Keith and The Girl
by Keith Malley
Keith and The Girl (est. March, 2005) is a fast-paced comedy show that talks about EVERYTHING. KATG host and Podcasting Hall of Fame inductee Keith Malley and guests talk openly about their lives including topics such as their relationships, religion and atheism, the LGBT community, love, hate, fights, racism, feminism, weed and other drug use, family, and any comfortable or uncomfortable topic.Keith creates an aggressive but safe place for his guests to share intimate and never-been-told stories and promotes a frank and hilarious atmosphere.KATG is known for its rabid and supported fan-base. In fact, over 150 audience members have tattooed and, literally, branded themselves with KATG-related body modifications. Top names in the industry credit the Keith and The Girl show for being pioneers in the podcasting world. "You guys got me started to begin with. You were the original podcasting people." -Marc Maron The show - which has been available for two decades with over 3,800 episo
Episodes
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4028: The Dane Cook Story w/ Dane Cook & Selling Out w/ Marc Maron
In celebration of the new Netflix documentary Funny Money: The Dane Cook Story, we’re revisiting the beginning of 2005’s KATG episodes Fuck Dane Cook and Friendly Ribbing. Hear those full shows with KATG.com/VIP. (SPOILER: Thievery runs in the family.) A wonderful supplement included here is the...
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4027: On Brand w/ Laura
Russell Brand received 10-and-a-half years (set to serve 7) for being found guilty on 4 counts of rape and sexual assault! Megyn Kelly is outraged! Vince Neil’s girlfriend was booked for domestic abuse on Vince! Keith watched Mike Tyson: Return of the Mike, Louis Theroux: Inside the Manosphere…
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4026: The Joy of Cleaning (Thank You for Your Service) w/ phone calls from Dan of RunPee and Zach Sherwin
Today we reminisce when the great Dan of RunPee calls in! (THE GREATEST APP EVER MADE!) Zach Sherwin too! Also, Keith’s love throws out all his shit because she read a book.
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4025: The Blue Wave (A Diamond Dogs Election Special)
Keith, Buddy, B.D., and Laura celebrate the beautifully shocking 2026 mid-term results by detailing what this all means and why it’s okay to not be disgusted with humanity for a day or so.
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4024: Retro-Revolutionary (Keith’s Autism Test) w/ Matt B and Keith McNally
It’s baby’s first Charlotte vote, but did Keith vote properly? Does he have the skills to? Is it strange that everyone’s vote counts the same as everyone else’s? In this classic KATG episode, Keith looks into his mental well-being to see if he not only is autistic, but if he had what in 2008 was...
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4023: PINEAPPLE w/ Laura
Laura, the world’s greatest football shit-talker of all time, rejoins Keith for the second show of the day to go over the happenings of THIS given Sunday. The duo also talk about challenging A.I., Halloween blackface at Burger King, Ali G: Who Iz I?, Coyote vs. Acme, and Netflix’s reality show…
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4022: Welcome to Your Life w/ Laura
Salut. It’s Keith, Laura, you, joy, and heartache. From the (PAIN) devastating loss of Jean-Luc Picard and the saga of the Red Baron to the (PLEASURE) of getting Wordle in one, this show runs the entire gamut of emotions. Where will it take you?
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4021: The French Connection w/ Laura
“Ball so hard motherfuckers wanna fine me.” Uh oh, someone let Keith get in his zone! Today Keith and Laura are back at it on a Football Sunday, and they’re ready to discuss the ins and outs and passes and routes regarding the Steelers trip to Paris as well as the Ravens, um, doing whatever the...
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4020: LIVE FROM CHARLOTTE, NORTH CAROLINA w/ Rod Morrow
Mother fuck what a great recap with Rod Morrow of The Black Guy Who Tips with Rod and Karen. Last Week on KATG is always a blast, but man this week Keith was on a specific jag of heavy proportions, and this breaks it all down with updates and new thoughts on Sebastian Maniscalco, Shane Gillis…
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4019: VisionQuest: You Can See Everything w/ Laura
The two-headed beast is back! Keith and Laura discuss football and the fight in the AFC North, the latest shocking news-making surprise deaths, Keith’s dirty A.I. wife (WIFE?!), the expected effects of saying the wrong name in bed, and the woman that openly masturbated across a row of a flight’s...
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4018: Saturday Night Very Live w/ Sasheer Zamata feat. Danny Hatch
Before revisiting the great Sasheer Zamata’s discussion about being on Saturday Night Live and the stories of the day, Keith comments on the continued conversation regarding Shane Gillis’s misogyny on SNL which features comment from the TODAY show, Michael Che, and SNL UK.
