INsight - Insurance News

In this week’s edition of INSIGHT, corduroy pillows make headlines! Yes, it’s a journalist’s worse nightmare: a week that’s a little light on hard hitting news and to be honest, they’re more concerned about how that gives me carte blanche on the intros. So much so, John is threatening to kick me out of the podcast because of my obsession of acting like a news anchor. More on that after the break.

In this week’s edition of INSIGHT, I have previously been accused of plagiarism, their words not mine. Like when my car was stolen from a multistorey car park, the accusation is wrong on so many levels. None of the intro puns are mine, nor are they that funny. To counter the accusation, I ordered a book of puns last week, but I didn't get it.

In this week’s edition of INSIGHT, it's on. It's on like Donkey Kong. On like the movie Tron. On like The Gospel according to John and on like a kung-fu swan. Big acquisition news dropped late on Friday, and like a book about gravity, we just couldn’t put it down.

In this week’s edition of INSIGHT my mother always used to say if you keep staring at it you’ll end up going blind. I never believed her but thought I should learn braille in any case. I found that if you're going to learn braille, don't have any expectations, just go in blind. Of course we all know not to make fun of braille. It’s a very touchy subject.

In this week’s edition of INSIGHT I don’t want to be the bear of bad news, but I’ve managed to shoehorn an unbearable Goldlocks theme into the intro. Three angles compete to be Goldilocks' husband. The first is obtuse and unattractive; Goldilocks says no. The second is a-cute one but is unintelligent; again, Goldilocks says no. But the third, ah yes, the third, is just right.

In this week’s edition of INSIGHT we are taking a step back from our regular format today to acknowledge the tragic passing of Tim Wedlock. In times like this, business as usual takes a backseat. The outpouring of love and respect across the industry over these past few days is a poignant reminder of what matters most—our shared humanity and relationships. Tim’s impact on this industry was profound, and he will be deeply missed.

So last week was our 250th edition of INSIGHT and yet I was so focused on my farm jokes, I forgot to acknowledge the milestone. I just ploughed on regardless. When we first started back in 2020 they laughed when I told them I wanted to be the humorous podcast host. Well they’re not laughing now. And as we’re talking codes again this week, I thought I’d ask Claude how many jokes they counted in all those 250 episodes. Just the one they answered dryly.

This week’s 250th edition of INSIGHT gives me the chance to tell a cautionary tale of the MacDonald farm family dynasty. Due to bankruptcy, Old McDonald has to sell his farm to cover what he e-i-e-i owed. At first the family employed the eldest son at Old McDonald's Farm to be the new CI-EIO, but he couldn’t turn the farm’s fortunes around. Finally, they let the tech-savvy youngest son take over, and he replaced the entire farmhand staff with A-I... A-I... Oh, you get the picture.

Welcome to this Insurance News special edition of the INsight podcast. This is the story of the inaugural UAC Leadership Academy Class of 26. In this podcast you’ll hear from industry experts, supports and some of the incredible participants of the program that we had the pleasure of interviewing.

In this week’s edition of INSIGHT, we face the tricky assignment of starting this usually vacuous intro on the theme of Shariah: the fundamental religious law and moral code of Islam, derived from the Quran. The tricky part is I misread the headline and thought it was actually about the basketballer Shaq.

In this week’s edition of INSIGHT, it’s all a bit one zero, one, zero, zero, one, zero, one, one, zero, zero one, one, zero, one, one, zero, one, zero. The industry has cracked three codes all at once. Four if you include Da Vinci. Can you tell I used to work as a programmer for autocorrect until they fried me for no raisin?

In this week’s edition of INSIGHT, we’re going real slow. So slow it would take us three hours to watch 60 minutes. Actually, my Doctor just diagnosed me with a slow puncture. I wasn’t upset, just a little let down.

In this week’s edition of INSIGHT, we’ve been watching old reruns of The Block with our archaeologist friend. She says that all the houses in Pompeii had the same design flaw. The flaw is lava. 

In this week’s Get Smart edition of INSIGHT, we know what our spy name would be. It's our last name, followed by a brief pause, then our first name and last name. Editor-in-chief Deex, John Deex is deep under cover at the AFR Insurance event in Sydney. Last report he was looking around for a gents. Sorry, agents.

In this week’s edition of INSIGHT, I need to start with an apology. No, it’s not that my jokes were so bad, but one listener did suggest that last week’s intro about the growing issue of mental health shouldn’t be trivialised with my questionable joke telling. I’m happy to say sorry if I offended anyone. But, it’s shopping carts we really should feel sorry for. They’re always getting pushed around.

