PODCAST · business
Mom Founder Imagination Hub
by Melissa Llarena
Welcome to the Mom Founder Imagination Hub (formerly Unimaginable Wellness), your weekly podcast to inspire you to dream bigger in business, plan how and who can help you get to that next level, find the energy to keep going, and make sure your creative juices are flowing so that you can get what you really want rather than having to settle. Get ready to discover how successful mom founders here on this podcast have reimagined entrepreneurship and motherhood. Ever wonder how they do it? Tune in to find out. And stretch yourself by also learning from diverse entrepreneurs who might not be moms but who have lessons you can tailor about how you can disrupt industries and step way outside of your comfort zone. I believe every mom's superpower is her imagination. In this podcast, I'm going to give you the mindset, methods, and tools to unleash yours.I'm your host Melissa Llarena a mom to three high-energy boys and an entrepreneur since 2011. I carried my firstborn in my Ergobaby to my
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274: Seasoned with Imagination: Crystal Diaz on Sofrito, Kitchen Creativity & Puerto Rican Culture
What does sofrito—a base of herbs and spices used in Puerto Rican cooking—have to do with reimagining business, food security, and conveying a history lesson about a rich and sometimes complex culture? For today's guest, it's everything. If you've ever wondered how to weave your culture, creativity, and calling into one powerful movement... then this episode is the recipe you've been looking for. In this episode, you will hear: Food has a cultural foundation passed through generations. Cultural identity can be preserved and taught through everyday meals. How to make the best sofrito if you don't have time to cook. Food is more than just food – it's heritage, intention, and a story. The story of the Puerto Rican pasteles is shared. Food choices are power moves, shaping local or global economies. Imagination makes it possible to wear multiple hats and still stay rooted in purpose. You don't need permission to do things differently, just the will and a plan. This episode is brought to you by Fertile Imagination: A Guide for Stretching Every Mom's Superpower for Maximum Impact by Melissa Llarena Audible Audio Edition: https://www.amazon.com/Fertile-Imagination-Stretching-Superpower-Maximum/dp/B0CY9BZH9W/ref=tmm_aud_swatch_0 Paperback: https://www.amazon.com/Fertile-Imagination-Stretching-Superpower-Maximum/dp/B0CK2ZSMLB Hardcover: https://www.amazon.com/Fertile-Imagination-Stretching-Superpower-Maximum/dp/B0D5B64347/ref=tmm_hrd_swatch_0 Or, download a free chapter at fertileideas.com About Crystal Diaz Crystal Díaz has spent nearly two decades at the intersection of food, marketing, and cultural advocacy. She co-founded PRoduce, Puerto Rico's digital marketplace for locally grown food. Crystal is also the force behind El Pretexto, the island's first culinary farm lodge, where food and imagination meet 2,600 feet above sea level. A committed advocate for food security, she collaborates with Espacios Abiertos to advance agricultural policy. Crystal holds two master's degrees, including one in Food Studies from NYU. She's been recognized by Fast Company and El Nuevo Día for her creative leadership and impact in the local food movement. Quotes that can change your perspective: "If you really want to learn about something and you're obsessed about it, there's always ways to learn, to make it happen." – Crystal Díaz "With every single meal that we do, with every single snack, everything that we eat, you are impacting economies. And if you want to support your local communities and you want to see them, everybody having a better life, you might want to spend that dollar closer home and making sure that all of the ingredients that are on that food are closer to home so that money stays closer to home." – Crystal Díaz "Sofrito is very personal. You know? It's part of how your family has done it… but also learn that there is a lot of history into it. It's not something that we do because we do it. There is a lot of history to it." – Crystal Díaz "We are on a little island. We don't have that much territorial extension, so we can't think about our agriculture as other countries that have large extensions of terrains and flats and stuff like that. We need to think about it differently." – Crystal Díaz "Puerto Rican food is full of history, is complex enough, is flavorful enough, and varied… so I can pull something like this [a culinary farm lodge] up in Puerto Rico." – Crystal Díaz SHARE this episode with fellow food lovers, cultural storytellers, and moms on a mission to raise rooted kids. Crystal's insights on local food, identity, and imagination will inspire anyone looking to nourish their family and community from the inside out. Let's keep our culture alive—one pastel, one sofrito, and one big idea at a time. Supporting Resources: Website: https://www.elpretextopr.com Instagram: https://www.instagram.com/elpretextopr Facebook: https://m.facebook.com/@elpretextopr/ Subscribe and Review Have you subscribed to my podcast for new moms who are entrepreneurs, founders, and creators? I'd love for you to subscribe if you haven't yet. I'd love it even more if you could drop a review or 5-star rating over on Apple Podcasts. Simply select "Ratings and Reviews" and "Write a Review" then a quick line with your favorite part of the episode. It only takes a second and it helps spread the word about the podcast for writer moms. About Fertile Imagination You can be a great mom without giving up, shrinking, or hiding your dreams. There's flexibility in how you pursue anything – your role, your lifestyle, and your personal and professional goals. The limitations on your dreams are waiting to be shattered. It's time to see and seize what's beyond your gaze. Let's bridge your childhood daydreams with your grown-up realities. Imagine skipping with your kids along any path – you, surpassing your milestones while your kids are reaching theirs. There's only one superpower versatile enough to stretch your thinking beyond what's been done before: a Fertile Imagination. It's like kryptonite for impostor syndrome and feeling stuck when it's alert! In Fertile Imagination, you will awaken your sleeping source of creative solutions. If you can wake up a toddler or a groggy middle schooler, then together with the stories in this book – featuring 25 guests from my podcast Unimaginable Wellness, proven tools, and personal anecdotes – we will wake up your former playmate: your imagination! Advance Praise "You'll find reality-based strategies for imagining your own imperfect, fulfilling life in this book!" —MARTHA HENNESSEY, former NH State Senator "Melissa invites the reader into a personal and deep journey about topics that are crucially important to uncover what would make a mom (and dad too) truly happy to work on…even after the kids are in bed." —KEN HONDA, best-selling author of Happy Money "This book is a great purchase for moms in every stage of life. Melissa is like a great friend, honest and wise and funny, telling you about her life and asking you to reflect on yours." —MAUREEN TURNER CAREY, librarian in Austin, TX TRANSCRIPT 00:00:00 Crystal: Come up with ideas to make it easier for food producers to produce more food because we are in a little island. We don't have that much territorial extension. So we can't think about our agriculture as other countries that have large extensions of terrains and flats and stuff like that. We need to think it differently. 00:00:25 Melissa: Welcome to the Mom Founder Imagination Hub, your weekly podcast to inspire you to dream bigger. Plan out how you're gonna get to that next level in business, find the energy to keep going, and make sure your creative juices are flowing so that this way you get what you really want rather than having to settle. Get ready to discover founders have reimagined entrepreneurship and motherhood. 00:00:47 Melissa: Ever wonder how they do it? Tune in to find out, and stretch yourself by also learning from diverse entrepreneurs who might not be moms, but who have lessons you can tailor about how you can disrupt industries and step way outside of your comfort zone. I believe every mom's superpower is her imagination. In this podcast, I'm gonna give you the mindset, methods, and tools to unleash yours. Sounds good? Then keep listening. 00:01:17 Melissa: So what does sofrito, which is essentially a base of herbs and spices used in Puerto Rican cooking, have to do with reimagining business, food security, and passing along really critical history lessons. Well, for today's guest, it is everything. And if you've ever wondered how to weave your culture, creativity, and calling into one powerful movement, then this episode is the recipe you've been looking for. 00:01:49 Melissa: Welcome to the Mom Founder Imagination Hub. This is your weekly podcast designed to inspire you to dream bigger in your business and your life. Also, to help you find the energy to keep going because how are you going to sustain what's necessary to be big and to keep your imagination flowing so that this way you could feel inspired, lit up like a Christmas tree or Hanukkah candles. I'm your host Melissa Llarena. 00:02:17 Melissa: I'm a mom of three high energy boys. No. They did not get their energy from me. Psyched. They did. I'm also a best selling author of Fertile Imagination and an imagination coach for mom founders who are reimagining what success and motherhood can look like on their own terms, and that's really important. 00:02:34 Melissa: Now, if you've ever stirred a pot of sofrito, you already know this. Right? You know that the blend of flavors tells a deeper story. It tells a story that sometimes has made its way across generations. It preserves a culture, and it does nourish more than just our baby's bellies. 00:02:56 Melissa: So today's guest, I am thrilled to invite Crystal Diaz. Now she's taken the same approach in terms of her business ventures. She's a foodpreneur, culture keeper, I love that, and community builder. She wears four hats and in today's episode we're gonna go through each of those hats. One of which is as the owner of El Pretexto, i.e. The Excuse, a culinary farm lodge in the countryside of Puerto Rico where she serves 100% locally sourced meals and lives her mission every day. 00:03:33 Melissa: She has lots of degrees and an MA in food studies from NYU, which is why if you're watching the video, you could see, I hope, my NYU t-shirt. Hit subscribe if you see it and you love it. Subscribe on YouTube. Hit follow on this podcast. 00:03:53 Melissa: A little bit more about Crystal. She was recognized by Fast Company as one of the most creative people in business in 2022 and was named one of El Nuevo Diaz women of the year in 2023. She's the real deal. In this episode, we're gonna explore how Crystal uses her imagination as her main ingredient, whether it's in terms of the way that she's carving away for Puerto Rico to have its own food centric cultural immersive experience or even by how she decided to commute to NYU from San Juan every single week, which was creative in and of itself, or even in terms of the way that she describes the depth of a very famous Puerto Rican dish. 00:04:43 Melissa: Oh, and side note, I actually have her real life best on the planet, sofrito recipe. My gosh, do not run away, For sure. Check out the sofrito recipe we articulated in this conversation. You're gonna walk away with yummy ideas for how to use your own imagination to nourish your business, your family, and community, and it's gonna be so important even if you're not working in food. 00:05:13 Melissa: So before we dig in, I would appreciate if you hit follow, if you're listening to this on iTunes. Why hit follow? Because every time someone hits follow on iTunes, it tells me that I need to bring more guests with stories like this to the podcast. And I get really excited and when a mom is excited, it is a very good day in her entire home. So go ahead, hit follow. You will absolutely get that dopamine hit that everybody needs or if you're watching this on YouTube, then hit subscribe. I would be so appreciative and again, I will do the dance of joy. Okay. So enjoy the conversation. 00:05:54 Melissa: Crystal Diaz, thank you so much for this conversation on the Mom Founder Imagination hub. We are delighted to have you here. Crystal, just to kind of set off the scenery, why don't you explain to us where you are in Puerto Rico? What's outside your windows? 00:06:10 Crystal: All right. Well, let's… our imagination hub in a car. We are in San Juan, and you drove forty five minutes south, up to the mountains. Now we are in Cayey. I am at El Pretexto, which is also my home, and we are overlooking… we're up in the mountains, 2,600 feet over sea level, overlooking the Caribbean Sea at the south, and all the mountains slowly winding down all the way to the coast. 00:06:43 Crystal: And you will have some crazy chickens surrounding you. In my patio while you are probably sipping a wine or a coffee, depending on the time of the day. Enjoying the view and, surrounded by trees, lush greenery all over the place. And there are gardens on your side, also as well. So you are surrounded definitely by nature and you feel at peace. That's where we are. 00:07:15 Melissa: Oh, okay. Cool. So let's bring that sense of peace to this conversation. I am excited because I'm sure any listener right now who is a mom, has a business, might feel a little frazzled now and again. But right now, for the next thirty minutes, this is a peaceful zone. We are in Puerto Rico right now. 00:07:37 Melissa: Okay. So, Crystal, now I'm gonna ask you an obvious question, as you just described what you are surrounded by in Puerto Rico. But you attended NYU, and I'm just kind of super curious. You could have stayed in New York, let's say. Right? You could have been like this chef at a restaurant in New York City, Michelin star, etcetera, etcetera. But you decided to return home. And so I'm just curious, like, what informed that decision? 00:08:13 Crystal: Well, you will be surprised with my answer because I never left home. I commuted every single week to New York. Coming on to the city, take my classes, back to my home. So for two years, I was traveling every week to New York for one day. 00:08:34 Melissa: Oh my gosh. Yeah. That is so surprising. Okay. So now I'm just curious here. Okay. So you were on a plane. So, usually people complain about their commute. Right? 00:08:48 Crystal: Uh-huh. 00:08:49 Melissa: They have this whole return to work aggravation. Here you are getting on a plane every single week to take courses at NYU. So then let me ask you this other question. So I know that it's a little off track, but now I'm just way curious. Why did it have to be NYU? That's quite the pull. 00:09:13 Crystal: Yeah. Well, my background is in marketing, and I have a BA in Marketing with a Minor in Advertising and Public Relations. Then I worked with a newspaper for fourteen years. So my background is all about business and marketing. Then I did a first master degree here in Puerto Rico, in the University of Puerto Rico, about cultural action and management. And then, I wanted – because at this point, I believe that I am not passionate anymore. I am kind of obsessed with food, and I guess we will get into that later. 00:09:58 Crystal: But, I wanted to learn the policy part of it. And in Puerto Rico, we don't have any program in any of the universities nor public or private, specifically about food, and way less food policies and advocacy and that type of perspective on the food system, which is what I wanted to learn. So that's why I ended up in New York. I decided to do this because it's a direct flight. So it's gonna be a three hours and a half flight going in, then the one hour in the A train until Westport. 00:10:49 Crystal: Even though I know it's intense, it was pretty straightforward. You don't have make a stop then take another plane. And I was studying and reading all my plane hours, so there's no excuse to not complete your assignments, I guess. 00:11:07 Melissa: Yeah. I love that. Okay. So, hey, that is 100% using your imagination because I think a lot of us, myself included, I wouldn't have considered that to be an option in my mind. I still don't. Right? It's gotta be a certain set of circumstances that make that a possibility. But, I love that now that's an idea that we just planted in someone's head. Right? If they really are obsessed. Right? 00:11:35 Crystal: And if you really want to learn about something and you're obsessed about it, there's always ways to learn, to make it happen. And to my point, New York is so expensive that I spend way less money in flight tickets than actually living there. 00:11:56 Melissa: Yeah. That makes a lot of sense. Okay. So this is really interesting. Okay. So you could have stayed in New York, but you didn't even choose to stay in New York when you were taking classes at NYU. So now you have the whole, like… that's just so that's fascinating, Crystal. You really gobsmacked me right now with that piece of information. 00:12:18 Melissa: So along the same lines of using your imagination and thinking totally out of the box, let me ask you this one question. So, El Pretexto, of course, we'll go into what it is and all of that. But I also wanna understand because on your website, you say that you've traveled the world. Right? So you've seen all these different culinary experiences. And using your imagination and imagining where or how would you imagine Puerto Rico's cuisine fitting into the landscape of world gastro– I can't say the rest of that word, but I know it's a real word. 00:12:57 Crystal: Yes. Well, for me, I love to travel. I am a girl of no luxuries. Right? I don't care about purses or new shoes or jewelry. It's like I don't judge, but I don't care. So where I spend my money and my time, which I can't… money, you can recover it somehow, but time is just one time. You just have every minute that you have. 00:13:27 Crystal: And I like to spend those traveling and getting to know other cultures and exposing myself to other cultures. And I think that those travels have pushed me to understand and appreciate what we have back here at home and also understand the opportunities that we have back here at home. Not everybody is doing it perfectly, but you can definitely learn how it is done in other places. And I'm talking generally. Right? Depending on what you are interested. 00:14:01 Crystal: But you always learn of how the world do things in other places. So, I in my case, I love food and I try to expose myself, not only to eating in good restaurants or good food, but I love to go to markets. I even go to supermarkets every time I travel. I like to visit farms and I noticed, especially in Mexico, you can see this – Peru is developing this a lot and Italy has it all set. 00:14:40 Melissa: On lockdown. 00:14:41 Crystal: But you have these culinary experiences where you get to… expose to their cuisine, with a local chef and and you go to their farmers' markets and you get the whole country but with a special focus in food. And I was like, "You know what? Puerto Rican food is full of history, is complex enough, is flavorful enough, and varied so I can pull something like this up in Puerto Rico." So that's how one of our offerings about the curated food experiences came to be because I was sure that somebody will have the curiosity to get to know Puerto Rico from its food. 00:15:33 Crystal: So that's how I got into there. And I think that because I am obsessed with the fact that Puerto Rico imports 90% of everything that we eat, I am then focused on cherish and enhance and share that 10% what it can be if we actually put a lot of effort into grow that 10% into 20%, let's say. 00:16:08 Melissa: That's interesting. So okay. So, I mean, I'm not cynical, but, in my opinion, I kind of believe that the person that controls food source kinda controls a lot. And that's not fantastic. And so I'm just wondering from a policy perspective and as you think about this share of stomach or however it's really considered, are you also part of that conversation too? Like, are you actively advocating for that too? 00:16:45 Crystal: Yes. Yes. I always say I have a couple of hats for all those also thinking that you only have to do one thing and one thing only. If you want to do one thing and one thing only, that's okay. But in my case, I am focused on food, but I try to deal with it from different perspectives. So I have four hats. 00:17:09 Crystal: And one of my hats, specifically works with food policy advocacy. And we try to understand the local food policies that are in place, understanding what programs work, what programs doesn't work, and then trying to make it as… to come up with ideas to make it easier for food producers to produce more food. 00:17:41 Crystal: Because we are in a little island. We don't have that much territorial extension, so we can't think about our agriculture as other countries that have large extensions of terrains and flats and stuff like that. We need to think it differently. And I am not against importation. We all have globalized diets, and we love olive oil, and we can't produce that in Puerto Rico. And we love wine, and we can't produce that in Puerto Rico. 00:18:16 Crystal: So it's not like, all the way 100%. That's not what I mean. But definitely, we should aim to have, let's say, half of our stomach-share full of food that is produced locally. Not only because of its nutritional value, but also because it means economic growth and development for our island and our local communities. So every dollar that you spend on food… somebody might be hearing us while they are eating something. 00:18:55 Crystal: So you imagine whatever you're eating right now, let's say it cost you $1. It depends on where the ingredients came from, that dollar went to that place. It depends on where it was processed, part of that dollar went to that place. And then if you bought it in the supermarket or if you bought it in Amazon, to who you gave that share of that dollar. 00:22 Crystal: So with every single meal that we do, with every single snack, everything that we eat, you are impacting economies. And if you want to support your local communities and you want to see them, everybody having a better life, you might want to spend that dollar closer home and making sure that all of the ingredients that are on that food are closer to home so that money stays closer to home. And that's how I see it. 00:19:58 Crystal: How do we make that that share of that dollar that we as consumers have the power to choose where it goes. And, by the way, there are some parts that we have the power and some part we don't have the power. I understand that. But how do we make an effort in whatever way we can to stay as close as possible to our home. 00:20:24 Melissa: So I think you said that… was that one out of your four hats? 00:20:28 Crystal: Yes. 00:20:29 Melissa: What are the other three? 00:20:30 Crystal: Well, El Pretexto, which is a bed and breakfast, is our Puerto Rico's first and only culinary farm lodge. This is my home, but I also welcome guests here. So El Pretexto is my second one. I'm the co-founder of PRoduct, which is a digital marketplace that connects local food producers with consumers directly. We're trying to shorten that food chain and make it easier and convenient to get local products on your home. We deliver island wide. So that's my third hat. And then I have a super small, digital, marketing agency with another partner, and it's all focused on food and beverage. So everything is about food but from different perspectives. 00:21:25 Melissa: Yeah. That's so interesting because it's almost like you have a little supply chain kind of going on. Right? It's like we've got a lot going on, but it's all related to eating, which is essential. But I think it's smart. I mean, you have your little niche there. Huge niche. We keep being hungry, so you're in a good spot, I would say. 00:21:49 Melissa: So let me understand this idea about food and how you saw it as an opportunity for Puerto Rico because it has a rich history. Right? So me as a mom, for example, I'm second generation from a Puerto Rican perspective. As a mom, for me, passing down culture is urgent. It's almost on the verge of extinction, I feel, because of where I am generationally. Like, I'm, quote, unquote, "amongst people that I know I'm not," quote, unquote, "supposed to know Spanish." I'm not, quote, unquote, "supposed to literally make rice and beans every day," which by the way, I don't have to. But my goodness, my children really like their rice and beans. And I am so lazy. So that is all I make because I just want one pot. 00:22:40 Melissa: But anyway, so culture, food, that's the one way that I pass it along. Right? You are what you eat. So guess what? My kids are Puerto Rican and Cuban, at this stage. Yes. They have Dominican in them, but, hey, that's just my culinary preference. So tell me about this idea of culture, Puerto Rican culture. And I would be super curious if you could maybe choose an example of a cuisine or food and just kind of walk us through how that kind of expresses culture or maybe there's a story behind it that is unique to Puerto Rico. 00:23:20 Crystal: Well, for me and my mentor used to be doctor Cruz Miguel Ortiz Cuadra, which was the only food historian in Puerto Rico. He passed two years ago, but I learned so much from him and pretty much I was his daughter. He inherit me all his library, which I have here, home. And, so we discussed this a lot. And I think that we both shared that the ultimate dish that represents the Puerto Rican culture will be the pasteles. For those that doesn't know what a pastel is, it's a tamal like preparation. But the tamales are corn based and they use corn leaves to wrap it up. The pasteles puertorriqueños is made out of a dough made out of root vegetables mainly. 00:24:20 Crystal: It will have bananas and plantains that we got from our African in [inaudible]. It will have pumpkin, which were already with our Taino peoples here in America. It will have yautia, which also was here in Puerto Rico. And then, it will have some pork stew that was brought by the Spanish people. So you have in one dish our full heritage of the three cultures that have conformed the Puerto Rican-ness in just one dish. 00:25:01 Crystal: And then that works too will use, what is the ultimate base of flavor of the Puerto Rican cuisine, which is the sofrito. And the sofrito itself also is a blend of African, Spanish, and Taino ingredients, but it's a bricolage of flavors and smells that then go into the stew that then is used to make the pastel. And the pastel is also representative of the most authentic Puerto Rican soul because el pastel is wrapped as a gift. 00:25:40 Crystal: And if you were poor and there was a lot of poverty in Puerto Rico at some – we still have, but there used to be a lot of poverty back in the days. If you didn't have any resources, monetary resources to gift things, you will make pasteles with the things that are on your patio. You will have that growing up in your patio, in your garden, and then you will do pasteles, and you will gift that to your adult, kids, to your sisters, to your brothers. 00:26:13 Crystal: And so because it's – now we have technology, and now we can use food processors and so on. But back in the day, you had to grate that by hand. So if you have that gift, I am not only gifting you my talent and the products that I grow in my patio, but I'm also gifting my time. So it's a very meaningful way of telling someone that you really care about them. 00:26:42 Crystal: And that's all about Puerto Ricans. We care. We care a lot. We want to share everything that we have. And all the visitors that we have, they all can say that Puerto Ricans are always nice to them. Even if we have people that doesn't speak so much English, they will take you to whatever place you wanted to go, trying to understand you and enjoying our island. So I think that the pastel is representative of all the goodness of the Puerto Ricans. 00:27:16 Melissa: Let's pause for a second. If you've been nodding your head all along while listening to Crystal talk about food as fuel for imagination, then I wanna put this on your radar. My book, Fertile Imagination is for any mom who's ever thought, "I know I'm capable of more, but I don't know where to start." 00:27:39 Melissa: And as one Amazon reviewer said this of my book, Fertile Imagination, which is all about maximizing your superpower to make your maximum impact, She says this, "It's a non judgmental kick in the butt to start valuing your whole selves and to create a new reality where we combine motherhood with our big dreams. Whether you're chasing an idea during nap time or whispering your big vision," this is hilarious, "into a spatula, then this book is your creative permission slip." 00:28:17 Melissa: You're gonna hear stories, especially if you like this conversation with Crystal. You're gonna hear a story as well from a podcast guest that I had here who is a James Beard award winning chef, Gabriele Corcos. And you're gonna learn about how he has really latched on to this idea of novelty as his way to explore new categories of interest in his one beautiful life. So I want to just be sure that you realize that this conversation is the beginning of the process. I wanted you to see through Crystal how if your imagination was reawakened, you can start to reimagine how you approach your own life. And I think that's important. 00:29:04 Melissa: But then the book, Fertile Imagination, goes on and adds some tools that you can actually use to incorporate your imagination into your one divine life. And here's the thing, because you could use your imagination from any place you are in the world, you won't have to hop on a plane and go to any place. You can actually just close your eyes and replug in to the little girl that you once were who had all these beautiful ideas that you wanted to play out in the world and that's what I want for you. 00:29:41 Melissa: So here's what I have for you. Just go ahead to fertileideas.com. If you're driving, if you're running, if you're walking, you could do this in a bit. Just go to fertileideas.com and you could download a free chapter of my book, Fertile Imagination. What's really amazing about that chapter is that that chapter basically takes you to a place where you can go and travel back in time, to that moment when you were most free, to that moment where you had the world totally ahead of you and you were imagining what you wanted for your one divine life. That's what I did when I got on stage at the Magnet Theater in New York City 100 years ago now, so it feels. 00:30:25 Melissa: But I talk about that moment for me in that chapter that you can get for free right now on fertileideas.com. So back to the show. Again, shop the book. This episode is brought to you by Fertile Imagination, every mom's superpower. Go to fertileideas.com. Grab the free chapter. Why not? What are you gonna do? Have an amazing time reading a free chapter? That's the way to set yourself up for success for this summer. All right. Enjoy the rest of the conversation. 00:30:55 Melissa: I've never ever heard of un pastel in that way. I'm just like… it's fascinating because I also think it's… maybe it's just me, but I feel like there's a bit of an acquired taste to it too. Like, for me. Right? When I think about a pastel and I compare it to a tamal, I do not think about a Mexican tamal at all. I think about Cuban. I think about– 00:31:26 Crystal: Yeah. Sure. 00:31:28 Melissa: And for me, it's really fascinating to hear the story behind the pastel in the sense that it's very, very comprehensive. You could… I mean, I bet you there's probably books already. Or maybe you're gonna write a book. Maybe you got a fourth – a fifth hat to wear, right? You can write about pasteles. I mean, it's not a bad gig. 00:31:49 Melissa: But I think it's really interesting. And I think it's a testament to the fact that irrespective of where someone travels to the depth with which they can get to know and appreciate a culture is almost unlimited in a way, right? It's… like, for me and my family, I am not a Disney World person. But I've been to Disney World because it's kinda like, "Oh, we just go to Disney World and I have three kids." And you got a cat. That's a little bit of a cat. She's got a cat. If you're watching this on video, you see her big and fluffy cat. Is your cat Puerto Rican though? 00:32:29 Crystal: She is Puerto Rican. She is a sato cat. 00:32:31 Melissa: Aw. 00:32:32 Crystal: She's a rescue one. 00:32:34 Melissa: So cute. She probably eats pasteles because she's got meat on her. She's a solid cat. But, yeah, just the depth with which you could understand a culture, what I'm hearing from you, Crystal, it can absolutely include history and and careful attention to the food that you're eating. Right? I think about just everywhere that I've traveled and every time I've eaten food, it's kind of like there's almost a story or a reason for why something is on a plate, and it's not always superficial. It's not just labor profile. It could have to do with political conversations. It could have to do with whoever decided that that food would make its way to that region. 00:33:27 Melissa: But let me ask you this question then. So just to kind of close-up this conversation on something that I think is very practical, I'm gonna ask you a very selfish question. Okay, so I'm on the quest for the perfect sofrito. I'm gonna tell you what I do for my sofrito. So it's my ritual on Sundays. I take all the peppers that I find, red, green, yellow, and even orange because it comes in that pack. I also then buy cilantro. I'm in Texas, so let's just be mindful I'm limited in some of the things I can get. 00:34:05 Melissa: Also because I'm a health conscious mom, I put bone broth in the blender so that this way things can blend. Right? I put onions. I put garlic. I put some oregano. That is what's in my sofrito on a good day. Melissa's like, "Okay. I am ready to make a sofrito." How can I enhance that sofrito, or how do you teach people that visit El Pretexto how to make their own sofrito? 00:34:39 Crystal: Well, sofrito is one thing as the pasteles. Right? Everybody have their own recipe, and everybody says that their mom's sofrito is the best. Right? [inaudible] My mom's sofrito is the best. So that's the one that I do. And I'm happy to share the recipe for you because I have it written. 00:35:03 Crystal: But there are two schools of Sofrito to begin with. The school that says you do your Sofrito on a Sunday and you don't touch it… you don't do another Sofrito batch up until that one is gone in one or two weeks. And then you have my mom's school, which is you do your sofrito every time that you're gonna cook. 00:35:28 Melissa: Gotcha. Right. 00:35:31 Crystal: Obviously, that's nice for those that are retired and have all the time in the world. I do it that way. I'm not retired, but it's because I have a– 00:35:40 Melissa: That's your job. 00:35:41 Crystal: That's how she does it. And I don't want to, to your point, I want to continue her way of doing things. So, there are onions. We don't use all the colors of the bell peppers. We actually use cubanelle pepper. Onion cubanelle, then we will have the aji dulce, the sweet little pepper we need. We will have the cilantro, but we will also have culantro. [inaudible]. Yeah? And then, we will have garlic in it, a little bit of oregano, and pretty much that's the base. 00:36:29 Crystal: So depending on who you ask, there are people that will omit having the onion, and they will do it when they are cooking, if they're doing a batch. And then you will have people that will go all the way in with a lot of culantro in it, so it has that strong flavor to it. My mom's is more balanced in how much goes of each little thing in there. And we also use the bone broth, but not to blend the sofrito, but to stew the rice. If it's gonna be a stew rice, we will do bone broth instead of water with the rice. 00:37:18 Crystal: And then, the beans, we like them vegetarians. We don't use any hams or meat cuts into it. But, again, that's us. There are people that say that the most flavorful ones is with a piece of ham in it and whatever. But, I like… my mom's and mine are vegetarian. And my cat starts again. 00:37:43 Crystal: But, sofrito is is very personal. You know? It's part of how your family has done it. And as I told earlier, it's also a blend of these three cultures that goes into it. A lot of cultures have mirepoix or other type of base of flavors into their food and this is ours. So you have to make it yours but also learn that there is a lot of history into it. It's not something that we do because we do it. There is a lot of history into it. But, yeah, happy to share my mom's one with you. 00:38:29 Melissa: Yeah. For sure. Crystal, this was so amazing. So I would say around now, a lot of individuals are planning their summer holiday trips and vacations and all of that. So, maybe you can share where people can learn more about you, can learn more about El Pretexto if that's an option to them to kind of explore, and just follow your journey. 00:38:53 Crystal: Yeah. Sure. Well, a friendly reminder that it is an adults only project. So this might be your chance to… El Pretexto actually translates to "The Excuse." So this might be your excuse to having your parents take care of the kids and hop down to the island and have a little bit of a honeymoon. But, El Pretexto, you can find it at elprotextopr.com. We're also in social media @elprotextopr in Facebook and Instagram. 00:39:30 Crystal: There you will meet our chickens and photos of our garden and our harvest and the breakfast, and maybe you get a little bit hungry. In our website, you will find different options because you could come for a weekend or you could come for a weekday stay, but also you could come for these curated food experiences, which are in very specific dates around the year. We also have dinners, farm to table dinners in our property. We invite guest chefs to cook dinners, around the year. 00:40:08 Crystal: And, also, I take people to other places in the countryside to enjoy a beautiful lunch, but getting to know another piece of countryside around the island. So, El Pretexto is no other thing than the celebration of the beautiful diverse countryside of Puerto Rico. And you can check all the information there. So, yeah, feel free to follow me there. 00:40:37 Melissa: Thank you so much, Crystal. This has been amazing. Have an awesome rest of your day. Keep enjoying the peace and serenity of the mountains and the Caribbean Sea and all the beauty that you see outside your window. Thank you so much for this conversation. 00:40:53 Crystal: Thank you. Thank you for the invitation. 00:40:56 Melissa: So what's your version of a sofrito? Right? Let's take it out of the kitchen and into your home office. What sort of things for you can you put together to create your next big idea, whether it's something for business, something for your personal life or something for your family this very summer. I am so excited to have had Crystal Diaz for this conversation because I think she's inspiring all of us. She's giving us a good idea of all the ways that we could color our own individual rainbows. 00:41:33 Melissa: At the same time, I want this to just remind you that your imagination could be stirred into anything, right? Especially like tonight's dinner. So catch up on Tuesdays on the Mom Founder Imagination Hub and until then, keep cooking up ideas that only you can serve. I honestly think there's a place in this world for imaginations. And irrespective of AI and technology, at the end of the day, it's only as good as the person behind the computer screen, our prompts, our ideas, the way that we decide to use these resources. 00:42:10 Melissa: And that is the best case for you to actually keep your imagination going and playing with it. So thank you for this conversation. And again, if you are interested in learning more about the book, just go to fertileideas.com. Have an amazing rest of your day, moms.
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273: The 5 Resume Mistakes Costing You $250K in 2025
Are these 5 resume mistakes secretly slashing your shot at a $250K marketing role in 2025—while others snatch the offers you deserve? In this must-listen episode, Melissa Llarena—career coach to Fortune 500 execs—unveils the blunders sinking corporate moms and their partners in today's brutal job market. Don't get caught out—tune in and snag a free fix before March 21st! Episode Description: Struggling to land a top-tier marketing or advertising role in 2025—or know someone who is? Melissa Llarena, host since 2017 (with interviews like Beth Comstock and Gary Vee under her belt), dives back to her 2011 roots to help corporate pros thrive. After 13 years coaching agency leaders and execs—pre-Fertile Imagination fame—she's uncovered 5 resume mistakes tanking even the sharpest marketers. Burned-out CMOs, blindsided managers, and guilt-juggling leaders are scoring 15/60 on resumes when 50+ is the winning mark. In this episode, learn: The 5 resume killers—missed revenue wins, weak storytelling, and more—costing you big. How networking strategies and AI smarts flip flops into $250K offers. Why the Marketing Leader Scorecard (free till March 21st) is your DIY ticket to 50+. Melissa's also booking interview preparation services—think Last-Minute Interview Prep for video interviews and in-person interviews, or her 9-week deep dive with multi-stakeholder interviewing strategies, cross-cultural interviews, and interview presentation support. Ready to shine? Grab her free tool and fix those mistakes now! Free Download: Snag the Marketing Leader Scorecard at https://bit.ly/mlscore—free through March 21st, 2025. Score yourself across five key areas and see if you're competitive—or leaving $250K on the table. Bonus Reward: Share this episode with a friend who's struggling (partner, husband, colleague), then email Melissa at [email protected] with "I forwarded to [Friend's Name]". You'll score Boost Your Interview Answers—a PDF purchased by hundreds, loaded with proven tips to ace interviews. Plus, the first 5 forwarders get a free 15-minute resume or pitch review—booked by March 31! Keywords: Interview preparation services, interview presentation support, multi-stakeholder interviewing strategies, video interviews, in-person interviews, cross-cultural interviews, storytelling, networking strategies, resume tweaks, 2025 job market, marketing resume mistakes. Connect: Book a call for VIP accelerators: www.melissallarena.com/sessions Follow Melissa on LinkedIn: https://www.linkedin.com/in/melissallarena/ Share this episode—help a marketer win in 2025! interview preparation services,interview presentation support,multi-stakeholder interviewing strategies,video interviews,in-person interviews,cross-cultural interviews,storytelling,networking strategies,resume tweaks,2025 job market,marketing resume mistakes,job search 2025,career coaching,marketing careers,corporate moms,$250K jobs,AI job market,Fortune 500 careers,Melissa Llarena,Mom Founder Imagination Hub
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272: Most marketing execs are getting ghosted in 2025—but the ones doing THIS are getting callbacks
Landing Your Dream Marketing Role in the #RemoteEra Most marketing execs are getting ghosted in 2025—but the ones scoring Director to CMO roles are doing way more. I'll show you the exact moves that land $250K calls, even remotely. Hi, I'm Melissa Llarena, and welcome back to the podcast. For over a decade, I've helped ambitious marketing executives and advertising leaders land their dream careers through my global job search coaching firm, Career Outcomes Matter, launched in 2011. I'm back, better than ever, with strategies that work right now—and today, we're tackling how you can stand out in this cutthroat #RemoteEra or #Hybrid job market. Let's get real—this isn't your average job advice. In 2025, landing those rare, high-stakes marketing roles isn't about just sending a resume, cover letter, or even thoughtfully updating applications. It's about outworking and out-strategizing the competition. Let me ask you something to set the stage… Would YOU have stayed on the Titanic, knowing you had a chance to get off before the last lifeboat was filled? Hoping you'd survive icy waters isn't smart—and neither is letting your marketing career sink when you could turn it around. You wouldn't watch a campaign fail if you knew how to save it, right? The same goes for your career, especially in today's #RemoteEra or #Hybrid world. As a high-performing marketer or job seeker, you're in a race—and it's tougher than ever to land Director-level and above roles, especially if you're a working parent or world-class aunt eyeing flexibility. But here's the truth I've seen and helped my clients achieve: the marketers getting interviews and calls in 2025 aren't just applying—they're bringing market analysis, SOPs, portfolios, and 90–100 day plans that blow hiring leaders away. That's how you prove you're worth multiple rounds and a salary at the top end of $130K–$285K+. Imagine cutting your job search short, writing that resignation letter, and avoiding a layoff. That's the edge I give my clients—and I'm sharing it with you today." Let's get specific—here are four high-level marketing roles I know will attract top talent in 2025, where the differentiator is the candidate who brings the goods. These are the exact deliverables I've helped my clients create, present, and land with, along with quick pro tips based on what impresses hiring leaders: Headspace - Principal Brand Strategist, $130K–$183K base: Bring a one-page analysis of the mental health ecosystem—why Headspace beats Calm or other apps—and show how branding creates a utilization halo effect. Director of Marketing, Advisory Practice at Acquisition.com, Las Vegas, NV (Hybrid), $150K–$180K base: Prove you can lead with praise, not punishment, and explain how you'd contribute to Alex's $1B-plus vision in 36 months or less. SVP, Marketing Enablement at Warner Music Group, $210K–$285K base: Bring a framework showing how you'd lead a full marketing service provider audit. Chief of Staff, Marketing at IBM (Salary not posted): Dive into CMO Clay's vision—check his talks—and understand how McKinsey trains leaders, since you'll likely compete with McKinsey alums or IBM insiders. *All roles can be found on LinkedIn. They are live as of March 3rd, 2025.* These moves are what's working now to land $285K calls, even remotely. That's the 'doing more' that gets you noticed in 2025. How do I know this works? I launched Career Outcomes Matter in 2011 to coach global marketing leaders like you, wrote Fertile Imagination—a #1 Amazon bestseller in 2023—to inspire storytelling for dream careers, and I've hosted icons like Beth Comstock and GaryVee on this podcast early on. Recently, I earned my meditation certification after a two-year program to support clients through high-stress transitions. I've dedicated my life to learning and teaching the art of relationship-building—and now, I'm back with strategies that give you the edge in this brutal job market. Listen, if you're a serious marketing executive ready to stop getting ghosted and land your dream $150K+ role—or boost your income by 25%—I'm here to help. I'm enrolling a max of 10 ambitious marketing leaders into my 9-week group coaching program, starting this Sunday, March 9, 2025. It's a 2-week risk-free trial, and if you join by March 31st, I'll personally rewrite your resume or LinkedIn profile for free—that's a $1,500 value. Book a 15-minute job search fit session with me today at www.melissallarena.com/sessions. I've got tons of slots open in the next 48-hours, and I'd love to see if this is the right fit for you—or anyone you know who's frustrated with their boss, worried about layoffs, stalled on promotions, or feeling stuck. Let's turn your career into the success story it's meant to be. I'm Melissa Llarena, and I can't wait to help you win. A client was on a sinking ship in the energy sector and here's what she said about our partnership.... From A Sinking Ship Company in The Energy Sector To A Remote Strategic Partnerships Role In A Top Tier Business School I did get the offer as you know = great result!! The back-and-forth collaboration on interview questions and answers was powerful for me. I liked that you kept me accountable. I would have dragged my feet a lot longer. By investing in coaching this made me cut through my excuses and motivated me to go above and beyond by preparing for an interview 10x more than what I have ever done before. I got my dream job and the hiring manager told me how impressed everyone was and how my performance was heads above the other candidates who were MORE experienced in the function. My work is quite fun. It's rewarding work, fantastic people, ramping up some new skills and the lifestyle is to die for. Thank you, Melissa for our partnership." A 20+ year communications professional's message about what it takes to land a dream marketing job - https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=Xe7otOG-i8Y A former Volvo employee in China lands a role in the U.S. making more money than the role originally called for - https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=G2vmjc0cTcg A former tech executive who landed in a non-profit YET got a bump in pay - https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=jswvB9Km6J4 Let's hop on a 15-minute job search fit call today: https://www.melissallarena.com/sessions/ SHARE this episode with your family and friends who are currently in the job market or they keep telling you they should be out there hunting. Until next Tuesday…
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271: 30 Days to Crush Your Business Goals—Free for 15 Moms Only!
Imagine crushing your biggest business goal in just 30 days—without the burnout or mom guilt. What if you could get a $3K coaching program for free, designed exclusively for mom entrepreneurs like you? In this episode, Melissa Llarena, #1 Amazon bestselling author and mom of three, unveils an exclusive pilot program you won't want to miss—but only if you act by Friday! What You'll Discover: How 15 established business-owning moms can join Melissa's 30-Day Mompreneur Momentum Sprint—a $3,000 value, 100% free (this time only!). The secret sauce: a 30-Day Momentum Planner to laser-focus your energy, 22 live Q&A sessions (March 3-April 1, M-F 1pm CST), plus imagination tools, mindfulness hacks, and sales strategies tailored for moms. Why Jessica, a fellow mom, raves: "It infuses play and creativity while keeping it real about mom life and self-care." The catch? Only 15 spots, and the application deadline is February 28, 2025, 5pm Central. How to Apply: Head to https://bit.ly/fertilecohort now. Fill out the short app on the left (name, email, website, 50 words on why you're a fit). You'll get the planner just for applying, and if selected, next steps on March 1st. Don't wait—spots are limited! Who's This For? Mom business owners ready to level up, craving accountability, and done grinding alone. Not for the toe-dippers—this is for the committed. Take Action: Apply by Friday at https://bit.ly/fertilecohort. By April 1st, you could have real progress on your biggest goal—calmer, recharged, and guilt-free. Go now! **** Mompreneur Business coaching for moms Free coaching program 30-day business sprint Mom entrepreneur Business goals for moms Accountability for entrepreneurs Mindfulness for business owners Sales strategies for moms Melissa Llarena Mom Founder Imagination Hub Fertile Imagination Business planner for moms Cohort for mom entrepreneurs Application deadline February 28, 2025
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270: The Power of Imaginative Play: How Childhood Experiences Shape Future Founders and Leaders
How do toys shape who we become? Today, I sit down with a fascinating toy historian Chris Byrne who reveals the hidden power of play - from how different toys develop everything from relationship skills to problem - solving abilities. We explore why true play isn't about reaching an end goal, but about embracing the pure joy of the journey. Whether you're looking to understand the art of playing alongside your kids or giving them space to explore independently, this episode will transform how you think about playtime. Join us for a rich conversation about rediscovering the magic that happens when we give ourselves permission to simply play. After exploring the art of play with our toy historian today, I want to share something powerful with you. My book Fertile Imagination tackles a crucial truth: we can't guide our children toward imagination if we've lost touch with our own. I'll show you the exact framework I used to reawaken and strengthen this superpower – the same one that transformed both my life and my three sons'. If you're ready to rediscover your creativity and childlike zest for life, grab your copy now: https://bit.ly/fertilebook In this episode, you will hear: Play is a process, not a means to an end, and embracing it can reduce stress. Imagination influences every decision we make. Playing with toys helps kids develop problem-solving and relationship skills. Adults benefit from play too—it fosters creativity, joy, and innovation. Letting children lead playtime strengthens their confidence and creativity. Kids learn by doing, and unstructured play is vital for their development. In corporate settings, a playful mindset can unlock new ideas and innovation. Fear of failure limits creativity—kids don't judge play, and neither should we. This episode is brought to you by: Fertile Imagination: A Guide For Stretching Every Mom's Superpower For Maximum Impact – My book is available as a hard cover, paperback, and also as an audiobook. If you are on the go and wish to quickly jot down where you can purchase the book then head to: https://bit.ly/fertilebook. If however you want to grab the audio version then head to the show notes to click the direct Amazon link: https://www.amazon.com/Fertile-Imagination-Stretching-Superpower-Maximum/dp/B0CK2ZSMLB About Chris Bryne Chris Byrne has spent over 35 years in the toy industry, holding major marketing and creative roles before launching Byrne Communications, a consultancy specializing in product development, strategic planning, and marketing. A passionate advocate for the power of play, he has studied its impact on child development and creativity across industries. He has appeared on major media outlets worldwide, sharing insights on toys, play, and innovation. He also co-hosts The Playground Podcast, diving deep into the toy industry's past, present, and future. SHARE this episode with fellow moms and entrepreneurs who want to bring more creativity into their lives! Chris's insights on play, imagination, and innovation are a must-listen for anyone balancing motherhood and career growth. Let's embrace play, rediscover joy, and inspire the next generation! Supporting Resources: Website: https://www.thetoyguy.com/ Instagram: https://www.instagram.com/thetoyguy/ Facebook: https://www.facebook.com/thetoyguyofficial/ The Playground Podcast: Spotify & Apple Podcasts Subscribe and Review Have you subscribed to my podcast for new moms who are entrepreneurs, founders, and creators? I'd love for you to subscribe if you haven't yet. I'd love it even more if you could drop a review or 5-star rating over on Apple Podcasts. Simply select "Ratings and Reviews" and "Write a Review" then a quick line with your favorite part of the episode. It only takes a second and it helps spread the word about the podcast for writer moms. About Fertile Imagination You can be a great mom without giving up, shrinking, or hiding your dreams. There's flexibility in how you pursue anything – your role, your lifestyle, and your personal and professional goals. The limitations on your dreams are waiting to be shattered. It's time to see and seize what's beyond your gaze. Let's bridge your childhood daydreams with your grown-up realities. Imagine skipping with your kids along any path – you, surpassing your milestones while your kids are reaching theirs. There's only one superpower versatile enough to stretch your thinking beyond what's been done before: a Fertile Imagination. It's like kryptonite for impostor syndrome and feeling stuck when it's alert! In Fertile Imagination, you will awaken your sleeping source of creative solutions. If you can wake up a toddler or a groggy middle schooler, then together with the stories in this book – featuring 25 guests from my podcast Unimaginable Wellness, proven tools, and personal anecdotes – we will wake up your former playmate: your imagination! Advance Praise "You'll find reality-based strategies for imagining your own imperfect, fulfilling life in this book!" —MARTHA HENNESSEY, former NH State Senator "Melissa invites the reader into a personal and deep journey about topics that are crucially important to uncover what would make a mom (and dad too) truly happy to work on…even after the kids are in bed." —KEN HONDA, best-selling author of Happy Money "This book is a great purchase for moms in every stage of life. Melissa is like a great friend, honest and wise and funny, telling you about her life and asking you to reflect on yours." —MAUREEN TURNER CAREY, librarian in Austin, TX TRANSCRIPT 00:00:00 Chris: I really believe is what we play with as kids really becomes, we become a lot of that. And we had a basement in our house that had a room in it, that had a window in it. And my brothers and I would create puppet shows. And we would do that. And we would just go round up all the kids in the neighborhood and say, you have to watch this puppet show. And they did. I mean, they were good. But it was really about storytelling. It was about connection. It was about making things up and just feeling very alive in that moment, feeling very connected to who I was at that time and being able to share that with other people. 00:00:43 Melissa: Welcome to the Mom Founder Imagination Hub, your weekly podcast to inspire you to dream bigger. Plan out how you're going to get to that next level in business, find the energy to keep going, and make sure your creative juices are flowing so that this way you get what you really want rather than having to settle. Get ready to discover how mom founders have reimagined entrepreneurship and motherhood. Ever wonder how they do it? Tune in to find out. 00:01:09 Melissa: And stretch yourself by also learning from diverse entrepreneurs who might not be moms, but who have lessons you can tailor about how you can disrupt industries and step way outside of your comfort zone. I believe every mom's superpower is her imagination. In this podcast, I'm gonna give you the mindset, methods, and tools to unleash yours. Sounds good? Then keep listening. 00:01:36 Melissa: So how do toys shape who we become? Have you ever asked yourself that question as you are giving your child a toy? If that toy is going to influence their career choices ahead or the way that they are, their character. Today, I sat down with a fascinating toy historian, Chris Byrne. 00:02:04 Melissa: Now he is a 35 year plus veteran of the toy industry. He's held major marketing and creative positions earlier in his life. And he's appeared on TV talking about toys and play in the US and around the world. He's even been on the Live with Kelly and Mark show as a regular guest. And he has his own podcast, by the way, the Playground Podcast. 00:02:29 Melissa: So, Chris reveals today the hidden power of play, from how different toys develop everything from relationship skills to problem-solving abilities. We also explore why true play isn't about reaching an end goal, it's about embracing the pure joy of the journey. So, whether you're looking to understand the art of playing alongside your kids or giving them some space to explore independently, this episode is going to change how you think about playtime. So I encourage you to join us for this rich conversation about rediscovering the magic that happens when we give ourselves permission to just play. 00:03:10 Melissa: Okay, so before we jump into the conversation, I wanna just let you know that after the conversation, I would invite you to explore the art of play with my book, Fertile Imagination. Why is that relevant to you as a mom? Here's what I want you to know. It's really hard to guide our kids toward imagination if we've secretly lost touch with our own. So in my book, Fertile Imagination, I share with you the exact framework that I used in order to reawaken my imagination, play with my imagination, stretch my imagination, and strengthen what I believe to be our greatest superpower. 00:03:56 Melissa: So this framework is super simple to follow. It is guided and it is also provided in lots of really cool journaling question prompts in the book. And it's gonna be the same exact process that I used in order to really get back in touch with that little childlike spirit that all of us has, but maybe we forgot we have held quite tightly close to our hearts. 00:04:22 Melissa: So, I invite you to go ahead, rediscover your creativity, and see if you can find your childlike zest for life. Because I really believe that it's hard to teach our kids things that we may have forgotten are natural to us, and maybe came naturally to us when we were younger. So enjoy the conversation. The link to the book is available in the show notes where you're listening to this. Let me read the actual link so that you can learn more about my book, Fertile Imagination. 00:04:53 Melissa: It is a bit.ly link. So it is bit.ly/fertilebook. You can absolutely grab a copy right there of Fertile Imagination. If you wanted the audio version that is available exclusively via Amazon. So go ahead and check out the show notes for that link. Thank you again. And I hope you enjoy the conversation and let me know what you think at the end, I will share with you my top three takeaways that you can apply to your immediate mom life. Thank you so much. 00:05:28 Melissa: Chris Byrne. I am so excited to have you here on the Mom Founder Imagination Hub. How are you? 00:05:35 Chris: I am very well. I'm so excited to be with you. Thank you so much for the invitation. 00:05:40 Melissa: I couldn't get enough of your TED Talk. I was like, oh my gosh, he's not just a toy historian. He's like a toy psychologist. I loved it. I loved it. So welcome to the show. Chris, I want to just start with the big, big question on my mind. Help me understand from your perspective, decades in the industry, learning about the art of play, like what is an imagination to you and do you consider it a superpower? 00:06:12 Chris: Well, I absolutely consider our imagination our superpower. It is the one thing that, really one of the many things that really define us as human beings. Nothing happens in our world that doesn't start in the imagination. It can be, what do I want for lunch? Or what do I want to be when I grow up? Or should I marry this person? Or should I have children? 00:06:34 Chris: Or whatever it is because we begin in the imagination and other kinds of animals, you just put food in front of them and they eat, it's instinctual. But for us, it's not- as humans, it's not just instinctual. We literally create our worlds on a daily basis and that starts in the imagination. 00:06:54 Melissa: I agree. And it's interesting because as a fully grown adult, I would say that when I was writing my book, Fertile Imagination, and I see it as like a superpower for moms who are technically adults. I feel like it's a topic that is seldom discussed amongst adults. Like, is this something that you are noticing? Or maybe, you know, people that have that childlike quality because of your industry? What's your take on imagination, the art of play, and being an adult? 00:07:30 Chris: Well, I think all of those are really critical to who we are, because play is really the act of asking a question, what if? What if I do this? What if I, you know, as an adult in can be, what if do whatever? For me, as a kid is like, what if I jump off this wall? What's gonna happen? You know, but we grow up and we have a little bit more, more adult kind of perceptions, if you will, for that. And it really is like trying to spin out a scenario. 00:08:06 Chris: So if I am going to take a new job, for example, what is that gonna be like? Who am I gonna be working with? And we begin to develop stories around things in our imagination. And those stories are very important because we really can't take action to make things real until we've imagined them as a concept. 00:08:28 Melissa: Yeah. And so, okay. So this is something that I'm struggling with right now. This is like real time, I need some help, get me unclogged sort of stuff. So this idea of having a story in my mind and having a vision I want to make real, the vision side of it is so hard right now for me to see, mainly because it's like, there's things that I've envisioned in the past, but I haven't made happen. So I don't know kind of like how to play myself to a solution or a vision or just kind of like, think with a little less of like the past, you know, like hindering this vision. 00:09:15 Chris: Right. It's a great, it's a great thing. I mean, I'm sorry you're going through that, but I think that if you look at how a child plays, right, when they get an idea and they don't sit there and think, well, if I just do this or I do this or I do that, it's going to be fun, right? They come, that's not fun. I'm done. I'm on to the next thing. And I think as adults, we should do that too. If something is becoming too much effort, if it's not working, then we just drop it and go on to the next thing. 00:09:47 Chris: And I don't think there's any harm or foul in that. And I think that when you look at a kid who is imagining and playing, they're not judging the play as they're doing it. They're looking at well, where did this take me and where should I go next from it? And it's a much freer, kind of more peaceful way to go through the world. 00:10:08 Chris: I mean, I talk about things that I've done that turned out to be mistakes. And I call them I said, well, that was a once in a lifetime experience. As in I don't have to do that again. I learned the lesson. 00:10:20 Melissa: Yeah. And I think, you know, approaching any problem from that perspective releases that pressure to get it right the first time. And it gives you like the levity to get back up and just be like, okay, let's go at it again. And I imagine like, cause I noticed also, and I know that this side of it might be a little bit more conventional thinking, but like, you actually bring these ideas into corporate settings, you know, the art of play. 00:10:51 Melissa: And I'm like, if I think about the different environments where it's not okay to play. It's not okay to make mistakes. Like how do you sell that idea of we're just playing right now and don't get frustrated if it works or not in like a corporate setting, you know? 00:11:11 Chris: Well, one of the things that's so interesting in a corporate setting is people come into a meeting or a brainstorming and they're focused on one specific outcome, right? So if you're focused on an outcome, you kind of end-run the process of play because play is a process. Play is asking, what if, you know, let's go down this road and let's go down this road and see what it is. So I always encourage people to be as off the wall as possible. I will give you an example that almost got me fired. 00:11:43 Melissa: This is a good one, okay. 00:11:44 Chris: And nobody will like it, but I was working with Ideal, with Ideal Toy Company and we had the Shirley Temple doll. And nobody, we had these porcelain $400 Shirley Temple dolls and Shirley Temple dolls were huge in the '30s and still with doll collectors, but nobody was buying them. And we thought, how do we get rid of them? And I said, well, why don't we put them on the QE2 and use them as skeet? Like people can launch the doll. 00:12:11 Chris: So the brand manager got really mad at me. And told me I was inappropriate. But as we talked more, we ended up doing a doll collecting event with Cunard that actually turned out to be good. So the idea is, go out there and play off the wall in a safe environment, obviously. So the idea of creating an environment where it's safe to play, where it's safe to have that sort of impulsive childish response to a situation is okay. 00:12:45 Chris: We would never have promoted that in a corporate sense. But the idea that we were just playing with ideas and being silly. That opens the pathway to being really creative and to seeing what could actually work. And then once you get that, you put the action steps in place to get to the next step. 00:13:05 Melissa: Yeah, I think just, you know, going crazy and just really trying to break out of conventional thinking and our very logical pathways in our mind, it's like first we do this, that, the other. It's almost like some sentences, right? And the way we like greet each other, it's so like rehearsed that to come up with something like, oh my gosh, I love your outfit. You know, it reminds me of like a toy soldier or something. It would be like way off, but it would start rapport, I think. Rapport or like, you know, people would be like, kind of weirded out. But I've always tried that. How can I not weird people out? 00:13:44 Chris: Well, it's, right, well, that's always a question, but I don't really worry about that too much. But I think that one of the things, again, as I was saying about process, but also getting over fear, right? As adults, we think, well, what if I get it wrong? Children, when they play, if you watch them play, they don't worry about getting it wrong. They just think, well, that didn't work. That didn't do what I wanted it to do. Let me do something else. They haven't built a hierarchy of judgment and really being unkind to themselves about doing something wrong. 00:14:19 Chris: And if you embrace play, there's really no kind of, you can't be wrong when you're playing, right? Some things may be practical, but there's imagination and there's spinning things out, things that might never become real, but then things that actually could practically become real. And the process of getting to that point is actually pretty joyful. 00:14:42 Melissa: And I think we could all use some more joy these days, that's for sure. Adults and children alike. So let's see, let's go back in time. So let's go back to the time where you recall maybe playing with a toy and feeling like an insane amount of joy. If you can think about, you know, your one moment or one of the moments, I'm curious to hear your perspective. 00:15:06 Chris: Well, it's really interesting because one of the things that I really believe is what we play with as kids really becomes, we become a lot of that. And we had a basement in our house that had a room in it. They had a window in it. And my brothers and I would create puppet shows. And we would do that. And we would just go round up all the kids in the neighborhood and say, you have to watch this puppet show. And they did. They were good. But it was really about storytelling. It was about connection. It was about making things up and just feeling very alive in that moment, feeling very connected to who I was at that time and being able to share that with other people. 00:15:52 Melissa: Wow, so that's interesting. So it's funny because I feel like maybe I was, because I was an only child for most of my upbringing, like a lot of the things I did were just on my own and I had to really figure out how to make something out of what was around me. So let me share like this one thing that I would do to just pass the time. And of course, like in the background, like there was like maybe Magnum P.I. playing or, you know, name- Hawaii Five-0, whatever my mom was into. 00:16:25 Melissa: So I would go to the closet and I would take out a shoebox. And I would proceed to create like a scene. So they're called dioramas. I looked it up because I was like, this is a weird thing that I just kept doing all the time. And then I would create little figurines and put like little slots, you know, on the sides and move the little carboards in and out, you know. And I was like, okay, I have to ask Chris, like, what does that say about me? I have no idea. 00:16:56 Chris: Well, I mean, I would say it sort of starts you as a storyteller, which is what you're doing today. You're telling stories and you're facilitating other people telling stories. But it's also, I mean, especially for children at that age, it's about trying to make sense of the world and the stories they tell us, like trying to make sense of relationships. I'll tell you another story. 00:17:18 Chris: Years ago, we were playing with some kids with Barbie dolls. And they had all these different Barbie dolls. And one kid took all the blonde Barbie dolls and they were making fun of the brunette Barbie doll. And we were just watching this and going, yeah, this is somebody who is working out a reality in their life. 00:17:38 Chris: And that is really what play is, because even as she, in this case it was a girl, became powerful in that situation, was able to stand up for herself, you're giving your brain the sense that you can actually do this. If you do it vicariously, you've already had that experience on some level. So that when you confront that in real life, it might be easier, or you might have a solution. 00:18:03 Chris: I mean, how many times do you go into a situation, an interview or whatever, and you've rehearsed what you're gonna say? And your brain already knows that. It's like visual, what they talk about in sports about visualizing, you know, the outcome. You know, you're already having that experience, which is so cool. Cause our brain doesn't know the difference sometimes between reality and what we imagine. 00:18:24 Melissa: I love that. I love that. And so, yeah, who knows what I was trying to work out? There are a lot of things going on in my home. I'll tell you that much. But yeah, I think, you know, that idea though, just like trying to work things out that, you know, maybe you don't have that first person experience with, but like doing it through the use of a toy. Have you noticed at a curiosity any sort of changes with the dynamics between toys and kids now that there's like AI sort of toys out there? 00:19:01 Chris: There are so many different types of play experiences. What we were just talking about is more traditional doll or action figure or stuffed animal kind of play where a child is really doing that. Some of the other stuff with AI or licensed space like Star Wars, Marvel, all of that is beginning to understand yourself as a capable human being. 00:19:23 Chris: So for example, if I'm a superhero, I can feel. I can have the feeling of what it's like to be a superhero. And I always say, if your life is all about mom is in control, eat your peas, get in the minivan, do your homework, suddenly if you're a superhero, that's very empowering. And then empowering as an individual to be able to confront the world in a different way because you're empowered. So it's very classical, the kind of totemistic idea that we take on the powers of the superheroes. 00:19:59 Chris: And even though we're not gonna fly, we're not gonna lift, we're not gonna pick up a truck, we're not gonna do that, you have the emotional sense of capability, which is really what it's all about. 00:20:10 Melissa: That's interesting. I think, I mean, I don't know. Now that I think about my kids, for example, their toy experiences these days is really YouTube videos and playing video games and things like that. And I wonder if that's also along the same thread of what you just said, feeling the different capabilities like running fast or jumping high, things like that. 00:20:37 Chris: I think definitely. I mean, it's, you know, YouTube videos are like today's cartoons, right, on some level. You know, I grew up watching cartoons and, and it was- so they're looking at who are my role models and who are, you know, somebody's doing something. Oh, I'd like to try that. And, you know, or oh, wow, they tried that, I'm not gonna do that, but what would it be like if I did this kind of thing? 00:21:03 Chris: So I think that it's a window on the world and people are always concerned about screen time and I'm never concerned about screen time so much as I'm concerned about what's on the screen. So that is what's being modeled through the YouTube things, things that you as a mom or a parent want your child to be consuming because it can be very supportive or it can be kind of dangerous depending on what kids have access to. 00:21:30 Melissa: Yeah. And it's so interesting what you're sharing right now, because I mean, I had Saturday morning cartoons, for example, and I ate a lot of cereals with all the dyes and all these other things. And my kids literally tell me, they're like, oh, we want to have Saturday morning cartoons just like you. But of course, it is that YouTube thing. And I limit it to SpongeBob. Like, that's appropriate for their ages right now. 00:21:54 Melissa: But I think that's so interesting, this whole idea of rehearsal and visualization and imagination. I wonder because when it comes to toys and just the way that they've changed through the years, how did, for example, Tickle Me Elmo, how did that support people in terms of capabilities or anything? I'm curious. 00:22:22 Chris: Well, Tickle Me Elmo was kind of an outlier in that, you know, in terms of classical play. Tickle Me Elmo became a fad, right? And fads take on a life of their own. They kind of jump the shark or jump from the toy industry because Tickle Me Elmo started as an entertaining little preschool doll for preschoolers, infants and preschoolers. Suddenly it becomes this whole cultural phenomenon that everybody has to have. 00:22:50 Chris: It becomes, so it's a fad, so it becomes kind of a marker in time. So if you were around for Tickle Me Elmo, and you remember that, it's sort of a springboard to your memories of what the latter part of 1996 was about, because that's when Tickle Me Elmo was really huge. So that's not really kind of play in the way that I talk about it a lot. That becomes a cultural event. And my other joke about Tickle Me Elmo, Tickle Me Elmo was $40 really, basically, or more. You know, you can have a Tickle Me Elmo and be really cool for a lot less than you can have a Birkin bag. 00:23:26 Melissa: Wow, yeah, that's true. That is true. It's so funny, this conversation just takes me down the whole nostalgic route. Like I'm thinking about my Steve Urkel joke pull doll. Do you remember that one? 00:23:39 Chris: Yeah, yeah, of course. 00:23:41 Melissa: Yeah, so anyways, I'm totally like aging myself right now. I'm like, oh, I had Steve Urkel and I had Popples and all the like. What do you think, you know, nostalgia? Let's talk about that. Because I feel like a lot of marketers use that, you know, in order to kind of like pull forth a certain generation, let's say. And I even feel like at a supermarket, like I'm like, I think they know who their shoppers are with the music. But let's talk about nostalgia. 00:24:09 Melissa: Like, and again, thinking about more quote unquote modern toys, you know, like. And back to like these like electronics, like do you think that it'll be the same sort of calling card, I think is the right phrase? Like when someone starts saying, oh, like, let's say 10 years from now, you know, what's the name of the- Stumble Guys? Like, do you think that people will say like a certain like thing on video games and it'll have the same emotional pull as like Tickle Me Elmo, Popples, or Cabbage Patch? 00:24:41 Chris: It's hard to know. The thing about nostalgia is it's really for adults, right? Nostalgia is for people looking back. When you're three and four, you're not nostalgic for much. You're not remembering much. Maybe you remember your pull ups, right? When you had your pull ups. But you don't, you're not really nostalgic for something because you haven't been around that much. 00:25:03 Chris: The challenge from a toy marketing standpoint is relying on nostalgia to sell toys. Because I mean, yes, there's a certain level of you as a mom had My Little Pony or Littlest Pet Shop or any of those huge hits, Masters of the Universe. And you want to share those with your child. But for it to engage your child's imagination, there has to be something authentic to them. It's not just, mom liked this, so I'm going to like it too. That doesn't really work. 00:25:31 Chris: Look at Barbie and how Barbie's been redefined over the years, because Barbie always reflects the culture at any given time. So in 1959, she could be a fashion model or a bride, right? Pretty much, those are the Barbie options. Today, there are hundreds of careers and there's hundreds of abilities. And Barbie, the Barbie line looks like the world kids are growing up in, just as it did in 1959. It's just a more diverse and broader world with more possibility for girls and women today than it was in 1959. 00:26:08 Melissa: So when it comes to the toy industry, who's actually using their imagination to come up with like what to make for the future? Like, is it a combination of kids and adults? Is it like who's actually imagining like right now, like in the Mattels, et cetera, you know, what's coming down the line like 10 years from now? It's going to be hot and cool. And like, how do you how do you imagine something like that? 00:26:36 Chris: Well, it's hard. I mean, I think I think it's like, you know, my crystal ball usually needs a shot of Windex so I could get a clearer sense. But it's more an art than a science, that's for sure. And it's looking at trends. It's looking at how are kids playing, how are they interacting, how are they socializing, what is fun to them, and what's going on in the culture at large. Because the toy industry always reflects the culture. 00:27:03 Chris: We're always reflecting, because kids, you know, most healthy kids, they aspire to being big. They wanna grow up and they want the things like their parents have. So back in the, you know, in the early 2000s when cell phones came out, you saw tons of preschool cell phones, right? You don't see that so much anymore because the preschoolers have a real cellphone. 00:27:25 Chris: But you see things that will allow them to feel like they are part of the culture and they are growing up into it and that they are older and perhaps more capable than they really are because that's an important imaginative tool to help in the maturation process. 00:27:41 Melissa: That's fascinating. So that's true. It was definitely a lot of like, I don't know, mommy and me things. Like you see them with like a cash register or like a Target cart, right? The plastic little one, right? Cause their parent is shopping at Target. And so I wonder because it's like, there's some habits that as a parent, like maybe we wanna shake off ourselves, but we're inadvertently doing a lot. 00:28:06 Melissa: So like the cellphone one, I'm like, oh God, yeah, mommy has a cellphone and now her child does too. And it's like, how can I stop? And it's a reinforcement, but I'm wondering, okay, so in terms of the future and in terms of toys, have you ever done or seen any sort of things where the mom was playing with the child versus the child was playing by themselves? Like any differences there? 00:28:31 Melissa: Because I would love to just kind of inspire a listener right now to consider the fact that actually getting lost in play with their child can be even more beneficial than just having your child play with a toy to the side and you're doing something completely different. 00:28:52 Chris: I think that is critically important. One of the things that we're talking to parents of Gen Z and Gen Alpha kids. And Gen Alpha was born 2010 to this year. And one of the things that parents talk about is some of the best part of their day is when they're playing with kids. And what I always suggest is that if you're playing with your kid, especially if they're a preschooler, let the child run the play and you respond. Don't tell them, oh, look at this, oh, do that. 00:29:24 Chris: And you don't have to teach, it doesn't have to teach them anything, right? It doesn't have to teach. Kids are going to learn. So really letting that child's imagination drive the experience because, you know, I think every parent has had the experience where your child comes up with something and you go where did that come from? 00:29:45 Melissa: 100%. All the time. 00:29:47 Chris: And it's because they're sponges and they're listening to their absorbing everything and then they're processing it to their childlike brains or their childish brains. So I think that letting the child do that, but being there and being in communication is really important. 00:30:02 Chris: When I was growing up and maybe when you were too, we had three different worlds. We had kid world where no adults came in and the kids were doing that. We had adult world where we weren't allowed, where the parents would do that. And then there was family world, which is dinner and vacations and being yelled at about your grades or whatever that was. 00:30:21 Chris: But those three worlds don't really seem to exist anymore. And parents and kids are much more integrated in one another's lives. I think that's an outcome of COVID. It's actually a very positive outcome from COVID. Because you as mom and dad, have fun with your kids. Come on. It's, again, back to the idea of process rather than outcome. They don't have to become an expert ball player. They don't have to become an expert thing at times. They can actually just learn and play and discover the world and share those discoveries with you. 00:30:51 Melissa: Yeah, I love that. And I think it's an opportunity for someone that has to think a lot in life and feels the stresses of life to kind of let go and just stop thinking and just going with what is. Be present. You know, be totally present. 00:31:12 Chris: Be totally present and just be open to what it is. It's trying not to, as I was saying, it doesn't have to have a definitive outcome. And the one thing I think we've lost track of, often in our culture right now, is the idea of embracing process. It's really okay to make mistakes. It's really okay to try something, as long as you get up and start again. 00:31:36 Chris: I mean, how many times have you, I was talking about, for me, I learned to ski late. And I'm a really mediocre skier. I'm enthusiastic, but I'm not good. And I had somebody who was teaching me and he said, Chris, eventually I was scared. Eventually you're gonna have to point your skis down the hill. So I did it, I fell a lot, I did that, but I was so eager to learn that I'd fall and get up again. 00:32:04 Chris: I had to learn how to get up, but that's the thing that I think is, you know, if you have an idea of where you'd like to go but embrace the process on the way there because who knows what you're going to learn and what you're going to discover. 00:32:16 Melissa: Yeah, I definitely agree with that. I think that's the key to any goal. It's just you have to really fall in love with the process as you head towards the vision the goal, you know, whatever it is that you're trying to accomplish. And I also love the fact that, you know, as with play it's like there's something that's so pure about it, you know, when left on unmanipulated. 00:32:40 Melissa: It's like as a parent, we might have this desire to like educate our kids up to wazoo with regards to like every educational toy out there and every moment with we're with them, we're teaching them another language or coding or something. But I think, you know, just being open to a little bit, you know, unstructured play and that time with your child has so many benefits. And I think, you know, Chris, the work that you're doing just stay connected to like play as just being fun and okay and positive is is really helpful. Thank you so much for the work that you've done. 00:33:18 Chris: Thanks. I mean, I really do think that it as I mentioned, joy before it really does open the door to being joyful and going, oh, wow, that's fun, you know? I mean, when was the last time you said, oh, wow, that's really fun. 00:33:31 Melissa: 100%. Yeah, for sure. Thank you so much, Chris. So where can listeners continue to learn about their favorite toys, about you, about what's up ahead in the toy industry? 00:33:42 Chris: You can come see the toyguy.com. That's probably the best way. And then on Instagram, I'm thetoyguy. So, yeah. And I post a lot of pictures from things like toy fairs and different things and things that are fun for me and that make me giggle. 00:33:58 Melissa: Thank you so much, Chris. Have an awesome one. 00:34:01 Chris: Thank you. 00:34:03 Melissa: My three takeaways for this conversation that you can absolutely take to the bank and apply in your home are, first, this idea that playing with our kids has benefits for our kids, but also for us, especially if you're a super busy mom. It helps put you in the immediate present moment. So that's a big, big perk right there. 00:34:25 Melissa: Second is this idea that it's all about the process as opposed to the final answer. And that's something that I know is hard to think about when you're constantly thinking about what's next in your life. So thinking about play as something that you're doing and it's a process instead of to put together that Lego piece might be a great shift in your thinking and could relieve you of the stress and pressure of getting things right. 00:34:54 Melissa: Second, no, actually my third point here, my third point would be that in terms of the benefits of playing, I hadn't realized how psychologically deep some of these toys touch the minds of our kids. So the simple fact that we are thinking about, you know, working out relationships when you're doing a diorama, which may have been the case for me personally or maybe you're thinking about whether or not you have skills like a superhero, which was something that Chris shared, I just never thought about how psychologically interesting playing with a toy could be. 00:35:32 Melissa: So you might want to reconsider this idea that playing with a toy is just a way to distract your child or keep them focused on something other than breaking things. There could be real psychological value and also something for you to just consider psychological opportunity when it comes to the choices behind the toys we put in front of our kids. 00:36:00 Melissa: So I hope you enjoyed this conversation. Again, this episode was brought to you by my book, Fertile Imagination. I am excited about it. It's a guide for stretching every mom's superpower for maximum impact. Your imagination is your superpower. That is why I had Chris on the show today. I encourage you to check out the show notes where you could actually purchase the book and let me know that you did. I am always available for conversation and any questions. Thank you so much and I appreciate you. And until next Tuesday.
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269: Are YOUR Limiting Beliefs Secretly Capping Your Kids' Future Success?
My conversation with a non-profit CEO, a long-time mentor, recently turned to our dreams for our children. It began when she shared how her mother had praised her beautiful New Jersey home, which led her to reflect: "I'd want my kids to live in castles! I want them to have even more than I do." Like any parent, I want my three sons to surpass me in every aspect of life—and even create new categories beyond AI to conquer! However, I've realized my own limiting beliefs and stress responses could unknowingly cap their success if I don't consciously address them. For example, my fear of openly competing or declaring my ambition for first place—how can my sons confidently compete on a world stage if I haven't confronted this fear? Similarly, if we avoid networking because we fear rejection, can we effectively teach our children to build connections? This is where our greatest opportunity for inter-generational impact lies: facing our own limitations so they don't become our children's inheritance. My mother's primary concern was the potential inheritance of her manic depression. This fear led her to anxiously await my thirtieth birthday, believing symptoms would likely manifest before then if I were to inherit it. This sparked my curiosity about breaking the cycle of inherited limiting beliefs for my own sons. For thirteen years, as a mother, I've considered how to proactively guide my children toward success. I believe we can break negative cycles and cultivate a new model of success by nurturing their strengths, fostering healthy mindsets, and focusing on key skills like imagination, cross-cultural thinking, and resilience. This is about empowering our children from the start. Generational patterns often include inherited personality traits, impacting education and career choices. Families frequently pass down expectations and lessons, often along gender lines. These inherited mindsets shape our understanding of what it means to be a girl or boy within our family. Children observe and adopt behaviors they perceive as normalized expectations. They may also be explicitly taught specific ways of thinking, especially in early childhood. Limiting beliefs can also be passed down. In my family, I observed a lack of desire or ability to ascend into leadership positions or gain mastery in a field. My mother, a secretary for corporate leaders, held a strong limiting belief that she lacked the intelligence to provide valuable recommendations. This idea was ingrained in me, driving my need for external validation in corporate settings. While this mindset sometimes helped me in corporate life, it didn't translate well into entrepreneurship. My mother's limiting belief was essentially a form of impostor syndrome. Her lack of confidence stemmed from various factors. As a child, I mistakenly attributed it to her not having a four-year degree. She often mentioned her inability to finish her degree as a working mom. Yet, her illness and its constant disruptions likely caused her to question her ability to contribute meaningfully to leadership conversations. As a child, I simply saw her as a secretary supporting leaders. Our family felt inconsequential. This perception shifted when I met children from families who held positions of influence. I realized I needed to address this inherited limiting belief. Though young, caring for my mother fostered a sense of maturity, allowing me to envision a different future. I didn't want to simply play a supporting role. So, where did I start? 1980s sitcoms like Who's the Boss? sparked my career aspirations. I wanted that life: Connecticut, business owner, advertising. Without a mentor, TV was my guide. Summers stamping travel brochures ignited my wanderlust. London, Singapore – the world felt attainable. My mom didn't travel, but I craved that broader experience. I knew life beyond my zip code held possibilities. I worked with what I had: imagination. I had a career blueprint from fiction, then exposure to someone who explored globally my stepmother owned a travel agency. I realized following their path wouldn't be easy, but I had something they didn't teach on TV – resilience, inherited from my mom. I knew I could stumble, fall, and get back up. Ultimately, I achieved that dream: Connecticut, Ogilvy & Mather, even Australia for 3.5 years. My podcast, The Mom Founder Imagination Hub, features conversations with world leaders. These realities weren't in my original blueprint, but resilience was my active ingredient. What's yours? If you want more for your kids, discover it. Imagination, cross-cultural thinking, resilience – these are the tools to re-architect success for our kids. This is my parenting blueprint now. My sons will tweak it, of course; change demands it. Let's focus on your kids, your blueprint, and overcoming challenges and limiting beliefs so they can achieve more than you did. How can you transform thoughts like, "I don't feel comfortable asking for money," "Getting on stage gives me anxiety," or "I hate competing" into lessons that build resilience? If you want your child to own a business but you've never had one, you'll need to address these areas of discomfort. Since these limiting beliefs are inherent in entrepreneurship, how can you use them to your advantage? One way is to challenge yourself to ask for discounts in front of your kids, or challenge them to do it. I dared my kids to do this, letting them keep their savings. This tackles the "asking for money" hurdle. Public speaking anxiety? Bring your kids into the process. Share your fears and how you manage them. Have them brainstorm solutions. The goal is to expose them to the same challenges they'll face and show them how you move forward. Age-appropriate conversations are key. For the discount example, include prep sessions where you brainstorm possible questions with your kids. They can choose from your list or create their own. ("Can I get a discount for paying cash?" "Is there a student discount?" "Is there a sale coming up?") For public speaking, articulate your worries simply: "Mommy feels yucky in her tummy because she's nervous about talking." This leverages mindfulness – acknowledging the physical sensations of anxiety – to start a conversation. Here's A Blueprint Reframing Exercise 1. What is a dream you have for your child? (e.g., Living in a castle, owning their own business) 2. What qualities must they have to fulfill that dream? 3. Write out your analysis of whether your blueprint offers those qualities. Pick out the ones that are in direct contrast to what your child will need. Example 1. You never want your kid to work for a boss in a big corporate company. 2. You know that working for a startup or building one requires the ability to build relationships. 3. You love talking about real-life with your mom friends. You adore helping people. You are a connector. However, you do not like asking for help or asking for intros or turning friendships into professional relationships. 4. Here's an opportunity to work on your limiting belief so that it doesn't get in your kid's way later on: turn a Saturday soccer practice conversation into a business one in front of your kids ideally. I'm not asking you to do anything I have not already done. During my sons' soccer match I turned a personal friendship into a professional partnership because I took interest in the careers of the moms around me. The same applies for our kids. Yes, in school they might have project-based work but what about in other realms of life from church to sports to music. Give the kids a chance to build personal relationships that can translate into a professional objective outside of their scenarios. The thinking behind this intentional thinking on your limiting belief not being your kid's limiting beliefs is worthwhile because our minds are flexible. According to Carol Dweck you can change your thinking and as a mother doing this in front of your kids gives your kids a real shot at having what you didn't have due in part to that limiting belief. Take for example one of my clients who is the co-founder of a non-profit that has brought in millions in donations. She recently decided to sing in front of an audience after years of feeling frivolous for doing such things. Her son might be under ten but now his mom has not only expressed herself after years of hiding this personal love of hers but also provided an example to her son of what a woman putting herself out there looks like. Imagine this mom talking to her son ten years from now when he wants to do something silly like be in a band or launch a YouTube channel featuring his own videogames. This conversation will sound very different because his mom now went through every emotion under the sun to get on stage and figured out how to navigate them in a similar way. Can you see how this guidance will sound totally differently once informed by your own evidence vs. a wish for your kids that you didn't have the chutzpah to go first? The same goes for a mom who would love her kids to live abroad but never got over her fear of living in a land where she doesn't know anyone or perhaps the language. Sure our kids might be daring whereas we never were but the potential is greater if you went first. You'd be the perfect coach and in instances where you wouldn't be the right coach then you can always ask the world for help – that's again where ideas can come from anywhere even outside of your home country. There are many ways to build a growth mindset in your kids. It starts with shifting praise from innate talent to effort, practice, and skill development. Instead of "Wow, you're a great reader," try "Wow, you're working really hard to get through those books." This shows kids they control their effort, which drives mastery. Here are some tangible examples of nurturing imagination, seeking diverse ideas, and building resilience: · Imagination: Ask open-ended questions. After reading a book, ask your kids to imagine alternate endings. For example: "How might this book end differently?" · Cross-cultural thinking: Explore YouTube. Instead of limiting content to your own culture, find channels featuring diverse ways of life and experiences. · Resilience: Practice exploring weaknesses. While everyone enjoys winning, growth comes from discomfort. If your child isn't into sports, encourage them to try a competition. The goal isn't victory, but finishing the competition. The lesson: "You might dislike this sport, but you can still participate; your capacity is still valid." A growth mindset, fueled by imagination, cross-cultural thinking, and resilience, helps children break free from inherited limitations and design their own blueprints. We must be honest about our own limitations, work on them, and model a different path for our kids. Then, give them opportunities to practice these new, empowering beliefs. One blueprint does not fit all Each child is unique. You could have three kids with three distinct dreams requiring different skills and beliefs. While it would be ideal to eliminate all your limiting beliefs, who has time for that? Instead, let your kids lead the way. Create environments for them to explore their ambitions at every age. Here I am taking a page from another culture... In South Korea, there's a tradition called Doljanchi where a one year old child chooses from a selection of objects, supposedly indicating their future career. You can adapt this idea, but ultimately, be intensely curious about what your kids gravitate toward. If your child loves a Valentine's Day craft activity, you've discovered an interest. If they dislike it, note their preferences. This is valuable data. Want to introduce them to new cultures? Let them try Duolingo. Teaching resilience? Encourage them to ask their teacher to redo an assignment. Just asking takes bravery. These ideas are age-dependent. Building these proficiencies varies with capacity. If you'd like more ideas tailored to specific age groups, just ask! You don't want to pass along limiting beliefs, and I'm here to help." Your turn "What one small step can you take today to break a negative cycle and empower your child's unique path to success – focusing on imagination, cross-cultural thinking, and resilience – and incorporate it into your evolving Fertile Imagination Blueprint?" Ready to break the negative cycle and ignite your child's unique potential? Don't wait. Begin implementing these strategies today, and discover the power of fostering imagination, cross-cultural thinking, and resilience. My book, Fertile Imagination, offers a foundation, but personalized guidance can amplify your impact. Let's work together to craft a tailored education plan that empowers both you and your child. Schedule a session at www.melissallarena.com/sessions and let's build your family's blueprint for a vibrant, successful future. Only 5 Spots Left! Claim Your FREE Call + Educational Plan Before 2/14. Melissa Llarena is an author, imagination coach, consultant, speaker, and contributor to ForbesWomen articles that have garnered 4 million + views. She is also the host of the Mom Founder Imagination Hub, the podcast for entrepreneurs, founders, and creators who are also moms. Featured guests include GaryVee and Beth Comstock. Melissa holds a psychology degree from New York University, an MBA from the Tuck School of Business at Dartmouth, and a Transformational Coaching Academy certificate. She is also a certified meditation practitioner. Melissa lives in Austin, Texas, with her husband and three sons. Visit www.fertileideas.com.
