It Takes A Village

Many devoted parents instinctively step in to protect and guide their children yet struggle to know when to step back. For 35 years, Dr Jenny Brown has researched child and adolescent mental health and parent's involvement. She says while "helicopter parenting" is widely discouraged, parents are often left without clear, practical alternatives. This is explored in her new book, The Parenting Paradox, and says to truly love our children, we must also give them the space to grow.Go to this episode on rnz.co.nz for more details

Speech delays or difficulties can be concerning but there are a number of myths surrounding speech and language, so when should we be worried? Speech and language therapist Christian Wright.Go to this episode on rnz.co.nz for more details

"What were you thinking!?" - the exclamation many parents, caregivers or teachers can make, when trying to decipher what and why kids do what they do.Go to this episode on rnz.co.nz for more details

Getting children to eat their veggies, try new foods, and generally get a balanced diet are age-old parenting challenges. From the earliest introduction of solids, to picky toddlers, and growing teenagers, the trials are endless. So how do you deal with a fussy eater, and when does it become a more serious health issue? Registered dietitian Anna Richards has some tips.Go to this episode on rnz.co.nz for more details

Why modern childhood's putting parenting to the test, and why a radical parenting approach is needed to help free kids from constantly responding to their defence system.Go to this episode on rnz.co.nz for more details

Who rules the roost in your household? And when can these accommodations become a problem? Jenny Hale is a senior parenting coach at the Parenting Place.Go to this episode on rnz.co.nz for more details

How do all the education changes affect students and what support might they need? Go to this episode on rnz.co.nz for more details

A leading researcher says New Zealand's official data systems fail to track the realities of co-parenting and shared care arrangements. Often unseen because they are not counted in the Census, these shared care arrangements are happening in one-in-five households, according to Motu Research's senior fellow Kate Prickett. Parents getting less informal support from the other parent for things like clothing, food and transport among others had higher rates of anxiety and depression. Kate Prickett says the research shows families with shared care exist in a middle ground between the sole parents, and the two parent home. And policy frameworks are often not flexible to their complexity. Go to this episode on rnz.co.nz for more details

The long-standing friction in parenting - who does the unpaid, administrative, load? The scheduling and the logistics of the kids' lives. Who signs the form for a school trip, who chooses and buys the birthday presents and then organises the party, who's in the group chat for after school activities? For the parent doing too much how can they step away, and do less? And for the parent not doing enough how can they get up to speed and be better part of the system? Kristin Ward leads the parent coaching team at the Parenting Place. Go to this episode on rnz.co.nz for more details

Research by the Mental Health Foundation NZ suggests that half of bullying scenarios stop if a peer intervenes. But how can we teach our kids to be UPstanders - someone who intervenes when someone is being bullied - as opposed to BYstanders? Kylie Ryan has a clinical background in social work.Go to this episode on rnz.co.nz for more details

André Ngapo is learning designer and national coach at Brainwave Trust Aotearoa which focuses giving tamariki the best start in life.Go to this episode on rnz.co.nz for more details

FAFO parenting is all the hype online but what is it and is it the answer for exhausted parents moving on from gentle parenting? Go to this episode on rnz.co.nz for more details

The so-called 'manosphere' has been in the headlines following Louis Theroux's documentary into the network of influencers promoting hyper masculine viewpoints and spreading misogyny. These influencers, who were once fringe, are now very much in mainstream. And while Theroux's documentary focused on the personalities of these people themselves, others are interested in the real life impact on our young boys and girls. Dr Marcelle Nader-Turner is a counsellor and neuropsychotherapist based at St Hilda's Collegiate School in Dunedin and sees first-hand how “manosphere” is pressuring how our rangatahi behave with unhelpful stereotypes. Go to this episode on rnz.co.nz for more details

In New Zealand, there is no age-verification system to prevent of young people viewing online pornography. Often, this content can be graphic, sometimes violent - including coercive or non-consensual behaviour. Therapist, educator and researcher Jo Robertson has called for better safeguards. She joins Kathryn to discuss what other countries are doing - and how parents and caregivers can navigate the issue.Go to this episode on rnz.co.nz for more details

Repeating mental pathways, giving time to emotions and being a good debater are all key parts of learning to think critically, says an expert in teaching the important skill.Go to this episode on rnz.co.nz for more details

how do you know what information to trust, where to turn, and how to cut through the noise. Dr Natalie Flynn is a registered clinical psychologist, the author of Smart Mothering - where she dubbed this - "bombardment syndrome", and the co-founder of Parentland, alongside her late husband Nigel Latta.Go to this episode on rnz.co.nz for more details

Social media is brimming with advice about how to get make money in a hurry - and that can be very attractive to young people. So how best to get teens interested in their money - and how to manage it wisely?Go to this episode on rnz.co.nz for more details