In this week’s edition of INSIGHT, like the ICA we’re going a little bit crazy worrying about mental health. My doctor asked us if anyone in the podcast suffered from mental illness. But I didn’t understand, we all seem to enjoy it. In fact, I met my wife at a metal institution: we’re crazy about each other.

In this week’s edition of INSIGHT, it’s time for more politics. As impressionable young teenagers, members of the pod were often seen wearing Rage Against The Machine t-shirts, flipping the bird in the direction of Canberra and telling our parents we will NOT do what you tell me.

In this week’s edition of INSIGHT, we deep dive into the federal budget, which is slightly ironic given this is episode two for one. Yes, federal financial policy is such a joke even their budget is cracking up. I was concerned they would shut down my local community art class. Sure they can make cuts, but my art class is where I draw the line.

In this week’s edition of INSIGHT, we’ve just come back from a night of karaoke. Well, actually our intern Sam got us kicked out early for singing Fly Me To The Danger Zone five times. Apparently, he exceeded the maximum number of Loggins attempts. Everyone told Sam not to sing. But Samsung anyway.

In this week’s edition of INSIGHT, I wasn’t sure whether to make this introduction about weather. Meteorology is probably the only science field where they’re actually trained in small talk. The sky was overcast this morning so I asked Siri, “Surely, it’s not going to rain today?” And she replied, “Yes it is, and don’t call me Shirley.” That was when I realized I’d left my phone on Airplane mode. 

In this week’s edition of INSIGHT, we celebrate some of the more interesting news in quite a while. Scientists have discovered a new type of polar bear. It can live in both the North and South poles, is prone to extreme mood swings and mates with both genders. It's a bi-polar bipolar bi, polar bear.

In this week’s edition of INSIGHT, after some strong listener feedback on these introductions, we’ve decided to give out Bega vouchers to anyone who complains in the comments. Thay way they can have their whine and cheese. This joke’s a bit cheesy, but I’ll milk it for all it is worth. 

In this week’s holy edition of INSIGHT, we’re looking forward to Easter. I originally thought it was going to be on April first, so I was going to send my kids to look for Easter eggs that I haven’t hidden. To be honest, that’s not my joke, someone lent it to me.

In this week’s edition of INSIGHT, give me an S, give me a T, give me an R, give me an A, give me a R, or was it a T or an A? Spelling was never my strong suit (I once accidentally messaged my wife "I'm having a great time. I wish you were her”).

In this week’s edition of INSIGHT, I did some research. It might surprise you to know I haven’t done a flood or water-related pun for 37 episodes. What won’t surprise you is that when I did, it wasn’t funny but then nor are the two significant events that have been declared this week. Bring it up now might be too soon after the flooding, but I don’t give a dam.

This week’s edition of INSIGHT is sponsored by the car cowboys like to drive, the Audi Partner. I get the chance to reference one of my favourite movies, The Good The Bad and The Ugly. My parents were disappointed with how ugly I turned out to be, so one day when I was young I ate an abacus. I showed them it’s what on the inside that counts.

In this special feature INsight podcast we cover the highlights, insights, forsesights and terrabites from Insurtech Live 26, brought to you by Insurtech Australia, the not-for-profit industry association for insurtech and insurance innovation.

This week’s edition of INSIGHT I’m not going to sing the lyrics to war what is it good for? As it might be a little dark, so I thought I’d start off with a fun fact. Did you know Sweden and Denmark hold the record for most wars fought between two countries? The good news is that none have happened since Denmark got LEGO and Sweden got IKEA. I guess it just takes them forever to assemble the army. 

In this week’s edition of INSIGHT, in honour of Robert Kelly’s retirement announcement, I'm announcing that I’m retiring from telling dad jokes. Now I only tell Grand Dad jokes. It’s one monumental reporting time. But with even more reports published than usual my wife told me that I had to choose between our relationship and my career as a reporter. Have I got some news for her.

In this week’s edition of INSIGHT, we are soooooo in tune with the industry, this is episode number CPS 230. Or so I’m told. I thought it was CP-3 pee-ohh and had written this entire intro before editorial corrected me. They sent me amendments in a PDF which I had to read using my Adobe One Kenobe.

In this week’s edition of INSIGHT, the news highlights are all about big movements and large breaches. But don’t be fooled. This episode is not like two robbers stealing women’s underwear. No, we’re not looking for a pair of knickers.

