PODCAST · fiction
Mall Brats
by Pickaxe
Mall Brats is an RPG podcast that’s like if Gangs of New York was a Saturday morning cartoon set in a magical 1980s mega mall. Countless kid gangs make their living in the mall pulling off schemes, selling candy, and causing trouble under the watchful eye of the mysterious Food Court. The Cool Treat Kids are the mall’s most up-and-coming gang of ne'er do wells, featuring Fenton Beasley, Franklin Stein, and Clover Ivy Fern.
Episodes
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S02E15 - Season 2 Talkback
We reminisce about our favorite parts of season 2 [Content Warning: Memories, Traumatised Kids, Letter Bombs] Want more Mall Brats in your Life? Check out our main show 👶🏼Spout Lore 👶🏼: www.spoutlore.com Subscribe to 🤩 Spout Lore 🤩: https://linktr.ee/spoutlore Get some ✨Bonus Content ✨:...
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S02E14 - All Good Blades Must Come To An End
The stakes ramp up as the Cool Treat Kids race towards the end of their conflict with the Wine Moms. [Content Warning: Little Turdlets, Big Os, Pretty Woman Copyright Infringement] Want more Mall Brats in your Life? Check out our main show 👶🏼Spout Lore 👶🏼: www.spoutlore.com Subscribe to 🤩...
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S02E13 - Killing Two Blades With One Dark
The Cool Treat Kids collect the final ingredient they need to create the fabled dankest of dark chocolates: Pinot Noir.[Content Warning: Vampires, Old People, Barbeque Dads] Want more Mall Brats in your Life? Check out our main show 👶🏼Spout Lore 👶🏼: www.spoutlore.com Subscribe to 🤩 Spout…
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S02E12 - Actions Speak Louder Than Blades
The Cool Treat Kids attempt to mend fences as they close in on the endgame of their scheme to stop the Wine Moms. [Content Warning: Secrets, Clove Cigarettes, Diarrhea] Want more Mall Brats in your Life? Check out our main show 👶🏼Spout Lore 👶🏼: www.spoutlore.com Subscribe to 🤩 Spout Lore 🤩:...
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S02E11 - Jack of all Blades, Master of None
The cool treat kids unwind after their most recent job as any fantasy adventurer would, with a sweet glow in the dark party.[Content Warning: Warm Beers, Flaming Hot Cheezos, Dance Competitions] Want more Mall Brats in your Life? Check out our main show 👶🏼Spout Lore 👶🏼: www.spoutlore.com...
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S02E10 - The Whole Nine Blades
In the thrilling conclusion to the Chocolate Factory Caper, the Cool Treat Kids learn what it truly means to Eat Pray Love.[Content Warning: Potential Goat Murder, Rim Jobs, Seathane Wycc] Want more Mall Brats in your Life? Check out our main show 👶🏼Spout Lore 👶🏼: www.spoutlore.com Subscribe…
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S02E09 - The Blade is Always Darker on the Other Side
The Cool Treat Kids and their new found ally Adric Swift penetrate deep into the chocolate factory...from the rear.[Content Warning: Achillies, Prophecies, Drunk Borblos] Want more Mall Brats in your Life? Check out our main show 👶🏼Spout Lore 👶🏼: www.spoutlore.com Subscribe to 🤩 Spout Lore…
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S02E08 - A Watched Blade Never Darks
The Cool Treat kids prep for their excursion into the Chocolate Factory. More importantly though, they experience the wonders of a motel continental breakfast. [Content Warning: Seathane, Fucking, Wyck] Want more Mall Brats in your Life? Check out our main show 👶🏼Spout Lore 👶🏼:...
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S02E07 - The Squeaky Blade Gets The Dark
The Cool Treat Kids take the unprecedented step of leaving the mall and cross paths with a character ripped directly from Shawn's high school Dungeons and Dragons character notes. [Content Warning: Horses, Wolves, Sunlight] Want more Mall Brats in your Life? Check out our main show 👶🏼Spout Lore...
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S02E06 - The Blade is Mightier Than The Dark
The Cool Treat Kids spend their downtime recovering from their failure infiltrating Tina Durger's organization, and planning their next move in saving their home. [Content Warning: Good Will Hunting Copyright Infringement, Barely Repressed Trauma, RATHGAR THE NIGHT BLADE] Want more Mall Brats in...