Speech and language therapist Christian Wright discusses the difficulty of asking children what they did at school that day and why often they'll simply say "nothing". Christian and Kathryn explore why this question is so hard for children to answer and how can parents turn it into a back-and-forth interaction, all while building a child's language and conversation skillsGo to this episode on rnz.co.nz for more details

As children get older and take more responsibility for their teeth, what can parents and caregivers do to ensure good habits through to adulthood? Go to this episode on rnz.co.nz for more details

Do you have to video call grandchildren living overseas? Or perhaps you email your grandparents who are abroad? In the modern world it's common for families to be split over countries and continents.Go to this episode on rnz.co.nz for more details

Dr Niraj Lal is a Melbourne-based researcher and writer whose new book is aimed at getting kids thinking about how they use the internet, who they interact with and what data is being gathered about them.Go to this episode on rnz.co.nz for more details

Remember the days when children would roam free, playing with friends around the neighbourhood. How can parents encourage their offspring back to outdoor free play? Go to this episode on rnz.co.nz for more details

Elana Cohen is an occupational therapist who has two decades experience working with children of all ages and abilities - and their families. She's Nelson based - working for Health NZ's Child Development Service, as well as in private practice. Elana says parents and caregivers need lots of support to help neurodivergent children flourish.Go to this episode on rnz.co.nz for more details

Return-to-school nerves can be a normal reaction after the long summer break, but when should parents be concerned and what can they do about it? Go to this episode on rnz.co.nz for more details

Otago University's Dr Johanna Reidy researches the impact of school uniform design and policy on health and educational outcomes.Go to this episode on rnz.co.nz for more details

Summer holidays come with plenty of opportunities for children to utter 'I'm bored'. Parenting expert Zhenlin Wang on whether that's a bad thing.Go to this episode on rnz.co.nz for more details

School's out - so what now for the kids? Let them run wild? Kristin Ward is a coach and presenter with Parenting Place. Go to this episode on rnz.co.nz for more details

Is competition, jealousy, and conflict between brothers and sisters a normal part of growing up? While bickering and nitpicking can be hard for parents, can sibling rivalry also be a way for children to learn life skills? Kathryn talks with Clinical Psychologist and mum of three, Jacqui Maguire.Go to this episode on rnz.co.nz for more details

Wwhen puberty hits and suddenly you don't recognise your own child. Clinical Psychologist Kathryn Berkett on brain development in adolescence.Go to this episode on rnz.co.nz for more details

As we barrel toward Christmas, you might be about to make the most of this month's crazy sales days. Perhaps a phone or a gaming device for a young family member makes your shopping list. But before you look to leave one wrapped under the tree - my parenting expert is along with some things to consider before handing out the technical toys. Anna McKessar is an online course producer with Parenting Place and joins me with some tips about alternatives to smartphones for younger kids, key steps for parents embarking on a device journey with their kids and how to set good boundaries and online expectations with older children.Go to this episode on rnz.co.nz for more details

Some studies have shown not only is swimming great exercise and an essential safety and lifesaving skill, swimming can also positively impact a child cognitively, emotionally, and socially.Go to this episode on rnz.co.nz for more details

How to coach children on understanding and making good friendships.Go to this episode on rnz.co.nz for more details

Love it or loathe it - it's that time of year when kids roam loose around neighbourhoods looking for fun and sweets. Go to this episode on rnz.co.nz for more details

New research has shown children are far more likely to participate in play and sport when a parent is doing it themselves. Research from Sport NZ finds more than half of young people say spending time with family and friends is their top reason for being active - and those kids who like being active with whanau are more likely to meet recommended guidelines for physical activity. Scott MacKenzie is the play manager at Sport New Zealand talks with Kathryn about raising active kids. Go to this episode on rnz.co.nz for more details

Speech and Language Therapist Christian Wright talks to Kathryn about what typical language development in pre-schoolers looks like, when parents should be concerned, and what they can do to help.Go to this episode on rnz.co.nz for more details

Financial education will be embedded in the school curriculum for years 1 to 10 from next year. For younger children it'll be the basics like want vs need, and what is a bank account. More senior students will learn about budgeting, investment, interest, taxes, and insurance to help to build lifelong financial skills. Neil Edmond is the founder of MoneyTime, an online financial literacy program for children ages 10 to 14 which has just been awarded 'Best Primary Product' at the Global EdTech Awards. He's on an advisory group working with the Retirement Commission to support the implementation of financial education in the new social sciences curriculum. He says parents need to start the work at home, and the earlier the better.Go to this episode on rnz.co.nz for more details

How many teenagers know what they want to do when they leave school? Jane Kennelly, the Director of People for Skills Group, says in this era of fast-moving technological change it's hard for anyone to know exactly where the job market's going to go - let alone kids. Go to this episode on rnz.co.nz for more details

