PODCAST · education
Having It A.L.L.
by Matthew Bivens
Welcome to Having It A.L.L., the podcast that flips the script on what it means to “have it all” in life. I’m Matthew Bivens, your host and friend, and I’m inviting you to join me in conversations designed to help you radically shift your confidence, self worth, and clarity. In order to create new results in your life - whether that’s in your relationships, your health, your money, your family or your life’s purpose - you must make new decisions and build new habits. This podcast will not only deliver the lessons and action items that will help you move the needle in your life, but also share the vulnerable and honest truth about the challenges of working to improve and ultimately master yourself. Each breakdown can lead to breakthrough, and we cover it all on this podcast. Personal development is not an easy road, but you can create meaningful change that lasts. Let’s do it together one choice at a time. Tune in each week and see that it’s not only possible to have it all, but that
Episodes
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Relationship Misconceptions That Are Making You Unhappy with Sarah Bivens
Are your relationship beliefs actually creating the connection you want—or quietly sabotaging it? In this honest conversation, Sarah and I unpack the subtle, sneaky beliefs that shape how we show up in love—and often lead to frustration, resentment, and emotional burnout. These are the...
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The Top 5 Regrets of the Dying (And How to Make Sure They’re Not Yours)
What will you regret when your time is up? In this confronting and thought-provoking episode, I explore the five most common regrets people share as they approach the end of their lives—insights captured by palliative care nurse Bronnie Ware after years of supporting individuals in their final...
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Codependency and Unhealthy Attachments In Relationships
How healthy would you say your attachment is with your partner? In today's episode I share an email from a listener who opens up on her relationship attachment. I appreciate her vulnerability and courage in this one because it gives us all a chance to heal and grow. STRUGGLING WITH CONSISTENCY?...
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Feeling Stressed or Anxious? This One Question Can Instantly Stop Your Stress and Overwhelm
How stressed out do you feel right now? Have you dealt with stress earlier today or this week? We all experience stress, it's part of life. But not everybody relates to stress in the same way. You have your own go-to methods for dealing with your stress, and some are more effective than others....
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Healing My Wounded Inner Child
What does it mean to heal your inner child? The process of growing up into adulthood is filled with many impactful events, some empowering and others not. As children, we are experience life with little to no filter, leaving us open to experience hurts, fears, angers and traumas with an extreme...
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Avoiding Burnout, Business Planning and Content Creation: Answering Your Life Questions Part 3
Ever feel like the more you achieve, the emptier you feel? You’re hitting goals, growing your business, and pushing hard—but the burnout is real. In this raw and real episode, I answer your powerful questions about how to avoid burnout, build a meaningful business, and create content that…
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Fasting Isn’t About Food...It’s About Emotional Mastery
What if the reason you keep breaking your commitments isn’t about willpower, but emotions? This episode dives into how emotions like stress, frustration, and apathy quietly hijack your habits, your follow-through, and your sense of integrity. I’m sharing how a simple weekly fasting practice…
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The 6 Steps I Use to Get Unstuck When I Feel Lost, Unclear or Unmotivated
Ever feel like your life should feel amazing, but inside... you’re just stuck? You’ve got the job, the family, the “success”—but confidence is shaky, motivation is MIA, and the truth is you’re scared you’re wasting your potential. In this episode, I respond to a listener email from “Jim,” a man...
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Who’s Watching You Quit On Yourself (And Learning From Your Example)?
Who are you unconsciously giving permission to quit on themselves? In this episode, I share a powerful story from a recent Play Camp where one small decision to avoid discomfort triggered a ripple effect of playing small. We unpack what it means to be a watcher—and how your fear (or your courage)...
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How to Turn Stress Into Power (Using Nothing But Your Workout)
What if your next workout could help you stay calm in a fight, show up powerfully at work, or stop spiraling when life hits hard? In this episode, I break down how to use exercise as a training ground for transforming your relationship with stress. I’m not talking about just getting abs or…
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Is Your Life Feeling Out Of Control? Here Are 2 Simple Ways To Get Your Sense Of Stability Back
Feeling like life’s got the upper hand? When everything around you feels unpredictable—your relationships, your career, your body—it’s easy to spiral into anxiety, frustration, or helplessness. But here’s the truth: you’re never truly powerless. In this episode, I take you into a personal season…
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The Life-Changing Magic of Just Going for It
When was the last time you stood at the edge of something, heart pounding and stomach knotted, knowing you could either stay safe… or jump? In this episode, I share the story of an early morning hike with a friend that turned into one of those rare and real "f**k it!" moments. This story is more...