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S02E05 - Kids who Live in Candy Glass Houses Should Not Throw Blades
The Cool Treat Kids infiltrate Tina Durger's speakeasy, The Nog Hole, in a frantic effort to figure out what the fuck a condominium is. [Content Warning: Pant Disguises, Daniel Day Lewis Plagiarism, Post Credits Scenes] Want more Mall Brats in your Life? Check out our main show 👶🏼Spout Lore…
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S02E04 - The Journey of a Thousand Blades Begins With a Single Dark
The Cool Treat Kids face the consequences of their vendetta against Kesserin Ropes and look to enlist the help of their friends in dealing with it. [Content Warning: Papooses, Triple Dates, Fifth Wheels] Want more Mall Brats in your Life? Check out our main show 👶🏼Spout Lore 👶🏼:...
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S02E03 - You Can't Judge a Blade by it's Clover
The Cool Treat Kids continue to ignore the impending re-development of the Sugar Shack and focus instead on their revenge scheme and the upcoming Sadie Hawkins dance.[Content Warning: Bat Man, Bat Man, Bat Man, Bat Man, Bat Man, Bat Man, Bat Man, Bat...Man, Bat Man?] Want more Mall Brats in your...
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S02E02 - Fortune Favours the Blade
Despite Clover's fugitive status and the impending plans to re-develop the Sugar Shack the Cool Treat Kids dedicate themselves to breaking up Kesserin and Shamus in the most elaborate and chaotic way possible. [Content Warning: Sour Cream, Hauntings, Beefy Randy] Want more Mall Brats in your…
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S02E01 - Good Things Come to Those Who Blade
The Cool Treat Kids deal with the fallout of Clover's status as a fugitive, and the cast continues to violate copyrights for early '00s emo music. [Content Warning: Improvised Funerals, Dashboard Confessionals, Tunnels] Want more Mall Brats in your Life? Check out our main show 👶🏼Spout Lore…
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HUGE ANNOUNCEMENT! SUMMER OF YOUTUBE!
This summer (June 1st to 30th) we're making all of our video episodes available to ALL of our listeners! Click the link below and head over to YouTube to get all that video goodness and please help us game the algorithm by making sure you like, comment and subscribe! If enough of you amazing…
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S01E21 - Season 1 Cast Talkback
The cast reflect on all the things they loved about Season 1. [Content Warning: Cougars, King Charles, and Pedro Pascal's Thick Digits] Want more Mall Brats in your Life? Check out our main show 👶🏼Spout Lore 👶🏼: www.spoutlore.com Subscribe to 🤩 Spout Lore 🤩: https://linktr.ee/spoutlore Get...
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S01E20 - Don't Bite the Blade That Feeds You
The Cool Treat Kids face their biggest obstacle to date...the consequences of their actions. [Content Warning: Failures, Fires, Liberal Use of New Jersey Accents] Want more Mall Brats in your Life? Check out our main show 👶🏼Spout Lore 👶🏼: www.spoutlore.com Subscribe to 🤩 Spout Lore 🤩:...
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S01E19 - You Can Catch More Blades With Nog Than You Can With Vinegar
The Cool Treat Kids jump into their new feud with the Wild Nogs with the reckless abandon of a bunch of orphans with infinite access to sugar. [Content Warning: Dumpster Fires, Kid Fights, Allison] Want more Mall Brats in your Life? Check out our main show 👶🏼Spout Lore 👶🏼: www.spoutlore.com...
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S01E18 - A Rolling Blade Gathers No Dark
It's once again Charles Eve at the High Spear Mall and The Cool Treat Kids start to butt heads with the Wild Nogs. [Content Warning: Mortgage Brokers, Sweater Vests, Sensitive French Boys] Want more Mall Brats in your Life? Check out our main show 👶🏼Spout Lore 👶🏼: www.spoutlore.com Subscribe…
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S01E17 - A Blade a Day Keeps the Dark Away
The Cool Treat Kids find themselves in a thrilling race against time as Hot Meat Boy activities put their whole plan at the My Alchemical Romance concert at risk. [Content Warning: Danny, The Hawk, Taburno] Want more Mall Brats in your Life? Check out our main show 👶🏼Spout Lore 👶🏼:...