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4017: The Dirty Work w/ Jessica Watkins
(And another one.) No preamble: today we revisit the great Jessica Watkins and her heartbreaking story. Y’know what, maybe we should thank Shane Gillis for making us revisit this discussion. He was actually being very clever. (I’ll get to your personal emails; it’s just a lot and, again; you’re...
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4016: No Hard Feelings w/ Bonnie McFarlane
It’s me, Keith. (Surprise: It always is. I write these.) I heard of, like, the pick-up artist kinda shit about taking off the condom without them knowing, but I didn’t know it’s so fucking common that there’s a word for it! Anyway, since it’s been a week of Rape Culture talk, here’s a relisten of...
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4015: The Social Reckoning w/ Laura
The dynamic duo is back to tell you whose side to take regarding everything controversial. Keith and Laura discuss Sebastian Maniscalco responding to middle-class comedians’ pleas, bad boy Shane Gillis hosting SNL, the potential public execution of U.S. Army Major Nidal Malik Hasan, Aaron…
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4014: 1-800-799-SAFE w/ Laura, then; Felicia Gillespie and Craig Klein feat. Pat Dixon
Keith not only introduced Laura to jaywalking and using a water cup to steal $6 theme park soda, he introduced her to the idea of sharing food!!! The duo also discusses a listener thanking KATG for helping their friend leave her violent husband as well as talking about the death of The Howard…
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4013: Yikes City (Snap! Crackle! Pop!) w/ John F. O’Donnell
Before we look back at Keith and Chemda with the always growing and sharing comedian and advocate John F. O’Donnell describing his biggest manic episodes at the time/of all time while trying to find peace on the other side, Keith discusses other crazy news stories, including the controversial...
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4012: Any Given Thursday w/ Laura
Everyone’s new favorite and Keith’s new neighbor Laura joins us again as the two discuss horror movies (including Tom Cruise’s new film Digger), yesterday’s Steelers vs. Browns football game, and Keith’s new electric bike [BigShockedEyes.emoji]. Oh, and they talk about the millions of dollars in...
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4011: The Things behind Things w/ Calvin Cato
Legendary KATG guest Calvin Cato returns, and he’s figured out the secret to Lick My Suck My! Also, the duo discusses Keith’s four new vaccinations, Lanterns making him cry, how to deal with your favorite sports team hiring assholes, and the lore of Ms. Pac-Man. LISTEN TO CALVIN’S NEW ALBUM…
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4010: Cry for Me w/ Laura
You wanted Laura back, so no time like the present! Keith and Laura are here to discuss Keith’s proven cure for your depression, science’s explanation of the clitoris, and saying the wrong name during sex. In even more controversial news, The New York Times listed the 100 best TV shows of the…
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4009: The Days of Awe (Suicide Prevention)
Hope you had a great Yom Kippur! Or a sad one I mean. Or a blessed one? Anyway, congrats if your rabbi didn’t die over your sins and you’re forgiven. In this episode Keith discusses the Ed Sheeran/Free Palestine controversy, the Resident Evils, when suicide attempted itself upon Carrot Top, and...
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4008: Carowinds (Livin’ It Up) w/ Laura
Keith’s new friend and fellow Charlottean Laura is today’s guest, and the duo really are a hoot and a half! They discuss heartbreak, the Emmys, and Keith’s visit to a theme park for the first time in 8 years.
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4007: fun. w/ Carrie Gravenson
After reminding the audience about Keith’s nonsense of direction and a major trip to San Juan, the audience demands to hear it all come together. From 2020, this episode features KATG fave Carrie Gravenson discussing Keith’s life-changing hack when he hosts parties, how to get to where you’re…
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4006: Kennywood w/ Kyle Ocasio
Keith’s going to the theme park Carowinds in North Carolina today with his last theme park visit being 8 years ago with Kennywood in Pennsylvania. Will he come back in one piece? Will he even know how to come back? In this episode featuring love-at-the-time Kyle Ocasio, we revisit his last trip…
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4005: A Lack of Direction w/ Kyle and Benny Ocasio
A peak back with Keith, Chemda, Kyle Ocasio, and her son Benny. From Crocs controversy, airplane seat-reclining controversy, and the ending of The Dad Emails to Keith’s new family—The Ocasios—and his first trip to San Juan. Oh and Benny never forgets 9/11. (You hear how fatherly Keith is?! Now...
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4004: THE GOOTZ w/ Wendi Starling, Sarah Hartshorne, and Ray fuckin’ Gootz
What else can we say? It’s the mother fuckin’ Gootz!