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268: Co-existing with Work + Family Stress: A Four Noble Truths Approach
Let's find the good in experiencing stress so that you don't shortchange yourself out of its ability to instill inner confidence in your capabilities. We are focused on experiences such as birthing a baby, building a business, or navigating a everchanging workplace. Just because someone else fell apart in any of those situations, it does not mean that you will too. It's unique to you, yet worth uncovering, because when you get to the other side of a stressful situation, if you embody at least one learning or lesson, then you will have increased your capacity to handle more stressful situations. This comes in handy, as life often hands us stress at a pretty hot and heavy pace. In this article, we'll interweave the four noble truths along with personal stories that showcase the value of embracing stress rather than running away from it. There have been so many occasions when I was told not to put so much pressure on myself, and it was out of those circumstances, where I didn't let their thinking impact mine, that I can now tell my greatest stories of defiance and delivery. A memorable such moment was during my first semester of law school. My mom told me this: 'Watch out, Melissa, and try not to experience too much stress.' She was giving me a fair warning based on her own sensitivities to stress. My mom has manic depression. A person with manic depression can be sent into an episode or spell by stress. While that guidance came from her experiences, it also came along with her tender concern for my mental health. My mental health, on the other hand, has proven sturdy, in great part because I've had ample opportunities to practice the art of experiencing stress. Law school wasn't a moment of redemption, but it was the time I realized my limit. I'm glad I didn't listen to my mom, because then I wouldn't have discovered my kryptonite. We need to know our kryptonite and how to overcome it. Somehow, it was that combination of overwhelming debt and basing my self-worth on school grades that almost broke me. I got through that time mentally unscathed, thankfully, but intuitively, I knew it was close. There's a benefit to knowing how far you can go. That experience gave me the courage to finally pursue my dream career in advertising. Taking a pay cut didn't seem so bad when the alternative was six-figure debt and no income. The trick is to always stay beneath that line. My self-publishing experience with Fertile Imagination pushed me to that limit. I had gotten my edited copy of my manuscript extremely late, and to compensate for that delay, I sat in my chair for twelve hours straight. The pressure I put on myself to finish the book was enormous. Around the twelfth hour, I felt a crack in my neck, which turned into a year of pain, physical therapy, and an MRI. Ever gotten an MRI? I've been through a lot, but somehow my anxiety was insane during that MRI, and my relationship with God has never been closer. It was like a church service in that cylinder. Yet, this was another opportunity to practice coexisting with stress. I don't regret that experience, and I know I learned from it. The other side of that stressful moment was completing my book and focusing on my physical health, a goal I'd been writing about for decades. Yet, somehow, I had to crash physically to finally pursue it. In these two cases, I needed to experience these greater stresses to build the confidence and conviction necessary to believe I could endure the kind of stress it takes to go after what I've always wanted. What if the same is true for you? What if, rather than avoid stress, you walked right into it with a different perspective? What if you need that vote of confidence—knowing you can handle a ton of stress—to get the kind of laser focus necessary to finally jump into your greatest personal or professional adventure? What if you need to have something to say: 'Well, if I did that and didn't die, then I might as well go for this'? I want to share a new way to think about stress because it's the reality of being human. As a meditation practitioner, I thought I'd enlist the help of the four noble truths to help us see the profundity in otherwise stressful experiences. My meditation offerings are secular, yet I do think ancient wisdom has its place in stress management. It gives me comfort to know that my experiencing stress is not novel; it's normal and expected. So, let's turn to commonly held beliefs that we can anchor this conversation in—the four noble truths Understanding the Four Noble Truths The Four Noble Truths are fundamental to Buddhism and describe the nature of reality and the path to liberation. They are: 1. Dukkha: This is often translated as "suffering," but more accurately encompasses unsatisfactoriness, frustration, and the inherent impermanence of all things. 2. Samudaya: The origin or cause of dukkha, which is identified as craving, attachment, and aversion. 3. Nirodha: The cessation of dukkha, which is achieved through the elimination of craving and attachment. 4. Magga: The path leading to the cessation of dukkha, known as the Noble Eightfold Path, which encompasses right understanding, right thought, right speech, right action, right livelihood, right effort, right mindfulness, and right concentration. 1 The Inescapability of Stress in Modern Life You don't need to be a Buddhist to believe that being human means experiencing suffering. Just look around corporate America—you can see and feel it everywhere. According to Ohsa.gov, 83% of US workers suffer from work-related stress. You can be stressed about having, keeping, leaving, or getting a job. The sound of a ping can spike your cortisol levels. It doesn't take much to suffer these days. We experience a constant, low-grade level of stress or anxiety, and our baseline sensitivity to stress is very low. This comparison comes from the constant barrage of information we consume daily, which contributes to "sympathy stress," as well as the fact that many of us are openly struggling. This is why it's necessary to find a way to coexist with stress; it's inescapable. A Yoga Analogy for Managing Pain In my pre-natal yoga class with my firstborn, the teacher had us sit on our bent toes. Her rationale was to have us experience physical pain and, instead of running away, breathe through the stretch. Was this comparable to birthing any of my kids? Heck no! It was a way to introduce the idea of feeling pain and remaining still within that feeling. The teacher's approach was to increase our tolerance for the inevitable pain of childbirth. The pain of childbirth is inescapable. This toe stretch gave me a chance to imagine being with inescapable pain in a situation where I could escape. It's this intentional decision not to escape an escapable pain that builds confidence. You have the chance to escape discomfort, yet you wrangle your fears and push forward anyway. There's immense power in those moments. This is where your practice comes in, and how meditation can help you coexist in an empowered state amidst life's struggles. You can pause and breathe through life's emotional ups and downs instead of panicking and stopping the train. The Second Noble Truth: Understanding Craving, Attachment, and Aversion The second noble truth is Samudaya. It's the craving, attachment, or aversion to the feeling of stress. It's always a practice for me. As a business owner, it's easy to crave a consistent income or feel attached to maintaining a certain reputation. Aversions are real for us, too, such as my aversion to tech issues. Yet, my perpetual thoughts about these situations have gotten in my way. These situations are tough enough. By experiencing this second noble truth, I'm not doing myself any favors. This is why equanimity helps; it helps us focus on what's needed in the moment. I'll share an example in a bit. But first, let's turn this to you. The Fear of Obsolescence in the Age of AI Let's talk about craving for career permanence. Whether you are an entrepreneur or employee, this idea translates. The fear of becoming obsolete (FOBO) is rising among workers as AI advancements accelerate. A Gallup poll found that 22% of U.S. workers are concerned about their jobs becoming obsolete due to technology, and that figure is up from 2022. Imagine how freelance copywriters or coaches feel these days. Some feel like they are being promptly put out of business. The threat is real; however, thinking about the threat is stealing the time necessary to uplevel your skills or take actions to support your business. You are adding a layer of unnecessary suffering, draining your finite energy. AI is here, and so are you. How can you coexist with AI? This reminds me of those required college courses I didn't like. They were inescapable and boring. However, it was me who made them feel brutal when I procrastinated reading those ancient texts. Fast forward to today, and I can say that I had the same thoughts while completing some requirements for my meditation certification program. Finding Peace in Meditation (and a Bird's Nest) One week, I experienced a silent meditation in a house with three young boys and my husband. This was the kick-off to my meditation practitioner training. At the time, walking meditations were part of the daily experience, and I hated them. I'd pace in my yard, which was really boring. It reminded me of psych wards with outdoor spaces where I visited my mom. Sometimes she was in, and other times she was out. I felt a deep aversion to this mode of meditating. Yet, I had to do it a lot, so I opted to stare into the leaves of my trees instead of watching my pacing feet. You know what I realized? I saw a nest in the tree! This got me thinking about how I was a mama bird in a nest with my young. Noticing what was real—my breath and the nest—helped me. I smiled. Navigating the AI Revolution: A Path to Coexistence (The Third and Fourth Noble Truths) Stress is real, but suffering is optional. You can shift your thinking from whether you hate or love AI to saying to yourself, "AI is here. How can I co-exist with AI? Is there a right way for me to navigate AI? Might there be a right way to understand AI that can help me?" Once in the present, focused on the facts, you will experience the third noble truth, which is Nirodha. The path to this truth is called "magga," which is also the fourth noble truth and comprises several factors: right understanding, right thought, right speech, right action, right livelihood, right effort, right mindfulness, and right concentration. The eightfold path offers us an ideal way to coexist with stress. I haven't fully embodied it yet, but I feel as if each encounter with stress has given me a chance to practice it. Lessons from a Car Accident: Embracing the "Rights" Years ago, I experienced my first car accident. I was sitting in a parking lot in my new Honda minivan, waiting for my mom. A parked car, coming out of its spot, backed into my car. My minivan was perhaps months old, and this was my first accident. The other driver came out, shouting about how unnecessary the accident was. His wife quickly calmed him down, and then we exchanged information. I felt overwhelmed and wasn't thinking about Nirodha. I turned to my mom and said, "This shouldn't have happened! How can I get into an accident when I wasn't even moving?" She said, "Melissa, these things happen in life." Months later, I was in another accident in a parking lot, but I was moving this time. This second time felt different because I adopted my mom's wisdom. It was more manageable, and if we analyze it through the "rights," I'd say I had the right understanding. What if stressful situations are necessary to achieve all those "rights?" What if you're short-changing yourself by not increasing your stress management skills? I'd argue that this is true. I'm not suggesting you complicate your life, especially if it's already incredibly stressful. Instead, I'm urging you not to miss a life-giving moment where the gift is practicing the eightfold path. Once you see these as practices, you can teach your kids how to use stress for their benefit. A Son's BJJ Tournament: Wrestling with Life's Challenges This past weekend, one of my sons competed in a BJJ tournament. My eleven-year-old is not required to compete at that level. He could have competed at his local school. Yet, this isn't realistic to how we must compete in life for a job, medal, or resources. So, I encouraged him to compete, even though his first match was against someone who had previously won eleven times. Would you have done the same? Why would any mom allow that? Here's why: you will face outsized stresses in life, and these moments have allowed me to wrestle with the "rights." I got my greatest learnings and confidence from those hard bits of life. I don't win them all, but I've gained more "rights" along the way. Why would I cheat my son of that? So, he competed. I wanted him to take one lesson to the next match. For example, he was advised to stand up and not go straight for the legs in the second round. Did he do it? He tried, but it took the third round. That last round was unexpected. He was winded, tearful, red, and already out of his Gi. Was he going to do the fourth match? That third round, he gave it his all. There were hundreds of people looking at my kid. This is where my life experiences helped us both. Recognizing that my son had had enough, I could relate to so many moments as a kid when I had had enough, and yet life doesn't always give you a choice to walk away. I knew that because I experienced that. I pushed my son to return to the mat that fourth time because this was the right action, and I know that these moments are additive to the stories we tell ourselves about what we are capable of. It shapes how my kid will think about his ability to handle humiliation, boos, competing, and training. It gives him a sense for what it takes to compete with people who have won. His capacity to handle stress was increased in that moment. Imagine facing someone who has won 11 times during your first tournament, then having to enter round after round, loss after loss? This translates to failing in school, in business, and in relationships. My son was practicing the "right concentration" four times more on the mat than off on a typical Saturday. He was wrestling with the "right thoughts" even more than that. These encounters can be fruitful. They contribute to a rich life that can make you invaluable in the life of someone else. 💬 What's one workplace stressor you've learned to co-exist with? Drop it in the comments—I bet others can relate! ⬇️ My Story – Melissa Llarena I'm a meditation practitioner and #1 Amazon bestselling author who has spent years peering into the minds of marketers and executives, both as one of them and as their trusted guide. My articles in ForbesWomen have reached over 4 million readers, but what really lights me up is the deep work I do with people who, like me, have spent years shape-shifting to succeed. My own journey through the corporate world – 10 years at powerhouses like Ogilvy (working on IBM) and P&G (yes, even Charmin!) – taught me firsthand about wearing different hats across 14+ business functions. For the past 13 years, I've had the privilege of coaching over 200 marketing and advertising executives worldwide, having raw, honest conversations about what it really costs us to morph ourselves every single day. When I'm hosting the Mom Founder Imagination Hub podcast, I get to dive deep with remarkable leaders like Beth Comstock and GaryVee, exploring how to tap into our most overlooked superpower: imagination. My psychology degree from NYU, Dartmouth MBA, and Transformational Coaching certification gave me the foundation, but it was the pandemic that showed me – and my clients – that we needed something more. In 2021, when ambition felt impossible and imagination seemed out of reach, I realized we were all exhausted from trying to power through. That's when I took a leap – pausing my coaching practice to write a book filled with soul-searching questions, while earning my meditation certification from the Jack Kornfield organization. Now, I blend all these pieces – my corporate insider experience, thousands of honest conversations, and meditation wisdom – into workshops, sessions, and immersions that truly connect. Using imaginative meditation, mindfulness practices that even the most restless executives love, and revealing journaling exercises, I help people find their way back to themselves. Because here's what I know: when we stop losing ourselves every time life or business throws us a curveball, we can finally use our energy for what really matters – creating the impact we're meant to make.
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267: Why Stressed Professionals Quit Meditation (And How Not To)
Introducing Mountain to Molehill: A Mindfulness and Meditation Newsletter Mental Health Melissa Llarena Why Stressed Professionals Quit Meditation (And How Not To) Meditating is a good alternative to that third glass of wine at night – and might even serve as a replacement for psych meds for the most restless, stressed-out marketers, sales professionals, and ad executives dealing with the unpredictability of their virtual lives, workplace, home life, and everything else that gets logged in your head as stressful mountains to climb when in reality you're looking at a molehill you can simply hop over. Q: Why did I write this article encouraging you to return to meditation instead of relying on quicker fixes for stress? A: I know firsthand how psych meds play out. I've been an unwitting observer of a personal longitudinal study as the daughter of a mom who has been on them since 1982. My thinking is simple: if you can avoid them, do. I don't say this as a psychiatrist – I say it as a witness who has watched decades of science experiments performed on my single parent, from my toddler years through today, when the impact of this four-decade-long chemical warfare is irreversible. This deeply personal experience is why I'm committed to my mental health, and why I believe adopting and keeping a meditation practice is a powerful approach to life's realities. A consistent practice will increase your capacity to bear any weight you may be carrying – something we all need, don't you agree? Now, I know it's hard to adopt a practice from scratch, so I decided to focus on those of you who once meditated and might secretly wish to return. Let's start with the top reasons for this kind of "quiet" quitting. Notice the pun? I'll try to keep you chuckling throughout this read. But first, let's look at some serious stats... According to the Journal of Alternative and Complementary Medicine, approximately 60% of people who start a meditation practice discontinue within the first year. The primary reasons include: 1. Perceived lack of time 2. Difficulty maintaining consistent practice 3. Feeling they're "not doing it right" 4. Not seeing immediate results Let's explore doable workarounds for these four reasons, considering our modern omnichannel lives. Interestingly, this study aligns perfectly with a recent LinkedIn survey I conducted, asking mid-career professionals what they wanted me to cover. Time emerged as the top concern, so let's start there. Perceived Lack of Time Let's talk about time – or the common excuse of not having enough of it. Let's dispel the idea that you're too busy to drop in and pay attention to your breath for five minutes a day. Where can you steal these five minutes? Let's start with the low-hanging fruit. According to the Harvard Business Review, professionals spend an average of 28% of their workweek managing email. That's about 3.1 hours per day reading, writing, and responding to emails, with an estimated 25% of those being unnecessary or unproductive. Take my librarian email saga, for example. I received a ridiculously long email about a book renewal that could have been summarized in three sentences. Instead, this well-meaning librarian wrote paragraphs explaining a simple process. I thought to myself: she could have meditated in the time it took to write this novel of an email. Seriously, couldn't you shave five minutes from your 3.1 hours of daily email writing for a relaxing breathing session? I have full confidence you can steal some time from email writing to meditate. It can be that simple – or perhaps meditation can become your pre-meeting ritual? My pandemic meditation journey was ritualistic. I needed a tool to reliably catch my breath and return to my three sons as the calmest version of myself; the stakes were staring me in the face. I'd drag my son's bean bag out to my wrap-around balcony – my "lanai" in honor of the Golden Girls – and sit under the sun. The benefits were two-fold: it gave me something to do during lockdowns, and I returned refreshed enough to homeschool three sons. Ultimately, I returned to my teaching post with greater patience, not totally "unsnappable," but feeling more able to relax. Pro Tip: You can always find time when a boss drops a last-minute request. Somehow, you'll complete other assignments, shorten your timeframe, stay up later, or wake up earlier. Imagine treating meditation as vitally as that urgent work assignment. This is just your way into starting a practice – not necessarily how you'll have to make it stick – which brings me to the second reason for quitting. Difficulty Maintaining Consistent Practice Willpower is overrated. There, I said it. If I had unlimited willpower, I wouldn't have half a bottle of wine in my fridge or pair my glass with partially dry Manchego cheese at six p.m. when I nestle in my corner of the sofa before my sons fight me to the death to take over the TV. This is why I endeavor to do as much as possible before 9 am every single day – it's not because I want to challenge myself but because I don't trust myself as the day gets later. There's science to back this up, which is why I apply simple heuristics to maintain a consistent meditation practice. My decision-making process is brutally simple: · Question: Do I plan to eat today? · Answer: Yes. · Action: Then I guess I'll go to the gym, walk 10K steps, and meditate before starting my workday. Don't think you need to do these things before meditating or before 9 am like me. Instead, use my question to spark your own chain of daily habits. Yours can be as simple as: · Question: Do I plan to breathe today? · Answer: Yes. · Action: Then I'll take 5 minutes to pay attention to some of those breaths. This decision tree below is for those of us who've been trained to overthink... just follow the nodes. I've found that thinking is often what gets in our way. Arnold Schwarzenegger shared the same sentiment about his workouts in his Netflix documentary: he said he could think after his workouts. Same goes for meditating. Think later. See Substack. https://open.substack.com/pub/melissallarena/p/why-stressed-professionals-quit-meditation?r=fetqt&utm_campaign=post&utm_medium=web&showWelcomeOnShare=true My meditation practice looks different every day. Sometimes I'll light a candle, drop on my carpeted floor with earbuds, and hum along to a guru telling me: "I am not my body. I am not my mind." Let's call this my "scruffy, get it done" meditation. Other times I've meditated with my eyes open during a commute. I believe in habit stacking – pairing one existing habit with a new one. Not Seeing Immediate Results On Halloween 2023, I self-published my book "Fertile Imagination." My goal was to become an Amazon bestseller. While my three boys were putting on Halloween costumes, I was copy/pasting/pitching/praying. My ranking wasn't moving despite my efforts. I had two choices: toss my laptop out the window and curse Bezos, or maintain unwavering belief in the process. I kept going. When I woke up at 5 am, I was number one in two categories. Sure, I was just a good night's rest away from seeing my goal come true – but writing the book had taken two years, securing early readers required 35 outbound emails a day for months, and Amazon needed 24 hours to update their stats. A LOT went into it behind the scenes. This experience mirrors the practice of meditation. It requires consistent effort, even when you don't see immediate results. You must trust that the benefits will manifest over time, just as I trusted my book would eventually rise in the ranks. It's about cultivating a deep-seated belief in the power of the practice, even when your mind whispers doubts. Feeling They're "Not Doing It Right" The internet paints a picture of meditation that's a bit... idealized. You know the image: serene folks, Lululemon-clad, perched on fancy meditation pillows, humming along to some ethereal YouTube guru. That's not exactly my reality. This morning, I was planning to meditate, but my phone battery died. So, I grabbed my timer and dropped onto the carpet, aiming for those 25 minutes of blissful silence. But let's just say, my meditation practice looked a little different. If I'd meditated any longer, my husband might have gotten out the masking tape to document a crime scene. Let me explain. If you could have seen me, I was definitely not dressed for a yoga retreat – just my usual work attire: brown boots, ripped jeans, and a cashmere sweater. Picture it: a perfectly respectable professional, now sprawled on their living room floor, looking like a crime scene victim. Pause for a second to see how Canva's image-generating AI "Dream Lab" doesn't care about doing things "right." Let's learn from it. The first try is so wacky and wrong. See Substack for images. https://open.substack.com/pub/melissallarena/p/why-stressed-professionals-quit-meditation?r=fetqt&utm_campaign=post&utm_medium=web&showWelcomeOnShare=true The image below is closer to my original description, but it's still not "quite right" – like many AI-generated images. So give yourself some grace and aim for "good enough right now" rather than "perfect." See Substack for images. https://open.substack.com/pub/melissallarena/p/why-stressed-professionals-quit-meditation?r=fetqt&utm_campaign=post&utm_medium=web&showWelcomeOnShare=true Side note: if you had a second to take that pause, then you have time to meditate. ;) No side-eye from me – just pointing this out. Here's the truth: There's no right way to meditate. You can meditate in a closet, on a Trader Joe's line, or in a nursery room. Simply be present. Here's the easiest way to begin your meditation practice: Wear your work clothes. Perfect. Find a comfortable spot: A bed, sofa, or even a random rug. Even better. Set a timer for 10 minutes. Focus on your breath. Your thoughts will arise — that's normal. Gently guide your attention back to your breath. Give yourself a mental high-five when you return to breathing. Commit to finding your own meditation style. Meditation has two-fold benefits when it comes to managing stress. Harvard Health Publishing confirms that meditation activates your body's relaxation response, which helps you navigate stressful situations with a sense of calm. Additionally, a JAMA Internal Medicine meta-analysis found that mindfulness meditation significantly reduces perceived stress. So, whether you have to climb a mountain, you'll feel more capable of doing so. Or perhaps you can quickly shift your perception of a mountain and see it for what it really is: a surmountable molehill. You'll want to adapt or bring back your meditation practice if you wish to see more molehills than mountains and feel resourced if it's a real mountain you must climb up or down to get to the other side. So, are you ready to give it a try? Conclusion Meditation is a practice, not a magical solution to stop thinking altogether. Be patient with yourself, and remember that even a few minutes of mindful presence can make a difference. A brief pause can give you space to reconsider a knee-jerk reaction or simply feel more capable of a tough conversation. I hope this article has provided helpful insights and encouragement. If you're struggling to establish, maintain, or restart a consistent meditation practice, please reach out via email melissa .llarena [at] gmail.com or leave a comment on the platform of your liking Substack, Medium or LinkedIn. I can offer support as a mindfulness and meditation practitioner dedicated to finding solutions that can increase your ability to navigate life's challenges and opportunities. Remember, your mental and emotional well-being is as vital as your physical health. They are interconnected, as I've observed in my research and personal experience. A healthy mind in an unhealthy body will likely experience discomfort, and an unhealthy mind can manifest in physical symptoms. Prioritize this empowering form of self-care and explore the many benefits of meditation. Your family and those you work with will appreciate it. My Story – Melissa Llarena I'm a meditation practitioner and #1 Amazon bestselling author who has spent years peering into the minds of marketers and executives, both as one of them and as their trusted guide. My articles in ForbesWomen have reached over 4 million readers, but what really lights me up is the deep work I do with people who, like me, have spent years shape-shifting to succeed. My own journey through the corporate world – 10 years at powerhouses like Ogilvy (working on IBM) and P&G (yes, even Charmin!) – taught me firsthand about wearing different hats across 14+ business functions. For the past 13 years, I've had the privilege of coaching over 200 marketing and advertising executives worldwide, having raw, honest conversations about what it really costs us to morph ourselves every single day. When I'm hosting the Mom Founder Imagination Hub podcast, I get to dive deep with remarkable leaders like Beth Comstock and GaryVee, exploring how to tap into our most overlooked superpower: imagination. My psychology degree from NYU, Dartmouth MBA, and Transformational Coaching certification gave me the foundation, but it was the pandemic that showed me – and my clients – that we needed something more. In 2021, when ambition felt impossible and imagination seemed out of reach, I realized we were all exhausted from trying to power through. That's when I took a leap – pausing my coaching practice to write a book filled with soul-searching questions, while earning my meditation certification from the Jack Kornfield organization. Now, I blend all these pieces – my corporate insider experience, thousands of honest conversations, and meditation wisdom – into workshops, sessions, and immersions that truly connect. Using imaginative meditation, mindfulness practices that even the most restless executives love, and revealing journaling exercises, I help people find their way back to themselves. Because here's what I know: when we stop losing ourselves every time life or business throws us a curveball, we can finally use our energy for what really matters – creating the impact we're meant to make.
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266: Mindful Leadership: A Female Leader's Guided Meditation to Break Through Creative Blocks
Have you ever told yourself "I'm not creative enough" to solve a business challenge? In this episode, Melissa guides female leaders and mom founders through a powerful meditation practice designed to break free from limiting beliefs about creativity. Through a combination of mindfulness techniques and guided reflection, you'll: Learn how to identify and challenge creativity-limiting beliefs Experience a body scan meditation for releasing tension Practice reframing negative thoughts about your creative abilities Discover how to access your natural problem-solving capabilities Transform your relationship with creativity and innovation The episode includes a practical meditation exercise you can use whenever you face a business challenge requiring creative solutions. Melissa shares personal stories, including her experience in business school and conversations with her son about creativity, to illustrate how we can expand our definition of what it means to be creative. Connect with Melissa: melissa.llarena [at] gmail.com About your host Melissa Llarena of the Mom Founder Imagination Hub podcast I'm a meditation practitioner and #1 Amazon bestselling author who has spent years peering into the minds of marketers and executives, both as one of them and as their trusted guide. My articles in ForbesWomen have reached over 4 million readers, but what really lights me up is the deep work I do with people who, like me, have spent years shape-shifting to succeed. My own journey through the corporate world – 10 years at powerhouses like Ogilvy (working on IBM) and P&G (yes, even Charmin!) – taught me firsthand about wearing different hats across 14+ business functions. For the past 13 years, I've had the privilege of coaching over 200 marketing and advertising executives worldwide, having raw, honest conversations about what it really costs us to morph ourselves every single day. When I'm hosting the Mom Founder Imagination Hub podcast, I get to dive deep with remarkable leaders like Beth Comstock and GaryVee, exploring how to tap into our most overlooked superpower: imagination. My psychology degree from NYU, Dartmouth MBA, and Transformational Coaching certification gave me the foundation, but it was the pandemic that showed me – and my clients – that we needed something more. In 2021, when ambition felt impossible and imagination seemed out of reach, I realized we were all exhausted from trying to power through. That's when I took a leap – pausing my coaching practice to write a book filled with soul-searching questions, while earning my meditation certification from the Jack Kornfield organization. Now, I blend all these pieces – my corporate insider experience, thousands of honest conversations, and meditation wisdom – into workshops, sessions, and immersions that truly connect. Using imaginative meditation, mindfulness practices that even the most restless executives love, and revealing journaling exercises, I help people find their way back to themselves. Because here's what I know: when we stop losing ourselves every time life or business throws us a curveball, we can finally use our energy for what really matters – creating the impact we're meant to make. TRANSCRIPT Hello there. This is Melissa, your host behind the mom founder imagination hub podcast. This unedited episode is really geared towards any mom or female leader who has a business challenge that they must overcome with greater creativity. Someone who is seeking to find the inner innovator that. Maybe she once had once felt, but has been struggling to bring back to the forefront. My intention is for you to feel empowered. My intention is for you to feel creative enough to solve whatever you're facing. Business challenge you wish to solve this very week. Now you may not know this, but over the last 13 years, I have coached female leaders who have shared their deepest, darkest, innermost secrets, such as why they actually leave different organizations or bosses or teams, or the things that they wish they could have done. Done. Had they been given the ability to speak up or the ability to step up, you name it, I've heard it. And with these ideas in mind, I wanted to just bring forth this one limiting belief that I heard consistently in my line of work, career coaching, female leaders, primarily in the advertising and marketing function. And it was this, this idea that I'm not creative, or I don't see myself as a creative person. The idea that whatever it is to be a creative is something that is impossible to achieve, to be, if I wasn't originally hired. on literally the creative team, oftentimes from an agency perspective. And so I want to help guide you through a meditation, also a little bit of a journaling exercise so that you can reestablish your relationship with this idea that you are creative, you get to be creative, and it is through your creativity that you can actually solve some problems. So let's go into this idea of thinking that you're really good at something. For me, I remember being in business school. It could have been maybe like the first week where I was in a group of, I think it was like four of us and we had an opportunity to review one another's resumes and I remember at this time. time before I became a career coach before I was, you know, also designated by the career development office at Tuck business school as a career coach of sorts. I knew that I was really good. Good at helping people promote their skills, their relationships, their abilities, their desires. And so I really stepped up. I remember being on a picnic table in Hanover. It was a sunny summer day, which is pretty unusual because it starts snowing. I think like the end of September in New Hampshire, but it was a beautiful sunny day and we were looking at one another's resumes and I just felt really good. I spoke. up. I had very strong opinions pertaining to ways that my peers should articulate their wins, their experiences. And to kind of quote Sheryl Sandberg, I was like totally leaning in to that experience. So that was something that I was clearly. Good at, and I felt like I could speak up then of course, for you, like there has to be maybe even in recent memory where there's something that you're really fricking good at. And you may have had your own inner source of confidence to speak up, raise your hand, share your area of expertise. And it is in that spirit with that. Energy that I would love, love, love during this episode to remind you that you get to feel that way about your creativity and your sense of innovativeness. And you get to feel as much as a contributor to a creative challenge as anyone else on your team or in your surroundings. So I'll give you a chance to kind of, you know, really think through that moment when you felt super, super confident, and I will give you an opportunity to do so in a very mindful way, but I just want to caveat this. Right now, I am going to overtly ask you to become aware of a situation where you felt so confident. And as much as I would like to be almost like Jiminy Cricket in your back pocket and remind you how you do have these moments, in regular life, this is challenging. And oftentimes, We forget. And so I would invite you even from like a career perspective. This is just like a pro tip here, but even from a career perspective, as tactically as your resume, make sure that you have at least one of a story or a moment that you just love to freaking tell related to something that you believe you're really good at and why might that be important because God knows You are nervous during a job interview. So I would encourage you, or even like a pitch, if you own a business. So I would encourage you to have that quote unquote Easter egg, at least one of them on your resume. So now let's just take a moment to reflect. So take an opportunity to sit comfortably. You might be on the floor. You might be on a chair. You might even lie down. I encourage you to just take a chance to breathe in and breathe out and just be present to think of one of those moments when you were doing something because you knew that you were really, really good at it. I'll give you a moment to think this through and keep breathing in. Now, if you're new to meditating or considering this idea of taking a mindful pause and just focusing on the breath, that was just a minute. Now there's no competition. We're not going for some sort of endurance here, but I just want to share with you the short period of time that it took for you to reflect mindfully. about one of those moments when you did something that you felt you were good at. And I say that because you can always return to a good memory throughout the day as you encounter moments that are a little harder to wrap your mind around. Okay. So hold that moment in your pocket. Not so much like Jiminy Cricket, but please do hold that moment in your pocket because That moment symbolizes that there are so many things that you just don't bring to the top of your mind that serve as reminders of the skills and qualities that you bring to the table. And sometimes it's just hard to constantly recall those upon command. But as I showed you right now, you were able to do so just by returning. To your breath now as it relates to something that you may not feel as much confidence in these thoughts are Really? What what we call fear based or fear driven beliefs and The insight here is that they're not always true just because you think it Just because you repeat it, just because other people think it and repeat it about you, it doesn't necessarily mean that it's true all the time in every instance. Now, constructive criticism is a wonderful thing. People say it's a gift, but I gotta be honest, I rather other things. But net net, the point I want to make here is that, You can actually take a fear based or fear driven belief. and reframe it or change it in a way that pulls you towards a desired goal. And therein lies the practice of mindfulness in the simple awareness, almost like you're a Third person looking at a scene where you're giving yourself a little distance between the belief, the thought or emotion. And you're also opening up the opportunity for you to respond, instead of just knee jerk react, right? And so let's play with this idea. Let's imagine that in third grade, you had some sort of drawing that in your mind, you thought was some amazing Picasso, but in your teacher's mind, she just thought it was just not cool. I don't even have a bad thing. I want to say about a third graders drawing, but let's just imagine she didn't put it up on the hallways. So didn't get like the, the attention that you would have hoped. In her opinion, your art was not so wonderful. In your opinion, in that moment, you thought it was really beautiful. And isn't it interesting? Because it is you who carries that thought. in your mind for a long time thereafter that moment. And so, because you have your teacher's criticism or you have your own thoughts about how creative that drawing was, that would have informed your idea of what it was to be creative. That would have informed your thinking around whether you were creative. And this could be something that has happened decades ago, but it's something that maybe you've heard. on repeat in your mind from that single instance, right? And so I want to just offer you the opportunity. If you have a creative challenge upfront that you want to solve this week, I just want to invite you to give yourself the best fricking chance you could possibly give yourself and not count yourself out. Just because some third grade teacher said, Your artwork sucked. When it comes to creativity, I want to share with you this story. I was having lunch or some meal with one of my kids and my son was like, Creative? I'm not creative. When I think of creativity, I just think of paint brushes. And so I had that conversation with him and I said, Wait a minute. You are so inquisitive, your questions are creative, like being curious and asking questions and piecing together different words, ending that statement with a question mark and having different responses and reaction to what you say is a freaking creative thing. And I say freaking because we don't use those words in my house. Point of the matter is this. It was a reframe, right? So maybe, maybe it's true. Maybe my son is not creative from a arts and craft perspective. But if you look at creativity and you open up your ability to interpret what it could mean, what it could look like, sound like, et cetera, therein lies the ability to reframe a consistent, persistent thought that you just imagined to be completely factual in every instance. So again, this is so normal, especially when it's a thought where you have been criticized, or it's like a warning, you know, like, don't go down hallway because you'll slip on a banana peel. I don't know. I made that up, right? And then you just think that all your life, there's always a banana peel down that hallway. Like these are just things that are open and available opportunities for you to question, open up in your mind's eye and reconsider if it is not serving you for the task at hand. And so that's why I wanted to just kind of open up this thought experiment, right? So here we go. Let's just imagine you were told you're not creative in the past. Let's just imagine really deep dive that this is something that's been persistent, like you've heard it from everyone around you, that you are not creative, you're not innovative, but here you are this week, maybe you have your own business and you need to solve a challenge creatively, because thinking linearly has not worked in the past. I think I have like a, I don't even know, maybe like 572 examples of that. I'll give you an example. So let's just imagine you want to open up your lead flow. And what does that mean? That means that you want more people on the phone with you so that you can have these sales conversations. Linear thinking might be, okay, I'm going to start with, you know, ad spend. Whereas creative thinking might be, wait a minute, who else might have this audience? How can I collaborate with them such that they win, we win. Right. And so again, It's really about almost like placing doubt in something that you feel is a no longer working for you because you have to solve this challenge as a business owner, or be something that you want to kind of like disentangle. So that you can actually find out what the truth is of your reality. Like, are you creative? But maybe the situation has not been right for your flavor of creativity. Okay. So let's not get too far here because I see myself re imagining the whole episode, but I want to be sure that I take you to the meditation. So here we go. I want you to really think through. today about how you could increase your awareness of your beliefs around being creative, innovative, a problem solver, so that you can mindfully see them for what they are, which is malleable, In the moment. So again, a strongly held belief that you may have had is one that might not hold truth in every scenario. It might no longer be serving you in today's episode, right? So for me, this idea of math, math is something that, you know, I could say, Oh, I've sucked that math. Do I have proof? I don't. Absolutely. But might I also have proof that tells me a different story? And the answer to that is yes. Isn't that interesting? The only way for me to have, you know excelled in a mathematical school. Or mathematical pursuit, for example, back to business school on the topic of capital markets. The only way I was able to actually knock it out of the ballpark, this exam that I recall kind of acing and feeling really confident and good about was because I was able to just almost for for that set of hours just totally mute the fact that one time I wasn't so good at math and this time I was able to be that person who always rises to a challenge, right? And so again, it's about just placing a little bit of doubt in this strongly held belief, because there might be a situation or a moment where that belief is just totally, totally false. Now you can't bullshit yourself, like, I mean, I guess you could try, but I'm pretty sure you'll figure it out soon enough. But what you can do is at least get an inch or two closer to To a belief that takes you where you want to go. So let's go now and do a little bit of a meditation. And this meditation is going to be different than just, you know, sitting down with our thoughts and focusing on our breath, because what I have noticed is that. A lot of people assume that meditating means we have no thoughts. We're emptying everything that's in our mind and we're doing a bit of a mental cleanse. While that might be true because we have a ton going on in our minds, it's also an opportunity to just simply be that witness To the thoughts that are already in our head, but we might just not notice because we've got a lot of things going on. So that's what this is going to be. So I will guide you through a set of questions. We will go through one thought that you might have or believe is true pertaining to whether you're creative or innovative, and then we'll see where you come out on the other end. You ready for it? Okie dokie. So let's do this. Close your eyes, assuming you're not driving, and I want you to just find a comfortable way to either be sitting, standing, or lying down. This is the interesting bit. If your belief is that you need to sit for meditation, or that there's even a right way to meditate, I'm literally going to show you that that is just a belief that might be right for you, but it doesn't always have to be the case. All right. So just find a way for you to be comfortable and we'll do a little bit of a body scan. So imagine from the top of your head, a sense of calmness pouring down your scalp. And you're just breathing naturally. Now imagine your breath clearing out any tension you may feel from your forehead down to your cheeks. Make sure your left cheek feels relaxed and your right cheek. Continue allowing your breath pass through your neck and feel the ease. as best you can. Continue along your upper back, the breath going down, just adding ease wherever it passes. Down to your mid back, then to your lower, breathe out. Notice your arms, breathe through your left arm, breathe in, breathe through your right arm. Again, Releasing any, any tension as thoughts will find their way in and out. Just know that is totally. normal. Just breathe in, then sink into your seat further and sink deeper. I'm going to give you a couple of minutes as you're relaxed as possible with this ease to answer this one question. What thoughts pop up when you think about yourself as a creative being or innovative thinker? Consider One of those thoughts, perhaps the one thought that feels the most defining or the one thought that might have been secretly holding you back through the years, have that one thought pertaining to creativity or innovation. And whether you're capable of being creative or innovative in light of a challenge, hold that one thought, keep that one thought in mind. Now, silently to yourself, I invite you to ask yourself a set of questions all pertaining to that one thought, that one limiting belief pertaining to whether you are creative or innovative. The first question said in two ways, is it really true? Might it be real, but not really, really true. Thank you. as it relates to that one limiting belief pertaining to creativity. I want to ask you, what is it like to live with this belief? What has it been like to live with this belief? In light of this limiting belief, I want to invite you to just notice how it feels in your body. Notice how your body and heart might be suffering with this belief inside might help to think of an instance of when this belief got in your way from a relaxed position. And then ask yourself silently, what does the vulnerable place inside of you need right now in relation to how you feel? this belief feels, how it's held you back. And now as we're closing this mindfulness practice, who would you be without this belief? Who would you be without this thought? Who would you be this week without this belief or thought? Would you be that person who assembles the team to solve the creative challenge? Would you be able to solve this creative challenge On your own, would you be the perfect person, maybe even the only person who can solve this challenge because you're creative in just the right way. As we close this meditation, I just want to invite you to, to really soften your original belief. Whatever that limiting belief was, place a little doubt in it or swap it completely for one that That you can hold. So again, it's not about BSing yourself, but maybe it's less declarative, less fact sounding, less debilitating. Maybe it's just about opening up who you get to be, like your identity and who you are. I am someone who's possible creativity. I am a problem solver. I can figure this out. And just giving yourself some space so that you can play with an open heart so that when you approach the challenge this week, there's no need to run away. Instead, you're able to explore with what actually is available to you. You're able to. Try your hand at something you may have never thought you could do, but maybe you realize that you're really freaking good at. And so I invite you, if you have a piece of paper or journal, not that you needed to at this very moment, but if you do just scribble some ideas. scribble some ideas of how you intend to approach this week's business challenge more creatively. I know you can do it. And when it comes to mindfulness and when it comes to meditating, there's so many ways to approach it. And I really think that There's so many tools that do not require anyone other than yourself. And there's also so many different ways of using the tool of meditation and mindfulness. And this has been one that I have seen work really well when it comes to coaching clients in terms of their limiting beliefs. It's this idea that. By being that third party awareness level of these thoughts and beliefs that we have passing through our minds, it gives us an opportunity to start poking holes in some of these thoughts and beliefs that are no longer serving us or holding us back or have us feeling like we're totally stuck. And so this week I invite you to be more. intentional about whether or not everything that passes through your head is a fact and completely the law in terms of who you are. And I invite you to be mindful and more open to the fact that Your beliefs, your thoughts really influence your behaviors. So if you could imagine playing this out, if you get to a place where you believe that there are instances where you have been creative and you look at this week's challenge with that fresh perspective and hope, then you're actually able to, and willing to, and will behave in a different, a new way. Versus retreating, right? And not even raising your hand to solve that creative challenge because you're just not creative. So I hope this was helpful to you. I hope this serves you. I hope that it gives you an opportunity to just think about mindfulness and using the tool of meditation in a new way. It is not just about sitting down, feeling zen, and, you know, having all the negative Thoughts of the day wash out of your head. It can absolutely give you that extra sense of reality and a greater, more sophisticated level of presence so that you can be very intentional about how you use the thoughts, beliefs, and ideas that have crossed your mind or people tell you. Because again, A thought, a belief is not necessarily some sort of hard and steadfast fact. It can actually be malleable for the moment. Have a wonderful day. If you got value out of this, I would absolutely love to hear from you. To hear from you right now. I'm super excited about email because I am on a social media break. I think I've been on one for weeks now. So go ahead and email me and put my email in the show notes. It's melissa. larinaatgmail. com. And let me know if you got value out of this conversation. I would love to hear from you. And if there's a, challenge or situation where you could use the presence or the ease or the thoughtfulness that introducing meditation in your life can provide, let me know. I'm happy to work with you as well. Thank you so much.
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265: The Back to Work Mandate: A Leader's Meditation for Peace Amid Change
When was the last time you actually looked forward to your commute? If you're facing a back-to-work mandate, chances are 'never' just crossed your mind. But what if your daily journey to the office could become more than dead time – what if it could become your secret weapon for better leadership? Today, we're turning the dreaded commute into an opportunity for mindful leadership, and I'll guide you through a meditation practice you can do with your eyes wide open, whether you're on a train, bus, or stuck in traffic. In this episode, we explore how leaders can transform their mandatory commute into a powerful mindfulness practice. Learn a practical, eyes-open meditation technique specifically designed for busy professionals navigating the return to office. You'll discover how to: Use your commute time as a leadership preparation tool Practice mindfulness safely while in transit Set powerful intentions for your workday Manage stress before walking into the office Transform a daily obligation into a meaningful practice Perfect for leaders and professionals dealing with back-to-work mandates, this meditation offers a fresh perspective on the daily commute. Whether you're a seasoned meditator or completely new to the practice, you'll find practical techniques to make your journey work for you, not against you. If this meditation resonated with you and you'd like to bring something similar to your team or company, I'd love to hear from you. I'm excited to be offering meditation and mindfulness solutions for stress and burnout, both remotely and in-person. Email me [melissa.llarena [at] gmail.com] to share what your company needs – whether it's regular guided sessions, workshops, or custom solutions for your unique challenges. Let's work together to create more mindful, resilient workplaces. About your host Melissa Llarena of the Mom Founder Imagination Hub podcast I'm a meditation practitioner and #1 Amazon bestselling author who has spent years peering into the minds of marketers and executives, both as one of them and as their trusted guide. My articles in ForbesWomen have reached over 4 million readers, but what really lights me up is the deep work I do with people who, like me, have spent years shape-shifting to succeed. My own journey through the corporate world – 10 years at powerhouses like Ogilvy (working on IBM) and P&G (yes, even Charmin!) – taught me firsthand about wearing different hats across 14+ business functions. For the past 13 years, I've had the privilege of coaching over 200 marketing and advertising executives worldwide, having raw, honest conversations about what it really costs us to morph ourselves every single day. When I'm hosting the Mom Founder Imagination Hub podcast, I get to dive deep with remarkable leaders like Beth Comstock and GaryVee, exploring how to tap into our most overlooked superpower: imagination. My psychology degree from NYU, Dartmouth MBA, and Transformational Coaching certification gave me the foundation, but it was the pandemic that showed me – and my clients – that we needed something more. In 2021, when ambition felt impossible and imagination seemed out of reach, I realized we were all exhausted from trying to power through. That's when I took a leap – pausing my coaching practice to write a book filled with soul-searching questions, while earning my meditation certification from the Jack Kornfield organization. Now, I blend all these pieces – my corporate insider experience, thousands of honest conversations, and meditation wisdom – into workshops, sessions, and immersions that truly connect. Using imaginative meditation, mindfulness practices that even the most restless executives love, and revealing journaling exercises, I help people find their way back to themselves. Because here's what I know: when we stop losing ourselves every time life or business throws us a curveball, we can finally use our energy for what really matters – creating the impact we're meant to make. TRANSCRIPT: Welcome to the era of returning to work on-site. In this moment, I invite you to be gentle with yourself as you navigate this significant change. Your feelings about this transition - whether excitement, reluctance, or a mix of both - are all valid. I want to give you an opportunity to breathe while entering your next tunnel... or at a bare minimum, not to take it out on your team once you get out. Brace for this change in how you move, work, and problem-solve the logistics of no longer being at home. Pre-plan how you intend to use this time in between spaces. Give yourself a chance to reimagine the purpose of your daily commute. Feel the weight of your body where you sit or stand. Notice the points of contact with your seat or the floor. This awareness can be your anchor throughout your journey. While living in Sydney, I would ride a double-decker over the Harbour Bridge, and it was then that I decided to use my travel time to be my me time... the me time that I didn't always have. I gave myself a 30-day meditation challenge that sparked this need to get in my meditating whenever I could, and that's when necessity became the mother of my mindful invention. This was when I started meditating with my eyes open. If you've never thought about sitting still, focusing on your breath, and keeping your eyes with a slight open gaze, then consider this. Whilst thinking about you, should you be closing your eyes on a mode of transit in a big city? Heck, no! Is it wise to close your eyes while driving? Clearly not. However, closing your eyes is not the only way to bring a more mindful approach to your daily commute. There are other ways to use this time for yourself, for your pursuits, for your mental health. I want to invite you to meditate with me as you head to or from work. I want to invite you to change your perspective, especially these early days of embarking on a daily commute. Begin with an intention for the workday.... the reality is that as a species we tend to react. React to workplace BS. React to changes in our patterns. React to neighboring commuters. React based on our environment. It is here and now that I invite you to bring intentionality to today. Think about your intention for today.... Do you intend to be a better listener than you were yesterday... asking follow-up questions to gain a deeper understanding of situations? Do you intend to give people the benefit of the doubt.... be more cognizant that everyone has their own struggles? Do you intend to bring more certainty into a room or team setting... so that employees feel more secure in their jobs despite what the news might be featuring? Do you intend to bring compassion to yourself and others as everyone adjusts to this change? Do you intend to notice moments of connection with others, even in passing? Take the deepest breath you can.... In/out [Pause 2 seconds] In/out [Pause 2 seconds] In/out [Pause 2 seconds] Often we take the pace of the environments in which we find ourselves.... if you are in an urban center.... you'll quicken your walking speed or talking speed.... if you are in a more laid-back setting you may catch yourself adjusting.... As you breathe in and out... simply notice that you can adjust your pace to suit your needs.... your bus or train may be going at 30 mph, 80 mph, or at a standstill... it's of no consequence to you nor to your breath... just take it in and let it out. Now there is no right nor wrong way of meditating... it's a practice.... it's not about forgetting.... it's about returning.... so you are going and you get to return and in that shift you are performing your own little act of rebellion. Your mind wants to go here, there, everywhere, and you gently return to your breath... your breath is your home. Keep breathing in and out... Notice what thoughts capture your attention and just return to the breath... It's not so impressive to meditate in a silent room on a meditation pillow by yourself.... it's more impressive to meditate in a loud space on a hard bench or whilst standing in a space that requires more of you to choose your breath. Take a moment to visualize your day ahead. Perhaps there's a challenging conversation or an important meeting waiting for you. With each breath, imagine yourself moving through these moments with clarity and presence. When you arrive at work, try taking three conscious breaths before entering each meeting – a micro-practice to center yourself in the present moment. Commuting is the ultimate practice... in my opinion.... It's not easy to find a comfortable way of being at times It's not easy to demand quiet It's not easy to breathe sometimes It can be said that the same is true in like to respond in a world that is persistently seeking a reaction As you stay put, remind yourself that you get to be intentional with how you use this time. Remind yourself of the pace of your breath. Use this time to plan your response. Give yourself a chance to live out your brand of leadership in a way that encourages your team to do the same. As you get ready to complete this meditation, remember that this commute isn't just taking you to work - it's taking you to people who count on your presence and leadership. Each breath can help you show up as the leader you aspire to be. I invite you to begin to move your toes and fingers at your pace. Truly give yourself an opportunity to use this time to mindfully approach the people and business challenges that will arise, and know that you can always return to your breath as a reliable reminder to whatever intention you set out for yourself today. And on your journey home, let each breath help you process and release the day's events, creating space between your work life and your home life. Sending you composure today... If this meditation resonated with you and you'd like to bring something similar to your team or company, I'd love to hear from you. I'm excited to be offering meditation and mindfulness solutions for stress and burnout, both remotely and in-person. Email me [melissa.llarena [at] gmail.com to share what your company needs – whether it's regular guided sessions, workshops, or custom solutions for your unique challenges. Let's work together to create more mindful, resilient workplaces.
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264: Why Captivate is My 2025 Word: A Mom Founder's Challenge to Think Differently
Ever notice how everyone picks the same predictable words for their New Year - peace, joy, freedom? What if your 2025 word of the year could be something totally unexpected that lights up everyone's face when you share it? 2025: The Year of Captivation Yep, that's MY word this year. 2025 is not just another year—it's the year of captivation for me. In the past, my time has been driven by business goals, from client acquisition to serving a growing audience predominantly of mothers. This year, however, my focus is on discovering and pursuing what truly captivates me—my word of the year. --- **Captivation: Inspired by Family and Stories** Reflecting on memorable moments of captivation, I am reminded of summers spent with my grandmothers in Miami and Puerto Rico. My Cuban grandmother and her family were expert storytellers, captivating me with tales from their lives and adventures. These moments instilled in me a love for storytelling and a fascination with human expression. --- **Choosing a Word of the Year: A Journey of Self-Discovery** I invite you to join me on this journey of selecting a word of the year—a concept popularized by Danielle Laporte in her work on desire mapping. Find a word that resonates deeply, one that isn't commonly chosen but is authentic to the sensation you aim to experience. Whether it's a bold choice like "captivating" or something uniquely personal, let it guide your experiences and interactions. --- **Practice Captivation in Everyday Life** Achieving a sense of captivation doesn't necessarily require grand gestures; it can be found in simple, everyday experiences. Whether it's listening intently to your child's story or discovering a new passion, these moments hold the potential to enrich our lives profoundly. --- **Conclusion: A Year of Unforeseen Opportunities** As we traverse 2025, I aim to provide you with content that not only captivates but also adds value to your life. This year will be marked by transformative changes in how I approach my business and personal life, integrating my newly acquired skills as a meditation practitioner. Let's explore how we can make this year uniquely ours. I encourage you, my listeners, to think expansively, embrace words that are different, and stand unafraid in your journey. Happy New Year! While we're at it, why not make it official? Subscribe or follow the Mom Founder Imagination Hub podcast, and feel free to send me a note afterwards so I can thank you—seriously, feel encouraged to email me melissa.llarena (at) gmail.com. Let's keep this engaging dialogue alive as we explore the art of captivation together. Have a captivating week ahead! This episode is brought to you by: My free anti-burnout 30-day resource for mompreneurs! Momentum usually comes at the cost of burn-out because what it truly takes to build something upfront is more energy and effort than a lot of us have to spare….which is why….I created this planner. This mom-friendly planner links your vision to daily actions, helping you stay focused and energized as you build profitable relationships. Whether you want to find a new job, get new clients, or launch up your ultimate podcast while focusing on mission critical consistent action steps each day…starting with a 30-day timeframe…this action tracker and planner was made with YOU in mind. Set yourself up for a successful year and an even bigger one ahead! It also sees to it that you replenish your energy to prevent burnout. ($97 value, helps avoid a $2,400 trip to the ER from exhaustion). https://bit.ly/imagineaplan Subscribe and Review Have you subscribed to my podcast for new moms who are entrepreneurs, founders, and creators? I'd love for you to subscribe if you haven't yet. I'd love it even more if you could drop a review or 5-star rating over on Apple Podcasts. Simply select "Ratings and Reviews" and "Write a Review" then a quick line with your favorite part of the episode. It only takes a second and it helps spread the word about the podcast for writer moms. This holiday season purchase a copy or two of Fertile Imagination, email me your picture (under the tree by the candles) using this email address melissa [at ]melissallarena.com , and then on Christmas day I hope to share these images across my social media. Let's support the moms we are and love this holiday season! Shop Fertile Imagination for the holidays! – https://bit.ly/fertilebook About Fertile Imagination You can be a great mom without giving up, shrinking, or hiding your dreams. There's flexibility in how you pursue anything – your role, your lifestyle, and your personal and professional goals. The limitations on your dreams are waiting to be shattered. It's time to see and seize what's beyond your gaze. Let's bridge your childhood daydreams with your grown-up realities. Imagine skipping with your kids along any path – you, surpassing your milestones while your kids are reaching theirs. There's only one superpower versatile enough to stretch your thinking beyond what's been done before: a Fertile Imagination. It's like kryptonite for impostor syndrome and feeling stuck when it's alert! In Fertile Imagination, you will awaken your sleeping source of creative solutions. If you can wake up a toddler or a groggy middle schooler, then together with the stories in this book – featuring 25 guests from my podcast Unimaginable Wellness, proven tools, and personal anecdotes – we will wake up your former playmate: your imagination! Advance Praise "You'll find reality-based strategies for imagining your own imperfect, fulfilling life in this book!" —MARTHA HENNESSEY, former NH State Senator "Melissa invites the reader into a personal and deep journey about topics that are crucially important to uncover what would make a mom (and dad too) truly happy to work on…even after the kids are in bed." —KEN HONDA, best-selling author of Happy Money "This book is a great purchase for moms in every stage of life. Melissa is like a great friend, honest and wise and funny, telling you about her life and asking you to reflect on yours." —MAUREEN TURNER CAREY, librarian in Austin, TX TRANSCRIPT Welcome to 2025. It is Melissa, your host of the Mom Founder Imagination Hub podcast. Wow, like what was that? Seriously, it's so funny. I just returned from a trip to the colonies, as I like to refer the states that I have a lot of family in. So we went to New York, we went to New Jersey and we went to Connecticut. Yeah. And I will say that the experience was a bit of a whirlwind, but it ended with just like feeling really, really sick. And so I'm on the mend, definitely feeling very, very. alive and excited and pumped about 2025. This morning, I already went to the gym. I did my 10, 000 steps, went to the groceries, did some laundry part two. I mean, it's been a productive set of hours on this feast of the epiphany Three Wise Men Day. I even put incense with the scent of myrrh for the occasion of the Three Wise Men. You remember? What did they give baby Jesus? Frankincense, myrrh, and gold. So I would say, you know, it's been a really interesting start to the new year. And in this unedited episode, you thoroughly hear that I still have the remnants of a, a bad set of bacteria, virus, But notwithstanding, I feel good. I feel good about 2025. And the reason why I do is because it's going to be different than years past. Years past have been really dictated by business initiatives, figuring out what needs to happen in order to bring in new clients, in order to better serve, You know, a brand new target audience being you a mom and also, you know, just a lot of novelty when it comes to the different ways that people approach, you know, lead generation and all that businessy stuff. And so this year is going to be a little bit different. It's really going to be about figuring out what. exactly captivates me. That is the word for me of 2025. And as I tell individuals, my word, I am met with this whole idea of, wow, that's crazy, but like in a good way, because it's definitely a very high vibe word, captivating, captivate to captivate. I put a lot of thought into it. And just to kind of share a story of those moments when I have been the most captivated, I remember every single summer I would spend a month in Miami and a month in Puerto Rico with my respective grandmothers. And my Cuban grandmother on one hand was A really good storyteller, as was my entire family from a paternal perspective. And I would say that they really got into storytelling. So let's imagine they got home from work and they all worked in the police department and they had these amazing stories. Whether it was, you know, about criminals or if it was about, I don't even know, a salsero that they would have invited to like a Christmas party. I mean, a lot of my memories are a little bit of a Patchwork quilt, should I say? Point of the matter, they would use their body to really express themselves. They would stand up in the middle of the living room to absolutely, you know, be on stage, quote unquote. And I felt captivated, completely engrossed in what they were saying. And I'm pretty sure I had no idea what they were really, really saying. Because I was a little girl, but I was always really intrigued by the way they express themselves and the stories they would tell. And that's why for me, that is the word that popped up, captivating to captivate. And when I started looking up what it meant, it also had this idea that there has to be a willingness. be captivated. So as I think through this word of the year for myself, I invite you to think beyond some of the words that are in the atmosphere in your local area. Or wherever it is that you might reside. So, for example, if in your community you might hear words like, Oh, freedom, or peace, or contentment, or words like joy. Why not consider a word like, that is totally left field, but really nails the sensation you're going for. And then in the same way that the person who wrote this book about desire mapping, Danielle Laporte says, she basically said, you know, once you have your word or set of words, it's really about figuring out. a myriad of ways that you can feel that sensation. So if I want to feel engrossed, plugged in or captivated, it's not just like going to great adventure and, you know, going on a roller coaster and maybe I am totally captivated by an amazing ride. It can be something as so simple, so sweet as paying close attention to a little story that a son of mine has, you know, whether it was something that he caught in school or something that he just wants to share with me or retell from a story he has read. So for me, captivating has range. What about you? I would invite you to really think through. what you desire to feel in 2025. For me, as I mentioned, it was being captivated or captivating or captivate people. Because again, if you want a certain feeling, it really behooves you to emit that feeling yourself. So that also implies I have to be captivating. And So there we go. So for you really think that through, think through right now, maybe write it down at some point, a couple of words that really, really ignite something inside of you, something that might be, um, a little sleepy right now. It might be a little bit kind of, you know, not used. Just think of a word that you want to draw attention to in your life. And funny enough, When I chose that word, which is not the most common word I've seen, I started, of course, seeing that word, which has an actual scientific principle attached to it. Kind of like when you buy a particular car, you start to notice all those cars. So, Happy New Year. I'm thrilled that this podcast lives on. I'm thrilled that I had the opportunity to share with you my 2025 word, and I really endeavor to captivate you, captivate you in a way that makes you feel better. After listening to every single episode, and I really do invite you and hope that you can be very patient with me because this is a year of change when it comes to the way I go about, you know, sharing my gifts and talents. This is also going to be a year of change in terms of how I think about my business and my role and how I decide to you. You know, bring forth everything that I've learned, even new things. I just became a meditation practitioner. It's like official now I'm done with the program. So there'll be a lot of unexpected conversations, but also my ambition is really to make sure that you get value out of each and every single one of them. So in this one, I invite you to think about a word of the year, and I invite you to definitely consider how you might make it. different or set yourself apart from those that are in your area. It might really inspire other people to think more expansively about their own lives and their own experiences. Because every single person I've told this word to, captivating and captivated, like, It just brought a huge smile on their face and they really loved that word. They're like, I have never heard someone use that word in terms of the word of the year for them. And of course I say, I know you haven't because I really like using words that are different. That captivates me, right? It holds my interest. being a little different and, um, unexpected and be unafraid to do either. Okay. Happy new year until next Tuesday. And if we are not official yet, like if you haven't hit follow or subscribe, I invite you to go ahead and do that. Go ahead and do that. And if you want to send me a little note, I will put it in the show notes. Tell me that you actually subscribed or followed me. And. And I'll tell you a captivating story in exchange, I will email you. So you'll see my email in the show notes, have an amazing rest of your week. Thank you again for listening.
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266
263: Work Loudly: A Guide for Female Leaders to Building Your Brand and Reputation in Corporate America
Are you a working mom feeling overwhelmed in your corporate role? Get ready to level up your corporate game as we're hanging out with Sally Ivester, a seasoned pro with 12+ years in big tech. Sally spills the tea on how your mindset and strategy can make or break your career journey. Join us as we explore the art of "working loudly" (no, not banging on your keyboard!) and discover how to be a joy to work with, even on those groggy days. Sally breaks down the importance of building your brand and reputation, especially when you're remote, and gives you practical tips to ensure you're top of mind for all the right reasons. Grab your favorite drink, get comfy, and tune in for a fun, inspiring chat to help you thrive in your career while navigating the chaos of motherhood! In this episode, you will hear: Treat your career like a game—understand the rules and navigate relationships to thrive. Sharing your achievements to build your brand and stay visible for career growth. Setting boundaries and staying active in virtual meetings to stay connected. Consistently delivering and showcasing results is key to building a strong professional reputation. Establishing a personal user manual can help communicate preferences and boundaries. This episode is brought to you by: My free anti-burnout 30-day resource for mompreneurs! Momentum usually comes at the cost of burn-out because what it truly takes to build something upfront is more energy and effort than a lot of us have to spare....which is why....I created this planner. This mom-friendly planner links your vision to daily actions, helping you stay focused and energized as you build profitable relationships. Whether you want to find a new job, get new clients, or launch up your ultimate podcast while focusing on mission critical consistent action steps each day...starting with a 30-day timeframe...this action tracker and planner was made with YOU in mind. Set yourself up for a successful year and an even bigger one ahead! It also sees to it that you replenish your energy to prevent burnout. ($97 value, helps avoid a $2,400 trip to the ER from exhaustion). https://bit.ly/imagineaplan _________________________________________________________________________________ About Sally Ivester Sally Ivester is a corporate veteran with over 12 years of experience in Big Tech. After graduating from an Ivy League school, she struggled to navigate the corporate world on her own. As a history enthusiast, she studied the careers of top performers across industries to uncover the strategies that fueled their success. Now, she helps early-career professionals accelerate their growth with the tools and knowledge needed to thrive in today's competitive workplace. Quotes, that can change your perspective: "The corporate job is a game. And you don't get to choose whether you play it or not. Like if you're in it, you're in it. But you do get to choose whether you play it on easy mode or on hard mode." - Sally Ivester "Self-awareness begins with, I'm not going to be the smartest. I'm not like, there's always going to be things that happen." - Sally Ivester "The way that I think about work loudly is your work does not speak for itself. You need to tell people what is the value that you're providing." - Sally Ivester "I'm a mom, so think of all the things that other moms do. You might be doing the laundry. You might be thinking about all the things that kids should be eating and like putting together the grocery list in the background. No one's asking you to do it, right? But you're doing it because you want to make sure these kids are fed and the family's fed and everything else." - Sally Ivester "The goal is be more present, even though you're not physically present." - Sally Ivester SHARE this episode with your fellow mom founders and empower them to embrace their career journey with confidence! Sally's insights on "working loudly" and career growth are a must-listen for balancing corporate life or leading a business. Let's uplift each other! Supporting Resources: Website: https://beacons.ai/hisallyivester TikTok: https://www.tiktok.com/@hisallyivester Linkedin: www.linkedin.com/in/hisallyivester Instagram: https://www.instagram.com/hisallyivester Subscribe and Review Have you subscribed to my podcast for new moms who are entrepreneurs, founders, and creators? I'd love for you to subscribe if you haven't yet. I'd love it even more if you could drop a review or 5-star rating over on Apple Podcasts. Simply select "Ratings and Reviews" and "Write a Review" then a quick line with your favorite part of the episode. It only takes a second and it helps spread the word about the podcast for writer moms. This holiday season purchase a copy or two of Fertile Imagination, email me your picture (under the tree by the candles) using this email address melissa [at ]melissallarena.com , and then on Christmas day I hope to share these images across my social media. Let's support the moms we are and love this holiday season! Shop Fertile Imagination for the holidays! – https://bit.ly/fertilebook About Fertile Imagination You can be a great mom without giving up, shrinking, or hiding your dreams. There's flexibility in how you pursue anything – your role, your lifestyle, and your personal and professional goals. The limitations on your dreams are waiting to be shattered. It's time to see and seize what's beyond your gaze. Let's bridge your childhood daydreams with your grown-up realities. Imagine skipping with your kids along any path – you, surpassing your milestones while your kids are reaching theirs. There's only one superpower versatile enough to stretch your thinking beyond what's been done before: a Fertile Imagination. It's like kryptonite for impostor syndrome and feeling stuck when it's alert! In Fertile Imagination, you will awaken your sleeping source of creative solutions. If you can wake up a toddler or a groggy middle schooler, then together with the stories in this book – featuring 25 guests from my podcast Unimaginable Wellness, proven tools, and personal anecdotes – we will wake up your former playmate: your imagination! Advance Praise "You'll find reality-based strategies for imagining your own imperfect, fulfilling life in this book!" —MARTHA HENNESSEY, former NH State Senator "Melissa invites the reader into a personal and deep journey about topics that are crucially important to uncover what would make a mom (and dad too) truly happy to work on…even after the kids are in bed." —KEN HONDA, best-selling author of Happy Money "This book is a great purchase for moms in every stage of life. Melissa is like a great friend, honest and wise and funny, telling you about her life and asking you to reflect on yours." —MAUREEN TURNER CAREY, librarian in Austin, TX
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262: Unleash Your Podcasting Potential: Tips for Mom Founders to Overcome Fear and Find Their Voice Online
In the world of podcasting, a lot of newbie hosts get nervous about their voices and the stories they want to share. In this special holiday episode, Melissa teams up with the amazing Anika Jackson to chat about juggling motherhood, entrepreneurship, and podcasting. Anika shares how she helps podcasters find their true voice, streamline their workflow, and grow their influence—all while cracking us up with some hilarious stories (yes, there's even a squirrel costume involved!). Scroll down for image 🔥 If you're a mom dreaming of starting a podcast or just need some inspo on how to juggle creativity and family life, this episode is full of practical tips, laughs, and moments you'll totally relate to! In this episode, you will hear: Overcoming the fear of hearing yourself on recordings. Tips for creating a quiet recording space (even with little ones around). Why quirky and personal stories (like Anika's Playgirl experience!) can captivate audiences. How to align your unique story with your audience's needs. Leveraging podcasting communities for guidance and encouragement. Practical steps for getting started, staying consistent, and embracing imperfection. This episode is brought to you by: My free anti-burnout 30-day resource for mompreneurs! Momentum usually comes at the cost of burn-out because what it truly takes to build something upfront is more energy and effort than a lot of us have to spare....which is why....I created this planner. This mom-friendly planner links your vision to daily actions, helping you stay focused and energized as you build profitable relationships. Whether you want to find a new job, get new clients, or launch up your ultimate podcast while focusing on mission critical consistent action steps each day...starting with a 30-day timeframe...this action tracker and planner was made with YOU in mind. Set yourself up for a successful year and an even bigger one ahead! It also sees to it that you replenish your energy to prevent burnout. ($97 value, helps avoid a $2,400 trip to the ER from exhaustion). https://bit.ly/imagineaplan Squirrel found in the wild. __________________________________________________________________________________ About Anika Jackson Anika Jackson is passionate about creating ecosystems where technology, education, and philanthropy intersect to tackle global challenges. As Philanthropy Manager at the ICL Foundation, she drives community impact initiatives. Anika also teaches at USC's Annenberg School and co-hosts the Mediascape podcast. Her podcast, Your Brand Amplified®, launched in 2020, ranks in the top 1.5% globally on ListenNotes. Anika serves on the UC Santa Barbara Women in Leadership advisory board and Intuit's Small Business Council, offering expertise to a variety of organizations. She's pursuing an MBA at Villanova with a focus on AI/ML and Marketing and is training for Zen Activation certification. Outside of work, she enjoys cooking, baking, traveling, and guiding her daughter through her driver's permit and college tours. Quotes, that can change your perspective: "It's not about you. It's about the message and the connection you're making with the person you're speaking with and the magic that happens when you really connect with a guest or when you are a guest on somebody's podcast. It takes time, but you have to keep practicing. And the more you practice speaking, the more comfortable you get with it, the less you're gonna be concerned about the way you look or the sound of your voice." - Anika Jackson "Just practice, practice, practice. So even practice with friends, practice with smaller, newer podcasts before you get to ones like you and I have hundreds of episodes. So, and I find that for myself, I even change every hundred episodes or so. I tweak something, the way I ask questions, the way I introduce guests, what I put at the front of further intros. There's no one way to do it. You just have to get comfortable speaking and then you'll find your way and you'll tweak it as you go." - Anika Jackson "The biggest impediment is just this idea that I have something important to say. I think, it's really really like the worthiness of sharing a message and maybe in the past you weren't heard or you were ignored maybe as a little girl." - Melissa Llarena "Chances are that one time or that story that you're kind of embarrassed to tell but really shaped who you are is the one that you should lead with on your podcast." - Melissa Llarena SHARE this episode with a friend or fellow mom entrepreneur who's been thinking about starting a podcast or anyone who could use a little inspiration on balancing creativity with family life. Trust us, you don't want to miss the laughs, tips, and stories (yes, squirrel costumes included)! Hit that share button and spread the joy! Supporting Resources: Website: https://www.yourbrandamplified.com Instagram: https://www.instagram.com/amplifywithanika/ Twitter: https://twitter.com/AmplifywAnika Facebook: https://www.facebook.com/amplifywithanika Subscribe and Review Have you subscribed to my podcast for new moms who are entrepreneurs, founders, and creators? I'd love for you to subscribe if you haven't yet. I'd love it even more if you could drop a review or 5-star rating over on Apple Podcasts. Simply select "Ratings and Reviews" and "Write a Review" then a quick line with your favorite part of the episode. It only takes a second and it helps spread the word about the podcast for writer moms. TRANSCRIPT 00:00:00 A: A lot of times we don't like the sound of our voices or we don't like the way we appear on video. But you just get over it because it's not about you. It's about the message and the connection you're making with the person you're speaking with and the magic that happens when you really connect with a guest or when you are a guest on somebody's podcast. 00:00:00 Melissa: Welcome to the Mom Founder Imagination Hub, your weekly podcast to inspire you to dream bigger. Plan out how you're going to get to that next level in business, find the energy to keep going and make sure your creative juices are flowing, so that this way you get what you really want rather than having to settle. Get ready to discover how mom founders have re-imagined entrepreneurship and motherhood. 00:00:43 Melissa: Ever wonder how they do it? Tune in to find out and stretch yourself by also learning from diverse entrepreneurs who might not be moms, but who have lessons you can tailor about how you can disrupt industries and step way outside of your comfort zone. I believe every mom's superpower is her imagination. In this podcast, I'm gonna give you the mindset, methods and tools to unleash yours. Sounds good? Then keep listening. 00:01:13 Melissa: It is almost Christmas. First of all, I wanted to just wish you Merry, Merry Christmas if you celebrate. This is Melissa, your host. And today's episode is going to be perfect for you. If you've ever had the desire to start your own podcast. We're going to cover how to be a present mom and a professional podcaster. We are also going to cover some things like tech. 00:01:39 Melissa: A lot of new podcasters really worry about what sort of microphone to use, what sort of technology is the best. We're also going to go through this idea of maybe not liking the sounds of your voice. I think that stops some incredibly amazing human beings from pushing record. And I don't want it to stop you. And then of course, there's this one big idea that I've heard from so many mom founders in particular, which is what if my story is just not that interesting? And as you might figure, folks that are podcasting are sharing their personal life stories. So I wanted to just share one recent story of mine relative to the holiday season. 00:02:23 Melissa: This holiday season, my kids are doing a school play called Willy Wonka Kids, and I decided to volunteer. I volunteered to create from scratch squirrel costumes. I believe it was the second Johnny Depp version of Willy Wonka, where there was this major appearance of a bunch of squirrels, or a scurry of squirrels. And so, of course, I had to get my costume designer hat on, figure out what materials I needed, consult with AI so that I could articulate the actual materials that I was going to request at Joanne's Fabrics and all the like. 00:03:07 Melissa: Let's put it this way. I feel like I bit off a bit more than I could chew, but I got it done. I got it done and I will put a picture of said squirrel costumes in the show notes. So here's what I encourage you to do. On your device, wherever you're listening to this episode, you're going to see the opportunity to look at the description. In the description, you're gonna see a couple of things. First, you're gonna see that squirrel outfit, which it is worth the look, that is for sure. 00:03:36 Melissa: Second, I wanted to just say before launching into who today's guest is, that this episode is brought to you by something that I also made with my own two hands for you. Here we go. So this episode is brought to you by my free anti-burnout 30 day resource for mompreneurs. It is an action tracker and planner. And here's what makes it totally unlike anything you've ever seen in your life. First of all, it's totally free, so that is a little nuanced. But then second of all, what I know to be true, especially if you're an ambitious human being, is that you're expending more energy out than you are refilling your source of energy. And that is what leads to burnout, especially for moms. 00:04:29 Melissa: So back to the squirrel concept, I was very happy with creating two squirrel outfits, but then I realized I had to create 17 by hand. We're talking couture squirrel costumes. And in that moment, if I had to think about how can I adequately refill my cup, that means about 17 massages. I mean, that's how I calculated it, right? As a squirrel would. 00:05:01 Melissa: And so in this very amazing action planner and tracker, which you can just grab in the show notes. It's a bit.ly link, so it's bit.ly/imagineaplan. What I do is I give you an opportunity to focus on mission critical tasks over the course of 30 days. And here's what that means. So this can be used for launching a podcast. This can be for building any sort of profitable relationships, maybe it's even networking for a job. It can also be getting new clients if you already have your own business. What I also do is give you an opportunity every single day and I hold you accountable to refilling your cup in an imaginative way. These ideas come from my book, Fertile Imagination, which I wrote. I think it's been two years almost at this point, almost, right? So I want you to really take advantage of this. And here's what I know to be true. 00:06:05 Melissa: So this resource, action tracker and planner or the inverse really is something that I will absolutely mark at $97. And that is something that I'm going to wave for podcast listeners today. So you will have an opportunity to go to the show notes, grab it for free and plan out what you intend to do over the course of the next 30 days. This is perfect now as we are almost on the cusp of New Year's, almost 2025. Why not get ahead of the game, feel like you are totally ahead of the game, maybe for once as a mom and plan out your course of action. 00:06:46 Melissa: So grab your action planner and tracker today. It is an anti burnout resource for mompreneurs. It is something that you can fill it in using your desktop and absolutely apply to your one beautiful business career, professional life. Subtle hint, you can even use it to track your steps every single day, as in you heading out the door and executing on that one wonderful weight maintenance, weight loss idea. 00:07:22 Melissa: Back to today's conversation, we have Anika Jackson. Anika Jackson, she is actually working at the USC's Annenberg School. She shapes the next generation of communicators and utilizes her extensive background in public relations, digital media, and strategic communications as a part-time faculty member for the master's program in Digital Media Management. She's also the co-host for MediaSCape: Insights from Digital Changemakers Podcasts and her Your Brand Amplified Business Podcast, which she launched in 2020 and currently ranks in the top 1.5% globally on ListenNotes. 00:08:12 Melissa: You can read more about Anika again in the show notes, same exact place where you might see the YouTube description or you might see the show notes on iTunes or Spotify, wherever you're hearing this conversation. So something that I thought was just really fun about this conversation with Anika is the fact that she is such an interesting storyteller, which is why you saw that coming up clip about her Playgirl time experiences. And that really stood out for me and made me chuckle a lot and I hope it does the same for you so enjoy this conversation. 00:08:50 Melissa: If you're watching this on YouTube, please go ahead and subscribe, follow, hit whatever needs to happen digitally and we will absolutely stay connected and you will get instant access to episodes every single Tuesday. Thank you so much for your time and enjoy the conversation and don't forget to grab the action planner and tracker for free, for now, in the show notes before this conversation ends. Thank you so much and Merry Christmas if you celebrate. Happy Hanukkah if that is the season, the timeframe. Happy everything. Happy holidays. May you feel loved, may you feel hopeful and excited about what's next in life. Bye. 00:09:36 Melissa: Anika Jackson, I am so thrilled to have you on the Mom Founder Imagination Hub. How are you this day? 00:09:44 A: Melissa, I am fantastic and I'm so happy to be here. I love speaking to other mom founders. 00:09:52 Melissa: Yeah, this is gonna be really cool because, because this is like a meeting of the minds, right? We've been in podcasting for some time. I know my approach has been about, oh, getting the best guests and figuring out how to leverage those relationships. It's a lot of what I do with mom founders. But what is it that you do in terms of helping someone who's like, okay, I know that I have a message to communicate. I wanna launch a podcast. What's my first step? Like, how is it that you go about having that conversation with people? 00:10:24 A: I get asked that a lot. How to get started, what equipment do I need, and, or even how do I monetize even though I don't have a podcast yet? So I try to level set with people that it can be really easy to get started, but it's really important to be consistent. So I've built a structure around that based on the tens of thousands of dollars I spent when I thought it was just a hobby and a fun thing to do and then realized it was a business, right? And all of the hours and time and years that I've spent working on other podcasts and then my podcast. 00:10:58 A: So I'm like, I don't want other people to have to go through that same experience. So I want them to understand how to set up their brand, their business structure, all of the things that they need to think about. They need to get a trademark. What is their competitive set? What's their market differentiator? All the things that you would do in any business. 00:11:16 A: And then get into production so how to be a good guest. If you're going to have a guest podcast, you need to be a guest on other podcasts to understand what's missing, what's great about it, and what you can do to give back to your guests in the best way, right? Set up your SOPs and your policies and procedures and your systems so that from the time you book somebody, you have all the right information. It's a very clear roadmap. You do the interview, editing. And then what you provide your guest with, and then what you also utilize for your website for social media. So how you're using it to promote, right? Because it's no good if you just do an episode and you're not actually marketing it. 00:12:01 A: And then, honestly for me, this is such a great networking tool, like yourself. I meet the best people. I have met people I never would have thought I'd have the opportunity to meet. And so, and then a lot of them now we have check-in calls with each other, maybe once a month, once a quarter and we refer business to each other. So it's been an amazing experience. 00:12:24 A: And then we get to the organic growth using paid advertising, because I'm a believer in the whole integrated marketing strategy for any business, including the business of podcasting. And then monetization, so I'm on an ad network. I have advertising. I've had sponsors. I've gone to podcast conferences with companies as a brand ambassador to talk about the user experience of using their product for my podcast. 00:12:50 A: So I have this, and then my background is in PR marketing, brand strategy, and digital media. So I take all of that, put it together to create a platform where people can feel empowered and understand what it will take to gain success for their podcast, whatever that means to them. 00:13:08 Melissa: So here's something that I think is going to be so mom specific. So anyone that's listening, I suspect this is on your mind. So there's a couple of things. So one is having access to a quiet, like you could hear a pin drop full space in order to have an optimal podcast. As a parent, I have three little boys. I have identical twins who are 10 and I have a 13 year old. I am currently in their nicely carpeted bedroom, right? So of course we have the whole sound stuff. However, during the summer seasons or other moments, it's just really hard for me to find a space that's quiet, provided I don't wanna pay those thousands of dollars for that fancy studio that's outside. So let's just crack that nut. How do we solve for that? That's just practical. 00:14:11 A: The first thing you mentioned was having good sound, having good equipment. I don't have -- I haven't upgraded my equipment yet. You have fabulous. I have a Blue Yeti mic, which is under a hundred dollars. It's off to the side, but I have it set so that the sound is only coming from me. So my daughter is 16. She's at school. So I try to also bank episodes because I know when her winter breaks are going to be. I know during the summer I want to travel and not be tethered to my laptop and doing interviews and I want to make sure I'm giving her that time. 00:14:45 A: So if somebody is doing, for instance, a weekly podcast, do a few episodes in advance. I always recommend that before somebody launches their first episode that they have banked episodes. So for me, my only issue during the day when she's at school is my dogs and if they're barking, making noise. So I'm in my living room right now because it's gotten a little warm here in Southern California, warmer than usual. But normally I'd be in my office space in my garage, which is set up with sound barriers, carpet, all of the different things to help create a little bit better sound quality. 00:15:29 Melissa: Okay. So speaking of sound, it's so funny. I had a little ding in the background. So I had my LinkedIn open. Bad Melissa, bad Melissa, you crazy networker. Yeah. I am always networking, but okay. So now we have one way of thinking about podcasting, which is to batch episodes, which means that we have to have a clear idea of like the school calendar. We have to have a clear idea of anything else that might require our attention. And what I'm hearing here is by planning ahead and batching these episodes, we can then be more present moms and present podcasters, which I love. 00:16:13 Melissa: Okay, so now the other question that I know is a big one is some people don't like to hear the sound of their voice. Like this is a thing. And it's so funny because I come from that time of answering machines. And I remember hearing the sounds of my voice and it would just be like, not my thing. So I don't know. Like, how do you think about that? Has that ever even been a thought for you or new podcasters out there anyone listening definitely reach out to us if you have questions about your voice. But go ahead, Anika, do you have any thoughts on that? 00:16:53 A: I've been a lifelong performer. I did debate, did theater in high school and then a little bit in college. I've always loved public speaking, so I'm weird like that. So I've emceed a lot of things. This is a funny story, but the first one was when I was a club promoter in Chicago and it was Playgirl Magazine's 25th anniversary. And they were going around to cities doing a search for the man of the year, whatever. And they were coming to the club I was working in. And so, the powers that be decided I should be the emcee. So I had to just be able to talk on my feet because sometimes somebody wasn't ready to come out and have questions answered and just ask questions on stage. 00:17:44 A: It was definitely probably the most interesting experience I've had, but it was a good lesson on how to be present, how to take a pause when I needed to, to think about my next question, or if I was going to have them do one-armed push-ups or whatever from the stage. And I think that it's really important to realize that a lot of times we don't like the sound of our voices, or we don't like the way we appear on video. 00:18:09 A: But you just get over it because it's not about you. It's about the message and the connection you're making with the person you're speaking with and the magic that happens when you really connect with a guest or when you are a guest on somebody's podcast. It takes time, but you have to keep practicing. And the more you practice speaking, the more comfortable you get with it, the less you're gonna be concerned about the way you look or the sound of your voice because that's what I tell PR clients as well. It's not about you. Let's take the ego out of it. You have a message that is different than what somebody else will share, a different perspective. And that's the magic. That's the beauty. 00:18:48 A: People want to understand from your lived experience. They wanna hear the good, the bad, how you balance life. If you're a single mom, all the ups and downs that we have. And so if you think about that and think about what is something I can share, whether I believe that people are interested in or not. That's where you kind of forget about the voice, the way you look. Of course you want to look polished. You don't want to come with crazy hair if it's a video podcast, but I think those are the things. Just practice, practice, practice. So even practice with friends, practice with smaller, newer podcasts before you get to ones like you and I have hundreds of episodes. 00:19:36 A: And I find that for myself, I even change every hundred episodes or so. I tweak something, the way I ask questions, the way I introduce guests, what I put at the front of further intros. And so it's not, there's no one way to do it. You just have to get comfortable speaking and then you'll find your way and you'll tweak it as you go. And nobody cares if you tweak it. 00:20:00 Melissa: No one notices, just saying. This is so true. I think we have this false belief that other people are thinking about us and our nuances as much as we are. And ultimately, the answer is no. Honestly, and I think the next logical question that comes up for me, because you mentioned this idea of a message is the following. 00:20:31 Melissa: How is it that someone who's considering putting out a podcast, how can they land on the actual message that they want to share with the world? Because a lot of moms, we're going to have opinions about motherhood as an example. We might have opinions about anything, right? Our businesses, if we have businesses, our careers, et cetera. So we have opinions. Like how is it that we choose maybe the one focal area and do we have to, or can you be broad? What are your thoughts? 00:21:09 A: There are a lot of more niche down podcasts. Mine is not. I have two actually, I have one with University of Southern California, where I teach. And that podcast is Insights From Digital Changemakers, right? MediaSCape: Insights From Digital Changemakers. So we talk to people who are of the moment who've maybe had careers but are in the digital space and see what's on the horizon. So that might be a lot of AI people. 00:21:35 A: My podcast, I like to have real conversations. It's Your Brand Amplified. So that's my ethos for what I like to do. I like to help people really shine, figure out what their message is, whether they're an entrepreneur, a small business or an individual. And I wanna help propel their message forward. So the best conversations I have are a little bit all over the place. We'll talk about their business. We'll talk about their background, but then we may, if they're comfortable, weave in being a parent, real life stories, because the storytelling is what helps people get really engaged and see you as a person, not just person on a mic, right? And want to engage with you further, follow you on social, follow your podcast. 00:22:19 A: So my advice would be if you have a specific niche, skincare, beauty, you can weave that in with being a mom, right? But you can also interview people who are, you can do it a couple of different ways, moms in that industry, or you could say, hey, I wanna interview brands and I'm gonna keep the mom part out of it. I might mention it in my podcast, but I'm not going to hit people over the head with it. 00:22:47 A: And I appear on a variety of podcasts. So some are more about business and podcasting or AI or marketing or public relations. Some are about my nonprofit volunteerism and work. Some are about being a mompreneur, a mom founder. And what do we have to do that's a little different probably than other people? How do we balance like you talked about? How do we deal with figuring out where the money's coming from, whether it's from our podcast or other areas of our business and help each other grow and support each other on our journeys. 00:23:20 A: So I always take people through a brand visioning, brand blueprints. So what is your purpose? What do you feel like you're really here and called to do? And then you figure out your vision, your mission, your positioning, and that helps you really fine tune. Oh, this is not where I thought I was going, but this is really who I am and to stick true to who I am. This is the kind of content I wanna put out. And then that can help you shape and formulate. And then you do competitive analysis, see what other podcasts are in the space, see what they're doing really well, or what might be missing. And that's when you figure out your sweet spot. 00:23:58 Melissa: Yeah. And I think something else to kind of just consider, anyone that's listening, is that you can always change course. 00:24:06 A: 100%. 00:24:07 Melissa: I mean, I started my podcast, it was called an Interview with Melissa Lorena, and then I changed it to something else, and here we are, Mom Founder Imagination Hub. I think you evolve as a human being, and that's how you show up to the microphone as the most present moment you. So I think there's grace in that. It's not like, oh my goodness, I just picked a topic and that's it. I'm doing that for life. I'll be 70 or 80 still talking about having babies. No. You know what I mean? Although I probably could. 00:24:42 Melissa: But at this time, I think people have to just realize it's a podcast which is different than a book, might I add. When I wrote my book, Fertile Imagination, for me, I was so petrified. I was like, oh my goodness, here I am writing these sentences and they will be there forever. They'll live through perpetuity. But with a podcast, it's different. There's more flexibility there. And so my question now, and I got to stop saying my question, but for some reason, that's my thing today. Pardon listeners, if it's becoming over the top. 00:25:18 Melissa: But my inquiry, how about that, is the following. So okay, here we go. So here's this person, they're listening, they're driving, and they're saying to themselves, okay, yes, I want to launch a podcast. Now I know that I have to do this analysis and be thoughtful about it. And I know that if I do podcasts, I should thank them because I'm a mom and I don't have quiet space all the time. But I'm really, really just scared and it's beyond the I don't like the sound of my voice. I'm just scared. For no reason in particular. Let's just say that someone is just scared. Period. Any advice there? 00:26:01 A: Yeah. It's like any business. As you mentioned, you can pivot. Nobody cares. Many podcasters I know have had multiple podcasts. Mine started out as just interviewing publicists because I had a PR agency. And then I was like, this doesn't really feel exciting and good and I want to expand to actual businesses and brands and learn their best practices. So what I would say is approach it like that. 00:26:27 A: And also podcasters are probably the most friendly community I've ever come across. We want to help each other succeed. So it is really easy to find your people in this world and you can go to anybody. And there are a lot of resources online. Podcasters United is a great nonprofit that has a lot of information on how to get started or find a community. I mean, there's so many that I could mention. 00:26:51 A: I am starting a community with coaching because I want to help people set up for success and not be scared. I wanna give them, here's the approach that, I'm not gonna give you the exact approach I took because I did this for three years before realizing it was more than a hobby and really got deeper into it. 00:27:12 A: But with that, I'm helping give people a structure of here are tools that I use and let me help you walk through them so that you're not scared and feeling you have to go to five different websites or research different things in different ways. I'm gonna shortcut that for you and then build up a community. And I'm also going to help you with hosting, right? Because I have found a platform that will work with me to create a community where I can host everybody for free for the first year, if they go through my coaching system or I can also give them other options if they don't want to do that. 00:27:47 Melissa: Yeah, absolutely. And I think for me and what I've heard word on the street is what's scary beyond the, oh my goodness, what are people going to think of my message? Are they going to hate me, etcetera is also just this idea of like technology. And I wanted to just share a super quick story that tells you how ridiculous I was at first. 00:28:10 Melissa: When I interviewed James Altucher, I went to his house and I brought my tech stuff. And I also brought with me, by the way, a former podcast guest and a former client as well. So I had a production team because you're going to someone's house that you don't really know. Point of the matter, I basically had no idea where to plug in my thing that I don't even know what it is, but I use the Focusrite tool thingamajig. And so I MacGyvered something in the moment sitting on James Altucher's sofa so that I could get the audio and it worked. And fast forward to today, it was actually plugged into the wrong hole of my device, but it actually worked. 00:28:58 Melissa: So all that to say, where there's a will, there's a way and technology definitely is not end all be all. There's other options even like a clunky iPhone or whatever but I think the biggest impediment is just this idea that I have something important to say. I think it's really a worthiness of sharing a message and maybe in the past you weren't heard, you were ignored, maybe as a little girl. And I just want anyone that's listening to this conversation between me and Anika to just imagine to yourself what would be possible if that belief was just pulled out of your head and you really went for it. 00:29:50 A: Yeah. Stories are everything and it helps people really understand and realize that they can aspire to do what you do. Because you might, whatever your path was. I got divorced, single mom, spent all my money moving back to California because my family wanted to be there, be here. I had to go on food stamps until I found a new job. So we all have our ups and downs, but by sharing our stories, we help give hope to other people and inspiration. So whatever your story is, you have a message that other people need to hear. 00:30:25 Melissa: 100%. So on that wonderful note and I would say I resonate deeply with that idea as far as personally not having grown up with a lot of resources. What I will say to just add a little bit to that is that that tends to make you even more resourceful. Just saying, right? Like if you grew up if you're listening to this and you're like, yeah I was not surrounded by millionaires and billionaires. 00:30:54 Melissa: But I'm trying to do something big in my life right now as a mom, the leader of my family. That's like a gift that keeps on giving that I don't think is heard often enough. And it applies if you're trying to launch your own podcast. Like there's definitely inventive, imaginative ways to set yourself up and find that quiet cornering your house or find the guests that you want to bring on your podcast. 00: 31:26 Melissa: So, Anika, how can anyone who is hearing you, anyone who's at least intrigued by the Playgirl story, might I add, reach out to you? Because yeah, that was pretty cool. 00:31:40 A: Thank you. Honestly, and I hate I'm going to be that person that I'm like, here's this way to reach out to me and this way. My website, yourbrandamplified.com is the easiest way. I do have a link for coaching, but I need to add in the form for people being interested in the podcast program. So I'll make sure that that gets up before this is released. And my email is anika@yourbrand amplified.com. Super easy. 00:32:09 A: Always happy to speak to anybody to help you walk through whether it is being a mother, single mother, trying to find your next step, or you're launching a podcast or want to or PR, marketing, brand strategy, digital media, any of those areas, I'm always happy to just have a conversation because that's what, again, that's where we connect and this is what we need in the world. And so I really appreciate being on your platform today. 00:32:36 Melissa: Thank you so much. And if anyone is listening, just look at your device and look in the little show notes and you'll see all these links. It'll be so, so easy. But thank you so much for this conversation. And I would love the day when you have a 50-50 of podcast hosts, like 50% men, 50% women as an example, or anything in terms of what's out there. And I mean, I just think it takes bravery, but I think the right messages need that oomph. They need that lift. And so may they be amplified, right? Thank you, Anika. 00:33:13 A: Thank you. 00:33:14 Melissa: Okay, I'm so grateful for you sticking through and listening to the conversation with Anika and myself. And I hope that you were able to put into action some of her key ideas. What does that mean? So for example, this idea of having a lack of confidence around your voice, it really doesn't matter. We actually want to hear your unique story. It can help someone else. 00:33:35 Melissa: Second point, when it comes to technology, it is something that you can so Google and honestly, it's not make or break. It's something that at the beginning, you might want to just explore what works for you from a budget perspective, and then ultimately graduate to the more sophisticated tools and solutions. What I will do is put in the show notes a link to my recommendations in terms of my technology uses, okay? So go ahead to the show notes and you will see that for free. 00:34:01 Melissa: Then the third point that I want to just mention here is the following. Chances are that one time or that story that you're kind of embarrassed to tell, but really shaped who you are is the one that you should lead with on your podcast. For me, I mean, I spoke with Anika months now and honestly, that Playgirl moment is what stuck out in my head. She could have mentioned the most glorious experiences that she has had as a part-time faculty member at USC. But that's what stood out for me. 00:34:32 Melissa: And I promise you, chances are, if there's something quirky in your history or background, that might be something that you can feel encouraged about sharing. So here's what I would love, love, love to know. Please grab the action planner and tracker, first of all. Second of all, reach out to me. I am very accessible. If you got this in your email, definitely just hit reply. Let me know how they served you. 00:34:59 Melissa: Otherwise, share this with one mom. This makes for a perfect holiday present. She will get a chuckle out of it and a lot of value, especially if she is looking to launch her own podcast. Until next Tuesday. Happy, happy holidays.