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When Life Doesn’t Go Your Way, Listen Closer
Ever found yourself staring at a situation thinking, “This isn’t what I wanted”? What if it’s exactly what you needed? In this episode, I share a powerful and unexpected conversation with a stranger that turned into a divine download—and cracked open a deeper truth about fatherhood, faith, and...
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The Invisible Weight You’re Carrying Through Your Life
What happens to your body when your thoughts turn on you? In today’s episode, I walk you through two real-life moments from the gym that illustrate just how powerful your inner dialogue truly is. One man dropped the weight the moment fear crept in. One woman nearly fainted from the emotional…
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The Game You’re Playing Is Working - Even If It’s Wrecking You
What game are you playing so well… it’s keeping you stuck? If you feel like life isn’t working, pause before you call it failure. You’re winning. You’ve just been unconsciously training for the wrong game. This episode isn’t here to fluff you up or give you a participation ribbon. It’s here to…
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The Real Reason Your Breakthrough Keeps Dodging You
We all say we want change—more peace, better health, deeper connection, stronger boundaries. But the results we crave only show up when our effort matches our expectations. In this episode, I explore the invisible gap between what we say we want and what we’re actually doing to create it.…
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The Real Test of Growth: Will You Choose Integrity Over Approval?
What do you do when your values get tested—and the cost of staying true is real? This episode is about the moments that reveal who you actually are—not who you say you are. Not the version that shows up in your journal, on your vision board, or in your next coaching session. But the version that...
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7 Must Haves For Stellar Relationships (They Are Not What You Think)
Ever find yourself stuck in the same kind of relationship drama—even when you swore it’d be different this time? In this episode, I’m breaking down seven relationship must-haves that go way deeper than communication skills or love languages. These are the tools I wish someone had handed me years...
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Why Self Love Feels Off (Even When You’re Doing All the “Right” Things)
You hit the gym, eat clean, take the solo date—but deep down, something still feels off. Why? In this episode, I unpack a version of self love you don’t hear about often: the kind rooted in standards. Not surface-level habits or nice-sounding affirmations—but the real, gritty way you build self...
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STOP Ignoring This Feedback, If You Want Your Life To Change
Are you filtering out the very thing that could break your patterns? You say you want to grow. You say you’re ready for the next level. But when feedback hits—do you lean in, or get defensive? In this episode, we break down the three essential types of feedback that shape your evolution. I’m...
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The "Be-Do-Have" Paradigm And The Simple Mindset Shift That Will Realign Your Life
Ever feel like you're doing all the right things but still not getting what you want? That’s where the Be-Do-Have paradigm comes in. Most people have it backwards. They think once they have the success, time, love, or clarity—they’ll do the right things and finally be who they want to be. But...
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Stop Drifting—The 5 W’s That Realign Your Life
Are you really living... or just reacting? In this episode, I’m handing you a tool for deep, no-BS introspection: the 5 W’s of Radical Self Awareness. This isn’t some surface-level journaling prompt. This is a mirror. A spotlight. A call-out and a call-forward—all in one. You'll explore: Who is...
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The Truth About Balance: Why You’re Out of Alignment (And Don’t Know It)
What if the reason life feels so off... is because your wheels are out of balance? In this episode, I introduce you to a powerful framework called The Body Vehicle—a tool I learned through the YourDay Balance Game that completely shifted how I understand (and live) life balance. Here’s the idea…
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8 Habits That Make You Unshakable In Life, Love and Leadership
Are you showing up like the person you say you want to be? Or are you still stuck in habits that keep you in survival mode—burnt out, resentful, and playing small? In this episode, I’m joined by my powerhouse wife Sarah—Balance Lifestyle Coach, Personal Trainer, and walking embodiment of what I...
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"You Have To Move Your Feet": A Story About Seeing The Beauty In All Of Life's Circumstances with Robert Monroe
Today’s guest is a father to three daughters, a husband to a beautiful wife, friend to myself and so many others, and an economist by profession. His name is Robert Monroe, and if you met him in person, the first thing you’d probably notice is his smile. He’s got one of those ear to ear smiles…
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The Personal Development Trap: Why Chasing Growth Might Be Holding You Back
When’s the last time you stopped to actually see your growth? Not the goal you're chasing. Not the next version of you that you think you should be. I'm talking about a real, honest pause—to look back and say, “Wow, I’ve come a long way.” In this episode, I unpack a few powerful moments where I...