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S01E16 - Blades of a Feather Dark Together
The Cool Treat Kids have arrived at the My Alchemical Romance concert with their dates and things go sideways pretty much immediately. [Content Warning: Lies, Lies, Carbonated Sauces, Lies] Want more Mall Brats in your Life? Check out our main show 👶🏼Spout Lore 👶🏼: www.spoutlore.com Subscribe...
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S01E15 - There are Plenty of Other Blades in the Dark
Now that the Cool Treat Kids have determined the identity of their patron they turn their attention to more important matters....getting dates to a My Alchemical Romance concert. [Content Warning: Goth Kid, Vampire Boy, Janitor Girl] Want more Mall Brats in your Life? Check out our main show...
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S01E14 - Let Sleeping Blades Lie
The Cool Treat Kids inch ever closer to discovering the identity of their patron as Clover inches ever closer to Seamus. [Content Warning: Vampire Physiology, Tinsel Resale, Alien Antfarm] Want more Mall Brats in your Life? Check out our main show 👶🏼Spout Lore 👶🏼: www.spoutlore.com Subscribe…
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S01E13 - A Picture is Worth a Thousand Blades
The Cool Treat Kids infiltrate the hide-out of the Barbeque Kings and get closer to tracking down the Mall Charles and saving Charles Eve. [Content Warning: Dad Stereotypes, Mom Stereotypes, Toilet Kids] Want more Mall Brats in your Life? Check out our main show 👶🏼Spout Lore 👶🏼:...
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S01E12 - The Early Blade Gets The Dark
The cool treat kids get one step closer to tracking down the missing Mall Charles and we discover that Abdul is incapable of drawing a six segment pie. [Content Warning: Mia, Mike, Earl] Want more Mall Brats in your Life? Check out our main show 👶🏼Spout Lore 👶🏼: www.spoutlore.com Subscribe to...
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S01E11 - Idle Blades are the Devil’s Playthings
Also, we did so much worldbuilding while we were improvising Charles Eve songs that I had to leave all the 80s music in. [Content Warning: Copyright Infringement, Klepto Santa, Irresponsible Dads] Want more Mall Brats in your Life? Check out our main show 👶🏼Spout Lore 👶🏼: www.spoutlore.com...
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S01E10 - Absence Makes the Blade Grow Darker
All hallow be to the Rat Man, our lord and savior. [Content Warning: High Balling, Gym Teachers, Bike Kids] Want more Mall Brats in your Life? Check out our main show 👶🏼Spout Lore 👶🏼: www.spoutlore.com Subscribe to 🤩 Spout Lore 🤩: https://linktr.ee/spoutlore Get some ✨Bonus Content ✨:...
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S01E09 - Don't Throw the Blade Out With the Bathwater
In the second piece of the Big Market trilogy, the Cool Treat Kids do their best to ferment rebellion, break a fridge and permanently maim a glee club. Also, Borbo gives the kids "The Talk" ... certainly nothing could go wrong there. [Content Warning: Derivative Jazz Hands, Budding Bromances,...
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S01E08 - Would a Blade By Any Other Name Smell as Dark?
The Cool Treat Kids throw themselves into Big Market with the wild abandon of a group of feral mall dwelling street rats who eat too much sugar and have too little adult supervision. [Content Warning: Misused Swears, Risky Letters, Squares] Want more Mall Brats in your Life? Check out our main…
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S01E07 - Don't Count Your Blades Before They're Dark
Big Market has arrived at the Highspear Mall and the Cool Treat Kids are trying their best to scam some hard currency out of the shoppers. [Content Warning: Chocolate Tantrums, Anatomically Incorrect Vampire Sex, Greff Smushlin] Want more Mall Brats in your Life? Check out our main show 👶🏼Spout...
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S01E06 - You Can Lead a Blade to Water, But You Can't Make it Dark
The Cool Treat Kids sneak into the fancy part of the water park and match wits against the Hot Meat Boys. [Content Warning: Monica, Erica, Rita, Tina, Sandra] Want more Mall Brats in your Life? Check out our main show 👶🏼Spout Lore 👶🏼: www.spoutlore.com Subscribe to 🤩 Spout Lore 🤩:...