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261: I See You, Santa: The Unsung Holiday Hero (Share With A Holiday Stressed Mom)
In this heartfelt podcast, a mom (Melissa Llarena your host and mom of three) shares the raw, beautiful reality of holiday preparation. From a hilarious Target shopping adventure with her three sons to a powerful love letter recognizing the invisible labor of mothers during the holiday season, this episode is a must-listen for every mom navigating the magic and chaos of Christmas. Key Highlights: &]:mt-2 list-disc space-y-2 pl-8"> A unique approach to gift-giving after revealing the truth about Santa Comedic tale of shopping with three sons and avoiding potential "holiday shoplifting" Intimate look at the emotional and logistical challenges of motherhood during the holidays What You'll Hear: &]:mt-2 list-disc space-y-2 pl-8"> The story behind teaching kids about thoughtful gift-giving A moving tribute to moms who create Christmas magic Raw, honest moments of holiday preparation and emotional complexity Memorable Quotes: &]:mt-2 list-disc space-y-2 pl-8"> "Jail time for the holidays is not on my Santa wish list" "We can all use some encouragement" "Dear Santa, you are the magic during Christmas" Call to Action: Share this episode with a mom who needs to feel seen and appreciated this holiday season. 🚨This episode is brought to you by Fertile Imagination: A Guide for Stretching Every Mom's Superpower for Maximum Impact This holiday season purchase a copy or two of Fertile Imagination, email me a picture of your copy of Fertile Imagination (under the tree by the candles) using this email address melissa [at ]melissallarena.com , and then on Christmas day I hope to share these images across my social media. Let's support the moms we are and love this holiday season! Shop Fertile Imagination for the holidays! – https://bit.ly/fertilebook About Fertile Imagination You can be a great mom without giving up, shrinking, or hiding your dreams. There's flexibility in how you pursue anything – your role, your lifestyle, and your personal and professional goals. The limitations on your dreams are waiting to be shattered. It's time to see and seize what's beyond your gaze. Let's bridge your childhood daydreams with your grown-up realities. Imagine skipping with your kids along any path – you, surpassing your milestones while your kids are reaching theirs. There's only one superpower versatile enough to stretch your thinking beyond what's been done before: a Fertile Imagination. It's like kryptonite for impostor syndrome and feeling stuck when it's alert! In Fertile Imagination, you will awaken your sleeping source of creative solutions. If you can wake up a toddler or a groggy middle schooler, then together with the stories in this book – featuring 25 guests from my podcast Unimaginable Wellness, proven tools, and personal anecdotes – we will wake up your former playmate: your imagination! Advance Praise "You'll find reality-based strategies for imagining your own imperfect, fulfilling life in this book!" —MARTHA HENNESSEY, former NH State Senator "Melissa invites the reader into a personal and deep journey about topics that are crucially important to uncover what would make a mom (and dad too) truly happy to work on…even after the kids are in bed." —KEN HONDA, best-selling author of Happy Money "This book is a great purchase for moms in every stage of life. Melissa is like a great friend, honest and wise and funny, telling you about her life and asking you to reflect on yours." —MAUREEN TURNER CAREY, librarian in Austin, TX Where can you find Melissa Llarena? https://www.linkedin.com/in/melissallarena/ Transcript Around Thanksgiving, I took my three sons to Target with a unique mission: help them pick out gifts for each other. When we'd revealed Santa wasn't real, I proposed a new tradition. "Buy a gift for your brother," I told them, "Think of it like knowing someone has your back." My youngest brought a Nordstrom bag to hide gifts in the basket. My middle child, a Trader Joe's bag. My eldest? Nothing. Just determination. I stood by the cashier, watching them navigate this new territory. What I didn't anticipate was how suspicious they would look - like they were potentially shoplifting in the same aisle, taking turns, eyeing each other's selections. Realizing this could go sideways quickly, I alerted a store worker. "Jail time for the holidays is not on my Santa wish list," I thought to myself. One by one, they bought gifts. One by one, I watched $50 after $50 go to Nintendo. The young cashier - on his first day - had to create separate transactions for each item, hiding them like you'd discreetly handle a maxipad purchase. It's December 17th now. Like you, I've been operating on full steam ahead mode. Ensuring everything arrives on time. Making sure nothing gets discovered. Keeping the house from falling apart - or at least fixing what breaks before the holiday buzz begins. My business and conversations with moms everywhere have made me realize: we can all use some encouragement. I'm not a runner, but I imagine these last school days feel completely out of control. So here's my hope - that you feel a bit of a lift. Here's a letter. To you. To us. Dear Santa, I see you. I see you trying to make this hectic week work. Juggling a million tasks, moving through chaos with purpose. I see you doing the laundry, pre-packing for the holiday trip - meticulously checking what you have, what's missing, calculating what you still need to buy. I see you helping out for the school holiday play. Gathering cardboard, duct taping backings to make designs stand up, secretly hoping nothing falls on your precious children's creation. I see you crying in your car. Thinking about the family you'll see this year, wondering if this might be the last time - yet putting on your brave face to get through the visit. I see you hoping your Christmas cards reach everyone on time. So many people have moved, and keeping up has gotten harder and harder through the years. I see you updating your spreadsheet. Tracking the guest list, planning foods you'll order or make, asking for help, making sure you remember everyone's food restrictions and requirements. I see you frustrated. A leak in the garage you now have to fix. Your dryer blew out - all during this crazy, busy week. I see you trying to remember: PJ day, the winter party, a concert band - all on the same day, for kids at different schools. I see you waiting in long lines alongside other moms, searching for organic lollipops or stumble guys figurines to put into the precise stockings that keep falling off your fireplace mantel. Dear Santa, I see you trying to figure out when you'll get your hair done, or when you'll finally have a moment to breathe. I see that you added this to do on your list and yet you first need to do so many other things that you just might skip what makes you feel good…. Dear Santa, you are the magic during Christmas. I see you keeping your magic hidden with your little ones, and navigating a less magical Christmas with your older children. Dear Santa, my hope for you is that you get what you wish for - and never have to clean it, dust it, or find a way to maintain it. May it all work out. May you feel loved. May you feel magic too. My call to action is simple: Send this to a mom who is out there, busily navigating the logistics of being Santa for her family. Give her the gift of recognition. And may you feel its presence too.
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260: Finding Balance as a Mom Founder: Leah Remillet's Secrets to Sustainable Success and 100-Day Sabbatical
Ready for a fresh episode that's brimming with big dreams, family stories, and some real-life hacks to build a better business without burning out? This week, we're chatting with Leah Remillet, a mom, entrepreneur, and systems whiz who shares her journey from hustling 24/7 to finding that sweet spot of success and balance. Leah breaks down how she took a 100-day break (yes, you read that right!) and still came back to a thriving business, totally inspired. Plus, if you've ever had genius ideas pop up while you're in the shower or driving, Leah's got tips on capturing those "aha!" moments without missing a beat. So, grab a cozy seat or hit play on your next drive – we're diving into all things systems, sabbaticals, and sustainable success! In this episode, you will hear: Allowing yourself space to step back can reignite passion and motivation. Transitioning from a "hustle harder" mindset to finding balance by setting boundaries and systems. Nurturing creativity without the interference of day-to-day tasks. Shifting focus to small, everyday positives can improve both business and personal well-being. How small tools like shower notepads and car voice memos are great for capturing fleeting creative thoughts. Capturing inspiration right away helps turn ideas into actionable steps. 🚨This episode is brought to you by Fertile Imagination: A Guide for Stretching Every Mom's Superpower for Maximum Impact This holiday season purchase a copy or two of Fertile Imagination, email me a picture of your copy of Fertile Imagination (under the tree by the candles) using this email address melissa [at ]melissallarena.com , and then on Christmas day I hope to share these images across my social media. Let's support the moms we are and love this holiday season! Shop Fertile Imagination for the holidays! – https://bit.ly/fertilebook __________________________________________________________________________________ About Leah Remillet Leah Remillet is the host of The Balancing Busy Podcast, an international speaker, and the balance strategist. Leah helps women do less but better. Simply put, if you're a woman with a mission, but you worry that scaling your business means failing at home, then Leah can show you how to spread your message, make an incredible income and do it all in less time! International speaker, podcast host, and systems strategist for time-starved entrepreneurs. Leah has helped thousands of small business owners ditch the overwhelm and start scaling - without sacrificing their home life, health or happiness. Quotes, that can change your perspective: "I have a notepad in the shower because I'm finally alone, creative juices are flowing, I'm always getting ideas. I can't tell you how many times some new offer concepts, some new experience has been completely flushed out in the shower and I'm writing it on that notepad." - Leah Remillet "Having those systems and just implementing them and putting it in place has saved me because it saves tons and tons of hours. And I'm all about making it as simple as possible to create those systems. So a lot of times I just set up my systems in real time as I'm doing a task." - Leah Remillet "Growth time is my time to brainstorm or to watch that training that I've been really curious about or to study some email sequence that I saw somebody do that I thought was really good. Whatever I want to do, that time is there and available to me to just really use my creativity. So that is one very simple way that I actually make sure because one of the problems is when we probably are doing a lot of learning." - Leah Remillet "Pivoting is a natural part of business and it's imperative if we're going to stay successful and if we're not going to fade into the oblivion, right? So pivoting is going to be part of our businesses. Plus we learn more, we grow more, our passions change." - Leah Remillet SHARE this episode and tag a fellow entrepreneur or parent who could use a dose of inspiration and a few tips on finding that elusive work-life harmony. Whether you're scaling your business, juggling family life, or just dreaming of a little more freedom, Leah's story is proof that it's possible to do it all without burning out. Supporting Resources: Website: https://balancingbusy.com/ Instagram: @leahremillet Sabbatical for the summer or the holidays for that matter? When things have felt the best has been when I've been most intentional. Finding simple systems for everything! Go to the gym or spark my creativity or how to pivot and yet have a system or how to capture your ideas in the shower....or on where to double-down......seeking results.... Go to this link to see what a system looks like: Gift.balancingbusy.com Balance is a feeling Subscribe and Review Have you subscribed to my podcast for new moms who are entrepreneurs, founders, and creators? I'd love for you to subscribe if you haven't yet. I'd love it even more if you could drop a review or 5-star rating over on Apple Podcasts. Simply select "Ratings and Reviews" and "Write a Review" then a quick line with your favorite part of the episode. It only takes a second and it helps spread the word about the podcast for writer moms. This holiday season purchase a copy or two of Fertile Imagination, email me your picture (under the tree by the candles) using this email address melissa [at ]melissallarena.com , and then on Christmas day I hope to share these images across my social media. Let's support the moms we are and love this holiday season! Shop Fertile Imagination for the holidays! – https://bit.ly/fertilebook About Fertile Imagination You can be a great mom without giving up, shrinking, or hiding your dreams. There's flexibility in how you pursue anything – your role, your lifestyle, and your personal and professional goals. The limitations on your dreams are waiting to be shattered. It's time to see and seize what's beyond your gaze. Let's bridge your childhood daydreams with your grown-up realities. Imagine skipping with your kids along any path – you, surpassing your milestones while your kids are reaching theirs. There's only one superpower versatile enough to stretch your thinking beyond what's been done before: a Fertile Imagination. It's like kryptonite for impostor syndrome and feeling stuck when it's alert! In Fertile Imagination, you will awaken your sleeping source of creative solutions. If you can wake up a toddler or a groggy middle schooler, then together with the stories in this book – featuring 25 guests from my podcast Unimaginable Wellness, proven tools, and personal anecdotes – we will wake up your former playmate: your imagination! Advance Praise "You'll find reality-based strategies for imagining your own imperfect, fulfilling life in this book!" —MARTHA HENNESSEY, former NH State Senator "Melissa invites the reader into a personal and deep journey about topics that are crucially important to uncover what would make a mom (and dad too) truly happy to work on…even after the kids are in bed." —KEN HONDA, best-selling author of Happy Money "This book is a great purchase for moms in every stage of life. Melissa is like a great friend, honest and wise and funny, telling you about her life and asking you to reflect on yours." —MAUREEN TURNER CAREY, librarian in Austin, TX TRANSCRIPT 00:00:00 Leah: I have a notepad in the shower. You can buy it on Amazon. I think it's called, like No More Ideas Down The Drain maybe, but if you literally just put in Shower Notepad on Amazon, it'll come up. There is a notepad in the shower because I'm finally alone, creative juices are flowing, I'm always getting ideas. I can't tell you how many times some new offer concepts, some new experience has, like, been completely flushed out in the shower and I'm writing it on that notepad. 00:00:00 Melissa: Welcome to the Mom Founder Imagination Hub, your weekly podcast to inspire you to dream bigger. Plan out how you're going to get to that next level in business. Find the energy to keep going and make sure your creative juices are flowing so that this way you get what you really want rather than having to settle. Get ready to discover how mom founders have reimagined entrepreneurship and motherhood. 00:00:52 Melissa: Ever wonder how they do it? Tune in to find out. And stretch yourself by also learning from diverse entrepreneurs who might not be moms, but who have lessons you can tailor about how you can disrupt industries and step way outside of your comfort zone. I believe every mom's superpower is her imagination. In this podcast, I'm gonna give you the mindset, methods, and tools to unleash yours. Sounds good? Then keep listening. 00:01:23 Melissa: Leah, I am thrilled to have you on the Mom Founder Imagination Hub. How are you today? 00:01:30 Leah: I am excellent and happy to be here. Thanks for having me. 00:01:33 Melissa: You are so welcome. I am so excited to have a conversation with someone that's like a OG in the online, her own business is a mom space. I feel like I am OG'd out right now. And I feel like you haven't come back from your 100 days of sabbatical are like what I need right now and listeners who have been at it for some time. So there's an intro for you. I need to know everything. I mean, like, what was it like to just, you know, be in the ocean watching, is it your son, like surfing the waves and stuff, and like not having to be out and about online? Like, what was that like? Help us all feel that freedom. 00:02:22 Leah: You got it. Okay, so I'm Leah Remillet and I am a business and success strategist, and where I love to focus is helping women entrepreneurs do less with better results. So that's what I'm, that, that's what it gets down to of what I do. And I've been in business for 16 years. So that is raising babies and a business simultaneously for a long, long time. My kids were not even in elementary school yet. They were like four, three and newborn when I started a business. 00:02:54 Leah: And, you know, I have worked hard. I've gone through all kinds of phases, you know, times where I was… are sole provider for several, several years, times where I was part, you know, half and half provider. I mean, I've just, I've experienced it all. And I have never let myself take an extended break. I mean, I've gotten on vacation, like, don't get me wrong. Like I've gone on vacation for, you know, 10 days or something like that. But even that, you know, it's just a little bit hard to be fully unplugged. And I feel like I'm actually pretty decent at that. I unplug on the weekends entirely. I absolutely have fully unplugged on a vacation, but nothing like this. 00:03:35 Leah: So I started playing with this idea at the beginning of the summer of, like what if I just took the whole summer off? I was having a really hard time convincing myself that that was acceptable. All of the fears were coming in, right? Like ideas, like I'm gonna lose all my momentum. I'm gonna lose my rankings. I'm gonna lose, you know, just all of the things. I have my own podcast, Balancing Busy Podcast that you're going to be on. And, you know, there's just, there's all these fears, right? And so I kept just mulling the idea around without actually committing. And then one day I've, you know, been thinking about it for weeks now and I'm thinking about it. I'm sitting down. 00:04:14 Leah: And I just thought, well, if I email my podcast producer, then it's just done. And so it actually stayed for a few days. The original draft sounded something like, maybe sorta I'm thinking we could possibly, and then by the time I finally sent it, it was, this is what we're doing. We are doing this. And so I sent the email, and the second that I sent it, I felt giddy. Like I was, like so excited, right? 00:04:44 Leah: And I started out giving myself like, oh, I mean, maybe I'll do it all summer, but maybe I'll just do it, two months. Maybe it'll just be one month. I can decide, I can figure it out. Turns out I loved the break and I fully embraced it for over a hundred days where, I mean, there was a couple of things I had to do. I would say I maybe worked, maybe two hours a week, some weeks never at all, but maybe about that. 00:05:09 Leah: But yeah, I was checked out and it was incredible. I happened to, our… Well, so two things, big that were happening during our life over this summer is number one, our middle was heading off to college. So I got to spend all this time with her and just like soak up every moment I could be so intentional as we, you know, just enjoyed the summer together and then prepared to send her off to university. 00:05:35 Leah: And then our youngest who's 16 years old, he is in the world of Competitive Wake Surfing. So this is actually not surfing on an ocean. It's actually surfing behind a boat, which is different. And he started competing this last year and he made it to the world championships, which were in Geneva. And so we just got back from there a couple of weeks ago. 00:05:59 Leah: And so I took the entire summer off, really up until getting back from Switzerland and then got back to work. And it's been incredible. A, the break was incredible and I can kind of share about that. But also coming back, I am so inspired, excited. I like that fire is back, which feels so amazing. 00:06:21 Melissa: Oh, my God. So everyone tells me this, but I'm so hesitant. They're just like, Melissa, you have to step away in order to like find it back, right, to get that mojo back. And I'm like, no, no, you know, got to be hardcore. Keep going. So I saw this post, which was like, totally like, oh my goodness, is this serious right now? 00:06:40 Melissa: This person said, and I don't know if it's true, she has a podcast and she's like, oh yeah, I paused my podcast for a year and I retained my status or whatever in Listen Notes. And I thought to myself, what? I know, I know, right? We gotta be mindful of what we read online. But I just thought to myself, I was like, okay, so here I am trying to figure out what to say every single week. 00:07:02 Melissa: And here's someone who was like, totally dead to the world for a year and like, retained her spot. Okay. So whether that's true or not, that's for another day. So then here's the question. Okay. So there you are. You're in Geneva, which I love. I love, I have such stories about Lake Geneva. You're in Geneva, maybe you're having that fondue and all that good stuff. 00:07:23 Leah: Oh yes. 00:07:24 Melissa: And you're enjoying life. You're enjoying life. And also like this very specific stage in terms of like your family, your two kids. Right. So let me ask you this question. It just popped up earlier. So I think about growth spurts, right. And our kids. And then I think about the same growth spurts maybe in our businesses, right? I just wonder, like for you, did you ever notice that there was a particular stage maybe when your kids were doing, like, super well and your business was doing really well? And like what mind space were you in? Because I want that. 00:07:54 Leah: Absolutely. Okay, so first thing I'll say is just to answer that, you know, that Listen Notes that I'll say, I saw my office, but that out there three months of no podcast episodes at all. I did see mine drop barely, but I think it's going to come up really fast. I got how many downloads like back there and above, probably because I've been, everybody wants to know the story and all those things. So there's a little on, you know, just a little glimpse on that. 00:08:20 Leah: I think of times in my business where it's been especially great. It's always been around when I have been very, very intentional with trying to have both things feel great. And I'm using that word feel, because that's really what balance is, is, it's a feeling, right? Like we feel, like everything in its alignment, everything feels good, everything is some forward motion. 00:08:50 Leah: And I think about early, the first couple of years didn't feel so good. I'm feeling like, I'm like, I was in that hustle harder mentality where you just keep trying to figure out what else you can give up to work harder in your business. And I'm also the primary caregiver for our three kids who are all super young while my husband's in graduate school, right? And I mean, it didn't feel good. 00:09:19 Leah: And then I really decided to make some changes. I knew I couldn't sustain what I was doing. I knew I had to find a better way and I got really determined. And I was making great money, like I had hit the six figure mark at that point in those first couple of years, but it was, like at what expense? 00:09:38 Leah: And so I made this decision that I was either going to find a better way or I would walk away from my business, which was scary because I'm the one who paid the mortgage. So it was like, well, I really hope I can figure this out. And I did. And as I figured that out, then I really had this explosion of just growth in all areas. My business continued to grow and make more money, even though my hours were going down. 00:10:03 Leah: Things felt great with my kids. I volunteered in each of their classrooms every single week. Like all the things were there and it just felt so good. And the truth is, is, that life is this ever flowing thing, right? So things go great and then something shows up unexpected and things get a little bit harder for a while, and then you work to bring things to grade and there's this ebb and flow that happens. 00:10:28 Leah: But if I had to get down to when things have been at their best, what is the common denominator? I guess I would say it's two things. One, being very intentional. Intentional with my time, intentional with my energy, and intentional in my most important relationships. And I'll even put my business in there as one of my relationships, we could say, right? 00:10:50 Leah: Like very intentional with my time with my kids, with my time with my husband, making sure that we have weekly date night and that we get away once a quarter for a night away and that we get away once a week for just, you know, just us a year and then making sure that we're having lots of great family quality time, one-on-one time with my kids, and in addition, time for my business. 00:11:12 Leah: Now that might sound like how in the credit do you fit all that in? And that comes down to systems. I am very obsessed with systems. I am constantly looking for how could I automate this, how could I batch this, how could I implement a simple system for this so that I don't have to keep redoing it myself over and over? So those would be some of the things that I did. And then the other thing that I would say is keeping a very strong practice of gratitude, just looking for the good everywhere, writing it down, focusing on it. But that combination every time is when I'm doing my absolute best. 00:11:48 Melissa: Yeah, I would say, you know, the thing that really popped up for me was this idea. So I start out as an example with the system, and then I want to pivot. And so I'm just like, really, you know, kind of not as enthused, right? Cause you work very hard upfront to set up these systems. And the assumption is that your, the intention for your business, well, I don't know. For me, it started out with this one thing. This was in 2011. My whole thing was this, okay, I just had a baby. I started my business with my firstborn on my chest. He, like, did a diaper blowout on my first client, basically. 00:12:26 Melissa: And then I've had two more kids since, but I started out my business because I was like, you know what? I want to keep my tip toe. That was the idea, tip toe in the world of commerce. So I was a coach to marketing executives, but then I had one set of systems for that target audience, right. And then, okay, it's been a long time, but I wrote a book for imagination. And when I wrote the book, my intention was to pivot, talk to moms that are working moms and have their own businesses. 00:12:51 Melissa: And so now the old system, sure, I could copy and paste, edit and update, but because of the cluttered market, the competition right now, I don't have much confidence in systems. So how can you help someone like me and listeners, right? There's a lot of people that they're like, man, it takes a lot of effort to put together a system, you know? So how do I know that it's going to be worthwhile if I myself tend to change my mind or decide that I want to pivot because the market is not favorable for whatever reason. 00:13:25 Leah: Absolutely, I love this question. Pivoting is a natural part of business and it's imperative if we're going to stay successful and if we're not going to fade into the oblivion, right? So pivoting is going to be part of our businesses. Plus we learn more, we grow more, our passions change. And so it's a natural course that there's a good chance that we are going to eventually pivot into something completely different. 00:13:50 Leah: I have pivoted multiple times, right? So my very first business was a photography business. I love to joke that I feel like it's the gateway business for like, stay at home moms, and then I got into this creation. I built that business very fast. I just inherently get the business side of things. And so I was like, I need to teach other photographers how to build a six figure photography business like I have. 00:14:14 Leah: And so I created this course that was back in 2010. I did that for years. I taught mastermind retreats. I spoke at tons of conventions and conferences. Then in about 2015, I wanted to do this major pivot where I realized I actually want to help all kinds of entrepreneurial women. Because at this point, I've had a brick and mortar. I've had a location-based business. I've had an online business. I've taught and spoke and had events and retreats. 00:14:41 Leah: Like I've done so many different things. I've gotten each one of those to be wildly successful, and I want to show all kinds of entrepreneurial women, especially my heart is to moms, and show them how to do less but better and get those results, right? So then it shifts again. I have this major shift. And then after my sabbatical, I don't know that it's really a shift. It's still helping those women, but what I'm super passionate about right now is building a business without social media. 00:15:09 Leah: So, implementing everything for your reach and your visibility and being able to do it without having to count on the very, very inconsistent, unreliable social media. And so that's what I'm super excited about. So each time there's pivots, there's gonna be adjustments. So let's talk about in my mind first what I believe a system is. It is just a simple set of steps that allows you to duplicate the same results or the very best results over and over and over. 00:15:41 Leah: That's all a system is. So one of my simplest systems is that I work out every morning. I don't particularly love exercise. I don't know that I'll ever learn to love exercise, but I do it because I'm supposed to. Right? And so I have a simple system in place, which is that every night before bed, I make sure that my water bottles, filled, that all my workout clothes are out, including the rubber band on the very top. Because if I can't find a rubber band, I can convince myself I can't do the workout that day. 00:16:10 Leah: And they're all just sitting there, right? Like the simplest little system, but it allows me to be successful. Now in our businesses, we're just constantly looking for, where is there something that I have to do all the time? That I'm duplicating all the time? And is there a set of steps I can put in to number one, create a better experience for my customers and myself and my team, and number two, to simplify it for myself. So I don't have to sit there and think through, what am I going to do next, right? 00:16:39 Leah: And so having those systems and just implementing them and putting, in place has saved me because it saves tons and tons of hours. And I'm all about making it as simple as possible to create those systems. So a lot of times I just set up my systems in real time as I'm doing a task. Maybe I open up Loom and I literally am just recording myself doing it to make it really, really easy. 00:17:06 Leah: Or maybe I'm writing an email and I'm like, gosh, that was a really good one. And I have to send this kind of email all the time. So I open up my auto-signatures and I save it as an auto-signature. So now the next time I have to write that email, I can just drop in the auto-signature, adjust it a little bit to be for somebody else and then go on. Then, of course, there's bigger systems too, like a sales funnel or a customer experience funnel or referral funnel. Right. So there are the bigger ones for sure. 00:17:36 Leah: But even just starting wherever we can to get those little wins, to get a little bit of time back, that's huge. And then I'll say this, for anyone who's visual like me and you're like, if I could just see this, that would really, really help. They can get a little sneak peek into a couple of my systems and see the behind the scenes. And all they have to do is go to gift, G-I-F-T dot balancingbusy dot com and they can access a few of my systems and just literally see some of the more medium sized ones. I shared some really tiny ones, but some more medium sized ones to really see what it looks like. 00:18:12 Melissa: I love that. And I think, you know, it's so funny because you say the word system, and then I think to myself, how can we systematize expansive thinking or the use of our imagination? So let's go there to kind of like, you know, take the conversation to the place where I guess it's like, Willy Wonka style, right? So thinking creatively, divergent thinking, coming up with fresh ideas, now having come from your 100-day sabbatical. How have you maybe systematized the act of coming up with great ideas or that creative flow in your business as a business owner or as a mom? 00:18:51 Leah: So this is going to be, again, one of those very simple systems, but I have it scheduled, in every single week, growth time. Growth time is my time to brainstorm or to watch that training that I've been really curious about or to study some email sequence that I saw somebody do that I thought was really good. Whatever I want to do, that time is there and available to me to just really use my creativity. 00:19:23 Leah: So that is one very simple way that I actually make sure because one of the [problems is], when we don't have enough clients, we probably are doing a lot of learning. We're doing a lot of research and studying. So our creative juices are really flowing because we're seeing ideas, it's sparking new ideas. But then when someone gets busy, you don't have time to do all that research, to do all that looking, right? Like those things go away, and then we're surprised that our creativity seems to feel stifled. 00:19:52 Leah: The easiest way to fix this is to just schedule in a reoccurring date with yourself, that is time to get to learn, grow, be creative, brainstorm, try new things, adjust things, whatever you wanna do with that time. So that would be the first thing that I would suggest. The second thing I would suggest is having a place or multiple places where when an idea does come, it's easy to get it jotted down. 00:20:20 Leah: So two very funny odd places that I document my creativity is, I have a notepad in the shower. You can buy it on Amazon. I think it's called, like No More Ideas Down The Drain maybe. But if you literally just put in Shower Notepad on Amazon, it'll come up. There is a notepad in the shower because I'm finally alone, creative juices are flowing. I'm always getting ideas. I can't tell you how many times some new offer concepts, some new experience has, like, been completely flushed out in the shower and I'm writing it on that notepad. 00:20:55 Leah: The other time that I have a tendency to feel more creative is when I'm driving. Why? Because again, I'm not distracted. I'm locked in my car. I don't, I like silence. So a lot of times I'm just sitting with my thoughts and I'll start getting some ideas. So I turn on, voice memo and I just start recording an entire voice memo of all the thoughts I'm thinking. 00:21:16 Leah: And then I text it to myself so that I can then review with all of those ideas in that scheduled time that I have allotted every single week. So there's some really simple systems to put in place to help, make sure that that creativity that there's time for it. 00:21:32 Melissa: So I love this because first of all, like in the shower waterproof, like I'm just like, okay, yeah, that's a purchase. 00:21:39 Leah: It's seriously epic. I love it. 00:21:41 Melissa: Like who thought of that, right? And it was probably thought of in a shower, but you know, I digress. So that's amazing. So, okay. So just to kind of close the conversation. So here you are after those 100 days, you have this idea in terms of supporting, you know, entrepreneurs, you know, growing their business without social media, right? So like, what is the system that you have in place now to get this idea that is inspiring to you out into the world? Like, do you have a system for that? Like, okay, idea to reality? 00:22:15 Leah: I actually do, absolutely. And so yeah, I'll share with you kind of what this is looking like. So I really started flushing out and brainstorming, looking at all my analytics, looking at all my revenue streams, all these different things and being like, where do the clients come from? Where is it all really coming from? 00:22:33 Leah: And the honest truth is, it's not social media. It never has been. I mean, yes, don't get me wrong. I have absolutely gotten sales off social media, of course, right? But I love tracking things. And when I really look at everything, I know where the bulk of our email traffic come, or not email, website traffic comes from, and it's never even remotely social media, never. 00:22:56 Leah: And I know where my big clients have come from and right, so I really started looking at all this and then flushing out and building out. Well how can I help another business owner do all of these things? And a lot of it, I've already, have in the past but like how could I make it very actionable, easy to implement and not overwhelming, and so I'm flushing it all out but then I came to a realization. 00:23:18 Leah: Here's the truth. One of the biggest things that I'm a believer in is Pinterest as a marketing strategy. I look at Pinterest as a search engine, not a social media platform. And it is where 97% of my traffic has been coming from directly to my website for years. I mean, I think we're on a solid eight years. And so it's like, oh my gosh, like, I kept spending more time on reels if I'm being totally honest, because that's where everybody says we should be instead of doubling down on this thing that has clearly worked for so, so long. 00:23:50 Leah: So I obviously in my own business, am doubling down. I have my systems in place for making sure that we're really prioritizing our Pinterest, and then I also wanna figure out how to teach it to others. But I came to this realization, I've had Pinterest in place in my business for I don't know how long, but it is definitely over eight years. I'm a little rusty, right? I haven't set up Pinterest in a very, very long time. I mean, it's all automated and pretty, it just flows now. So I thought, okay, I want to help. 00:24:20 Leah: Business owners do this where I literally get my hands dirty and I'm gonna implement it all for them, which is not something I would normally offer because that's very, very time consuming. But in order to build the DIY version where I can walk entrepreneurs through, here is exactly how to do it. I wanted to make sure that I was in it and I knew all the most recent information. 00:24:39 Leah: So I decided, okay, this is gonna be the system. The system is I will take a maximum of three entrepreneurs who I will implement it all for them. We're gonna build it out together. I'm gonna figure out their business plan and strategy, their ideal customer, all the things. I'm gonna help write out all the copy and I'm gonna implement it into their businesses while simultaneously building out all the processes so that I can build this more affordable version where people can just do it themselves. 00:25:10 Leah: And so that is the system that I created for myself. So now it was really amazing. We filled the spots in 48 hours. And so I have the clients that I'm working with where I am helping them implement everything into their businesses, simultaneously documenting, getting it all set up to be able to show someone and then that'll become the membership. 00:25:33 Leah: So that's the system that I created for being able to actually make this big pivot, or at least the original one. There's gonna be a lot more systems that I start placing in between and throughout everything, but that's kind of the big one of how I'm taking this big idea and actually making it manageable. And that was a reason why I was very, very careful to say, I'm not gonna take more than three. 00:25:56 Leah: And actually I decided to stop at two because I got the two in the first 48 hours and I was like, okay, I can get that third. Or I can just say, I'm still very, everything I'm about is balancing our home life and our businesses. And I just thought, I know I can keep everything in balance if I have two customers, two of these mastermind clients, plus I'm building the system and everything else. I don't know for sure that I can do it if I have three plus. 00:26:25 Leah: So I just said, okay, I'm capping it too. I'm excited, I'm gonna work with these two businesses. I love what each of them stand for. I cannot wait to help them grow and then I'm going to build the program simultaneously. So that's kind of a real life version of me making these things happen right now. 00:26:44 Melissa: I love that. And I think, you know, anyone that's listening, I guess, like there's so many lessons here, but one big lesson is that it's about making one decision and then just being comfortable and trusting yourself to then make the next decision. And it might be like the opposite from the first, right? 00:27:01 Leah: Yeah. 00:27:02 Melissa: And it's like, I mean, we've been in this space for so long at this point that it's kind of like, I mean, I don't have whiplash yet, but you know, kind of on that at that point. But you know, whatever idea you have right now, like it's good enough as is right now to just start getting your feet wet, you know, in the market. And then I think just the other idea is, you know, systematizing creativity. I know for a lot of people that have MBAs like myself and maybe some listeners, we're just like, kind of out of it. 00:27:32 Melissa: But, I love hearing it from your perspective, Leah, because it's more entrepreneurial. It's more like rolling up your sleeves and just like, okay, just document what you do. You know what I mean? You simplified it for us. And then the other idea is just the whole like stepping away. Like, you know, the world is not gonna implode technically. So give it a go. If you've been at one business challenge for a long time, especially. So where can listeners learn more about you and your systems? I know you shared a little URL earlier, but where can we learn more about you and follow you? 00:28:07 Leah: Absolutely. Okay. So they're already on their podcast platform getting to listen to your amazing episode. So my suggestion would be to go search Balancing Busy and follow my podcast and you'll hear more stories and examples and ideas all around time management, productivity, doing less but better. Just, but in all areas. So yes, of course in our businesses, but I also love focusing on the family life and all of those places too. And then of course they can go to balancingbusy.com. And if they want to see my systems, they can go to gift.balancingbusy.com 00:28:43 Melissa: Thank you so much.
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259: Unleashing Mom's Superpower: Ignite Dreams Beyond Your Success Ceiling in 2025
Reflecting on Success: How to Dream Bigger with Fertile Imagination In episode 259 of the Mom Founder Imagination Hub, host Melissa Llarena reflects on personal growth, sharing a powerful quote by former pro volleyball player Gabby Reece: 'Never let your successes be bigger than your dreams.' She draws from personal anecdotes and her book, 'Fertile Imagination: A Guide for Stretching Every Mom's Superpower for Maximum Impact,' to inspire moms to dream bigger and leverage their imagination. Shop the book this holiday season using this LINK: https://bit.ly/fertilebook Melissa reads the introduction to her book, highlighting the importance of energy, enthusiasm, and imagination in achieving greater dreams, and encourages listeners to reflect on their past successes and envision even bigger goals for 2025. 00:00 Introduction and Episode Overview 02:17 Reflecting on Success and Effort 05:47 Pursuing Bigger Dreams 09:05 Introduction to 'Fertile Imagination' 10:07 Reading the Book Introduction 15:03 Stages of Rediscovering Imagination 25:06 Final Thoughts and Encouragement Want to be a guest of the Mom Founder Imagination Hub podcast? Sign-up HERE to get on the list if you are interested in bringing your story, insights, or wisdom to the podcast. Or, use this link if you prefer (both go to the same place): https://witty-thinker-2643.kit.com/ba49a6d870 – I cannot guarantee that you'll be a guest however I do refer to this list every quarter to determine who would be a good fit. Share this episode with one female leader today who wants to dream bigger than her successes and needs to find her own way to gather the energy necessary in 2025 to do exactly this! About Melissa Llarena Melissa is a bestselling author (learn more on www.fertileideas.com), imagination coach behind the Fertile Imagination to Networking Success Group Coaching Program, consultant, speaker, contributor to ForbesWomen articles that have garnered 4 million-plus views, and the podcast host of the Mom Founder Imagination Hub. Featured guests include GaryVee, Beth Comstock, Suzy Batiz, David Meltzer, and hundreds of other unconventional thinkers. Melissa has been featured in the WSJ, Business Insider, Fox Business, CNN Money, The Huffington Post, and other publications. She holds a psychology degree from NYU, an MBA from the Tuck School of Business at Dartmouth, and a Transformational Coaching Academy certificate and is training to become a meditation practitioner. Melissa lives in Austin, Texas, with her husband and three sons (one singleton and a set of identical twins). Connect with Melissa: https://www.linkedin.com/in/melissallarena/ Supporting Resources: Email Melissa: melissa.llarena [at] gmail.com Podcast: Mom Founder Imagination Hub: https://www.melissallarena.com/podcast/ LinkedIn: https://www.linkedin.com/in/melissallarena/ Or, grab for free your copy of the "From Contact to Connection: The Mompreneur's Go-First Networking & Follow Up Playbook": https://witty-thinker-2643.ck.page/21e52edb87 Transcript Welcome to episode 259 of the mom founder imagination hub. This is your host, Melissa Lorena. So today's episode is really a reflection on a quote, a life update, and a reading of the introduction of my book, fertile imagination. I think as we draw near to the 1st of January in a month, I wanted to just kind of do a little bit of self reflection because I Do not even believe in January one goals and resolutions. Instead, I believe in making a decision today. Now this moment, even if everything doesn't seem comfy. So I was listening this weekend to a podcast by Gabby Reese, who clearly is very, very like myself. She's over six feet tall. She was a supermodel in her heyday. She's an. Athlete, volleyball pro player, you know, kind of like the opposite of who I was and who I am. I am like five feet tall, last kid to be picked at the gym for any team sport and athlete and pro is not in my vernacular, but I do like the word vernacular. So I was a bit more of a, um, cerebral entity, I guess you could say. And when I was listening to her podcast, which is really about, you know, making sure that you're optimizing for your health, when you are either a perimenopausal, menopausal, et cetera, I really grabbed onto a quote that she said, she actually says over and over in her house. And by the way, her house is not just like Gabby Reese and some random. guy and three girls. No, her house is Gabby Reese, pro volleyball player and layered Hamilton because he is an ultra surfer, extreme athlete himself. And I'm sure probably towering over Gabby Reese. So, all right, let's get to the quote that is constantly articulated in their home. Never let your successes be bigger than your dreams. When Gabby Reese shared that, I really swallowed quite hard because I thought to myself, the amount of fricking effort that I have had to put in order to make my successes Come true have been fricking extraordinary. And you probably feel the same way. If you are into success, accomplishing, having some source of significance. So in my mind, I. Immediately went to, as an example, pursuing business school. Now I was not, am not, and will never be a quant person. I'm not into like math Excel. I think if you've been around for a little bit on this podcast, you know, that I have a disdain for Microsoft Excel. Um, but you know, whatever I honor those who use it. The whole point is I think I had like five or six cavities in my business school experience because of the number of granola bars that I was chewing on in order to get through working through all of that quant work in such a competitive environment. I certainly gained weight because that's what happens when you're just Eating granola bars, but then on top of that, like it was extraordinary of the effort that I had to put forth in order to complete my degree. And I had to complete my degree. I didn't see this as a nice to have, could I stretch it, et cetera, et cetera. No, I was on a scholarship and like, I needed to fix what I had kind of created, which was this desire and need to fix Feel more fully baked and get my degree. All of that to say, I was like, Holy cow. I didn't have three kids back then. And that was a shit ton of effort. So here's Gabby Reese saying never let your successes be bigger than your dreams. Wow. I literally have my book right next to me and I'm thinking to myself, holy mother of guacamole. It took two years for me to write fertile imagination, a guide for stretching every mom's superpower for maximum impact. I would say that is my more recent success. It took two years and it's so interesting because I started it in Australia while we were there for about three and a half years and finished it here in Austin, Texas. And I will say that if getting my business school degree, um, resulted in five to six cavities, trust me, my dentist can certainly show you the receipts for that. Then getting my book definitely done as a self. Published author from the beginning to the end that actually led me to the eye doctor, physical therapist, and God knows what else I had to go through in order to fix what I had to do. Sort of created, which was some issues because I was looking at the screen for way too long at the tail end, trying to finish my book with copy editing, um, being kind of put up against the wall to figure out what needed to get done as soon as possible within a short period of time and in a very unpredictable way. So, okay. It seems to me that for me personally, I don't know about for yourself and you might want to really give this a thought, but like for you, like think about your very last success, like for real, think about the amount of effort that it took in order for you to accomplish that success. Okay. Take a big, deep breath. Now, Can you imagine something that is bigger to pursue or to become in 2025? And right now I'm recording this on December two, and I wanted to just be mindful of the fact that I get that January one is that time and we're like, Oh, all of a sudden I never was, but I can actually become this person on January two, but I want you to just. Think through your prior successes. I really want you to dig deep and really figure out for yourself, what did it take? What sacrifices did you have to make? What is it that you had to say no to in order to say yes to your self and your ambitions? And here's what I know to be true with regards to any success I have had. The unfortunate thing is that the world doesn't stop when I, all of a sudden, write down a goal. Instead, the world keeps worlding, for lack of a better word choice, and basically stuff happens in your favor and some stuff happens in a way that makes your goals harder to achieve. And the idea is you have to keep going, no matter what, whether you're in that up or you're in that down. So now as you consider the fact that your successes have to be, um, smaller than your dreams. Oh my gosh. So. Like where's this extra effort and energy going to come from? Like, that's a question I ask myself all the time because yeah, I'm a morning person this morning. I was singing from West side story. I feel pretty because I was just feeling happy today, but, but I know for a fact, when it comes down to executing on some of my ambitions, like. It's not glamorous. Like right now I was like, okay, let me create a landing page. Holy cow. Now I have to go onto this platform and relearn it because I did not have a landing page done in some time. And that is where you get some sort of resistance, right? That's where you kind of feel like, ah, crap, this dream doesn't feel so exciting anymore. Anyway. So I want to leave you with this thought. Because I want this to be brief. So my book, fertile imagination, the entire concept is about figuring out where you are going to find that energy, where you are going to get that life force, where you are going to get that spirit, that enthusiasm, that excitement to actually execute on your dreams, which as Gabby Reese said, should be bigger than your successes. And it's like, holy cow, maybe Maybe it's just these like, you know, strivers in us that kind of intimidate ourselves. But man, if I have to have more energy than I've had in the past, I feel like I myself need to reread what I wrote in my book, fertile imagination. And so I want to leave you with that. I'm going to go ahead. and read to you the introduction of my book, fertile imagination in the show notes, you can absolutely purchase your copy for yourself or a friend. Here's that link in case you're not looking at your device. It's B I T dot L Y. forward slash fertile book and you could go ahead and purchase a copy of fertile imagination right there that'll be in the show notes again it's it's a bitly link so bit. ly forward slash fertile book but right now i want to just read this to us i want to read this to us because this is a A really great starting point. If your dreams have to be bigger than your successes and you're trying to figure out how the heck you're going to get the energy, enthusiasm and motivation to execute on these dreams in 2025. So here we go. Just think about this, like reading rainbow, but you know, I'm not LeVar. So here we go. Lessons in an imagination superpower from my podcast guests and me. And this is again, just the introduction. So I do invite you to purchase the book fertile imagination. The link will be in the show notes. It's also on Amazon as well. Whoever thought mom jeans would be in style again, you know, the ones They seem to rise up to your armpits when I see them on young childless girls. I squint to see if I can imagine them looking remotely cool on me. My Puerto Rican ass would fill the entire real estate of their extra long height from crotch to above my navel area. I'm not yet convinced this will look flattering. Can I pull it off? My waist is small, especially for someone who has three kids. I'm still curious if I could make mom jeans look un mom like. I just never imagined that moms could set trends for anyone without kids. I have filled the past 11 years with a mental game to see how un mom like and sometimes un Melissa like I can design my life. I wanted to reframe what I'd seen or been told a mom should do. What about all of the other identities I had before becoming a parent? Was I relegated to burying them along with my, my placenta back in 2011? By the way, that was a powerful placenta. I had identical twins in 2013 and they were sharing one placenta. This is the thing. My so funny. I go ahead and I decided to skip my desire to not act like a mom is making for a magnificent life. It's enhanced my family's experiences and expanded what they think is possible too. As I reflect on the crazy things I've done and continue to do, I'm feeling kind of confident that perhaps I can work it in mom jeans, even if it's only in my imagination, seemingly mine has gotten quite. Fertile, a sense of wonder, access to wisdom, limitless energy, a willingness to dream and a playful spirit culminating in bursts of daily fulfillment. This book, fertile imagination is for moms who want them back. Maybe it's been a while since you felt like you were back. bursting out of your skin with hope and expectancy with your own ambitions. If this is the case, then I have great news for you. You are in the right place. This book is for moms who refuse to buy into the BS that being a mom means stomping on their personal ambitions, unless they are directly tied to the happiness of their kids. Once you relied on your dreams and big ambitions to feel alive, your dreams may have been your life. Force. Heck, your dreams may have made you bounce out of bed without an alarm clock. This book is for you. If you feel you have lost the greatest parts of your before kids life, if this is where you are today, then I want to help you transform from feeling limited by your inherited motherhood scripts, quote unquote, to being excited and thrilled by life. Imagine feeling as Jack up in a good way for yourself as you do when your least athletic kid scores a goal at soccer one glorious Saturday. You deserve to feel that wide eyed, hopeful, and tickled hot pink about the possibilities. This is the book I needed when I paired motherhood with entrepreneurship 11 years ago. I think it's been 13 now. In my case, I was so desperate to hang on. My pre mom dreams and desires that I determinedly set out to discover what I could do, even if that meant bringing my kid squarely attached to my nipple to a prospective client meeting. I'll save that story for later. I'm convinced moms may have just misplaced these things along with their house keys. Chances are you can find them by retracing your steps. The best way to achieve this is to engage an imagination, your own, the ones around you. Or your kids in new, unexpected, yet practical ways, ways that fit for us moms, whose minds are full of internal dialogue and need a spark to untangle what matters most. Since 2011, as a coach to many moms, untangling what matters most has meant helping them decipher decipher what other people expected of them and what they really wanted for themselves. Once this knot is smoothed out. It becomes possible for my clients to focus on best how best to use their distinguishable gifts for maximum impact. This clarity inspires my clients to then share their ideas with other people. As I reflected on the specific ways that worked for me, along with the key lessons I tailored into my life, I uncovered my signature method of coaching, both myself and others, my imagination to impact method, which includes three stages into which I've divided this book. You can follow them sequentially or skip ahead. Let's walk through the three stages to rediscover and fuel your imagination. Quick Pause. The reason why I wanted to read the introduction of my book right now is because when I heard Gabby Reese say that quote, never let your successes be bigger than your dreams. And I noticed the gap of like, how the heck am I going to get the energy to dream bigger than my prior successes? This is the first idea I had. I was like, you know what? I wrote about this in fertile imagination and fertile imagination itself. The book is one of my greatest successes personally, as someone who struggled with writing early on. So again, I just want to invite you to truly, truly, truly reflect on your successes, but that I want you to feel like you have a tool, your fertile imagination to help you dream Even fricking bigger in 2025. So let's get cracking. Let's get through the three stages that you need to rediscover and feel your fertile imagination, because you know what your fertile imagination is your superpower, dear mama, it absolutely is. And it's mine as well. And this is a reminder to myself too. So here we go. A fertile imagination can cast a powerful and compelling vision that will drive you to turn it into your reality, even if it's never been imagined as possible for mothers before. It produces fertile ideas whose impact can transcend generations. This superpower is versatile. It has revitalized flat out tired moms to enable them to tandem nurse twins for one year. Yeah, that was me. It has come up with unexpected strategies that have helped creative entrepreneurs bounce back, and it has helped generate visionary ideas to sustain the pace necessary to lead massive global efforts. The route to your fertile imagination can be found by First, focusing on ways to reawaken your imagination, which takes building awareness of why it's been missing or more like hibernating along with why it might not want to wake up. If fertile imagination requires a favorable environment to sprout its best ideas, you'll want to set your internal environment in particular for the greatest benefit. possible harvest. Second, once you've revived your original playdate, your fertile imagination, you will want to play with your imagination. You'll have ample opportunities to engage it, it in novel and unexpected ways to uncover what you'd like to experience more of in your life. The key is to plant several seeds in the best environment possible to see which show signs of the greatest growth. In this case, growth includes feeling positive emotions, including excitement and presence, essentially experiencing what your kids feel when they are playing. You know, what's really interesting as I'm reading this, I'm like, holy cow, this is biblical, A, B, and it's aligned with some frameworks that I am playing with right now. Anyways, I digress. The third stage is to stretch your imagination. And here's what I know to be true. So I'm kind of getting outside of this copy, but what I know to be true is that as a mom, you might feel stretched from a mental bandwidth perspective. That is not at all what I'm doing, but I am playing with that concept. When I say stretch your imagination, what I'm saying here is that kind of like silly putty. Like I want you to really stretch it out and help it almost take new shapes. And the way to do that is by sharing your ideas with other people in that way. You can absolutely reshape whatever idea you might have to make it fit. Some sort of greater purpose and really help you create a maximum impact. And this is what it takes to stretch your imagination. This takes learning how to creatively gather the support of others so that you can make the biggest possible difference with your ideas. Imagine making a bigger mark on the world than you ever thought possible. Let's go back to Gabby Reese's quote. Never let your successes be bigger than your dreams. There are seasons of motherhood. Amen, sister. You may feel as if you've fallen behind your ambitions during busy ones. This is why it's important to find ways or get tools so you can sprint toward your dreams during the steadier mom life moments. And I want you to really think that through because Right now, you know, they, they coined December, Maycember, and it's really busy right now for moms. So this might not be your moment, but maybe when the kids go back to school in 2025, maybe that is the right time. Now your fertile imagination to get back into the introduction has its best shot at impacting future generations. If you commit to experiencing all three stages to maximize your own impact. You want your kids to achieve greatness on their terms. The best path is to learn how to use your photo imagination to achieve greatness on your terms. First, want to see what that looks like within each stage to help you tap into the power of your imagination. I'm going to share some stories with you. You can expect to hear about my outrageous adventures, the result of unleashing my imagination and going for it. Some are the opposite of anyone's expectations of a mom with three school age boys. I've also included surprising stories from my podcast. I have been producing mom founder imagination hub since 2017. It's a place where I. I'm going to explore with my guests, a whole range of wellbeing topics aimed at supporting entrepreneurial moms who want to get more out of life. I have interviewed incredible people whose adventures and achievements were enabled by their chutzpah and very fertile imaginations. I'm going to tell you more about how I started my podcast as you read on, but as expected or as unexpected as it may sound, I believe. I believe us moms can learn a lot about achieving personal fulfillment and happiness from people who are not moms, not from our country of origin, outside of our socioeconomic group and completely unfamiliar with our situation. I'm never going to suggest that non moms, that non moms get a say on how you should be a mom. My intention behind including non moms is to challenge you to set aside the baggage that came with taking on your mom identity and talk about. How to go to the edges of what is possible. The idea is for you to get buck naked. It should be okay for a mom to step away from the expectations of society, culture, and conventional thinking. I want to help you have the best shot at teaching your fullest or reaching your fullest capacity on this planet. Whew, we're almost there, my beautiful listeners. Some of my personal accomplishments since becoming a mom were never on my menu of options based on what I was told. If I'm being honest, which I don't even know why I wrote that because I don't like that phrase. I've done some things that may be found on the kids menu. And that is true. You may never want to emulate some of my podcast guests and become a New York Times bestselling children's illustrator or make the Forbes list of self made female millionaires, but their stories will inspire you if you let them. I wanted to just add that a thorough imagination is a resource. You will see how others have harnessed its power. As a mom, can't you use all the resources you can get? I can. I have curated these stories because I am able to relate to them. I learned from them. And if you keep an open mind, I promise you will too. None are telling you how to mother. Instead, you will see a fuller picture of how people are finding their own way. own fulfillment and happiness in their lives. The only tool you'll need is your superpower, your fertile imagination. The permission I'm gifting you is this. Use it to propel you towards your dreams. You will uncover why as a mom, you should give yourself the permission to use a superpower. You can jump into any chapter that you might need at the moment. So I'm talking about my book and the way that it's organized and how you do not have to read it end to end. This book was written for moms who can appreciate that reading an entire book in one uninterrupted, cozy sitting is as rare as finding two 100 sheet, wide ruled, red covered composition notebooks at Walmart in New York. A week before school begins. If you're having a I can't go to the bathroom without company kind of day then just read some journal questions to get your engines going. Meditate on them even if you don't have the time to read the chapter. You can also download the imagination warm ups i. e. journal prompts right here fertileideas. com. The idea is this, just like those crystals you can buy at stores when you look at my chapters see if anyone calls to your attention. Start there. You truly can choose your own adventure. I trust that you will know what you need when you need it and be able to make this wisdom your own. However, if you're a nerd like me, then read it sequentially, meditate and journal using the questions at the end of each chapter, then take a dive in, then take a dive, implement that chapter's one key idea consistently for one week. You might be an active reader like me. Break out the highlighters and stickers make it a thing in my life The ideas in this book lifted me another mom up and they can do the same for you It's time to use your fertile imagination to really make a difference Back to the quote never let your successes be bigger than your dreams. I am so excited for whatever is going to Open up for you This upcoming year, I wanted to just have this episode to be about you, your dreams, and really reflecting on your last three greatest successes. Because guess what? That is the bar that you set for yourself, and it's time to jump Higher. Thank you. So go ahead to the show notes, wherever you're listening to this on this device and go ahead and shop the book, fertile imagination, a guide for stretching every mom's superpower for maximum impact. Thank you so much for my listeners. And again, if you have any questions whatsoever, I'm going to put my email address in the show notes as well. If you are open or interested in being a guest on this podcast, I do accept guests. Absolutely. Go ahead to the URL where you'll see an opportunity to add your name to the wait list. And yeah, you are amazing. And Hey, what are you going to dream in 2025? Definitely. Let me know. Again, my email will be in the show notes.
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258: The Power of Saying "No": Avoiding Burnout to Foster Success for Female Business Owners and Founders
Are you a people-pleaser who struggles to say "no" without that lingering guilt? Get ready to meet Suzanne Culberg, "The Nope Coach," who's here to help you set boundaries and reclaim your time with confidence! In this conversation, she dives into her bold journey of starting a podcast and the adventure of recording 100 episodes in 100 days. Spoiler: it's no easy task! Suzanne shares her refreshingly honest approach to content creation, recording straight from Zoom without worrying about fancy editing or scripts. If you're feeling uninspired in your business or struggling with burnout, this episode is a fun reminder to stay authentic, let go of perfection, and bring more "you" into everything you create! In this episode, you will hear: The term "business period" to describe cycles of self-doubt and reevaluation in business. Setting firm boundaries and saying no without guilt can prevent burnout and focus on their goals. How Suzanne's informal, unscripted approach helped her connect more authentically with her audience. The value of experimenting in business without overthinking or perfecting. Prioritizing action over perfectionism empowers entrepreneurs to share their ideas and develop essential skills. 🚨This episode is brought to you by Fertile Imagination: A Guide for Stretching Every Mom's Superpower for Maximum Impact This holiday season purchase a copy or two of Fertile Imagination, email me a picture of your copy of Fertile Imagination (under the tree by the candles) using this email address [email protected] , and then on Christmas day I hope to share these images across my social media. Let's support the moms we are and love this holiday season! Shop Fertile Imagination for the holidays! – https://bit.ly/fertilebook About Suzanne Culberg Suzanne Culberg is 'The Nope Coach' who helps over-givers and people pleasers learn to set boundaries and say 'No' without feeling guilty. Suzanne is known for her straight-talking and her wacky t-shirts. She lives in Sydney, Australia with her husband and 2 awesome children. Quotes, that can change your perspective: "First thing I always ask myself is, am I on my business period? You know, it tends to happen about once a month. It's kind of like, oh, are you rethinking your life choices? And it's like, maybe I should just quit and go stack shelves at the supermarket because then at least I can listen to podcasts and get paid for it." - Suzanne Culberg "But I think there's something about the real and raw nature of like, I'm doing this, yes, in service to my business, but also primarily in service to me, like a space to talk about it." - Suzanne Culberg "On my podcast, I hit record and that's it. And I went against that for my daughter because she was so uncomfortable and we had to keep restarting and keep restarting. On the fourth restart, I said to her like, this is it, honey. It's this episode or you're not on the show. Like I'm the boundaries queen. I'm gonna do that with my own child." - Suzanne Culberg "If you're listening to this and you're like, my kids have nothing to do with my business. I don't want their faces on the internet. Like that's totally okay. That's your choice too."- Suzanne Culberg SHARE this episode and start setting those boundaries! Learn how to reclaim your time and energy confidently whether you're facing burnout or just want to bring more authenticity to your work, Suzanne's journey of recording 100 episodes in 100 days will inspire you to embrace imperfection and stay true to yourself. Supporting Resources: Website: https://www.suzanneculberg.com/ Instagram: https://www.instagram.com/suzanne_culberg/ Facebook: https://www.facebook.com/suzanneculberg Exclusive free offer for listeners of the mom founder imagination hub - Building Boundaries Bundle, Normally $50 AUD free to listeners if you use the coupon code MOMFOUNDER Link: www.suzanneculberg.com/bbb Use the code: MOMFOUNDER Subscribe and Review Have you subscribed to my podcast for new moms who are entrepreneurs, founders, and creators? I'd love for you to subscribe if you haven't yet. I'd love it even more if you could drop a review or 5-star rating over on Apple Podcasts. Simply select "Ratings and Reviews" and "Write a Review" then a quick line with your favorite part of the episode. It only takes a second and it helps spread the word about the podcast for writer moms. This holiday season purchase a copy or two of Fertile Imagination, email me your picture (under the tree by the candles) using this email address melissa [at ]melissallarena.com , and then on Christmas day I hope to share these images across my social media. Let's support the moms we are and love this holiday season! Shop Fertile Imagination for the holidays! – https://bit.ly/fertilebook About Fertile Imagination You can be a great mom without giving up, shrinking, or hiding your dreams. There's flexibility in how you pursue anything – your role, your lifestyle, and your personal and professional goals. The limitations on your dreams are waiting to be shattered. It's time to see and seize what's beyond your gaze. Let's bridge your childhood daydreams with your grown-up realities. Imagine skipping with your kids along any path – you, surpassing your milestones while your kids are reaching theirs. There's only one superpower versatile enough to stretch your thinking beyond what's been done before: a Fertile Imagination. It's like kryptonite for impostor syndrome and feeling stuck when it's alert! In Fertile Imagination, you will awaken your sleeping source of creative solutions. If you can wake up a toddler or a groggy middle schooler, then together with the stories in this book – featuring 25 guests from my podcast Unimaginable Wellness, proven tools, and personal anecdotes – we will wake up your former playmate: your imagination! Advance Praise "You'll find reality-based strategies for imagining your own imperfect, fulfilling life in this book!" —MARTHA HENNESSEY, former NH State Senator "Melissa invites the reader into a personal and deep journey about topics that are crucially important to uncover what would make a mom (and dad too) truly happy to work on…even after the kids are in bed." —KEN HONDA, best-selling author of Happy Money "This book is a great purchase for moms in every stage of life. Melissa is like a great friend, honest and wise and funny, telling you about her life and asking you to reflect on yours." —MAUREEN TURNER CAREY, librarian in Austin, TX TRANSCRIPT 00:00:00 Suzanne: I'm just going to start with the frame of when that feeling happens, like that general feeling of blur and what am I doing with my business and whatever. First thing I always ask myself is, am I on my business period? You know, it tends to happen about once a month. It's kind of like, oh, are you rethinking your life choices? And it's like, maybe I should just quit and go stack shelves at the supermarket because then at least I can listen to podcasts and get paid for it. But you know, so it's kind of like, is this a business period type moment or is this a time for, you know, making some changes. 00:00:33 Melissa: Welcome to the Mom Founder Imagination Hub, your weekly podcast to inspire you to dream bigger. Plan out how you're gonna get to that next level in business, find the energy to keep going, and make sure your creative juices are flowing so that this way you get what you really want rather than having to settle. Get ready to discover how mom founders have reimagined entrepreneurship and motherhood. 00:00:56 Melissa: Ever wonder how they do it? Tune in to find out. And stretch yourself by also learning from diverse entrepreneurs, who might not be moms, but who have lessons you can tailor about how you can disrupt industries and step way outside of your comfort zone. I believe every mom's superpower is her imagination. In this podcast, I'm gonna give you the mindset, methods, and tools to unleash yours. Sounds good? Then keep listening. 00:01:26 Melissa: Hello beautiful listeners and viewers on YouTube as well. It's Melissa Llarena, your host. And I'm so excited because I have been in a little bit of a hiatus, but here we are. The first podcast interview back and live just for you is with Suzanne Culberg. She is in Australia. She is the "Nope Coach," as in no, and she helps over givers and people pleasers learn how to set boundaries and say no without feeling guilty. She's known for her straight talking and her wacky t-shirts. She lives in Sydney with her husband and two awesome children. 00:02:03 Melissa: So in this conversation, what I thought was absolutely amazing and totally relevant to you is she gave me a term to kind of explain how I feel. She said you might be on a business period, as in the menses, as in aunt's flow is in your home, pertaining to your business. And I think you may have felt this way if you have had a business for longer than, I don't even know, three months. I'm pretty sure there have been moments that you have felt kind of cranky and a little bit crappy. And Suzanne absolutely shed some light on really actionable, tangible, and exciting things you can do to get out of your funk. 00:02:44 Melissa: Suzanne also shares how she brings her kids into the loop of her business on her podcast. And I love it because one of her kids is able to really work through some anxious feelings by being a podcast guest on Suzanne's podcast. And I think that is a blessing. And I think it is something that we might wanna consider bringing our kids into the loop and helping them work through the nervous energy that is very real if you are speaking publicly. 00:03:15 Melissa: The other idea that I love about Suzanne is that she's very much about execution and feeling free to execute on the ideas that she has on her mind, whether it's her podcast, during which time she has had like 100 day, 200 day sort of sprints where she was recording every single day, releasing to the world pretty real-time. But at the same time, she shares the real benefit of putting any creative work out into the world and having your own business. And it's not what you think at all. So enjoy this conversation. 00:03:46 Melissa: This episode is brought to you by my book, Fertile Imagination. So here's the thing, hold on a second. Like this is so in the raw that I'm just gonna like leave the screen and get the book right here. Okay, so Fertile Imagination. My book is something that I would say took, oh, I don't know, two years to write. Let me make sure it gets on the screen because for some reason we've got some in and out sort of there we go. Oh, this is an art right here is an art. So it's a guide for stretching every mom's superpower for maximum impact. You can find it in the show notes. So bit.ly/fertilebook. 00:04:29 Melissa: This book is really meant to inspire a mom. And right now for this holiday season, I have a challenge I need your help with. Here's the challenge. I would love to see photographs of this book under holiday trees or by Hanukkah candles as you see fit, as you celebrate all over the world. If you can buy this book for yourself or a mom who needs to feel like she has what it takes to carve her own path, whether it's as a business owner or as a mom, a mom who maybe was given the script that she did not want to play. She wanted to be her own kind of mom, then I will be so thrilled and I would love to feature all over my social media. 00:05:12 Melissa: So, go ahead to the bitly link, bit.ly/fertilebook. Grab a copy of this book for the holiday season and just take a picture under the holiday tree or by the Hanukkah candles. Send it to me, [email protected]. This is going to be in the show notes. And I will feature it, I will tag you if that is your heart's desire or your favorite mom friend's desire on my social media so that this way you get some love virtually this holiday season. Here's what I want to say about the book. 00:05:45 Melissa: So this book, beyond the fact that I wrote the book and I started the whole book in Australia, which is where Suzanne happens to live, and I finished it here in Austin, Texas, beyond that, here's what it is. It is my intention with this book to wake up every mom on the planet who has an ambition on her heart that she cannot yet see herself executing on. Your imagination is not a conversation only geared towards children. 00:06:14 Melissa: As moms, we have to model what it looks like to actually pay attention to our imagination and feel that we have the resources, the guts, the conviction, whatever it takes to bring that idea to life. It could be a business idea or could be how you intend to mother your children. So it's pretty broad. You could be a working mom, you could be a stay at home mom, you could be a mom who is really at a crossroads and wants to make sure that 2025 knocks her socks off, but doesn't really understand where to start. 00:06:46 Melissa: Where to start? Read the book, Fertile Imagination. So here's what I did with the book. I actually divided it into three sections. So we're starting with reawakening your imagination, then we're going to play with your imagination, which is really cool because Suzanne in this episode plays with her imagination alongside her kids. You will get it once you listen to this episode. 00:07:05 Melissa: But then, the third one is about stretching your imagination. And I'm doing that right here with you right now, which is asking for help. So if you're listening to me right now or you're watching me on YouTube, the one thing I would love to help get your help on is in purchasing this book using the link in my show notes for a mom who you believe, who you think has what it takes to bring her best ideas to life, whether it's a mom or it's as a business owner or even if she's working for someone else. 00:07:37 Melissa: So, I wanna leave you with that and enjoy the conversation between myself and Suzanne. This is definitely one that's gonna make you chuckle. Pinky promise. 00:07:47 Melissa: Suzanne Culberg, I am so excited. I wanna be in Australia. I wanna be there right now. How are you? 00:07:54 Suzanne: I am fabulous. It's a good time of year to be in Australia too. 00:07:58 Melissa: Don't remind me. 00:08:01 Suzanne: Coming into summer, baby. Or as we call it here, sprummer. We don't have spring in Sydney. We go straight to summer. So it's sprummer right now. 00:08:09 Melissa: Sprummer? That sounds like a spritzer, but okay. That's okay. I don't know. I'm just like, oh, I need a drink right now. But okay. So no more joking. This is serious business. We're moms,we are serious, okay. So Suzanne, I have to ask you this question and I'm positive that anyone who has launched a business has felt this way. 00:08:29 Melissa: So today, I was having a moment, right? It wasn't like a tantrum. It was a moment where I was like, okay, 250 episodes out there in the world. What is my next step? And on top of that, how can I get re-excited about this whole process, right? I don't know if I'm on the path to like a thousand episodes in total or what exactly I want to do with this podcast. So this is coming at you from a really raw perspective but I have to hear all about your year of podcasting every single day. I feel like there's some inspiration there and I wanna say yes, I do not wanna say nope. 00:09:17 Suzanne: So, I'm just going to start with the frame of when that feeling happens, like that general feeling of blur and what am I doing with my business and whatever. First thing I always ask myself is, am I on my business period? You know, it tends to happen about once a month. It's kind of like, oh, are you rethinking your life choices? And it's like, maybe I should just quit and go stack shelves at the supermarket because then at least I can listen to podcasts and get paid for it. 00:09:42 Suzanne: But you know, so it's kind of like, is this a business period type moment or is this a time for, you know, making some changes. So for me, the year of podcasting, how it came about is, it wasn't actually my first podcast. So I had another podcast, which was done all the ways that you're supposed to. It had a jingle, had the intro, it had the outro, it had the call to action every episode, it had the show notes. It was like profesh or as professional as Australians get. And I hated it. Like it did well. 00:10:17 Suzanne: But I didn't enjoy it. I didn't love it. I don't like editing. I don't like writing show notes. I don't like jingles. I never listened to them. So then one day on a tear, my biz wife, like the person who does all the behind the scenes stuff and I turn up and be like the man at the barbecue and get all the accolades, kind of dared me to do my own solo show. She's like, why don't you just talk about all the things that you like to talk about and, you know, just see what happens. I was like, why not? 00:10:48 Suzanne: So like eight o'clock at night, I hit record in Zoom. I recorded three episodes. They're all quite short. They're still there. They're the first three of the show. And then I made some really lame cover art that has since been updated, but everything else about it is the same. And I put it onto Apple and I went to bed. Like, it took me an hour. Like the first show took me a year. I had a podcast producer. I had all this stuff. It's this other podcast I created in the hour. And I went to bed. 00:11:15 Suzanne: And then I thought, we'll see what happens with this. And then when I woke up, I was like, this was a dumb idea. What were you thinking? Like you've got no plan. You've got no show notes. You've got no whatever. Like take that down. So literally had, when I woke up the next morning, had the plan to remove it. But I already had emails like, oh my God, this was the best thing. That's just what I need to hear today. Like, what are you doing with this? And I was like, oh shit, I must be onto something here. Oh, I didn't ask if I can still hear on your show. 00:11:42 Suzanne: Anyway. I was like, so from there, I was like, maybe I'm onto something. So I gave myself the goal of doing a hundred days straight of just recording whatever came up for me that day. Sometimes I had guests, sometimes I didn't, but I would just do a hundred days. And that's how that started. When I go to day a hundred, I liked it so much. I was like, why don't I go for 365? And if anyone listening, this is where I think I went wrong because ideally if I had my time again, I would have gone for 200 days because, from 100 to 365 was a big jump. 00:12:14 Suzanne: I reached this slump at about like day 180 where I was second guessing what I was doing and similar to how you were saying you're feeling right now. And it was really tough for me to keep going. And then one day I was like, this is dumb. About day 180 something I kind of micro quit. And about four o'clock in the afternoon, somebody sent me an email and they're like, hey, there must be something wrong on your end. Your daily episode hasn't come out yet. 00:12:40 Suzanne: I was like, it hasn't come out yet because I'm not doing it anymore, this is really dumb. Anyway, I was really honest and frank with this person and they were like, how will you feel tomorrow if you wake up and you haven't done it? Like who will you be at the end of 365 having done this? And I was like, oh man, that's like a me for me. You know, that's something I would say to my clients or whatever. I needed that in that moment and I still credit that person, Rebecca, if you're listening, you know, for that, because that was the turnaround moment. 00:13:07 Suzanne: And I think for anything that we do, we can get disheartened. We can get, it's like when you're pregnant, I know, you know, this is the mum show, we're both mums. You know, every day of a month has 30 days except the last month of pregnancy, which has like 1,370 days. But it's just like, is this baby ever gonna come? And sometimes we can feel like that with things that we're doing in our businesses. 00:13:28 Melissa: Yeah, I can't say I enjoyed my pregnancy. But, It was a beautiful pregnancy, but with the twins, I was just desperate at the end for sure. And I think in business too, right? There's some moments like at the end of a marketing campaign. I'm not speaking from experience. Yes, I am. You're just kind of like, I actually just want this to stop. Like, it's like before anybody even comes in, it's kind of like, can I just get paid for the marketing? My God, I did so much, you know, just for that piece of it. 00:14:00 Melissa: So okay. Let me hear this out then. So for anyone that's listening and feels like they're in that place, and so it's like a business period. Fun fact, I actually am on my period, but it's like my biological period. So there could be some sort of coincidence or not in that. But let's see. So you're in your business period. I love where we're going with this. And you're having one of those days and you're just like, this has to stop or someone's gonna stop or something's gotta happen. So, okay. 00:14:31 Melissa: Now you're doing the podcast and it's different. There's like a different intention behind like that, you know, 100 episodes every day podcasts. I think the intention matters. So I wanna understand like that first or those first three episodes, was your tone totally different? Like, were you saying things that were coming more from like a raw place? Why do you think people emailed you and actually responded to those first episodes? 00:15:01 Suzanne: That is such a great question. So when I did create it, so I made the three episodes, I published it. I did email my list before I went to bed and said, Hey, I've got a brand new solo show, here's the thing I'd love a review. Cause the thing is people respond really well when you ask them, but so often we don't ask people, we just assume or we just hope, or we just kind of hint. Like in the outro of your show, if you like this, please leave a review, which is, you know, no one even really listens to that part anyway. 00:15:31 Suzanne: But I did say to people, and can you do it now? Like in the first 24 hours, because then Apple will prioritize. And I think when you ask people for something to give people a deadline, because you know, if someone asks you for something and you'll be meaning to, especially a review, people overthink that all, all this, like, I don't want to say something that's not good enough or whatever. So like I basically emailed and said the show's brand new. 00:15:53 Suzanne: Can you review it in the next 24 hours because I wanna get ranked. So I think that's another reason that people then gone on a listeners to it straight away. But your question about the energy. And I think it's just because I felt free. Like I didn't have a marketing plan and he's the steps and he's like, cause the thing is as soon as I listened to something, the six steps to that or the seven steps to that, I'm like, so where's the step, now you're gonna try and sell me your stuff. Look, it's written and it's done in a way. 00:16:24 Suzanne: And I'm not saying don't sell because if you're not selling and making money in your business, you don't have a business, you have an expensive hobby. I get that. But I think there's something about the real and raw nature of like, I'm doing this, yes, in service to my business, but also primarily in service to me, like a space to talk about it. And because I didn't have, pillars and I still don't to this day, I'm over 400 episodes in, I don't have pillars or like I need to touch on this point or whatever. 00:16:51 Suzanne: So now I have it broken up on YouTube by playlist because I have so many topics, people pleasing boundaries. I even have a whole playlist on scam, questionable business practices, because you know, some of the stuff you see online where they're like selling air really gets my goat. But then at the end, I just, I record it and then I'm like, Oh, which category does this fit into? And then I do it that way rather than having, I'm not saying don't have a business plan, but sometimes it's like, as you said, I'm doing a launch. 00:17:18 Suzanne: I need you to touch on this point. I need to send this many emails. I need to have the, and here's the benefits and here's the testimonials. And it's just, I find that so exhausting and so formulaic and so not how my brain works. So I think the flexibility of the show and then, the duration of the episode, I was never married to how long they went for. Like some people I've guessed it on, I've guessed it on nearly 200 podcasts now, a really strict, like it has to go for exactly this amount of time. 00:17:46 Suzanne: And you have to answer these questions, even if the questions don't flow. Like sometimes the topic ends up over here, but no, no, we've got to stick to the thing and if you're a medical doctor doing a patient history, cause you're trying to diagnose something, yes, stick to the formula a hundred percent. If you're doing brain surgery and you're drilling a hole into someone's head. 00:18:04 Suzanne: Yes, please follow procedure. But you know, I think sometimes, you know, podcasts or things with our business, we've lost touch of the more lighthearted nature of why people listen and why they engage. Instead of trying to stick to reaching numbers and stats. And a lot of these stats are vanity stats anyway. 00:18:22 Melissa: That's true. That's true. And they don't look so beautiful sometimes. But you're right, they're vanity stats. I think, you know, it's so interesting that you say that as far as the way that thing could kind of turn in completely different directions. I've got to ask you, so now that 100-day time frame, right? Thinking about that journey. Would you say that you ever went into a direction surprisingly and you're like, yeah, yeah, that's it. That's the sweet spot. That's the topic I really want to talk about. Or maybe like you discovered something about yourself that you were just surprised about, but it wasn't planned. It was just like, here I am back at the mic and oh my God, yeah, I do like talking about this. Did you have one of those moments? 00:19:12 Suzanne: Well. Originally, because I don't edit and I still don't to this day, I thought of the topic before I hit record. So I'd be like, this is episode 100, we're gonna talk about your business period. I actually have an episode called your business period. It's not episode 100 or whatever. But once I got out of the 365 days and I was like, I'm still doing the show, but I'm not stuck to a schedule. Now when I record, I just kind of hit record and I start talking. 00:19:40 Suzanne: And then I come up with the topic afterwards as in like, and that's been the real sweet spot for me, cause I might go in thinking today, I'm going to talk about this, but instead of having like, it has to be the idea fully formed beforehand, it kind of, it grows and ebbs and it flows. And then what I do is I listen to the episode back and somewhere along the line, I, or my guests, when I have guests will say something that will be like, oh, that's the title of the episode. 00:20:05 Suzanne: So, instead of saying ahead of time, we're gonna talk about how to overcome perfectionism or how to build boundaries or whatever, I get the topic afterwards. So I have a little, like, I don't have no idea. I don't hit record and be like full on, what do you call it? Where you jump onto the stage or improv. Not full improv style, have a bit of an idea, but I don't have like, these are the points or these are the pillars. It's just kind of, it's a lot more fluid. And I love that, because sometimes, especially with guests, we'll start in one area. 00:20:35 Suzanne: And then we'll end up totally over here somewhere and people will be like, Oh, I'm so sorry, I bet. No, no, this was great. Cause it's organic. It's like, you're not going to a play and peddling out the same thing you've said on 500 other shows and everybody's bored, including you. And I think, you know, one line or one tangent. And sometimes people don't like that. Some of the reviews I've got, like someone said to me, I was non-tangential, whatever that means, and I couldn't string a coherent sentence together to save myself and I was just like, awesome. You know, you can hit stop. 00:21:07 Melissa: At least you got a really, right? from the top line. It's a number. 00:21:11 Suzanne: Yes. But I just, I just think it's funny. It's kind of like, if you want, here are the three steps and here is this and here is, you know, organized and thought and planned out, there are shows that do that. But not mine. I think so often we try and tell people like it has to be done in this way. And like says who, I love the shows that I listened to as a listener. 00:21:32 Suzanne: Where they update, what's happening with their families? Where have they traveled to? Like obviously not so long that it's just a personal diary, but like I love that little bit of taste of behind the scenes as opposed to here's just another clinical thing that's trying to sell me something that I probably don't even want. 00:21:48 Melissa: Yeah, you know, it's funny. I was thinking about a podcast that I listened to, Story King podcast, and he was interviewing his wife. And he was like, yeah, and we're in a closet in our house because the sound quality is great here. And I don't know that behind the scenes information was so irrelevant to the conversation, but it made it, kind of like endearing. 00:22:14 Melissa: I was like, I could imagine two people in a tiny little closet, you know, making sure that the sound is right and probably sweating bullets too, because maybe you have all this like, curtains and all this jazz to kind of get that room, you know, just right. So, okay. So here we are 100 days and you have two kids, right? 00:22:34 Suzanne: Mm-mmm (agreeing). 00:22:35 Melissa: And so they existed during those 100 days. 00:22:39 Suzanne: Yeah. And they've both been on the show as well. 00:22:41 Melissa: During that time you had them on the show? 00:22:43 Suzanne: Yeah, I guess both of my kids have guested on my show in the first hundred days and then in they've both been on once more each between day 100 and day 365. So they've done two episodes each and my son is so proud of himself whenever he introduces selfless that does something at school. He's like, yeah, you should choose me. Cause I'm good at public speaking. I've been a podcast guest. 00:23:03 Melissa: How cute. How cute. Okay. So that's interesting. Cause what I like to say is that it's so helpful in terms of mom guilt to like bring our kids into our world of business, right? And it gives you a different purpose. It's like, oh, okay, now my child can learn this skill, learn Canva, or now my child can edit my audio. By the way, my three boys, they've seen my audio and I can't say I'm editing it, but they critique it and they're like, mommy, that sound sucks. 00:23:38 Melissa: But like, you know, whose kids has access to this sort of software and can tinker and learn and explore all these modern tools. So I love that you involve them. So what do you think, what did you get out of those conversations with them on your podcast? And what do you think they got? I hear confidence on one end. 00:23:58 Suzanne: Well. For me, like my daughter is, she has anxiety and she's very introverted. And I have a one-take, no fake policy. Like I hit record and that's it. And I went against that for her because she was so uncomfortable and we had to keep restarting and keep restarting. On the fourth restart, I said to her like, this is it, honey. It's this episode or you're not on the show. Like I'm the boundaries queen. I'm gonna do that with my own child. 00:24:27 Suzanne: And, you know, so it's just kind of like how, what I learned was sometimes how we make, not excuses, exceptions for the people closest to us. And sometimes it has to be like, you know, when they say no friends in business or no family in business, it's got to start, you know, from the top. 00:24:42 Suzanne: And, you know, from my son, it's, he's been a lot more involved. There's been a few episodes where he's just appeared. Like we did a Christmas edition that he was in. And then last year on Halloween, cause it was the 31st, he walks past in a Grim Reaper costume. So, you know, it's just how people will roll with it as opposed to, and it's your conscious choice. Like I've chosen to include my children in my business. My podcast is video as well. So they, you know, on the video, they're very much included. If you've chosen, if you're listening to this and you're like, my kids have nothing to do with my business. 00:25:16 Suzanne: I don't want their faces on the internet. Like that's totally okay. That's your choice too. But you get to choose what suits you best, but having my family involved, whether they've been on the actual episodes or when they just knew I was recording, it was really cool. It's like, you know, it's time for mommy to do her episode today. I never had a set time. I just recorded whenever and how much they would like turn down their music or, you know, be quiet or you know, be involved in it and, you know, how many stats did you get or reading the reviews, it became a family thing. 00:25:45 Suzanne: And this year, as my goal is to grow my YouTube channel, the kids are keeping an eye on how many likes it's reached or subscribers or whatever, or, oh, look at this comment. So, and also too, sometimes the comments aren't favorable. So they're learning that, you know, people on the internet aren't always nice and how you respond to that, whether you leave it there or get to, you know, bless and block, because my attitude is if I wouldn't let them in my house, I'm not letting them in my space. So, I'm being part of all the process. 00:26:11 Melissa: Yeah, I love that because I think, you know, sometimes especially before the era of working from home was as evident, like our kids would just see us like, it's, you know, kind of like the book ends of our day, right? So before we went to work and then after we came back and they would see us going to work, maybe a little bit like, oh, great, I'm going to work. And then you come back home and then it's just like, you know, throwing yourself on the sofa or whatever, but they had no idea like why, why that was, right? 00:26:44 Melissa: Like what was happening in the middle? Like what is this mysterious world of work where you're leaving not so happy, coming back totally exhausted? You know, it doesn't seem that fun to me. And I think with the pandemic and the homeschooling moment we had, especially in Sydney, I remember it was like, what, 160 days or 90 or 190 the second time around. 00:27:04 Suzanne: That's crazy. It was the longest continuous lockdown in the world and it was not, not pleasant. Zero stars. Don't recommend. 00:27:11 Melissa: I counted them. I counted every day, but anyway, you know, it was also just an opportunity to kind of have the kids witness like, oh, this is what they're doing, you know? And like, oh, this is what it is. And, just kind of give language around, you know, disappointments and language around like exciting moments, you know, in our business, in our lives and have them see it. So I think that's amazing. And I think that's an opportunity for anyone that's listening to kind of invite your kids into your world as well. So 100 days just to kind of keep going back to that because it sounds so big. 00:27:48 Melissa: Like I'm talking to some people that, for them, one podcast episode is like, oh my God, kill me now, I can't do it. You know, it's this fear thing. And I just spoke to another podcaster who told me that in order for her to get the listeners or the downloads that she wanted, she needed to start doing two episodes every single week is what she was told. And she burnt out from doing two episodes every single week. How did you navigate like or prevent or maybe you experienced burnout during that time of a hundred days every single day podcasting? 00:28:26 Suzanne: Well, I think, like anything, there is so many ways to do it. And when you do it in a specific way. So like I've been podcasting this last couple of years, I've been writing a newsletter since 2017. And when I first wrote my newsletter, it would take me all day. Like I would, write it and then I'd edit it and then I'd rewrite it and then I'd format it and then I'd and like you know I was like why am I treating this like the Mona Lisa I'm sure that took more than a day but you know what I mean it's like it's a newsletter woman. Now I do what's called the Sue special. I use the Pomodoro technique set the alarm for 25 minutes. 00:29:02 Suzanne: I write, I edit, I schedule, I post, I send, I don't care if there's spelling mistakes like I'm not saying I'm trying to write crap but I'm not attached to this is not a published book. And with the podcast, I think sometimes people, if they script it, if they come up with their pillars, if they're like, okay, what am I gonna sell at the end? And how my, what am I gonna say is gonna lead to this? And how am I gonna give value, whatever that means. Cause who do we get to decide what the value is? Cause it might be valuable to us and somebody else might be like, yeah, that's so boring and basic, but we think and overthink plan over plan, edit and over edit. And that takes so much time. And it was interesting to me. 00:29:44 Suzanne: I have no next to no social media presence. I gave up Facebook and Instagram in 2024. I do put some reels up from time to time when I feel like it, but my show has grown and I think it's because if you basically ask people, and people like I ask every episode, I'm like, but do you ask or do you just put the outro on that nobody listens to because, I've listened to it the first time and it's the same every time, like genuinely ask people. Who do you know who might benefit? Have you had benefit from this episode? Share it with them. Like genuine outreach, genuine connection. 00:30:18 Suzanne: And also too, not to get so stuck on the numbers, which is a vanity stat. Because I've had episodes where, if you look at the tangible numbers, it didn't have that many downloads. But when people get on a connection call with me or buy something of mine, and I'm like, oh, how did you find me, whatever. And they say the episode, I'm thinking that one tanked. Like from, you know, so sometimes, I think we get caught up, like, do you want to be an influencer? 00:30:44 Suzanne: That's a different business than being like, I'm not an influencer. I'm a business owner. I don't need hundreds of thousands of downloads, but I do have quite a number, but I don't need that many. And how, and what's your capacity? What are you selling? How many is fully booked for you? And also trusting that like a podcast episode has a very long half life. 00:31:04 Suzanne: If you put something on Facebook, it's got a half-life of three hours. After that, it's lost in the scroll. But a podcast episode, like I guested for years before I had my own show, people still reach out to me about an episode I did in 2020 in the self-isolation series. They found that four years later. So you might be like, oh, well I put this podcast episode out and nobody listened to it. Like I had a guest on recently. I love her fiercely. And she messaged me and she's like, well, nobody's joined my list yet. I was like, give them a minute. The episode came out yesterday. Like, It's not like social media where it needs to be instant. It can have quite a long shelf life. 00:31:40 Melissa: Yeah, I would agree. I would say, yeah. People are still finding me from things that I've written in 2011, this was, yeah, it works. It works. And I think it's also, you know, as you're putting out the episodes, intention, energy, the fact that you're sincerely consistently and in a different way asking people to take action. So, it doesn't sound like just, you know, rote, memorized kind of sentences. I can see the value there. And so then now I heard that you also involved your kids over the course of 100 days. So, okay. So did you, during those 100 days, feel invigorated at any point about what you were doing. Did you actually? 00:32:31 Suzanne: Oh, the first 100 days was magic. I don't think I had any slumps in that that I remember. As I said, the big slump I know came in about day 180. But I had days where I was like, you know, like we all do. But then I think about how I'd feel afterward. Like, you know, afterward, I feel like, Yes! And sometimes I'm sure if you watch them on YouTube, you can see at the beginning, I kind of like robotic, this is day, whatever. But then. So excited about this topic and then I get into it and then how you feel afterwards. And I think, you know, if you are doing a podcast and afterwards, you're like, now I've got to edit, now I've got to make reels, now I've got to do this. Energetically, that's like B.O. Your potential clients can pick that up. Even if you read the script, even if it's beautiful, if you're not excited by it, they're not going to be either. 00:33:19 Melissa: Oh my God. Yeah, I get it. I totally get it. And I've gotten that reaction too, from different listeners. And if you're a listener right now, let me know if this one hits home for you because I think Suzanne's definitely sharing some wisdom for any business owner that is in that, you know, slump or that period, that business period moment. We've got the Advil right here to prevent any cramps, right? We got to stop the cramps and we got to keep on going and find our bliss. So, okay, Suzanne, where can someone, and I don't even know if I finished that question, did I finish that question or am I like leaving you hanging right now? I'm like— 00:33:54 Suzanne: No, that's all good. 00:33:55 Melissa: Okay. 00:33:56 Suzanne: I think the point, if you're in the business period, and also too, to that point, sometimes, you know, when you're in a physical period, you're like, you know, it's gonna be over in five days. As you said, have some Advil, get a heat pack, give yourself some chocolate, read a book. Like you don't need to reinvent the universe today, it's still gonna be there tomorrow. And the same with your business. The thing that you've creating, making, like recently I launched something. I'll share this. It flopped! The thing that I launched. I, sold one. I was like, what is wrong with it? This thing was amazing. But if I just focused on that, but what, what you can't control, like I was so laser focused, I wanted to sell this thing. I sold 15 of the other things that are pre-recorded and available on my website. Like people come across, people find you, things grow, you have results. But sometimes we're so laser focused. The podcast needs to bring in income or this, this course needs to sell. And then we're so busy looking at this that we don't notice what's happening over here. And I think, you know, with my original podcast, I was really disappointed cause I did all the right things. 00:35:04 Suzanne: And it just didn't do anything for me. And then the thing I did on a tear works, but what about the skills I learned in that first one about how to speak and how to upload and, you know, how to be consistent. So sometimes, you know, they say an overnight success is 20 years in the making because all the things that you learn along the way contribute. 00:35:24 Melissa: Yeah, I agree with you. So Suzanne, where can people find you? Who are you? How can you help them? And the yeah, and you're in Australia, but I'm sure you're global, right? 00:35:35 Suzanne: I certainly am. Mostly I work with the US because I work in the morning before my kids wake up. So I'm Suzanne Culberg, the nope coach. I help women set boundaries and say no without feeling guilty or mean. And I do that through online courses and coaching. Best place to find me is my website, suzannecolberg.com. If you're a rebel, you'll see it and go straight to the don't click, which is what I want. (Laughing) And that's the best place to contact me. Yeah, my contact form's fun. I don't do social media. I do have a podcast called The Nope Coach, which is on all the downloadable places and YouTube. And yeah, if you'd like to like me on YouTube or subscribe, that's the word. Amy, my goal is a thousand people. So if you can contribute to that, I would love it very much. 00:36:19 Melissa: Absolutely. I subscribed. It's official. We're like now, like, you know, besties or YouTube besties. So Suzanne. 00:36:26 Suzanne: I love it. 00:36:27 Melissa: This was sensational. I appreciate you. I love your pineapples in the background for anyone that's watching this in video format. Yeah, this was sensational. I appreciate you. And I hope you keep podcasting a thousand more episodes. 00:36:42 Suzanne: That'd be awesome. Thank you. 00:36:44 Melissa: So, I wanted to just leave you with these thoughts. So with regards to Suzanne, what I want you to really just consider is in your life, where are you stopping yourself from executing your best work? Are you stuck in the nuance of details and the nuance of how this is going to look perfect or who's gonna think what? Are you stuck because your idea doesn't feel good enough? I want you to just take a page out of Suzanne's book and just execute. Forget about the perfection. Forget about the, am I gonna get this right? Am I gonna perfectly tailor this podcast episode or perfectly write my first book draft? Like, You've got to really let go of that sense of I will be judged up front so that you can benefit in learning the skills. And Suzanne shared some of the skills she got out of really podcasting for 100 days consecutively. So, I invite you to just try that one thing. And again, buy my book for a mom that you believe in, whether it's yourself or it's someone else. It's Fertile Imagination, A Guy for Stretching Every Mom's Superpower for Maximum Impact. 00:37:54 Melissa: And the link will be in the show notes, wherever it is that you're listening to this. The link is bit.ly/fertilebook. Grab the book today. I want to see it under Christmas trees. I wanna see it next to Hanukkah candles. I want to see it everywhere so I could definitely feature it on social media and give you my love back. Thank you again.
