving they’re more than just chips. It was a weekend of broken narratives, hot takes, and Southern Hemisphere swagger, and we’re here to stir the pot with all the banter you can handle. Music by @monstroid, 80s TV Show

Tadgh Beirne’s red card lit the fuse this weekend, and while most of us were still debating intent versus accident, BBBB was already pledging his undying defence of the man. We ask whether a Barrett‑less All Blacks might actually be the better version. Meanwhile, SaFM continues to smoulder — is it still flames or just smoke and mirrors? Two aerial 50/50s had everyone split down the middle, Kolbe’s solidity was put under the microscope, and the big questions loom: Is Quan Horn already a better bet than Andries Coetzee, should Pat Lambie still be the Boks’ first‑choice 10 (yes, Ant went there), and was Faz completely mad to back Doris? Music by @monstroid, 80s TV Show

We are 5 weeks into the URC and have 5 weeks of Springboks rugby ahead - it's the perfect time for a stock take. Do the Boks have what it takes to go 5 from 5? Are the Stormers as good as they seem? Did the Citing Commissioner set an extremely dangerous precedent? The answer to at least one of those questions is a yes. Listen in to find out what the guys think.

After a brief review of the URC second round and the last of the Rugby Champs (Bokke back to back!), each of our four regulars delivers the end-of-term report on their allotted team. Listen in to find out more about James O'Connor's haircut, why Jordie Barrett may have resurrected Camille Chat's international career, Ant's Nic White impression, and Kolbe's sudden senile onset. Music by @monstroid, 80s TV Show.

Strap in for a chaotic episode as Phil, Ant, and Rich attempt to analyse the un-analysable. The Springboks' win over Argentina had everything: 97 points, 12 tries, a hattrick, a bizarre drop-goal attempt from your own in-goal, and a coming-of-age masterclass from Sacha Feinberg-Mngomezulu. We break down the madness, the genius, and the sheer lunacy of it all. Plus, we cover the Bledisloe Cup, the URC kick-off (Stormers good, Lions bad!), the Women's World Cup final and why a certain Welsh analyst has got it all wrong about the Boks. Pure, unadulterated rugby banter. Music by @monstroid, 80s TV Show.

This week, Dick blows the whistle on the TRC’s scheduling shenanigans, accusing them of high tackle interference with the Women’s RWC and AFL finals. It’s a calendar clash of titanic proportions, and someone’s getting yellow-carded. We scrum down on the age-old debate: Six Nations or TRC—which competition reigns supreme? Spoiler: it’s less “crown jewel” and more “jewel heist,” depending on your hemisphere. The Lions did a thing—celebrated like Currie Cup champions at 80 minutes, then promptly remembered they’re allergic to silverware. We unpack the collapse, the curse, and the cruel optimism. Meanwhile, New Zealand rugby might be going full haka-flameout, and Australia’s eyeing the unthinkable double— breaking both the Eden Park and Bledisloe hoodoes. Is it a golden age or just fool’s gold? Plus: the URC kicks off and our draft preview goes off the rails faster than a Bulls fan at altitude. Expect botched picks, bruised egos, and a few players who were drafted purely for their haircuts. Music by @monstroid, 80s TV Show.

What a weekend of rugby... The Wallabies and Argentina got our morning's off to a great start with a highly entertaining clash, followed up by what was one of the all-time great halves of rugby from the Springboks and a record defeat for the All Blacks. The Springbok Women then closed out the double up with an inspired debut in the World Cup knockouts, ultimately falling to the superior Black Ferns. Oh, and the Lions used their URC players to cheat their way to yet another Currie Cup final. Music by @monstroid, 80s TV Show.

Rain and the ref seem to be common excuses going around the South African water coolers this week, but in all honesty the Boks had only themselves to blame for gifting Ardie Savea a victory in his 100th Test. While the Springbok men failed to create history, the women will write a new chapter as they appear in their first ever RWC quarter final against New Zealand this week, lining up a tasty Kiwi doubleheader for Bok fans. Andy is optimistic this week about Rassie's brow-raising, youthful selections for the second Test, while Phil and Ant are more pragmatic. Perhaps even more gruelling than dissecting a Springbok loss is having to say nice things about the Wallabies for the third episode in a row. Yuck. Music by @monstroid, 80s TV Show.