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The Quiet Habit That’s Killing Your Self Confidence And Self Trust
What if the real reason you’re stuck isn’t a lack of time or willpower—but a lack of trust in yourself? Every broken promise to yourself chips away at your confidence—and you don’t even realize it’s happening. From missed workouts to late-night scrolling instead of journaling, it’s not about...
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The 3 Mindsets That Have Transformed My Confidence, Relationships and Wealth
In today's episode I'm sharing with you three mindsets that have been the biggest catalysts for my personal transformation over the past 4 years. From my self confidence, to the quality of my relationships, to my ability to attract money and create wealth, these 3 things have been the spark for...
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You’re In The Fire—Here's How You Don’t Lose Your Center
What do you lean on when life blindsides you, again and again—and you’re too tired to pretend you’ve got it all together? When life throws you into the fire—when the hits keep coming and you’re running on fumes—it’s easy to spiral, snap, or shut down. In this episode, I’m handing you two powerful...
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The Consequences Of Brutal Honesty
There can be a tremendous amount of fear and anxiety associated with honesty, despite the freeing impact that complete honesty can have on ourselves and in our relationships. This episode was inspired by an article I read titled "The Pros And Cons Of Brutal Honesty". The following quote from the...
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7 Gratitude Truths That’ll Rewire Your Mind (This Will Change How You See Everything)
What if gratitude isn’t what you think — and what you’ve been taught is keeping you stuck? In this episode, I’m breaking down 7 powerful gratitude truths that will flip the way you think about appreciation, happiness, and abundance. This isn’t your typical gratitude list — we’re going deeper....
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The Danger Of Seeking Work-Life Balance
In this episode I tear apart the concept of “work-life balance” and explain why it’s dangerous, leads to unhealthy living, and why we have to replace it with a healthy and sustainable construct. We’re all familiar with the idea of work-life balance. It’s a phrase and concept we’ve been fed for...
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How To Melt Your Fears Like Butter
I’ve talked about facing fears a number of times on this show. Most people who have a "self help" type of show probably talk a lot of about fears. And for great reason: Fears keep us from experiencing LOVE in life. You can boil your decisions down to a choice between fear and love, and that...
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Do You Know Your Center? The Success Of Your Relationships Depends On It!
This episode was inspired by a conversation I had with my father. Like many topics I cover in this podcast, my own life is the testing ground where I attempt to choose LOVE over FEAR, and share with you the things I've learned. Today I'm talking about the importance of knowing what your center is…
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Who Are You When No One Is Watching?
The self improvement game is, many times, a public one. Spiritual, physical, mental and emotional self work can all be done in the open or with a group of people. And with group meditation and yoga and other similar things really taking off these days, one could buy into the idea that self...
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Here's Why You Keep Getting Into Unhealthy Relationships
Today's podcast was inspired by an email I received from a listener. Her situation is something that I think many of us can relate to, and it has to do with RELATIONSHIPS. Situation: you're in a relationship, it ends for whatever reason, you feel hurt/betrayed/wronged, you do some soul searching,...
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What The Birth Of My Child Has Taught Me About Faith (It's Not What You're Thinking)
This episode is all about FAITH, but not in the most widely used sense. I’m talking about having supreme confidence and trust in someone or something. I look at faith like this: FAITH = TRUST + SURRENDER. On Sunday September 11th, 2016 Sarah and I welcomed the birth of our daughter Maya. Through...
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How To Expand The Great Things In Life Through Focus
You've probably heard sayings like"What you think you become." (Buddha) and "What you focus on expands." (T. Harv Eker). They are great and make for awesome social media quotes and refrigerator magnets. But I think the fact that they are used (perhaps overused today) so much has watered down the...
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Breaking Your Fear Patterns Once And For All
By now you might have heard of the Tony Robbins documentary “I am not your guru”. It’s been making its way around Netflix and the internet. If you haven’t seen it, I recommend you give it a watch! Well, I checked it out the other day and can honestly say that few other documentaries have inspired...
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Your Relationships Are Killing You
I truly believe that your relationships are the most important factor to your health (and I'm not talking about relationships in the way you might be thinking). You don't want to miss this one because this episode will get you thinking! What you’ll learn in this episode: The types of…
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The One Thing I Use to Get Back on Track to Achieving My Goals
This episode was inspired by an article titled “The one sentence that finally inspired me to lose 70 pounds”. I read that and thought to myself, “I want to know that one thing!!!” Not because I feel I need to lose 70 pounds, but because anytime someone claims to know the one thing/secret/habit I...