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257: How Energy Vampires Are Draining Female Leaders and How to Protect Yourself Before the Holidays – Health Scare Minisode #4 for Mom Founders and Entrepreneurs
In this minisode, I explore the fourth pillar of energy management—emotional unburdening—a critical component in reawakening your imagination and maintaining the energy to bring your ideas to life. This concept is one of the key insights from my #1 Amazon bestseller, Fertile Imagination: Every Mom's Superpower (grab your copy today— https://bit.ly/fertilebook ; it makes for an excellent holiday gift!). This episode is part of my health scare series, where I share a 30,000-foot view of the four pillars that contribute to your zest for life and the ability to light up like a Christmas tree while getting things done. Today, we're focusing on emotional well-being and how to release the burdens that drain your energy. The Four Pillars of Energy Nutrition: How food choices, like avoiding dyes, play a role. Movement: Why something as simple as walking can protect your health. Sleep: The mindfulness behind a restorative night's rest. Emotional Unburdening: The focus of today's minisode. What Are Energy Vampires? Energy vampires are the mental and emotional suppressions that drain your reserves, such as: Suppressing how you really feel at work. Suppressing your personal stories and life experiences. Suppressing your honest thoughts about people infringing on your boundaries. These acts of suppression are costly and can leave you depleted, stealing the energy you need to pursue your dreams. The Solution: Journaling Journaling is a powerful tool for emotional unburdening. By writing out your thoughts and feelings, you can uncover the reasons behind your emotional suppression and gain clarity on what's holding you back. This awareness empowers you to reclaim your energy. Let's Connect! We all benefit from hearing each other's stories. If something in today's episode resonated with you, I'd love to hear about it. Your story could inspire someone else in our community or provide hope to a fellow mom during this holiday season. Here's how to share your story: Email: melissa [at] melissallarena.com LinkedIn: Follow me and send me a private message - https://www.linkedin.com/in/melissallarena/ Your voice matters, and your experience could be the message of hope that someone needs right now. Want to be a guest of the Mom Founder Imagination Hub podcast? Sign-up HERE to get on the list if you are interested in bringing your story, insights, or wisdom to the podcast. Or, use this link if you prefer (both go to the same place): https://witty-thinker-2643.kit.com/ba49a6d870 - I cannot guarantee that you'll be a guest however I do refer to this list every quarter to determine who would be a good fit. Keywords: Female leaders podcast, Mom founder tips, Entrepreneurs who are moms, Health tips for mom entrepreneurs, Managing energy as a mom entrepreneur
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256: Know of Any Well-Rested "Older" Moms? – Health Scare Minisode #3 for Female Leaders and Entrepreneurs (Mom Founders)
Imagine a mom who decided to have her child a bit later in life. She's built a career, a life she's proud of, and now, with her child in the picture, her priorities have shifted to focus on being there for the long haul. She's not just aiming to add years to her life but to feel energized and healthy—able to show up fully for her family and her business, now and for years to come. But there's one hurdle that keeps her from living that vision: sleep. Almost every night, she lies awake, thinking about her family's future, overanalyzing the day, running through endless lists, and planning for what's next. And despite her best intentions, these sleepless nights leave her feeling drained, worn down, and struggling to keep up with the demands of her day. Sound familiar? It's a story that so many of us can relate to—feeling constantly pulled between doing more, being there for everyone, and somehow still running on empty. In today's minisode of my podcast, I talk about how this pattern of sleeplessness can become a serious health concern and how one mom fixed this concern real-time by attending one of my free offerings this last summer so that you can too! Why am I releasing these minisodes? Over the last 13 years, I've found that my highest-performing clients are those who prioritize their health. They understand that to imagine their best lives or careers, they first need a limitless source of energy—and that energy reserve comes from focusing on four key pillars: nutrition, exercise, sleep, and emotional well-being. This realization inspired me to create these minisodes, each packed with ideas to support you as a leader, whether in the office or at home. And because I know that taking an honest look at where we stand is easier with someone fearless about accountability, I'm offering you, my podcast listener, a free 30-minute energy audit. There's no catch, no sales pitch—just a chance to help you assess where you are and how to boost your energy. Take advantage of this opportunity to see what this podcast can do for you, and let's work together to support the life you imagine. Sign-up by 11/15 - https://www.melissallarena.com/sessions/ In a free, 30-minute Energy Audit session, I'll help you uncover exactly where you're losing energy and how small, strategic adjustments in areas like nutrition, exercise, emotions, and sleep can make a meaningful difference. Imagine how it would feel to: Sleep restfully, waking up ready to face the day Run your business with focus and clarity Be present and energized with your family This isn't about a full lifestyle overhaul but about finding sustainable solutions that work for you and your lifestyle. If you're ready to understand your unique energy needs and make shifts that last, click here to book your free session https://www.melissallarena.com/sessions/ Looking forward to helping you reclaim your energy! -Melissa Llarena
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255: Avoid This Ingredient to Keep Your Energy High – Health Scare Minisode #2 for Female Leaders and Entrepreneurs (Mom Founders)
You might be wondering, "Melissa, how am I supposed to find the energy to reawaken my imagination and then actually bring my ideas to life—for my business, my family, or even just for myself?" I know the feeling well. It can seem like I'm on one wavelength, while so many moms out there in business are on another. My heart's wish for you is simple: to wake up each day with renewed energy, excited enough about your vision to leap into action—maybe even brave enough to go live on social media! Imagine a world where your passion for your business sustains and energizes you. That's been my mission since I wrote Fertile Imagination, yet I know many of you are still searching for the spark, still yearning for a way to get out of bed with fresh ideas and the energy to make them real. This is why, in this minisode series, I'm stepping away from my usual interview format to focus on the essentials of health. Without good health, there's nothing I—or anyone else—can say that will magically give you the energy you need to bring your best ideas into the world. In this bite-sized series, I'm diving into four pillars of health that I discuss in Fertile Imagination, each crucial for reclaiming your energy and sparking your imagination: Nourishing Food: There's a profound connection between what you eat and how you feel. Nourishing your body with whole, nutrient-dense foods fuels your vitality. When you choose real food over processed options, you'll find yourself feeling more energized and focused. Energizing Movement: Adding regular movement into your day isn't just for physical health; it also invigorates your mind and boosts creativity. Even short bursts of activity can enhance your clarity, mood, and energy, empowering you to face challenges with renewed vigor. Restorative Sleep: Quality sleep is non-negotiable for keeping up your energy and mental sharpness. Restorative sleep allows your body and mind to recharge, boosting your productivity and creativity. By prioritizing sleep, you're setting yourself up for success each day. Emotional Unloading: Managing stress is essential to freeing up energy. Whether it's through mindfulness, journaling, or a quiet moment to yourself, releasing emotional weight helps you approach your work with clarity and resilience. In last week's minisode, I introduced the topic of "Health Scares" and shared a story about Gil, who experienced a career-stopping stroke ten years ago. If you missed it, be sure to catch up. Today, I want to explore the idea of "fake vs. real food." It's baffling, really—many of us, myself included, know better but still struggle to make the healthiest choices. Remember, you're in control of your health, and that's a message I want to reach your kids, too. I'm also extending a special invitation to my listeners for a limited-time, free 30-minute Energy Audit Session. During this call, we'll take a closer look at where you stand in terms of food, movement, sleep, and mental health. Why? Because your health is the foundation of your success. I believe that by sharing my journey with you, I can empower you to prioritize yours. This energy audit is especially for moms who want to make today their January 1—a fresh start. Let's build the health foundation that will help you pursue your wealth and happiness with renewed energy. Sign up today: https://www.melissallarena.com/sessions/ Side note: the ingrediant that I do mention in this minisode is linked to these things so be sure to have a listen especially if you have a ton of Halloween candy around your house. Allergic Reactions: Some people experience allergic responses to this additive, especially those with asthma or aspirin sensitivities. Reactions can include hives, itching, and, in rare cases, difficulty breathing. Hyperactivity in Children: Studies have shown that this and other artificial food dyes may be associated with increased hyperactivity in children, especially those with ADHD. This has led to calls for its removal from certain products aimed at children. Migraines: This additive has been linked to migraines in some individuals. People with a sensitivity to this dye may experience headaches or migraines after consuming foods or drinks containing it. Potential Hormonal Disruption: Some research suggests that artificial food dyes, including this one, may interfere with hormone function, although more studies are needed to confirm this effect. Digestive Issues: Sensitive individuals might experience digestive symptoms such as bloating, cramps, or nausea after consuming products containing this additive. Oh to add insult to injury this ingredient requires a warning label if included in food in other parts of the world. Book mark this episode and get educated around this.
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254: YOU May Be More at Risk for Heart Attacks! – Health Scare Minisode #1 for Female Leaders and Entrepreneurs (Mom Founders)
Welcome to this urgent minisode – created with one goal: to protect your well-being and help you access the energy you need to bring your boldest dreams to life. This episode is specifically for female leaders and founders in high-pressure roles, who often put their health on the back burner as they push forward in their ambitious careers. Consider this your wake-up call. In this unedited, real-talk episode, I'll share two immediately actionable tips designed for the busiest high-powered executive out there. These simple yet powerful strategies will help you avoid burnout, reclaim your energy, and start fueling your imagination to execute on your most ambitious dreams. This isn't just about self-care; it's about survival, stamina, and success. Keywords to Get You Tuned In: Energy Boost for Female Founders Avoiding Burnout in High-Pressure Roles Health Tips for Ambitious Women How Leaders Can Prioritize Self-Care Mental and Physical Health for Female Entrepreneurs Finding Energy for Your Big Dreams Self-Care Strategies for Busy Women Leaders Balancing Leadership and Personal Well-being Call to Action: Take action now – buy my book Fertile Imagination using this LINK right here for only 16.99 USD, or type: https://bit.ly/fertilebook and as a thank-you for your purchase, you'll get a chance to join me for a free 30-minute energy audit call. I'm genuinely worried about you, and your health is more important than anything else you'll do today. If you're feeling drained, exhausted, or in need of a reset, this is your sign to listen in and make a change. Don't let another day go by without addressing what truly matters – your health and energy. Tune in, take care, and let's make sure you're equipped to conquer everything you've set your sights on.
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253: How To Perform Despite Personal Emotional Turmoil - Career Failure Minisode For Female Entrepreneurs ( Mom Founder )
As a female entrepreneur with a child or children, you're juggling many roles, but what happens when life throws an unexpected emotional curveball? Whether it's a breakup, the loss of a loved one, uncertainty, or even receiving tough news about someone close to you, the weight of emotional pain can feel overwhelming. And yet, your business still demands your attention. In this episode, we're discussing how to balance emotional challenges with the need to keep performing, sharing practical strategies and an inspiring case study of a woman who faced emotional hardship and found a way to keep going. This is a direct and to the point minisode with precisely the next steps you can take today to feel better tomorrow. This minisode is brought to you by my anti-burnout 30-day productivity resource for mompreneurs! Grab it today before I put it behind a sales wall soon because it THAT's good: https://bit.ly/imagineaplan Greater context on the resource: let me help you figure out what to do next especially if you just burned yourself to the ground and currently feel stuck or unclear or what to do next. Take my Profitable Relationships Action Tracker and Planner today. It's free and a great mom-friendly planner! It links your vision to daily actions, helping you stay focused and energized as you build profitable relationships. Set yourself up for a successful year and an even bigger one ahead! It also sees to it that you replenish your energy to prevent burnout. ($97 value, helps avoid a $2,400 trip to the ER from exhaustion) - https://bit.ly/imagineaplan Share this episode with one female founder today who is facing an emotionally tough moment yet has a big meeting or opportunity that she's been working towards and as they say "the show must go on" for her and for the wellness of her family too. Episodes referred to here include: https://www.melissallarena.com/unrealistic-expectations-and-the-power-of-word-of-mom-marketing-with-three-wishes-ceo-margaret-wishingrad-episode-181/? About Melissa Llarena Melissa is a bestselling author (learn more on www.fertileideas.com), imagination coach behind the Fertile Imagination to Networking Success Group Coaching Program, consultant, speaker, contributor to ForbesWomen articles that have garnered 4 million-plus views, and the podcast host of the Mom Founder Imagination Hub. Featured guests include GaryVee, Beth Comstock, Suzy Batiz, David Meltzer, and hundreds of other unconventional thinkers. Melissa has been featured in the WSJ, Business Insider, Fox Business, CNN Money, The Huffington Post, and other publications. She holds a psychology degree from NYU, an MBA from the Tuck School of Business at Dartmouth, and a Transformational Coaching Academy certificate and is training to become a meditation practitioner. Melissa lives in Austin, Texas, with her husband and three sons (one singleton and a set of identical twins). Connect with Melissa: https://www.linkedin.com/in/melissallarena/
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252: Just Because I Work From Home, It Does Not Mean I Don't Work - Career Failure Minisode For Female Entrepreneurs ( Mom Founder )
Have you ever felt like your family or friends don't take your business seriously because you work from home? Do you hear comments like, "Oh, she can do it—she doesn't really work," even though you're running a full-time business? If you're craving reassurance and validation, this episode is for you. We're diving into the unique challenges female entrepreneurs especially moms face when others dismiss their work, and how to reclaim your confidence and sense of worth as a business owner. This is a direct and to the point minisode with precisely the next steps you can take today to feel better tomorrow. This minisode is brought to you by my anti-burnout 30-day productivity resource for mompreneurs! Grab it today before I put it behind a sales wall soon because it THAT's good: https://bit.ly/imagineaplan Greater context on the resource: let me help you figure out what to do next especially if you just burned yourself to the ground and currently feel stuck or unclear or what to do next. Take my Profitable Relationships Action Tracker and Planner today. It's free and a great mom-friendly planner! It links your vision to daily actions, helping you stay focused and energized as you build profitable relationships. Set yourself up for a successful year and an even bigger one ahead! It also sees to it that you replenish your energy to prevent burnout. ($97 value, helps avoid a $2,400 trip to the ER from exhaustion) - https://bit.ly/imagineaplan Share this episode with one female founder today who no longer wants to wait for other people to make her feel like she's running a real business and instead wants to reassure herself. About Melissa Llarena Melissa is a bestselling author (learn more on www.fertileideas.com), imagination coach behind the Fertile Imagination to Networking Success Group Coaching Program, consultant, speaker, contributor to ForbesWomen articles that have garnered 4 million-plus views, and the podcast host of the Mom Founder Imagination Hub. Featured guests include GaryVee, Beth Comstock, Suzy Batiz, David Meltzer, and hundreds of other unconventional thinkers. Melissa has been featured in the WSJ, Business Insider, Fox Business, CNN Money, The Huffington Post, and other publications. She holds a psychology degree from NYU, an MBA from the Tuck School of Business at Dartmouth, and a Transformational Coaching Academy certificate and is training to become a meditation practitioner. Melissa lives in Austin, Texas, with her husband and three sons (one singleton and a set of identical twins). Connect with Melissa: https://www.linkedin.com/in/melissallarena/
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251: How to Shake Off Some Very Big Failure Energy - Career Failure Minisode For Female Entrepreneurs ( Mom Founder )
If you've ever experienced the heartbreak of disappointing numbers after pouring your heart into a campaign, you're not alone. Whether it's low sales, unbooked appointments, or an epic fail, every entrepreneur faces setbacks. In this episode, we're focusing on how to rebuild confidence and motivation by connecting with other female entrepreneurs who've faced similar failure and emerged stronger. This is a direct and to the point minisode with precisely the next steps you can take today to feel better tomorrow. This minisode is brought to you by my anti-burnout 30-day productivity resource for mompreneurs! Grab it today before I put it behind a sales wall soon because it THAT's good: https://bit.ly/imagineaplan Greater context on the resource: let me help you figure out what to do next especially if you just burned yourself to the ground and currently feel stuck or unclear or what to do next. Take my Profitable Relationships Action Tracker and Planner today. It's free and a great mom-friendly planner! It links your vision to daily actions, helping you stay focused and energized as you build profitable relationships. Set yourself up for a successful year and an even bigger one ahead! It also sees to it that you replenish your energy to prevent burnout. ($97 value, helps avoid a $2,400 trip to the ER from exhaustion) - https://bit.ly/imagineaplan Share this episode with one female founder today whos need the motivation to get back up after a fall. Together, we can create a space where failure is just a stepping stone to success! Episodes referred to here include: https://www.melissallarena.com/suzybatiz-shares-the-wisdom-the-cherishes-for-giving-her-the-freedom-and-ability-to-trust-herself-and-accept-whatever-comes-her-wa-episode-67/? About Melissa Llarena Melissa is a bestselling author (learn more on www.fertileideas.com), imagination coach behind the Fertile Imagination to Networking Success Group Coaching Program, consultant, speaker, contributor to ForbesWomen articles that have garnered 4 million-plus views, and the podcast host of the Mom Founder Imagination Hub. Featured guests include GaryVee, Beth Comstock, Suzy Batiz, David Meltzer, and hundreds of other unconventional thinkers. Melissa has been featured in the WSJ, Business Insider, Fox Business, CNN Money, The Huffington Post, and other publications. She holds a psychology degree from NYU, an MBA from the Tuck School of Business at Dartmouth, and a Transformational Coaching Academy certificate and is training to become a meditation practitioner. Melissa lives in Austin, Texas, with her husband and three sons (one singleton and a set of identical twins). Connect with Melissa: https://www.linkedin.com/in/melissallarena/
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250: Behind the Mic: Podcast Guest Appearances & Journey of a Mom Author
This October 31 marks the one-year anniversary of my book, and I'm celebrating by sharing a curated list of my favorite podcast appearances! I've chosen episodes where the hosts' perspectives, personalities, and generosity truly shone. With so many podcasts out there, it's a challenge to find ones that are both genuinely helpful and uplifting. If I'm serving up a celebration, it's going to be as satisfying as the best birthday cake. Join me as I revisit standout moments, including the time a host knew my book so well it made me question my own words, the episode where I shared my birth story, and another where I reveal how I've personally taught my sons about the importance of global networking. Discover how you can use your imagination to tell your own story and feel truly worthy! In this episode, you will hear: My book Fertile Imagination turns ONE on Halloween, and I'm celebrating by sharing all the juicy details from my podcast tour! 🎉 I also got personal with some epic birth stories. Turns out, talking about twins and birth is a podcast hit! 📚 Insider stories, hilarious moments, and behind-the-scenes glimpses that didn't make it to air. 🎧 Reimagining motherhood to harnessing the wild power of a mom's imagination. 🏆 Business secrets about leads, creativity, and balancing life as a mompreneur. (You won't want to miss these nuggets!) 💡 Podcast Links: Momshine https://podcasts.apple.com/us/podcast/ep-213-unlocking-your-mom-superpowers-to-monetize-your/id1713258255?i=1000657444166 Birth As We Know It https://birthasweknowitpodcast.com/ep-64-melissa-llarena-3-vaginal-births-twins-gabriel-noah-nicholas/ 100% Guilt-Free with Tami Hackbarth https://www.tamihackbarth.com/blog/episode-224 From Startup to Wunderbrand with Nicholas Kuhne – Oslo, Norway https://podcasters.spotify.com/pod/show/nicholas-kuhne/episodes/The-Networking-Playground-Skills-for-Kids-and-Parents-e2n2jcg Disruptive CEO Nation https://www.disruptiveceonation.com/episode-220-melissa-llarena-host-of-the-unimginable-wellness-podcast-austin-tx-usa/ Founder Podcast with Ash https://podcasts.apple.com/us/podcast/founders-podcast-season-6-episode-2/id1704344895?i=1000665122742 Mastermind Parenting Podcast With Randi Rubeinstein https://mastermindparenting.com/podcast-293/ - 293: It's Never A "Good" Time To Have A Baby Or Start A Business The Bosshole Chronicles https://www.buzzsprout.com/1451638/14827121 Networking in the AI Era With Melissa Llarena https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=qXIkNRyE-5M When Mommy Grows Up https://podcasts.apple.com/us/podcast/accelerate-your-dreams-by-mobilizing-your-network-melissas/id1663617412?i=1000638299524 And/Or Podcast, Ashley Blackington OTD, OTR/L Dovetail® founder & CEO - CareTech solutions for today's families https://andbothpodcast.buzzsprout.com/2254305/14952247-25-harnessing-motherhood-s-untapped-business-potential-with-author-melissa-llarena KozeKoze By Garrett Wood https://podcasters.spotify.com/pod/show/kozekoze/episodes/333--Fertile-Imagination-with-author-Melissa-Llarena-e29uk98 This episode is brought to you by Fertile Imagination: A Guide For Stretching Every Mom's Superpower For Maximum Impact – My book is now available on Amazon in its paperback version and Kindle format. Grab a free chapter on www.fertileideas.com. DM me on Instagram @melissallarena just type the word FERTILE and I'll share the link if that's easier to get to fertileideas.com for all the details you need to celebrate your own Fertile Imagination! Here's that link: https://www.instagram.com/melissallarena/ About Melissa Llarena Melissa is a bestselling author (learn more on www.fertileideas.com), imagination coach behind the Fertile Imagination to Networking Success Group Coaching Program, consultant, speaker, contributor to ForbesWomen articles that have garnered 4 million-plus views, and the podcast host of the Mom Founder Imagination Hub. Featured guests include GaryVee, Beth Comstock, Suzy Batiz, David Meltzer, and hundreds of other unconventional thinkers. Melissa has been featured in the WSJ, Business Insider, Fox Business, CNN Money, The Huffington Post, and other publications. She holds a psychology degree from NYU, an MBA from the Tuck School of Business at Dartmouth, and a Transformational Coaching Academy certificate and is training to become a meditation practitioner. Melissa lives in Austin, Texas, with her husband and three sons (one singleton and a set of identical twins). Quotes, that can change your perspective: "I know so many hard stories and I frankly was scared beyond my imagination when I was a first time mom for obvious reasons." "I don't know all the birth stories, but just like our thumb prints or fingerprints, we're all different." "It is something that doesn't go unnoticed with regards to me as the author because it's really intimidating putting yourself out there, especially in the written word, because it's quite permanent. It's not like I could go back into a landing page and make some edits." "Hey, if you are a mom author who wants to talk about your book without being on physical stages then making podcast appearances is the mom ultimate hack!" "A Fertile Imagination is, it's about having this ability to envision something that you have never seen before, done by any mom in your circles." SHARE this episode with anyone passionate about writing, podcasting, or balancing the demands of parenting and entrepreneurship. As we celebrate the one-year anniversary of "Fertile Imagination," let's embrace these insights and keep supporting one another in our creative and business journeys. Supporting Resources: Schedule a free call to see if Fertile Imagination to Networking Success my signature program is the right fit: https://www.melissallarena.com/sessions/ Podcast: Mom Founder Imagination Hub: https://www.melissallarena.com/podcast/ Instagram: https://www.instagram.com/MelissaLlarena/ Or, grab for free your copy of the "From Contact to Connection: The Mompreneur's Go-First Networking & Follow Up Playbook": https://witty-thinker-2643.ck.page/21e52edb87 Subscribe and Review Have you subscribed to my podcast for new moms who are entrepreneurs, founders, and creators? I'd love for you to subscribe if you haven't yet. I'd love it even more if you could drop a review or 5-star rating over on Apple Podcasts. Simply select "Ratings and Reviews" and "Write a Review" then a quick line with your favorite part of the episode. It only takes a second and it helps spread the word about the podcast for writer moms. TRANSCRIPT 00:00:00 Melissa: October 31st is the official anniversary of my book. And I thought what I would do right now is really share with you how it's been going in terms of a podcast tour. 00:00:15 Melissa: Welcome to the Mom Founder Imagination Hub, your weekly podcast to inspire you to dream bigger. Plan out how you're going to get to that next level in business, find the energy to keep going and make sure your creative juices are flowing so that this way you get what you really want rather than having to settle. Get ready to discover how mom founders have reimagined entrepreneurship and motherhood. Ever wonder how they do it? Tune in to find out. And stretch yourself by also learning from diverse entrepreneurs who might not be moms, but who have lessons you can tailor about how you can disrupt industries and step way outside of your comfort zone. I believe every mom's superpower is her imagination. In this podcast, I'm gonna give you the mindset, methods, and tools to unleash yours. Sounds good? Then keep listening. 00:01:09 Melissa: I cannot believe it's been a year since I published my book 'Fertile Imagination.' Happy birthday. Oh my god. So October 31st is the official anniversary of my book. And I thought what I would do right now is really share with you how it's been going in terms of a podcast tour. Let me explain. I have been a guest on other podcasters' podcasts. And in doing so, I have been able to really share some intimate stories in terms of behind-the-scenes moments of having written the book, starting in Australia, finishing here in Austin. Also, I've been able to share things like my birth story. Who would have thunk it? 00:02:01 Melissa: I have had such a grand time really being on other people's platforms because it is one thing to write a book and another thing to really witness how it's made an impact in terms of the readers, and also the listeners too because now it's an audio format. Did you know that I have a hardcover? I have a paperback cover and an audio book format as well. So please if you're interested in the book just go to fertileideas.com. This will be in the show notes and you can just get a free chapter to start with. It is on that page right there. And you can also really join in on the fun. 00:02:42 Melissa: But this episode is really about the podcasters that I've had the pleasure of meeting this entire season, post-book launch. And my book again, it's gonna be one year. It's gonna be one, it's gonna be one on Halloween. And so it's coming up. And so that is why I wanted to today really just start celebrating, right? And I wanna be sure that it is going to be a worthy celebration. I'm not gonna play Kool & The Gang, Celebration, which by the way, was my very first favorite song ever, which tells you how old I am, but I don't care because my book is one. And I... 00:03:25 Melissa: But I do want to just kind of like express my gratitude before I go into this list. So what I did was I curated a list of the podcasts that I have been a guest on where I have really met people with amazing personalities, with wonderful questions, with a level of depth to them that is very, very admirable. And I definitely am learning from. And I want to be sure that in this conversation with you, my beautiful, dear listener, that you have a good idea of which podcasts are absolutely worthy of your time and attention because I know there's so many out there, but not a lot of them are saying something new. And I want to be sure that I put these guys on your map, on your radar, in your iTunes list. And because of that, I wanted to be a little bit... How should I say? Organized. So we're going to do this in a fairly frameworked fashion. Again, a little bit of my B-School just pouring through the audio waves here. 00:04:28 Melissa: I'm going to share with you about 11 or so of the podcast guest appearances that I've most enjoyed this year. Again, my book is turning one on Halloween. That is why I'm sharing these episodes with you. And I'm just gonna give you a little bit of the behind-the-scenes, but we're gonna go through each one in terms of these three concepts. So the focus of the conversation, I wanna give you a little bit of snippet of that. Then we're gonna go into why it stood out. And this is more like the behind-the-scenes. It's often when we're not recording that some of the best podcast conversations happen. Join me as I want to reveal a little bit of those moments in this my book birthday's month episode - behind the scenes insights whilst on my podcast guest tour for Fertile Imagination.! 00:05:12 Melissa: And then the third thing we're gonna go through is why you should listen. Why you should listen to these podcasts. So I curated these podcasts for you and I've been on every single one. And for me, it's been a blessing and it's been amazing. And I wanna be sure that you, too, find the nuggets that they offer and that you can apply to your own life. So this one, again, top 11 or so podcast guest appearances that I've been on since my book was born on Halloween almost a year ago today. 00:05:48 Melissa: So here we go. So it's not in a particular order. I'm not ranking this. Okay. This is not like corporate America, performance evaluation. Not at all. So I want to just give a shout out to MomShine. So this one, I will say from a focused perspective, when I was speaking with the host, Alicia, we were talking about harnessing our superpower, right? And if you read the book or you know what a Fertile Imagination is, it's about having this ability to envision something that you have never seen before, done by any mom in your circles. And so we spoke about that. 00:06:23 Melissa: And what I really thought stood out with regards to this conversation with Alicia is something that my dad is gonna be like, definitely giving me a heck of a lot of… I don't even know. Compliments or whatever on. Which is this, I shared on this podcast of MomShine, this notion of compensation versus aggravation. So this is what stood out for me. Alicia got me talking about something that I was taught by my dad as a little girl. And so here's the idea. If you are in a work environment where your compensation is very, very low in relationship to the level of aggravation that you feel, that is a sign that you must leave. 00:07:07 Melissa: So that is something that stood out for me in terms of MomShine and in terms of my Conversation with Alicia and I definitely want you and encourage you to listen to MomShine. And why is that? So here's the thing, Alicia definitely produces quality work. She is absolutely... I mean, she's been on the helm of corporations that have grown exponentially, many of whom you've heard of, but I'm not gonna say here because I don't wanna get it wrong. But, again, check out MomShine. Amazing conversations there with Alicia. And check out my episode on MomShine. 00:07:24 Melissa: All of this is going to be in the show notes, by the way. So you don't have to take notes and you don't have to memorize these things. Just check out the show notes and you'll get a link to every single one of these highly curated podcasts on which I have been a guest throughout this last year. Almost, almost in time right now, delivered to you by my book's birthday. Again, it's going to be on Halloween. So, oh my God, don't forget to reach out to me on Instagram. Let me know if you got a copy. If you read it, let me know. Just tell me, "Happy book birthday." I would be so grateful. 00:08:16 Melissa: Second podcast that I wanted to share with you that was sensational, Birth As We Know It by Kiona. Here was the focus. The focus, this is really focused and I apologize if you have kids listening, but just understand I'm gonna use a word that starts with a 'V.' So here is basically the title to that episode, Birth As We Know It. She's a doula, so please be mindful of where I'm going with this. So she says, three vaginal births, twins, Gabriel, Noah, Nicholas. Yes, we talked about my birth process, story experiences in very great detail. It's not often that you get to tell your birth story, especially when you've had a great birth story to tell. And the reason why I want you to really consider this conversation with Kiona and Birth As We Know It is because I think it is so important to actually have good stories of triumph when it comes to giving birth. 00:09:19 Melissa: I know so many hard stories and I frankly was scared beyond my imagination when I was a first time mom for obvious reasons. This is the first time, you have no idea how it's gonna go. But then also when I was birthing my identical twins, I was completely petrified and just in a place of fear for about 36 weeks, but who was counting? So that's why you want to check out Birth As We Know It, right? 00:09:46 Melissa: So the focus was my vaginal births. Yes, plural, everybody. Came out that way. But then on top of that, what stood out was also with Kiona. She was so generous, so, so generous. She let me go on and on in terms of the birth story and she does that for all her guests. So I wanna just call her out for that. That's amazing. And then in terms of why you should listen to Birth As We Know It, it's for you if you're scared. If you're pregnant and you're scared, go to her podcast. Also, please be mindful. Read to see which one you want to listen to. I don't know all the birth stories, but just like our thumb prints or fingerprints, we're all different. So there might be some more encouraging stories and more scary stories. And I know that was grammatically incorrect, but I'm gonna go with it. So, Birth As We Know It, Kiona. 00:10:38 Melissa: Third one. There's 11 here so... 100% Guilt-Free Self-Care by Tami Hackbarth. Focus. The focus was about creating your own opportunities, right? So having the guts to talk to strangers, go to concerts, go backstage and all of that jazz. So here's something that was stands out as far as a 100% Guilt-Free Self-Care with Tami. So first of all, Tami has a sense of humor and a half. So you will absolutely enjoy the conversation, any of the conversations, but the one with Tami and myself, we actually did it so that we were focused on her being my guest and me being her guest. So we did a back to back recording. So I encourage you to check out the conversation 100% Guilt-Free Self-Care with Tami. She, again, like I said, why should you listen? Because she's very personable and she's a fair play method facilitator. If you want to learn more about that, you got to check out her podcast. So absolutely check it out. 00:11:46 Melissa: All right, another podcast. Again, we're going for 11. Right now we're at one, two, three. This is the fourth. From Startup to Wunderbrand with Nicholas Kuhne. This one comes from Oslo, Norway. Yes, I will be going to Oslo at some point. Can't tell you when, but I will. Okay, the focus here is totally unlike anything else I've ever had a conversation about, which is, how to teach our kids how to network from a global perspective. When I was having that conversation with Nicholas, I was so thrilled. You would think somebody gave me like a free Katz's Delicatessen sandwich or something, or like those wedge fries that they have, or potato fries, whatever. But they weren't. I was just excited because I got to talk about the world, my children, and speak to someone that understood and appreciated the nuances of marketing and advertising, which is my background. So that was really cool. 00:12:39 Melissa: So why you should listen, because if you're a parent, this is gonna inspire you and give you some global ideas. In terms of what stood out, the fact that Nicholas was open to talking about children and expat situations, and whether or not kids should or they benefit from moving to different countries or different places. So I thought that was really cool. And why you should listen, because Nicholas has a smorgasbord of guests and it's really appealing to hear from someone that has experiences living in very different countries. I speak of the host himself, Nicholas. So check it out. From Startup to Wunderbrand with Nicholas Kuhne. 00:13:21 Melissa: Alrighty. Disruptive CEO. Okay. So I want to just share the backstory here. I met Allison Summers at Podcast Movement, and she's the one that told me how to become a number one Amazon bestseller. So Disruptive CEO Nation is her podcast. She is in Chicago. She's affiliated with the American Marketing Association. And Allison is sensational. The focus was leadership and innovation. I believe that I spoke about Beth Comstock, who's in my book, former CMO of GE. 00:13:53 Melissa: What stood out, again, is really, it's Allison. It's about the host, right? So she really helped me become a number one Amazon bestseller. 100% beyond shadow of a doubt, totally grateful to Allison. So Disruptive CEO, definitely if you work in corporations and want to ascend to leadership, definitely check out Disruptive CEO Nation. And if you want to hear stories, that is a place to go. Disruptive CEO Nation. 00:14:22 Melissa: So let me get this on this rank. I should have been more like David Letterman and gone through the top 10 or whatever, but I'm a mom. I'm not David Letterman, right? Okay. So let me just count this here. One, two, three, four, five, six. So now we're on the sixth podcast where I was a guest and you might really enjoy. This podcast, global here, right? This is how I get to talk about the book and never leave my house and not have to get childcare, by the way. Going on podcasts versus being on physical stages. So that's a mom hack right there. 00:15:00 Melissa: The podcast is Founder Podcast with Ash. Ash is located in London town. And it was a great conversation for a couple of reasons, but the focus was about entrepreneurship and expansive thinking. And it really keyed in on leads. So as a business owner, that's a really big challenge, getting leads for a lot of us. And so we talked about that at length, also talked about parenting. And what stood out for me was that he got me to reveal so many secrets about what's working now to get leads. So definitely if you have a SaaS product, especially because his podcast is geared towards people that are in that world, check out Ash's podcast. Again, he is in the UK. If you're YC graduate or you've heard of that organization, he was an alumni. 00:15:52 Melissa: Okay, so 7 out of about 11, 7 about 11 podcasts that I've been on. And here's the thing, I've been on so many more podcasts. And if you have a podcast that you enjoy, I would love to hear about it because I'd wanna be on that podcast too. So just DM me on Instagram. All of that information is in the show notes. But here we go, the 7th out of the 11th podcast that I am right now celebrating having been on. It is Mastermind Parenting Podcast with Randi Rubenstein. I hope I said it correctly. It's so funny when you have 11 different last names, it gets to be a little bit complicated. 00:16:30 Melissa: But here we go. Mastermind Parenting Podcast with Randi Rubenstein. So the focus was strong-willed business and strong willed kids, actually. Randi's perspective was on kids, my perspective was on business, and we were on each other's podcasts. And I really enjoyed it because we talked about the parallels between being a mother and being a business owner. So that's what stood out for me. And that is also why you will want to listen if you have a strong willed kid, especially. And if you have a business that feels like a strong-willed kid, you will also wanna listen. It was an episode that I really enjoyed. 00:17:08 Melissa: Okay, so here is the eighth one. Again, we're going for about 11, give or take. This is a great name. You're gonna really like this name. It's called The Boss Hole Chronicles. Okay, so best podcast name. Let me just say it right there. John Broer interviewed me and what I would say the focus was, was really about, you know, having a corporate mindset. And what I thought was amazing is that you can be your own boss hole. And that is kind of where I netted out with the conversation with John. So if you're a female who works in a corporation or you have your own business and you are a mom, oftentimes we are harder on ourselves than our bosses, technically, are on us. 00:17:59 Melissa: And I want you to be mindful of that. But check out The Bosshole Chronicles. I was on that podcast. John is amazing and you will enjoy the conversation. It is definitely more for corporations, even mid-sized companies as well. So check it out. Everything's in the show notes. Do not delay. I am definitely sharing all these links with you because I want to be sure that you check out these podcasts. They are amazing and I'm so grateful. 00:18:26 Melissa: So here's another one, networking in the AI era. So this one is really cool in the sense that when I had this interview scheduled, it was like a 24 hour turnaround. And the person who interviewed me, it's so hilarious. I have everybody's name except his, but I think this is Jonathan. He actually shared with me so much wisdom as far as building my own business, when the recording button was off, which is always the case, right? 00:18:58 Melissa: So networking in the AI era, the thing that was the focus was really being authentic and not using AI in order to, you know, orchestrate conversations that are fake, but using it to help you research as an example. And then what stood out, as I said, was just, you know, the podcast host's openness to sharing business building insights off record. And I appreciate him so much for that and why you should listen, because he's got his stuff together. I mean, he's really talking about AI in general. And so if that is a topic on your heart, I use ChatGPT, by the way, every day all the time, then I encourage you to check out Networking in the AI era with me, Melissa Llarena. I was a guest on that podcast. 00:19:44 Melissa: All righty, so three more, and that's it. Just three more, three more, but these are really great. And I wanted to be sure I got them to you before my book birthday, which is on Halloween. Okay. When Mommy Grows Up, When Mommy Grows Up by Becca and Marie. So it's two moms. And I had such a great time on this conversation or this podcast because the focus was about, you know, having our own village when it comes to building our business, not just when we want to raise a family, but for our business purposes. And what stood out for me was Becca and Marie's level of knowing my book. 00:20:22 Melissa: So there's some times where it feels a little eerie. It's like, wow, they're using my words. They read my book. They're like thinking and using my terms. And sometimes it's eerie if you've never written a book. But it was really cool cause it's like, dag, they're really busy and they read my book and they found a lot of value. So go to When Mommy Grows Up if you're interested in like career transition, sort of conversations and insights. 00:20:47 Melissa: Okay, two more, I promise. I'm like that birthday girl that just does not wanna leave the dance floor. And if you know me, like personally, you know what I mean. Okay, so two more podcasts where I've been a podcast guest that I wanna be sure you check out because I think they're worthy of your mom time. They can make for great, great, great parts of your weekly habits are, dun, dun, dun, this podcast here is called And/Both Podcast. It is by Ashley Blackington. So here was the focus of the conversation. It was really about untapped business potential in you as a mom. And we got very mom and business specific in terms of what's possible and what might be harder to accomplish, but possible with imagination. 00:21:38 Melissa: And so my conversation with Ashley is definitely one that you'll want to consider, especially If you're a mom who maybe you want to get funding from investors, Ashley's on that journey, so you might want to learn from her from that perspective, or maybe you want to have a better handle and hold on your childcare or caregiving logistics because Ashley is coming up with an app that is essentially the first CRM designed for families. So there you go. Check out that podcast, And/Both Podcast. 00:22:14 Melissa: Okay, so last but not least, because there are so many other podcasts I've been on, I've been grateful this whole year to be on other people's podcasts. So last but not least is Koze Koze Podcasts and it's spelled K-O-Z-E K-O-Z-E. Here's the reason why having the conversation with Garrett Wood was amazing. So the focus was really about the book, for imagination like, what is a fertile imagination, what inspired me to write the book? You know, how is it that I could apply it in my life? That's the, that's where the conversation went. And I have answers to that in this episode with Garrett. So I have it in the link. And again, the podcast is called Koze Koze. 00:22:56 Melissa: Here's the thing. There are so many opportunities as a podcast host myself to really help the guests feel at home and feel very safe and nurtured and cozy, right? And Garrett is an ace at that. So that is what stood out for me. She made me feel so welcome. I really felt like, you know, the intangibles of my journey were captured in that episode. And I encourage you to listen to her podcast, Koze Koze, or to buy her nipple cream if you're breastfeeding. 00:23:31 Melissa: So a lot of these podcasters are like me, we're mom founders. So we've got a lot of things going on but we have a message worthy of amplifying and sharing with the world. And if you've ever felt like you wanted to launch your own podcast or perhaps you have had a podcast but you got to episode number 7 and you didn't go on from there, then this can be a moment to just reflect upon why you let it go and maybe you should start again. And maybe I could be your guest next, right? 00:24:01 Melissa: So I just wanna say from the bottom of my heart, from the...bottom of my tiny toe on my right foot, if I had to be real specific, I can't express fully how strongly I feel about the community that I have around me in terms of fellow podcasters, fellow mom founders, and anyone who has read the book, reviewed the book on Amazon, purchased the book, or even mentioned the book, or lived out some of the ideas and concepts in the book. It is something that doesn't go unnoticed with regards to me as the author because it's really intimidating putting yourself out there, especially in the written word, because it's quite permanent. It's not like I could go back into a landing page and make some edits. 00:24:46 Melissa: So I appreciate you. I am so celebrating my birthday on October 31st. This is the first episode where I'm talking about the anniversary or the book birthday. And I encourage you to follow me every single Tuesday for a new episode. So here's the thing, I wanna be sure that you and I are like two peas in a pod, and this is how we can actually achieve that. If you're watching this on YouTube, I would encourage you to go ahead and subscribe officially. Here's why, when you subscribe, when I see that number go up, so it's like 200 and something right now, if it goes up to like, I don't know, 345 or something, then...it actually makes me do a happy dance, right? 00:25:31 Melissa: So you know how like we might like buy drinks for like the birthday girl through subscribing, you're kind of virtually buying me a drink on YouTube. And so I encourage that strongly. Here's the other thing on YouTube, there's this like notification bell, which I know a lot of people tell you, they're like, please tap it, hit it, whatever it might be. However you wanna get there, please select the bell so that you are notified when a video pops up. And if you're listening to this on iTunes, Spotify, Audible, however you're listening to this, I would encourage you to think about this. Let's make this relationship official. Actually hit follow, hit follow and this way, you're gonna get without having to do anything, your mom like why add things to your calendar, make the seamless, you're gonna be able to get a new episode every single Tuesday. 00:26:24 Melissa: All of this is in the show notes. You could totally just use it as a quick way to tick off something that happened today, right. So if you hit the bell or if you hit subscribe or follow, add that to your to-do list and then go ahead, check out the boxes so that you feel accomplished. So that's an idea for you. All right, so here's something that I wanted to just share with you. And I should have said it at the top, but I wanted to just kinda share this at the end. So here's a tiny reveal before I let you go. 00:26:54 Melissa: On the day of the pod of no, delete that, on the day of the actual launch. So October 31st, 2023, I actually realized that I was number one in two categories, but I was number three in another category and I never told anyone. So you're the first one to hear that. So here's the thing. I was, or the book, Fertile Imagination, managed to get to number one in the category of motherhood and also in the category of women in business. But the one spot, you could only pick three, where I was a number one, I was number three in, was women's biography. And here's the fun fact behind that. 00:27:38 Melissa: Do you know who was number one in women's biography? It was Jada Pinkett, and it was her book Worthy. And so I always thought to myself, I was like, well, you know what, if you've got all the money in the world and the resources in the world, I'll let you go ahead of me. Have no problem there. I don't even know who was number two, but for me, that just made me laugh because I was like, I'm okay with that. I'm totally okay with Jada's spot. 00:28:03 Melissa: So that's it for me. I mean, that is it. I'm so thrilled that you listened to this point because I mean, you know, doing a top 10 list or top 11 or 12, whatever it was, might be a little bit more clunky than I had imagined, but I wanted to get this out to you because I really am grateful. And my birthday is coming for my book, for my book, October 31st, and I want us to celebrate together. This is not like a one person journey. No man, no mom is an island. I want to know what you're celebrating too. I want to know what questions you have in terms of writing a book, doing a podcast, launching a business or growing a business. And to do that, let's keep on the same journey together. Follow, subscribe, hit the bell button. And any questions, I'm always on Instagram. 00:28:54 Melissa: So thank you so much. And until next Tuesday, Happy Birthday to Fertile Imagination.