Aseza Hele, Libbie Janse van Rensburg, Nadine Roos, Nolusindiso Booi... A special generation of Springbok women have made history with a first ever appearance in the RWC knockouts. Ant and Andy revel in the green glow and recount this historic moment. The Springbok men also feature, with a recap of the Wallabies win and a nervous note on the upcoming game-of-the-year against the All Blacks in fortress Eden Park. Music by @monstroid, 80s TV Show.

Well, nobody saw that coming. The Springboks spontaneously combusted as the Wallabies ran in wonder try after wonder try at Ellis Park to take a famous victory. But, the pod believes a victory next week is still the most likely outcome as some mitigating factors emerge. Perhaps some hard but necessary lessons learned in this shock defeat? Music by @monstroid, 80s TV Show.

Short answer, no. The consensus is that even Ireland is better than the B&I Lions. The real question is Argentina better than the Lions? They beat them. But England B beat Argentina. So are England B better than the Lions? And are England B better than England A? Is Maro Itoje the problem? If you asked Andre Piardi, he'd probably say "si". But then, after this week's controversy, do we trust anything he says? This week's episode isn't sponsored, but Panados might have helped with the headaches. For Tizzano also. Although he wasn't hit in the head. Or was he? Also, Currie Cup! Go Golden Lions! Music by @monstroid, 80s TV Show.

The Boks have wrapped up their on-field preparations for the Rugby Championship with a testing but worthy win over the physical Georgians. All that remains is to sit back and watch the dull, light beer clashes Down Under while Rassie fine tunes his first choices. On the domestic front, the Currie Cup gets going with some of our u20 World Champions in the mix, and the Imbokodo prep for the Black Ferns. Music by @monstroid, 80s TV Show.

OG Adam is back for a guest appearance this week and drops a few hot takes for good measure. Is Henco van Wyk the Marco van Staden of centres? We're not convinced, but we're here for it anyway. Jasper sees red as the Boks run over the top of Italy, NZ get their groove back, and the Lions loom large for the Wallabies as the first Test draws nearer. Music by @monstroid, 80s TV Show.

What do Steve and Mike Wosniak have in common? Well, it's not rugby as we find out in this mythbusting ERB episode. There was a lot of rugby to cover with the international season underway. The Boks managed to keep down an unexpectedly strong Italian espresso with no help from the bomb squad (cue the fireworks). New Zealand nearly choked on a C-grade baguette while Fiji couldn't quite stomach an undercooked kangaroo steak. We expected a mauling from the Lions but it was with a hiss rather than a roar that they overcame the Tahs. This and more in a bumper episode from Ant, Phil and Andy. Music by @monstroid, 80s TV Show.

The Boks sent the BaaBaas packing but not without a few boxes of South African wine. Rassie started the season doing Rassie things with Esterhuizen playing flank, while Kolbe continued to embarrass opposition but not as much as O'Mahony getting swindled like Eskom buying an exorbitant dummy from SAFM. In other news, the Junior Sprintboks (sic) sped their way to a dominant scoreline against Aus, and the B&I Lions Forced their way to 50 in Western Australian to kickstart their tour Down Under. Music by @monstroid, 80s TV Show.

Ant, Phil and Andy recap the two season finales for URC and Super Rugby as well as the non-Test between the B&I Lions (minus Leinster) and Argentina (minus most of their first choice French clubbers). The Lions head off to Australia with more questions than answers but Ant like a good Brit thinks this might be a good thing. The Super Clubs of Leinster and the Crusaders add more trophies to their storied histories, and the Bulls bullies get taught a lesson at Choke, I mean Croke, Park. Meanwhile, attention turns to the Test window, with an appetizer in the form of the BaaBaas in Cape Town who have already run up significant bills at Caprice in Clifton if rumours are to be believed.