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BONUS - Episode 0: Character Creation
Shawn guides Jessica, Paul and Abdul through the process of creating the characters of Clover, Franklin and Fenton. [Content Warning: Clover Ivy Fern, Franklin Stein, Fenton Beasley] Want more Mall Brats in your Life? Check out our main show 👶🏼Spout Lore 👶🏼: www.spoutlore.com Subscribe to 🤩...
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S01E05 - Don't Look a Gift Blade in the Dark
The cool treat kids find themselves in competition with another gang over some choice territory. [Content Warning: Hob Noblins, Hob Goblins, Knob Gobblin] Want more Mall Brats in your Life? Check out our main show 👶🏼Spout Lore 👶🏼: www.spoutlore.com Subscribe to 🤩 Spout Lore 🤩:...
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S01E04 - Stuck Between a Blade and a Dark Place
The Cool Treat Kids face the consequences of their actions as they reckon with mall cops, their vices, and hobnoblins. [Content Warning: Fight Dancing, Weird Mushrooms, Toblerone Jones] Want more Mall Brats in your Life? Check out our main show 👶🏼Spout Lore 👶🏼: www.spoutlore.com Subscribe to…
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S01E03 - Many Blades Make Dark Work
The Cool Treat Kids find themselves "invited" to the social event of the season. That's right - Jemsie Cobblington's birthday party. I know.....I KNOW. [Content Warning: Toilet Fountains, DJs, Underage Drinking] Want more Mall Brats in your Life? Check out our main show 👶🏼Spout Lore 👶🏼:...
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S01E02 - A Blade in the Hand is Worth Two in the Dark
The Cool Treat Kids take advantage of some downtime to explore some mysteries and expand their criminal enterprise. [Content Warning: CORB GREEEN, HALFLING DETECTIVE] Want more Mall Brats in your Life? Check out our main show 👶🏼Spout Lore 👶🏼: www.spoutlore.com Subscribe to 🤩 Spout Lore 🤩:...
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S01E01 - Batter's Up
The Cool Treat Kids take their very first steps into a very large mall. Join Fenton, Clover and Franklin as they smash their way into the criminal underworld of the Highspear mall. [Content Warning: Amusement Parks, Love Triangles, Corn Dogs] Want more Mall Brats in your Life? Check out our main...
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Mall Brats Trailer
Do you remember how it felt hanging out with your friends at the mall as a kid? The feeling that anything is possible and anything could happen, and the feeling like the best day of your life could last forever? That’s what Mall Brats is about. It’s about that sunny afternoon in the middle of...
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ABOUT THIS SHOW
Mall Brats is an RPG podcast that’s like if Gangs of New York was a Saturday morning cartoon set in a magical 1980s mega mall. Countless kid gangs make their living in the mall pulling off schemes, selling candy, and causing trouble under the watchful eye of the mysterious Food Court. The Cool Treat Kids are the mall’s most up-and-coming gang of ne'er do wells, featuring Fenton Beasley, Franklin Stein, and Clover Ivy Fern.
HOSTED BY
Pickaxe
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Frequently Asked Questions
How many episodes does Mall Brats have?
Mall Brats currently has 39 episodes available on PodParley. New episodes are automatically indexed when they're published to the podcast feed.
What is Mall Brats about?
Mall Brats is an RPG podcast that’s like if Gangs of New York was a Saturday morning cartoon set in a magical 1980s mega mall. Countless kid gangs make their living in the mall pulling off schemes, selling candy, and causing trouble under the watchful eye of the mysterious Food Court. The Cool...
How often does Mall Brats release new episodes?
Mall Brats has 39 episodes. Check the episode list to see recent publication dates and frequency.
Where can I listen to Mall Brats?
You can listen to Mall Brats on PodParley by clicking any episode. We provide an embedded audio player for direct listening, and you can also subscribe via your preferred podcast app using the RSS feed.
Who hosts Mall Brats?
Mall Brats is created and hosted by Pickaxe.
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