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249: Between the Chaos of Motherhood and Entrepreneurship: A Mash-Up of Insights from Two Leading Moms and Me on Making It Work
We need to do a better job at resourcing ourselves, especially if you've decided that you have an unwavering commitment to see your business and family-life vision through! It's not an easy feat to disrupt industries, create your own, or parent multiple kids. It can be chaotic, even on a good day! That's why this week we're diving into the secrets of how to make it all work—yep, all of it! Do you wonder how you can be a boss at work and a rockstar mom at home and still have time to chase those big, audacious dreams? Well, wonder no more! I'm bringing you an exclusive mashup featuring two powerhouse mompreneurs, Zibby Owens (mom of 4) and Liz Tenety (mom of 5), who are going to spill the beans on balancing business, babies, and everything in between. You ought to know that I have 3 sons with identical twins in that mix, so I know a thing or two about chaos and what it takes to be in business—I've been here for 13 years! Trust me, you don't want to miss their golden nuggets of wisdom, and I'll be chiming in with some of my own wild stories (hello, diaper blowout during a sales pitch?!) So, grab your coffee, pop in those earbuds, and let's get inspired to stretch our imaginations and turn those crazy ideas into reality! Ready? Let's go! In this episode, you will hear: How to use your mom skills like humility, adaptability, and patience to dominate the business world. Infusing your work life with playful strategies that help you manage stress and overwhelm like a boss. Master the art of profitable relationship-building with techniques that are both strategic and authentic. Say goodbye to awkward networking events! Get tools to navigate those pesky insecurities and show up with confidence in every business conversation. Learn to make bold asks and communicate fearlessly to achieve your wildest business goals. This episode is brought to you Fertile Imagination to Networking Success by my LIVE 9-week group coaching immersive program on becoming a powerful strategic networker using the Imagination to Impact and Income Method™ to connect with the right people, lead the right conversations, and swing open the right doors to success. The DOORS are officially open! But hurry, the DOORS close on September 27th at 5pm CST. I want to be sure you do not miss out on this opportunity and for that reason I invite you to send me a DM today and ask me anything about the opportunity to enroll today. Send me a DM today: https://www.instagram.com/melissallarena/ to ask me anything before the doors officially close. Happy to hop on a quick 15-minute call too so DM me and I'll send you a link for us to talk. Otherwise, head on to www.melissallarena.com/network Imagine this in only 9 weeks, you could: Build profitable relationships and exceed your growth goals. Gain access to opportunities, boost your confidence for bolder asks, and raise prices. Feel energized by a fresh approach to relationships that taps into your imagination—the source of joy and fresh ideas. Navigate impostor syndrome, reignite your creativity, meet mom obligations, and achieve your best year ever with a focused plan. Approach your year-end goals with a mindset that leverages your advantages as a mom—letting your kids keep you grounded and present while inspiring you with their growth mindset. How? By enrolling in the Fertile Imagination to Networking Success Program for Mom Founders! This game-changing experience which you can enroll in right HERE https://www.melissallarena.com/network/ by September 27th at 5pm CST will show you how to: Transform your networking approach with 9 weeks of live coaching to implement the Imagination to Impact to Income Method™ for genuine connections without gatekeepers. Access an on-demand curriculum with research-based, cross-industry insights covering who to network with, how to find them, and how to create your networking calendar for higher-impact relationships. Experience a one-on-one role-playing session using storytelling to differentiate your business (and yourself), and receive expert feedback on communications for momentum. Revitalize your leadership skills by integrating the strengths you gain from being a mom with diverse modalities and tools that leverage the art of play. Use techniques such as meditations to get your creative juices flowing, boost productivity, and increase your energy. Connect with a community of like-minded mom founders for support and accountability, keeping your standards high and your vision strong. Journal your progress in a workbook to track your improved ability to tackle impostor syndrome and create a visionary leader roadmap to increase confidence. To ensure your long-term success, I've also included additional opportunities to apply these new networking skills by providing you with... Lifetime Access to the on-demand curriculum: Take the guesswork out of networking and refresh your strategy whenever needed. (you can teach this to your kids too!) Two months access to an Alumni online community of like-minded mom founders (priceless value; one contact can turn into a life-changing opportunity!) Two tickets to attend four virtual Quarterly Impact Appreciation Mixers focused on continued education in networking so that you can continue to deepen relationships. And this time only you will also get instant access to three exclusive bonuses that can help you make time for building profitable relationships, making bigger asks to get more, and attracting the right people with resources—so you can connect while you sleep. Get it off your plate!: Reclaim hours each week to easily fit relationship building into your life for business growth. Bolder Communication Strategies Toolkit: Step into a bolder persona and make bolder asks to optimize every interaction. Brush Up Your LinkedIn Profile: Unlock massive networking success by making your LinkedIn profile work harder for you. I know this sounds too good to be true so don't take my word for it, listen to what others have said about my method. Visit the website: https://www.melissallarena.com/network/ About Melissa Llarena Melissa is a bestselling author (learn more on www.fertileideas.com), imagination coach behind the Fertile Imagination to Networking Success Group Coaching Program, consultant, speaker, contributor to ForbesWomen articles that have garnered 4 million-plus views, and the podcast host of the Mom Founder Imagination Hub. Featured guests include GaryVee, Beth Comstock, Suzy Batiz, David Meltzer, and hundreds of other unconventional thinkers. Melissa has been featured in the WSJ, Business Insider, Fox Business, CNN Money, The Huffington Post, and other publications. She holds a psychology degree from NYU, an MBA from the Tuck School of Business at Dartmouth, and a Transformational Coaching Academy certificate and is training to become a meditation practitioner. Melissa lives in Austin, Texas, with her husband and three sons (one singleton and a set of identical twins). Quotes, that can change your perspective: "We need to do a better job of resourcing ourselves. We have almost everything that we need right under our noses." - Melissa Llarena "The idea is to leap to your goals and make big strides, not get there at a snail's pace." - Melissa Llarena "I feel like I lead as a mom, and I feel like it has only made me a better leader, and they don't talk about that at business school at all." - Zibby Owens "Being humble. 100%. The superpower is the ability to constantly learn" - Zibby Owens "It is about energy, it is about time, it is about money, and all those things kind of intersect and just encouraging people to use their creativity." - Liz Tenety….on how being a business leader helped her lead her family "What if hanging out with your kids can be part of your competitive advantage, a business strategy, so that you can come up with a better business idea or something more innovative, certainly something that is simpler to describe." - Melissa Llarena "I think it is so important to bring the whole of you to the table because, because as a mom with a business, that is your competitive advantage." - Melissa Llarena SHARE this episode and unleash your imagination, tap into your superpowers, and build a successful business while being an amazing mom. Join the conversation with other mom founders and learn how to achieve your goals with confidence and support! 💪 Supporting Resources: Schedule a 15-minute call to see if Fertile Imagination to Networking Success my signature program is the right fit: https://go.oncehub.com/ClientSessionMelissaLlarena Podcast: Mom Founder Imagination Hub: https://www.melissallarena.com/podcast/ Instagram: https://www.instagram.com/MelissaLlarena/ Or, grab for free your copy of the "From Contact to Connection: The Mompreneur's Go-First Networking & Follow Up Playbook": https://witty-thinker-2643.ck.page/21e52edb87 Subscribe and Review Have you subscribed to my podcast for new moms who are entrepreneurs, founders, and creators? I'd love for you to subscribe if you haven't yet. I'd love it even more if you could drop a review or 5-star rating over on Apple Podcasts. Simply select "Ratings and Reviews" and "Write a Review" then a quick line with your favorite part of the episode. It only takes a second and it helps spread the word about the podcast for writer moms. TRANSCRIPT 00:00:00 Melissa: We need to do a better job of resourcing ourselves. We have almost everything that we need right under our noses. And I think in terms of being a mom, this is something that we don't even think about and it's not our fault at all because it's not a topic of conversation. 00:00:24 Melissa: Welcome to the Mom Founder Imagination Hub, your weekly podcast to inspire you to dream bigger. Plan out how you're going to get to that next level in business, find the energy to keep going and make sure your creative juices are flowing so that this way you get what you really want rather than having to settle. Get ready to discover how mom founders have reimagined entrepreneurship and motherhood. Ever wonder how they do it? Tune in to find out. And stretch yourself by also learning from diverse entrepreneurs who might not be moms, but who have lessons you can tailor about how you can disrupt industries and step way outside of your comfort zone. I believe every mom's superpower is her imagination. In this podcast, I'm gonna give you the mindset, methods, and tools to unleash yours. Sounds good? Then keep listening. 00:01:17 Melissa: Today's episode is brought to you by Fertile Imagination to Networking Success. It is a live nine-week group coaching program that really helps you become a powerful strategic networker using my secret method, the Imagination to Impact to Income method. And it's going to help you connect with the right people. It's going to help you have the right conversations and ultimately swing open the doors of your success. Here's what's included in this nine-week program. So you're gonna have on-demand curriculum that is going to be research-based, but also relevant to your industry, because I've worked in about 14 different business units and several sectors around the world. So I'm bringing those insights to the table so you could apply the lessons learned to your business. 00:02:05 Melissa: You're also going to have a private one-on-one session with me, whereby you're gonna work on your storytelling skills, so that this way you distinguish yourself and you bring the best stories to that when you're having those important, game-changing business conversations. Also, we're gonna work on your leadership skills and your ability to navigate overwhelm, stress, anxiety, through the art of play. That's what makes this program different. I have infused the art of play, the different modalities that I've leveraged, such as mindfulness and meditations, to get you through this experience. So that this way, even though, you might feel intimidated by having conversations with high profile people. You can get through them with ease. 00:02:50 Melissa: Also in this program, it's a community of like minded mom founders, which makes a huge difference. This community is carefully curated so that your standards stay high, so that your company vision stays in place, so that no mom is left behind. That is my commitment to you. I absolutely want every single participant to finish the program. Unlike other programs where they might be on like digital shelf spaces collecting dust, this program is nine weeks live. You will see me every single week and you will have access to actionable insights to actually use these skills and put them into practice from day one. 00:03:37 Melissa: Okay, also in the program is a workbook where you're going to be working on imposter syndrome and how to navigate it. I fully believe that it's not something we could just erase and it's not something that we need to feel bad about. I think it's important to proactively navigate imposter syndrome and whether you are building relationships to get clients or building relationships to get podcast guests or to get investors. Those moments bring up several insecurities and I want to be sure that you can navigate the conversations with confidence with tools in your tool kit. Also in this program and so important to say you're going to have access to the on-demand curriculum for the rest of your life. So this is lifetime access and hint your kids can leverage these tools too. 00:04:25 Melissa: Also, you're going to have two months access after the program to an alumni online community. So you're going to stay connected to the same ladies that you took this course with for two months thereafter officially. And how cool is this? You will also be able to participate in almost like continuing education opportunities. So once a quarter, I will be doing a quarterly impact appreciation mixer. Here's what happens during these mixers. I'm going to invite a guest. Yes, likely someone from my podcast, to share their wisdom on networking building skills. I want to be sure that you have relevant, timely, and even like forward-looking skills at your fingertips. So by participating in this program, Fertile Imagination to Networking Success, you will have an opportunity to, you and your guests, attend these quarterly impact appreciation mixers four times in the course of a year and that can include after the program has ended. So I wanted to share what's involved in the nine week live group coaching program. 00:05:35 Melissa: I also wanted to say that in terms of participants, what they have told me is that they've been able to complete this program successfully with only three hours of time necessary every single week. So that's important. You'll see that in the FAQs. Just go to MelissaLlarena.com forward slash network. There you will have a lot of your questions answered and you can invest in Fertile Imagination to Networking Success. Should you have questions, reach out to me, absolutely. Doors close on September 27th at 5 p.m. Central Standard Time. And here's what happens at that point. For those who invest in Fertile Imagination to Networking Success between today and September 27th at 5 p.m. Central Standard Time, you will have three extra bonuses. 00:06:24 Melissa: Here are the bonuses. So if you've ever felt uncomfortable reaching out to people or putting yourself out there in social media, like LinkedIn, I have a rush up your LinkedIn profile bonus delivered by a LinkedIn expert and stand-up comedian impromptu person. So I love that bonus. The second one, get it off your plate. So I know as a mom, you have a lot of things on your plate right now and different business priorities. Building your network. Learning how to create profitable relationships can be the key to your success and the most energy efficient pathway there. And so I want to be sure that you make room for it on your plate. So I have a bonus for you again if you're investing by September 27th at 5pm, which is the absolute deadline where you will learn from an expert how to take things off your plate so that you can put networking and this program on your plate. 00:07:19 Melissa: The third bonus is about having the ability to speak with more confidence and making bolder asks. So the idea is to leap to your goals and make big strides, not get there at a snail's pace. And for that, you have to ask older questions and you have to communicate more boldly. And so I have the third bonus available to those who invest by September 27th at 5pm central standard time. All in all, this program for our imagination to networking success is for a mom founder who wants to achieve business growth. You might be currently experiencing a plateau and you want that growth spurt because you want to achieve your goals by this year end. On top of that, you wanna achieve them in a very particular way. You don't want to drain yourself to the finish line and you don't want to completely ignore your obligations as a mom and commitment and desire to be a mom, nor should you have to. 00:08:19 Melissa: And that is why photo imagination to networking success requires expansive thinking. It requires my method, imagination to impact to income method. And that's also why it infuses the art of play because at the end of the day, if you are pursuing business growth, wild business growth, it is important to have resources available to you that can nip overwhelm in the bud and that can help you navigate interruptions and disruptions and distractions along the way. And that is why this program is unique because I am taking the position that if you bring all of yourself to your business goals right now and focus on building profitable relationships, you can knock them out of the park and retain a sense of integrity with the real you and what you originally intended to bring into the world. 00:09:11 Melissa: Instead of finding yourself in a place where you're at the whim of meta ads or you're at the whim of what everyone else has planned for business leaders around the world. So I invite you to go to MelissaLlarena.com forward slash network. I am excited about this program. I'm proud about this program. And I also cannot wait to hear what you hear, what you think about this week's episode. So enjoy the conversation, signing off, and check out all the resources in the show notes, MelissaLlarena.com forward slash network. Let's talk about how to make it work. For yourself as a mom who has an ambitious goal that you must achieve at the end of this year, and you have to also be a parent, a presence, a playful, a loving, and attention-giving mom. 00:10:03 Melissa: So I decided to bring along two podcast guests and this is somewhat of a new thing. This is a mashup. I have brought on this podcast episode, two leading ladies who are moms and business leader. So here's the thing, I've interviewed them before. So I'll include some of those clips in this episode. But first we have Zibby Owens. She is the CEO of Zibby Media. She was on episode 229. And we spoke about the missing leadership skills that are not taught in world-class business schools on that episode. Also in this episode, I have brought Liz Tenety, the co-founder of Motherly. And her and I spoke about these comparisons between launching and owning and scaling a business and scaffolding your family with support. So all of these reinforcements that we need to make things happen as moms with businesses. What I wanted to also do is interject my perspective here on how I personally have made it work over the course of 13 years. First starting out with a baby on my Ergo baby chest carrier at a sales meeting that I closed and my son also had a diaper blowout for. 00:11:29 Melissa: But then on top of that, being a mom now of three boys. So there was a time where then I had identical twins. So I wanna share my perspective as well in terms of how I have personally over the last 13 years, whether I've lived in the US or Australia, have made it work. Why do I do this? Why is it that I think these two voices and my own are so important in today's landscape of building a business? Having a family and feeling like you made a difference in your life and feeling like you accomplished your ultimate mission and found fulfillment with using the skills that you worked hard for in the real world and as a contribution to others. 00:12:14 Melissa: Here's why, because I want more of you. I want all of you. I want not just the mom in business to show up, you know, out there online, offline in the world, but I want the mom, the nurturer, the creative, the create tricks as a lot of them say, to go and show up bigger in the world because you're needed. There is no doubt in my mind that if you have an idea on your heart or you have already set your business in motion, that you were meant to lead the charge on that one endeavor and be an outstanding mom at the same time. So in this episode, what I'm going to do is share these different perspectives, one from Zibby Owens, the other from Liz Tenety, and then myself, your host, Melissa Llarena, so that you can make it work this year. Alrighty, here we go. 00:13:08 Melissa: So let's first listen to Zibby Owens. So I interviewed Zibby Owens, the CEO founder of Zibby Media in episode 229. And what I've done for you is just kind of curated the parts where we really got into the conversation of what was missing in terms of business school skills and lessons when it came to our realities of having children and building businesses at the same time. So this way you have context. I'm gonna go ahead and let you listen to that piece of the conversation, you could listen to the whole thing, 229, but I want you to listen to that portion of the conversation so that when you come back to me, you have a little bit of context. So go ahead and enjoy episode 229 with Zibby Owens. 00:14:05 Melissa: What would you say is the most valuable thing that you've learned as an entrepreneur, like doing it here in your space that you think should be taught in a business school? 00:14:14 Zibby: That's a great question. Because yes, I did take these things in business school and they, did they help me? Right, exactly. Like, I mean, honestly, I think they should teach you that you can watch a quick YouTube tutorial about literally anything and teach yourself how to do it. That is how I started a podcast. I was like, Google, you know, how to start a podcast. You know, how do I, you know, I watch videos all the time. Like we got locked out of the car the other day, and everyone's like, what should we do? And I was like, I'm sure there's a YouTube video about this. And like there was. So I think it's knowing that like there are so many experts in so many things that anything you wanna do, there is a guide. 00:14:59 Zibby: And now it's easier than ever to take people's advice and have them teach you. I think being open to learning and innovating, and this is something we learned is, you know, the ability to sort of shift gears and pay attention to market trends and da-da-da-da. Yeah, yeah, yeah. Like we learned that. But I feel like my cases in business school were like operational challenges and you know, the cranberry manufacturing and I was like, what? And then in our conversation, in our one class, it was called leadership, about all the ways that people led wrong. 00:15:42 Zibby: You know, and so I think about that, but I'm also like, I don't want to ever lead as the professional-only version of myself. Like, I've decided that the best way to lead is just to use myself, even if it's my mom's skills, in the workplace. Like, I feel like I lead as a mom, and I feel like it has only made me a better leader, and they don't talk about that at business school at all. There is something about like taking care of people and gathering people and the softer skills or moments. Like with my company, I decided like three days a week, we all like take a break and go and have a nice lunch together. Like every week, that's what we do. It's part of our culture. It's just like what we do. 00:16:29 Zibby: And I have them to my home and we sit around my dining room table and have lunch. And it's so nice. And it's like, I wanna take care of them. I want to treat my teammates like my most important dinner guests, because that's what they are. They are so important. And why would you treat an employee any differently than that? Like if you don't want to have them, if you don't feel like they deserve that, they probably then should not be working for you. Do you know what I mean? So, and leaving, like I leave every day at 2:30 and go pick up my kids. And I get it all done the rest of the day, but like, do I need to be in the office? So I just think there are so many things we could have learned about there are ways to make it work. 00:17:10 Zibby: And finding flexible environments and, leading by example and making it work. And, and then I guess just always, like, I think that businesses, leading a business is like raising a kid in that as soon as you feel like you have it down, everything changes, right? I've got it. And now suddenly they're a year older and I don't know what I'm doing again and none of the clothes fit. Like I have to start again, are you kidding me? And that's what it's like in business. Like things are constantly changing. Oh, okay, maybe it's an external change that's impacting the organization. Maybe it's an internal growth change, but we have to be ready to like run to the gap and get new clothes. 00:18:00 Melissa: It's so funny. I was just telling a client yesterday that using your imagination is like the perfect change management tool. Like, I mean, so many people that have businesses are able to just go from one thing to another quite quickly, you know, just really edit, change, refocus, and then not feel like, kind of like, I don't know, maybe it's just me. Like for me, I would kind of feel like, man, I did it wrong, embarrassed, you know, like I was going this way and now I'm like, no longer doing this thing. What people gonna think? 00:18:37 Melissa: You know, and so I think that's something else that stops you. And the same could be said when you're at a target and your kids have a meltdown and you have a choice. Be the mom that you intended to be in front of other people or care what they think and then be that another kind of mom. It's the parallels are striking between motherhood and entrepreneurship for sure.So on that point, I'm just curious, like can we name the superpower that you got from being a mom that you apply in business? What would you name that superpower? 00:19:13 Zibby: Being humble. 100%. The superpower is the ability to constantly learn and change, honestly. I mean, you have to constantly adapt to changing conditions as a mom. So adaptability. Yeah, I think, constantly being able to regroup, to do lots of things at once, and to deal with things that are ultimately out of your control, even when you care. 00:19:51 Melissa: Yeah, and that's when it's like the hardest, right? It's like when it's your heart, when it's your name, when it's, you know, the Zibby verse, right? It's different than if it were this third party entity. And I think we can close the conversation there because I think right now a lot of listeners are probably wondering to themselves, like, holy cow, maybe there is value in my, like, super regular mom life moments. Maybe I could write a story, right? 00:20:20 Zibby: So much value. So much value. 00:20:23 Melissa: So much value. And I think now the onus might be on people that have these, like, MBAs and things to put that value in, like, an income statement. Like, goodwill at least, right? Like, just, like, find a place to demonstrate that, you know, if we use the success markers of the world, like finances and money and all that, like how can we translate that to like real income, financial, you know, security for moms? I mean, I think the value is so clear. And so my hope, my intention is through your stories, Zibby, through this conversation that anyone listening feels like, you know what, heck yeah, I matter. I matter. And I think that's so true. Thank you so, so much, Zibby. This was amazing. 00:21:11 Melissa: When I was having that conversation with Zibby, it was resonating for me at a very, very... How should I put it? Honest level, right? And here's why, because when you go into the business world, when you're attending these world-class business schools, a lot of what's discussed ends up being irrelevant at times if you decide to launch your own business. And it certainly becomes impractical if you become a mom and you have a business. 00:21: 43 Melissa: And that is the reason why I wanted to really just hone in on the idea that Zibby attended world-class university, as did I, world-class business school as well. And we did not know that ultimately, when it came to building a business, and growing our respective families, it was really important to have and bring a sense of humility. You heard Zibby say that superpower that you have also as a mom. I mean, our kids humble us all the time. I would say I am constantly humbled and reminded that I am not in control of every single thing that my kids do or do not do. And that's something that is not taught in business schools, but it's something that we certainly appreciate and realize as moms. 00:22:31 Melissa: The other idea is this. So Zibby mentioned adaptability. And what I love about that is when I was coaching a former CEO of a huge city bike organization, she told me that the number one skill or characteristic of a successful entrepreneur is the ability to adapt, to be nimble. And isn't it interesting how, as a mom, we might not realize that that is a core skill that we learn, and if we don't learn it, we continue to reap the rewards of the lessons and ultimately can bring to the table if we do decide to launch a business or scale our business, or just live life as a mom. So I want you to just hone in on that idea that this is another superpower that is not realized and underutilized and not appreciated as a contribution. You can also give by way of your talent as a business owner. 00:23:29 Melissa: The third superpower that I wanted to just pull out cause I think it's so important is this idea of making peace that not everything is within your control. As a business owner, I will say this. When it comes to your business, if you literally have your name on the shingles, and I hope I'm saying that right, you honestly are going to take a lot of things personally because your name is on the line. Your reputation is on the line. When it comes to our children, and right now I'm noticing so many people going back to college or going to college, and it's like we're sharing all these successes, and maybe our kids went to these amazing schools. And again, it's personal. It's like, yeah, we were part of their success in getting in these amazing schools. 00:24:15 Melissa: Well, here's the thing, by way of your business, by way of what's within, what's outside of your control, it's really important to understand that there's an emotional residue on that. And here's what I mean by that. So when it comes to doing anything, like this video right here or this podcast, right? For me, what's outside of my control. What's outside of my control is that you will continue to listen. What's within my control is that I prepare for this conversation. And at the end of the day, it does matter to me because this is my voice, and this is what's on my heart and what I wanna share with you as a fellow mom founder. 00:24:51 Melissa: But it's something that I had to learn to let go of through the power of surrender. And as a mom, I think that is something that we constantly have to do. And as a business leader, it's mentally helpful because, really, relinquishing control is the name of the game when it comes to delegating. 00:25:12 Melissa: And it's also important when you've done everything in your power in order to make something successful. So that is another superpower that Zibby mentions in that snippet of the interview that I would love for you to just write down and say to yourself, "Yeah, I have that superpower, and it's because I am a mom." 00:25:32 Melissa: The other thing I wanted to just kind of reinforce is this idea. Zibby mentioned that she learned so many soft skills, leadership skills from being a mom to four children. And what I think is so amazing about that is when I had a conversation with Beth Comstock earlier, earlier on this podcast, and I'll put in the show notes all of these links, Beth mentioned that being a mom taught her to be more patient. So there's all these skills, all these superpowers that we have and bring as moms that I really wish we would be confident enough to bring to a professional setting so that we can get further along in our ambitions and we can make it work. 00:26:19 Melissa: So here's where I net with this. When it comes to navigating change, when it comes to experiencing uncertainty as a business leader, Zibby did say that motherhood, being a mom to a kid, oh my goodness, that is all about change, all about uncertainty. I'll give you a really tangible example, and Zibby mentioned this. 00:26:40 Melissa: So change, right? Let's say you go, you buy your child size four kids shoes. Well, chances are they're gonna grow out of it before you expected them to. And so again, now we go shoe shopping once more and find another pair of shoes. Same idea. Like, let's say you figured out how to have the two kids not rival, right? Sibling rivalry. And you figured out this great trick where you interrupted them. Okay, that's gonna work for a limited period of time. And then again, the next season of life, you have to figure that out again. So this is something that's common in motherhood. And this is something that is just the way business is done right now, given the speed of the world and given the fact that markets are changing all the time. I mean, put a post on Instagram, and you see that one week of certain type of post is gonna work very well and another week is gonna totally flock. So change. 00:27:31 Melissa: Again, something that, as a mom, we have to get very good at and we are very good at. We don't realize it's a superpower that we can bring to the table. And so my intention behind this conversation and next up we'll have another female leader that I admire who's a mom and share her perspective. But my intention here is this, I want you to just realize that you are a mom and you bring certain skills that are marketable as heck. And yeah, that's a businessy word. What do I mean by that? 00:28:00 Melissa: Valuable. They can add value as a business owner. And I don't want you to undersell yourself and say to yourself, well, that old thing, I just do that in my sleep. Because not everyone does what you do with such ease and with such ability to provide an impact. So please appreciate what you bring to the table. Again, this is gonna be part of my perspective on making it work. And I'm gonna tie it up at the end of this conversation. 00:28:29 Melissa: Next up we have Liz Tenety. She is the co-founder of Motherly. And I interviewed her on episode 243. And I'm gonna go ahead and let you listen to that snippet right now, and I would love to draw your attention to a couple of concepts. One idea is the following. 00:28:49 Melissa: We talked about how being a business owner and leader helped her be a better family leader, right? And she spoke about this notion of really figuring out your support system and the resources you need in place in order to achieve your biggest and boldest, and baddest dream. On top of that, she also mentioned how burnout, like you could be in the risk, at the risk of burnout, if you do not feel supported. And it's so interesting because this has almost like physical manifestations too. If you've ever had... This is so like Dr. Melissa, although I'm not a doctor, but if you ever had like lower back issues, like that could be like a sign that psychologically there's a lack of support there. 00:29:36 Melissa: So I turn this to Liz now. She's going to share how she thinks about scaffolding support around her family. And she's also going to share how she has learned how to be a better family leader because she is a business leader and how she has re-imagined time as a business leader and has translated the same concept into her family life alongside her husband so that they have a nice work-life integration. 00:30:07 Melissa: So that was a mouthful. Enjoy the conversation. It's just a snippet. If you want the entire conversation, that is episode 243. But at this time, I want you to just capture the essence of what we spoke about so that you can then have context about how you can make it work and what other sort of resources and learnings, and lessons you can apply to make your life wonderful, magnificent, and truly fulfilled both as a mom and a business owner. So go ahead and check out that conversation with Liz Tenety. 00:30:44 Liz: So I guess over the decade that I've been a mom and an entrepreneur, I've learned how to think really creatively about time. And all like working moms know that all of a sudden we can get a whole day's worth of work done in just a few hours. And that kind of may have seemed impossible before motherhood, but we just get this incredible focus. So I have been there. I mean, when I was a new working mom, I could not afford full-time childcare. So I had four hours in the morning, I had lunch with my son, and then I worked as hard as I could during his two-hour nap, right? So I kind of got to seven hours of work, working that way, just working around nap time. 00:31:28 Liz: I also have joined gyms where there's two hours of childcare and a little café that you can sit in. And so for like 200 bucks a month, you get two hours of childcare a day, whether or not you work out, which is a pretty great deal. YMCAs have free childcare and are really affordable in a lot of communities. So I would think I would not bat an eye at doing that. I've also heard of entrepreneur moms setting up childcare swaps with other entrepreneurs. So one mom takes the kids one day, another mom the next. 00:32:06 Melissa: I also just encourage people to think about what they really need help with. Cause sometimes I think, Do I really need more childcare and to spend $1,000 next week on full-time childcare? Or do I need to assign this project to my VA or hire someone on Upwork to get this job done, right? I also think looking at the weekends, which can often get taken over by kid activities, but my husband and I are working hard now to make sure that we each have designated time on the weekends to ourselves so that we can recover a little bit from the week and be able to be more intentional with our kids. So I guess not that I have an easy answer, but trying to think really creatively about your team, your time, where to find really dedicated pockets of time. 00:32:59 Liz: Lastly, I work from home. I've worked full-time from home for 12 years since becoming a mom. But this afternoon, I'm going to a cafe because, talk about this space-time continuum, I can somehow be so much more creative and productive when I can put my headphones on and get a latte and sit down and crank workout in a cafe environment. That energy is really good for me creatively. And so again, it is about energy, it is about time, it is about money, and all those things kind of intersect and just encouraging people to use their creativity. 00:33:34 Liz: Also, ChatGPT is blowing my mind every single day. And so when I have thorny questions of how do I solve this weird problem that I've never even talked to someone about, ChatGPT is surprising me with what it's able to suggest. So even AI tools and things like that are able to kind of introduce serendipity into our lives when we realize that no great company is built alone. 00:34:00 Liz: And in a lot of ways for me, I learned better how to run my family and think about what it means to lead a family by running a company and seeing no one can... I can't scale a startup by myself. I need talent to be in their zone of genius, and we need to work together on a shared mission, and that over time is how I've tried to operate our family more and more intentionally, learning from running my company. 00:34:25 Melissa: I love that. That's the opposite direction or the other direction that Zibby Owens suggested. So Zibby Owens was on Mom Founder Imagination Hub, and she was saying how being a stay at home mom has helped her build out her business and the Zibby-verse, right? So that's like one direction. And then now you are sharing how it helps in the opposite direction too, right? So founding the business, building the business, being a mom. 00:34:55 Melissa: And I feel like I'm kind of in between because I literally launched my business with my firstborn on my chest. Like, I went to that first sales meeting with my baby in my Ergobaby, and he had a diaper blowout, and I closed the sale. But you know, Manhattan is all the better for that experience in that moment. But I love this, I love this. And you know what? You have a fertile imagination, to say the least. 00:35:24 Melissa: I really enjoyed that conversation myself when I was speaking with Liz because of a couple of reasons. For me, what resonated was this realization that it can go both ways. Like I was reminded, and you heard that in the conversation, I was reminded of the conversation I had with Zibby Owens, episode 229, when Zibby had mentioned she learned how to be a very nurturing and effective people leader because she was a mom and she was a better leader for it. And so when I brought that back into the conversation with Liz, something sparked inside of me, which was, I should really do this mashup for listeners cause I think there's value in providing a different layer or lens to a former conversation. 00:36:09 Melissa: So with Liz's points, I wanted to just highlight these ideas. And it's this notion of thinking about time differently. So as a business leader, I will say that the amount of work that I've been able to pull off has been sensational in terms of my leverage of AI and my leverage of resources on different freelancing websites. And I have had to make peace with the fact that, okay, there's not this, catch 22, make money first, and then pay for launch campaign materials to be created. There has to be a place where I'm confident enough to take a risk in myself, knowing full well that I can make it work. So once I spend the money, I can then find a way to make it a profitable endeavor. 00:37:03 Melissa: And thinking about time in that fashion is quite amazing because Liz shared that you might need to pay for resources just to prevent you getting into burnout. And isn't that worthy enough and as worthy as any other investment in your business and in your mom life? 00:37:26 Melissa: The other thing I wanted to just say in terms of time and in terms of talent, which is what Liz pointed to, was this idea that there are resources available for you out there. And what I have found is that oftentimes, there's this hesitation. It's kind of like, What will people think? Or this hesitation of, I could really do that if I just sacrifice my sleep or I sacrifice my weekend. And yeah, you absolutely can do a lot of things because you've made things work in the past. However, there have been consequences. And so on that note, I think what Liz was sharing, which is this notion of scaffolding. And being someone from New York City, I just imagine blue scaffolding everywhere in Manhattan. I think it's important to consider that as part of your wellness plan. I think it's part of your business building endeavor. I think that is how you make it work. 00:38:27 Melissa: It's not about working yourself and white knuckling. In order for you to work, you need to have the resources in place in order to have the bandwidth to include things like conversations with prospective clients, to include things like networking. So there's a lot of things that go into building a business that you can translate into how you manage and navigate family life. And Liz called this out, but I, in my work, as far as using my framework, my method, which is called the 'Imagination to Impact Income Method', a lot of what I have to do is carve totally new paths because the reality is while today, this Melissa right here, who is speaking right into your ear, I am totally in a different spot than I was as a younger Melissa. 00:39:25 Melissa: I wasn't raised into a family with so many resources and access to so many influential human beings. And in this conversation, it's evidence of the fact that I've had to open doors, ask for doors to be open, go through windows. I mean, God knows what I've had to do in order to secure conversations with people like Zibby Owens and Liz Tenety. But at the same time, I've also had to figure out for myself how to create or build scaffolding around my family and not feel shame or embarrassment because no one else in my family has done the same thing. So there's a lot, a lot, a lot that I could go through in terms of Tenety's or in terms of Liz's recommendations. 00:40:13 Melissa: But I wanted to just point out that idea that if you do not feel supported, that can lead to burnout. And Liz also mentioned earlier in the conversation of 243 that for her, it meant friendships. And that's something that I'm working on myself because I've moved quite a bit. So that's something that is on my top priority list right now as well. 00:40:36 Melissa: So I just shared with you two conversations that I had with two leading ladies in this business world who have kids, right? So Zibby has four kids, Liz has five kids, and I have three. And I will say that I wanted to share with you my perspective on how to make it work. So here, over the course of the last 13 years, having had at first one child to then three, because I've identical twins, so it happened in one fell swoop. This is how I have been able to make it work. And this is something that I'm pulling in from those two conversations, both Zibby and Liz. And also the fact that I've spoken to 240 people on this podcast with different perspectives on how they have been able to make anything work. 00:41:28 Melissa: So point number one, and I'll just give you three big, big ideas here. So the first one is that we need to do a better job of resourcing ourselves. We have almost everything that we need right under our noses. And I think in terms of being a mom, this is something that we don't even think about and it's not our fault at all because it's not a topic of conversation. 00:41:58 Melissa: It's, no one is telling me, hey, Melissa, did you realize that...your son is really good at Canva and he could actually help you whip up a nice little slide to share all the PR that you've gotten in the last 13 years, whereas you right now are banging your head on a computer trying to figure out how to make a slide pretty. Like no one is telling me this, but guess what? This summer, my eldest, I had him intern for me and that's actually something that he helped me do in like milliseconds, right? 00:42:33 Melissa: So resourcing ourselves, how to make it work is point number one. We have so much available to us as moms. Here's something that is so important that I think is never talked about. We talk about our kids' imaginations, right? And so it's this lovely thing that we just say, wow, they have the ability to like, imagine themselves as pirates and the floor is lava, et cetera. But what...what if, what if, what if that imagination that our kids have can serve us in our businesses? What if hanging out with your kids can be part of your competitive advantage, a business strategy so that you can come up with a better business idea or something more innovative, certainly something that is simpler to describe, right? 00:43:23 Melissa: What if that were possible? So resourcing yourself and knowing that you have resources. Also our kids, what do they do for us? They ground us. You heard Zibby about humility, they ground us. If you forgot who you really are, hang out with your kids and they will quickly remind you that you are a mom. So they ground us. And isn't it interesting how if we feel stress or anxiety and we go and ask a child for a hug as an example, typically we will feel a sense of calm, a sense of joy, a sense of love. So isn't that interesting? We have resources that we're not using enough. 00:44:02 Melissa: The other thing is this philosophy that, you know, we're able to make anything work for our kids. Isn't it interesting how, if we're able to make anything work for our kids, then you could apply the same skill, the same notion, the same idea to make things work for ourselves. Yet we seldom do that. We seldom do that, right? We could pull out all the stops for our kids, but then when it comes to ourselves, why is it that we don't leverage the same resources? 00:44:29 Melissa: So, you know, I think it's really important for me to also say this. As I've spoken with people from around the world, and this is a global conversation because having witnessed a library filled of kids and tired moms in Australia, and the same set up in the US with my own kids and libraries here, I know that a lot of us have similar emotions running through our bodies. And I know that a lot of us have a lot of superpowers as well. And when I've spoken to all these people on my podcast, what I have realized is the following three ideas, which is that these resources I mentioned before and superpowers that we spoke about earlier, both Liz mentioned superpowers and then also Zibby did as well. They're so underutilized, so underutilized. 00:45:16 Melissa: And it's, Again, not your fault because no one is having this conversation. No one is telling you hug your child and reduce your anxiety in that instance. No one is saying that. Here's the second thing. You have a gear. I have a gear. We all have gears, but here's the challenge. We don't have a lot of energy right now. And that I would say is such an impediment. And I think needs to be a priority when it comes to building a business, building a family and making anything work. The other idea is the following. 00:45:46 Melissa: So in terms of asking, making bold asks, asking for help, being around people who are light years ahead of you in terms of mentorship, I think we need to do a better job of asking more boldly. We need to do a better job of asking for what we want. Sometimes even being totally irrational and like just out of control, outrageous. If you don't ask for what you need and what you want, and I mean, for real, I'm not saying like mouse around the topic, then you are a 100% not going to get the support that you need, the sense of belonging that you want, the connection that we all long for, and the support, again, it's worth saying twice, that is necessary for any mom who wants to build a business and also be the leader of her family. 00:46:35 Melissa: And so I wanted to just kind of wrap it up right there. I just shared with you both Liz's perspective on scaffolding your family and what she learned as a business leader that she applies to her family and what Zibby has learned as a mom. She was a stay at home mom before for years in terms of building her business and being a nurturing people leader who wants to have dinner conversations with her team. 00:47:02 Melissa: And for me, I think all of this, all of this comes to this one conclusion. It is important for you to understand that you can bring your whole self to the table. And I don't care about what that table looks like or where that table is situated, whether it is a boardroom, it is a investor meeting, it is a PTA, if that is the correct way of saying it these days. 00:47:29 Melissa: I think it is so important to bring the whole of you to the table because, because as a mom with a business, that is your competitive advantage. If you can sit in a boardroom, if you can sit in an investor meeting and have the confidence necessary to, as a very tangible example, bring up a scenario that makes sense. It's a testament to your character, a small talk during an investor meeting that comes from your mom life category bucket and maybe break through, you know, the conversation with bringing a more human perspective to how you will serve your prospective clients, you might stand out and you might get that funding, right? 00:48:10 Melissa: Here's the other idea in terms of bringing the whole of you, not just one part of you to any table as a business leader and as a mom. Let's just imagine that you're out there on the soccer field and you're doing your mom thing this weekend, and you overhear a conversation where it's a business conversation. What's stopping you from interjecting your perspective in that business conversation? You could be the difference between an insight that produces millions of dollars for that person versus an insight that gets lost and taken by a competition or a competitor. 00:48:46 Melissa: So, I don't want you to feel like you have to pretend you're not a mom. I don't want you to feel like you don't have something to bring to the table because it's been a couple of years since you've been out of the market. There's no reason for it except our own narrative that we're telling ourselves in our minds. And I want to be sure that you have the support that you need, the resources you need, and a new perspective, a fresh perspective on how to actually achieve what you want this year. 00:49:14 Melissa: On that note, I want to invite you, from my mom in business heart to your mom in business heart to really, really invest in yourself. I am producing a nine week live coaching program for mom founders. It is getting started very, very soon. You're going to see social media all over about it. I want you to get on my email list and be sure that you are aware of the resources available to you, a mom founder, and the better way to actually achieve business growth, and the better way to actually make whatever goal you have from a business perspective this year doable at the end of the year, and doable with the energy that you need, and doable without neglecting anyone, anyone including yourself, your family or anyone else that you care for. 00:50:13 Melissa: So the program name is called Fertile Imagination to Networking Success. I wanna be sure that I share with you everything that is available in this program. Here's the trick. You are only needed for three hours each week. That is what my clients who have participated in this nine week group coaching program have shared with me. They've...only had to put in about three hours of their week, hours, every single week in order to get phenomenal results. 00:50:47 Melissa: During this program, what happens is the following. We're going to walk through the imagination to impact to income method for you, a mom in business, and the focus where we're gonna apply all our imagination, our expansive thinking is in building profitable relationships. I want to just say that if I had a flag that I could just put on the moon and I could say, this is my flag and this is what matters and this is what I think really works for moms in business, it is the ability to network proactively and network in a way that's not sleazy but is totally genuine and value add into directions. 00:51:30 Melissa: Because I believe that the stronger our bonds are with people outside of our current circles, the stronger, the better off our kids will be when they have a business idea they wanna execute, when they feel alone in a country and they've studied abroad and you know someone in Oslo, when they you know, want to see someone else's perspective, someone else who has been there. So I don't see building profitable relationships and networking and what I teach over the course of the nine weeks as a purely transactional business skill. I see it as a legacy building resource that will give and give and give and give. 00:52:11 Melissa: Over the course of nine weeks, what will happen is every single week, we would go through a topic that is important in terms of coming up with a better story to tell, finding the right people to connect with, finding where they are and knowing what to say when you're in front of them. 00:52:26 Melissa: Also, we cover the art of asking better questions so that this way you are completely in a place of an optimized conversation that gets the ball rolling in terms of your business growth or whatever your objective might be. Also, I've included the opportunity to really work on imposter syndrome. Here's why I think that's important and why it's different than anything I've seen in the past. Imposter syndrome, I even did a LinkedIn poll. I asked, "does it ever go away?" I got a 100% no. Impostor syndrome does not go away according to everyone polled on LinkedIn. And that is the reason why as a mom, what I have noticed is you could be the baddest person in the boardroom. The moment you become a mom, I don't know what comes over us, but all our insecurities just kind of like emerged to the top of our brain. 00:53:19 Melissa: And what happens is that they're very hard to get rid of when you're in business. Like, let's say you just, just, just, you know, had a really tough conversation with your child and now you're walking into an investment conversation. It's no wonder you're gonna feel a little bit like a fraud, a little bit uncomfortable and awkward and insecure if you just had that moment with your teen or tween. And that is why in my group coaching program, so this way you get confident enough to have conversations with high profile prospective clients or collaborators or partners or even podcast guests, I've ensured that you have a resource, a method to actually navigate imposter syndrome for what it is in the moment and in your reality as a mom. 00:54:07 Melissa: Because that has been something that has made us very stoppable during situations when we have had to be unstoppable in order to get real business growth in a short period of time. In this group coaching program, I also have here bonuses. So I've collaborated with other mom founders who have been in business for quite some time. And I've had them create exclusive bonuses just for us, those participants in that nine week group coaching program, where you will have an opportunity to literally learn how to be more bold in terms of your communication skills and be more bold in terms of the things that you ask help with and for. 00:54:46 Melissa: You will also, as way of you know, ensuring that you are successful during this program, you will also have an opportunity to know how to get things off your plate because here's the reality of the matter. When it comes to everything that you have lodged in your mind for things that you have to do, chances are you don't have to actually do them all. That's just like a fun secret there. And so I wanted to bring in an expert who's gonna help you take things off your plate so you can add this group coaching program to the plate or frankly, anything you desire to do with that extra time. 00:55:20 Melissa: And I've also brought in a hilarious, and I know LinkedIn and hilarious doesn't necessarily get spoken of in the same sentence, but I've brought in a hilarious LinkedIn presence expert who's a mom as well, and who shared what's necessary when it comes to having a positive first impression by way of your LinkedIn presence. Because a lot of the work that we would do in the group coaching program will, will include reaching out to people to connect with them and turn them from contacts to connections for the long term to support your business. And so a lot of that will include some LinkedIn activity. So I wanna be sure that you're set up for success. 00:55:59 Melissa: So at this time, if this program, Fertile Imagination to Networking Success is something that you know you need because maybe you've been in business for a year, two or three or five or six or more, and you have come to this place where you need that push. Like at this point, it's like you need to get from whatever gear you're into another in order to meet your year end goals, then I encourage you right now to go to melissallarena.com/network You can absolutely ask me anything. I'm available via DM on Instagram. All of this is in the show notes. I am also available via email and that will be in the show notes. Do you know where show notes are? If you're looking at this, then you're gonna see it in the description of YouTube. But if you're listening to me, you're gonna see this on your device, your cell phone in the description area of iTunes or Spotify. 00:56:53 Melissa: So go ahead and reach out to me and ask me anything because there's a timeline. You will only be able to make a decision on participating in this group coaching program Fertile Imagination to Networking Success until September 27th at 5 P.M. Central Standard Time. That is it. That is when there is no more opportunity to enter this group coaching program where you will have the support that you need from like-minded mom founders because it's a group coaching program. Where you will have a new way of growing business, which is through the art of profitable relationship building using my method, which works for us moms who need to carve a path that we have never seen before. 00:57:35 Melissa: So, go ahead and go to melissallarena.com/network If this conversation really, really got you thinking about how you want to design your mom life in business, I wanna hear from you today. I really wanna hear from you today. So go ahead, reach out to me. Again, Instagram is a very easy way to do so, Melissa Llarena. 00:57:57 Melissa: And definitely I hope that this conversation inspires you to realize that you can make it work, you can make it work. If you heard it from Zibby, if you heard it from Liz, and now if you're hearing it from me, you can make it work. And I don't want you to feel like you don't have any support. I don't want you to feel like you don't have everything it takes in terms of credentials and resources. And I don't want you to feel like you have to, you know…reinvent the wheel because I have a method that I can teach you to use the imagination to impact income method and I have a way to actually take you from how you feel right now about your business building activities, maybe you're in a plateau to achieving a remarkable growth spurt by the end of this year and beyond and here's something that I don't tell anyone, you know these skills that I'm teaching you in this nine week group coaching experience. 00:58:58 Melissa: I've even taught them to my kids as well. And I know that if that's one thing that I can feel really, really comfort in, it's that, that they will know how to go from contact to connection with anyone in the world, and they will always have people around them who wanna be part of their success story. And on my end, I would be honored to be part of your success story. 00:59:26 Melissa: So go ahead, learn about the program, melissallarena.com/network and reach out to me should you have any questions. If you're listening to this on iTunes or Spotify, definitely just hit that follow button or be sure to hit that I want to hear episodes every Tuesday button. However, my read today, do that because that makes our relationship official, kind of like going from casual dating to like, oh no, now we're boyfriend and girlfriend, but like, you know, podcast format. 00:59:59 Melissa: If you're on YouTube and you're watching me and if you're looking at these earrings, these are like circle earrings. I wore these earrings when I interviewed Gary Vaynerchuk and he actually commented on them. Fun fact, that was episode 10. Then I encourage you to hit the subscribe button because once you subscribe to this channel, then every Tuesday you will get a brand new episode.Also, I encourage you to hit the bell. You're gonna see a bell there. And that bell is just gonna notify you when something is new. 01:00:27 Melissa: And I also want you to just know that by following me, by subscribing, like you're encouraging me. You are giving me the confidence and the desire to put on makeup, right? This is YouTube. And you're also giving me the confidence and the desire to like...have all the guts I can to invite people like Liz and like Zibby on this podcast. And it takes guts and it takes energy, but I'm energized by your support. I am so energized by your support. 01:00:57 Melissa: So if you're interested in the group coaching experience, again, doors absolutely closed September 27th at 5 P.M. Central Standard Time. Just go to melissallarena.com/network and I hope you got a lot of out of this conversation. Thank you so much.
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248: 3.5 Months to Go: Introducing a Better Way to Achieve Year-End Business Goals Without the Burnout
Hey there, amazing moms and dream chasers! This week, I opened up about my journey as a mom and entrepreneur, and I can't wait for you to dive in. We're chatting about why keeping your energy and momentum high is key, especially as we near the year's end. I'll share my go-to tips for handling the distractions and pressures that come with balancing mom life and business. Plus, get ready for some savvy strategies to craft a year-end networking plan that helps you build valuable connections without zapping your energy. From my quest to become a top Amazon bestseller to my dream interviews with big names like Gary Vaynerchuk and Suzy Batiz, I'm here to prove that you can totally chase your dreams while still rocking your mom role. Don't miss out on this fun and insightful episode! Plus, discover Never-Before-Shared Secrets I've Used to Help Moms Like You Tailor Success to Your Business and Family! Join My FREE LIVE Masterclass on September 23, and also 24th exclusively for Mom Business Owners—Sign Up Today!" Master Your Year-End Networking: Build Profitable Relationships For Business Growth in 30 Days Without Burnout: https://www.melissallarena.com/masterclass/ In this episode, you will hear: How to keep your unique essence of both a mom and business leader while going after those big entrepreneurial goals. The real talk on the hurdles we face and how to tackle them. Why staying pumped and on track is a game-changer for hitting your goals. Tips for building awesome relationships without draining your energy and avoiding burnout. How to ditch those self-doubts and own your business superpowers. Why having a clear picture of your goals is crucial for both business and personal success. How to stay healthy and happy while juggling motherhood and entrepreneurship. The power of community and collaboration among moms in business. We're halfway through September, and if the thought of the months ahead is draining your energy, stick with me—I'm going to show you how to stay energized and finish this year strong. Avoiding burnout is the name of the game and I have found a solid way that is rarely discussed. What if I told you that profitable networking is not just another task on your to-do list, but actually the most energy-efficient way to grow your business and finish the year strong? Hey, everyone! Before we dive in, as promised all the details about my masterclass are here—in the show notes. If you're ready to take action now, just head over to www.melissallarena.com/masterclass to sign up. But first, a message from our sponsors i.e. This episode is brought to you by: Master Your Year-End Networking: Build Profitable Relationships For Business Growth in 30 Days Without Burnout: https://www.melissallarena.com/masterclass/ A LIVE one-hour masterclass for visionary mom business owners: Close the year strong with the proven "Imagination to Impact to Income Method™" to manage time, energy, and stay focused through gatekeeper-free networking. 👉The key to rapid business growth spurts for mom business founders is a clear focus on building business networking relationships that pack a punch, allowing you to achieve maximum results in your limited time. Join me to craft your own focused year-end networking strategy that you'll actually execute. We'll unleash creative thinking for both your strategic approach and ways to keep your energy high, not drained! Now, let's talk about (Mom)entum—a word that starts with "mom" for a reason. We all need it to hit those big business breakthroughs. But let's be honest, this year feels a bit more challenging than the last. I've been running my coaching practice for 13 years now, and trust me, I've seen how unpredictable things can get, especially during a political season. Between the craziness of creating endless content to feed the social media machines and the competition heating up as everyone scrambles to hit their year-end goals, it's easy to feel drained. And let's not forget all the other demands on our "mom" time from now until December. Seriously, who's in charge of everyone else's calendar? Finding the energy to keep going—and maintain that momentum—is tough, especially for us moms running a business. But here's the thing: managing your energy is key. It determines whether you achieve your goals or settle for less than what you secretly want. Early in my business journey, I realized I didn't have to sacrifice my vision if I could find the most energy-efficient path to boost my credibility, expand my reach, and earn greater income. Instead of relying on ads or algorithms, I focused on building profitable relationships—a much more reliable path to income. And that's when I developed my Imagination to Impact to Income Method™. It all starts in an unlikely place for moms—our imagination. It's the most untapped source of energy for adults, and our kids know it well. I've used it to achieve tangible goals like becoming a #1 bestseller, landing incredible podcast guests like GaryVee and Suzy Batiz, getting featured in major media like the Wall Street Journal, and hitting five-figure months—all while being a mom. This is exactly why I want to invite you to my masterclass, "Master Your Year-End Networking: Build Profitable Relationships For Business Growth in 30 Days Without Burnout." I'll be giving you a step-by-step roadmap so you know you're doing the right things to get and keep the attention of even the busiest high-profile contacts. You'll stay moving forward, even if you've struggled with impostor syndrome. Plus, you'll discover an energy source you never imagined possible—one inspired by your mission and your kids! This is the same method that has worked wonders for me. In this masterclass, you'll learn how to: Reimagine your company vision to energize you so you can exceed your 2024 goals and still have the energy to thoroughly enjoy the holidays. Find a clear relationship-building focus for your business, allowing you to harness your energy on things that have a longer-lasting impact than those 5-second posts that disappear into the void. Navigate impostor syndrome proactively and become unstoppable, sparing yourself the energy drain of feeling bad about what's actually a normal feeling. So, pick a date and time that works for you, and you'll automatically be registered: September 23 at 12 pm CST September 23 at 7 pm CST September 24 at 10 am CST Remember, all the information is in the show notes, and you can sign up right now at www.melissallarena.com/masterclass. P.S. Show up LIVE to my free class and you will get a BONUS 30-Day Profitable Networking Action Plan and Tracker that connects your vision to daily actions! It's a smart, actionable, and mom-friendly planner to map out your 30-day networking activities to keep you focused on the right things. It also sees to it that you replenish your energy to prevent burnout. EXTRA bonus for showing up LIVE is that you will be entered into a drawing to be a podcast guest on the Mom Founder Imagination Hub. Can't wait to see you there! About Melissa Llarena Melissa is a bestselling author (learn more on www.fertileideas.com), imagination coach behind the Fertile Imagination to Networking Success Group Coaching Program, consultant, speaker, contributor to ForbesWomen articles that have garnered 4 million-plus views, and the podcast host of the Mom Founder Imagination Hub. Featured guests include GaryVee, Beth Comstock, Suzy Batiz, David Meltzer, and hundreds of other unconventional thinkers. Melissa has been featured in the WSJ, Business Insider, Fox Business, CNN Money, The Huffington Post, and other publications. She holds a psychology degree from NYU, an MBA from the Tuck School of Business at Dartmouth, and a Transformational Coaching Academy certificate and is training to become a meditation practitioner. Melissa lives in Austin, Texas, with her husband and three sons (one singleton and a set of identical twins). Quotes, that can change your perspective: "So here's what I realized. I didn't want to dilute my dreams. I also never wanted to amputate myself and pretend I am not a mom. It is integral to my identity. I am both and more." "But one thing I do know is that we need momentum to achieve business growth without feeling burnout and seldom do we feel that lift because we have so many things coming at us, grabbing and vying for our attention." "And not just like responsibilities, we're talking about things that at our cellular level, we feel it. Like we know, when we're not paying attention to what matters." SHARE this episode and boost to finish the year strong! Dive into the tips and strategies that will help you stay energized and rock your business goals. Head over to www.melissallarena.com/masterclass to sign up and get the step-by-step roadmap to building profitable relationships. Let's harness that (Mom)entum and make the rest of this year your best yet! Supporting Resources: Schedule a free call to see if Fertile Imagination to Networking Success my signature program is the right fit: https://www.melissallarena.com/sessions/ Podcast: Mom Founder Imagination Hub: https://www.melissallarena.com/podcast/ Instagram: https://www.instagram.com/MelissaLlarena/ Or, grab for free your copy of the "From Contact to Connection: The Mompreneur's Go-First Networking & Follow Up Playbook": https://witty-thinker-2643.ck.page/21e52edb87 Subscribe and Review Have you subscribed to my podcast for new moms who are entrepreneurs, founders, and creators? I'd love for you to subscribe if you haven't yet. I'd love it even more if you could drop a review or 5-star rating over on Apple Podcasts. Simply select "Ratings and Reviews" and "Write a Review" then a quick line with your favorite part of the episode. It only takes a second and it helps spread the word about the podcast for writer moms. TRANSCRIPT 00:00:00 Melissa: I didn't want to dilute my dreams. I also never wanted to amputate myself and pretend I am not a mom. It is integral to my identity. I am both and more. Don't get me started on my zodiac sign, which is a Gemini. And so for me, I didn't wanna change what I wanted to pursue. I wanted to be a number one Amazon bestseller. I wanted to have Gary Vaynerchuk on this podcast in episode 10. I wanted to interview Suzy Batiz, the inventor of Poo-Pourri. And so for me, I had to figure out another way because I wasn't gonna let go of my mom obligations. 00:00:43 Melissa: Welcome to the Mom Founder Imagination Hub, your weekly podcast to inspire you to dream bigger. Plan out how you're gonna get to that next level in business, find the energy to keep going, and make sure your creative juices are flowing so that this way you get what you really want rather than having to settle. Get ready to discover how Mom Founders have reimagined entrepreneurship and motherhood. Ever wonder how they do it? Tune in to find out and stretch yourself by also learning from diverse entrepreneurs who might not be moms, but who have lessons you can tailor about how you can disrupt industries and step way outside of your comfort zone. I believe every mom's superpower is her imagination. In this podcast, I'm gonna give you the mindset, methods, and tools to unleash yours. Sounds good? Then keep listening. 00:01:36 Melissa: We are halfway through September. Like where does the time go? I mean, for me, this is the moment in the year where I start to really reevaluate how I want to achieve my year end goals. And maybe that's the same for you. And we're gonna talk about the number one way that I've been able to really figure out how to get some energy, maintain my energy through the end of the year and knock out my business goals. Alrighty, so before I say anything, I just wanna be really upfront. If you're watching me on YouTube, you're gonna see, I might be referring to some notes because today's episode is ultra important. 00:02:21 Melissa: And yeah, I might look a little bit like a newscaster, but bear with me because I promise you that this conversation can change your life, your destiny, and the way that you get to the end of this year. Alrighty, so here we go. I wanted to just also say that in the show notes, I'm going to be mentioning the same URL that if you're watching on YouTube, you're going to see right underneath me, MelissaLlarena.com forward slash masterclass. So you'll be able to absolutely sign up for what I'm about to share with you right in the show notes, wherever you're listening or watching this episode. 00:02:59 Melissa: Alright, so now let's get to something that I realized just, I would say, two years ago. This word, momentum, have you noticed, if you look at the word, it starts with mom. And oftentimes, as a mom, it is really hard to gather the energy and maintain the energy to get to the end of the year. And there's a lot of reasons why, but one thing I do know is that we need momentum and seldom do we feel that lift because we have so many things coming at us, grabbing and vying for our attention, especially now through December. And so I also started thinking, okay, what's different about this particular year? 00:03:49 Melissa: Here we go. This is a political year. It's the year where if you wanted to pour all your effort to ad spend, you're going to be paying more for ads because we have a lot of campaigning going on. This is also a time when we can get lost in trying to figure out, once again, how to really take advantage of the algorithms on social media. And I'm not even going to get into the fact that now Google might be changing the way that you can get that SEO juice on our business. Don't even get me started because that's another change that I've heard and I'm just not here for it. This is not my Melissa has to figure out something new era And if you feel the same way Definitely pay close attention to what I'm about to say. 00:04:40 Melissa: So, you know, I've been in business for 13 years and I have noticed a lot of people who started when I did let's say 2013 or 2011 now and they might look very far ahead of me like any given year, if you were to look at like Louis Howes, or if you looked at, you know, Rami Sethi, or anyone who's killing it online, and I just mentioned men, but there are women too, moms specifically, like they just seem to be like nailing it hard every single year. And as a mom, and maybe you can relate, it's really hard to keep up that pace if you are also in the middle of growing your family. 00:05:24 Melissa: Maybe you have other ambitions and you relocated to another country. Maybe for you, you have a child that has different abilities and you have to go to a lot of medical appointments. Like we got a lot of stuff coming out at us that make us different than other people who might not have the same sense of responsibilities. And not just like responsibilities, we're talking about things that at our cellular level, we feel it. Like we know, when we're not paying attention to what matters. And so that's why I wanted to just share with you something that I realized over the last 13 years, having had my coaching practice and being a mom to three little boys, identical twins in that mix. 00:06:08 Melissa: So here's what I realized. I didn't want to dilute my dreams. I also never wanted to amputate myself and pretend I am not a mom. It is integral to my identity. I am both and more. Don't get me started on my zodiac sign, which is a Gemini. And so for me, I didn't wanna change what I wanted to pursue. I wanted to be a number one Amazon bestseller. I wanted to have Gary Vaynerchuk on this podcast in episode 10. I wanted to interview Suzy Batiz, the inventor of Poo-Pourri. And so for me, I had to figure out another way because I wasn't gonna let go of my mom obligations. And that's exactly why I came up with a method after a lot of trial and error and walking my clients through the same concept that is called the imagination to impact to income method. Here's the thing. 00:07:12 Melissa: What I realized was integral to actually getting to where I wanted to get to at any point of the year, in any season of motherhood, was this idea that I needed to use my imagination. And if you read my book, I refer to it as a fertile imagination, which is the ability to envision something you may have never seen a mom do before, certainly not in your circles, which is why I've had to go outside of my circles. Because I can't say I was raised in a community of mom podcasters or mom authors. 00:07:45 Melissa: So for me, this is completely new territory and I didn't want to bump and save myself along the way. And what I realized also in that method, it is something that other moms can go through and repeat and tailor for themselves. 00:08:03 Melissa: And the place where I have put this method to the best use, when it comes to my business growth goals and my ability to be a present mom, has been in what I call 'profitable networking.' You know how everyone else is chasing after, as I mentioned the algorithm, or join those ads, or trying to figure out, like, what's hot and heavy in terms of content marketing these days? Well, I have been on my end, building relationships with some of the most beautiful and most powerful individuals in the world. 00:8:38 Melissa: I mean, you could just check out my guest list on this very podcast. And I've used my method in order to secure those relationships in a genuine and authentic and long-lasting way where there's value on both ends, where I bring my whole self to the table. I don't pretend I'm not a mom. I am both, and I am myself. And I might even crack some jokes to build that rapport with individuals. So here's where I'm going with this. This method is something that I want to share with you. I wanna tell you all about it. And today, right now, this moment is a big one. Are you ready for it? All right, get listening'. 00:9:26 Melissa: I wanna invite you to my masterclass. This is the name of the masterclass, 'How to Craft a Focus Year-End Networking Strategy to Build Profitable Relationships in 30 Days.' And here's the thing, you can do that and be drained at the end of the year. But no, in this masterclass, here's the big difference. I'm gonna teach you how to do this without, without draining your finite mom energy. 00:09:56 Melissa: What if you get to the end point of this year feeling exhilarated and enthusiastic? Because enthusiasm, you need that if you're having these amazing conversations with prospective investors, clients, partners, podcast guests, you name it, right? So that is gonna be core to what I'm going to teach you during this live and free master class for mom founders. 00:10:20 Melissa: So here's the thing, here's what's gonna happen during the actual live masterclass. And attending live is going to have its rewards, listen for them. But here's what we're gonna do. So I'm gonna give you a step-by-step roadmap. So this way you know that you're doing the right things, right? And also, so this way you know what it takes to get the attention of even the busiest, high profile contacts. Because a lot of the times you're one relationship away from true business growth. 00:10:52 Melissa: And I mean, for me, it's happened on several occasions. One business relationship away from being a best seller, one business relationship away from moving to Australia where we expatted as a family, you name it, you could be one conversation away from changing your life. And I wanna help you understand how to position yourself during this live masterclass on September 23rd. 00:11:18 Melissa: Check out the link in the show notes. Check out the link under my face, if you're looking on YouTube. Sign up right now. Okay, so here's what else we are going to do. You're gonna understand how to do the impossible, even if you feel like a fraud. You know, imposter syndrome, I did a poll on LinkedIn the other day and I asked, does it ever go away? It was unanimous. Everyone said, "No, it does not go away." So why are we trying to suppress that feeling? I'm gonna teach you a method that has worked for me that's part of my own overarching method, imagination to impact income method that helps me do things even if I feel nervous or awkward or weird, or just like I'm not made for that just yet, right? I don't have all the credentials. 00:12:10 Melissa: So you're gonna learn that also in the masterclass, and 'focus'. That is the third idea. That is a third really big idea that as a mom, we need to figure out. Because if we are not in control of where we place our attention, where we place our focus, then everyone else is going to grab your attention and distract you. So that is important if you really want to make strides in terms of your goals at the end of this year and beyond, okay? While not draining your mom energy. That is the biggest, biggest difference. While not draining your mom energy because there's no use in accomplishing so much and then ending up in a hospital or ill or drained and unable to care for your family. That is not worth it. 00:12:58 Melissa: So join the masterclass. It is free. Sign up in the link below. And this is part of what we will do. So this method that I speak of, right? We could call it the 'I.I.I. method,' right? It has worked for me and I have seen it in practice work for moms with very different life experiences. So in this masterclass, I have full confidence that you're gonna be able to take away insights that are going to be actionable and you can tailor for your family, for your business immediately. 00:13:28 Melissa: So here we go. What is it you're going to learn with a little bit more specificity? So you are going to go through an exercise that other business leaders go through. I'm going to help you reimagine your company vision so that you're energized when you read the mission, think of the mission. And let me tell you right now, it is not the mission that you might have on your company website, nor is it a manifesto of any kind. It is a personal mission. I did the exercise myself. I was crying after I wrote my version of the same method, the same exact framework and exercise you will do live in the masterclass. 00:14:07 Melissa: Here's the second thing. During the masterclass, you're also gonna learn how to be focused on the right relationships to build. You only have 30 days, right? Let's imagine you want to really sprint and you wanna end up at the end of the year with more revenue. This is what you need to be maniacally focused on. Who do you need on your side to help you, to give you access, to really amplify your message? That's what we're going to talk about. How to find that focus. 00:14:40 Melissa: So this way, again, you're getting to your goal or exceeding them without draining your mom energy. This is really big. Third idea, again, Impostor Syndrome. That is something that is so difficult to erase and that is a use of energy. So why not work with our natural ways of being and how we feel? Why not use as an example, if you're an introvert, why not use that to your benefit? 00:15:07 Melissa: There are ways, happy to answer them in the live Q&A during the masterclass. So this idea, Impostor Syndrome, that's the third concept that we're gonna go through during the masterclass. So I'm gonna make it super easy for you. I wanna be sure that I am present and available for you on two days. So you're gonna have some options. Go to melissallarena.com/masterclass. You're going to see some options for every single one for us to participate, be together in a virtual room, live, okay? 00:15:42 Melissa: So I will be live. I will be running this master class on September 23rd, two time slots and also September 24th, two time slots. Please go to melissallarena.com/masterclass. 00:15:56 Melissa: And here's what is also important. When you sign up, I'm gonna give you a gift. We're gonna talk about gift giving. It's going to be holiday season right now in September. So sign up melissallarena.com/masterclass You're going to get a downloadable workbook. This workbook is going to help you instantly. If you actually open it up and do the same exercise that I referenced early that made me cry and gave me energy to keep going. 00:16:17 Melissa: You're gonna be able to do it immediately once you sign up because you're gonna get the workbook. So you're gonna get the workbook, whether you could attend live or not. You're gonna get it immediately when you sign up and you can get started in that exercise. I made it very self-explanatory. However, however, there are so many other steps to my process. There are so many other things that we're going to talk about during the live masterclass, and there is no, no swap for attending a master class live because you get to ask your questions. 00:17:00 Melissa: Okay, here's something else. I want to make this so no-brainer for you. Not only, immediately when you sign up do you get this workbook where you'll be able to do your own exercise on your company vision, which is one of the core things that can energize you to get you going and keep you going. But then on top of that, as a bonus for showing up live and you're welcome to invite a friend, a mom founder as well, so they can participate too. But for being there live, you are also going to get a 30-day profitable networking action plan and tracker. And we're going to be able, or you will be able, to connect your vision to daily tangible actions, which is so amazing, because sometimes we get really lost in the weeds if we're just doing, doing, doing, doing, doing, doing, doing, but we don't have a reminder of why every single day. 00:18:00 Melissa: And in this 30-day planner that you get for showing up live to the master class on the date that you sign up for, you are going to be able to have a very easy, easy, easy visual so that you can track exactly what you're doing and how you can continue to improve over the course of 30 days as you build those profitable...relationships. It is sensational. I cannot wait to get it in your hands and you just have to show up live to the masterclass in order to get it. 00:18:30 Melissa: On top of that, I told you it's like holiday season for moms in September, right? On top of that, for showing up live to this masterclass, you will also be put in a drawing to be a guest on this very podcast. This is huge because here's what happens if you are on the same platform as someone who is famous for example as many people who have been on this podcast are for example Zibby Owens, you have Gary Vaynerchuk, James Altucher, Suzy Batiz, Beth Comstock, if you're on the same platform as these individuals imagine what that's gonna do for you. It's almost kind of like osmosis in the sense that people are going to presume that you're more credible than maybe you, yourself had originally thought you were. People are going to assume your prices must be higher then, you know, someone who is not associated in any way with one of these famous individuals. 00:19:31 Melissa: So please, please do your very best. I know you're a mom. I know you're busy. I know things change last minute. Speaking of every single mom who's listening to this, and I know this myself as a mom with three children, this is a really huge opportunity. This is a once in a lifetime. You do not wanna miss out on this master class. It is on September 23rd. You will see other dates there in the actual URL, melissallarena.com/masterclass And the focus is about, you know, having you get to the end of the year, feeling like you put it all on the table and you got it done and you did not have to drag yourself to the finish line. It's all about getting to the finish line and being able to like grab your award or your medal with energy and enthusiasm and being able to have fun and enjoy it and be in bliss with your family. 00:20:24 Melissa: I think that is what for me is a new definition of success. It's not just, you know, a goal quote unquote, like, okay, you know, like get this many, you know, this much in revenue or this many downloads. It's not that, it's not juicy enough. It doesn't have the pull that I need as a mom who's busy and has a lot of things going on. And I'm sure it's the same for you. And that's why I want you to attend this masterclass. So before we end, I wanna just read again the name of the masterclass. I actually put out a vote to mom founders. And this was the title that you guys came up with because this is what is going to help you get to the end of this year's finish line. 00:21:04 Melissa: The masterclass again is called How to Craft a Focus Year-End Networking Strategy to Build Profitable Relationships in 30 Days without Draining Your Mom Energy. Go to the link,melissallarena.com/masterclass Sign up immediately, invite a friend, it is free. It will be live and there are perks for attending live. You, yourself might be next on this podcast. 00:21:31 Melissa: You're gonna be entered into a drawing for attending live. You're gonna get the 30 day planner and tracker for attending live. You're also gonna get to ask me anything related to profitable networking or being a present mom, anything that's on your mind. That's gonna be the key to your success so that the end of the year, you feel sensational because you deserve it. You work freaking hard and I want you to get the results and I want you to feel like you've got everything back and more in terms of all the effort you're putting out for everyone else. It's your turn. 00:22:03 Melissa: Alrighty, so I even wrote this down because I was like, you know what, I cannot forget to say this. So if you enjoyed today's episode, they drop every single Tuesday. If you're watching this on YouTube, be sure to hit that bell to subscribe so that you have instant access to these conversations from mom founders who need to use their imagination to get to where they're going. Also, if you're listening to this on audio, let's make it official. Let's just change our relationship status from listening to like officially following. So click follow if you're on iTunes or Spotify, please go ahead and do that wonderful deed. 00:22:47 Melissa: And here's the thing, thank you. Okay, from the bottom of my heart, from the essence of who I am, I wanna thank you for listening. I wanna thank you for being here. I wanna thank you for opening up your business. You're doing a service to the world. And I know it's gonna be a better place because of it. 00:23:05 Melissa: And I also wanna say thank you because the listeners, you guys, you guys are giving me the energy and enthusiasm I need to like put my makeup on for YouTube to have the guts to invite these podcast guests on this podcast for anyone on audio, and just, you know, to get to another place in my mind to change my gear to on and fully out there. And it takes a lot and you're giving me a lot. So I appreciate you and I wanna see you. I wanna meet every single one of you and invite your friends. Again, attending live has its perks. Go to melissallarena.com/masterclass Thank you and until next Tuesday.
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247: Entreprenista Co-Founder Stephanie Cartin: Communities for Business Growth This Fall! (Hot Off the Press News! Join Melissa on Sept 23rd for a FREE LIVE Masterclass: Master Networking for Business Growth without Burnout!)
Do you ever find yourself spinning a million plates while trying to rock both motherhood and business? 🎡 You're not alone, mama! This week, I'm diving into a super insightful chat with Stephanie Cartin, co-founder of Socialfly and Entreprenista. We're talking all about the magic mix of motherhood and entrepreneurship. Stephanie's got some killer tips on how to stay laser-focused, juggle all the pieces (without turning into confetti), and still have time to chase your little ones around the house. Plus, she's sharing how her daughter, Molly, sparks her creativity in ways that only a mom could understand. If you've ever felt like you're doing all the things and need a little extra oomph to keep going, this episode is for you! In this episode, you will hear: Prioritizing tasks that align with business goals to avoid distractions and stay focused. How maintaining focus on core business activities is essential for growth and success. Community and networking's role in business success, especially for women entrepreneurs. Asking for support and leveraging community resources to grow your business. Strategies for creating a productive work environment at home. Finding the right mentor who aligns with your goals and trusting your instincts This episode is brought to you by my Free LIVE Masterclass on 9/23, 9/24 for business owners who are moms. The title is: Master Your Year-End Networking: Build Profitable Relationships For Business Growth in 30 Days Without Burnout A LIVE one-hour masterclass for visionary mom business owners: Close the year strong with the proven "Imagination to Impact to Income Method™" to manage time, energy, and stay focused through gatekeeper-free networking. 👉The key to rapid business growth spurts for mom business founders is a clear focus on building business networking relationships that pack a punch, allowing you to achieve maximum results in your limited time. Join me to craft your own focused year-end networking strategy that you'll actually execute. We'll unleash creative thinking for both your strategic approach and ways to keep your energy high, not drained! A message from our sponsor…. Drowning in unfinished projects and distractions? Let's simplify your focus and show you a better way to achieve your business goals! But first, let's talk about computer tabs. How many do you have open? I have 20—some for my three sons and a ChatGPT tab I keep open. Then there are the open loops and micro-decisions popping up as a mom and business owner. Some projects are 10% done, others 90%. It's easy to lose sight of the bigger picture, especially since the moment of bravery when you first started your business might feel distant. That's why it's crucial to focus on one profitable networking goal based on your mom season. If you want a Big Mac-sized impact quickly, this is the best value meal for moms. I'm hosting a LIVE 60-minute masterclass: Master Your Year-End Networking Strategy to Build Profitable Relationships in 30 Days Without Burnout. Sign-up today: https://www.melissallarena.com/masterclass/ I'm dedicating my energy and resources to this masterclass in my mom-to-tweens life. This strategy works every time and is central to my Imagination to Impact to Income Method™. By focusing on one networking goal, you cut the fat from your daily activities and clear your mental cache. This helps you be fully present for both your kids and your business. Want to know where to focus on building profitable relationships during your mom season? I'll show you how to identify the most critical relationships for a 30-day sprint and achieve your year-end goals. Learn how my method differs from old-fashioned networking and hear the tangible results my clients have achieved. In this masterclass, I'll guide you through: · Reimagining your company vision to reignite your passion, helping you surpass your 2024 goals and savor the holidays with the energy you deserve. · Discovering a clear focus for relationship-building in your business, so you can channel your energy into strategies with lasting impact, beyond fleeting social media posts. · Proactively addressing impostor syndrome, empowering you to overcome self-doubt and conserve your energy for what truly matters. Click here to grab your spot. Let's get you focused, Melissa P.S. Show up LIVE to my free class and you will get a BONUS 30-Day Profitable Networking Action Plan and Tracker that connects your vision to daily actions! It's a smart, actionable, and mom-friendly planner to map out your 30-day networking activities to keep you focused on the right things. It also sees to it that you replenish your energy to prevent burnout. EXTRA bonus for showing up LIVE is that you will be entered into a drawing to be a podcast guest on the Mom Founder Imagination Hub. About Stephanie Cartin Stephanie Cartin is a serial entrepreneur, investor, podcast host, community builder, and a champion for women founders. She created The Entreprenista League, a community for women founders, to provide resources and support necessary at all business stages. She's also the Co-founder of Socialfly, one of the first social media marketing agencies, as well as Entreprenista Media and Pearl Influential Capital which was recently acquired by Cherub. Stephanie has shared her journey managing her health challenges with Multiple Sclerosis, Infertility, and a complicated pregnancy and is an advocate for women going through similar challenges. Her story and businesses have been featured on the Today Show, Bloomberg and Forbes. Consider Stephanie your biggest business cheerleader. Quotes, that can change your perspective: "Entrepreneurs still really came to be because so many women started reaching out to us with needing help, you know, growing their business and wanting to hear how we were able to grow Socialfly." - Stephanie Cartin "If you don't ask, you don't get." - Stephanie Cartin "When you try to do every single thing at once, doesn't always work out." - Stephanie Cartin "You need your tribe. You need that community in business to really be able to move forward." - Stephanie Cartin "And things that don't align with those specific goals are probably the things not to focus on until you get your business into a place that can actually run and make money. So for us, it was very important that we focused on revenue generating activities that were going to be able to drive actual business results." - Stephanie Cartin SHARE this episode with the mompreneurs in your life who are juggling motherhood and business and discover how to focus your energy, build profitable relationships, and find support within a thriving community! Supporting Resources: Website: https://entreprenista.com Instagram: @stephjillcartin @entreprenistas Twitter: @stephjillcartin @2entreprenistas Facebook: Facebook.com/entreprenistas Subscribe and Review Have you subscribed to my podcast for new moms who are entrepreneurs, founders, and creators? I'd love for you to subscribe if you haven't yet. I'd love it even more if you could drop a review or 5-star rating over on Apple Podcasts. Simply select "Ratings and Reviews" and "Write a Review" then a quick line with your favorite part of the episode. It only takes a second and it helps spread the word about the podcast for writer moms. TRANSCRIPT 00:00:00 Stephanie: Entreprenista really came to be because so many women started reaching out to us with needing help, you know, growing their business and wanting to hear how we were able to grow Socialfly. And we realized it just became impossible to go out to coffee all day with everyone and run a business. So we started thinking, you know, how can we help as many women founders as possible, but actually do it at scale? 00:00:22 Melissa: Welcome to the Mom Founder Imagination Hub, your weekly podcast to inspire you to dream bigger. Plan out how you're going to get to that next level in business. Find the energy to keep going and make sure your creative juices are flowing so that this way you get what you really want rather than having to settle. Get ready to discover how Mom Founders have reimagined entrepreneurship and motherhood. Ever wonder how they do it? Tune in to find out. And stretch yourself by also learning from diverse entrepreneurs who might not be moms but who have lessons you can tailor about how you can disrupt industries and step way outside of your comfort zone. I believe every mom's superpower is her imagination. In this podcast, I'm going to give you the mindset, methods, and tools to unleash yours. Sounds good? Then keep listening. 00:01:15 Melissa: How do you know what to focus on? How do you know that what you're doing are the right things in terms of revenue generating activities for your business? So in today's conversation with Stephanie Cartin of the Entreprenista League, I wanted to share with you some of the insights that Stephanie has garnered over the last 13 years or so, just the same amount of time I've been in business as far as really understanding what to focus on, when to focus on it, and how to even come up with your own focus plan. And I think this is so, so important, especially if you're a mom in business and you have several things that you have to focus on because you're a mom and you care so much about your kids and you care so much about your business. So enjoy the conversation and definitely let me know what you think and let me know what you think about Stephanie's focus plan very specifically once she became a mom. 00:02:11 Melissa: I also wanted to just share this. So this episode is brought to you by a master class that I am doing on September 23rd. You can absolutely sign up. The link is in the show notes. The link is in the description. Go to melissallarena.com/masterclass. During that class, what we're gonna go through are three things. Your company vision. What if it could energize you so that this way you could effectively achieve your year-end goals. The second point is going to be focus which is the topic that we talked about today with Stephanie and the third idea is imposter syndrome. Oftentimes when we become moms we might feel a little bit extra insecure, unsure of ourselves and it's something that I don't want to stop you as you pursue your business growth goals. 00:02:59 Melissa: And here's the big picker what we're going to be contextualizing the conversation around is building profitable relationships. So building relationships with people who can help you go further, faster, and with fewer mistakes. So go ahead to https://www.melissallarena.com/masterclass. I am excited to bring this conversation over to you. Just to make sure you have the official name, it's how to craft a focused year end networking strategy to build profitable relationships in 30 days. And here is the kicker, without draining your mom energy. And that is the biggest reason to attend because we can drag ourselves to the end of anywhere. 00:03:45 Melissa: But what if you could feel energized, you could feel on purpose, intentional, and like you are streamlined towards your efforts of business success? That is what we're going to talk about during this free masterclass. Just go to the link, sign up. The moment you sign up, you're going to get something because the gifts will keep on giving at this point. You're going to get a workbook that you can use during the live session. The live session, there will be benefits for attending live. The first benefit is that you're also going to get a 30 day action plan and tracker that is built with your energy in mind so that what we discussed live during the masterclass, you can implement and activate in 30 days and you can begin to build profitable relationships immediately. Here's the thing, sometimes we attend these masterclasses and we're like, okay, so how am I going to implement this? 00:04:43 Melissa: Well, if you attend live this masterclass on September 23rd, the link will be below https://www.melissallarena.com/masterclass Attending live, you will get the fundamentals, you will get the foundation of how to build profitable relationships in a way that is energizing so that you can achieve your year-end goals. And then for showing up live, you're going to get an actual planner. And this planner is going to be with you, a mom in mind. And it's going to help you build out the profitable relationships you need to grow your business this year so that this way you have achieved your goal. 00:05:16 Melissa: I am so excited. On top of that for showing live, here's what I want to do just for attendees. I will enter you into a drawing. And in this drawing, I will pick one winner and that winner will be featured on this very podcast, the Mom Founder Imagination Hub. Imagine that being featured alongside someone like today's guest, Stephanie, someone like Liz Tennedy of Motherly, someone like Zibi Owens of the Zibi Media. I mean, it is sensational the amount of visibility that you can have for attending live and winning that drawing. So one, podcast guest spot, two, someone that attends live on September 23rd. You will also notice I am also doing it on September 24th. 00:06:06 Melissa: So you get to pick the dropdown on the website and select the best time for you and you will want to show up live. So showing up live brings its benefits. Number one, the 30-day planner, so that you can really, down to the tactic and daily amount of effort, figure out what needs to happen to build profitable relationships, and also do it in a way that is not draining to prevent burnout. And again, for attending live, this masterclass on September 23rd, you will also be entered into a drawing to be a podcast guest. 00:06:37 Melissa: So the name of the masterclass, just so that you have it, how to craft a focused year-end networking strategy to build profitable relationships in 30 days without draining your mom energy. We need energy, we need enthusiasm in order to accomplish what we want. That is what makes it worthwhile. That is why when our kids see us, we want them to see us high on life and excited about what we are pursuing because that is a model to them. They, we will want to see them high on life and excited about what they are pursuing. So join me on September 23rd. 00:07:11 Melissa: You pick the time and go ahead and get ready to understand everything it takes in order to build profitable relationships in 30 days without draining your mom energy during this free live master class. I am so excited about it. I wanna tell everyone and scream it from the mountain tops, which is why I wanted to share that with you before we get into the conversation with Stephanie. 00:07:37 Melissa: Again, all of this is in the show notes. Just go to the link, https://www.melissallarena.com/masterclass above and beyond that. The conversation with Stephanie is really exciting if you have a business right now and you feel unsupported. So I really encourage you to take Stephanie's guidance and wisdom to heart and apply it in your mom in business life. Enjoy the conversation, all of her bio, her official bio will be in the show notes. Check it out again. 00:08:05 Melissa: She is the co-founder of several organizations, Socialfly, she's also the co-founder of the Entreprenista League. And I want to leave you right there with Stephanie. Enjoy the conversation. 00:08:20 Melissa: Stephanie Cartin, I am so excited to have you on the podcast. How are you doing? How's Florida feeling? Tell me everything. 00:08:29 Stephanie: Oh my goodness, well, I love living in Florida. There is palm trees, sunshine, no state income tax. What else can you ask for? 00:08:37 Melissa: Yeah, I think, you know, the ocean, right? So I'm in Texas and I think we have palm trees, no income tax and sunshine, but we don't have an ocean. 00:08:47 Stephanie: Yes. 00:08:48 Melissa: I'm an ocean baby. Oh my goodness. 00:08:50 Stephanie: Well, come on, move on down. I'm an unofficial state recruiter for Florida, I feel like. 00:08:57 Melissa: I love it, I love it. Yeah, easy to recruit, let me tell you that. But Stephanie, I'm so excited to have you here because I feel like the last time that I bumped into you was Podcast Movement or PodFest. 00:09:09 Stephanie: PodFest in Orlando, yeah. 00:09:11 Melissa: In Orlando and you were up on a stage on a panel sharing your wisdom around, you know, growing a business. And you know, I think you also got a chance to share a bit about being a mom and Molly and all that. But in this conversation, we're going to get so mom, it's gonna be unbelievably mommy. But also mommy and money, right? So there's two sides of that. So here's where I want to kind of gauge your perspective though. How have you changed as a business leader now that you are a mom? Because that can be very personal. 00:09:49 Stephanie: Yes, well, I would say I'm just even more efficient and cognizant with how I spend my time because every single second counts. And for me, the way I'm able to, you know, optimize and execute everything that I'm able to do is by really relying on that Google calendar that I have. So I calendar every single thing that I have to do, whether it's a meeting, a podcast recording, driving my daughter or picking her up from school or camp or activities, every single thing has to go on the calendar and that's how I'm able to optimize and stay organized and get everything done. 00:10:29 Melissa: Yeah, yeah, I get it, I get it. And so I'm so curious. So, okay, so here you have you know, multiple businesses, right? You're like a serial entrepreneur, angel investor. I believe you've also been, or experienced an acquisition as well. So many roles, so many hats. I'm wondering which, like how do you, not just make it work as a mom and a business owner, but do you just make sense of all these pieces? Because there's so many pieces. And what I have found is once you move forward in any direction, then more pieces come up and they're like, oh, another this. So how do you… how do you in your mind, like, not, I don't know, blow up like confetti or something? 00:11:16 Stephanie: Some days I feel like that. Absolutely. So really it's not doing every single thing at once. So I'll share a little backstory of how Courtney and I actually started our first business and how we went on to start other businesses. So we started Socialfly, which is a full service social media marketing and influencer agency initially back in 2011 on the side of our full-time jobs. So we were both working in the corporate world in New York City. We partnered together and started taking clients on the side, really working nights and weekends for about 10 months before we said to each other, all right, this is gonna be an actual business, we have to go all in and do it, or we just can't keep doing this. It just became too much to be working full time and trying to start this business. 00:11:59 Stephanie: You know, we had no time. We weren't parents at the time. I mean, I wasn't a parent at the time, but we just had no time to like eat or breathe because we were trying to do two things full time. So we decided to take that leap. It was May 4th, 2012 and we quit our corporate jobs and never looked back and were able to actually focus on building and growing Socialfly. And I share that word focus because it's something that has been really challenging for us over the years, but also very important because I know a lot of entrepreneurs can relate to this. 00:12:36 Stephanie: It's like when you have entrepreneurship like in your DNA, you're always thinking of new ideas, how to make things better, how to build things. So like if you're focusing on building something and you have this other idea, it's like, oh, I wanna try that, I wanna start that. But when you get distracted from the core thing that you're initially building, it can become a distraction. So trying to figure out when does it make sense to like go after this next thing and when does it make sense to stay focused? So this is something that I battled this, I battled this a bit more than Courtney because I was like always like, thinking of these things that I wanted to start. And I'd be like, Courtney, let's do this. She's like, Stephanie, stay focused. So also great to have a business partner. 00:13:17 Stephanie: I'll go back, we start growing and scaling Socialfly. And, you know, Entreprenista still really came to be because so many women started reaching out to us with needing help, you know, growing their business and wanting to hear how we were able to grow Socialfly. And we realized it just became impossible to go out to coffee all day with everyone and run a business. So we started thinking, you know, how can we help as many women founders as possible, but actually do it at scale? So that was our initial idea to start our podcast, Entreprenista, to share all of these incredible stories of women like yourself that are building businesses and have so much insight and advice to share. 00:13:55 Stephanie: So, Entreprenista started as our podcast, really on the side of running our agency business. And from there, it wasn't until 2020 when everything happened with the pandemic. And so many of our listeners and followers were reaching out to us needing more help and feedback and advice and support because of the pandemic that we realized at that time, we really needed to build Entreprenista into what we've now done over the past four years, which was built into our media company and a membership community for women founders and leaders. 00:14:24 Stephanie: But, Courtney and I were years in business at that point where we had already built out our management team at Socialfly. We had the support, we had the resources. So I was essentially able to step away from running the day-to-day operations of Socialfly with Courtney. She was able to continue running that business and I was able to then focus on Entreprenista. 00:14:44 Stephanie: So with all of the other ventures and businesses and projects that we've started, we've always tried to do things at a time when it just made sense based on where the core business was at that time and based on specific priorities. But when you try to do every single thing at once, doesn't always work out. 00:15:05 Melissa: Oh yeah, I think I've been there a thousand times actually. This is so interesting. So the word 'focus', the word 'distraction', I almost feel like those two things are like kryptonite for a mom with a business. And also the word 'core'. Because here is the reality at least from me, and probably you might think this way too. It's kind of like, "What's my core?" Like for real, for real. And for me, core is being a mom to my three little boys. And I choose to really be super present when I'm with them. But at the same time, there's a lot of lack of focus, a lot of distraction, when it comes to working on my business, if I'm with my kids. I'm just wondering, have you had to reimagine that word 'focus' for yourself now that you're a mom with a business? 00:15:57 Stephanie: Absolutely. And being able to prioritize the times that I'm focused and present and there with Molly and then the times that I'm focused and present on my work. Everything I feel was very blurred during the pandemic, of course, because at that time, my daughter was nine months old at the time when the pandemic first started. And now I had been going into my office for a few months in New York City at that time. As I mentioned, I'm down in Florida now, so things look a lot different. 00:16:26 Stephanie: But I was going into my office and my husband was staying home with my daughter at the time. So I was able to go in and focus on work during the day and then come home and be present with Molly. But then when the pandemic happened, now here I am working from home at the time in New York City in a small apartment with a little baby. And it's like, it's very hard to figure out how do I focus on my work where there's this little baby that's right here that needs me too even though my husband was staying home with her. It was very hard. It was very challenging and really just trying to figure out how do I make a plan and figure out how to make this work and somehow I did. 00:17:04 Melissa: Yeah. And I'm so curious just because I feel like I'm cheating off a test but what did your plan look like? How did you start thinking about that? Because I think listeners would love a perspective of how to get started in their focus attack plan. 00:17:19 Stephanie: Yeah, so I'm going to fast forward a bit. We left New York City. We ended up actually going down to Tennessee to stay with family for a bit before we moved down to Florida. And once we were down here in Florida, we were living in a house. So I had space here. So I was able to actually have a room for an office and have separate space from Molly. So during the day, I was actually able to come into a physical office. And even though I was working from home, be focused working in my office, the door was closed and my husband would be there with Molly during the day. And I would have, especially when she was younger, and I nursed for many, many years, so I would take times to go out and nurse her or Greg would bring her into my office. But that's what really worked for me. It was being able to have that separate space in our house that made it a lot easier. 00:18:10 Melissa: Yeah, I think that's something that, it just depends, right? If you're in an urban environment, maybe you don't have that available. But if you're in like a little bit more of a space situation, then it's possible. So okay, you had a plan. And I think that is something that a lot of moms, it's almost like we're flying by the seat of our pants as moms and in business, right? And so I'm just kind of wondering like for you, as far as building out your practice, focusing on the right things at the right time, how do you even decide what to focus on? What comes first and what comes never or what comes next? 00:18:44 Stephanie: Well, in business, when you're running a business, your goal is to build a profitable, scalable business. So being able to focus on the things that you need to do in business to achieve that is absolute priority. And things that don't align with those specific goals are probably the things not to focus on until you get your business into a place that can actually run and make money. So for us, it was very important that we focused on revenue generating activities that were going to be able to drive actual business results. And then, a lot of the other things that we wanted to do that were nice to have that weren't going to essentially move the needle to build the business, we couldn't focus or prioritize those things. 00:19:30 Stephanie: So again, you really have to be sure that when you're building a business, you are making a plan, have a business plan, have a strategic plan and focus and execute that plan and make sure that you surround yourself with a community and people around you who are gonna help you, who can advise you, who can lift you up, who can provide you with guidance, which is one of the reasons why we created our Entreprenista League community to make it a lot easier, to make it more accessible, and for people to have the support they need when growing and scaling a business. 00:20:00 Stephanie: Courtney and I, as we were growing our first business, Socialfly, we joined groups, networking groups, organizations, leadership groups, groups where we had coaches. We were always seeking out people who could help us and could teach us and who could help us move our business forward and where we could learn as much as possible. So when we set out to create the Entreprenista League, in the middle of the pandemic, we knew we had to bring together everything we wish we had when we were first starting out under one roof, because so many times I even see now founders reaching out, they're just like, who are not yet part of our community trying to figure everything out. "How do I do this?" "How do I find this person?" 00:20:37 Stephanie: And it's like, you got to get in a group. You got to get in a community to support you because it's hard to do everything by yourself. But when you have people around you to support you, just like in motherhood, right? You need your tribe. You need that community in business to really be able to move forward. 00:20:53 Melissa: Yeah, and you know what I've noticed is I've been part of different groups myself is that there is that support, but maybe we don't ask for the support or we don't ask for what we really, really need. We don't look for it. We don't actually make it happen within those communities. And so I'm just wondering, what have you noticed in terms of the people that have been able to create their own opportunities within Entreprenista or people that maybe haven't as much like any tips there? 00:21:20 Stephanie: Yeah, if you don't ask, you don't get. And you should be asking for absolutely everything. The power of growing your business is asking questions, building relationships, connecting with the right people, learn from people who are a little bit ahead of you, who can teach you the things you might not have even thought about. Like they might, they do know things that you don't even know what questions to ask because you're not there yet. Ask them what questions do you wish you asked when you were at my stage in business that I might not even know to ask at? That's the power of a community, right? You have that access. 00:21:59 Stephanie: And again, if you don't ask those questions or you don't ask what you should be asking, you're not gonna find out the answers. And I can tell you, like in our Entreprenista League community, everyone is there to help support each other, to give feedback, to build relationships. It truly is this community where there is only collaboration over competition. No one is trying to take business from each other. Everyone's like, how can we help support each other? And how can we help make the best connections to really support everyone? Because that's what it's all about. 00:22:30 Melissa: Yeah, I would agree. And I think, to kind of go back to the whole focus thing versus distraction and being a mom with a business. Here's something that is a real struggle that I have found because I tend to ask a lot, a lot, a lot, a lot. So sometimes different people give you different answers and they take you off focus or they might send you down a distraction path. Any sort of wisdom around how to discern what information or who to listen to when you're on your path. 00:23:03 Stephanie: You know, you wanna be sure you're listening to people who do have the expertise, who have either done what you're trying to do, or they... You can definitely validate that they have the expertise to be giving you that guidance. Ultimately, you need to trust your gut. You know, if someone gives you advice and you're like, that just does not feel right. That does not sit right with me. That goes against everything I would typically do. Don't do it. 00:23:31 Stephanie: Listen to that voice inside you, to that feeling inside of you. That's something I've always done. Like I've always really tried to sit with things. If something doesn't feel right, or if someone doesn't feel right to build a relationship with and something feels off, there's a reason we all, especially as moms, have this extra sense and just know things, listen to that voice, go with that feeling. 00:23:58 Melissa: Yeah, that's totally true. And it's something that translates, whether it's in your mom life or it's in business life because it's kind of almost how we could perceive our kids' friends. Like, "Oh is that the right influence?" "Isn't that the right influence?" We kind of have a sense. So along the same lines because you have such experiences with the co-founder, right? Using the same level of discernment and 'spidey sense', how can one who wants to build her business alongside someone else find the right co-founder, a co-founder in terms of you work well, you trust each other, complimentary skills, et cetera. 00:24:27 Stephanie: Yeah, so having complimentary skill sets is definitely something that has been very powerful for myself and Courtney. We really do have completely opposite skill sets, but what we have is value alignment and vision alignment and complete trust in each other. So those are the three things you want to be sure that you have, your values are aligned, and you really are aligned on your mission and where you wanna build and grow the business and that you absolutely trust each other. 00:25:07 Stephanie: I know that no matter what, Courtney and I would never do anything to hurt the business, hurt each other. We are so committed. And look, we've been in a business relationship. It's like a marriage, right? For... Since 2011, essentially. It's been many, many years. And any relationship is going to grow and evolve over time. We essentially grew up together in business. Our lives have evolved and changed so much over the years. We've both been through so much professionally and personally together. But we have that trust in each other. And we have this vision of what we want to do and what we want to build. And we know we're always gonna be there for each other. 00:25:51 Stephanie: So if you're thinking about going into business with a partner, you have to have these conversations when you're just getting started. And I remember in one of the coaching groups that we were in, we talked about having these fierce conversations and these uncomfortable conversations. If you're afraid to have those conversations in the beginning, you're definitely gonna be afraid to have them when something actually happens and you really need to be able to talk to each other and feel comfortable. 00:26:19 Stephanie: So have those uncomfortable conversations upfront. Talk about if certain things happen in the business, if certain things happen in your lives and things change, like "What are you gonna do?" And something that we always recommend that you should have with a business partner is you need an operating agreement. And we recommend, of course, you speak with a business attorney about having an operating agreement when you get set up. And it can be uncomfortable to have those conversations about the what ifs. 00:26:48 Stephanie: Look, I was, you know, basically could only work part time for six months when I was on bed rest during my pregnancy. And there was so much that was riding on Courtney. And we had to have a lot of these really hard conversations to figure things out. So you need to be able to have trust and open communication with your business partner and please have these conversations upfront before you go into business. 00:27:11 Melissa: Yeah, absolutely. I mean, the same can be said just as you mentioned, you know, like a…relationship, a romantic relationship, right? If you're not going to be able to have those conversations up front, it's like, hello, please have them before you sign any contracts. So Stephanie, this has been amazing. I think anyone that's listening can have, you know, some clarity around what they might want to do this very week in terms of their business building efforts. But let me ask you this from your perspective as a mom, because a lot of what I do is help people really get their creative juices going. And I believe that as parents, especially if we have little ones, like we can learn from our little ones because their imaginations are like fully turned on. So here's my question to you. How has your daughter inspired you in terms of getting your creative juices going? 00:28:01 Stephanie: Oh my goodness. My little one, Molly, inspires me every single day. And there is nothing more magical than watching these little kids and their imagination and the things that they think of. We have started doing a lot of different classes. I say we, I take her and get to watch her and it gets my imagination going just watching her. But actually yesterday it was wonderful because we started, she started piano lessons. I say we, because I'm literally sitting there with her, but she started piano lessons and really just seeing her learn and grow and just watching her experience life now, like through the eyes of this like innocent, magical little human, there's just nothing better. So I absolutely feel so lucky to be her mom and she was our little miracle baby and there's nothing better. 00:28:55 Melissa: Thank you for that. I think you know, a lot of us, you know, especially we are navigating just motherhood and entrepreneurship, we kind of feel like, wow, if I only had more time, if I only had more resources, support, et cetera, but at the same time, it's like, we actually have some really dope competitive advantages. Like we have little people around us that we could hug if we feel stressed or like we could feel inspired by if they're doing something pretty cool. And so I wanted to just bring that point to the conversation, cause I think it's important. And I think that we need to really understand that there's so much value that we have right under our noses that we can just unpack and leverage, right? Thank you so much, Stephanie. So in terms of Entrepreneurista and everything else that you've got going on, where can people follow you and continue to learn more about you? 00:29:43 Stephanie: Of course, yeah, feel free to reach out to me. I'm on LinkedIn and Instagram personally at Steph Jill Cartin. And you can follow Entrepreneurista at entrepreneuristas with S at the end on Instagram. And to join the Entrepreneurista League, which is our community of founders where we have lots of mama [unclear] in our community, you can head to entrepreneurista.com/join. 00:30:05 Melissa: Thank you so much, Stephanie. 00:30:07 Melissa: Here are three things that really captivated my attention with regards to my conversation with Stephanie. Point number one, focus. I think the fact that Stephanie had a focus plan is what stood out for me. What is your focus plan? Do you have a plan? Again, you are totally invited to come on September 23rd to my master class and we will work through what you need to have on that plan that is actually going to help you build profitable relationships. 00:30:35 Melissa: The second point is with regards to finding the right mentor. It has to be a gut check. Not everyone is your person. And I think in terms of finding someone who's ahead of you, in terms of, for example, someone that knows a lot about SEO or someone that knows a lot about relationship building, you have to just gauge for yourself. Is this person someone that I can rely on in terms of having information I could use and it's timely, right? So again, follow your gut instinct with regards to the people that you follow and the advice that you actually [inaudible]. 00:31:10 Melissa: Point number three is this notion of feeling supportive. I think it's really important as a mom, we think about our villages for our children and raising our families. However, what about for building our businesses? So at this point, I would definitely want to encourage you to attend the live master class on September 23rd because you're gonna realize that there's so many other mom founders who want the same thing. You want to have the energy to hang out and be really cool with your kids. You wanna have the energy and give the best you can to your business and you don't want there to be a conflict. 00:31:45 Melissa: And so many of us feel the same way. And for that reason alone, attend the Masterclass on September 23rd. The link is in the show notes, melissallarena.com/masterclass. The name of the Masterclass and it's totally free and it will be live, it is how to craft a focused year-end networking strategy to build profitable relationships in 30 days without draining your mom's energy. And that is so important. I don't want to drag you to a finish line. I want you to sprint there and feel excited and enthusiastic. And then I want your kids to see you excited and enthusiastic. And I think that's the point of differentiation, but I don't want to get lost. 00:32:23 Melissa: I want to see you on September 23rd. I want to see you there. And I want to see the whole you. The whole me is going to be there, both mom Melissa me and business leader Melissa me and I think when you realize that there are valuable lessons learned from either role that is when you can actually produce outstanding results and I want us to be part of your success story. So join me during the master class melissallarena.com/masterclass all of this is in the show notes. Thank you so much and until next Tuesday, you are beautiful. You're amazing. You're capable and I love you and thank you so much for listening. This means the world to me. Thank you again.