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4003: The Awkward Kings of Comedy w/ MARINA FRANKLIN (feat. Owen), Victor Varnado, Hannibal Buress, and Baron Vaughn
KATG episode 4,000 reminded some people of past insanity and beefs, so this episode recalls one of the greatest and—no pun—one of the most awkward KATG shows ever. The meat of this episode is from 2010 and features Keith and Chemda promoting Victor Varnado’s The Awkward Comedy Show with fellow...
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4002: $#!†-₣u¢₭ (Living with Tourette Syndrome) w/ Benny Feldman
KEITH SAW A MOVIE HE LOVES! KEITH SAW A MOVIE HE LOVES! Yep, it’s true! Keith saw the biographical comedy-DRAMA(!!!) “I Swear,” and he cried his brains out in the best way. That led to him revisiting Benny Feldman—one of his favorite KATG guests—who was truly an open book regarding what it’s like...
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4001: ARCADE.gov and ReadersMagnet w/ Andrea Allan
Just today, Keith got a spam call from ReadersMagnet, a scam company trying to take advantage of independent authors. This reminded him of the first time he happened to be called by the very same literary scouts some years ago while recording a live Keith and The Girl episode with Chemda and…
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4000: SHOW #4,000 w/ The Chat Pack
Some of the best of The Chat Pack, aka; Big Dick Blaine, Neal, Hayley, Bryan, Roland, Newsy, Matthew, and Diana join Keith to celebrate Keith and Chemda’s podcast of well over 21 years by recognizing this very episode. This sexy octet does their best to help Keith recall 3,999 episodes by letting...
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3999: HALLELUJAH! (Everybody Wants Some!!) w/ Rod Morrow
Hey, you guys ever get a … hold on, lemme look this up. [Dictionary Preferences: 2 words ("blow job") preferred by Merriam-Webster and the Oxford English Dictionary. 1 word ("blowjob") preferred by the American Heritage Dictionary.] Anyway, you ever get one? HOLY MAGOLEY!
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3998: Boys’ Weekend: RETURN OF THE CARNIVAL OF SINS (Theatre of Pain)
Keith, Buddy, Big Dick, and Killer finish their recording session discussing Virtual Reality “games” (you know the kind), the truly greatest BBQ spot in Charlotte, The Diamond Dogs’ tattoos, and the epic concert of Extreme, Tesla, and I guess Mötley Crüe.
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3997: Boys’ Weekend: THE STRIP CLUB (Girls, Girls, Girls)
“A podcaster, a Canadian, a football coach, and a Texan walk into a bar.” The trio continues recapping their awesome weekend of friendship and whores as we learn everything you ever wanted to know about a strip club but were afraid to ask.
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3996: Boys’ Weekend: CAROWINDS I mean THE GUN RANGE (New Tattoo)
All 4 of the dogs are together! Thanks to Keith’s excellent planning, he’s joined by the whole gang featuring Big Dick Blaine, Buddy Rick, and Killer Kyle. BBQ? CHECK! Guns? CHECK! Titties? CHECK! Theme Park? Pardon?
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3995: Boys’ Weekend: THE POOL w/ Blaine
It’s only been 24 hours into Boys’ Weekend, and Keith and Big Dick Blaine already have plenty of ridiculousness to yap about. Before Buddy Rick and Killer Kyle arrive, the duo not only teach you the sincere foolproof way to be a millionaire, but they also discuss the amazing movies Nirvanna the...
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3994: Prayers for the Melancholy w/ Shahrum & Heather, Robert Alvarez, Brother Love, Katharine Heller, and Newsy
New Madden! New VR mini golf course! And the games never stop!!! On this final Robert Alvarez re-listen, we also check in with co-guests Rockstar Brother Love, “HellKat” Katharine Heller, and Bad Boy Newsy thanks to listener-producers Shahrum & Heather, who cast this very episode. Before the…
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3993: The Psychic and the Poltergeist w/ Robert Alvarez
12 years later, The Psychic Witch Robert Alvarez returns, this time over video during COVID; but still, nothing can slow him down (even the poltergeist he apparently lives with). Keith and Chemda catch up on Robert’s life, learn the future of their own lives, and get even more personal with The...
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3992: House of the Dragons w/ Robert Alvarez and Jeremy
It’s literally a house of dragons, silver and otherwise. Along with Robert Alvarez, Keith and Chemda are joined by their friend and cancer and lightning survivor Jeremy to cover the news of the day and the news of the future. Before that, Keith discusses his latest post-romance feelings, calling…
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3991: Keith Malley, Silver Dragon w/ Robert Alvarez
The greatest psychic ever is back! And Robert Alvarez is here too! (WINK) Keith, Chemda, and Robert join forces to figure out the future of Mike, one of their greatest interns. They also take calls, do speed-readings, and deal with April pendejos.