From the pressure cooker (kicker?) of Kingsmead to the doldrums of Scotstoun and the predictable fortresses of Loftus and the Aviva, the URC quarter finals are now behind us. One South African side will appear in a fourth consecutive final, but who will it be? Will wily Willie outwit the wing-center Hooker? The Champions Cup final was a humdinger, but was Pollock a pillock or a Saint? Finally, will the Antipodean fans be able to grasp the inanity of the Super Rugby Pacific knockout (kinda, but not really?) round? (Hint: we struggled.) Have a listen to find out. PS. A big congrats to Ant and Phil, winners of our SRP and URC draft leagues, respectively! Music by @monstroid, 80s TV Show.

Hey! Remember us? It's been a while, but that means there's plenty to talk about. URC and Super Rugby Pacific approach their business ends while the announcement of a Lions tour gives us plenty to chew on. Is the fate of the Crusaders tied to Will Jordan's knee? Is Mack Hansen injured or is it just a conspiracy? And why is he banned on Hinge? Is Andy older than a potato? Find out here. Music by @monstroid, 80s TV Show.

Is Hooker a hooker? Is Tizzano a hooker? What about Henco? Or Marnus? Spoiler: probably only the last one. But listen anyway to find out. It has been a while! Ant, Phil and Andy quickly recap the lost episode wrapping up the Six Nations before turning to the tail end of the URC and a highly entertaining Super Rugby Pacific edition. Music by @monstroid, 80s TV Show.

A very special in-person episode was recorded for your pleasure, seeing a return of not only Andrew but Ant's rants and Super Rugby Pacific. The reunited trio look ahead to the rugby extravaganza that is SRP, asking the deep questions like who can stop the Blues, can the Crusaders get any worse and will all of the Australians improve without the Rebels. We also look back on the first two weeks of the 6 Nations (Rugby's Greatest Championship™) as Ant lets his feelings known strongly about their claim to be the best and at all of the big news from the rugby world including the inevitable demise of one Warren Gatland. Music by @monstroid, 80s TV Show.

Better late than never! Ant has a lot to get off his chest after a couple of months away. Joined by Phil, the duo assess the state of play for the South African teams in the URC and Champions/Challenge Cup before diving into a 6 Nations preview. Can the Sharks go all the way in the URC? What is wrong with the Stormers? Will the Bulls and Lions make their games in hand count? And will Wales finally break their losing streak? All these questions answered and more! Music by @monstroid, 80s TV Show.

The Boks have dominated the Player of the Year nominees, but will World Rugby conspire to select another Irish backrower? Phil and Andy launch the #JusticeForOx campaign as they ask whether rugby will always let props eat cake without proper recognition. The duo shine the spotlight on the latest fixtures like Stade de France did on the haka, and then sidestep like Kolbe to consider the impending Cardiff feast. Music by @monstroid, 80s TV Show.

The former colonies dominated as the South swept aside the imperialist North in the Autumn Nations Series as cocky fans' egos swelled more than Kolisi's eye socket. Bok supporters are still unhappy with four tries to none, while Will Jordan keeps advancing on Dougie Howlett's record. Australia get a famous win despite being a Schmidt team, and Fiji hand Wales off in entertaining fashion. Lots to talk about in this week's bumper episode of Elite Rugby Banter. Strap-in for a bum-per episode this week. Music by @monstroid, 80s TV Show.

Is Marcus Smith the Messiah? Or was it a bad Ford to cross. Are Scotland the real deal, or are Fiji just anti W(h)ales? Can anyone stop Sititi or Telea (spoiler, you'll find out on Friday). The gang (sans Bird) run the rule over what each team (including Kenya) would deem a success for the autumn/spring/November/end of year tour. Music by @monstroid, 80s TV Show.

Dick takes a swing at hosting as the team recaps the URC progress of the South African teams. Listen in as the misinformed mispronounce and sometimes miss the point, unlike David (Richard no T) Kriel against Benetton. To sweeten things up, dessert is served in the form of a quick preview of the upcoming international fixtures as well.

The Boks sign off on a wildly successful Rugby Championship campaign in emphatic style in Mbombela, while the All Blacks heap further misery on an admittedly Schmidt Wallaby team. Then, in the URC, the Lions and Bulls enjoy the comforts of home while the Sharks and Stormers succumb to the frigid northern climes. Has Ox done enough to be the first prop to win World Rugby Player of the Year? Will all four nominees be Springboks? Will the Stormers ever win overseas? Find out in this week's episode. Music by @monstroid, 80s TV Show.