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246: Overwhelmed Mom Founders: Discover Playful Strategies to Combat September Back-to-School Stress
Feeling overwhelmed by the constant juggle of running a business and raising kids? You're not alone! Today, we're diving into something that every mom entrepreneur can relate to—overwhelm. If you've ever felt like the to-do list just keeps growing, this episode is for you. I'm sharing my personal strategy for nipping that overwhelm in the bud by tapping into something we often overlook—playfulness. We'll take a look at how taking a moment to laugh at a funny video or doing something light-hearted isn't just procrastination—it's a quick and effective reset. These playful breaks can recharge us, making it easier to tackle the day's challenges with a fresh perspective. Plus, I'll explore how we can learn from the natural playfulness of our kids. They're experts at finding joy in the little things, and by embracing their spirit, we can create a happier, less stressful environment for ourselves and our families. Finally, I give a sneak peek into my upcoming masterclass called: How to Craft a Focused Year-End Networking Strategy to Build Profitable Relationships in 30 Days Without Draining Your Mom Energy designed specifically for mom founders. P.S. the name was tweaked to Year-End Networking: Build Profitable Relationships For Business Growth in 30 Days Without Burnout It's all about building profitable relationships and crushing those year-end goals, complete with a 30-day action planner to keep you on track and burnout free! So, if you're ready to bring more joy and creativity into your life and business, this episode is for you! In this episode, you will hear: Acknowledging overwhelm, especially during busy times like the fall season. Utilizing children's natural playfulness to reduce overwhelm and boost happiness. Why cross-pollination (borrowing ideas from unrelated fields) is a game-changer. The benefits of play in business, including reducing anxiety and fostering calmness.. Challenges of maintaining momentum as a mom entrepreneur and overcoming imposter syndrome. If you're feeling overwhelmed and stretched, join in my free LIVE masterclass called: How to Craft a Focused Year-End Networking Strategy to Build Profitable Relationships in 30 Days Without Draining Your Mom Energy. Sign-up HERE: https://www.melissallarena.com/masterclass/ Get ready to learn a proven strategy that can help you regain control and create lasting change! First a confession, I've always dreamed of a photoshoot with my three sons. Picture this: I'm in an ultra-stretchy dress, and each of my boys is tugging at the material in different directions, making me look like a splattered wad of gum on the floor. It's a funny way of highlighting the real struggle of being pulled in so many directions. Your kids need you, your business needs you—especially when you're aiming for growth. It can feel overwhelming, right? So, I asked myself: What's one thing I could do well, on my own schedule, while working from home? For me, it's focusing on building the right profitable relationships using my Imagination to Impact to Income Method™. That's what I'm sharing in my masterclass, How to Craft a Focused Year-End Networking Strategy to Build Profitable Relationships in 30 Days Without Draining Your Mom Energy. Early in my business, I found an energy-efficient path to boost credibility, expand reach, and earn more income. Building profitable relationships proved more reliable than ads. Reimagining my company vision as an energy resource led to my Imagination to Impact to Income Method™. This method starts with our imagination, an untapped energy source for adults. Our kids know it well. I've used it to become a #1 bestseller, secure podcast guests like GaryVee and Suzy Batiz, garner media (WSJ, etc.), and achieve five-figure months. These wins required my energy and being a mom. Join my free masterclass, How to Craft a Focused Year-End Networking Strategy to Build Profitable Relationships in 30 Days Without Draining Your Mom Energy. Get a roadmap to capture busy contacts' attention, navigate impostor syndrome, and unlock energy inspired by your mission and kids! In this masterclass, I'll guide you through: · Reimagining your company vision to reignite your passion, helping you surpass your 2024 goals and savor the holidays with the energy you deserve. · Discovering a clear focus for relationship-building in your business, so you can channel your energy into strategies with lasting impact, beyond fleeting social media posts. · Proactively addressing impostor syndrome, empowering you to overcome self-doubt and conserve your energy for what truly matters. Click here to grab your spot. In future episodes, I'll share how using your imagination for a focused, profitable networking strategy can energize you. Sign up to get an immediate sneak peek into one of my top energy-boosting secrets (the secret to my pep) with a downloadable workbook sent straight to your inbox. Sending you energy, -Melissa P.S. Show up LIVE to my free class and you will get a BONUS 30-Day Profitable Networking Action Plan and Tracker that connects your vision to daily actions! It's a smart, actionable, and mom-friendly planner to map out your 30-day networking activities to keep you focused on the right things. It also sees to it that you replenish your energy to prevent burnout. EXTRA bonus for showing up LIVE is that you will be entered into a drawing to be a podcast guest on the Mom Founder Imagination Hub. Quotes, that can change your perspective: "Our children are imagination experts in residence. Why not learn from these wonderful individuals who are right there on how they are able to visualize completely random things?" "If you are in a moment of a lot of stress and a lot of steps and a lot of moving parts to anything in your life as a mom in business, then it is really important for you to take a step back every once in a while." "Adopting a playful spirit is a tool for you so that you can use it, and you have people around you, i.e., humans that are kids, who are really great at it. So why not leverage their expertise so that you can get farther?" "I encourage you also to just imagine for yourself: what would be possible if you could do anything that you wanted to do without having to struggle with overwhelm?" SHARE this episode and reignite the joy of play and creativity to conquer overwhelm. Let's empower our fellow mom entrepreneurs to embrace play and confidently manage stress. 💪 About Melissa Llarena Melissa is a bestselling author (learn more on www.fertileideas.com), imagination coach behind the Fertile Imagination to Networking Success Group Coaching Program, consultant, speaker, contributor to ForbesWomen articles that have garnered 4 million-plus views, and the podcast host of the Mom Founder Imagination Hub. Featured guests include GaryVee, Beth Comstock, Suzy Batiz, David Meltzer, and hundreds of other unconventional thinkers. Melissa has been featured in the WSJ, Business Insider, Fox Business, CNN Money, The Huffington Post, and other publications. She holds a psychology degree from NYU, an MBA from the Tuck School of Business at Dartmouth, and a Transformational Coaching Academy certificate and is training to become a meditation practitioner. Melissa lives in Austin, Texas, with her husband and three sons (one singleton and a set of identical twins). Supporting Resources: How to Craft a Focused Year-End Networking Strategy to Build Profitable Relationships in 30 Days Without Draining Your Energy: https://www.melissallarena.com/masterclass/ Podcast: Mom Founder Imagination Hub: https://www.melissallarena.com/podcast/ Instagram: https://www.instagram.com/MelissaLlarena/ Or, grab for free your copy of the "From Contact to Connection: The Mompreneur's Go-First Networking & Follow Up Playbook": https://witty-thinker-2643.ck.page/21e52edb87 Subscribe and Review Have you subscribed to my podcast for new moms who are entrepreneurs, founders, and creators? I'd love for you to subscribe if you haven't yet. I'd love it even more if you could drop a review or 5-star rating over on Apple Podcasts. Simply select "Ratings and Reviews" and "Write a Review" then a quick line with your favorite part of the episode. It only takes a second and it helps spread the word about the podcast for writer moms. TRANSCRIPT 00:00:00 Melissa: If you feel overwhelmed, let's say that you are writing your origin story and it is a sensational one, I know, but you feel overwhelmed. What are the words I should say? What can I include and exclude? How does my business differentiate itself? Here's what I suggest you do. Ask your child for help. 00:00:00 Melissa: Welcome to the Mom Founder Imagination Hub, your weekly podcast to inspire you to dream bigger. Plan out how you're going to get to that next level in business, find the energy to keep going and make sure your creative juices are flowing so that this way you get what you really want rather than having to settle. Get ready to discover how mom founders have reimagined entrepreneurship and motherhood. Ever wonder how they do it? 00:00:45 Melissa: Tune in to find out and stretch yourself by also learning from diverse entrepreneurs, who might not be moms, but who have lessons you can tailor about how you can disrupt industries and step way outside of your comfort zone. I believe every mom's superpower is her imagination. In this podcast, I'm gonna give you the mindset, methods, and tools to unleash yours. Sounds good? Then keep listening. 00:01:14 Melissa: This episode is brought to you by my masterclass: How to Craft a Focused Year-End Networking Strategy to Build Profitable Relationships in 30 Days. It's happening on September 23rd and the 24th. You can check out the link and sign up right below, melissallarena.com/masterclass. Here's what I know having been in business for 13 years, momentum. Have you ever noticed that it has the word mom in the beginning of it? Yet it's really hard to get and feel because we've got so much going on as parents. 00:01:48 Melissa: And the reason why I wanted to just share this masterclass with you is because this is an opportunity for you to understand what you as a mom founder can do to revitalize and re-energize yourself so that you could achieve your year-end goals and also how you will want to focus your efforts to get the biggest bang for your buck and how you can navigate something that pops up often, which is imposter syndrome again, so that you are unstoppable. 00:02:21 Melissa: On September 23rd or the 24th, you'll notice there's a couple of options in terms of the live 60 minute masterclass for mom founders. You will have an opportunity to also, with me, alongside walk through this three step process that I've come up with that is part of a unique method called the Imagination to Impact to Income Method. This method has helped me build profitable relationships and has helped me feel energized once I've done so instead of totally and utterly drained. You know what drains me? This is what drains me. Figuring out algorithms for social media, total drains me. 00:03:04 Melissa: In terms of also figuring out, you know, Facebook ads or "meta ads," that drains me. Also traditional networking activities that are sleazy and transactional, another drainer. And I want to take you through my process of building profitable relationships in a way that you leave the experience feeling more energized, you leave the experience feeling more capable and certain that you can actually implement the insights that I'm going to give you on September 23rd in your business and your life and produce massive results through the art of building profitable relationships. 00:03:43 Melissa: So I want to be sure that you sign up for that. It is free. It is an hour. And I want to give you a couple of ideas in terms of why you should. So this master class, what I've decided to do is offer an opportunity for those who attend live very specifically. If you attend the masterclass live, you will have the opportunity to have my 30-day action planner and tracker. And here's the kicker with that planner that you get for attending live. That's all you got to do. Just show up live and you get the planner in your inbox. 00:04:14 Melissa: You will have an opportunity to map out your 30-day activities in terms of building profitable relationships, but also map out how you intend to refill your cup every single one of those days. And I see both things, energy in, energy out, as equally important and seldom do we see it on one page. That's just part of the planner. There's more to it, but I wanted to give you that as a highlight. 00:04:42 Melissa: Also for showing up live on September 23rd for this masterclass, you will have a chance to enter a drawing and become a podcast guest on this very podcast. So I want to be sure that you have everything that you need and to do that, go ahead to melissallarena.com/masterclass and you will have an email from me with your further instructions. I hope you enjoyed this conversation and I am really, really excited and honored to be in your ears or you're looking at me on YouTube, however you are consuming this content. 00:05:14 Melissa: So again, I hope to see you there during the masterclass. You'll notice a couple of dates and you'll have an opportunity to sit there and really have the actionable insights that have helped me build out my practice for 13 years right there available to you within a 16 minute timeframe. How's that? All right, hope to see you there. Thank you again so much. Bye. 00:05:36 Melissa: Let's talk about overwhelm. I wanna share with you how you can reimagine this idea that you can adopt a more playful spirit in your life, whether it's in business, whether it's in networking or as a mom. And that is how you can nip overwhelm in the bud. And this is as we start a new academic year. Alrighty. So welcome to the show. I am Melissa, your host, and I am so excited about this topic. Here's why. 00:06:09 Melissa: When I have really engaged in professional courses out there for creators, founders, entrepreneurs, whether it is learning how to publicly speak or how to market myself, I have found that the missing part, the missing element of a lot of these programs, these business building or leadership skill building programs is this idea that why can't we just be ourselves? Why can't we approach things with a certain degree of levity so that we can actually have some fun as we're building our businesses or we're just exploring and walking around this planet? 00:06:51 Melissa: And on that note, I want this conversation to be fun for you and fun for me in the moment, even though I'm the one right here with my notes. And if you see me on YouTube, maybe they'll come in and out of the frame. But I want you to really like, take off your shoes if you can, grab a cup of tea, and just enjoy this conversation for what it is. And it's this, it is a tool for you to actually get through this year in a way that you are unscathed and that you can really, really not any longer have to be bogged down by that feeling of overwhelm. 00:07:30 Melissa: Because a lot of things are going to continue to pile up as we get into this new year, this new fall season in terms of our business. So on that note, let me just explain a little bit further in terms of, where playing and this playful attitude comes into place in the way that I partner with moms who are founders of businesses. So I have a method called the Imagination to Impact to Income Method. It is through this method, I would say over the last 13 years, that I have been able to figure out how to really, really make a dent in my little corner of the universe. 00:08:13 Melissa: And when I've dreamt of having big name guests on my podcast, I've applied this exact same method. When I wanted to become a bestseller on Amazon, I applied this same method. And those endeavors were very overwhelming at first. Why would they not be? These are really big undertakings, especially if you're a solopreneur and you have a team that is virtual and not an employee. 00:08:45 Melissa: So here's the thing. I would say that this idea of playing is one that is natural to my personality. And I really enjoy, I feel like it could cut the tension in any room when I go and I'm just myself and I share something that's relatable or I talk about my life as a mom, obviously in a respectful fashion, given the topic of our, you know, conversations will be business building, but it just really helps anyone with whom I'm coaching feel like, okay, I could be myself with this person and I want you to feel that way. So here we go. 00:09:23 Melissa: When it comes to using your imagination to be more playful as you approach how you are going to handle, overwhelm this new fall season, I want you to really just hone in on the benefits and see if there's something that you really wish you could start feeling right now, through the art of playing as a business owner, as a mom, even when you're out there networking with different individuals. 00:09:52 Melissa: So the benefits of play, I know that there are so many articles out there in all of the best journals in the world that say that playing is beneficial to our children. It is how they learn, it is natural to them, and it helps them just stay very curious. But I have personally never, and for sure, please send me a DM if you have, I have not seen how playing benefits a mom. 00:10:19 Melissa: And so I'm about to tell you right now what I have realized over the course of the last 13 years, how it's helped me in my business journey, keep overwhelmed, totally like away from me. So here we go. Benefits of Play in Business. And I'm just going to key into one benefit. As someone who has our MBA, you could take me out of B-school and out of a corporate environment, but there will always be a presentation deck inside of me. 00:10:44 Melissa: So I'm reading from some slides and so in terms of a group coaching program that I'm going to offer and I want to just be sure that I grab your attention with this. So I'm going to do my best to make this as entertaining and playful as possible. Here we go. So the Benefits of Play in Business. First one that really, really makes a big difference is that it reduces anxiety and fosters calmness. Have you noticed when you are really just focused, keyed into a moment with your child and you're playing with them. 00:11:16 Melissa: For me, for example, the other day we were listening to the song, The Floor is Lava. And I'm not gonna play it because who knows, you know, if it's protected. But the point of the matter is, for me, I could have been just looking onward and seeing my three boys having fun, jumping on the sofa without shoes, of course, or I could partake in the adventure. And I decided to do that because it was fun and I'm in the middle of a launch right now. And I decided that that moment I needed to stop the overwhelm that I felt, i.e. codeword anxiety that I felt by doing The Floor is Lava. 00:11:54 Melissa: And if you haven't checked out that video, absolutely go ahead and do so. But that is one of the benefits of being playful in terms of business. It's going to help you in terms of this anxiety that we feel this, like I should be further along. I wish it was last week, but this much work had been done. I've got those same sensations and being playful has helped me in terms of that. Here is a benefit of playing as a mom. And this is really interesting. So here's the thing. 00:12:24 Melissa: I believe firmly in my heart down to my pinky toe that our children are imagination experts in residence. Here's why. Because they are literally going to clock in about 10,000 hours by the age of 12 or so in terms of imagining. And why not learn from these wonderful individuals who are right there on how they are able to visualize completely random things, how they are able to, you know. navigate the world and see things that we totally ignore and miss out on, right? And so why not leverage this opportunity of being playful as one where our kids can teach us how to live better lives. 00:13:10 Melissa: And if we do that, you know what it does? Our kids end up feeling confident. So that's the benefit, right? If all of a sudden we're taking a note from our children and they notice that we are doing what they're doing, then all of a sudden they say, holy cow, mommy's doing what I'm doing. I must have something important to offer or show her. I really think this is just the beginning of confidence building and I think it's worthy of an exploration. 00:13:40 Melissa: So here's the third benefit of play. So we went through the benefits of play in business. Trust me, I've done my research. There are bullets upon bullets that I could share, but that's just one as far as anxiety. The second one is in terms of the benefit as a mom, which is you're boosting confidence in your kids because now all of a sudden they are your teachers. And the third benefit of play, and this is where it's unexpected, and I've applied my method to the most, which is in helping mom founders build profitable relationships, so networking intentionally and unlike the sleazy traditional old ways of networking, this is where we go. 00:14:21 Melissa: So playing is going to help you be more adaptable. It's going to help you be more nimble. I once was coaching the CEO or chief growth officer of Citi Bike. And she told me that the number one quality that is necessary when it comes to startups is this ability to be nimble. Why not play more? It is going to help you flex that muscle. So there's so many benefits to adopting a more playful spirit in your life, right? Whether it is in business, it is as a mom, or it is while networking or profitable networking. 00:14:59 Melissa: So how do you do it, right? How do you do it? Let's make this tangible, Melissa. That is what you're here for. And I wanna give you some very practical ideas that you can execute on immediately so that this way you nip overwhelm in the bud. Please don't let this year be the same thing like last year and the one before, where you feel like your calendar is out of your control. I want you to have a tool to nip that feeling of overwhelm and playing is a great tool. It is useful and it works for me and it's worked for my clients. 00:15:31 Melissa: So here are very practical ideas, four ideas for you. Are you ready for them? Alrighty, you don't have to take notes, but I do want you to just consider adopting some of these ideas. One idea so that this way you can nip overwhelm in the bud. Let's say you feel overwhelmed. You have 16,000 emails in your inbox. And I'm just speaking in terms of a friend. That's not me. So let's say you do, right? And you're like, I don't know which one to tackle first. And I feel overwhelmed. I feel anxious. 00:16:04 Melissa: One idea for you might be, take your kids out to that science museum that is not far from your house. What you will notice is that you're going to be on a, artist date. We can reimagine what these events are, what these experiences are. An artist date is something that Julia Cameron, who's quite famous for her books on creativity, mentions is a signed play. And it just exposes you to like pretty aesthetics. It exposes you to new concepts. If it's a science museum, you'll see how gadgets work and you'll be enjoying that time with your child. 00:16:41 Melissa: I'm not saying allout-avoidance of your inbox. I am saying that you can absolutely, rather than being bamboozled by overwhelm in that moment of that inbox read, you can absolutely decide that you're going to opt out of overwhelm and you're going to take your kid to a science museum. And while you're there, this is the point of differentiation, while you're there, that is going to make you a better business leader. 00:17:08 Melissa: Because now you're on an artist date. Now you're getting new ideas. Now you might be able to imagine, you know, how to, I don't know, incorporate your branding colors in the next Instagram post. So a lot happens when you're not thinking about your business. Isn't that funny? You get your best ideas in the shower. I'm not calling that an artist date, but I'm just saying. Okay, so that's one. 00:17:34 Melissa: Second way that you can play and nip overwhelm in the bud, especially as this year unfolds. So in terms of a kid, you have one because you're a mom and I want you to just really think about this idea. So you know how people say, tell me like I'm a fifth grader, tell me like I'm a five year old? Yes, I invite you if you feel overwhelmed. Let's say that you are writing your origin story and it is a sensational one, I know, but you feel overwhelmed. 00:18:08 Melissa: What are the words I should say? What can I include and exclude? How does my business differentiate itself? Here's what I suggest you do. Ask your child for help. That's it, that's a simple, playful answer. Ask your child for help. Why does this work? Because they are that five-year-old for whom you must simply explain your business. So why not try to explain it to, like legitimately a five-year-old and have them help you cut the fat out of all your language, right? 00:18:38 Melissa: I myself am definitely someone who uses big words oftentimes and if someone doesn't understand me, I would like to know upfront. That is why you can absolutely turn to your child if you feel overwhelmed with writing your origin story as an example. They will ground you and they will say, mommy, that sucks. They'll be honest with you. Or they'll say, what does that mean? And then you have to explain it in simple terms, which is perfect for web copy language. 00:19:05 Melissa: Okay, third very, very practical idea in terms of using play in order to cut down on overwhelm as you continue on this year. So in terms of cross pollination, okay, so this is fancy and I'm so gonna nerd out and I really hope that you still love me at the end of this, but here we go. Cross-pollination has to be my world famous, most amazing thing in the universe. 00:19:33 Melissa: So when I was working in Corporate America or in corporations around the world really, what I realized was that a lot of people who work on completely different things do not talk to each other. And I thought to myself, what if they did? What if they actually borrowed ideas from different categories, different countries, different industries? And that was, for me, it's always been a blast. And my goodness, to really nerd out, I even did an independent project on this idea of cross-pollination. But I'll stop with the nerdy, nerdiness right there. 00:20:08 Melissa: So here we go. What is it? How can you use it as a playful way to nip overwhelm in the bud, quite simply? Let's imagine, and you could see this in terms of how you're tracking your Amazon book orders, or you could see this in terms of your search history, but let's imagine that you are really into gardening, and that is where you go to, at Barnes and Noble's. You'll go to the gardening section every single time and take out those books. 00:20:35 Melissa: Here's where cross-pollination comes into play, and this is how to, again, be more playful about the way you approach solving business problems, as an example. Go to a totally different category. Go to a category that has nothing to do with gardening. Let me tell you, this has real business implications and I count this as being very playful. So here we go. For example, one of the best Nike sneaker designers, his name is Jason Mayden. He actually would absolutely take out books in totally different categories than he was accustomed to in order to come up with better Nike shoe designs. 00:21:15 Melissa: And so that is where you get innovation. You're taking from one place and then you're just cross-pollinating, kind of like a bee, and you are coming up with an innovation. Be playful about it. Beth Comstock, she went to Korea, she went to a K-pop concert for ideas on loyalty building efforts for GE. That is cross-pollination. Again, playful. Let's be playful about it and super practical. You don't have to go to South Korea, although you absolutely can. 00:21:45 Melissa: You can go to the library tonight and just get a book from a totally different category. And just think in a different ways, fire off those neurons in different ways. And you're gonna definitely bring a renewed spirit and like some fresh ideas to whatever business challenge or thing is overwhelming you. 00:22:06 Melissa: Fourth and final, here we go, how to bring play into your life. So there's this idea of, growth mindset. And here's the thing, because I feel like, sometimes, and, me too, like I could be a hypocrite when it comes to growth mindset, for sure. For example, let's say there's a new platform. Do I really wanna learn it? No, not at all. I decide to really be like, fixed in my thinking when it comes to learning a new platform, right? I don't wanna get on the computer. I don't wanna know where you put the buttons now. I just don't. 00:22:40 Melissa: But growth mindset is something we can learn from our kids as well, here's why. So they're learning all the time. They have to do things they've never done before because they just came to this planet. So it's so cool when we adopt the same practice of a growth mindset. So how do you do it? Super simply right now to nip overwhelm in the bud. Okay, so let's imagine that right now you are trying to figure out new logistics this fall season, right? All of a sudden, your three kids are in three different schools. I send you my prayers if that's the case. 00:23:14 Melissa: Well, let's imagine, so you're feeling overwhelmed. You're like, you know what? This really bites. So you might want to, in the spirit of a growth mindset, in the spirit of being playful, honestly just start listening to YouTube videos or watching YouTube videos. Again, I'm not saying procrastination. I'm just saying to, kind of, cut at that tension. Start watching those break dancing YouTube videos, right? From the Olympics that just passed. 00:23:40 Melissa: I'm not saying that you're gonna wanna focus on the Australian breakdancer, although you're gonna laugh and laughter is a playful thing, but do something in that moment of stress and anxiety where you don't know how you're gonna get child A, B, and C to their respective spots and then approach your logistics challenge. 00:24:03 Melissa: So these are four ways that you can use different playful methods to nip overwhelm in the bud. And I really encourage you to imagine this for yourself. I know that it's possible because I've done it myself and I have not let go of being productive. It is not so much a source of procrastination because for me, it's something that's just quick. It's like, okay, I'm watching a YouTube video, I'm laughing and now I can get on with this logistical challenge or whatever it might be for you. 00:24:34 Melissa: And for me, it's also where I find the balance, right? So if you are in a moment of a lot of stress and a lot of steps and a lot of moving parts to anything in your life as a mom in business, then it is really important for you to take a step back every once in a while. First, think about why you're doing everything that you're doing. And then second, think about how you can add some levity to that moment so that it doesn't feel so hard. 00:25:02 Melissa: Because here's what I know, as far as entrepreneurship, you've got to enjoy the process. And that sounds so like, I don't know, sterile, but let's add some pizzazz to that. It is just a lot more fun and interesting if you adopt a playful spirit to anything that you do. And again, you know when you can be playful and when it's inappropriate. So you are way smarter and I don't need to go there. 00:25:28 Melissa: But I just wanted to share this idea that adopting a playful spirit is a tool for you so that you can use it. And you have people around you, i.e., humans that are kids, who are really great at it. So why not leverage their expertise so that you can get farther and you could also be happier in the day and the moment. So that, I would say, is something that is so important this year as you continue on with your business goals and you really want to end the year strongly. 00:25:59 Melissa: You don't want to end the year in a way that you're totally zapped and fried and not able to enjoy the holidays. No, you want to have a tool in order to nip overwhelm in the bud because it is something that is so common in our mom, life and our business life. And I want you to be able to have a proactive plan because it's so common, right? We know it's common, so we wanna be prepared and playing is the answer. 00:26:30 Melissa: And that is what's helped me as far as having a coaching practice and having three children and also having a podcast where there are so many moving parts. And trust me, this can be a source of overwhelm. And for me, I have figured out how to be more playful, such as The Floor is Lava. And I promise you, that is a really kick butt song. And I encourage you also to just imagine for yourself, like what would be possible if you could do anything that you wanted to do without having to struggle with overwhelm. 00:27:07 Melissa: And I really do believe that while the world might suggest other options for anxiety and overwhelm, such as meds and all these other options, I do believe that we actually have some resources locked up inside of us and so do our kids. So this is an opportunity for you to leverage this resource, this spirit of playfulness. And honestly, it works. It just works. It really does when it comes to business, when it comes to networking and when it comes to my mom, life. 00:27:40 Melissa: So here's something that I want to be sure that I always say. Okay. If you are watching me on YouTube, this is the moment where you absolutely tell me that you got value out of this conversation. Please hit the bell notification. You are going to then instantly get next week's video. Also hit subscribe. That is going to make me so happy and you can be playful about it. You can sing and hum as you do. 00:28:07 Melissa: So if you are listening to this, let's be official. Let's change your relationship status from just listening to following. Go ahead and click the follow. I would love to know that this is a nice weekly ritual for you. Again, mom founders, this is about our imagination. Playing is critical to our imagination. Our imagination likes to play. And this is a tool you can use at the drop of a dime the next time that you feel like you're on the edge of overwhelm. Thank you again. And until next Tuesday.
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245: Boost Your Revenue: Must-Know Tips for Female Entrepreneurs to Monetize Podcast Appearances
Ever give your all in podcast interviews but wonder why they're not boosting your business? Imagine if you could take those appearances—even the ones gathering dust—and turn them into powerful, revenue-driving assets. Sounds pretty good, right? Today, I'm chatting with the brilliant Beth Nydick, a media expert and mom founder, to get all the juicy details on how to turn those podcast interviews, even the ones from years ago, into powerful tools for growth. Beth and I chat about everything from the art of storytelling to making sure you stand out as both a podcast guest and host. And trust me, if you're juggling motherhood and entrepreneurship, this episode is packed with actionable tips to make sure your time spent on podcasts is actually moving the needle for your business. Plus, I share some of my own experiences (yep, even the messy ones) because I'm all about keeping it real. So whether you're a seasoned podcaster or just thinking about hopping on a mic, you won't want to miss this one. Let's make sure every podcast appearance counts, shall we? Tune in, and let's get those creative juices flowing! 🎙️✨ In this episode, you will hear: Using podcast interviews strategically to drive traffic and boost revenue, even from years-old episodes. How storytelling can create a deep emotional connection with the audience, Being relatable and authentic to create meaningful connections with your audience. Revisiting, resharing, and collaborating on old podcast interviews for renewed promotion. How to engage the audience effectively rather than just looking good or using hard sales tactics. Using checklists and routines to consistently maximize podcast benefits. Breaking from conventional rules and staying true to what feels authentic for your brand, both in podcasting and business. This episode is brought to you by a LIVE free masterclass How to Craft a Focused Year-End Networking Strategy to Build Profitable Relationships in 30 Days Without Draining Your Mom Energy. Back to school for moms? Join me LIVE on September 23, 2024 or September 24, 2024! Sign-up HERE: https://www.melissallarena.com/masterclass/ Be the first to hear when the DOORS officially open to this FREE masterclass for mom founders. You'll get a workbook upon signing up so you can start to warm up your profitable relationship building skills before you need them and for showing up LIVE you'll get my very own plug-and-play 30-day networking planner! How's that for a gift? More about this LIVE free masterclass: How to Craft a Focused Year-End Networking Strategy to Build Profitable Relationships in 30 Days Without Draining Your Mom Energy. You want to build profitable relationships without draining your energy for family and business. Imagine if family time and business could fuel each other rather than deplete you. Maybe you've been filling your cup instead of depleting it? I faced the same challenge. I learned to balance being a great business owner and mom while building profitable relationships in my 13-year career. I can help you make this a reality. Hi, I'm Melissa Llarena, bestselling author, podcaster, mom of three boys (including twins), and CEO of a coaching business in Austin, TX. I started my business with my firstborn at six months and, later with twins, struggled with distractions. I discovered that while some founders might reach goals faster, I didn't need to sacrifice my vision. I focused on building profitable relationships, a more consistent path to income than ads or social media algorithms. This approach expanded my reach, boosted my message, and increased my credibility. Plus, my method saves time by skipping gatekeepers, eliminating the need for warm intros or happy hours. This is what sets my method apart. I created a repeatable networking strategy for moms using my "Imagination to Impact to Income Method™." This strategy transformed how I manage time and energy and will be the focus of my LIVE masterclass entitled How to Craft a Focused Year-End Networking Strategy to Build Profitable Relationships in 30 Days Without Draining Your Mom Energy. My mission is to help moms creatively build their business while embracing motherhood. Profitable relationships align with both your business and family goals. I'll show you how in the masterclass to close the year strong. Attend LIVE and get a 30-day Profitable Networking Planner™! No more guessing how to connect with the right people. By the end of the class, you'll learn to: - Reimagine your company vision to energize you. - Find a clear relationship-building focus for your business's potential. - Overcome impostor syndrome to become unstoppable. Learn a proven plan to turn contacts into connections, even if you're an introvert. It helped me land GaryVee on my podcast, write books, and secure major sales, including a collaboration with the world's first IVF baby. I'll share this in the masterclass. Ready to add this to your calendar! Sign-up to be the first to know when the doors OPEN for this LIVE free masterclass! https://www.melissallarena.com/masterclass/ Let's turn ON your superpower LIVE! -Melissa Llarena About Beth Nydick Beth Nydick is the founder of The F.A.M.E. LAB and a top media expert specializing in helping coaches, experts, and authors amplify their brand presence. Known for her strategic approach, Beth turns media exposure into profitable opportunities, ensuring her clients not only gain attention but also achieve significant financial success. Her expertise spans crafting niche strategies at the intersection of media and monetization, driving traffic, and converting exposure into tangible results. Featured in major outlets like OPRAH, Forbes, and The Drew Barrymore Show, Beth is also the co-author of the popular cookbook Clean Cocktails: Righteous Recipes for the Modern Mixologist. Quotes, that can change your perspective: "Women that I was speaking to said something to the effect of like thank you for getting on the phone with me or I'm so honored or I can't believe you're talking to me. And I was like why? Like I'm not above you. I just know different things." - Beth Nydick "How are you engaging them enough to engage with you? And that's what I think people don't focus on, especially on podcast interviews." - Beth Nydick "It doesn't matter when it happened. It doesn't matter when you did it. Promoting it over and over again, if it's good content, is what I want you to think about and what I want you to focus on." - Beth Nydick "We tell stories so that people can take away certain points. Because for me it really is all strategy. I'm telling you a story because I want to evoke a feeling and it's something I've sat down and intentionally thought about." - Beth Nydick SHARE this episode with anyone aiming to boost revenue through podcast appearances! Discover how to make the most of every interview, drive traffic, and turn guest spots into profit. Don't keep these insights to yourself—spread the word and help others elevate their podcast game! Supporting Resources: Website: https://www.bethnydick.com Instagram: @bethnydick Twitter: @bethnydick Facebook: @bethnydick Beth Nydick's $10K Podcast Interview Checklist Subscribe and Review Have you subscribed to my podcast for new moms who are entrepreneurs, founders, and creators? I'd love for you to subscribe if you haven't yet. I'd love it even more if you could drop a review or 5-star rating over on Apple Podcasts. Simply select "Ratings and Reviews" and "Write a Review" then a quick line with your favorite part of the episode. It only takes a second and it helps spread the word about the podcast for writer moms.
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244: Genuine Connections vs. Traditional Networking: Strategies for Mom Founders Without the Sleaze
Ever wonder why networking events feature few mothers starting businesses? I have been thinking about this for the past 13 years and am ready to explain why it is so important to me. Often feeling like the lone mother in the room, I started to wonder why more amazing mother entrepreneurs weren't out there networking? Here's what I've heard: "The kids are getting ready for bed, and happy hours are as sleazy as a meat market," is what I've overheard. 🧐 "I don't have time to schmooze, and as an introvert, I stick to the hors d'oeuvres table." 🧐 "Networking feels awkward, and I never follow up with people I meet." Send me a DM https://www.instagram.com/melissallarena/ if you've ever had one of those thoughts stop you from going to a networking event? These incredible moms are running businesses with a purpose, and they want to change the world through the products they sell, the organizations they support, and the lives they touch. They are, however, passing up networking chances that may prove invaluable to the development of their businesses. I go into detail on how networking has changed my career trajectory. Networking has done wonders for my business, opening doors to virtual coffee conversations, podcast guest spots, and public relations chances. I'll share personal stories about how connecting with new people and stepping out of my comfort zone made a huge difference for me—and why I believe you can experience the same benefits. Join me as I explore ways to make networking easier, more enjoyable, and more effective for all you amazing mom founders out there! In this episode, you will hear: Why conventional networking events often feel impractical and inauthentic for mom entrepreneurs balancing business and family. Insights into alternative networking approaches that resonate more with mom founders, such as virtual coffee chats. The journey to pure authenticity and its pivotal role in effective networking. Power of stillness, playful interactions, and creative expressions in reawakening imagination for genuine connections. A compelling story of a powerful attorney who overcame her networking insecurities through personalized strategies. Concept of the "lifetime value of a connection" and its importance for mom founders. Strategies for fostering non-transactional, mutually beneficial relationships over time. A heartwarming case study of a relationship that evolved from a simple survey response to a lasting friendship. Advantages and challenges of being an introvert in the world of networking. How introverts can effectively leverage their unique strengths to build true connections. Significance of reconnecting with old acquaintances who share similar business goals. Encouragement for mom founders to confidently reach out and establish connections, even if they feel they have little to offer at the moment. Practical advice on creating your own networking opportunities and embracing your authentic self in business interactions. This episode is brought to you by Fertile Imagination to Networking Success, my 9-week group coaching program for visionary mom founders who have decided they are going to become power strategic networkers because they do not want to miss out on one more opportunity for maximum business growth! A program for a founder who wants a step-by-step process that works. My approach which I have used over and over and helped my client use too is called the Imagination to Impact and Income Method ™ and it will help you connect with right people, lead the right conversations, and swing open the right doors to success. If you want to learn more, then schedule a free call on www.melissallarena.com/sessions today. DM me on Instagram @melissallarena just type the word SESSION and I'll share the link if that's easier to see my calendar availability for this free call where you will get all the details you'll need to know if this program is the perfect fit for you and to hear about the extra bonuses available only this summer to the first mom founders who join. Here's that link: https://www.instagram.com/melissallarena/ About Melissa Llarena I'm a bestselling author (learn more on www.fertileideas.com), imagination coach behind the Fertile Imagination to Networking Success Group Coaching Program, consultant, speaker, contributor to ForbesWomen articles that have garnered 4 million-plus views, and the podcast host of the Mom Founder Imagination Hub. Featured guests include GaryVee, Beth Comstock, Suzy Batiz, David Meltzer, and hundreds of other unconventional thinkers. Melissa has been featured in the WSJ, Business Insider, Fox Business, CNN Money, The Huffington Post, and other publications. She holds a psychology degree from NYU, an MBA from the Tuck School of Business at Dartmouth, and a Transformational Coaching Academy certificate and is training to become a meditation practitioner. Melissa lives in Austin, Texas, with her husband and three sons (one singleton and a set of identical twins). Quotes from Melissa , that can change your perspective: "Genuine connections. I think that's what a lot of mom founders are striving for." "More than that, they're also open to having a sincere conversation with the real you." "So when it comes to forging a genuine connection, and it comes to making networking work for you as a mom. Really, it's about bringing your personality and your enthusiasm beyond your business' capabilities but including your mom-side too." "So the spark for me to think how I could introduce myself to then create a genuine connection, it comes from a place of expansive thinking and that is step one as it relates to the networking that actually works for a mom founder." "If you feel like you're getting hugs from people, if you feel like you're yourself, you're going to make it a habit. A recent client was met with HUGS at a networking conference and it took all the nerves out for her. Imagine what's possible for you if you applied some of the pre-networking research and outreach guidance in this episode?" - Melissa Llarena "Your relationship, because again, if you're going to be reimagining it as less about you and more about others is going to be long-term and that's the beauty. You can create a genuine connection today that can even help your kids later. This reframe is why I want more mom founders to intentionally network." -Melissa Llarena "If you feel that networking is sleazy and transactional, you're freaking right." -Melissa Llarena SHARE this episode and schedule a free session with me this week if you believe your mission deserves more. Discover how to turn your networking struggles into opportunities that can transform your business and life. In our 30-minute call, you'll gain insights into how you might be approaching networking incorrectly and how to improve. Learn how to own your networking approach, be bolder, and feel confident. Visit melissallarena.com/sessions to book your complimentary session and start making impactful connections today! Supporting Resources: Schedule a free call to see if Fertile Imagination to Networking Success my signature program is the right fit: https://www.melissallarena.com/sessions/ Podcast: Mom Founder Imagination Hub: https://www.melissallarena.com/podcast/ Instagram: https://www.instagram.com/MelissaLlarena/ Or, grab for free your copy of the "From Contact to Connection: The Mompreneur's Go-First Networking & Follow Up Playbook": https://witty-thinker-2643.ck.page/21e52edb87 Subscribe and Review Have you subscribed to my podcast for new moms who are entrepreneurs, founders, and creators? I'd love for you to subscribe if you haven't yet. I'd love it even more if you could drop a review or 5-star rating over on Apple Podcasts. Simply select "Ratings and Reviews" and "Write a Review" then a quick line with your favorite part of the episode. It only takes a second and it helps spread the word about the podcast for writer moms. TRANSCRIPT 00:00:00 Melissa: This relationship is going to be long term and the sort of value that you might add up front might not be the same as what you can add later on. So don't cut yourself out of those opportunities and also don't stop yourself because you don't think you have anything to contribute. 00:00:00 Melissa: Welcome to the Mom Founder Imagination Hub, your weekly podcast to inspire you to dream bigger. Plan out how you're going to get to that next level in business. Find the energy to keep going and make sure your creative juices are flowing, so that this way you get what you really want rather than having to settle. Get ready to discover how mom founders have re-imagined entrepreneurship and motherhood. Ever wonder how they do it? 00:00:40 Melissa: Tune in to find out and stretch yourself by also learning from diverse entrepreneurs, who might not be moms, but who have lessons you can tailor about how you can disrupt industries and step way outside of your comfort zone. I believe every mom's superpower is her imagination. In this podcast, I'm gonna give you the mindset, methods and tools to unleash yours. Sounds good? Then keep listening. 00:01:09 Melissa: Genuine connections. I think that's what a lot of mom founders are striving for. I was talking to a mom founder the other day. I think she's been in business for like 15 years and I mentioned the word Networking. And for her, it was like something that was sleazy, it was transactional, inauthentic, and it just didn't align with why she had a business. She was led by a mission, she had an ambitious mission, she also had a lot of, you know, heart and soul in terms of the message that she wants to put out in the world. And so there was a conflict there, right? 00:01:45 Melissa: So let's talk about in this episode, specifically for you, a mom founder, someone who nurtures her family, someone who nurtures her business, someone who absolutely has opted to create something that is deeply meaningful because again, it is time away from your kids. So it has to reach a certain criteria. Let's talk about how networking is getting a bad rap and how what I help mom founders do is nothing like traditional networking. I mean, it is the reason why I got into this. 00:02:19 Melissa: Here's a story, and let me know if this resonates because I think a lot of us as we go out there and go to these happy hours, there's so much that is just left to the imagination; hoping was actually there. One of them is authenticity. That is what I've noticed in a lot of happy hours, just like the regular run of the mill, after work situations, right? So you know, when it comes to what I have been doing over the last 12 years as a coach to mom founders, ones that I want to really get good at building connections with the right people faster while skipping gatekeepers and not relying on warm intros, which tend to take a ton of time, is this. 00:03:04 Melissa: I have been, you know, in attendance of, a lot of these happy hours. I have been really scouring the earth, it feels like it, since I lived in Australia and now I live in Austin, that, you know, there are communities for just about everyone when it comes to physical in-person real life events. But when I go to these events, which are amazing, there are not a lot of mom founders there, and here are the reasons why a lot of us are not out there. Some of them are, like, so obvious, and that is why I wanted to approach networking in a totally different way, where we're using our imagination, hence the name of this podcast. 00:03:45 Melissa: So here are some of the excuses or reasons, again, they're just valid. They're totally valid if you're limited by what you've heard about networking. So here's one, it's my kids' bedtime and happy hours are just meat markets. I totally get it and I totally, been there. Here's the other thing, I don't have time to schmooze and as an introvert, I just stick around with the hors d'oeuvres all night. I get that too. I know a lot of introverts personally. I'm an ambivert, which I talk about in my group coaching program, which is someone who can adjust according to situations. 00:04:26 Melissa: But I understand how you might want to prefer staying home than being around people that you don't know, and that you have no idea are going to actually help you. Here's the other reason why a lot of mom founders do not network in the traditional sense. So again, I'm thinking about going to golf courses or going to BNI meetings or attending whatever other, you know, local community events that there might exist. So networking feels awkward and I never follow up with the people I meet. 00:04:57 Melissa: Have you ever dropped the ball? I wanna say that in like, this like blast format because I feel like a lot of us, myself included, so I'm imperfect when it comes to traditional networking, you know, really, we drop the ball sometimes, right? You meet all these people, maybe you didn't bring a pen, you didn't bring a pad, maybe you didn't figure out a way to actually get all those QR codes synced up with LinkedIn or whatever other database you use. And then you just don't follow up with really amazingly interesting people. 00:05:27 Melissa: I get that, and that is the reason why over these last 12 years, I was like, there has got to be a different way, a better way, a way for me, for you as a mom founder, to use our imagination so that we can find another pathway to talk to the right people who could really help us take our business to the next level, so that this way, we can not miss out on those opportunities that are happening out there in the field. 00:05:54 Melissa: Instead, what about creating your own opportunity? What about inviting someone to your little office or little kitchen corner and having a coffee chat over Zoom? And that is a lot of what I do. And oftentimes people are so surprised that people who are, and it feels like above your weight category, are open to those sincere conversations. More than that, they're also open to having a sincere conversation with the real you. 00:06:28 Melissa: I know a lot of people who have launched businesses because when they worked for corporate or they worked for someone else, they were slapped on their wrists for being themselves, for bringing that loud laugh, for bringing that belly laugh, for being someone who, you know, just was themselves, right? And I wanna be sure that now that you have a business, my goodness, you have a business! It's your own business. Your name might be on the shingles outside metaphorically, that there's an alignment like you have never experienced in your past. 00:07:00 Melissa: So again, when it comes to networking, I really want to just drill deep into the fact that traditional networking, you're right, does not work for mom founders. Those excuses, they're real, they're legit. For a mom, as an example, if you're gonna network at a conference and you have to take a flight, and you have to then get a hotel, you also have to, almost like, run your family through a telephone call here, there, and everywhere. So there's a lot of nuance and the bar is higher when it comes to deciding whether or not to network traditionally for you. 00:07:41 Melissa: And so I get it, and that's why I wanna fix it. I wanna be sure that you are in a position of power and maximum creativity to actually find your own way to network. Even if you're an introvert, even if you're someone who, you know, doesn't have all the outfits because you just had a baby, even if you feel like, you know, you don't even know where your iron is because you lost it or something, I mean, I want there to be a way. And when there is a will, there is a way. 00:08:08 Melissa: So here we go, okay! So why is networking so important to a mom founder very, very specifically? So here's what I have realized. I have had conversations with mom founders who are in different incubators, who are out there, you know, creating products, could be a skincare line that is natural because they found some sort of need for that in the market. And they have shared with me that they hate networking and that they feel like it's a boys club and they feel like all the opportunities, you know, to get funding are given to men and all they have to do is draw a little, you know, icon or whatever, or a business model on a napkin, right? Think about Southwest Airlines. 00:08:54 Melissa: And then, I thought to myself, well, I don't believe that to be true. I don't believe it to be true that there's this like, captive audience that is privy to opportunities, that a mom founder cannot figure out a way with the use of her imagination and my method, into even before those conversations or those beautiful napkin drawings. And I think it takes a lot of persistence. 00:09:20 Melissa: So I'm not going to lie about that. I do know that it also takes a lot of creativity and you cannot leave your personality out the door. Because when you are at your most stressed out moment, the real you is going to come out. So you want to be sure that up front you introduce yourself as the real you. 00:09:38 Melissa: So let's talk about networking and let's talk about how through my process and the way that I approach networking, you can have those genuine connections that are not transactional, not sleazy and actually produce a lot of fruit. 00:09:53 Melissa: So here we go, I was scouring LinkedIn the other day, and I noticed that a wonderful person, his name is [Vinny] and I'll share why I named his name in a bit. He basically was celebrating his birthday and on LinkedIn, he decided to do something that was so, so, so generous. And so his act of generosity was inviting all his contacts to just list in the comments on the day of his birthday what it is that they needed and maybe, someone in their network could help them. 00:10:22 Melissa: And when I saw that, I saw that as an opportunity to network. And when I say network, what I mean by that is to talk to the right people, have the right conversations, and see if there's some sort of alignment between what that person wants and what I have to offer. And so I decided, again, this was all proactive, all taking the initiative, a lot of you, mom founders do the same thing in different categories of your life. 00:10:51 Melissa: And I decided to introduce myself to this complete stranger. So happens that he has a podcast, doesn't so happen because I looked at his profile on LinkedIn, but he has a podcast that is for small businesses, and it is by Experian. And so you may have heard Experian, and he was basically not actively looking for guests on that small business podcast. However, I presented myself and I basically said I would like the opportunity to be a guest on your podcast. 00:11:21 Melissa: And that was all because, a shared connection, the guy named [Vinny] had put on his birthday on LinkedIn, this opportunity, you know, chime in and say what you need on LinkedIn. And when I saw that, I acted upon that. So that is part of the networking that I teach my [mom founder] clients. It is not like, let me talk to this person totally from nowhere and absolutely not say why I think they're like, so, so cool. 00:11:48 Melissa: So this is how I approached this guy from Experian. And the reason why I'm gonna share this story with you is because that person I have a podcast interview with in like the next half hour. And he pointed out my process in a way that I had not realized before. It was this. So again, the guy was [Vinny] that we both knew and my outbound email to this person, this podcast, included the following. We both know [Vinny] and know he is not my cousin. That was a joke, right? 00:12:21 Melissa: That is how I led the conversation with someone that works for an organization, who is not an entrepreneur, but with whom I would like to do business. How is it that I had the confidence to be myself in that initial interaction? Here is how. Having partnered with so many mom founders in the past, I know the sort of email spammy pitches we get on places like LinkedIn. I also know being a podcaster, how a lot of these like top notch head honcho people, our approach on different, you know, channels, right? 00:12:55 Melissa: So for example, when I interviewed Beth Comstock, the former CMO of GE, I know that the prior emails that she got on LinkedIn were super spammy and authentic. So I knew that I could cut through that noise and be myself. And as a mom, as someone who's so genuine in her at-home life, it is so hard and so much extra energy to play someone that you're not just because traditional networking would have you be someone that you're not. And I don't want that for you. 00:13:29 Melissa: So when it comes to forging a genuine connection and it comes to making networking work for you as a mom, really it's about bringing your personality and your enthusiasm, not just for what you sell, but for that person that you're reaching out to, and it's gotta be legit. Otherwise people smell b*llshit and you don't want to have that out there. 00:13:51 Melissa: Okay, so let me share with you a little bit about my method because I think it's gonna really help frame the entire context. So in my method, it is called the imagination to impact to income method. And so it's a step-by-step solution that is gonna help you create genuine relationships consistently and quickly for mom founders, just like you. And so when it comes to imagination, that is where your personality comes into play right? So you want to be yourself. How can you get to that place of pure authenticity? 00:14:26 Melissa: Well, sometimes when it comes to, like reawakening my imagination, which for a lot of us, it's a sleep because we've got a lot going on and we're distracted. For me, sometimes it's a moment of stillness. Sometimes it's just, you know, singing in my shower. Sometimes it is playing with my child and explaining to my child who I am, what I do in very, very simple terms, so the spark for me to think how I could introduce myself to then, create a genuine connection, it comes from a place of expansive thinking. And that is step one, as it relates to the networking that actually works for a mom founder, right? 00:15:05 Melissa: So for someone who's so passionate about her product or service, to then follow this like, totally like predictable, conventional way of introducing yourself and being super boring and not distinguishing yourself, it doesn't make sense. And it's not going to work, and it's why you won't do it consistently, because oftentimes you think to yourself, this doesn't feel right. This feels sleazy, but there's another way. And through my method and with my support, I can help you actually figure out how to use this new way of networking, which is about being authentic and being super intentional and thoughtful and planning it out based on the real you. 00:15:43 Melissa: Because again, as a mom founder, you are very specifically stretched, stretched beyond capacity oftentimes. The bandwidth that we have that we're operating with, is very limited, and if you have to pretend to be someone you are not, that is taking up your bandwidth and you don't have enough to go around. So you want to be sure that you optimize your approach, whether it is in networking, business development, going and pitching yourself to media. The same concept applies and I could help you throughout any of those scenarios. 00:16:15 Melissa: So let me share with you this other idea. So I love this. This is when, like there's like the mom difference in how to approach networking and make it not sleazy at all, like totally warm and fuzzy, but so effective and very profitable. So a client of mine was really, really thinking about this whole idea. Okay, I'm going to a conference. I really don't know, kind of, how to approach it. I feel a little insecure in terms of, like the outfits I'm wearing, I haven't gotten out in a bit and I am just like not knowing what to expect, this is the first time away from my family. So that was the scenario. 00:16:51 Melissa: And what we did was, I applied a multi-step process. So before you actually attend a conference, go to an event or talk to someone, there is certain research that needs to be done so that you don't waste your time, so that you can squeeze the juice out of that situation, right? And again, this is so tailored for a mom founder. You have limited energy and when you go somewhere, it needs to actually prove out an ROI for you. So you wanna be sure you do all this research upfront. 00:17:21 Melissa: Part of that, and this is such a sneak peek into my group coaching program. So Fertile Imagination to Networking Success is the group coaching program that I run. But what I do is I have my clients look at, like, the speaker list at an event or like the people that are going to be on panels. And also, you know, if there's an app for the event, look to see who's going to go there, but I have my clients pre-introduce themselves to the people that make sense, given the alignment with their goals or just your curiosity because you're human. There are some people that are really interesting and why not, like pre-introduce yourself. 00:18:02 Melissa: So she attends this event and I had not seen this because I had not attended events with my clients. But I saw that, like people wanted a hugger. People wanted a hugger. People felt like they already knew her. And you know what it did for the client? She used to be scared of attending these networking events. And I wanna just add some context here. She was a powerful attorney, so she was scared. What does that tell you? That tells you that when you are mission-driven, when your business is so personal to you, even if you have, like, the world's fanciest degree, or you might have, like, all the money in the world for whatever reason, like, some of these little insecurities, they pop up and they could hold you back. 00:18:45 Melissa: So imposter syndrome, it is real. Even if you have, like, a JD, LLM, MBA, whatever sort of alphabet you wanna put after your name. And so for her, she was getting hugs. Like how is that traditional networking? It's not, it's not. It's what I teach my mom founders through my group coaching program, and one-on-one coaching programs too. And I love it, I love it because if you feel like you're getting hugs from people, if you feel like you're yourself, you're going to make it a habit. You're gonna be more consistent because it's gonna feel more like, with ease. 00:19:18 Melissa: And I think that's a big difference because I know a lot of times you start networking. You're like, all right, I'm getting really good at it. I'm doing it, I'm doing it, I'm doing it. And then you stop. And why is it that you saw? Because it's taking extra energy, because it's outside of your comfort zone, because you have to now think of things that you never thought about before. I get it, and that's why I wanted to fix it for mom founders. You know why? Mom founders, the ones that I've helped and I supported, they have the most wonderful products and services. And oftentimes it comes out of a need that I'm in alignment with. 00:19:50 Melissa: For example, if you go and build out a TV show that is to help children eat more nutritiously, like I am all for you. Or if you go and you decide to do a nonprofit because you see that there's a challenge in the world, like I am so there. Like it's really interesting. The bar is high when it comes to a mom who decides to actually lay the foundation of a business, because it's time away from your kids. So oftentimes, the degree of fulfillment that you seek in terms of your business is super, super high. 00:20:24 Melissa: And in those cases, I want to help you because that means that you want to make an impact. That means that you're not just selling something that's a throwaway item, you're selling something that means something to you, means something to the person that's purchasing it or donating. And I want to be part of that. And so that's why I was like, you know what, I'm not seeing enough moms in these situations; and whether or not they're right for you or you can do it in this season of motherhood, there's always another way. 00:20:48 Melissa: The other day I was talking to a mom who is a bookkeeper and she has this wonderful agency and she's like so streamlined. And what I thought was really fascinating was, there was an event that was happening at a particular time. She's a single mom and she could not attend the event. And so that invited me to then tell her, well, is there another way that you could get in touch with those event organizers? Is there another way that you can get that information? There is another way. 00:21:14 Melissa: And again, that's where the imagination piece of my method comes into play. So what is that other way for you? And I gave her a, insight. If you wanna hear that insight, a little bit about that more later. Okay, so here's the whole thing. You're different. You're just different. You just are, you have all these obligations and you have a lot of things that are outside of your control. So what does that mean? That means that when you're gonna go and build a relationship, for you, it has to be a high value relationship. 00:21:42 Melissa: And let me explain exactly what that means. You know how a lot of businesses, they have the lifetime value of a customer, or you know, how they have, you know, this notion of like one person can keep shopping, you know, your products and services. Well, I have taken that concept and I've turned it around. And for me, it's really about the bond or the connection. So instead of the lifetime value of a customer, the lifetime value of a connection. And I think that is how a mom can make networking work for her. What does that mean? 00:22:13 Melissa: That means that when you are there and making a… forging a connection with a human being one time, the idea is that you're gonna stick around for a long time, right? So it's not just, like, transactional. Right now you're gonna help me and I'm gonna say, peace out, thank you for the help. That's not it at all. That is not how you're gonna optimize all that effort it takes to even like, find the right people and make the right connection and have the right conversations. Instead, you have to consider the long view, the long term, right? So how is it that you're going to increase the value of that bond? 00:22:47 Melissa: And that's what I call, this idea of having a relationship with someone when you start to network with them. What does that mean? So that means that, I want to be sure that partnering with me, being with me, hanging out with me is better for the two of us than us being apart, right? And so I say that in my group coaching program, Fertile Imagination to Networking Success. It's really about thinking to yourself, okay, so here we are, it's, you know, 2024, and I might not yet be like this, like, fancy schmancy entrepreneur. And I might not be able to reciprocate or pay you back for whatever favor or situation that we're in right now, but I've got the long-term view in our relationship. 00:23:27 Melissa: Again, it's about being genuine, not sleazy, not transactional, not one-time. And I have a sense that I'm going to be able to help you later on in time, and that should give you some confidence, right? A lot of times people are hesitant to reach out to people that are outside of their weight category, so to speak, in terms of networking, because you don't feel like you have enough to contribute right now. But if like a mom, you started thinking about every situation that you're in and relationship that you have in the long term, you will always be able to make it up in the long term. Let me share a case study with you. 00:24:00 Melissa: So this was early, maybe like 2013 or so. I put out a survey to my newsletter and I asked questions pertaining to entrepreneurship, very long time ago. And I got a survey result back that was like mind blowing. It was so detailed, so helpful that I had to get on the phone with the person who filled it out. Here's the best part. I think I was, yeah, this was like my kid, my first kid was a baby and I was not sleeping still. But I was like, you know what? I have to talk to this person. So I got on the phone, her name was Shadiah, and I wanted to just find out more about her. I didn't know her. 00:24:39 Melissa: And at the time she wasn't an entrepreneur, but she had the guts to reach out to me. She knew, she was like, you know what? I'm probably gonna stay in touch with Melissa, right? And I felt the same way about her. So when I was in San Francisco, I decided to see her in person. Again, this was after her filling out a survey, being super helpful, getting on the phone, and then me going to San Francisco. So, building upon the sincere, genuine relationship. And so I went, and Shadiah, just to kind of update that. So Shadiah, I met with her in San Francisco. And again, she was at that time launching HoneyBook, I believe, and you may have heard of it. And she was amazing, right? 00:25:18 Melissa: So I made the time to meet her in person, again, building that relationship, that bond. So slowly but slowly. She was speeding up in her entrepreneurial journey and I was slowing down at the time because I was then gonna have identical twins. And so it kind of felt like the roles were a little turned, right? So now she starts, like increasing her perceived value even though as humans we always come into this world with value, but from a business perspective right? The relationships that she had, the conversations that she was having, her success entrepreneurial. So it was changing. 00:25:48 Melissa: Then recently, I noticed that she now has a company called Kinside and she is on the ink list of top 100 most inspiring companies out there. And I know she's funded and there's some sort of valuations out there that are like over a billion dollars. So at this point, you know, I say this because, you know, Shadiah early on had the guts to reach out to me, right? We were in different situations at the time. Now she's a mom, and now we get to talk about mom stuff. And I also want to just say that your relationship, because again, if you're going to be taking networking and you're going to be flipping it around for yourself, and I can teach you how to do it, this relationship is going to be long term. 00:26:34 Melissa: And the sort of value that you might add up front might not be the same as what you can add later on. So don't cut yourself out of those opportunities. And also don't stop yourself because you don't think you have anything to contribute. So there are lots of ways that networking can be reframed for you, a mom founder. 00:26:53 Melissa: And I wanna invite you to the very next step, which I would welcome a conversation to get to know you. I wanna hear on a free 30 minute consultation, just go to MelissaLlarena.com/sessions. This is gonna be in the show notes, wherever you're listening, it's gonna be in the description on YouTube as well. I invite you to go ahead and apply for a free consultation. They're 30 minutes, they're exclusively for mom founders. And I want to hear what your networking plan is for the rest of this year. 00:27:24 Melissa: I want to know, like, how you're also embodying the real you when it comes to networking. I also want to know where there might be a little hesitation, right? So I feel like I could totally help you clear that out during that 30 minute session so that this way you could be a lot more enthusiastic about talking to strangers as you are about the product and service that you're bringing into the world. 00:27:48 Melissa: On this session, 30 minutes, complimentary, but there is that application. I also want to hear from you in terms of, you know, what do you struggle with, like specifically when it comes to putting yourself out there and networking? What relationship do you have with that word? Is it something that's really hard for you to do consistently? Have you been told maybe in the past that you shouldn't be, you know, that loud or you're a little too much, or you know, maybe you're some sort of undesirable characteristic that you're insecure about going out there, or if you're an introvert. If you're an introvert, we have got to talk. 00:28:26 Melissa: So go and head to the link, MelissaLlarena.com/sessions. If you're driving or running or moving around, just take notes when you have an opportunity. It'll be in the show notes, as I mentioned. And if you're on YouTube, you get to see my hat. I feel like I have, like a networking hat, which is a really fun tip. If you do go out there and network, have something that distinguishes you and is memorable, just like a visual cue. That's this hat I'm wearing, this beige hat. Some people that know me have seen me before with it. 00:28:57 Melissa: But for sure, I wanna have a conversation with you, a mom, founder, especially if you really think that networking is sleazy because it hasn't worked for you and you haven't been consistent with it because it doesn't feel authentic. The way that I can teach you to break free from that is through my method, the imagination impact income method. In that method, I also want to just leave you with this thought. 00:29:25 Melissa: I get that you might feel insecure about putting yourself out there with people that you don't have a warm intro to, or I get that you might think that, you know, being stopped by a gatekeeper is going to be part of your path. But with my method, I figured out a way around both. I also want to just leave you with this thought. The way that you feel is the way that you feel. I don't want you to feel wrong or bad about the way that you feel. 00:29:54 Melissa: So if you feel that traditional networking is sleazy and transactional, you're freaking right. Or if you feel that being an introvert is not advantageous for being, you know, a networker, then I actually wanna question you there because I know differently. I know that there's some superpowers that introverts have when it comes to networking that an ambivert like myself, and I could totally share that definition if we get on the 30 minute session, or an extrovert might not have. 00:30:23 Melissa: And so I am actually going to make that an episode on this podcast. So be sure that you follow me officially on whatever podcast platform you're listening to, this or subscribe here on YouTube. Either way you slice it, I want to hear from you. So go ahead, MelissaLlarena.com/sessions. 00:30:45 Melissa: Thank you. And until next Tuesday, be sure to share this, if this was of value. And you know what? It's a great excuse to reconnect with someone, maybe someone that you haven't spoken to in years, but who's going in the same direction as you are in terms of business. So I invite you to take this as your opportunity. So next step, let's hop on that free 30 minute consultation. Signing off, Melissa Llarena.
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243: Building a Venture-Backed or Lifestyle Business: Mom Founders Share Burnout-Free Strategies
Feeling stretched thin as a mom and entrepreneur? Let's talk about burnout and how to beat it! For me, finding that sweet spot between work and family fun is a game-changer. Imagine shooting hoops with your kids or diving into books you all enjoy—it's all about blending joy and quality time. Next up, we're super excited to have Liz Tenety join us! She's the brilliant co-founder of Motherly and the mastermind behind Founding Women. As a mom of five, Liz knows all about balancing the chaos of a big family with the grind of running a venture-backed startup. She's here to drop some major wisdom on managing your energy, why it's crucial to prioritize your well-being before chasing profits, and how to get creative with childcare and household support. Liz is all about a holistic approach to avoid burnout. She cautions that focusing solely on work and parenting can lead to neglecting friendships and personal wellness. Her advice? Blend work and home life seamlessly, involve the kids in chores, and don't hesitate to get help when needed. We'll also explore how to balance life and business, with Liz sharing tips on building a support team, from hiring a virtual assistant to arranging childcare swaps with other entrepreneur moms. Ready to learn from the best? Let's dive in! In this episode, you will hear: Actionable insights on managing energy and aligning family and business needs. Methods to keep burnout at bay, including investing in well being and child care before turning a profit. Creative ways to blend personal interests with parenting through enjoyable activities. Exploration of energy management techniques and the balance between narrow focus and holistic well being. Hiring resources early and fostering a collaborative family environment to reduce personal burnout. Liz's experience in creating supportive communities for female founders and translating business skills into effective motherhood. Identifying and managing daily parenting tasks and logistical challenges to prevent burnout. Ideas for reimagining work-life balance and parenting to create a sustainable and fulfilling life. Encouragement to build a support network and invest in well being for a successful business and family life. This episode is brought to you by a LIVE free masterclass How to Craft a Focused Year-End Networking Strategy to Build Profitable Relationships in 30 Days Without Draining Your Mom Energy. Back to school for moms? Join me on September 23, 2024 or September 24, 2024! Add your name to my newsletter HERE: https://fertileideas.com/ - this will do two things: you'll instantly receive my free networking playbook and be the first to know when the doors to my masterclass officially open! Be the first to hear when the DOORS officially open to this FREE masterclass for mom founders. As when they do, you'll get a workbook upon signing up so you can start to warm up your profitable relationship building skills before you need them and for showing up LIVE you'll get my very own plug-and-play 30-day networking planner! How's that for a gift? More about this LIVE free masterclass: How to Craft a Focused Year-End Networking Strategy to Build Profitable Relationships in 30 Days Without Draining Your Mom Energy. You want to build profitable relationships without draining your energy for family and business. Imagine if family time and business could fuel each other rather than deplete you. Maybe you've been filling your cup instead of depleting it? I faced the same challenge. I learned to balance being a great business owner and mom while building profitable relationships in my 13-year career. I can help you make this a reality. Hi, I'm Melissa Llarena, bestselling author, podcaster, mom of three boys (including twins), and CEO of a coaching business in Austin, TX. I started my business with my firstborn at six months and, later with twins, struggled with distractions. I discovered that while some founders might reach goals faster, I didn't need to sacrifice my vision. I focused on building profitable relationships, a more consistent path to income than ads or social media algorithms. This approach expanded my reach, boosted my message, and increased my credibility. Plus, my method saves time by skipping gatekeepers, eliminating the need for warm intros or happy hours. This is what sets my method apart. I created a repeatable networking strategy for moms using my "Imagination to Impact to Income Method™." This strategy transformed how I manage time and energy and will be the focus of my LIVE masterclass entitled How to Craft a Focused Year-End Networking Strategy to Build Profitable Relationships in 30 Days Without Draining Your Mom Energy. My mission is to help moms creatively build their business while embracing motherhood. Profitable relationships align with both your business and family goals. I'll show you how in the masterclass to close the year strong. Attend LIVE and get a 30-day Profitable Networking Planner™! No more guessing how to connect with the right people. By the end of the class, you'll learn to: - Reimagine your company vision to energize you. - Find a clear relationship-building focus for your business's potential. - Overcome impostor syndrome to become unstoppable. Learn a proven plan to turn contacts into connections, even if you're an introvert. It helped me land GaryVee on my podcast, write books, and secure major sales, including a collaboration with the world's first IVF baby. I'll share this in the masterclass. Ready to add this to your calendar! Sign-up to be the first to know when the doors OPEN for this LIVE free masterclass! https://www.melissallarena.com/masterclass/ Let's turn ON your superpower LIVE! -Melissa Llarena About Liz Tenety Liz Tenety is a dynamic founder, digital entrepreneur, and transformation coach dedicated to empowering ambitious women. As the co-founder of Founding Women, she supports female founders through expert-led small groups and accelerators. Liz previously served as the Chief Digital Officer and co-founder of Motherly, where she played a key role in growing the venture-backed startup to 30 million monthly users and significant revenue. With nearly 20 years in media and startups—including a decade at The Washington Post—Liz now leads Growth Mode, her growth consulting firm, and coaches at Blue Engine Collaborative and Georgetown University. Her passion lies in using design thinking, storytelling, and data to uplift women and mothers in business. Quotes, that can change your perspective: "Not having friends is actually a recipe for me for burnout, not focusing on pleasure and rest and play." - Liz Tenety "I realized, okay, wait a minute, instead of paying someone to watch my kids so I can clean, I should hire house help with that extra funds that I might have so that I could spend that time with my kids." - Liz Tenety "I don't know how to keep up with the competition if I'm not up front hiring resources before I make one dollar. Any other mom found a better way?." - Melissa Llarena "I feel your pain, and it's not easy to make these numbers work." - Liz Tenety "No great company is built alone. And in a lot of ways for me, I learn better how to run my family and think about what it means to lead a family by running a company" - Liz Tenety "You might get so much energy from hanging out with your loved ones. And why would you avoid that source of energy? You're a mom, there's finite energy." - Melissa Llarena SHARE this episode with anyone who's juggling the demands of motherhood and entrepreneurship! Whether you're seeking tips on avoiding burnout, balancing work and family, or building a support network, Liz Tenety's insights are gold. Let's spread the wisdom and help each other thrive—don't miss out! Supporting Resources: Website: https://foundingwomen.co Instagram: @liztenety Subscribe and Review Have you subscribed to my podcast for new moms who are entrepreneurs, founders, and creators? I'd love for you to subscribe if you haven't yet. I'd love it even more if you could drop a review or 5-star rating over on Apple Podcasts. Simply select "Ratings and Reviews" and "Write a Review" then a quick line with your favorite part of the episode. It only takes a second and it helps spread the word about the podcast for writer moms. About Fertile Imagination – www.fertileideas.com You can be a great mom without giving up, shrinking, or hiding your dreams. There's flexibility in how you pursue anything – your role, your lifestyle, and your personal and professional goals. The limitations on your dreams are waiting to be shattered. It's time to see and seize what's beyond your gaze. Let's bridge your childhood daydreams with your grown-up realities. Imagine skipping with your kids along any path – you, surpassing your milestones while your kids are reaching theirs. There's only one superpower versatile enough to stretch your thinking beyond what's been done before: a Fertile Imagination. It's like kryptonite for impostor syndrome and feeling stuck when it's alert! In Fertile Imagination, you will awaken your sleeping source of creative solutions. If you can wake up a toddler or a groggy middle schooler, then together with the stories in this book – featuring 25 guests from my podcast Unimaginable Wellness, proven tools, and personal anecdotes – we will wake up your former playmate: your imagination! Advance Praise "You'll find reality-based strategies for imagining your own imperfect, fulfilling life in this book!" —MARTHA HENNESSEY, former NH State Senator "Melissa invites the reader into a personal and deep journey about topics that are crucially important to uncover what would make a mom (and dad too) truly happy to work on...even after the kids are in bed." —KEN HONDA, best-selling author of Happy Money "This book is a great purchase for moms in every stage of life. Melissa is like a great friend, honest and wise and funny, telling you about her life and asking you to reflect on yours." —MAUREEN TURNER CAREY, librarian in Austin, TX TRANSCRIPT 00:00:00 Liz: I try to set up opportunities for play with my kids that I enjoy. I don't like board games. I just like, I don't like that. And I don't like terrible cartoon character books, the little books with Paw Patrol. Like aesthetically, like it offends me. So I try to like play a basketball. I love playing basketball with my son. So I'll try to do something with my child that I enjoy and read choose the book that is going to bring me pleasure to read with my kid. 00:00:33 Melissa: Welcome to the Mom Founder Imagination Hub, your weekly podcast to inspire you to dream bigger. Plan out how you're going to get to that next level in business. Find the energy to keep going and make sure your creative juices are flowing so that this way you get what you really want rather than having to settle. Get ready to discover how mom founders have reimagined entrepreneurship and motherhood. Ever wonder how they do it? Tune in to find out and stretch yourself by also learning from diverse entrepreneurs who might not be moms, but who have lessons you can tailor about how you can disrupt industries and step way outside of your comfort zone. I believe every mom's superpower is her imagination. In this podcast, I'm going to give you the mindset, methods, and tools to unleash yours. Sounds good? Then keep listening. 00:01:25 Melissa: Welcome, beautiful mom founder. So in today's episode, we're gonna go through burnout. Is there a way to avoid it? Is there a way to keep it at bay through energy management solutions that work for you and your family? Also, we're gonna go through building a business and how that might actually make you a more empowered mom who can design a family life that is almost like run like a business with heart, of course. We're also gonna go through investing in your wellbeing and why you might want to pay for the child care, pay for the VAs before you turn a profit. So the conversation today is something that I personally really needed. Today's guest is none other than the co-founder behind Motherly, current founder of Founding Women, a career community supporting female founders through expert led small groups and accelerators. The name of today's guest is Liz Tenety. 00:02:21 Melissa: I am thrilled to have her perspective. She's a mom of five and she knows what it takes in order to run a venture backed startup. She also knows what it takes in terms of the requirements that having a big family have on our energy levels and sources. So enjoy the conversation. Definitely. Let me know what you think in terms of the possibilities for you to almost piece together your own childcare solutions, piece together your own resources so that you can have that opportunity to invest in your wellbeing upfront, so that you can actually launch your business, build your business, scale your business, and make whatever vision you have for your business turn into a reality that you are better off for, you and your family. That's what it's about here. So enjoy the conversation. 00:03:17 Melissa: This episode is brought to you by a masterclass I want to formally and cordially invite you to on September 23rd. We're gonna go through a focused 30 day networking strategy that is gonna help you end the year strong. It is about having a company vision that energizes you. It is about, and we're gonna go through how to focus, where to apply your finite focus as a mom, and also how to actually navigate feeling like an imposter at times so that you get billed and really enhance the profitable relationships that are going to take your business to the next level. This is happening on September 23rd. I know, I know, right now we are just getting our kids back to school and that might not be on your top of mind list, but I want to just give you some of the details that we're going to run through. And I want to invite you to sign up today for my newsletter so that you're the very first to hear of when I opened the doors for this masterclass that will be live for one hour on September 23rd, which is a Monday. So just go to fertileideas.com. Go ahead and grab my free networking playbook while you're at it, and that will instantly put you on the list. So on September 23rd, here's what you're in for. 00:04:45 Melissa: You are going to 100% have a really good idea on how to make your company vision, which a lot of you might call your origin story or that description on your website that describes what you do, who you are and why, and have it work for you. Have it energize you, have it feel more aligned and have it almost like contribute to that pep in your step. The second thing we're going to do is we're going to narrow your focus. And here's what I mean by that. It is not about, you know, not, it's not about being in monk mode. It's not about going to a retreat in some cottage in Canada. No, it is about understanding what you need to accomplish to make the end of this year, 2024, align with what you had originally intended this year to look like in terms of your revenue, in terms of your business, in terms of whatever creative endeavor you have out there. And the third point, which I mentioned a little earlier is, you know, on a path to building a business, there are moments where you might start second guessing yourself. You might encounter self doubt that mental chatter that I don't know if I'm ready might pop up. I want you to have a proactive plan this year so that the end of the year, you don't have regrets. I wish I would have, I wish I would have pressed send. I wish I would have published my book. I wish I would have, you know, launched my podcast, I wish I would have asked for, you know, bigger donation dollars for my nonprofit. I don't want you to have that on your heart. 00:06:11 Melissa: I want you to be totally prepared and ready for a strong end to 2024. So quick, quick, quick to do go to fertileideas.com. That'll be in the show notes and sign up. Get the playbook while you're at it. I have a networking playbook that also helps you start to build profitable relationships and it is so useful whether you are an introvert or an extrovert or somewhere in between There's such a thing as an ambivert. So go ahead to fertile ideas comm get the playbook. Here's the thing I'm gonna be pricing it about $14.99 so you could totally wait and get it later, but today right now it is free for mom founders to go to fertileideas.com, that is how you get in my email newsletter and that is also how you have first persons access to the details around this masterclass that will be live will be on September 23rd and will be all for mom founders who want to end the year strong. 00:07:09 Melissa: So go ahead right now. I'll give you a second hit pause and sign up for the playbook. So you get on the newsletter and you're the first to know about this masterclass is going to change the way you end 2024. I look forward to seeing you there and enjoy the conversation with Liz Tennedy. I'm so excited that she joined me on The Mom Founder Imagination Hub. So Liz, I am so excited to have you here on the mom found her imagination hub. I love that you're putting on chapstick. That is so mom of you in the morning. How are you? 00:07:41 Liz: I'm great. I slept well last night and kids are healthy. The babysitter's here. We're nearing the end of summer break. So I'm feeling hopeful about the future, even the next couple of weeks. 00:07:56 Melissa: Yeah, I think they call it summer break, but I feel like we end up kind of breaking, if we don't have everything like structured out and our resources in place. And so I get it. I get it. But here's here's something that I would love to speak with you about in great depth, right? For as long as we have the time. Burnout. Let's let's like dive deeply into burnout. I mean, in terms of your experiences and now with what you're doing with Founding Women, I know that it's top of mind. I know that it's part of, you know, wellness as a solution, but here's kind of my thought on burnout and I wanna hear what you think. So I feel like having a narrow focus is one way to kind of proactively address burnout or not get to that place. But then I also think, so I have lots of thoughts, but I'll just share my second and I'll stop there. I also think that we have different points at which we reach burnout. So I might reach burnout after X hours of work sitting down at my computer, whereas someone else might have a different burnout point. So here's the question I asked myself legit. How can I work really hard and long right before my burnout point so I don't get to that place where it's hard to get back? 00:09:22 Liz: I mean, it's such a huge, huge topic. I think something I always personally love to do is to zoom way out. And by that, I don't just mean for my own life. I actually mean like on the horizon of time and human history, how are humans doing work and life in other cultures, in other times, like a hundred years ago, 10,000 years ago? Because my own like little life hypothesis is that we're living in unbelievably unprecedented times, particularly for mothers in the West who, you know, live these nuclear family lives. They have less sort of social support than ever, right? And we also have in its place no structural support, no political support, no corporate culture support for motherhood to kind of put my own struggles and the struggles of other parents, but especially moms that I encounter like in this context of, sure, by a lot of measures, we have things better than in human history. 00:10:36 Liz: But if you look at other groups of measures like social support, belonging, meaning, I think we're actually really struggling. And so just knowing that helps me not feel so alone and feel like the struggle is real, like it's not just all up in my head. So that helps. And I'm always zooming out for my own problems and the daily struggles, because it really helps to put things in perspective for me. You mentioned narrow focus, which I find really interesting. And I don't know that I have like one answer. And frankly, I think any productivity guru who's giving you one answer or one framework is lying to you in different seasons of life. And I think that's particularly true for women and those who bear children that there's literally seasons that happen in your body and we need to respect them, but there's also seasons throughout the year. Capitalism acts like everything is always upward on the trajectory and it's not. We do need those seasons of rest and recovery that are just natural to being a human, especially being a woman, especially being a mother. So pushing back on that idea that it's always, you know, upwards. Anyway, get back to narrow focus. When I heard you talk about narrow focus, it reminded me of Greg McEwen's book, Essentialism, which I read, let's see, six years ago, and I found it so helpful, and I found it like such a relief. 00:12:10 Liz: I was running my startup at the time or venture back startup, we were in total growth mode. I mean, it was so intense every single day. I read it on vacation that I took. And one of the one of the anecdotes in that book is about a large family. I think I think it was a stay at home mom and like a traditional working, you know, in the office dad. I remember that they had six kids. And the story was that that couple had decided that for that season of life, they did not need to focus on their friendships, their social lives, okay? And they went really narrow. It's about raising the kids and running this household. Again, I get that. And that was so logical. So I kind of bought it into this idea of narrow focus, right? The only thing I told myself at that time that I had capacity for, the only things were taking care of my kids and running my startup. And I bought in on that. And what happened was I burned out. And I realized why. 00:13:12 Liz: And actually, Greg McEwen has written a follow-up book called Effortless, like critiquing his own framework here because then I realized, you know, in the pandemic and in the years that followed, as I approached 40, not having friends is actually a recipe for me, for burnout, not focusing on pleasure and rest and play. That I got so narrow that I didn't even allow myself to do things that were actually holistically good for me as a human being. So, and yeah, I'm attracted to the idea of like going narrow and not and letting certain things fall by the wayside. I do think depending on your season of life though, really looking holistically at like, what do I, what do I actually need to be refueled for this journey? 00:14:03 Liz: And kind of doing that 360 view of it is really critical. And I think for me, being too narrow and saying, oh, I don't have time for friends. I don't have time to work out. I don't have time for wellness. I'll prioritize that in a different season. That's actually ironically the thing that led me to burnout and then decide like, okay, I need a hard break with what, you know, the life that I've been living in a big reset, which is what I did about three years ago. 00:14:29 Melissa: Yeah. And it's interesting because when I talk about focus, what I mean is focusing on what gives you energy. And it doesn't necessarily mean taking everything off your plate. You might actually want to add things to your plate that energize you, like in your case, friendships, right? Or playing with your child, you know, playing pretend and things like that. That magical moment and experience can make you more excited when you're out there marketing, you know, your solution. And so I totally get what you're saying. I think our focus for what helps us avoid burnout. 00:15:11 Melissa: It's different. It's different from me. It's different for you, you know, like maybe, maybe I have social anxiety. I know some clients of mine, they suffer with that. And so the thought of them like going out in the world and such is draining on them, you know, but like virtual coffee chats as an example, might be really uplifting and helpful. So I think your point is perfect. Absolutely perfect. So let me ask you this question, because I feel like it's like the elephant in the room, right? For a lot of moms that found a business. So you mentioned two big, big, big things that were going on in terms of mothering your children, of which you have five, right? You have five. And running a business. So those two things, like I feel like the other side of it is, okay, how do you prevent burnout? I think we also have to be honest about the things in our lives that contribute to burnout that are not just you know, pitching clients or getting investors, but also untangling fights between siblings or schlepping someone from point A to point B and you know, there being traffic. And I don't have a spreadsheet that says, here are all the things that I think about that drain me from a family perspective, but I do have a list of to-dos from a business perspective. 00:16:34 Melissa: So looking at both sides, would you say that you have found in talking to founding women and learning about moms, through motherly and other means, have you found that maybe we're not being honest enough with the things that are really on our list? There are some invisible things that are not on our list that drain us. 00:16:54 Liz: I love that. Yeah, that makes so much sense. I love your framework around energy management and I think it's sort of surging as a concept and people are growing in their awareness of this idea of focusing on what you have energy for and the sources of energy drain so that you can be in that zone of genius more frequently. And also, you know, you mentioned playing with your kids. I got some great advice a decade ago from a friend and I've tried to practice it, which is that I try to set up opportunities for play for kids that I enjoy. I don't like board games. I just like, I don't like that. 00:17:36 Liz: And I don't like terrible cartoon character books, you know, the little books with like Paw Patrol, like aesthetically, like it offends me, you know? So I try to like play a basketball. I love playing basketball with my son. So I'll try to do something with my child that I enjoy and read, choose the book that is going to bring me pleasure to read with my kid. 00:18:00 Liz: So even in parenting, looking, taking inventory of how do I use that, even in the car. I want to put music on that I'm going to enjoy, that I'm going to get energy from. And, you know, they're kind of whining in the background because, like, they don't like my weird music. Like, I'm fine with that. I, you know, I am the driver. I am the parent. I'm going to decide that, you know, we're listening to music that I enjoy. You know, you also are reminding me of. Something that I talk to my husband about all the time, which is that we're trying to build a life for ourselves and an integrated work and life work business family that we haven't quite seen modeled in our you know, micro communities. 00:18:44 Liz: You know, we've seen it kind of out there vaguely with like influencers who kind of live that more integrated family lifestyle. And by that I mean like family businesses or having a unique work family blend or being digital nomads and that kind of thing, which we're not, but I find that general concept interesting. And that is this, that if we want to live a little bit more intentionally, a little bit more unconventionally, we are going to have to find solutions for our family that we haven't seen modeled. And so something I love about your work is just your appreciation for creative genius and outside of the box solutions. 00:19:30 Liz: But to get very specific, I realized a few years ago that I was hiring babysitters at nights or on the weekends so that I could catch up on housework or paperwork, you know, all the like logistics. So I realized, okay, wait a minute, instead of paying someone to watch my kids so I can clean, I should hire house help with that extra money. funds that I might have so that I could spend that time with my kids. And similarly, I recently hired a VA, a virtual assistant, right? So it's 600 bucks a month. I don't pay my bills anymore. They get paid, but my VA pays the bills, plans activities, buys tickets and airfare for trips. 00:20:18 Liz: Anything that's like weighing on me, even something this week I asked her to do was make sure the kids were signed up for the right bus for their school, all of that long, long, long, long list. I think of it like building scaffolding around our family where there's that long family list and I'm able to get support in things that aren't bringing me energy and that are taking away from my capacity to be focused on my kids at that time or on my work. The last part of where we are as a family with this I have to give my husband a lot of credit. We're working really hard in this season of life to get our kids much more actively involved in like solving the problems or the work of the family. 00:21:05 Liz: So having a heavier chore list for them, having them make sure they're doing their own laundry, having very clear assignments. In fact, last night my daughter was working on the meal plan and adding the ingredients to our grocery card on my phone. And so we think of it like a team. And when we think of our family as a team and as your kids get older, I'm finding it helpful and instructive and good for them to be more involved in making this team like function as a group. So those are some of the creative ways that I found to over time make this all work in a way that decreases my personal burnout. 00:21:49 Melissa: That makes sense, a lot of sense. I mean, I've definitely had someone that was talking about fair play and just, you know, making sure that everybody picks up different responsibilities and the mom, for the most part, doesn't feel so like, you know, out of control. So I totally hear what you're saying. I have to ask this question. It's something that is really pressing on my mind because a lot of the clients that I've supported. 00:22:14 Melissa: It's almost like they wait until a certain magic number from a revenue perspective or a certain magic age of their kids to start hiring any resources. Yeah. Right. So I heard and this could be totally fictional, but I heard one mom say, oh, I had a coach that said, you know, before, like, make $100,000 in your business and then hire a VA, for example. And so she split it in half. She said, how about $50,000 and then I hire a VA. Here's the chicken and egg question. It's like, as a mom, to be very brutally honest, I don't know how to keep up with the competition if I'm not upfront hiring resources before I make $1. Like help me untangle this. 00:23:11 Liz: I couldn't agree more and I don't presume to speak for other people's budgets and you know people have a wide variety of needs and things that they're paying for. I will say that you know as we've become parents, we were 27 when we became parents, we're about to turn 40 this year. So we make significantly more money today than we did you know when we were 27 and we had our first child and the vast majority of that income, the extra income that we made has been reinvested in quality childcare that makes our lives easier as parents in some housekeeping support. We have less now than we've had in the past because our kids are more capable. 00:23:53 Liz: But when I was working at the start or running my startup full-time, you know, I was not doing any housework. That was like a weekly job and or someone was coming in to do the laundry. We have looked at like school budgets, right? Like our kids haven't necessarily gone to the preschool that we really wanted them to go to because literally my husband showed me if you choose this preschool, we choose this preschool, like we can't have housekeeping support. So we chose like the more affordable option so that we could put that money back into having a housekeeper and help us with the laundry and the maintenance of our home. 00:24:34 Liz: So, and we don't take many vacations, if any, will go travel to visit our families. We've even started driving 10 hour trips, 12 hour trips to go visit family to cut down on the cost of our vacations because I truly believe that early investment in my wellbeing is the thing that's gonna allow me to build my next business and kind of align my professional life with the integrated family life that I really want. 00:25:03 Liz: That being said, like it's so, so hard out there for working moms. We lack affordable childcare. We lack maternity leave policies. So I have nothing but empathy and I want people to know that if they are just truly looking at their budgets and saying like, I can't make this work, it's not your fault. You know, we, we have to pay, is it in some cities, you know, twice the cost of housing for our childcare. And there's no other country on earth that asks this of families. 00:25:34 Liz: So, you know, I feel your pain and it's not easy to make these numbers work. That being said, reinvesting yourself is absolutely the best thing that you can do and, you know, do it flexibly. I've had certain VA services that didn't work out and I no longer work with them. The one that I'm using now is phenomenal and I'm recommending them to others. But there's a book called Design Your Life, which is out of the Stanford D school and this whole idea of using prototypes, right? Lightweight prototypes to find solutions is one that I think my husband and I have tried and applied. And we keep trying different solutions to make this work in our various stages of life. 00:26:15 Melissa: Yeah. I mean, I, it's so interesting because I think so much great thinking comes out of these world-class institutions, right? I know you're at Georgetown and for me, I have relationships with Tuck but what I will say the one really big missing piece of the puzzle is okay. So that's nice if you wanna work in a big corporate environment, go up the ranks, et cetera, or have a startup, I'm thinking about Stanford, right? With its entrepreneurial leanings. But then what happens when you've had no sleep? Or what happens when you have one child and then you have five, you know, there's all these changes that are not just logical spreadsheet solutions, but they're emotional conversations that a lot of founding moms have in our heads that take up our finite energy. 00:27:04 Melissa: Okay, so here's something else that I was super curious to hear your thoughts on. So asking for help and just, you know, resources. I was having this like conversation with a mom, you know, over me with the margarita, her with the tea, and she said, you know, I've met all these like moms that have these fabulous businesses and they have legions of support, legions. And that's not what I heard you say right now. I heard that it's quite the adjustable team building setup. Say more on maybe the first step. Like how can somebody just incrementally build a team so that they don't have to like go all out and think, oh, it's all or nothing. But you know, there's this one resource and second and third. 00:27:51 Liz: So I guess over the decade of that, I've been a mom and an entrepreneur, I've learned how to think really creatively about time. And you know, all like working moms know that all of a sudden we can get a whole day's worth of work done in just a few hours. And that kind of may have seemed impossible before motherhood, but we just get this incredible focus. So I have been there. I mean, when I was a first, when I was a new working mom, I could not afford full time childcare. So I had four hours in the morning, I had lunch with my son, and then I worked as hard as I could during his two hour nap, right. So I kind of got to seven hours of work, working that way, just working around nap time. 00:28:36 Liz: I also have joined gyms where there's two hours of childcare and a little cafe that you can sit in. And so for like 200 bucks a month, you get two hours of childcare a day, whether or not you work out, which is a pretty great deal. You know, YMCAs have free childcare and are really affordable in a lot of communities. So I would think, you know, I would not bat an eye at doing that. I've also heard of entrepreneur moms setting up childcare swaps with other entrepreneurs. So one mom takes the kids one day, another mom, the next. 00:29:13 Liz: I also just, you know, encourage people to think about what they really need help with. Cause sometimes I think, do I really need more childcare and to spend a thousand dollars next week on full-time childcare or do I need to assign this project? To my VA or hire someone on Upwork to get this job done, right? I also think looking at the weekends, which I can often get taken over by kid activities, but my husband and I are working hard now to make sure that we each have designated time on the weekends to ourselves so that we can recover a little bit from the week and be able to be more intentional with, with our kids. So I guess not that I have an easy answer, but trying to think really creatively about your team, your time, where to find really dedicated pockets of time. 00:30:06 Liz: Lastly, I work from home. I've worked full-time from home for 12 years since becoming a mom. But this afternoon, I'm going to a cafe because talk about the space-time continuum. I can somehow be so much more creative and productive and I can put my headphones on and get a latte and sit down and crank workout in a cafe environment. Like that energy is really good for me creatively. And so again, it's like, it is about energy, it is about time, it is about money and all those things kind of intersect and just encouraging people to use their creativity. 00:30:41 Liz: Also, ChatGPT is blowing my mind every single day. And so when I have like thorny questions of how do I solve this weird problem that I've never even talked to someone about? ChatGPT is surprising me with what it's able to suggest. So even AI tools and things like that are able to kind of introduce serendipity into our lives when we realize that, you know, no great company is built alone. And in a lot of ways for me, I learned better how to run my family and think about what it means to lead a family by running a company and seeing no one can, I can't scale a startup by myself. I need talent to be in their zone of genius and we need to work together on a shared mission. And that over time is how I've tried to operate our family more and more intentionally, learning from running my company. 00:31:32 Melissa: I love that. That's the opposite direction or the other direction that Zibby Owens suggested. So Zibby Owens was on Mom Founders Imagination Hub. And she was saying how being a stay at home mom has helped her build out her business and the Zibby verse. Right. So that's like one direction. And then now you are sharing how it helps in the opposite direction too. Right. So founding the business, building the business, being a mom. And I feel like I'm kind of in between because I literally launched my business with my firstborn on my chest. Like I went to that first sales meeting with my baby in my Ergo baby. And he had a diaper blowout and I closed the sale. But Manhattan is all the better for that experience. 00:32:25 Melissa: [unclear] I love this. I love this. And you know what? You have a fertile imagination to say the least. And I think that is, it's huge. It's one worthy that anyone listening should totally check you out. Totally check out Founding Women, go to the website. And just use that expansive thinking to figure out the best solution for yourself, because your energy needs might be different than Liz's energy needs and my own. And so we need to each do our due diligence to see what works best for us and our family. So thank you so much, Liz. And so I appreciate you so much, Liz, for this conversation. And I would love to just hear more about where listeners can... follow you and learn more about what you're building for us. 00:33:15 Liz: Sure, well, thank you for that. My husband went to Stanford Business School and I did not attend but I did start motherly while he was in business school. And I'm on a list serve with all these women who are moms coming out of Stanford GSB, right? So high powered business women and they're about seven years post MBA right now, seven to ten years post MBA. And all of these high powered women are wrestling with this exact thing. So it's just really interesting to have like a sneak peek into that. 00:33:44 Liz: I am building a new support community for female founders. It is the community that I did not have. I think, you know, there's awesome career communities out there for ambitious women. Chief is, you know, the big famous one among them. But in my experience, founders, entrepreneurs are... much more motivated by this idea of freedom, of building an asset, of controlling your schedule. And the challenges that we face are quite different as female founders trying to build in that way. So people can go to foundingwomen.co. You can also look me up on LinkedIn, where I share more information about our community and also just supportive resources for female founders. So my name is Liz Tenety, T-E-N-E-T-Y. I'm hoping eventually to launch my own personal Instagram. 00:34:34 Liz: But I'm also the co-founder of Motherly. So if you are a mom and kind of in the midst of intense, you know, motherhood seasons, we provide expert support and resources on Instagram and our website, and you can find us at @mother.ly. 00:34:49 Melissa: Here are the three things that you will want to really think through pertaining to how to make your life better, how to feel more energized, more enthusiastic about what's ahead. Point number one, investing in your wellbeing before you turn a profit, understanding that everyone's budget is going to be different, and also understanding that you might feel uncertain in terms of what is coming up in the markets, et cetera. It is still a choice that you can make if you already are using some dollars for other sort of components of your childcare experience, right? 00:35:24 Melissa: So what I loved about Liz was that she didn't necessarily come up with some extra magic money. She instead with her husband made a decision. Either the kids go to childcare or go to a preschool that is higher priced, or we figure out a more affordable solution for their childcare or for their preschool and use the remainder or what's leftover or the extra for whatever it might be, cleaning the house. And so that is very inventive in the sense that it's not so much like asking for more, but doing different with the dollars that you intended to spend anyways. 00:36:03 Melissa: Second point, and again, this is before turning a profit if that is available to you. It is an investment. It's a different way of seeing things. The second point that I think is really worth thinking through for yourself is that burnout is not necessarily about being in monk mode, going to a retreat and being secluded from family and friends. You might get so much energy from hanging out with your loved ones. And why would you avoid that source of energy? You're a mom, there's finite energy. And if that is important to you, it is important for you to include that in terms of your, you know, avoid burnout plan. 00:36:43 Melissa: Here's the third point in terms of building a business. Zibby Owens actually in another podcast, which I will link in the show notes. She said that she learned how to build her business and be a team leader from being a stay at home mom. Here, Liz provides the opposite. She shares how building her business, so co-founding Motherly and now founding Women, is helping her really navigate motherhood and build a lifestyle and family life experience that is quote unquote sustainable and I don't know, maybe scalable if that's the right word in that instance. Either way, I would encourage you to really reimagine how you approach your life experience and how you intend to build up or scale your business given this conversation with Liz. 00:37:34 Melissa: I think there was a lot here that can be shared with other moms. I think anyone that is starting or thinking about launching a business needs to hear this conversation. So go ahead and share this episode with them today. You could share it either on iTunes or right here. Be sure that if you do share it on YouTube, which I would love, be sure that you share it with them and you just give them a heads up that they're about to change their perspective on whether or not it's possible to avoid burnout with few or limited resources. I think this conversation offered enough food for thought. 00:38:12 Melissa: So thank you so much. And until next Tuesday, did you subscribe? Did you actually hit the notification bell on YouTube? And if you're listening on iTunes or anywhere else this podcast is heard, did you hit follow? You just have the tiny little things that make a really big difference and encourage me to continue to pump content out like this for other moms. Moms who we have to use our imagination in order to carve a path that we may have never seen laid out for us before. Thank you so much.