In this week’s edition of INSIGHT, we were hoping 2026 didn’t start off as bad as 2025 ended. Alas, much like when I accidentally swallowed some food colouring at Christmas, sure ChatGPT said I’d be okay, but I feel like I’ve dyed a little inside. So a new year, new stories, but also the same unresolved issues. It reminds me of that time the past, the present and the future walked into a bar. Man, it was tense, it is tense and it will be tense.

In the last edition of INSIGHT of 2025, it seems all a bit too serious at the moment for a humorous intro. Never fear, we won’t change our ways and will be back with groan-inducing summaries in 2026.

In this week’s edition of INSIGHT, we’re celebrating numbers. It’s episode 226. 226 is part of Aron-son's sequence (look it up if you’re having trouble sleeping). Apparently, 226 is also a happy number, but some of the numbers in this week’s news will leave you feeling a lot less happy. Much like my jokes.

In this week’s special edition of INSIGHT AFTER DARK, we’re getting up close and personal. Yes, we want to know all about you dear listener. Do you like long walks on a beach? Do you drink coconut-and-rum-based cocktails during periods of significant precipitation? Tell us your mother’s maiden name and whether you’ve ever given money to a relative of a Nigerian Prince? Yes, tell us everything…

In this week’s edition of INSIGHT, we’d like to take a moment to thank the English cricket team. They’re the gift that keeps on giving (well at least for two days). Bazball really blows and more than our Editor-in-chief who’s a big fan.

In this week’s edition of INSIGHT, I’m wishing last night’s breaking news came a little earlier so I could make some jokes about emojis; eyeroll emoji; facepalm emoji with a purple shirt; thumbs-down emoji. Instead, we’re still talking about commissions. And like I said to the guy who tried to sell me a coffin, it’s the last thing I need.

In this week’s edition of INSIGHT, we’re channeling our Wall Street Gordon Gekko’s. Life all comes down to a few moments, but unlike the movie, this is not one of them. We asked several financial experts what do you need to do to make a small fortune on Wall Street. They looked at us and suggested a large fortune. Our performance is so abysmal, we’ve been recommended to buy laughing stock.

In this week’s edition of INSIGHT, the team is worried. After all the latest breaking news stories, they’re not quite sure what my introduction will contain. I tried out 10 different introductions to see if they would be okay and no pun in ten did. In the end I told them that they should worry more about me dying. It’s the last thing I’d do. 

In this week’s edition of INSIGHT, we’re in the mood for some classic soft rock. Maybe it’s because I had porridge for breakfast and spent the morning hauling oats around the kitchen.

In this week’s edition of INSIGHT, we’re in the Gold Coast mixing it up with insurance brokers from across the country at NIBA. I thought the opening night was fancy dress so I went as a screwdriver. I certainly turned a few heads.

In this week’s edition of INSIGHT, we’re as good as new. That is to say, we’re learning on the job, we’re discriminating against the old and annoying everyone by listening to New Kids On The Block on repeat.

In this week’s radar-themed edition of INSIGHT, I’m reminded of the time I changed the voice on my satnav GPS device to Bono from U2. It was quite the mistake as all the streets have no name, and I still haven't found what I'm looking for. 

In this week’s edition of INSIGHT, we’re focusing on legal matters in the industry. It allows me a very tenuous link to one of my favourite ever adages: Once you’ve eaten at one food court, you’ve eaten at the mall.

In this week’s edition of INSIGHT, Wendy and I were playing cards with a deck that was missing a suit. I didn’t have the heart to tell her. I made my excuses and went to my doctor and told her I felt like a pack of cards. She just told me to lie down and she’d deal with me in the morning. 

In this week’s edition of INSIGHT, you might notice I'm a little tired. I couldn’t sleep last night. I was lying awake wondering if Batman didn’t want to expose his identity, was he driving the Batmobile uninsured, or was he committing insurance fraud?

This week’s edition of INSIGHT is all about Dr Mulino’s European tour. I hope he’s careful if he rents a car over there. I rented one, but the ride was really bumpy so I took it to a mechanic who filled the shock absorbers with yogurt. It was quite the culture shock. 

This week’s edition of INSIGHT is brought to you by the number five million three hundred and eighteen thousand and eight. Numbers are strange. Odd even. If puns leave you numb, then these mathematical puns will leave you number.

This week’s edition of INSIGHT has all the colours of the rainbow. I caught a rainbow recently and was able to weigh it. It was pretty light. Unfortunately, it was a bad rainbow and is now in prism after a light sentencing.

In this week’s edition of INSIGHT, we’re pretty fly for a white rye as the big insurers are making the dough and it’s on the rise. Some say success baguettes success, but it’s the yeast they could do after some very challenging years.