Clinical psychologist Polly Schaverien talks with Kathryn about helping teenagers with anxiety and unhealthy perfectionism. She says adolescence is a time of exponential growth and development, and the "job" of the teen is to establish their identity, develop socially and learn emotional regulation. She says parents play a big role - and the first thing they need to do is check their own perfectionism. In other words, are you getting joy out of your children's achievements? Or are you deriving your own self-esteem from seeing your children achieve?Go to this episode on rnz.co.nz for more details

How to help children to be more assertive and self confident, without being demanding and aggressive. Clinical psychologist and mum of 3, Jacqui Maguire says assertiveness is a life skill, not a personality trait. She says children can learn it with practice, encouragement, and role models. But often parents don't really have a handle on this skill either and assertiveness takes practice for everyone. Go to this episode on rnz.co.nz for more details

Cooking and baking with children is a great idea - even if its makes a helluva mess, according to early childhood education research specialist Dr Vicki Hargraves. She's an early childhood teacher and mother, and ECE research specialist at The Education Hub, an organization that supports teachers with knowledge about best practice. She says spending time in the kitchen with your children is a great way to support their learning - from shapes, colours, comprehension, sequencing and creativity. And if you do a good job, you'll end up with kids who can share the cooking load in the household.Go to this episode on rnz.co.nz for more details

What are the pros and cons of handing out awards to children? From player of the day in sport, to winner of the spelling bee, to Dux of the school. Dr Elise Waghorn is a Lecturer at R-M-I-T University's School of Education in Melbourne. She says while awards can reward effort, they can also be unhelpful and lead to a fixed mind set in children.Go to this episode on rnz.co.nz for more details

Babies born during Covid-19 lockdowns developed and moved through early milestones under challenging and unique circumstances. Whānau Āwhina Plunket Chief Nurse Zoe Tipa talks about what families can do to help their 4 and 5 year olds as they start or prepare to start school.Go to this episode on rnz.co.nz for more details

In parenting today, how to raise resilient children who don't wilt at the first hurdle they face. Go to this episode on rnz.co.nz for more details

Neuroscience educator and parenting coach Nathan Wallis discusses finding the balance with boundaries for children and teens while maintaining an open trusting relationship. He says boundaries give children an edge to their world, and teach them what's acceptable. Go to this episode on rnz.co.nz for more details

Sadness, nerves, jealousy, anger and frustration - just like adults, children feel these emotions, but sometimes don't have the words or skills to deal with them. Gen Muir is a social worker, parent educator, author, founder of Connected Parenting and mum of four boys. Go to this episode on rnz.co.nz for more details

Parenting can be a challenge at the best of times - but what about when mum or dad are experiencing low mood ? - Clinical Psychologist Ben Sedley with strategies to help Go to this episode on rnz.co.nz for more details

Owning a smartphone before age 13 is associated with poorer mind health and wellbeing in early adulthood, according to a global study of more than 100,000 young people. The study was published earlier this week in the peer-reviewed Journal of Human Development and Capabilities, and found that 18- to 24-year-olds who had received their first smartphone at age 12 or younger were more likely to report suicidal thoughts, aggression, detachment from reality, poorer emotional regulation, and low self-worth. OECD data in 2018 showed that New Zealand youth used digital devices 42 hours per week on average, compared to 35 hours globally, and studies have shown that children's screen use has increased since then. So how can parents and caregivers manage screen time? Kathryn speaks with Jackie Riach, psychologist and country lead for Triple P New Zealand which provides parenting programmes nationwide.Go to this episode on rnz.co.nz for more details

At 37, many people are still getting to grips with being a parent. Matty Acton was learning how to be a grandparent. He and his wife Esther have two kids, aged 8 and 11, and he's also stepdad to Esther's 23 year old son Ethan - who became a dad himself last year. Esther and Matty, who's also a breakfast radio host on Brisbane's B105 radio station, have been documenting their journey on their podcast called Underaged Grandparents. In it they explore the unexpected challenges of becoming grandies while still navigating parenting, marriage and life in general. Matty also has well over 200-thousand followers on Facebook and Instagram, where he posts skits about daily life - like 'how to trick your kids into a confession', 'when mum has had enough', how house rules change when you have guests' and 'things parents of boys say...parts one and two.'Go to this episode on rnz.co.nz for more details

Sara Segar discusses how parents help turn experiences into learning for their children. She runs the Experiential Learning Depot in Minnesota and developed a range of resources for teachers and families, when she realised there was a desire for hands-on, authentic learning at home and in the classroom, but no material to help.Go to this episode on rnz.co.nz for more details

The costs - and pain - associated with poor oral health care has become a huge burden on families and the health system, so how can parents get it right for their kids, and encourage good dental habits that last into their later years? Basic dental care is free in New Zealand for children from birth until they turn 18. But there are thousands of children currrently on waiting lists for dental treatment, we're talking serious surgeries which require them to go under general anaesthetic, with sugar consumption a significant contributor along with a lack of dental clinic visits. Oral health promotions manager at the New Zealand Dental Association is Anishma Ram. The NZDA has more information on dental care for children here. Go to this episode on rnz.co.nz for more details