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242: How to Manage a Full Plate and Still Grow Your Business and Enter to Win a Guest Spot on This Podcast!
Ever feel like you're running at full capacity and still not getting everything done? We've all been there! This back-to-school season will also come with new things to consider adding to your already full plate. If you've had a business for more than three years, you know it's coming… opportunities to fill up your calendar with new trainings, activities for the kids, and business trips to plan and close out your year. Given this common fall flurry of evaluations and additions to your already full plate, I wanted to share with you my personal filter system. There are three things that I have been asking myself over the last 13 years that have helped me decide for myself based on my priorities: what to participate in, purchase, or remove from my plate. There are so many examples. However, before I share my three filters for evaluating what to add to my plate or remove, I want to give you one heck of an opportunity today that ends on Monday, August 12, 2024, at 5 p.m. CST. You have a chance to enter to win a guest spot on this podcast! Sign up for my newsletter, and you will be entered! Imagine being a guest on the Mom Founder Imagination Hub, sharing your story, and inspiring thousands of fellow mompreneurs. This week, I'm offering you a chance to win a spot on my podcast! All you have to do is visit www.fertileideas.com and sign up for my newsletter between today and the next six days. By signing up, you'll not only stay updated with the latest tips and strategies to grow your business, but you'll also be entered into a drawing for a guest spot on my show. There are a host of sections where you can sign-up on my website from the networking playbook, to grabbing a chapter of my book fertile imagination, or taking 5 minutes if you are stuck to take the quiz. Don't miss out on this amazing opportunity to elevate your brand and reach a wider audience. I'll announce the lucky winner in next week's episode. So head over to www.fertileideas.com right now and sign up. Rules apply: listen to the episode for those rules to win. Let's jump into this episode. Today, I share a personal story from my book Fertile Imagination about the time I invested in Tony Robbins' Business Mastery live event. It was a big investment—$10K for five days, plus travel to Florida and time away from my three kids. But the chance to feel reinvigorated was worth it, so I jumped on the early bird discount. I'm diving into the idea of having a "full plate" and how, as mom founders, we can navigate the flood of opportunities that come our way. I'll share three key filters – alignment, better way, and transferability which I use to decide whether to take on new opportunities, even when things feel overwhelming. So, before you say, 'I have too much on my plate,' consider these filters. It might not be about adding more, but about replacing what doesn't align with your current goals with something that does. Tune in to hear how these filters can help you make informed decisions, prioritize what's important, and grow both personally and professionally. Whether you're navigating a busy schedule or looking to seize new opportunities, these insights are here to help you thrive! In this episode, you will hear: How you can enter a drawing to be a podcast guest on the Mom Founder Imagination Hub i.e. sign-up for any of the free resources on www.fertileideas.com by August 12th, 2024 by 5pm CST to be eligible to win this drawing. Winners will be emailed. Listen to details today. You can be my next podcast guest! Mom founders you want visibility. Enter the contest by simply signing up for anything on www.fertileideas.com Using specific filters to evaluate new personal and professional growth opportunities, such as urgency, alignment, and growth potential. How to periodically reassess what's on your plate to ensure it reflects your current priorities and goals. Ideas on creatively rearranging commitments to manage time zones and deadlines effectively which requires expansive thinking i.e. your imagination. Ways to see whether new business growth strategies can enhance your current methods and whether they are justified to go on your plate. The key to determining if learning a new skill is worthwhile especially if you have lots of other options available to you i.e. are there key skills that are higher value like networking? An easy decision-making framework Melissa has used over the last 13-years to determine whether to invest in a particular course, community, or event when her plate has been busy i.e. three kids, global relocations, and life. Imagine being a guest on the Mom Founder Imagination Hub, sharing your story, and inspiring thousands of fellow mompreneurs. This week, I'm offering you a chance to win a spot on my podcast! All you have to do is visit www.fertileideas.com and sign up for my newsletter between today and the next six days. By signing up, you'll not only stay updated with the latest tips and strategies to grow your business, but you'll also be entered into a drawing for a guest spot on my show. There are a host of sections where you can sign-up on my website from the networking playbook, to grabbing a chapter of my book fertile imagination, or taking 5 minutes if you are stuck to take the quiz. Don't miss out on this amazing opportunity to elevate your brand and reach a wider audience. I'll announce the lucky winner in next week's episode. So head over to www.fertileideas.com right now and sign up. About Melissa Llarena I'm a bestselling author (learn more on www.fertileideas.com), imagination coach behind the Fertile Imagination to Networking Success Group Coaching Program, consultant, speaker, contributor to ForbesWomen articles that have garnered 4 million-plus views, and the podcast host of the Mom Founder Imagination Hub. Featured guests include GaryVee, Beth Comstock, Suzy Batiz, David Meltzer, and hundreds of other unconventional thinkers. Melissa has been featured in the WSJ, Business Insider, Fox Business, CNN Money, The Huffington Post, and other publications. She holds a psychology degree from NYU, an MBA from the Tuck School of Business at Dartmouth, and a Transformational Coaching Academy certificate and is training to become a meditation practitioner. Melissa lives in Austin, Texas, with her husband and three sons (one singleton and a set of identical twins). Quotes, that can change your perspective: "Networking is so transferable and it is not going away and it is how deals are done." -Melissa Llarena "Your capability is constant. But how much of it you use depends upon who you think you really are." - Tony Robbins "I know that you're going to have a lot on your plate. This is not going to change. There are ways however to reimagine what gets to be on your plate and what doesn't." - Melissa Llarena "I don't want you to miss out on an opportunity that makes sense just because you have a lot on your plate. THIS is where you can use your superpower --- your fertile imagination." - Melissa Llarena SHARE this episode and head over to fertileideas.com and sign up for our newsletter within the next six days. You'll gain access to valuable insights, a chance to participate in our raffle, and the opportunity to be featured on the podcast. Don't miss out—act now to unlock your next big opportunity! Supporting Resources: Schedule a free call to see if Fertile Imagination to Networking Success my signature program is the right fit: https://www.melissallarena.com/sessions/ Podcast: Mom Founder Imagination Hub: https://www.melissallarena.com/podcast/ Instagram: https://www.instagram.com/MelissaLlarena/ Or, grab for free your copy of the "From Contact to Connection: The Mompreneur's Go-First Networking & Follow Up Playbook": https://witty-thinker-2643.ck.page/21e52edb87 Subscribe and Review Have you subscribed to my podcast for new moms who are entrepreneurs, founders, and creators? I'd love for you to subscribe if you haven't yet. I'd love it even more if you could drop a review or 5-star rating over on Apple Podcasts. Simply select "Ratings and Reviews" and "Write a Review" then a quick line with your favorite part of the episode. It only takes a second and it helps spread the word about the podcast for writer moms.
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241: Imperfectly Perfect: Dr. Kathy Zhang's Key Strategies for Leveraging Authenticity and Achieving Impact
Are you feeling trapped in the cycle of perfectionism, preventing you from sharing your work with the world? If so, you're not alone in your struggle. Discover how to embrace imperfection and unlock your true potential as we explore an eye-opening conversation with Dr. Kathy Zhang at Podcast Movement. With her background in end-of-life care, Dr. Zhang provides a unique perspective on embracing authenticity and imperfection. As a certified life coach, hypnotist, and host of The Purpose Filter podcast, she offers valuable insights on overcoming perfectionism to lead a more fulfilled and meaningful life. Drawing from her hospice care experience, Dr. Zhang highlighted that end-of-life regrets often stem from not being genuine, not from failing to achieve perfection. Our discussion emphasized overcoming perfectionism and embracing authenticity for greater personal and professional growth. Tune in to learn how letting go of perfection can help you execute your business ideas and focus on what truly matters. If you have an important project saved on your laptop that you've been meaning to start or complete but haven't gotten around to, I want to hear from you! DM me on Instagram at MelissaLlarena with details about your project, and let's work together to bring it to life. Your ideas deserve to be shared, and I'm here to help you make it happen! In this episode, you will hear: Impact of near-death experiences on perspectives and actions Finding inspiration and motivation from external sources Pattern interruption and transformative change Avoiding pain and seeking pleasure on behaviors Making peace with doing things imperfectly Impact of perfectionism on taking action Authenticity in relationships, mental and emotional health, and physical well-being This episode is brought to you by Fertile Imagination: A Guide For Stretching Every Mom's Superpower For Maximum Impact – My book is now available on Amazon in its paperback version and Kindle format. Grab a free chapter on www.fertileideas.com. DM me on Instagram @melissallarena just type the word FERTILE and I'll share the link if that's easier to get to fertileideas.com for all the details you need to celebrate your own Fertile Imagination! Here's that link: https://www.instagram.com/melissallarena/
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240: The Mom Founder's Handbook: Overcoming Challenges and Avoiding Common Outreach Mistakes for Successful Business Growth
Hey there, welcome back to another episode of the Mom Founder Imagination Hub podcast! Today, we're diving into three super common mistakes that mom founders often make when they're reaching out to prospective investors, partners, alliances or even internal sponsors of their business ideas. Trust me, these are totally avoidable! So, let me tell you about this one mom founder I know. She had this amazing idea for a TV show, but when she pitched it, she made a few missteps that could have been easily avoided. First off, she didn't really understand who the decision maker was. Big no-no! It's so important to know who you're talking to and what makes them tick. Next, she didn't take the time to figure out what actually mattered to the person she was pitching to. You gotta know what their priorities are! And finally, she didn't contextualize her pitch. You can't just throw your idea out there without showing how it fits into the bigger picture i.e. how does your solution fit into your target audience's portfolio or performance goals. Being a mom founder comes with unique challenges, especially when balancing entrepreneurship and family life. I understand completely. That's why I'm here to provide practical advice and support to ensure your next pitch gets you to the bargaining table (vs. is ignored).! In this episode, you will hear: Understanding the decision maker and contextualizing the pitch Unique challenges faced by mom founders in balancing entrepreneurship and family life Challenges of navigating family life while pursuing entrepreneurship Failure to consider the perspective of the person being pitched to Lack of understanding of what matters to the person being pitched to Contextualizing the pitch to fit the specific industry or sector Need for thorough research and due diligence before reaching out to potential partners or investors Thoughtful and strategic communication in building successful business relationships In the car driving? Pause this episode and write this down. Book a free consult with Melissa this week. Go to www.melissallarena.com/sessions. Let's role-play one conversation you intend to have this week. You are a founder with a baked idea and you are currently in the pitching process whether it's for investment dollars or after you've gotten investment dollars and now you are on the hook for speeding up your business development efforts! You can tell me who I should be in this role-play, and I'll tell you what red flags I hear and whether a VIP day is right for you. Here's what you can expect during your VIP day and I want to be transparent. Spots for my VIP Days are extremely limited. I'm offering just 3 spots this month, and after that, this opportunity may never come around again. This is your chance to fast-track your connections and propel your business forward in just 3 hours. Here's what you can expect: Tailored Strategy Session: Before the VIP Networking Day, you'll receive a simple questionnaire. This prework is designed to optimize our time together, ensuring every minute counts. We'll dive deep into your business goals, target investors, potential podcast guests/partners, or media contacts, and current networking challenges, setting the stage for maximum productivity. Real-Time Guidance: Once we're live on Zoom, it's all about action. Together, we'll roll up our sleeves and dive into the heart of networking. I won't just talk strategy; we'll implement it in real-time. Using the insights gathered from your prework, we'll identify and reach out to potential investors, podcast guests/partners, or media giants on the spot. You'll witness firsthand how to craft compelling outreach messages and make meaningful connections that matter. Strategic Outreach: Cold outreach can be daunting, but not anymore. With my guidance, you'll confidently reach out to potential investors, podcast guests, or media contacts during our session. Whether it's through email, LinkedIn, or other channels, you'll have a clear plan of action and the confidence to execute it in real-time. Follow-Up Mastery: The conversation doesn't end with the initial outreach. I'll equip you with a follow-up strategy designed to nurture relationships and keep investors, podcast guests/partners, or media contacts engaged. From timely follow-up emails to strategic touchpoints, you'll have all the tools you need to move prospects closer to funding, secure podcast appearances, or establish relationships with influential media personalities. By the end of our VIP Networking Day, you'll feel empowered, energized, and ready to conquer the world of networking. Say goodbye to wasted time and missed opportunities. With our tailored approach, you'll unlock the door to funding success, captivating podcast episodes, or media exposure and propel your business forward. Because this is SO important and so easy to fix….the elevator pitch itself…for starters…..I want you to sign up for the 30-minute complimentary session before you step out there and start pitching yourself to anyone…..let me give you quick tips that can be the difference between getting to pitch your idea or being totally shut out and ignored…..so go to www.melissallarena.com/sessions today....the VIP day are limited and may not be right for you right now but the free sessions are available today…no reason not to share your pitch with me. About Melissa Llarena I'm a bestselling author (learn more on www.fertileideas.com), imagination coach behind the Fertile Imagination to Networking Success Group Coaching Program, consultant, speaker, contributor to ForbesWomen articles that have garnered 4 million-plus views, and the podcast host of the Mom Founder Imagination Hub. Featured guests include GaryVee, Beth Comstock, Suzy Batiz, David Meltzer, and hundreds of other unconventional thinkers. Melissa has been featured in the WSJ, Business Insider, Fox Business, CNN Money, The Huffington Post, and other publications. She holds a psychology degree from NYU, an MBA from the Tuck School of Business at Dartmouth, and a Transformational Coaching Academy certificate and is training to become a meditation practitioner. Melissa lives in Austin, Texas, with her husband and three sons (one singleton and a set of identical twins). Quotes, that can change your perspective: "First impressions happen one time, and yes, you can totally turn it around, but you're a mom founder. The time you spent making that first impression, the guts it took to put yourself out there, is something that you're now going to have to work up to yet again." "When it comes to being a mom founder or being a mom with a business, it is urgent that you really, really stay sharp in terms of coming up with unexpected or new or shortcut ways to reach out to everyone and anyone." "If you want to do business on your own terms as you have opted to as a mom founder, you don't want to not be yourself when you're doing business. That was part of the purpose of owning your own thing along with solving a challenge, being mission-driven, and heart-centered." "I know the effort it takes to think through a product, I know the effort it takes to see a product market fit, and I know the effort it's going to take to implement whatever it is that you promise to the people on your list." SHARE this episode and elevate your business! Master effective networking and pitching by avoiding common mistakes and adopting personalized communication strategies. Make a lasting impression and build meaningful connections and start transforming your pitch today! Supporting Resources: Schedule a free call to see if Fertile Imagination to Networking Success my signature program is the right fit: https://www.melissallarena.com/sessions/ Podcast: Mom Founder Imagination Hub: https://www.melissallarena.com/podcast/ Instagram: https://www.instagram.com/MelissaLlarena/ Or, grab for free your copy of the "From Contact to Connection: The Mompreneur's Go-First Networking & Follow Up Playbook": https://witty-thinker-2643.ck.page/21e52edb87 Subscribe and Review Have you subscribed to my podcast for new moms who are entrepreneurs, founders, and creators? I'd love for you to subscribe if you haven't yet. I'd love it even more if you could drop a review or 5-star rating over on Apple Podcasts. Simply select "Ratings and Reviews" and "Write a Review" then a quick line with your favorite part of the episode. It only takes a second and it helps spread the word about the podcast for writer moms. TRANSCRIPT 00:00:00 Melissa: First impressions happen one time. And yes, you can totally turn around, but you're a Mom Founder. And what distinguishes you versus someone that might not have kids is the fact that that time you spent in making that first impression, the guts it took to put yourself out there, that is something that you're now gonna have to work up to yet again. And it is way harder to constantly fall down and get back up, fall down and get back up when you're navigating family life in parallel. 00:00:39 Melissa: Welcome to the Mom Founder Imagination Hub, your weekly podcast to inspire you to dream bigger. Plan out how you're going to get to that next level in business, find the energy to keep going, and make sure your creative juices are flowing so that this way you get what you really want rather than having to settle. Get ready to discover how mom founders have reimagined entrepreneurship and motherhood. 00:01:01 Melissa: Ever wonder how they do it? Tune in to find out and stretch yourself by also learning from diverse entrepreneurs who might not be moms, but who have lessons you can tailor about how you can disrupt industries and step way outside of your comfort zone. I believe every mom's superpower is her imagination. In this podcast, I'm going to give you the mindset, methods and tools to unleash yours. Sounds good? Then keep listening. 00:01:32 Melissa: Hey there, it's Melissa Llarena, your host of the Mom Founder Imagination Hub. So we're gonna tackle today three avoidable mistakes that often mom founders make right when they begin to outreach their network or talk to complete strangers so that their business can grow. So three avoidable mistakes. Let me share a story first. 00:01:57 Melissa: I had a wonderful conversation the other day with a mom who was so psyched about this TV show that she wants to put out into the world. And she has an outreach list of organizations and different individuals in those organizations that she wants to pitch her idea to. So she's thinking companies like Lego, companies like Hasbro, you get the drip. And here's the thing. She was so excited about her elevator pitch. I mean, she was just so ready to roll with it, and I wanted to hear it. 00:02:32 Melissa: So of course, she went ahead, she memorized it, and I can tell that she spent probably hours upon hours really refining it with her peers. And she said it, and then I kind of felt these like internal crickets. And that brings me to today's episode. I don't want you to make the same mistakes that this super excited, well-intentioned Mom Founder made. 00:03:00 Melissa: The mistake was the following. Once I heard her pitch, I was like, okay, first of all, who was I supposed to be? Like there's some key questions that as you are putting yourself out there, pitching your business idea to potential investors or partners, that you've got to ask yourself. And if you don't actually think about what you're going to say and whether or not is going to resonate with the other person, then you've completely failed. So that was point number one. 00:03:32 Melissa: Who was I supposed to be? I had no idea. I was just listening to the pitch and I was like, wow. My hair felt like wind was blowing, but it was kind of like hot air because I wasn't sure what I was supposed to prioritize in terms of the information that she shared. The other question was, okay, so now that I'm this person in her case, marketing director, let's imagine, then what do you perceive to be so important to me? And in terms of the pitch that this person shared, I didn't really catch that. I wasn't able to discern what she perceived to be important to me. 00:04:08 Melissa: Some other questions. Why would I, someone working for an organization, want to bring on or support a TV show that's not addictive? Now, this was super specific to the sort of content that she had worked really hard on. However, you have to understand, there might be one or two words in your pitch to an investor or a partner that simply don't make sense given that person's key performance indicators. I would want a TV show that's addictive so that this way kids watch it over and over again. 00:04:46 Melissa: But again, if you hadn't done your homework prior to pitching, you might miss that point. And here's something else that came up when her and I were on a 30-minute complimentary session where I was listening to her pitch, this idea. So what problem are you trying to solve in my company? And I think that is something that we often do not think or consider prior to working on our super fancy put together pitches. It is so contextual. And that's why we are here today. 00:05:20 Melissa: So the three avoidable mistakes that you will want to be mindful of if you are pitching a business idea to an organization or to someone that you admire, begin in this very, very clear manner. Know the decision maker. That's one of the three mistakes. So I originally began sharing a bit about the questions I was asking myself after she shared her pitch and I shared with her and I helped guide her. 00:05:51 Melissa: But at the same time, that is the most important thing. You might think to yourself that, okay, my product is amazing, my service is compelling, but at the end of the day, you're talking to a human being that has a filter that is quite precise. Now, if you've pitched an organization, and you have considered an investor profile as like your go-to, who am I pitching sort of document. That's amazing. It's a start, but every single human being with whom you interact is going to have a completely different set of priorities. And you want to be mindful of that. 00:06:32 Melissa: So you want to really know what are the job titles that you're going to encounter pertaining to this pitch? What's common. For example, is this someone that's going to be in a job for two years, 10 years, or six months? You can tell really depending on the functional area of expertise, there's some functions like marketing where the timeframe is really low. What might that mean? That might mean that whatever outcome or whatever sort of impact you intend to make has to be in the very near short term. All of this is to be considered in your pitch. And all of this is to be considered as you go through an outreach networking list. 00:07:15 Melissa: Now, I might be calling it networking. You might call it biz dev. You might call it sales, looking for strategic partnerships. I really see it as one in the same. Why is that? Because you want to find someone with whom you're almost going the same way. It's almost like a hitchhiker. Not to say you do that and that is not safe, but let's just imagine that you're there and you're on a highway. Think locally, wherever you might be, and you're heading in one direction. You're heading north. You want to be sure that you figure out who else is heading north. You would not want to get into a car and start chatting with the driver and saying, oh, hey, why are we going south? I want to go north. That is a lot of effort. 00:08:05 Melissa: So what does that mean? That means that you have to know the person that you are reaching out to on that long list that you probably spent hours trying to put together as a Mom Founder, which i.e. is time away from the kids. And you want to be sure that you're both going in the same direction and you are speaking their language. That brings me to the third big mistake I have noticed when it comes to going through a list of contacts that you would like to pitch your business idea, whether it is for funding or it might be for media placement. 00:08:40 Melissa: It's really interchangeable in terms of the people that you are going to reach out to. But at the end of the day, every single person has something that matters to them that might not be so obvious to you, especially. And this is what I've noticed so much because these are the mom founders that I have partnered with through these years. It's folks that are entering a brand new market, folks that for them, maybe you know, their background was working in one sector, and this is a new sector. 00:09:11 Melissa: So what does that mean? That means that you have to understand what matters to that person and what matters in that market. And what does that mean? That means that if you're talking to someone in procurement, they have a different set of words that they use to quantify success versus if you're talking to someone in finance, versus if you're talking to someone that is at a different level. 00:09:37 Melissa: So I think it's really important that not just knowing who the decision maker is and actually looking up whether it's LinkedIn, and that's just surface level. There's a lot more research that needs to go into this if you're going through a list where you're asking for thousands of dollars or millions of dollars in investment, but asking at least, let me look at their career background to have a good sense of how they might approach this particular project. Right? 00:10:07 Melissa: Okay, so knowing the decision maker, the second mistake is not understanding what matters to that person. And it could really rely on their functional area of expertise. Again, you're the mom founder, you're an expert in your product or service. However, here's the thing, the person that you're talking to, they have a lot of priorities and they have a lot of different ways of calling success and you need to speak the same language. Otherwise it is like straight up a tower of babble situation. 00:10:37 Melissa: And you do not want that because we all know what happened. Things crumbled and things did not go so well. Okay, so again, what does this person really care about? Right, so knowing what really matters, what do they care about? What is it that they actually call what they care about? So that is mistake number two. 00:10:58 Melissa: So these are the three mistakes that I want you to avoid. And I'll get to number three. When you have a list of contacts that you're going through because you just came up with an invention or you have a business solution or offering that you are ready for funding or to get funding, right? Okay, so mistake number three, contextualizing your pitch. So back to the first story. 00:11:22 Melissa: So there I was listening to this beautiful pitch. I mean, we're talking about perfection. The words were exciting. Everything that she said was compelling to the right person in the right context. However, this person didn't have the expertise of a particular industry. So as you go through your list of contacts and you're there pitching your idea to different organizations or people, there's different things that are going on in different sectors. 00:11:55 Melissa: For example, let's just imagine that you are pitching to one sector and in that sector, you have no idea that this concept that your TV show would not be addictive is absolutely not going to work and not at all the key to success when right now you have a lot of people who's attention is disparate, right? Is in a lot of different places. So here you are saying that, yeah, they're gonna get like one hit of my TV show and that'll be enough and it won't be addictive. Meanwhile, let's imagine as an industry, you need to get people to keep coming back because that is how you organize your ad campaigns with your advertisers, then it's not gonna lay quite right. 00:12:46 Melissa: Okay, so let me get to the point as clearly as possible. Here's the third mistake, so contextualizing your pitch. I wanna share something with you that I learned back in advertising. So I used to work in ad agencies. This was now at least 13 years ago. And I remember working on the IBM account, working on the SAP account, and I remember being told back then, you need to know more about what's happening and what's important to IBM and the tech space than your clients. Same thing with SAP. 00:13:18 Melissa: What does that mean to you, a Mom Founder who has this glorious list that you want to go through but you don't want to burn because you just spent so much time figuring out who the right people might be to shepherd your idea in a big organization. So what does that mean? That means that you need to understand if you need to understand what the drivers are in that sector. You need to understand if there's like new competitors that are just really eroding or just really eating into a market share. You need to also understand how to contextualize what it is that you're offering in the context of their existing portfolio of offerings. 00:14:03 Melissa: Okay, so I said a lot there. There's a lot that needs to happen before you start calling people. I totally get that you might have an investor profile. I get that you have partners that believe so much in your product that they've desired and they've worked for free till this point. But you're going to waste your time, waste your effort and your energy. And I know as a Mom Founder, particularly, you don't got a lot of energy if you do not do this due diligence to a point where at nauseam, you know more about someone's business than they might. 00:14:41 Melissa: However, back to my advertising days, you don't want to show up as arrogant because we always would say, you know more about your business than we do. But that wasn't always the case if I'm being really honest about it. And in your situation, if you're looking to really make a great impression on an organization because you want to partner with them, again, you both have to be going in the same direction. You need to totally understand who you're talking to in terms of how long they're going to be there, how you might want to angle the value that you bring to the table and where you fit in terms of the context of their portfolio. 00:15:20 Melissa: But at the same time you just want to be sure that you have done your homework to a point where again you feel confident and competent that working with you is gonna leave them better off than not working with you in whatever capacity that might be and It takes a lot of practice and I wanted to just kind of go to the very top, your elevator pitch might not be enough. It might not be what is necessary. Every single person that you're talking to, it might completely throw someone off because they'll think that you're talking into some sort of recording, especially if you've recorded it. 00:15:57 Melissa: So you want to be sure that you also bring some stories because oftentimes those resonate a lot more than just statistics and having the right leadership team in place, which I tend to hear a lot. Okay, so here's the story. So risks of not doing your homework. This is personal in the sense that as a podcaster, I'm sure you can imagine how many times I am pitched in terms of podcast guests. And the other day I was looking in my inbox and I noticed someone was pitching me. They were a PR professional so they should have known better. However in terms of time budget, etc., they provided a very generic pitch. 00:16:43 Melissa: So imagine in your situation, right? Again, back to you being a Mom Founder, having a list, having finite time and energy, having spent so much effort upfront, trying to figure out who you're gonna reach out to, but not having done enough effort in terms of researching the three things that I shared with you in terms of the actual people that you're talking to, what actually matters to them, and then also how you fit in the context of like a company's portfolio as an example, and why partnering with you is better than not. 00:17:19 Melissa: Let's imagine this, with this person, this PR person, she was pitching me, again, this is the Mom Founder Imagination Hub podcast. She was pitching me a guy, which 100% I have had men on this podcast, like James Altucher, Gary Vee, et cetera. But she was pitching me a guy that was really all about financial market solutions, having nothing to do with entrepreneurship. And I was just like, what the heck is this? Like, is this even for me? Like you don't want to be that person that emails someone a pitch or jumps on the phone, I know old school, but hey, it still works, and you completely are talking, but the person on the other side is like, why are you calling me? 00:18:08 Melissa: So that is what was happening to me. And that story basically wants to just like reaffirm in you the fact that don't waste your time by not knowing who you're reaching out to at the individual level. And I know it takes a lot of work, a lot of effort. But here's the thing, if you don't do it, this is what happens. All that money, right? And if you think about your time as money, is wasted in terms of the effort that you put to just creating that outreach list. That's one. 00:18:41 Melissa: Here's the other thing, you're gonna burn a bridge because it's going to show that you're not as thoughtful as you truly are. And if you're a Mom Founder, one thing I know about the ones I've worked with, like you are so thoughtful. I mean, when it comes to like the logistics of your family and how you went about, you know, doing market research for your product or figuring out market product fit, I know you're thoughtful. So you wanna be sure that that reputation precedes you, right? So again, you've gotta do that extra research. You wanna be sure that you are resonating with the person. So you don't want to burn through that contact list if you don't have to. 00:19:21 Melissa: Here's the other idea. Let's imagine that you make that mistake, kind of like that PR agency, right? That was sending me a very random podcast guest proposal. You're gonna have to then, if you're really interested in partnering with a Lego or with a Hasbro, et cetera, you're gonna have to then go back and do some triage. And it's not always possible to like resurrect from some blow paw like that. 00:19:44 Melissa: So I wanna just say, here's the other thing. First impressions happen one time. And yes, you can totally turn around, but you're a Mom Founder. And what distinguishes you versus someone that might not have kids is the fact that that time you spent in making that first impression, the guts it took to put yourself out there, that is something that you're now gonna have to like work up to yet again. And it is way harder to constantly fall down and get back up, fall down and get back up when you're navigating family life in parallel. Just this morning to give you an example. 00:20:27 Melissa: So I have all these podcast episode recordings today. And my son then says to me at 5:00 AM, mind you, mom, I think I have a fever. And I looked at him and I was like, please do not have a fever. That's just like one of the ups and downs. We'll call that a down that is so natural to you that other people might not experience, but your business has to keep going on. So, you know, we have finite energy and finite abilities to get back down and get back up, figure out new ways, different patterns, right? Use our imagination and try other or alternative paths forward. 00:21:08 Melissa: If you've got to do the same thing for being a mom as you do an entrepreneurship, you've got to be sure that you are somehow preventing all of that struggle where you can. You need to be a sane mom. That's what I'm saying. So again, this is avoidable. That's why I have it in this episode. And I really hope that you take it to heart because there's so much that's at stake. If you don't actually consider those three mistakes that I share. 00:21:40 Melissa: So I don't wanna leave you hanging. I think this is so important. I wanna be of service to you because I think that it takes so much guts to just like leave your job, for example, or start a business, especially as a mom. It also is absolutely beautiful that you want to do something that's mission driven. Those are the moms that I work with and I help in terms of really navigating networking and building relationships so that you're in the right rooms, having the right conversations, getting the money that your business idea deserves, that I wanna do this for you. So hear me out. 00:22:17 Melissa: Okay, now let's just imagine that you are in a car right now, so you're driving. So what I will have you do is absolutely bookmark this conversation, but write this down when you have an opportunity in the event that you're on the move. So I offer something called a VIP day. It's a three-hour Zoom session during which time we are going to work through your contact list. But here's the thing. It's even better than that. 00:22:45 Melissa: Not only are we going to work through your contact list, but prior to jumping on Zoom, I'm going to give you some homework that's going to help you thoughtfully not just put together that contact list, but approach your research so that this way you can avoid these three mistakes. I'm also going to make sure that as you approach the different people during our time, that three-hour Zoom time frame, that you're leading with what is going to resonate the most based on a number of criteria that for me and in use with my clients have worked in the past. 00:23:24 Melissa: I mean, it's so predictable in terms of some of the priorities that people actually have, but it's not always obvious on LinkedIn because sometimes people are not that upfront in terms of their agendas. And I'm not using that in a negative way, but I'm sure you get what I'm saying. So there's other sources of research that I will share with you also on that three hours Zoom session. It's a VIP day. Also, it's really about making sure that we have woken up your imagination. That is the name of this podcast. And I stand on that. 00:23:58 Melissa: When it comes to being a Mom Founder or being a mom with a business, it is urgent that you really, really stay sharp in terms of coming up with unexpected or new or shortcut ways to reach out to everyone and anyone. And again, relationships is absolutely critical when it comes to building your business and making sure that your message gets out to as many human beings as possible. So you wanna be sure that you're doing it from a place of expansive thinking. You're doing it from a place of, okay, this person is gonna expect me to reach out to them on, as an example, Instagram, but I'm gonna come in through this side door, right? Which has worked for me and my clients as well. 00:24:44 Melissa: So let me share an example. I had a client that actually wanted to reach out to insurance companies. And it was really interesting because this was completely new to her. She owns a nonprofit. And so she reached out to an insurance company and she was baffled that the person on the other side of the email got back to her almost like in an hour, okay? He got back to her in an hour. Why was that? It was because she realized that this person would be, A, in a position of power. 00:25:13 Melissa: So people do want to be helpful. So you want to make sure you're asking the right people who can help you. But then at the same time, her email was personal. It resonated, and it was thoughtful. It was in alignment with what's important to an insurance organization. And she had to do some research in order to uncover precisely what that was in this market. Sorry to say, but sometimes different times of the year, different things are important and different trends will influence whether or not what was important, you know, last trend is in season this trend. 00:25:45 Melissa: So again, there's a lot that needs to happen, but we can cover that during the three hours together over Zoom. Here's what else happens during that three hour session, the VIP session with me for Mom Founders. So you and I are gonna roll up our sleeves. Like literally, if I have long sleeves, or metaphorically, if I do not, we're going to actually start emailing and reaching out to people live because I need to see, like, what do your subject lines actually say? Are they generic or compelling? How is it that you're positioning what you intend behind the conversation with that contact, right? 00:26:20 Melissa: So it's about authenticity, but it's also about being direct and infusing your personality. Because if you wanna do business on your own terms, as you have opted to as a mom founder, you don't want to not be yourself when you're doing business. Like that was part of the purpose of owning your own thing, along with solving a challenge, along with being mission driven and heart centered and wanting to see impact in the slice of the world that matters to you. 00:26:51 Melissa: So here we go. Call for you to reach out to me so I can help you so that you do not make those mistakes. You do not burn through a list of contacts if you have a business idea or already a business in market that you want to get funding for, or you want to leverage some sort of strategic partnership, be sure that you take advantage of this. And it is the following. So I do have those VIP days, but this offer right now is for free. 00:27:20 Melissa: Go to melissallarena.com/sessions. You will have an opportunity to apply for a 30-minute complimentary session, during which time I'm going to help you by role playing and hearing what you have to offer in terms of your business pitch, in terms of your origin story, in terms of what you intend out of a conversation with a decision maker, right? All pertaining to your business. So go ahead to melissallarena.com/sessions. There is an application and here's the reason why an application is going to be absolutely helpful to you. 00:28:02 Melissa: When you start to put pen to paper or technically type out your answers in the application, you also start to clarify what you need to happen in terms of the people that you wanna talk to, in terms of your very best next steps. And in terms of your own business, putting pen to paper has been the absolute life-giving solution for me when it comes to ironing out my thoughts. And it's better for you to do that on my application than to do it in front of someone that can give you money. 00:28:38 Melissa: So go ahead, melisallarena.com/sessions, and you will see the link here. What I invite you to really consider is, okay, bring forth your story, bring with you your idea in terms of the investor profile. Be sure that you tell me who I'm supposed to be. I want you to know also what is going to be important to me and how whatever it is that you've got is going to help me and fix in my existing portfolio. So have that already in mind, be prepared. It is going to be a great session. And that is for free. That is 30-minute session for free. 00:29:20 Melissa: At that time, at the very end, after you have your answers, I will absolutely invite you to join me during one of the VIP sessions. Those VIP sessions, I only do three spots every single month. I'm sure you can understand as a mom with kids yourself, what I do is really, really important in terms of helping moms specifically as flexibly as possible. So it could be an evening time or a weekend time or chunk of time. And for me, three hours each month is what I can do in terms of VIP days. 00:29:58 Melissa: You get to choose if it's the right fit, I get to choose if you're the right fit and I can help you and we will take it from there. So I'm really excited about these VIP sessions, but more than that, I wanna hear from you and I don't want you to make a mistake in terms of burning through a contact list. I know the effort it takes to think through a product. I know the effort it takes to see a product market fit. And I know the effort it's going to take to implement whatever it is that you promise to the people on your list. 00:30:29 Melissa: So be sure that you take advantage of the 30-minute session with me. It is complimentary. You'll have the link here. It'll also be in the show notes if you are just listening to this conversation. And then we could certainly talk about whether a VIP day is the right next step for you. No strings attached. You are very welcome to attend a 30-minute session with me. I want to be sure that we avoid as many mistakes as possible when it comes to working through an outreach list. I want you to have so much success. 00:31:03 Melissa: And until Tuesday, let me know what you got out of this conversation, you are more than welcome to leave some comments. If you're watching this on YouTube, you're also welcome to share this with a friend, because here's the thing, Mom Founders know other Mom Founders. And if anyone is interested in actually pitching investors or securing strategic partnerships with people in different organizations or different organizations, you want to be sure that they have the greatest odds of success. 00:31:31 Melissa: So go ahead and share this episode. It's also in audio. And if you're interested in that 30-minute consult, it is available to you. And no strings attached, as I mentioned. So thank you for this conversation. And thank you. Until next Tuesday, go ahead and subscribe. Follow me officially, because next Tuesday, we're going to go through an actual interview with an investor. Stay tuned. Signing off, Melissa Llarena.
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239: Summer Sanity: Tami Hackbarth on Fair Play Strategies and Self-Care Tips for a Harmonious Family Life
In this episode, we dive deep into the secrets of a balanced, harmonious family life with our special guest, Tami Hackbarth. Tami introduces us to the Fair Play method, inspired by Eve Rodsky's transformative book "Fair Play," offering practical strategies to manage household duties equitably and ease the mental load, especially during the chaotic summer months. Join us as Tami shares her powerful journey from burnout to well-being through guilt-free self-care practices like regular exercise, meditation, and setting healthy boundaries. Learn how these changes not only improved her personal well-being but also had a profound impact on her professional life and those around her. Explore the dynamics of implementing the Fair Play method within relationships and family structures through Tami's real-life examples, from managing summer activities to everyday chores. In this episode, you will hear: Importance of equitable distribution of household duties. Strategies to manage household logistics for a balanced environment. Setting healthy boundaries and prioritizing self-care. The concept of domestic labor and its unequal distribution. Encouraging partners to take initiative in household management. Dividing tasks and involving children in decision-making. Open communication about household responsibilities. This episode is brought to you by Fertile Imagination: A Guide For Stretching Every Mom's Superpower For Maximum Impact – My book is now available on Amazon in its paperback version and Kindle format. Grab a free chapter on www.fertileideas.com. DM me on Instagram @melissallarena just type the word FERTILE and I'll share the link if that's easier to get to fertileideas.com for all the details you need to celebrate your own Fertile Imagination! Here's that link: https://www.instagram.com/melissallarena/
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238: Turning Networking Woes into Wins This Summer: A Step-by-Step Guide for Mom Founders
How to network with confidence for mom founders..... ever been disappointed in yourself that you missed an opportunity to talk to someone you admire or to put yourself out there and introduce yourself to a major investor or prospective client? If you said yes, then this is the episode for you! Come this fall, are you going to be ready to do this with confidence, or are you at risk of disappointing yourself because you didn't feel ready or didn't do everything you could when you had the opportunity? If you do not want to feel in-ept as a former client told me, she originally felt then this is the episode for you! I had cold feet myself when I first saw Shelly Lazarus and Beth Comstock however... I knew what to do once I was in front of GaryVee. I rehearsed my stories, questions, and asked. There was prework, follow-through, and strategy. No PR team, no big following, no former c-suite position. I knew how to work with my impostor syndrome. What was different? What did I do that produced different results in me? How did I build my own confidence to have the guts to perform when the time came? How do you get your podcast guests? This is the number one question I'm asked by podcasters who know how hard it is to land a guest like GaryVee, much less as your tenth guest! The second question I get often came most recently from a client in the fitness industry who asked: how did you have the confidence to interview GaryVee? My answer to both is my three-step method. In this episode, you will hear: Importance of shifting from transactional to genuine connections. How genuine connections lead to more meaningful and lasting relationships. Understanding your goals and the value you bring to the table. Building relationships based on genuine interest and mutual benefit. Research and rehearsal to build confidence. My Imagination to Impact to Income Method ™ gives me a reliable process to identify who to talk to, where to find them, and what to do once we connect. It helped my client like yourself go from feeling intimidated to talking to people like GaryVee, Beth Comstock, Suzy Batiz, Zibby Owens to saying hi to them and pitching your ideas without hesitation. The method is your step-by-step solution to networking anxiety. When you join now as a member of the five mom founders this summer I will be offering an exclusive one-on-one session role-playing their biggest encounter! I'll look for their elevator pitch, see if their stories would resonate with their contact, and even help them with their delivery! You want to look confident around confident people. This unexpected approach to networking will change your life just like it has for this doting parent in North Carolina "At the core of it, for me, it was about re-building and projecting confidence. I doubted myself. This program was critical to re-build my confidence and realize that I was not doing the right things to stand out. With this confidence, rejection has not been an issue, and now I am looking at opportunities without any hesitation. Melissa knows how to motivate people to make those things happen. I will continue building my brand and networking. This new habit will allow me to continue growing and reaching my potential." -J. Hernandez, Artificial Intelligence at Sales Factory Inside of Fertile Imagination to Networking Success you get access to: • 9 weeks of live networking coaching and community • Value-packed on demand curriculum on everything from navigating impostor syndrome to who to network with, how to find them, what to say, and on planning your fall and winter 2024 networking calendar focused on your business growth goal. • 3 hours/ weekly investment this summer (2 whenever or wherever you wish) to hit the ground running in the fall and feel ahead for a change • Lifetime access to tools and resources built for mom founders including meditations and unexpected ways to let go of mom guilt and overwhelm • Exclusive opportunity for the first five mom founder participants including a multimedia podcast guest feature, two private bonus sessions, and a 30% discounted investment Special extras: Daily Wins Workbook, Impostor Syndrome Journaling, and Networking Email Templates and More! I'm also offering an exclusive bonus for the first five mom founders only which is a guide on how to boost your productivity as a solopreneur and/or delegate or farm out things in your business so you can easily fit this into your summer calendar. Click HERE to schedule a 30-minute call with me to learn more about Fertile Imagination to Networking Success for Mom Founders and jump in on this exclusive summer offer for the first five mom founders. Join this cohort now and get your productivity bonus and your free role-playing private session when you are in. Class starts very soon and will be capped this summer to only 5 mom founders. About Melissa Llarena I'm a bestselling author (learn more on www.fertileideas.com), imagination coach behind the Fertile Imagination to Networking Success Group Coaching Program, consultant, speaker, contributor to ForbesWomen articles that have garnered 4 million-plus views, and the podcast host of the Mom Founder Imagination Hub. Featured guests include GaryVee, Beth Comstock, Suzy Batiz, David Meltzer, and hundreds of other unconventional thinkers. Melissa has been featured in the WSJ, Business Insider, Fox Business, CNN Money, The Huffington Post, and other publications. She holds a psychology degree from NYU, an MBA from the Tuck School of Business at Dartmouth, and a Transformational Coaching Academy certificate and is training to become a meditation practitioner. Melissa lives in Austin, Texas, with her husband and three sons (one singleton and a set of identical twins). Quotes, that can change your perspective: "Intention matters. If you feel shaky on your intention, if you are faking that you intend to have this person on your podcast, to ask this person to invest in your business, if you feel like it's transactional, it is not gonna work. You're gonna flop, it's gonna come through and your insecurities are gonna catch you. And chances are you're not gonna say what you had originally intended to say. So your intention matters." "I was in an elevator with Shelly Lazarus... I was not the most confident person in the entire building. It was something that I eventually learned and I came up with a method that I teach my clients to also use in their lives so that this way, they network with a lot more confidence than that example right there." "When I started going outside of my comfort zone, it was something that I had to make a very deliberate choice on doing, and doing a lot, and doing it in parallel with feeling the butterflies in my stomach. It was also something that I had to feel ready before I opened my mouth." - -Melissa Llarena SHARE this episode with your fellow mom founders and anyone looking to transform their networking skills! Learn how to move from a nervous novice to confidently connecting with influential figures and make networking a natural, effortless habit! Supporting Resources: Schedule a free call to see if Fertile Imagination to Networking Success my signature program is the right fit: https://www.melissallarena.com/sessions/ Podcast: Mom Founder Imagination Hub: https://www.melissallarena.com/podcast/ Instagram: https://www.instagram.com/MelissaLlarena/ Or, grab for free your copy of the "From Contact to Connection: The Mompreneur's Go-First Networking & Follow Up Playbook": https://witty-thinker-2643.ck.page/21e52edb87 Subscribe and Review Have you subscribed to my podcast for new moms who are entrepreneurs, founders, and creators? I'd love for you to subscribe if you haven't yet. I'd love it even more if you could drop a review or 5-star rating over on Apple Podcasts. Simply select "Ratings and Reviews" and "Write a Review" then a quick line with your favorite part of the episode. It only takes a second and it helps spread the word about the podcast for writer moms.
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237: Mastering Entrepreneurship and Motherhood: Leadership, Resilience, and Imagination with Randi Rubenstein
In this episode, we delve into the intricate dance of balancing entrepreneurship and motherhood, especially when raising a strong-willed child. Join us as Randi Rubenstein, parent coach, author, and founder of Mastermind Parenting, shares insights on maintaining structure, accountability, and firm yet loving boundaries. Discover how the principles of pack leadership can transform your parenting approach and draw parallels between the challenges of managing a business and raising resilient children. Embark on the emotional journey of entrepreneurial motherhood, from the lows of failed launches to the highs of tangible success. Reflect on how jealousy can serve as a catalyst for uncovering hidden dreams and transforming envy into motivation and actionable steps. Tune in for expert advice on navigating turbulent times with resilience and grace, and learn how to move beyond talking about change to actually taking action for personal and professional growth. Whether you're dealing with a strong-willed child or running a business during challenging times, this episode offers the mindset, methods, and tools to thrive. In this episode, you will hear: Challenges of juggling business responsibilities while raising children. Parallels between managing a business during turbulent times and raising resilient children. How mom founders can leverage their superpower of imagination to dream bigger. The dynamic relationship between working moms and stay-at-home moms. Identity shift and emotional challenges that come with leaving a secure job to start a business Self-reflection and turning envy into motivation and actionable steps toward goals. Emotional regulation and leadership in both parenting and business contexts. Necessity of mental preparation, accountability, and setting clear boundaries. Quotes, that can change your perspective: "What if you have a strong-willed kid and then you have another kid or multiple other kids? How are you supposed to get a handle on this? I would say it's the exact same thing, you know. The accountability piece and learning how to have that structure and have those boundaries into and to say what's okay with you as the pack leader." "A lot of women who are working many, many hours are still the ones responsible for what are we going to eat this week and what about those school forms and we need to go through your closet. You look like you're waiting for a flood." "You get out what you put into something, but it's doing the reps of whatever it is that you learned, you know, in business or in personal and holding yourself accountable for, okay, I made the investment. You could make the investment or you could have made the investment a decade ago, but you're so capable of still implementing what you learned." This episode is brought to you by Fertile Imagination to Networking Success, my 9-week group coaching program for visionary mom founders who have decided they are going to become power strategic networkers because they do not want to miss out on one more opportunity for maximum business growth! A program for a founder who wants a step-by-step process that works. My approach which I have used over and over and helped my client use too is called the Imagination to Impact and Income Method ™ and it will help you connect with the right people, lead the right conversations, and swing open the right doors to success. If you want to learn more, then schedule a free call on www.melissallarena.com/sessions today. DM me on Instagram @melissallarena just type the word SESSION and I'll share the link if that's easier to see my calendar availability for this free call where you will get all the details you'll need to know if this program is the perfect fit for you and to hear about the extra bonuses available only this summer to the first mom founders who join. Here's that link: https://www.instagram.com/melissallarena/ About Randi Rubenstein Randi Rubenstein is a renowned parent coach, author, and the visionary founder of Mastermind Parenting. With a deep-seated passion for helping parents navigate the complex journey of raising strong-willed children, Randy has become a trusted voice in the parenting community. Her expertise lies in teaching parents how to implement structure, accountability, and firm yet loving boundaries, all while fostering a nurturing and growth-oriented family environment. Randi's approach is rooted in the principles of pack leadership, emphasizing the importance of consistency, personal growth, and accountability without resorting to permissive or punitive methods. Her work rejects shame, blame, and spanking, focusing instead on a balanced strategy that combines firmness with love. This philosophy not only helps parents manage their households effectively but also draws insightful parallels to the challenges faced by entrepreneurs in the business world. SHARE this episode and discover strategies to transform your parenting and business, fostering resilience and consistency. Explore entrepreneurial motherhood, turn jealousy into motivation, and learn about our new group coaching program. Enhance your networking skills and navigate challenges with resilience. Tune in now to thrive at home and in business! Supporting Resources: Website: https://mastermindparenting.com/ Podcast: MastermindParenting Podcast: https://podcasts.apple.com/us/podcast/mastermind-parenting-podcast/id1362773053 Instagram: https://www.instagram.com/mastermind_parenting/ Facebook: https://www.facebook.com/groups/mastermindparenting Subscribe and Review Have you subscribed to my podcast for moms who are entrepreneurs, founders, and creators? I'd love for you to subscribe if you haven't yet. I'd love it even more if you could drop a review or 5-star rating over on Apple Podcasts. Simply select "Ratings and Reviews" and "Write a Review" then a quick line with your favorite part of the episode. It only takes a second and it helps spread the word about the podcast for writer moms. About Fertile Imagination to Networking Success, but first about a recent client… Michelle founded a non-profit six years ago and has since raised over $1.5M. During our first conversation she told me she spent the first year just getting the word out so she could get families to apply. And now she was shifting to really try to fundraise and grow her program. Michelle knew that this wasn't necessarily her strongest suit, she said it's hard, and I'm not great at asking for money, and I'm not great at all these things. But I knew I had to do it, and I knew I had to network, and I knew I had to do everything. That was when Michelle decided it was time to ask for help. We spoke on a 30-minute call and Michelle took a leap of faith to partner with me in my Fertile Imagination to Networking Success program. Fast forward a few weeks Michelle grew bold, bolder, ultimately her boldest self. She had this to say: And then during our time together, I just started putting myself out there saying it. My goal is $50, 000 by the year saying that to people and explaining why that was the case and what that was coming from. There wasn't an arbitrary number. It was a very well thought out plan and in terms of the numbers. That was the boldest thing I did during our time together and ask the first IVF baby to wear our merchandise. Are you at this stage, is it time to grow your business? Is networking not yet your strongest suit? Join me inside of Fertile Imagination to Networking Success: A LIVE 9-week group coaching masterclass to fast-track making connections with the right people to take your business to the next level. • 9 weeks of live networking coaching and community • Value-packed on demand curriculum on everything from navigating impostor syndrome to who to network with, how to find them, what to say, and on planning your fall and winter 2024 networking calendar focused on your business growth goal. • 3 hours/ weekly investment this summer (2 whenever or wherever you wish) to hit the ground running in the fall and feel ahead for a change • Lifetime access to tools and resources built for mom founders including meditations and unexpected ways to let go of mom guilt and overwhelm • Exclusive opportunity for the first five mom founder participants including a multimedia podcast guest feature, two private bonus sessions, and a 30% discounted investment Special extras: Daily Wins Workbook, Impostor Syndrome Journaling, and Networking Email Templates and More I'm also offering an EXCLUSIVE bonus for the first five mom founders only which is a guide on how to boost your productivity as a solopreneur and/or delegate or farm out things in your business so you can easily fit this into your summer calendar. Go to www.melissallarena.com/sessions to schedule a 30-minute call with me to learn more about Fertile Imagination to Networking Success for Mom Founders and jump in on this exclusive summer offer for the first five mom founders. Summer school is starting soon. Be one of the first 5 mom founders to join.
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239
236: Feel the Pressure When Attending Networking Events? Anticipating Some This Fall?
You've joined so many associations, networking associations, maybe even membership groups, you've attended conferences, you experienced networking, quote-unquote, societies, tried happy hours, gone to Toastmasters. So why is it that just the thought about going to networking events is still scary? Here's something that I've realized. It's because there's something missing. There's something missing from your strategy, and in this episode, I want to share with you exactly what that is. Now, if you're like a lot of my clients, usually you might be in a relationship, for example, where your partner is really good at schmoozing. They are great at going to events, connecting the dots, connecting people, and you might be a little jealous of that. The simple fact that it comes so naturally to them, but maybe not to you. Yet as a business owner, you might also realize that whether it comes naturally to you or not, it is so important and critical to your business growth. And this might be exactly what you want to work on and be ready to do and execute upon by this fall. So listen up. Here's the thing. This is how you know that you're not yet prepared to take full advantage of all of these things that I just mentioned. Again, those events that are coming up, those membership opportunities, those associations that you want to be a part of. This is how you know that you're not really ready and not really going to extract the real value of connecting with people who could accelerate your business. This is how do you still feel like networking is transactional? Have you felt that maybe networking is sleazy? Or do you just feel like there's a lot of pressure? A lot of pressure when you think about going to networking events. Because if that is where you are right now, then that's not the actual problem. The fact that a networking event is a sleazy place or it's a place of only transactions. That's not the real issue. Going to these events, it's not like exposure therapy that the more you go to them, the better off you'll feel. Chances are you'll still feel nervous before going to them if you don't yet have a solid strategy. Okay. Let's talk about this strategy. So the solid strategy that you need in order to no longer feel scared or nervous about attending events has to include these things. This strategy must help you prepare. Before going to events so that this way, when you're at the events, people already know you, this strategy also has to help you feel more confident and be more approachable and armed with topics related to small talk that don't feel random or pointless like the weather. This strategy that I'm talking about also needs to arm you with knowing exactly when and how to follow up without feeling like you're pestering people. So let me share with you a little bit about my strategy, a little bit about my method. It is called the imagination to impact to income method, and it solves for everything that I just listed out. Imagine this, imagine going to a networking event and already knowing who's going to be there, what stories you're going to share and how you're going to show up in addition to even how you're going to dress. What if having that pre-thought out and already curated is what it actually takes to no longer have to feel nervous or hesitant or unsure, or like there's a lot of pressure when you attend a networking event, a networking event that you may have already paid for, right? So those conferences that you have to fly to and then figure out the logistics for the kids that you leave behind. Like, what if you had this method that could help you really, I mean, just like own the room and feel completely like you belonged in the room as the leader of your business. That is what my method helps you do. This method, the imagination to impact income method, that's the centerpiece of my group coaching program for mom founders. And if this episode resonates then let's connect: https://www.instagram.com/melissallarena/ The program is called fertile imagination to networking success, and we could absolutely have a conversation this week. So that this way you have a really clear understanding for how this program can help you completely set yourself up for success come the fall. Once you have these events to attend, once you have these opportunities that you should be emotionally ready for. And literally ready for, as in like already predetermined on your calendar right now. All of this is covered during the group coaching program with me, during which time you and I and a group of five mom founders will figure this out in time for the fall. This episode is brought to you by the "Fertile Imagination for Networking Success" Program Are you tired of attending networking events only to feel overwhelmed and underprepared? Do you crave meaningful connections but struggle to navigate the networking landscape effectively? It's time to revolutionize your approach to networking with our exclusive program designed for mom founders like you. Why This Program Is For You Imagine stepping into any networking event with confidence, knowing exactly who to connect with, what to say, and how to make a lasting impression. Our program, "Fertile Imagination for Networking Success," is your roadmap to mastering the art of networking and unlocking new opportunities for your business. What Sets This Program Apart Unlike generic networking advice, our program is tailored specifically for mom founders, recognizing the unique challenges and opportunities you face. Led by me (a mom of three with 12-years in business), my comprehensive curriculum combines live coaching sessions, on-demand resources, and a supportive community to ensure your success. What You'll Learn Strategic Preparation: Discover how to prepare effectively for networking events, ensuring you make the most of every opportunity. Confidence Building: Overcome self-doubt and imposter syndrome, empowering you to present yourself confidently and authentically. Meaningful Connections: Learn how to forge genuine connections with key individuals, turning brief encounters into valuable relationships. Follow-Up Strategies: Master the art of follow-up, ensuring you stay top-of-mind and nurture your network for long-term success. What's Included Nine Weeks of Live Coaching: Join our expert-led coaching sessions to receive personalized guidance and support every step of the way. On-Demand Curriculum: Access our library of resources at your convenience, tackling everything from networking strategies to mindset shifts. Exclusive Community: Connect with like-minded mom founders, share insights, and celebrate your successes in our supportive community. Special Bonuses for 5 Mom Founders This Summer Only Exclusive Podcast Opportunity: Be featured as a guest on a top-rated podcast, gaining exposure to a wider audience of industry leaders and influencers. Private Bonus Sessions: Receive exclusive one-on-one sessions focused on calming pre-event nerves and implementing your networking strategies effectively. Limited Time Offer Enrollment is limited to the first five mom founders, who will receive a 30% discounted rate and access to our exclusive bonuses. Don't miss this opportunity to supercharge your networking skills and propel your business to new heights. Ready to Transform Your Networking Experience? Join us for the "Fertile Imagination for Networking Success" program and discover the power of strategic networking tailored for mom founders like you. Reserve your spot today and take the first step towards unlocking a world of opportunities for your business. How to Join Ready to take your business to the next level? Here's how to get started: Visit melissallarena.com/sessions Fill out the application to ensure it's the right fit. Schedule a conversation with me this month to secure your spot. Remember, only the first five mom founders will receive the exclusive bonuses, including the 30% discount, productivity resource, two private sessions, and the podcast guest spot. Don't miss this opportunity to grow your business and make meaningful connections. Visit www.melissallarena.com/sessions and apply now!
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235: This Austin-Based Community Builder Will Teach You How to Make Mom Friends
Do you wish you had mom friends who would push you, who would get you out of a rut? Do you feel like you don't have a community that you belong in? I know this pops up oftentimes during the summer season. And so I wanted this conversation to soothe your soul and give you a chance to change that. Let's connect if this resonates with you: https://www.instagram.com/melissallarena/ Do you ever feel lonely? I can relate. As a mom in those early days, the feeling of loneliness was all too familiar. I remember nursing my son, waiting for my husband to get home, and feeling the weight of solitude. Similarly, when I launched my business, I found myself at my kitchen table grappling with business challenges without a sounding board. Loneliness is not uncommon for moms or entrepreneurs, but it has certainly been amplified by the pandemic. However, amidst these challenges, we now have the option to connect online. That's why today's conversation is so important. Allow me to introduce you to Cherie Werner, a proud Austinite for 35 years and the founder and CEO of Fiesta, an inclusive startup community. Cherie brings a wealth of experience and a deep commitment to fostering success and connections. I'm thrilled to host this conversation because I believe connecting with others who share similar experiences or have advanced perspectives in motherhood or entrepreneurship is crucial for success. So, enjoy the conversation with Cherie and notice her "fertile imagination", a guide for maximizing every mom's superpower for maximum impact. That's the title of my book, by the way. Cherie exemplifies this imagination by creating unique connections and community, especially when she decided to homeschool her daughters. You'll hear how she achieved this, involving dads, kids, and families in a vibrant community. It's a testament to what's possible when you awaken and stretch your imagination, a process I detail in my book, which you can find at www.fertileideas.com. Also noteworthy is that this episode is brought to you by: From Contact to Connection: The Mompreneur's Go-First Networking & Follow Up Playbook: https://witty-thinker-2643.ck.page/21e52edb87 Download my step by step networking and follow-up process, as well as out-of-the-box proven ways to build relationships with the busiest of influencers, prospective podcast guests, and mentors! WARNING: this is for ambitious AF moms with growing businesses. AND BONUS: 30-second elevator pitch template included! The free playbook helps you: -Write an elevator pitch that will be memorable and distinguish you from everyone else. -Improve your networking skills, especially if you're a mom founder who can't go out and leave it to chance that she'll meet the business investor, mentor, or partner of her dreams. -Learn how to become a better networker without feeling like a fish out of water. -Write your emails to introduce yourself to strangers without overthinking how to begin an email or how to prove in the email that speaking with you will be worth their time. -Push beyond the fear that often holds you back, thinking "Oh, I can't do that" or "Who am I to approach that person?" -Think strategically about your outreach goals by considering why you want to talk to specific people, along with what you need to know so you don't get caught out there feeling like a deer in headlights without the right words to say. -Think ahead about how you intend to make it worth their time and how you can use your platform to feature them as an expert, among other things. -Calm your networking jitters beforehand by guiding you on how to research the event and its attendees before heading out. -Gain fresh ideas for follow-ups that will feel good to you and the recipient, instead of just emailing the person over and over again. -Use a timeframe to conduct your networking or outreach efforts so they become a habit. -And includes email templates galore! Official bio for Cherie I'm Cherie Werner—a native Texan and a proud Austinite for 35 years. As the Founder and (CEO) Chief Empowerment Officer of FIESTA, an inclusive startup community, I bring a wealth of experience and a deep commitment to fostering success and connections. With 38 years of marriage to Jon Werner and our three daughters as my top priorities, my journey in mentoring began in college. It evolved into a rich history of community building, exemplified by the growth of the Austin WholeHearted Home School community (1995-2001). Collaborating on startup ventures like Bones in Motion (2001-2008) and KOYA Innovations (2018-2023) has equipped me with unique insights and empathy into the founder's journey. At FIESTA, we've hosted over 50 events, welcoming 7,000+ attendees since July 2021, and achieved a remarkable 65% growth in 2023 and 2022. As a certified life coach, I am dedicated to creating a dynamic environment where entrepreneurs can thrive, forge meaningful relationships, be seen, and succeed. I am excited to bring this spirit of collaboration, empowerment, and drive to the vibrant Austin Tech community. Links: https://fiesta.community https://www.instagram.com/cheriewerner/ https://www.facebook.com/cherie.werner Transcript: Cherie, I wanted to just launch the conversation around the idea of seeking connection and community. So I know that for moms, it feels, it feels lonely, especially those early days when you're a new mom. And when you're just like wondering to yourself, how did I, how am I going to do this? How am I going to survive? And then entrepreneurship is kind of the same thing. At least. At first, it's a lonely endeavor. And so you're at a different mom stage than me. I have school age kids. You have adults. So first, like, are we going to survive? And then second, share some wisdom that can help us feel connected. And like, we're part of something bigger than ourselves. Yeah. Wow. Wow. Great question. Yes, you will survive at times. You might feel like you're not surviving and just remember that it's a season and it too shall pass. And I think the other thing is you never, you're never not a mom. I mean, my adult children have said, yeah, but I need my mom, even though they're adult children. And then I think that you have your biological children, but then you also have the chosen children. So I'm known in this ecosystem as a startup mama. And I think it's because a lot of these young millennials and startup founders that are coming here to Austin, they, they need a mom. They need someone that they can call or just it sees them and is cheering them on. I think that's the biggest role for moms is that you're involved in your kiddos lives and you're cheering them on and you want the best for them. One of the mantras that we had and I, and this came later in the teen years was that our ceiling is their floor only as much as we're investing in ourselves and growing our children have higher grounds to stand on. I love that. I really love that. And so I'm wondering more about your motherhood journey. So early on, just to give us perspective, because right now a lot of moms are having to make that tough choice between full on entrepreneurship. Let's get some funding. Let's just try to outsource a lot of motherhood so that this way we can like be that at the helm of business. Right. And for some of us, like myself, it's kind of like, well, that's scary. Like I have these three little boys and I kind of like them and I want to really help shape their, their perspective on a lot of things. I want to be there. I want to be their people leader, you know? And so I'm curious, like when you first became a mom, like what were the decisions that you had to make and looking back, like, how do you feel about them? Another great question. I was a mom. It seems like so long ago And it was a long time ago because just for perspective my daughters I have three daughters and they're 35 33 and 22 and yes, there's a 10 year gap between the youngest and the middle one and Same marriage i've married going on 38 or 39 years. I can't remember exactly which one but When we, when I was pregnant with my first child, I always intended to go back to work. We were living up in the D. C. area, and I mean, there was no way we could afford the home that we were in and stuff like that, unless both of us were working. And after having my daughter, I had maternity leave, and once that was over, and I had to go back into work, I didn't anticipate having this strong emotional attachment to my daughter. I mean, to the point where I'm like, I can't leave her. I don't want to leave her. And my husband and I made a decision that I would stay at home. And, and I really, I mean, like, I was really scared to be a mom. I, I had, I mean, I, I have a good relationship with my mom today, but my mom. Did the best that she could with the knowledge that she had just like I think all moms need to give themselves that grace and you're doing the best that you can with the knowledge that you have at that time, because me as a mom with my older daughters and my youngest completely different. I was more relaxed with the youngest. But when Karen was was born, I stayed at home and I loved it. And, and then Courtney came along and we moved like two weeks after she was born from Virginia to Austin. Now, something nobody ever told me about, there are high stressors in women's lives and you need to be careful in how many stressors are going off at one time. And so we were moving, I was leaving this amazing chosen family, like that brought meals over, they cleaned my house, they helped me because I was on bed rest with my Second child and and she came, she was like four weeks premature and so then we take off. We leave Virginia. We drive, we drive to Texas and we're in a house. My husband goes to work. I'm left alone. And I kind of had what I thought was a breakdown. But like looking back, it was postpartum depression. And uh, Yeah, and I didn't have the support so like moving to a new place and not having support that so that just goes to show you the value and the importance of having that community. I mean, we all need it from very early on from our family of origin into all these different seasons of life. Yeah, and I think it's, it's interesting because I think it's something that before I hit record, we were talking about, which is this whole idea of relational poverty. I had never heard of that. And I know that you do a great job in the Fiesta community in terms of making sure that people know one another. We actually like get to see one another, have like mini little groups together, the breakout sessions. And I appreciate that. And so I'm just wondering, okay. Just to kind of like walk listeners through this. So you started out, you had a chosen family, you had like what I'm envisioning, like this ideal scenario where somebody brought you food. Like, that's like amazing. And then now you're like driving all the way to Texas. You don't know anyone, but you have two children at the time. And then you land there, your husband goes to work. And then you're like, Oh my goodness. Like that, that to me does sound a little bit like relational poverty. Is that kind of like in reference to the similar thing? Well, I mean, relational poverty, as I defined it, it's a deep lack of connectedness with others. So I didn't have the connectedness. I, we knew nobody here in Austin. John was, took a job with IBM. So he knew the people he was working with. And we need that deep connectedness with other individuals. Like, just to give you a contrast, I knew nobody at first, like for the first month, we were staying in a hotel room with two little ones. And then compared to Virginia, when we were up there, like I said, we, I met together with this group of women and couples and, and we were involved in a church up there at the time. And so like, it was, it wasn't just going to church. It was like, we had this really intentional community with several of the guys that my husband was working with in, in there. Wives and I was always really nervous about being a mom because my parents divorced early on and my mom Had an aneurysm when I was like eighth grade and I had always wanted to be close I'm I'm I'm I'm a loyalist and eight on the in a six on the enneagram and I just wanted that close nurturing relationship But I remember when she had the aneurysm and she was in the hospital, she kind of drew me close to her. And she said, this is why I never got close to you and your sister. And I was thinking, like thinking about that. I just think, gosh, that's so sad because we missed out on, on, on this fear of, of what could happen versus being in the moment. And Making the most of that moment and so I think that was like a real pivotal time in my life because I never felt that connectedness with my mom early on and and so I wanted to provide that for my kiddos. I wanted them to know as a as a family. We had a Oh, I I'm trying to think of, but it's, it's like a thing that we put, these are our models as a family, we will be connected no matter how big or, or far apart we are from each other. And, and, and that is just that intentional intentionality of reaching out, letting them know that, that we're thinking about them. And we we've done that. I mean, we started the, the Koya company together, which was all about it. Helping to end relational poverty. And this is before COVID, COVID accelerated and, and, and, and really brought that to light, like the importance and what loneliness does to individuals. So if anything good came out of COVID, I think that that's one thing that it's okay to talk about mental health and the need not to isolate and be around other individuals, because it's important. And we're made that way. Yeah. I, I, I mean, it's evolutionary, right? So it's like, if you're not in a group, then you are at risk for, for death. So that's, that's a lot of times why people have this like massive fear of abandonment, because it's like you that if you don't have your clan, or you're not in a clan, it's kind of like, wow, there's, there's a lot that you have to do to fend for yourself. And so it's, it's interesting in the sense that when I think about a mom who has to make, you know, A similar choice now, right? And we're in a different era, but kind of feels familiar in the sense that society is set up in a certain way, granted now internet speeds are fast and everything. But at the same time, you mentioned that whole deep, deep, deep connection. And I can't really say that when I'm on a Zoom call, I feel like this, like, deep connection. Like, it's like, you, you might meet the person, but on the surface, kind of get to know them, facts and figures, things like that. But there, there is that beauty of like in person events, which I know that you definitely create that atmosphere. And, and when you were a mom early on in Austin, you still figured out a way to build that sense of community and in person deep connection. And I think it's, it's a good use of your imagination. You have a fertile imagination, which is the name of my book. So why don't you share? With listeners, kind of like how that idea of like connecting with other moms or homeschooling came about and what did you learn about that that maybe you use in Fiesta? Yeah, so I, I, I'm like, it's so funny, the things that I've done in life, I, I, I, I would say I'm the least likely person to have done that. So when my daughters, we moved from Austin to California. And when we moved to California, my husband took a job and he was traveling a lot. And because of his travel schedule and, and, and also my experience in, in being in school, like, I can remember not really liking school, especially elementary school and being very, I, I was diagnosed with ADD, but that's a long time ago. And, but people who have ADD, what I realized is that we're super creative, think outside the box kind of folks. And, and one of the, the, the problems with the educational system is that it makes you, it puts you in this box that kind of follows you along and have a hard time seeing yourself outside of that. It wasn't until I got to college that I could see myself differently. And anyway, while I was in California. My, my daughter's Karen and Courtney, they're so opposite. I mean, Karen came out and I mean, laughing and just bubbly and, and Courtney is more introspective. And at the time was more sensitive. I mean, I can remember if you raised your voice and I I'm, I'm expressive. So I raised my voice. I it's not yelling, but she would cry. And I thought to myself, and I have no idea why, but I'm like, man, I feel like if she goes to school, who she's created to be is going to be warped. And, and I, I'm like, kids are going to like tear her to pieces if she cries on the playground for everything. And, and so I started looking into homeschooling and I went to a meeting and when I walked in, unlike here in Texas at the time, the people who homeschooled that I knew, I mean, like, They made their own bread and they wore jumpers and I'm like, I will never homeschool. That's what I remember vividly saying. I would never homeschool. And, and, and so, but in California. It looked a lot different and, and, and I, because I, nobody was wearing the jumpers and I went to this event and they brought out this big boa constrictor cause it was like a kids zoo day and the kids were all sitting around and families and stuff like that. And I just thought, wow, that looks, this looks really cool. And so that I started looking more into it and reading about it. And then I came across. A gal named Sally Clarkson, who for moms, I mean, but it's from a, a Christian perspective, her books were, she was my mentor from afar. So people, moms are like, If, if you can't have a in person mentor, books can be your mentor's podcast. She has an incredible podcast. I mean, she used to do conferences and then I got really involved in that. And I was on, on their board for about 10 years and they were out of Colorado and they would do these conferences in Dallas and Colorado and all over. And. So that's, that was my mentorship into it. And when I came back to Austin, I'm like, I don't want to be like that as, as a homeschool. I want, I want homeschooling to look exciting and have a way to bring not just the moms together, but couples together and the kids together, like for a PE co op and like a library day. And so I created the wholehearted. Austin wholehearted homeschoolers, and we had probably 75 families that were part of it over the course of seven years, and it wasn't until 2001 that I stepped away, which is when I was pregnant with my youngest, and the reason being is because I again had some preterm labor type of issues, and, um. And I, I mean, I enjoyed it because it was a way everybody talked about socialization while we were socializing. I mean, we were like my daughter, Karen, probably wouldn't be the photographer she is, but at the age of 14, we gave her a camera for her birthday and at 15, she and I went to Dallas and she took this. Week long photography course, did her first wedding at 15 and, and, and started her career that way. I think with the kids, they were able to experience life based off of what they were really interested in. And to this day, I don't know if my daughters would have traveled as much as they traveled, had they not had that experience. So yes, that's how homeschooling came about. I, I, and Kaylee, when she came in, it came time for schooling her. We put her in a private school for like two or three years and she was struggling. And then I homeschooled her and she continued to struggle. And then we had her tested and we realized that she had something called dyscalculia, which is like dyslexic, but for math. And had she been in a school setting, that would have never been diagnosed, number one, probably, and number two, I, at that point, didn't make math a big issue, because it's like, okay, she's not going to be a mathematician, we're going to figure this out, and I remember going to a counselor and them saying, well, she might not ever go to college, you know, and I'm like, The labels we put on kids and the things that we say about kids really impact them. And that's one of the problems, like with the school system I had was I saw these kids that were in reading groups and this is the, the advanced reading group. This was the normal reading group, but these were the kids that were behind and that would follow them in elementary school from grade to grade. So that's why I like the idea of. Just bringing people of all ages, I think together, the one, the one room schoolhouse to me is very appealing. So, yeah, my, my twins actually had like a one room schoolhouse, but it was Montessori, right? So different years and then there was like a leader and then like they got to choose their own work and practical life was part of it. So like, I totally understand like the whole, like some of the nuances. And I know people who ironically are actually. Teachers in the school system who homeschool their kids. It's like, okay, wait a minute. Hmm. Why is that? You wonder. I have to share something with you. A lot of moms that I've partnered with, mom founders, have told me that following up after going to networking events tends to be hard, awkward, and a lot of them really don't know how to do it. And that's why I decided to write a playbook that is absolutely free for you to download. If you've ever felt awkward or like networking has been transactional or following up has been impossible to kind of do consistently, it's called From Contact to Connection. It's the Mompreneur's Go First Networking and Follow Up Playbook. I wanted to just share why is it go first? It's go first because I've heard from moms that hey, I actually do like networking as long as other people approach me. And my whole thing is that it is important for you to create your own opportunities and I want to empower you to do so. So my gift to you as a listener of this podcast is my playbook. You will have an opportunity to download my personal step by step networking and follow up process, as well as out of the box proven ways to build relationships with the busiest of influencers. with perspective podcast guests and mentors too. And you don't have to just be a podcaster to get the benefits. You have to be a mom founder though, to really see the results by way of your income, by implementing my strategies. Now, I do want to say that I also offered a bonus 30 second elevator pitch template. I share with you my pitch. I give you a Mad Libs style Template that you can fill in the blanks and my intention is really to be sure that you have a starter kit to help you go out there and network, whether you're doing it now or come this fall. Now, this playbook really, really packs a punch of value. It's going to help you improve your networking skills. Even if you're a mom founder, and maybe you're in the season where you can't go out there and schmooze with people at happy hours, maybe you're the type of person that is going to have to figure out how to get people to Zoom with you one on one. And I've got you covered in this playbook. In this playbook, I'm going to help you become a better networker. So this way you don't feel like a fish out of the water. So you'll see some templates and ways that I have approached pretty big name people. And you'll want to use my language and edit it to your tone so that this way people have a good idea for who you are and you could feel more authentic about your emails out. In the playbook, you're going to have an opportunity to really push beyond the fear that often holds you back. For example, Oh, I can't do that, or who am I to approach that person? No, I will be encouraging you. I will be that person in your little pocket telling you, go for it, in this playbook. You'll also have an opportunity to think more strategically about your outreach goals. So let's just imagine this September, you want to reach out to prospective investors. I give you some questions to really think through of who exactly you would want to connect with. So there's a lot that happens in this playbook. Again, the elevator pitch is also part of it. I would encourage you to head on over to the show notes today, and you will see a direct link for the playbook. Or you could simply type into, um, any browser, fertileideas. com. So head on over to fertileideas. com for your copy of this playbook. It's specific for mom founders. You're also going to have an opportunity in the playbook to calm your networking jitters because I'm going to share with you how I research before reaching out to people. And that has made all the difference for me and my clients. You will also have a good sense of a good timeframe to actually do these follow up activities. A lot of times we tend to feel like we're being annoying or we're being persistent, but honestly, there's a right and wrong way of doing it. So I want to share with you what's worked for me in my playbook. So head on over to fertile ideas. com. I so appreciate that you're listening to this conversation and enjoy the rest of the episode. I, I think the thing I've learned is, is I really, I think it really depends on, on you and why you're doing what you're doing. So, as I said early, it was a way for us to be together with my husband when he was home and then when he was traveling and then I really, school became fun for me. So like, as I prepared and learned things. I was excited about it. The kids really grasped it. They understood it better. But if I didn't like it, they didn't like it for the most part. So teacher really does impact the love that I, I think the most important task is to teach a child to learn, and they will always learn. As young adults, even now me doing what I do, it involves so much computer stuff that Technology. I didn't have those skills. I've had to kind of teach it my learn it myself and go on and look at videos and stuff. So Yeah. Yeah. And I think a lot of what you're sharing is the fact that. There's, there's like these like misunderstandings about connection and community. And I think one misunderstanding, and for me, it's something that I'm getting from this conversation. And it's this, it's like somebody else doesn't have to actually create that community for you. Like, you actually can take ownership. Of creating your own community and in a situation like you just shared, like homeschooling, like I've heard, like, oh, the kids are going to not be socialized and it's so lonely and blah, blah, blah. But what I heard you say is that even in that situation. When other people specifically were like, Oh, socialization there, there goes that like you still manage to use your imagination to create community and like get the deep connections that you were looking for. And you moved again. Like I didn't, I didn't not notice that I'm like, wow. Okay. So I think it's, it's interesting because something that I know a lot of moms. Struggle with now is this lack of making mom friends. Like, I know it's a little bit off topic, but it's still like connection and deep, real conversation. Like, so you moved from Virginia to Texas, to California, or something like that. Virginia, Texas, Texas, California. And then like two and a half years later came back to Texas. And so like, okay. So that in my opinion, I'm like, okay. So. Sheree, what is the key to establishing and keeping great mom friends, especially if you're moving around? Yeah, you know, I, I think there's season. So everywhere I've gone, I've had friendships and, and I mean, I still keep in touch with him. I tend to be the one that picks up the phone and calls. I think that life. So here's the deal. When I was raising Karen and Courtney, we. There were clear boundaries like in there was those in between moments to be with others and you would drive 30 minutes or whatever to be with a friend like we what was really interesting about our homeschool group was they were from all over Austin and and I had people driving 45 minutes in for events. I think once technology became more widely used and stuff like that, people like you didn't meet in homes anymore. You met out at restaurants and you were, you never had those boundaries because you had a phone ringing or pinging you or, or, and things like that. And, and those are all distractions. I think two relationships, deep relationships, because time. Is, is the one commodity that we can't get back. And, and there's so many things competing for our attention. And I know for myself. You have to be super intentional, like how and who are you gonna spend time with? And, and again, right now I'm in a season of life that is really different than most people because we just moved my in law, my husband's an only child, from New Orleans, where they flipped all of their life, 50 years, in the same four bedroom house to a one bedroom apartment, and they're going to be who we invest and spend more time with right now because it's, that's a season of life that we're in. And, and I have my other obligations. So I think it's better to go deep with one or two people who really get you and understand and put it on the calendar, like that intentionality and say, okay, this is what I want from the relationship, kind of defining it. And I, I, I, I just, there's. Life is so complex, right? We all need counselors someone to talk to because like when that becomes the focus of a friendship and it's one sided the other person will eventually like I And I, I need something else because it's about giving and receiving. And, and so it's like, make sure that you're comfortable with who you are and that you have something to give to somebody. And the saying that says, you know why I like you? Because you like me. And then you want to spend that time together. So, I mean, yeah, it's, I mean, You tend to want to find friends that are close by because the idea of having to drive, especially when you have two, three kids is, is hard. I think finding mentors in your life as you're going through these different seasons. And my husband and I always said, you know, look for the next season of life for you. So if, if you're newly married and know you want to have kids, finding a couple that has kids that you can hang out with and watch them, because that. Hugely impacted my desire to want to have kids for the, for the longest. I didn't think I wanted kids or children. And then I was around this one couple and I watched them interact with their kiddos. And I'm like, Oh my gosh, is that what parenting looks like? I mean, I just, I, I was mesmerized by how they interacted with their three boys. And it just was like, Wow. Okay. I can do that. I want to do that. So that's amazing. I think, I mean, it's, it's important to just kind of have a good sense of what's, what's possible. What's something that maybe you never considered was within your cards and, and might actually bring you joy and happiness, right? You can't tell if you're not in the room and kind of experiencing that laughter, you know, yeah. It's inviting for sure. So let's imagine that not from a spaceship, although that was the thought that came in my mind, but let's imagine there's like this mom, brand new mom, she just got here to Austin this year and she has a business idea. And she's just like, okay, I'm here. I heard this is where technology is buzzing. And there's all these like startups and app people. What should she do first so that she starts to kind of get to know what's available to her in terms of support and resources in Austin? Wow. Well, so part of why I started Fiesta was to make things more easily accessible. I really feel like communities. I don't know if you've traveled abroad, but I've gone to Germany. And one of the things I love is that you have these town centers and everything centers around this town center. You have your baker, the. Everything and into one another. And so. I mean, Austin is big and trying to find those resources online is, is, is important. It depends on what type of, I mean, what she's trying to build. Is she wanting to focus more on work type of relationships? Then I would say finding time to network will be important. And, you know, I've created a calendar to help folks find events easy. And there's, there's mom groups, there's co ed groups. There's so much here in Austin. I mean, I literally, you can be busy almost every night of the week doing stuff. If you're, I mean, finding groups that maybe you're based off of, of cultural interest, I think that's also helpful. And. Meet up event. Right. You can Google it these days. It's so easily accessible. And then the places that you hang out because I do think that spending time in the car with kiddos that are screaming and not happy that just kind of grates on you as a mom. And it's like, by the time you get there, you're just like, Where, where you're going and it's not so like finding that happy in between place where you don't have to spend hours or in the car because of the crazy traffic here. And I think that's the case in other places. It's nice. One of the nice things about COVID is that. We're more aware of how to use virtual stuff. So I think using that, if you have a friend from another place, keeping that relationship going, because you get each other in and putting it on the calendar, again, intentionality, you have to be intentional, put it on the calendar because if it's not on the calendars, Likely not to happen, but if you put it on the calendar and something comes up, you can always change it. So that's why I, I say put it on the calendar and yeah, so, and have a support. I mean, like, I think this is a conversation before having kiddos that couples need to have is, is knowing what. Your desires are because I think some women really are created to be career women. They, they, they've always wanted to be an attorney. I, I think of this one gal that works over at Perkin and Cooey and she just got a nu some kind of a, a award for what she does. But she just had her fifth child of Alaska. She was at the event we were at on Wednesday night and. She has worked as an attorney all of this time and, and, and her baby is probably two months old. And I mean, she just flew in and, and, but again, that's a conversation I'm sure she and her husband had that this is what I want to do. This is why I went to school. I want you to. Will you support me in this? And, and what will that look like? So for couples, it could be the husband picking up a lot more of the load, or it could be that you hire folks to come in to help with the childcare and then when they're old enough, I mean, you do childcare. So those are all decisions I think to make ahead of time as a couple, you know, before you get there. Would help. And then if you have family close by, can they help out? I think I love the conversations we were having on Wednesday that as women are involved in companies in advocating for child care on premise with them, that's things are going to start to change and they are changing. I mean, it's a lot different than when I Was having kiddos. So, I mean, I think it's only going to get better. And I jokingly say, I think the Barbie movie has done a lot for, for, for that too, like the, the whole stereotyping that, you know, you can work, but can you work and have a family? And I think you can, it's just a discussion that needs to be had. Yeah, Cherie, thank you for this. I think this is important. A lot of, a lot of moms are, and I, and I find it slightly hilarious, if I'm being honest. It's kind of like, I don't know, I kind of feel like women have always been having babies. Like, this is not new. Yeah. It's like, Why are we still talking about the same thing? Right. But I mean, there's, there's a lot of things that are involved and a lot of different priorities that have to be decided upon ideally by the woman herself. And then there's also choices. And, and I just want to caveat, like if you're high powered in your field and you have those hours, I think every mom needs to just be really, really honest with herself and understand that. There's some, there's a support system behind that sister, like, like there's no way on this earth that you could like duplicate yourself yet until AI really gets advanced, but, but I think there's, there's options, there's also options in, in not having to feel lonely, whether you're a mom or an entrepreneur. And I think as far as. Your experiences early on with like homeschooling, like you, you share the fact that you could use your imagination to really figure out what you need, everybody needs something a little different. Some people don't want to be smothered and some people want a lot of love. And some people want, you know, something with a little bit more. I don't even know, like something that's a little more defined, for example, in terms of a relationship. So, Cherie, let's say that people want to continue to follow you, learn more about you, learn about Fiesta. Where should they go online? What website should we point them to and social media? Yeah, so fiesta. community. com, community. And is the website, if you are an entrepreneur, if you're looking for events and things of that sort, you can find me on Sri Werner on Instagram and Facebook. And it's Sri at Fiesta dot communities, my email, if you want to reach out to me and yeah, those are the big things. And I just want to encourage moms. I mean, like, remember this is a season and I think that being a mom. Actually best prepared me for what I'm doing today. I learned so much because there's that one image out there that shows if you paid a mom for everything that she does, cause she, she's a caregiver. She, do you know what I'm talking about? Have you seen that? Okay. Good driver. Everything. Exactly. And, and we need to, I mean like we need to remind each other of the fact that we do a lot and we have a lot to offer. And, and instead of judging one another, if we're, this is where it goes back to emotional generosity that we were talking about earlier on. Like, Pointing out something to a mom and, and encouraging her or a working woman, just saying, Hey, you bring so much to this arena. I'm so glad that you're choosing to work and offering, like, is there anything I can do to help you? Or do you need anything? And, and just being that person to, to ask. And then I think as women, it's okay to vocalize it's hard. I'm struggling. I, I, I'm not doing a good job. I need help. I mean, like, learn those words and, and use them because that only way that other people can be let in is if you let them in. So to all the moms out there, if, if you need somebody, reach out, let them know. And, and I, I, I mean, we're such a supportive community. I know. You will find somebody that will step up to be there for you. Absolutely. Thank you, Cherie. Yeah, thank you. When it comes to some of the first people that I met here in Austin after our time in Australia, Cherie was one of those individuals who had and offered a very warm smile. So here are the three things that I want to share with you as it relates to finding community wherever you are and not feeling so lonely as a mom, nor as an entrepreneur. So this is what I got from the conversation with Cherie. So the first point is you have to be intentional, be intentional about creating connections, understand what you need from those relationships. But be intentional, put it on your calendar or it won't happen. The second one is go for deep connections. And if you are just zooming with individuals, then that is going to be pretty surface level unless you've been in the same room and shared a cup of coffee, for example, which is something that here in Austin, we do a lot. And that's actually a little new for me as a New Yorker. So deep relationships really make a difference. They're awesome and helpful for your mental health. And then the third point is the one that I love about. Finding friends or people to connect with who are ahead of you along your mom stage or motherhood journey. I think having a perspective of what it looks like to be the parent of a teenager or having the perspective of what it looks like, or it can look like to be an empty nester when you're a mom like me with kids in school is a good thing to seek. So those are the three things that I think are really important as it relates to the conversation with Sheree. And I really invite you to connect with Sheree, go to a Fiesta event. If you're here based in Austin, say hello. Cause I will probably be there too and have a wonderful, wonderful day. Again, you're not alone. You're totally not alone. If anything, you have me here on the other side of this microphone. So definitely reach out to me, [email protected] And I will say hi back. Pinky promise.