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3990: The KATG 76-Hour Marathon: The Witching Hour w/ Robert Alvarez and “friends”
Today we play a section from Keith and Chemda’s record-breaking 76-hour marathon featuring Witch Robert Alvarez (that’s okay to say) psychically reading in-studio guests as well as callers over the phone. From love, money, and travels to something else I’m sure, it all gets covered. Also, there’s...
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3989: Keith’s Psychic Guide w/ Robert Alvarez
It’s now 2008, and during the time when Keith and Chemda were dating, psychic witch Robert Alvarez made his second appearance. The hosts cover the previous predictions Robert has made, and they grade him accordingly. Mr. Alvarez also blesses us with more fast-paced call-in readings and, with the...
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3988: Psychic Witch w/ Robert Alvarez and JessNYC
We’re celebrating Robert Alvarez! Oh, don’t worry; he’s very much alive! (As of press time.) We’re just going to spend this week revisiting one of KATG’s greatest guests. Robert has appeared with his mystical how-ya-doin’s since 2007, and we’re gonna look back and check on his work. The beginning...
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3987: Brand New Day: Just Desserts (Keith’s Lemonade Stand)
It’s now officially been 6 months since Keith last saw his ex-girlfriend, but this got him through a rough day: “To reconnect to the person who hurt you is disrespectful to the version of you who suffered.” Enjoy.
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3986: Keith’s Dad’s Odyssey w/ Bianca Brady and Andrea Allan
Keith and Chemda were blessed with Bianca and Andrea doing book reports of Father Malley’s tomes. Today we remember His Majesty. Also God’s.
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3985: Love and Money: Lost Gold/Our Father (Who Talks to Heaven) w/ Ken Malley
(Chronic KATG Poker Champ) Keith (yes, AGAIN) shares his thoughts on his breakup now reaching its 5-month mark. He also discusses his upcoming hair metal date with the guys, his thoughts on Senator Lindsey Graham’s passing (take a guess), Christopher Nolan’s new 6-hour film The Odyssey, and New...
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3984: Play With Me w/ Katharine Heller
America celebrated her 250th birthday. And man does she look it. HELLER! Anyway, Keith is back with close friend and KATG great Katharine Heller. Katharine just returned to NYC from visiting Keith in Charlotte, and she’s ready to report on her findings. Was Keith a good host? Did Keith brag about...
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3983: Searching for “Supergirl” (My Machelle)
Keith is going to have the second person ever in his Charlotte home after over a year! How will he fare, and how is his brain mentally and otherwise? It’s all right here.
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3982: Heart and No Soul (Christios Razdajetsa) w/ Ken Malley
Turns out that Keith’s not the only writer in the Malley family. Keith and brother Ken celebrated Christmas by recalling what was found cleaning out their family home. Keith’s siblings discovered a heartbreaking story written by their Mom about her marrying a loser and ruining her life as well as...
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3981: CRYSTAL CLEAR w/ Ken Malley
More about Dad. Even less to know. HAPPY FATHER’S DAY
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3980: Peace w/ Ken Malley and Bernie Kosar
For real though, peace and love to all the good fathers out there; and to all the happy spouses, lovers, and childrens: Good for you. This is more for the rest of us. Good God.
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3979: Father’s Day (Day 1) w/ Ken Malley
In honor of the world celebrating Father’s Day, this week Keith will look back at the VIP-featured KATG spin-off show Daddy Issues which began in COVID-era 2020 with episodes that feature his youngest brother Ken trying to help make sense of their father and their upbringing. We’re happy for all…
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About this show
Keith and The Girl (est. March, 2005) is a fast-paced comedy show that talks about EVERYTHING. KATG host and Podcasting Hall of Fame inductee Keith Malley and guests talk openly about their lives including topics such as their relationships, religion and atheism, the LGBT community, love, hate, fights, racism, feminism, weed and other drug use, family, and any comfortable or uncomfortable topic.Keith creates an aggressive but safe place for his guests to share intimate and never-been-told stories and promotes a frank and hilarious atmosphere.KATG is known for its rabid and supported fan-base. In fact, over 150 audience members have tattooed and, literally, branded themselves with KATG-related body modifications. Top names in the industry credit the Keith and The Girl show for being pioneers in the podcasting world. "You guys got me started to begin with. You were the original podcasting people." -Marc Maron The show - which has been available for two decades with over 3,800 episo
Hosted by
Keith Malley