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Who Will You Become In 2025? My Favorite Practice For Ensuring A Healthy, Wealthy and Amazing New Year
Who will you become in 2018? We're all used to setting new years resolutions and goals for what we want to DO in the upcoming year, but rarely do we make time for a much more important exercise -- being clear on who we want to become in the new year. STRUGGLING WITH CONSISTENCY? Download the free...
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The 6 F's - Having It A.L.L. Framework Part 3
This is part 3 in my series where I'm breaking down the meaning of A.L.L. - Abundant Loving Life, and where I'm sharing my framework for "having it all". In the A.L.L. framework, I've chosen to focus on what I think are 6 key areas of life: Faith, Family, Friends, Fitness, Finance, and Fun....
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What is Your Love Conversation? - Having It A.L.L. Framework Part 2
Continuing our series on the Having It A.L.L. framework, today's episode is all about LOVE. I have a special guest on this episode with me today, one perfectly suited to chat with me about love. In this conversation you'll learn: The difference between conditional and unconditional love Where…
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What is Abundance and How Do I Invite More Into My Life? - Having It A.L.L. Framework Part 1
I’ve always been inspired by the genius men and women who were able to take a concept such as love, or effectiveness or even personal finance, and find the patterns within them that can allow ordinary mortals like you and I to tap into and experience these things fully. Well before I had a…
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A Simple Framework for "Having It All" in Your Life
What does "having it all" mean to you? It’s a question that I ask all of the guests I have on the show, and it’s a question to which I’ve never heard the exact same answer twice. I started this podcast partly because of the polarizing nature of that question. On one side you have people who…
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What To Do When Someone Challenges Your Beliefs
We have all been in a situation where another person has challenged a belief that we held. Big or small, we know what it feels like to be questioned and to then feel like we need to defend our beliefs. Well, I'm no stranger to this either, and I had an excellent opportunity to experience this…
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A Story of Healing: Using Curiosity and Courage to Find Yourself with Monique Ruffin
Monique Ruffin is a celebration of living. She is one of those people that folks say has “A beautiful soul”. And I completely understand why. Monique grew up in the neighborhood of Watts in Los Angeles. Yes, that Watts. It's where Sanford And Sons was set, and was where Denzel Washington and…
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Why You're Failing to Tap Into Your Full Creative Potential and How to Actually Do Something About It!
“We are all creators. Whether or not we create is not up to us. We are human, and creating is what we do.” - Michael Gungor You are a creator! Yes, you. Whether you not you believe it is irrelevant, because like Michael Gungor said, “We are human and creating is what we do.” In every role we play...
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Why Personal Mission Statements Are the Most Powerful Way to Uncover Your Direction and Path
At the end of last week's episode I left you with a cliffhanger. Last week I was talking about FEEDBACK and the power of feedback to ensure you stay on path in life. I introduced the question, "What's the point of being on path if you don't know where the path is leading you to?" I left you with...
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ABOUT THIS SHOW
Welcome to Having It A.L.L., the podcast that flips the script on what it means to “have it all” in life. I’m Matthew Bivens, your host and friend, and I’m inviting you to join me in conversations designed to help you radically shift your confidence, self worth, and clarity. In order to create new results in your life - whether that’s in your relationships, your health, your money, your family or your life’s purpose - you must make new decisions and build new habits. This podcast will not only deliver the lessons and action items that will help you move the needle in your life, but also share the vulnerable and honest truth about the challenges of working to improve and ultimately master yourself. Each breakdown can lead to breakthrough, and we cover it all on this podcast. Personal development is not an easy road, but you can create meaningful change that lasts. Let’s do it together one choice at a time. Tune in each week and see that it’s not only possible to have it all, but that
HOSTED BY
Matthew Bivens
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Frequently Asked Questions
How many episodes does Having It A.L.L. have?
Having It A.L.L. currently has 575 episodes available on PodParley. New episodes are automatically indexed when they're published to the podcast feed.
What is Having It A.L.L. about?
Welcome to Having It A.L.L., the podcast that flips the script on what it means to “have it all” in life. I’m Matthew Bivens, your host and friend, and I’m inviting you to join me in conversations designed to help you radically shift your confidence, self worth, and clarity. In order to create new...
How often does Having It A.L.L. release new episodes?
Having It A.L.L. releases new episodes frequently with a large back catalog of 575 episodes. Check the episode list for recent publication dates.
Where can I listen to Having It A.L.L.?
You can listen to Having It A.L.L. on PodParley by clicking any episode. We provide an embedded audio player for direct listening, and you can also subscribe via your preferred podcast app using the RSS feed.
Who hosts Having It A.L.L.?
Having It A.L.L. is created and hosted by Matthew Bivens.
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