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234: Need Outside Motivation for Your Business Growth This Summer
Struggling to stay motivated and keep your business on track during the summer? Discover how you can transform these months into a powerhouse of productivity and growth. Join us as we dive into actionable strategies tailored for mom founders, ensuring you hit the ground running this fall. Don't let another summer slip by—tune in now to learn how to leverage this time for maximum business impact. Let's connect if this resonates with you: https://www.instagram.com/melissallarena/ And if this opportunity is what you need this summer then… Join My Exclusive Summer Group Coaching Program for Mom Founders This summer, I'm inviting five dedicated mom founders to join me in my exclusive group coaching program, Fertile Imagination to Networking Success. This program is designed to help you develop a clear, actionable plan to grow your business. You'll know exactly what to do and how to do it, ensuring you're on the right track for success. What's Unique About This Opportunity? Only the first five mom founders who join me will get access to an incredible range of bonuses, making this a truly exclusive and transformative experience. Exclusive Bonuses for the First Five Enrollees: Private Session 1 for Implementation: A 45-minute session where we'll develop a ready-to-go networking strategy for the fall. You won't feel lonely in this; we'll work side by side to plan and execute your strategy. Private Session 2 for Elevator Pitch: Overcome nerves and anxiety with a private session focused on perfecting your elevator pitch and confidently introducing yourself to new contacts. 30% Discount: For the first five mom founders, a special discount on the program fee. Productivity Resource Guide: Tools to help you take tasks off your plate, allowing you to focus more on valuable networking activities. Podcast Guest Spot: Be a guest on my podcast, you'll be in great company given awesome my prior guests like Gary Vaynerchuk, Beth Comstock, and Suzy Batiz. This will instantly boost your credibility and visibility. Program Details Fertile Imagination to Networking Success is a comprehensive nine-week program that requires just three hours per week, two of which can be accessed on demand. Here's what you get: Live Networking, Coaching, and Community: Nine weeks of live sessions focused on building a supportive community and providing actionable networking strategies. Value-Packed On-Demand Curriculum: Topics include overcoming imposter syndrome, identifying and connecting with key contacts, and planning your fall and winter 2024 networking calendar. Lifetime Access: Access to my proven Imagination to Impact to Income method, tools for seamless networking, and resources tailored specifically for mom founders. Specialized Tools and Resources: Including meditations and strategies to manage mom guilt and overwhelm, ensuring you stay focused and motivated. Why This Program is Perfect for Mom Founders As a mom founder myself, I understand the unique challenges you face. This program is designed to fit into your busy life, providing practical, executable steps to ensure you're ready to hit the ground running come fall. Success Stories Hear from one of my former clients, Lily Ibarra, CFO of a Fortune 500 financial services firm: "With Melissa, people will find an open forum to air their concerns and receive very clear guidance on how to prepare themselves with confidence. Know that her method really works." How to Join Ready to take your business to the next level? Here's how to get started: Visit melissallarena.com/sessions Fill out the application to ensure it's the right fit. Schedule a conversation with me this month to secure your spot. Remember, only the first five mom founders will receive the exclusive bonuses, including the 30% discount, productivity resource, two private sessions, and the podcast guest spot. Don't miss this opportunity to grow your business and make meaningful connections. Visit www.melissallarena.com/sessions and apply now! Thank you, and I look forward to helping you achieve your business goals this summer. Until next Tuesday, check the show notes for more details and links to sign up.
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233: FOMO: Working Moms vs. SAHMs - Insights from Sharon Macey, Host of the Mom to More™ Podcast
In this enlightening episode, we delve into the unique perspectives of stay-at-home moms (SAHMs) and working moms. Our special guest, Sharon Macey, host of the Mom to More™ podcast, shares her journey from being a SAHM for 20 years to reinventing herself professionally. This conversation offers working moms a chance to understand the other side of the coin and see that no matter the path chosen, there's no missing out or falling behind. This episode is perfect for you if you wish to uncover the profound wisdom that moms—both working and stay-at-home—can impart to each other to enrich their motherhood experiences. Do you want to ask me or this week's guest a question? Send in your question today: https://www.instagram.com/melissallarena/ Key Points: Understanding Different Mom Experiences: Gain insights into the stay-at-home mom experience from Sharon Macey. Learn how SAHMs navigate daily challenges and find fulfillment, providing a broader perspective that can enhance your own parenting journey. No Right or Wrong Path: Discover how both SAHMs and working moms face unique but equally valid challenges and rewards. Sharon's story highlights that choosing either path is about finding what works best for you and your family, without fear of missing out or being left behind. Shared Wisdom for a Balanced Summer: Learn practical tips from Sharon on how to make the most of your summer with your kids. Whether you're a working mom or considering a shift, this conversation provides strategies for balancing enriching activities for your children with personal growth and career aspirations. Actionable Takeaways: Embrace a new perspective by understanding the experiences of stay-at-home moms. Find reassurance in knowing that whether you work or stay home, you're making the right choice for your family. Implement shared tips to create a summer that is fulfilling and productive for both you and your kids. Join us for this insightful conversation with Sharon Macey, and discover how understanding different mom experiences can enrich your own parenting journey and help you make the most of your mom summer. Listen now and gain a fresh perspective on motherhood! Official bio: Sharon Macey is a content creator, blogger, speaker and host of the Mom to MORE podcast. A real "mother of reinvention", Sharon created Mom To MORE™, a podcast and community for women rediscovering themselves beyond motherhood. Sharon enjoyed a successful career as an award-winning copywriter and marketer before proudly embracing the role of stay-at-home-mom. During the years of raising her 3 kids, she realized while doing all of the expected mom things, she had developed a wealth of skills that served as the foundation for her own personal reinvention. Sharon knows that moms of any age can use their talents, wisdom and unique gifts to create their empowering and fulfilling next chapters in life. Sharon holds a BA in advertising from the University of Texas at Austin and a Digital Marketing Strategies certification from the Kellogg School of Management. She competes in Latin ballroom dance and lives the empty-nest life in Connecticut with her husband and comedic dog, Comet. In this episode, I shared a resource you can use today to initiate conversations with anyone! Grab it this week and let me help you take the first step to building a powerful network that can help you grow your business (and even connect with other moms too). Links: Podcast: https://apple.co/46XAhPB Website: https://www.momtomore.com/ From Contact to Connection: The Mompreneur's Go-First Networking & Follow Up Playbook Download my step by step networking and follow-up process, as well as out-of-the-box proven ways to build relationships with the busiest of influencers, prospective podcast guests, and mentors! WARNING: this is for ambitious AF moms with growing businesses. AND BONUS: 30-second elevator pitch template included! The free playbook helps you: -Write an elevator pitch that will be memorable and distinguish you from everyone else. -Improve your networking skills, especially if you're a mom founder who can't go out and leave it to chance that she'll meet the business investor, mentor, or partner of her dreams. -Learn how to become a better networker without feeling like a fish out of water. -Write your emails to introduce yourself to strangers without overthinking how to begin an email or how to prove in the email that speaking with you will be worth their time. -Push beyond the fear that often holds you back, thinking "Oh, I can't do that" or "Who am I to approach that person?" -Think strategically about your outreach goals by considering why you want to talk to specific people, along with what you need to know so you don't get caught out there feeling like a deer in headlights without the right words to say. -Think ahead about how you intend to make it worth their time and how you can use your platform to feature them as an expert, among other things. -Calm your networking jitters beforehand by guiding you on how to research the event and its attendees before heading out. -Gain fresh ideas for follow-ups that will feel good to you and the recipient, instead of just emailing the person over and over again. -Use a timeframe to conduct your networking or outreach efforts so they become a habit. -And includes email templates galore! Meanwhile, this episode is brought to you by the Fertile Imagination to Networking Success for Mom Founders Program: A LIVE 9-week group coaching masterclass to fast-track making connections with the right people to take your business to the next level. What's included in this program: 9 weeks of live networking coaching and community Value-packed on demand curriculum on everything from navigating impostor syndrome to who to network with, how to find them, what to say, and on planning your fall and winter 2024 networking calendar focused on your business growth goal. 3 hours/ weekly investment this summer (2 whenever or wherever you wish) to hit the ground running in the fall and feel ahead for a change Lifetime access to tools and resources built for mom founders including meditations and unexpected ways to let go of mom guilt and overwhelm Exclusive opportunity for the first five mom founder participants including a multimedia podcast guest feature, two private bonus sessions, and a 30% discounted investment Special extras: Daily Wins Workbook, Impostor Syndrome Journaling, and Networking Email Templates and More I'm also offering exclusive bonuses for the first five mom founders only which is a guide on how to boost your productivity as a solopreneur so you can easily fit this into your summer calendar, two private one-on-one (to implement networking outreach, to role-play your elevator pitch), and a 30% discount. Where do you want to be 9-weeks from now? There are two options you can feel excited, intentional, and prepared to hit the ground running in the fall ready to pitch, connect, or partner with absolutely anyone who can help your business skyrocket into next year or you can play smaller, stay stuck in the same day-to-day monotony of business hiding from the people and places where the better opportunities can be created? You are bold. You are the type of founder who will do anything for your clients! It's time to do this for yourself! Treat yourself the same you have committed to treat others. Go for option 1. Bold you! Believe in yourself as much as you believe in others! Imagine if you believed in yourself as much as you believed in your kids! You'd knock yourself out of every and any park! The fastest way to get to option 1 is by investing in Fertile Imagination to Networking Success today. Sign-up now for the 15-minute call for the details and summer start date--> https://www.melissallarena.com/sessions/ Let's talk here so that you won't miss out on all of the bonus exclusive to this round of five mom founders. If you have questions email me melissa [at] melissallarena.com TRANSCRIPT: What if stay at home moms and working moms got together and helped one another and imparted some really useful wisdom that could help us each be better moms? That is what this conversation is about. I have here quite the special guest, Sharon Macey. She's the host of the Mom to More™ podcast. She's the mother of reinvention. Former stay at home mom for almost 20 years, Sharon intimately understands the journey of motherhood, its joys, challenges, and the inevitable question moms all ask themselves. Is this all there is? And what's next for me? These moments of introspection led Sharon to her own aha moment and inspired the creation of her podcast, a podcast and community dedicated to supporting women rediscovering themselves after motherhood. In this episode, we'll Sharon and I talk about what is it that we should be doing and can be doing with our kids during these summer breaks. And so I thought that Sharon would have a wonderful perspective seeing that she had about 20 summers with her children as a stay at home mom. And I think asking a friend with that experience is absolutely invaluable. Also discussed in this conversation was a chapter of my book, fertile imagination. So in my book, I share how as working moms, we might want to phase out our approach to business building. Or just the way that we tackle our goals. And so I wanted to get Sharon's perspective pertaining to her life as a stay at home mom for the last 20 years. And I wanted to see kind of like the other side of things. I wanted to know if she had been building out her interests in phases as a stay at home mom. And so that was something that we talked about as well as this very unique and very cool concept, which is that She was plugged into the community of advertising as a stay at home mom, so although she may have not been, you know, working for an agency at the time, her mom friends in agencies and friends in general would still reach out to Sharon. As she may have been, you know, driving a child from hockey practice to back home. And that continuation of building those relationships, even when you are not working, per se, or looking for a job, I thought is such a wonderful example to share on this episode. So truly enjoy the conversation. If this really adds value and helps you reimagine what this summer could look like, having spent some valuable time with your kids, but also still plugged into your interests, then share this conversation with your mom bestie in particular. And I want to challenge you. If you're a working mom, share this with a stay at home mom. And if you're a stay at home mom, share it with a working mom. I promise that we have more in common than we could possibly imagine. So please share this episode. And now for the wonderful conversation with Sharon Macey. Amazing. Sharon Macey, thank you so much for being on Unimaginable Wellness. How are you? I am great. My friend. How are you? I'm really excited about this. I'm really excited about you. I'm excited that you're in a library. Oh my gosh. Do you know internet problems today? So we're in a library with this heinous yellow background behind me. So But you know what, Sharon, this is emblematic of making it all work, making what lemon sorbet out of lemons. Here's the best part. I love libraries. So you're actually in like my Haven, right? So your library, fun fact, when I was living in new Canaan, we were very library envious. of people in Westport, right? And so you are in a really great library looking at what a river or something. So yes, yeah. Overlooking I'm not overlooking a river, but yes, this library is overlooking a river. Yeah. So shout out to libraries. You guys are saving graces, especially if the internet ever conks out. And, and also for those mom friendly rooms, right? With all those beautiful children books and such. So Sharon, I am so excited to have you here and we can absolutely launch into the regularly scheduled conversation. So Sharon, let me just paint the picture here, right? So. A lot of us want to spend more time with our kids, especially when we're in school break during the summer. But the, the challenge is if we have our own businesses, if we're working moms, is that at this point we already feel behind, like behind on life, behind on our to dos, on our dreams. And so this idea that, okay, kids are out and we want to spend time with them. It just feels Card, and it feels like something that might take us away from building the skills necessary to like make progress on our business. So I would love you to help us all better understand how time spent with kids. For example, maybe thinking about your years as a stay at home mom, 20 years or so, how did that better prepare you? For when it was your turn or time to launch your own platform or business, like help us rationalize, like, okay. Time spent with my kid is going to help me for when I'm back at it in the fall. 100%. I love that question, Melissa. Thank you. The beauty of having been a stay at home mom, at least for me, and I realize that is a privilege to be able to spend that time, is that I realized later that everything you do as a stay at home mom builds a skill set and Or superpowers, whatever you want to call it, that will help you manifest, create, be whatever it is you want to be in your future. Or if you are trying to get this done while your kids are, maybe your kids have finally entered kindergarten or elementary school and you do have a little more time. In your day, you've got more daylight, it will help you build those skills. And so every moment that you're with your kids, you're learning so many things and we blow these off, right? You think about how you act in an emergency, the leadership roles, the, the infinite questions in your ability to multitask and be a communicator and a negotiator and we'll throw in Dr. Mom, cause we've all been there. You have these innate abilities to do so many things and all of those skills are going to inform you. They will help you get to whatever your next chapter or what I like to call my podcast, your more is going to be. And so I, I, I sort of challenged moms to say, think about all the things that you do, write them down. I mean, think about all the parties you've done. You're an event planner. Think about nonprofits that you've raised money for. You are developing a skill set that is rich and varied and marketable, and those will take you far. I have to share something with you. A lot of moms that I've partnered with, mom founders, have told me that following up after going to networking events tends to be hard, awkward, and a lot of them really don't know how to do it. I completely agree, and I think, as I think about time with my child or my children, I also think about the fact, and what I'm hearing you say, Sharon, is that I could almost, like, reframe it, right? If, if I'm feeling that, That complexity of the decision, the fact that it is time that I'm not going to be working on my business, quote unquote. So one reframe that I'm hearing is that maybe the summer season, maybe these breaks, quote unquote, are like opportunities for me to work on like my soft Skills, right? So soft skills as a leader is certainly something that if you're a business owner, like a solopreneur, like myself, like you tend to forget the fact that you too need like a development plan as well in terms of your leadership skills. So maybe time with your child can be time spent focusing on some key soft skills, and maybe it's something you do together. A hundred percent. And this, I think this time with the kids, summer is fun. It's creative. It's imaginative. It is, it's sort of where you can try to give your brain a bit of a mental break because the kids are on break and listen, your kid may go to camp. So you'll have a little more time there. Just, I'd say really enjoy that time. And, and drill down on all of these life experiences and see what comes up from there because it's not wasted time at all. It's incredibly valuable time. Absolutely. And, and I mentioned that because I remember when I was coaching a client, she had spent one morning going to some sort of science museum with her son and her husband, and in the back of her mind, she was like, But I should be really working on building my business. But then she got back to the whole point of like, but wait, like, why did I actually build my business? It was to have the flexibility to be with my child. And so I think all of it can be rationalized. If you need that rationalization, just so that this way you feel great and actually present when you are with your child. So I love what you said there, Sharon. So let me, let me ask you something because here's the thing that's super cool. So when I've interviewed people, not everyone has like checked out my book, fertile imagination, but you have it in your hand. And so I think it's, it's amazing. So I want to just reference it and get your thoughts on this idea. Yeah in the book In the book Thank you so much In the book sharon. I reference a working mom who I admire so so so much martha hennessey who's Like a rock star and she's like a grandmother at this stage, too And she told me before I became a mom that I would never regret the time I spent with my kids It was really hard to think about Think that through because I was not yet a mom, but now I like I get it, right? Cause a lot of us, for example, especially if you're a working mom, you only have these like windows of time, right? Of mom exclusive time. So here's my question, Martha, I mentioned in my book, she worked on her professional dreams. In phases while being a mom, right? And so my question to you, because you were a stay at home mom for 20 years, like, did you, on the other side of this coin, explore your interests in phases during your stay at home mom time? Ooh, interesting question, my friend. So I didn't think that I did at the time, but in retrospect, I I absolutely did, because I realized everything I was doing with my kids, all of the information I was absorbing and the knowledge that I was learning and the skills that I was honing, all of those things helped me eventually get to where I am right now with mom to more with the podcast and the community for women rediscovering themselves beyond motherhood. And what was interesting, Melissa was when I was a stay at home mom, it was a little more black and white then. Right. I've got a, got a couple of years on you. It was a little more black and white, and it was either you were working or you are not. And I had some freelance clients. My background is advertising and marketing. I'm a writer. So I did have some freelance clients for a while until I had too many kids and then they outnumbered me and I was overwhelmed, but. What I, what I tried to do is keep my fingers in the things that I like to do. I, my friends know that I'm creative. I would have friends who were working, who would call me up and say, need a headline. I need an idea. Talk to me about whatever. And so during those years, as I had in the back of my head, I knew that There was a lot of questioning inside of me going, well, is this all there is? And what do I want to do when my kids grow up, which definitely led me into my mom to more chapter. And then during the pandemic, I was able to go back to school, which really helped to launch a couple of things, which then ultimately led in into what I was doing. So I. Definitely different phases, although I might not have been as aware of it at the moment when things were happening, but in retrospect, when you really look at that pool of experiences and knowledge and highs and lows and disasters and successes, everything sort of helped me to get to where I am right now. It's so interesting how originally I'm gonna this is actually something I've never told anyone. So like, I remember when I was first pregnant, me and my husband, okay, this was before becoming parents. Well, I guess I was with my first born in me, but I remember. We got all analytical about what we wanted our firstborn to be. We literally started writing down, like, we want them to know all these languages. We want them to be, pick a word, kind, ambitious, whatever. Like we were almost like scientifically writing out like the recipe that we wanted to then bake. And, and so it's interesting because obviously that was like, To shreds because reality, you become a mom, but what I'm hearing from you is that maybe we don't need to be so like, I don't know, methodological about how we want to approach our lives. Maybe things will happen. Events will happen. Situations will present themselves that in hindsight, we can then connect the dots and make something out of them that. Helps us feel fulfilled, you know, and so again, we were not creating our child, but we're manifesting his personality. So this was, this was beyond manifesting. We're like two MBAs. We got Excel on this whole thing. And, and honestly, I had no time for Excel that first year. But the whole idea is that there's, there might be something else at play that really just helps guide us in, in a logical way that we will only know after the fact, right? So 20 years later, it makes sense that your friends in the creative feels, we're still asking you for your insights and wisdom. It makes sense that maybe now at this stage, Sharon, and I don't know if this is true. Maybe you also like reached out to them and ask them about your mom to more stage. Maybe there's, there's some sort of, right. Exchange there. So how did that work? Like at this point, at this stage, I'm just curious, like, did you plug back into those former friends, former colleagues, people who knew you when? Absolutely. And, and a lot of that, they've just been in my life. Throughout the continuum, right? They never left. And I feel blessed to know as many people as I do in as many different stages of life that they're in. And so knowing that I have people that I can connect Reach out to and connect with, or sometimes reconnect with, has been incredibly powerful. And I've found moms from my podcast, from, from knowing, from people that I've known for a long time and realizing things that they have done in their life. And I think also you have to, like in your book, Melissa, you have to allow for those moments of creativity and those moments of imagination and those moments of, I'm just going to go with the flow and see where it takes me. And. Oftentimes, when you have these unexpected moments that were unex, these unexpected moments, you learn so much about you, about something that you love to do, about something that you think you might want to look into in the future. So I just say, Like what you said in the book, allow your imagination to be and be able to take chances. And I, and I think that's also something that I'm, I'm actually really comfortable doing. I don't know why, but I'm cool with taking chances. I feel like I started the podcast before I was really ready, although I had done a lot of research and I was as ready as I was going to be at that moment. But was it perfect? God, no, you just, sometimes you just jump in and you do something because you know that you have something that needs to get out and it's going to resonate and you just need to do it. So that's kind of sort of where I'm, I'm coming from about that. Yeah. And I love that. I love that. I love how there was this continuing this continuity, I guess you could say of relationships. It's like, I noticed that in terms of circles. So like, you know, where I have lived and where I live now, like there's a lot of moms who might not be a purist. Stay at home mom because right now I would say the lines are blurry to your point Especially with the advent of hybrid work and just working from home It's like like I do everything at home But so does my husband which is really interesting and he's not a stay at home dad, right? So I I love how you Stayed connected to people that were still in the work of of commerce right at the time and how and I also love how they respect you so much for your talent and skills, even though maybe at that moment, you may have been literally like driving someone to hockey practice or something. Right? Like, And yes, yeah, absolutely. Absolutely. Right. You know, for mom, some, sometimes some of your most creative ideas happen behind the wheel of your car. Yeah, that's, that's very true. Actually, Sarah Blakely, by the way, just today on Instagram did a reel on how she used to feel. Fake a commute so that she could come up with her best ideas while driving nowhere, like around the same sort of set of blocks in Georgia. But that being said, it just supports what you just said, Sharon. Yeah. Driving, showering, all of these moments where you're not thinking about a campaign or whatever, where that is when you get the tagline, right? That's when you get that soundbite. So I love that. I'm super creative. It just moments of when you're sort of like falling asleep or maybe you wake up in the middle of the night because at a certain age, yes, everybody's waking up in the middle of the night and oftentimes I find my brain just starts going and ideas just start popping and I have to open up my phone so I could just jot myself a note so I don't forget it. Absolutely. Yeah. I mean, that's actually when my imagination was in full gear, like when I would put my head to the pillow and when I became a mom, because I was not putting my head to the pillow very often, that's why I felt like there was this pause on my imagination. And that's why I wrote the book so that I could rediscover my imagination and, and help moms and readers do the same for them. And, and so let me ask you this question, cause I think I think this is really going to be common in terms of a lot of the listeners here. And I think your perspective, Sharon, would be amazing. So, okay, we have this idea that we are missing out on the lives of our kids. And And I, I am, I wonder from your perspective, when you were a stay at home, mom, did you feel like you were missing out in the world of commerce? Like, was that ever like an inner conflict for you? Like, Oh, I'm not in the glitz and glamour of that. Things I heard this from a mom. That's a stay at home mom who was in, in communications before. That's why I'm curious about your thoughts and how you either untangled that conflict or worked through that conflict. Cause we have it on the other side. We feel like we're missing out on the lives of our kids working mom. So I'm just curious your thoughts. Yeah, it's really interesting. You mentioned that because I absolutely felt that I was missing out, but. At that moment in my life, I had my it was a joint decision with my husband and myself that I had decided to step back and focus on the kids because they were only young ones and also recognizing that I had the privilege of being a stay at home mom. But I would advise. Moms who are home to stay connected. And it's so much easier now than when my kids were younger, right? Having come back from, you know, the mom 2. 0 summit, so many women are really engaged in a, in a part time way. They've got younger kids, they're content creators that didn't exist when, when my kids were younger. And so I'd say. My advice would be stay connected to the things that you love, the things that resonate with you, anything in your form or career, stay in touch with the people that you worked with. You can take an online class, you can meet up with other like minded moms, and I know that there are, are groups all over the country of women who, Our home who are gathering together and they're talking about how do they stay relevant? How do they stay informed? How do they stay with their fingers sort of still in the pie of their former careers? So then when they have the opportunity to be able to go back to what they did or interestingly, maybe start something totally new that they had no idea that they were going to do, that they feel that there was still that connection. I'd say for the moms who are working and they're feeling like they're missing out with their kids, that, that is, is maybe not PC. That's, that's obviously a choice that you have. Now, I will also say, That there are women who have to work and I respect the hell out of them for doing two really incredibly hard jobs at the same time, raising kids, having to make that decision to put them in daycare or have someone in the family look at them so you can go make a living. And that is, that is an incredibly hard journey. And I applaud all those moms who do that. And. And so they're not missing out because it's really interesting. Melissa, from the kids perspective, my kids would say to me, we can't imagine having a mom who wasn't at home. But I know other women who were working and their kids have said to them, we can't imagine having a mom who wasn't working. And so kids will glean. Information and and experiences from how they lived and that will inform I think who they're going to become. So I think both sides of the coin are valid and true and real and they happen every day. And I think we just really have to embrace where we are able to be at this moment in time while we are embracing our kids and just trying to take every moment that we gain from them and grow from it and love it. I would agree. And I think, as I think about some of the clients that I've had who, who technically have a choice, that's, that's the part that's kind of interesting. And everybody has to decide for themselves, like what it is that they want out of their one precious life. Right. But, but some of the, uh, Some of the individuals who do have a lot of choice and, and opt to be very ambitious in terms of their careers, even when their kids are only going to be five, one time or 10, one time there's the other side of it is that you poured in so many years, a lot of times before becoming a mom, right? So there's so many people that I've gone to school. School with, for example, that before they became a mom, which a lot of people now become moms later in life, they poured in decades to go up the ladder and to accomplish whatever dream was on their heart. And so it's very, very valid that that dream doesn't just go and it doesn't get thrown in the toilet with our placentas. Again, I wonder where my placenta is. It's all. And it's really interesting, Melissa. I was just speaking with a cousin, a cousin of mine, and it's actually my cousin's daughter, and she just had a baby last fall. She's got a really big time job. And I think the pandemic really changed a lot of things. She is able to work from home two days a week. And so she can be with her daughter. She can work, she can take time out and, and. And have that mommy time, which is so important, but she also has this like really big job at a really world renowned firm. And so I think moms today have so many more options, so many more options than what I had when my kids were younger. And so I, I think that's really important. I think that's terrific. You can sort of do both, right? You can have the time with your kids. You can have time at work. Sometimes they're overlapping at home. And, and it's just a whole different world in that regard, whether who's going to be a home parent, working parent. It's, it's, it's, there's a lot of, you know, We may want to edit this out right here. Cause I just had a senior moment. There are, there is much more optionality that exists today than exists before. Absolutely. Sharon. I think that people definitely can re imagine what. A day can look like where they are present with their child, and they're also super focused on their work during another slice of, of the day. I, I do, I do know there's, it's such a complex thing. I think having been a coach, like I appreciate also a lot of the realities, which is just one thing. Like. I still do think even though we have the option to work from home, I still do think that people that are physically based in a headquarters area might get picked for a C suite job a little more readily and easily. Or if you show up to the office, it might convey extra commitment. And I'm not saying that's right. I'm just saying that I understand. And I appreciate the reality you. But I also understand that anyone that's listening has the opportunity at this time to really figure out for herself what she wants. Like, what do you want out of this life experience? Some, some listeners may. May have always thought to themselves, like, I've always wanted to be a mom. Like, like this, this being the CEO of an organization, that's for the birds. I'm being so silly right now, but like not everyone wanted that. And so for some people, I think it's just a matter of seeing the fact that if your dream was. To be a stay at home mom and you have the opportunity to do so that is as valid and worthy and honorable as being the CEO of a billion dollar organization or whatever. And yeah, I mean, you're representing the next generation of humans and I think the world is definitely more amenable to the whole work from home concept and we'll, we can thank the pandemic for that really. And. There are, I think you can have more of it both ways than we could in the past. And, and the other thing that's really interesting, Melissa is what I've learned from some of the women that I've had the privilege of interviewing for my podcast is that I find that women who have spent a period of time home with their kids, they, they have become. Far more entrepreneurial than they would have ever imagined. And so if you had said to many of the moms that I've spoken with, if someone had told you five years ago that you're gonna be doing what you're doing at this moment, they would have said, no way, would have said, that's not me. I'm never gonna be doing that. And so I think that just, The experience that you gain as a mom, the experience that you gained from working first and then being a mom and taking all those things that you went sort of putting it in the washer and the dryer and saying, okay, how's it going to come out on the other end? There's women have really this extraordinary entrepreneurial spirit and creativity and imagination, which leads them places they never thought they'd go. And, and that, I mean, that's what happened to me. And I think that is just beautiful because life. Is you never know what's going to happen in life. You never know what's going to happen tomorrow. So to be able to take that creativity and move it forward, I think is a real gift and a blessing to, to have that opportunity. Absolutely. Sharon, thank you for this. I think anyone listening is going to want to keep up with you. Keep up with Sharon. So like, where can we, yeah. So where can people find you hear more for about being a mom and, and just. Living in that moreness, like, how can we be part of your world? I love that. Living in my moreness. Thank you for that. You can find me, well, my website is MOM2MORE, so M O M T O M O R E dot com, and on there, You'll have links to the podcast. The podcast is mom to more. It is on Apple, Spotify, YouTube for the video cast, really, wherever you do your podcast, you can find me. And on Instagram, I am at mom to more also on Facebook, also on LinkedIn. I'm at Sharon Macey and talking about all things just from a slightly different perspective on LinkedIn that are relevant to, to moms. So I think also what's interesting for moms is. Using your creative flow and, and, and having that idea exchange continuing on in your life, whether it's with friends who are moms, friends who are working, but that that whole sort of your creative flow, your essence, exchanging of ideas, building bridges, and, and it's something that I think is, is helpful in helping you just sort of try to figure out what your next chapter is going to be. Absolutely. Thank you so much, Sharon. Have an awesome one. Thank you, Melissa. Thanks. This has been great fun. What a wonderful conversation with Sharon. Here are the three things that I am going to reflect on myself and you might want to consider as well. So that this way, this summer season is A present one, and it feels completely nourishing, whether you are a stay at home mom or you're a working mom. Point number one, there is beauty in being a stay at home mom. There are skills that you will learn that you can absolutely use now and later. And so just appreciating the beauty that there is, is my personal to do. I mean, there are moments when I am definitely very focused on my three boys, especially the summer season. When I might lose sight of the fact that, you know what, we're out here having frozen yogurt together. How often is this going to happen? I don't know the answer to that. And so appreciating the moment and being in the beauty is absolutely something that I will take to heart. The second point is phases. So in my book, fertile imagination, Martha Hennessy is someone who I feature. She's outstanding, had various positions in the government, and she is actually someone that I admire in terms of phasing out her professional ambitions. Sharon mentioned how moms stay at home. Moms can do the same thing. You can do the same thing. If you are on a career pause, you can absolutely Think about what is interesting to you and start exploring this in a very like phase by phase basis. So if your children are, you know, just starting school, you could absolutely approach your love of dance. If your children are now in middle school, you can absolutely approach your love of song, whatever it is that's on your heart. You can absolutely Think about how to experience that interest and Definitely check out my book because there's some ideas there pertaining to how you might want to Reimagine how you actually explore an interest so check out fertile imagination Third point. So this relationship between stay at home moms and working moms, I want more stay at home mom friends. I want more working mom friends. I want us to get together and talk about the reality of our life experiences. There's so much more that we can learn from each other. than there is in terms of judging each other or even like judging ourselves. You know, I know for me, there have been moments when I've been like, okay, wait, was I supposed to be a stay at home mom? Or was I supposed to be a, you know, working girl out in corporate America? Like there's all these thoughts that we often share, but we do not to one another about. So we share it in terms of we're thinking it. But we're not expressing it. So what if we actually got together over a cup of coffee and we actually had these conversations? So definitely thank you so much for listening to the conversation and until n
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232: I said I would spend more time with my kids this summer
In this episode, I'm here to help you tackle the challenge many mom entrepreneurs face: balancing business growth with family time during the summer break. I'll share practical strategies to maintain momentum in your business while spending quality time with your kids. Drawing from my experience and my signature three-step method, you'll learn actionable advice on leveraging the summer months to refine your company vision, boost energy levels, and enhance storytelling skills. By involving your children in these activities, you not only strengthen your bond but also tap into their imaginative perspectives. Together, let's ensure you feel empowered and supported as you navigate your entrepreneurial journey. Today's episode is my answer to this listener question below. Q&A: It's time for growth in my business. This fall I plan to hit the ground running. I know I will have to network more to take my business to the next level but I feel rusty and fear coming across as inept. What are some things I can focus on this summer while respecting that I also said I want to spend more time with my kids during this break? Do you have a question? Send in your mom founder question today: https://www.instagram.com/melissallarena/ Key Points: Summer Challenges for Mom Entrepreneurs: Balancing business growth with family time during the summer break can be tough, but I'm here to help you navigate it. The Imagination to Impact to Income Method: Let's dive into my three-step method tailored for mom entrepreneurs: accessing a fertile imagination, making impactful decisions, and creating pathways to income. Practical Strategies for Summer Success: Revamp Your Company Vision: Involve your kids in reimagining your company vision, leveraging their fresh perspectives and creativity. Boost Energy Levels: Focus on essential self-care practices like nutrition, movement, and emotional well-being to increase productivity and capacity. Enhance Storytelling Skills: Practice storytelling with your kids to refine your communication and articulate your business narrative effectively. Networking and Confidence Building: These summer activities contribute to enhancing your networking skills and boosting confidence in business interactions. Opportunity for Growth: Consider joining my group coaching program, "Fertile Imagination to Networking Success for Mom Founders," where you'll find support, mentorship, and a community of like-minded mom entrepreneurs like yourself. As you navigate the summer months, seize the opportunity to invest in your personal and professional growth. By implementing these strategies and participating in my coaching program, you'll be equipped to tackle the challenges of entrepreneurship with confidence and purpose, achieving success while cherishing precious family moments. This episode is brought to you by the Fertile Imagination to Networking Success for Mom Founders Program: A LIVE 9-week group coaching masterclass to fast-track making connections with the right people to take your business to the next level. What's included in this program: 9 weeks of live networking coaching and community Value-packed on demand curriculum on everything from navigating impostor syndrome to who to network with, how to find them, what to say, and on planning your fall and winter 2024 networking calendar focused on your business growth goal. 3 hours/ weekly investment this summer (2 whenever or wherever you wish) to hit the ground running in the fall and feel ahead for a change Lifetime access to tools and resources built for mom founders including meditations and unexpected ways to let go of mom guilt and overwhelm Exclusive opportunity for the first five mom founder participants including a multimedia podcast guest feature, two private bonus sessions, and a 30% discounted investment Special extras: Daily Wins Workbook, Impostor Syndrome Journaling, and Networking Email Templates and More I'm also offering exclusive bonuses for the first five mom founders only which is a guide on how to boost your productivity as a solopreneur so you can easily fit this into your summer calendar, two private one-on-one (to implement networking outreach, to role-play your elevator pitch), and a 30% discount. Where do you want to be 9-weeks from now? There are two options you can feel excited, intentional, and prepared to hit the ground running in the fall ready to pitch, connect, or partner with absolutely anyone who can help your business skyrocket into next year or you can play smaller, stay stuck in the same day-to-day monotony of business hiding from the people and places where the better opportunities can be created? You are bold. You are the type of founder who will do anything for your clients! It's time to do this for yourself! Treat yourself the same you have committed to treat others. Go for option 1. Bold you! Believe in yourself as much as you believe in others! Imagine if you believed in yourself as much as you believed in your kids! You'd knock yourself out of every and any park! The fastest way to get to option 1 is by investing in Fertile Imagination to Networking Success today. Sign-up now for the 15-minute call for the details and summer start date--> https://go.oncehub.com/ClientSessionMelissaLlarena Let's talk here so that you won't miss out on all of the bonus exclusive to this round of five mom founders. If you have questions email me melissa [at] melissallarena.com TRANSCRIPT: Three things you can do this summer that are going to help you feel like you're ahead of the game come this fall. This is a question I got from a listener. She says, it's time for growth in my business. And this fall, I plan to hit the ground running. Now, I know I'm gonna have to network more in order to take my business to the next level, but I feel rusty and honestly, sometimes I'm scared that I'm gonna come across as inept. So what are the things that I can focus on this summer as a business owner? While respecting the fact that I also said that I want to spend more time with my kids. Okay. I love this question. And if you have your own questions, absolutely send it over. I'm on Instagram at Melissa Lorena. I love this question because it comes up every single break, whether it is a winter, spring, or a school break of any kind, anywhere you are in the world, this is something that is uniquely a challenge for the primary caregivers of their children or family members who might be aging. And I want to be sure that you have. All the tools you need this summer in order to feel supported and to know that there are things that you absolutely can do in order to make progress on your business. So I wanted to just share this idea with you. A recent client who participated in my group coaching program, fertile imagination to networking success for mom founders, Michelle. She actually pointed something out pertaining to what is the point of differentiation of partnering with me versus someone that doesn't acknowledge the fact that you are a mom first. Here's what Michelle had to say. She said, it made me feel, the program that is, as if I wasn't always failing. I wasn't always failing. Um, having to feel disappointed when things were not going my way or when things were not the way I imagined or hoped. So in the program, Michelle goes on to say that there was so much context around this idea that as long as you are moving. Towards your dreams, even if it's at a snail's pace, you are doing what you can, and that's more than enough. So here's the thing. During the summer months, our schedules completely change for a lot of us. And we have to reprioritize what comes first, but here's something that I know personally and I also know having helped a lot of mom founders who have very different circumstances. If you decide not to do anything pertaining to making progress on your business, then there are absolutely consequences. And here's some of them. Come September, when all of our peers are out there full force, marketing their programs, marketing their podcasts, marketing their offers, we often will feel left behind. Like we are way behind the eight ball come September. And what then happens is this pattern. You end up doing. Everything that you should have been doing little by little over the summer in the beginning of the fall, in September. And so that is what then brings about burnout. That is then what brings about this idea that our business and motherhood is an all or nothing game. It's something that either you're all in, Or you're fully out of, and I want to really, really emphasize that it does not have to be the case. There are absolutely things that you can do this summer that are gentle, that are purposeful, that are intentional, that will keep the ball rolling in your business. And I really, really encourage you to think through. What you want to feel in September once the kids do go back to school once the kids are back in their Regular routine and you have a bit more time to yourself to think so something else that is a consequence of not doing anything that is strategic and quite Intentional over the summer that is going to give you the biggest bang for your time Buck is this idea that It is going to be so important, irrespective of where you are as a mom to really, really keep your kids engaged over the summer. I know, right? I heard you from the left field. So here's why that matters. As it relates to our children during these summer months and at any point, they are what I like to call imagination experts in residence. Thanks. And we lose sight, oftentimes, that a day spent with them can actually help us gain access to our own imagination. A day spent with them playing around can help us feel fresh, give us the opportunity to think differently about things, give us this sense of fresh enthusiasm that plugs us back into why we started our business in the first place. For And so you will be missing out on this opportunity that's quite special during the summer to hang out with the kids and actually learn from them over the summer, see how they might consider certain challenges and approach certain things, right? So that's something else that if you decide to completely let go of your business over the summer, you might miss out the opportunity to bring that fresh sense of enthusiasm, fresh perspective, a fresh playfulness. To something that you've been struggling with or thinking about in the year before while the kids were in school, like now you have these amazing humans that are around you who can help you rethink, reimagine what's possible for you in your life and in your business. So why not leverage that unique time during the summer to bring them on board your own sort of team, right? So that's something else that you will miss out on if you decide to not do anything business related over the summer versus figure out a way to bring your kids into the loop. Here's something else that tends to happen. So we get rusty. That listener mentioned that her networking skills are already rusty. So now imagine a summer spent where you are at home or you are on vacation and you are a hundred percent not in a business mindset and not using that way of thinking. What ends up happening is that you're going to have to warm yourself up come the fall and you're going to be warming yourself up come the fall when everyone else is. Would have already been warmed up throughout the entire summer season. And this is not to say at all that you don't get to decompress, relax, not think about business. But what this is to say is that there are huge benefits for making progress on your business, even at a snail's pace. And I would argue that that is the reason why over the last 12 years as a mom founder with three children, I have been able to do some pretty kick ass things, such as bringing amazing guests to my podcast, like Suzy Batiste, Beth Comstock, I mean, amazing humans, and it's because I never really fell asleep, like a comatose on my business, never, never, never, even when I was tandem nursing, my identical twins, I've I continued to make progress and again, we're not talking about rockstar progress. We're talking about snails pace, but snails pace might be the way that you achieve your big bold ambition. All right. So now let me share with you three things that you can do this summer that are not going to put you in a place of conflict. Where you're going to be telling yourself, but I promised that I was going to be spending more time with my kids, and then of course I also promised myself that I would hit the ground running come September. That is the conflict that I want us to really nip in the bud right now on this episode. Okay, so here's where we will begin. I want to share with you my framework. This is the framework that I teach my participants in my group coaching program. And this framework really comes from experience and having partnered and worked with so many working moms just like you. It is called the imagination to impact to income method. So three step method for mom, business owners. Here's why this method works for a mom founder, and it is specific for someone. Okay, so the first step of the method is about having access to a fertile imagination. That is also the title of my book, my bestseller. The reason why this is critical and key and cannot be skipped for a mom business owner Is because oftentimes we find ourselves in the most complicated and gnarly experiences and we need to figure out how to keep going, whether it is figure out who's going to pick up Jake versus who's going to pick up Mary or figure out how we're going to stay, stay in terms of And the best, keep our best foot forward when we are exhausted and we're trying to complete our launch marketing plan, whatever challenge you have as a mom, if you do not have access to your fertile imagination, you are limping your way through business and life. What this means is if you do not have the ability to think expansively beyond what you may have seen another mom. Ever do as a business owner or as a matriarch of her family, then you are greatly limited because modern society comes to you at a fast rate and thinking expansively and beyond what you have seen is the name of the game when it comes to maintaining your mental health and still kicking ass in business and being an amazing mom. So that is step one to. Everything and anything that I teach my clients who are mom founders who want to find business success on their terms, on their timeline and alongside their kids. Now that's step one. Step two is impact. So at the end of the day, a lot of us go into a lot of things and we end up feeling scatter brained. This is impossible to actually make your maximum impact. So once you have access to unlock these fresh ideas, because now you have access to your fertile imagination, which is step one of the three step method, it is then that you can choose from all those ideas, the one idea you're going to go all in on. Okay. After you have decided to go all in on that one idea, That is when we could start talking about step three, which is what are the possible roads to income for you on your terms as a mom founder and the pathways to income have everything to do with the things that are within your control, the things, the skills that you need to get very good at, including storytelling, including networking, including productivity. I mean, there's a plethora of skills that I do teach my clients. But then on top of that, there's also this ability and desire to communicate your story and communicate why you are the person to actually help someone else solve their challenge, right? So as a business owner, that is why we opened up our business, our businesses in order to solve challenges. So this three step method, I https: otter. ai into precisely what it would look like to begin this three step method alongside your kids during this summer, and in a way where you do not feel like you are robbing time from your kids, nor robbing time from your business. So, let's get to it. So before we get to the nuances here, overall, the reason why my three step method works for mom founders is because oftentimes we have gears that are just stuck in our minds, right? And so again, we're starting with the imagination, so we have to unlock the ability to come up with fresh solutions, fresh ideas. Then we're filtering, we're going from scatterbrained to focused by having one thing that we're going to focus on. And ultimately that is what's going to help you save time and money. And so now let's go back and see what that looks like for a summer well spent that you absolutely are proud of and excited about come the fall when you're ready to run fast towards your goal. So, this idea of a fertile imagination. Step one, as I said, you have got to turn on your fertile imagination. Here's how you know that your imagination is dead, is in a coma. Well, let's imagine that you have the same challenge this summer as you had last summer and you don't have a new solution. That is how you know that your fertile imagination is turned off. So we've got to be sure that that's step one. Our kids are the best human beings. to help us turn on our fertile imagination. Think about it this way, right? Our kids, they clock in about 10, 000 hours of using their imagination when they're little. Imagine having access to an expert who has clocked in those 10, 000 hours and is not shy about sharing what is in their imagination, right? All right. So here are the three things you can work on with your kids that are related to your business over the summer and not feel guilty about doing so either. First thing, and this is something that I have worked on with my clients in my group coaching program, and I have invited them to actually bring their kids along for the ride. So point, the first point, you can work on your company vision with your kids. So let's imagine you've been in business for six years, for 12 years. For more than one year, chances are your company vision might not be pulling its weight. Your company vision has got to be re imagined with more expansive thinking. Your company vision needs to energize you. Why is that? Because moms, we have finite energy. So we need all of the. Energy levers we can get right in order to keep going. So over this summer, what I would encourage you to think about is your company vision. Your company vision is not a one pager business plan. It's not what you might have on your pitch deck and share with your investors. A company vision is deeply personal. It should be visual and it's okay if it is totally unreasonable. I actually encourage you to make it unreasonable. Thank you. And who's often unreasonable? Our children are often unreasonable. That is why I would invite you to actually, age appropriate, speak with your kids and work on your company vision together. Have them present some dares to you. Have them stretch how you think about what's possible as a business owner. Have them Encourage you to simplify your language pertaining to what makes your business different. So I'm a hundred percent sure you have not thought about this. The reason why I have thought about this is because there's a lot that we say we can't do because we have kids. And I want to flip the script on things that we can do and we could probably do better because we have access to these imagination experts in residence over the summer. So working on your company vision, that is where it's at. And I remember when I was partnering with Michelle, she has an organization that's a nonprofit. And in terms of the work that they do, it's something that you wouldn't imagine talking about with your children. It's about NICU stays, pregnancy, and the loss of children. But even in that scenario, there's a way for you to share your story with your child. And there's a way. For you to really refine your messaging and have them help you focus or hone in on one point of differentiation, where it feels like a good experience. It feels like a meaningful experience. It feels like a quality time spent with your child over the summer. So that is one thing you can totally do over the summer with your kids. You can absolutely whip out the crayons, do what you got to do and think about your company vision. Learn And your vision needs to energize you. If it is not energizing you, then what you just did was come up with like a boring website company description. And that is not what we're going for here. So company vision with your kids, leverage your imagination, make sure you're tapping into your expansive thinking. This can be a fun thing. This is something you could write on a post it note, put on your laptop every time that you feel a bit exhausted, but it'll get you over that hump. That is one thing you could work on over the summer with your kids. There's a process behind them. There's a criteria, a five prong criteria for a company vision. All of that, those are the things that I share with my clients during the group coaching program, which effectively only takes about three hours of your time every single week. And most of it would be on your time because there's an on demand training component too. Here's a second thing you could work on over the summer alongside your kids. And this is, again, having to do with the three step method that I presented earlier. So these are like pieces of the method that I want to bring to life for you, for someone who wants to spend time with her kids, but also wants to continue with her work. Making progress on her business. I encourage you to work on your energy levers with your kids. What does that mean? So in order to be very productive You need to increase your Capacity in order to increase your capacity as a leader of a business It is important that you have the essentials down packed. What do I mean by the essentials? Well, when it comes to your nutrition, when it comes to movement, when it comes to your emotional health, all these things and sleep all need to be worked on in order for you to feel like you have more in you to give to the world. And these are the things you could work on over the summer with your kids. Personally, my kids still go to bed at 8 PM. I don't care if it's a break or not. Because ultimately, mommy doesn't want to break and so for me, when it comes to these energy levers with my children, I mean, I'm very much so well practiced over every single break and that is something you could work on over the summer with your kids and you can feel like you're making them. Major progress pertaining to your business goals in the fall. Why is that? Because right now you need to gather energy. You need to figure out like when you are best, are you a morning person, a nighttime person, do you get more output before your kids wake up or when your kids go to sleep in terms of your business? Figuring those things out now over the summer will pay off in the fall. You don't want to spend the fall season thinking about how to organize yourself. You want to think about and plan these things over the summer and you can absolutely do this with your kids. Here's one thought for, for food or food for thought, right? Imagine if taking a nap with your kid over the summer, like one day, imagine if that would actually be a great investment into your business. Like, is that possible? I know it is. And so I want to encourage you to think about that over the summer. Here's something else that you can work on. This is the third one. Third thing you could work on over the summer with your kids and feel like you're making progress on your business. This idea of storytelling, when it comes to storytelling, it is so urgent that you are able to articulate a story that is going to resonate with the right person. Who can help you take your business to the next level come in the fall. So why not practice the art of storytelling with your children? A, they're going to be honest. If you're telling a story and it's boring, they're going to tell you. B, they're also going to challenge you so that you can really, really have some sort of focused message. You can really be more innovative in terms of the way that you articulate a story. You can speak more clearly, maybe a little faster, make it a bit more punchy. I mean, they can absolutely help you communicate and they can even help you Draw on a napkin your story, draw on a napkin what makes your business different, draw on a napkin your business idea. Why is that important? So here's the thing, when I've spoken with a lot of mom founders who have business ideas and want to bring on investors. They, they have shared with me how they feel that oftentimes a man who has the same idea could just draw something on a napkin and then he'll be cut a million dollar check. And so that is why I encourage you, a mom founder, to actually, over the summer with your kids, again, break out the crayons, the markers, or what have you, and draw on a friggin napkin your ideas. Leverage the art of storytelling, practice this with your children and you will be better off come the fall. Now these are very practical ways for you to optimize your summer days so that this way in the fall you don't feel as rusty. And these are core skills pertaining to networking. And here's what I want to really say about that. When it comes to networking, you need to have a kickass company vision, period. If your company vision doesn't light you up like a Christmas tree, then there's no way that you're going to magnetize the sort of investors, partners, or clients that you would want. That's step one. Two, when it comes to selling anything, enthusiasm and illustrating high energy, again, those energy levers you'll be working on over the summer with your kids. If you don't have that sense of energy and this ability to just like bounce from enthusiasm pertaining to talking about your business, you're just not going to get the attention that you deserve on your business, nor on Your own story. And so again, this is going to be helpful in terms of networking. I'll tell you what, when I interview my podcast guests, for example, when I interviewed Beth Comstock, former CMO of GE, something that she shared with me and on a lot of my podcast guests have shared with me is that they love my energy. And this is not about inflating my ego at all. What it is is it is a strategy I can teach you to grow. But let's start getting the basics down in terms of practicing these energy levers that I just shared earlier with your kids over the summer. Then, when it comes to storytelling, how does this help you with regards to networking? You want to be interesting. Otherwise, who's going to want to hang out with you? And the bar for interesting? Is totally doable. I don't want you to feel like, Oh, I'm not that interesting. I'm just a mom. I just do like regular things like that is absolutely ridiculous. You and I can have the most fun time humanly possible by just talking about something that we have both experienced over the summer. I'm pretty sure we can. And honestly, you are interesting. I just want you to just see that as a fact. I want you to just not even imagine that that's impossible. And at the end of the day, you're so interesting that you decided to create a family and create a business and create a life that you absolutely want. to cherish. So I believe you are interesting. So yeah, interesting people tend to network with interesting people, interesting people hang out with interesting people. And so that is going to be important pertaining to things you could do over the summer to actually go ahead and feel like in the fall, you're not so rusty. You have some very relevant networking skills and you have an idea of what works best for you and your family by way of energy levers. Okay, so what does this all mean for you? I just shared with you a sense of how you can make this summer freaking amazing pertaining for being with your kids and also making progress on your business. I just shared with you things that you can absolutely sneak into the day and leverage your imagination expert in residence at the same time. And these are things that you can do on your own. I mean, you could effectively devote about three hours a week this summer working on these things. Thanks. But, here's the thing. If you don't have the nuances behind my step by step method, my three step method, as in, what each step contains, then it is going to be way harder to get the juice out of this lemon over the summer. The other thing is if you don't have access to other moms that are trying to do the same thing, then that means you're going to be hoping to find motivation to keep going versus having that group experience and that group encouragement available to you if you join me and four other mom founders this June in my group coaching program, fertile imagination. To networking success for mom founders. We kick off in mid June. Now, am I nuts to kick off in mid June for mom founders? Absolutely not. I'm not, because what I know to be true is that all you would need is to dedicate three hours a week for nine weeks through the necessary steps that I have shared with you in this episode, along with the steps that we would go through together. In my group coaching program, this is what I know to be true, to be the case that you need in order to feel so ready in September to speak with the right people and to have the right conversations that can truly take your business to the next level. Let me give you an example with regards to my client, Michelle, something she shared with me, which I'm so proud of pertaining to her experience in the program is the following. She had known about the first IVF baby for years before partnering with me in this program. But having gone through this program and gone from feeling hesitant to put her big dreams out there, too bold about asking for what she wants, she had the guts to actually approach the first IVF baby and ask her to wear her merchandise. And she's like a huge influencer. I'll share the testimonial that Michelle has after this episode, so you can hear what else she got out of the program. But what I encourage you to do is really just imagine, imagine if you used this summer to get so ready for the fall, that in the fall, you didn't feel like you were behind. You didn't feel rusty anymore. You didn't feel like you never get to win and you also got to use this summer in a way that filled your heart as a mom who could be present with her kids and also share with her kids a piece of herself, her business. And I think that's important. I really do think it's important. So here's the action step for you. I want to speak with you. I want to speak with you soon because of the following reason. This cohort of five mom founders in total who are going to be part of Fertile Imagination to Networking Success for Mom Founders this season, so this mid June, this cohort is going to have things that are exclusive opportunities. The investment level for this cohort is going to be at a 30 percent discount for participating in this round in terms of having a private midpoint coaching session that is going to be a bonus for someone that participates in this round starting mid June. You're also going to have an opportunity to be a guest on my podcast. If you're starting in this round again, starting in mid June, and you're going to have my eyes on your business so that you have a sounding board for whenever you want to approach a investor, you want to approach a partner, you want to approach a podcast guests or someone that's going to sponsor your business, you're going to have the opportunity to ask me, Hey, Melissa, am I being direct in what I want? Hey, Melissa, is this email going to get. Opened and is my message on target with what you and I talked about or hey, Melissa, if I do this in the fall, am I going to reap the most rewards or am I going to be like stretching myself thin again? Like I did last year. These are all the sort of questions I have answered for my mom founder clients in the past in my group coaching program. So I want to be sure that. If you are curious about participating in a program with me, this is your shot. This is your shot to participate with me over the summer. And really, I am so, so committed to making sure that when you're partnering with me, we are honest about the motherhood season that you are in. We are honest about the business season that you are in, because that is how we can make it work. It is important that you do spend time on your business, but it is obviously even more important that you're a present parent. And I make sure of it pertaining to my group coaching program. So I will leave you with that. You will hear Michelle's Q& A with me right after this. And I really encourage you to do that. To reach out to me, the link will be in the show notes. You can absolutely schedule 15 minutes with me for free. We'll go through the program details and I will answer everything that's on your mind in terms of the group coaching experience. Again, it would just require three hours of your time each week. Most of it is on your own time from your, your couch or anywhere you are in the world. It'll be about one hour. That is a Q and a session and I'll give you all those details on our 15 minute free call. So go ahead and call me or schedule that time with me. And we will absolutely go through the details. You can also email me melissa. lorina at gmail. com. Everything is in the show notes, and I hope you have the best summer ever. I never do this, but I wanted to just share a conversation between Michelle and myself pertaining to her very specific experience in the fertile imagination to networking success. Group coaching program, certainly, if you have any questions pertaining to being one of my five mom founders this summer, so that this way in the fall, you are as confident and competent as Michelle is in distinguishing her organization versus anyone else and the confidence that she had to reach out to the first IVF baby. If you want some of that confidence by this fall, Go ahead and send me an email, Melissa dot Lorena at gmail. com or sign up for 15 minutes with me on my calendar. You can see all this information in the show notes right on your device. All right. Enjoy the conversation. It is really raw and candid, and I hope that it really answers any questions pertaining to what it would be like to partner with me and to have me as a mentor, I would love to have the conversation and I'd be honored to support you and your company.
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231: How to Answer Your Calling featuring Non-Profit Co-Founder Michelle Valiukenas of the Colette Louise Tisdahl Foundation
What's your calling? Ever thought you might be called to something more? What if your calling is waiting to be answered today? This could be the most inconvenient time for a calling to come your way, yet it can also be the perfect time for you to rise up and show up for yourself and others. If this resonates with you, then this is the episode you won't want to miss. Join us as we dive into a conversation with Michelle Valiukenas, a mom founder who answered her calling and created an incredible impact through The Colette Louise Tisdahl Foundation. I'm thrilled to introduce you to Michelle Valiukenas, an extraordinary mom founder whose journey and accomplishments are nothing short of inspiring. Michelle is the founder of The Colette Louise Tisdahl Foundation, a nonprofit dedicated to improving outcomes in pregnancy, childbirth, postpartum, and infancy, as well as supporting grieving families through financial assistance, education, and advocacy. But this episode is about more than just Michelle's impressive achievements. It's about you and the unique calling in your life. My intention for this conversation is to encourage you to answer that calling, to find the courage and inspiration to pursue your purpose just as Michelle has. Throughout our discussion, which feels as much like a mentorship session as it does an interview, you'll hear the powerful story behind The Colette Louise Tisdahl Foundation and the critical needs it addresses—needs that often go unmet by insurance, social workers, and government organizations. Michelle's story is a poignant reminder that the problems you see and the passions you hold might be signs pointing you toward your own calling. You might think that someone else is already tackling the issues that matter to you, but as Michelle's experience shows, there are gaps that only you can fill. This episode is your sign to step up and make a difference. So, let's dive in and explore how you can answer the calling in your life, just as Michelle has. Let's talk about your calling. https://www.instagram.com/melissallarena/ This episode is brought to you by Fertile Imagination to Networking Success: a LIVE 9-week group coaching masterclass designed to fast-track your connections with the right people to elevate your business. Before we continue today's conversation with today's guest Michelle, a participant of the Fertile Imagination to Networking Success for Mom Founders program I want to ask you a question. Are you a visionary mom founder who knows that she needs to get better at networking because the growth of her business depends on it? Has feeling awkward, or uncomfortable ever gotten in your way from putting yourself in the right rooms and stepping forward to talk to the right people who can cut you a huge check that can change the trajectory of your business and take your business to its rightful next level? This is an exclusive call for 5 mom founders to join FI to Networking Success this summer. By dedicating just 3 hours a week, you'll be prepared to hit the ground running this fall. You'll get better at networking, identify the right connections to propel your business forward with clarity, and develop a mom-friendly strategy that works regardless of your kids' needs. My proven three-step method—Imagination to Impact to Income—will help you confidently and competently put yourself out there, ensuring you stay connected to your business and dreams in a manageable way, even as you spend more time with your kids this summer. You can have both. But here's the catch—you need to act fast. If improving your networking and selling skills is a priority, now is the time. This transformative program is available at a 30% discount for those who join my June cohort. To secure your spot, we must talk in May. If you wait until June, the investment level will increase and spots may be filled. Will I offer this program again? Not in this way and not with these exclusive add-ons: An intimate, five-participant cohort of mission-driven mom founders. This means personalized access to me, similar to a VIP one-on-one mentorship, which could be valued at 10X the investment level of this group coaching program. As an added bonus, you will be featured and heavily advertised as a guest on my podcast, Unimaginable Wellness, alongside trailblazers like Suzy Batiz, Asha Curran, and Beth Comstock. For a limited time, you'll have direct access to me for personalized feedback on your outreach efforts—an invaluable opportunity to accelerate your progress and maximize your results. Exclusive to securing your spot in May for June, you'll receive a midpoint private session. This working session will focus on executing your outreach plan—it's about immersion and action. Move quickly to take advantage of this unique opportunity and transform your business while nurturing your family. Secure your 15-minute program details call today! Book a 15-minute call HERE: https://go.oncehub.com/ClientSessionMelissaLlarena Let me know if you have questions about the program via email Melissa[.]Llarena [at] gmail.com Official bio Michelle Valiukenas, once described as a "social worker trapped in the body of an attorney," began her career representing domestic and sexual assault victims in litigation. After a decade, she was called in another direction after losing her second baby, Colette. She remains the proud mom of two angel babies, Sweet Pea and Colette, and her only living child, her son, Elliott Miguel. Michelle now runs The Colette Louise Tisdahl Foundation, which she founded to improve outcomes in pregnancy, childbirth, postpartum, and through infancy as well as support grieving families through financial assistance, education, and advocacy. Since its launch in 2018, the foundation has helped over 2,300 families and distributed more than $1.5 million in grants. Their ability to give is dependent on the generosity of donors, partners, and supporters and any help is always appreciated. A writer, speaker, and advocate, Michelle addresses topics like infertility, pregnancy loss, and parenting after loss. She advocates for reproductive rights, health equity, infertility awareness, and the needs of families. At home, she enjoys relaxing with her son, husband Mark, and their dog, Nemo. Links: Donate: www.colettelouise.com FB: https://www.facebook.com/colettetisdahl IG: https://www.instagram.com/colettelouisetisdahl/ Linkedin: https://www.linkedin.com/in/michellevaliukenastisdahl/ Twitter: https://twitter.com/TheTisdahl You Tube: https://www.youtube.com/channel/UCbanq9_1LEX6hoxGeLGU3Zg Transcript: So let's start with. With you. So Michelle, share with us, share with the listeners who you are and a bit about your organization and really, really let us know like what makes your organization distinguishable versus other organizations in this space. Absolutely. Well, thank you. So I'm Michelle. I'm a mom of three. I have two angel babies, Sweetpea and Colette, and an almost four year old who I think has the energy of all three of them. And our road to parenthood was It was tough. We struggled with infertility. I've only ever gotten pregnant via IBF and we lost our first pregnancy and then with our second, our daughter Collette made it past the scary first trimester and when I was 21 weeks pregnant, I was hospitalized with severe preeclampsia. And told you'll be here until you deliver. And so just talk about the world sort of just coming to a pause and thinking, what is it, what are we going to do? And once I was hospitalized, I was in the hospital about a day or two, it occurred to me how blessed and how lucky I was that we could actually afford. to handle this hospitalization and what was likely going to be a NICU stay. And I also realized in that same vein is that I knew I was definitely the minority that could do that. And so I remember turning to my husband and saying, we need to do something about this, all of that. And he, he turned to me and he said, please, for the love of God, could you please just worry about yourself once? And I said, well, that's not really what I do. Who are you married? What are you talking about? But really it just sort of stayed with me and throughout the whole process it kept coming back to me in my head. Ultimately I was in the hospital just over three weeks and then the doctors recommended delivery. So Collette was born at 24 weeks and five days and went straight to the NICU. And we spent nine days in the NICU before she died and I always call it she gained her angel wings. In that whole process, going through NICU and seeing the whole, the toll it takes on parents, right? And I was being told by doctors and nurses, and I was hearing doctors and nurses tell other parents, you might want to save your leave time, go back to work now, and save your leave time for when baby comes home. And I had a very difficult postpartum recovery, and I couldn't imagine. I was in no shape to go back to work. There was absolutely no way that I could have gone back to work. And Just thinking about that and thinking how much time they were losing with their kids and not being participating. And so all of those kinds of things just kind of sort of making this idea and this thought process to provide financial assistance for families. And when I got out, so I had worked in nonprofits my whole life, and when I got out, I had always sworn. I would never, ever, ever, ever, ever start my own nonprofit. And so funny things never say never. And so I thought somebody else was doing this. And what I found was I'm still to the state. I don't see that anybody is touching the pregnancy part in terms of financial assistance. And that to me was very important. So organizations were hitting NICU or law and or loss. But nobody was helping pregnancy. There were very specific locations, so it might be a certain state, a certain county, certain hospital. And there was very formulaic, this is what we provide, are these things. And so I was looking at it and I was thinking, first of all, On the location idea, I've always been a proponent of health equity and fairness, and I thought why should it mean that, like, just because I deliver at a certain hospital, I can get financial assistance, but if I deliver at another hospital, I can't. So that was very much a thought process. The fact that pregnancy wasn't included, and I felt like that was a big piece of not only our story, but of a lot of people's stories, right? And, and it's just kind of. Makes sense. If you're helping in pregnancy, you have less there's less chance of long NICU hospitalizations and less chance of loss. And so doing that. And then I didn't want to be very formulaic. I wanted to know for me, it's always like every family is different and has different needs. And so I really wanted something that would Allow us to look at each application, each family independently and adjust what we were doing based on their need. And so we launched on CLED's due date, so September 7th of 2018, and it's just been amazing to see the, the takeoff and the need that is happening. So we are. Right now we have helped over 2, 300 families. We've hit all 50 States and we've given away a little over 1. 5 million. And it's just been crazy. And we're not, we're not meeting the need. I mean, the need is so great. And so many people just really find themselves in these situations that become crises. And that there's no planning for a lot of these. So I was curious, that thought somebody else is doing this, somebody else must be paying attention to this cause. I think that's something that happens oftentimes when, when we feel like, okay, there's a little bit of media coverage, as they say, like maternity leave, paternity leave, like these topics are like spoken of, right? Like in media, social media and all of that. And so it's, it's very easy. For us to assume, well, someone else must be handling that. There must be someone who's the advocate of this message and this cause. And so my question to you is the following. So in your world, right? Like where does the book stop? So like certain organizations are handling. What sort of expenses, and then where do you like close the gap or meet the need that is not being fulfilled by those entities or other entities? Right. Great question. So I think one of the biggest things is that there's a cap on services. So there's organizations that, for example, will give to families that qualify under their guidelines, they will give 100 gift card. And that could be gas, that could be food, that kind of thing. And that's great. And we still, we have a lot of our families who have also requested that help or received that help, depending on how it is. And so that's something, again, like the pregnancies piece is not a problem. Being taken into, into account, some organizations, they have X amount of dollars and they give them out where we're very fiscally responsible about how we're giving them out throughout the year, but there are some organizations that might get X amount of dollars. And then once that's up, they're done until the next budget cycle. And so not loving that where we're not stuck to. A certain dollar amount, we're not stuck to what people might need. And we've been very adaptable to what our families need. We didn't think about just because it wasn't something that really factored into our experience, but we didn't think about the cost of transportation and that being a really big request and that remains our number one, number two request. And it makes sense because we have found that our average family is traveling 62 miles one way to the NICU. And so that's a. Huge cost that adds up really, really quickly, right? And that's the average. I mean, we've had people who are driving, driving 200, 300 miles to do, to get to the NICU. And so I think we've been very much like, let's hear from families. Let's see what they need. We also spent a lot of time talking with social workers to say, what are the things coming up? But really it's trying to get a little bit of support so that a family could it. Do a pregnancy bedrest or limitations that they can be seen their babies as much as they can, that they can do the memorialization of their loss. And so it's really been, I mean, we sit and we review every single application and really read it and, and really try to find where it is that we can help. And what are the things that we can do that gets Things accomplished. And I think that that's really unique. We, we don't have formulaic anything. I mean, we look at it. There are things we've never covered that will come up. So for example, I'm thinking of, we had a girl who was 16, had a baby in the NICU and what she had told her social worker, her biggest fear was that she was sort of stuck in this cycle. Her mom had gotten pregnant very young with her. Her grandmother had gotten very pregnant with her mother. And neither of them had finished high school. And so for her. She was like, I want to do better for my, for my child. And so she said, I would like to finish my high school degree. And so they worked with us and the hospital was able to find a laptop that she could use to do online school while she was sick. at the NICU, so with her baby, being able to do that. And we helped with her tuition to finish that degree. And so it's not in the grand scheme of things, like it's not necessarily that her being able to do this meant her baby did better, but it also meant she was starting something and, and doing something and breaking a cycle, which I think is a huge issue. And so those are the things that we want to hear about too. All of those like unique one off things. Situations that may only happen to one family ever and really taking the time to look at those. Okay. So again, on that thread, right? Somebody else is doing this because I think, like, let's say like watching TV and seeing current events and seeing things on TV and we're kind of like stuck in our own lives, right? We're like, okay, well, I have food. I have water. I have resources as an example. And I imagine a lot of the listeners might feel really, really confused. Blessed and also just like, not in the same state of needing donations, right? In order to get through a really rough and emotionally trying moment. So, okay. Along that thread of somebody else is doing this. It sounds to me, Michelle, that. Somebody else was not going to help that girl feel a sense of accomplishment and then carry that, that positive feeling and emotional state as she was with her NICU baby, like, and babies Feel us like they know, right? Like they know if mommy is okay, like they can tag. So, okay. So somebody else was not doing that in terms of tuition for this one person. So same idea. Why don't you share a couple of other instances that might not feel so obvious to someone that's never been in that situation, but would like to help you, especially Mother's Day just passed. And obviously. We don't really need just one day to be celebrated and respected. This should be like annual all the time forever. So, okay, what's another thing that somebody else was not doing, but through the foundation, you guys were doing and you guys are a lean team. I just want to say that right now. Like when, when, when we're saying when Michelle is saying like somebody else is doing this, it's like legit, like a. Family in a house with a child, with a bunch of energy and trying to do something that's so amazing. Right. So go ahead. Give us another, another moment. Yeah, I think we've done things like a family who has lost a baby and maybe was able to come up with the money for a cremation, but might just have ashes in a box and don't have them in a really pretty urn. Right. And, and it's not that urns are super expensive, but. If a family has been through a lot and may not be able to afford the 400, the 500 that an earn could be. So those are things on the last thing as well. Sometimes we have families who, again, they've, they've had something covered. It might be that. Their particular community has a, has a program, has a plan. Sometimes funeral homes just donate the whole thing and they, they like recoup the expenses, things like that. But then they want memorial jewelry. They want something that they can hold onto their baby as they go forward. And especially in really early pregnancy losses, they don't get the, they don't get the funerals and services and things like that. And so that might be the only way that they can really remember their baby and remember what that means. And so some people will sort of look at it and say, why are you covering jewelry? And what we know is that that's. That's not just a piece of jewelry, right? This is not, this is something that is really important and that reminds people. I mean, you talked about Mother's Day and I think anybody who has ever lost from the earliest pregnancy all the way through an infant knows that a lot of people, especially the earlier in the pregnancy that it is, don't really look at people like moms and dads. And so that's something that I think is saying. Even if the world doesn't see me, that I know and I'm recognizing my motherhood, my fatherhood, and I think that's really important to do. On NICU, it's been, sometimes it's medical equipment that they're sent home with that insurance doesn't cover. So it might be the, I'm trying to think, it's like there's an oxygen concentrator that a lot of babies are sent home with that they might need and it could be a couple hundred dollars and insurance doesn't cover that or they're deductible. And so we're helping with those kinds of situations because we don't want kids going back to the NICU. We don't want parents Because they have no other option, skipping doctor recommended steps and things like that because they can't have another option. Helping with post NICU, right? So sometimes we have a family who has already been discharged, but when I talked about the distance, Of a NICU that also means that once they go home, they have a distance of doctor's appointments and they may have a lot depending on NICU babies can, can run the whole spectrum of things. Right. And so if they have to see multiple doctors pretty regularly and they're doing that drive, we want to help with those situations. We want to help when they go, if they have to go back to the hospital, which is always terrible, but some, we will do that too. We've had. Family is where baby is sent home, but then needs heart surgery or some sort of surgery and they need to be older and weigh more and be a little bit healthier. So they'll go home for six months and then come back and then the costs are the same, but they're not NICU, they're in a different situation. And for us, we use NICU, but very, very adapted kind of things of what that really means. And I think that that's really important. Anything in the pregnancy sphere can be childcare. If you think of a stay at home mom who hasn't really needed to use childcare and then is put on bed rest, any parents, anybody who's been around toddlers and kids knows bed rest with children around that's not happening. Right. And so is it childcare so that the pregnant person can. Actually have some bed rest or in situations where they can't lift a lot with that child care help doing that, all of those kinds of things that just I think are so useful and so helpful. We had, we had a story of a woman who, and luckily her doctor was really responsive. She was missing. She was a high risk pregnancy and she had to be going to weekly visits pretty early in the pregnancy. Okay. And the doctor started noticing that she would miss appointments last minute and cancel last minute or not show up or show up an hour late, all this. And luckily the doctor reached out to a social worker and said, I don't know what's going on, but something clearly is happening. And so the social worker reached out and it turned out she didn't have reliable transportation. She was relying on not a great public trans, not a really great public transportation option or relying on friends and family for rides. And that wasn't. Reliable. And so we were able to set her up so that she was using, she could use lift rides that were charged to our account to go to and from prenatal visits. Right. And so, you know, you look at that and you think she ended up giving birth to, I think the baby was either full term or very close to full term. So baby was in the hospital a couple of days and then released. Right. And did her going to regular prenatal appointments help that? Absolutely. Absolutely. And so I think it's really just being gracious and understanding. And I think that one of the things that also separates us from a lot of places is we've been through all three of these stages. And so we know, and we can think of things. I mean, we're talking about the distance of NICU. Colette was in a NICU that was, 10 to 15 minutes from our house and that felt so far for us and that we actually looked into do we get an Airbnb right here? The reason why we didn't was because the way that the hospital is set up, there was hotel options was still going to be like a five minute drive and things like that. And so we ultimately were like, well, we'd rather be in our comfort in our home if we're already going to have this. But if there had been a hotel across the street, We would have been in that and that was very something. So when you start adding up long distances where people can't go every day, can't, they're going once a week or whatever, that's really difficult. That's really something else. So this episode is brought to you by Fertile Imagination to Networking Success, a live masterclass designed to fast track your connections with the right people to elevate your business. Before we continue today's conversation with our guest, Michelle, a participant of the fertile imagination to networking success program, I want to ask you a question. Are you a visionary mom founder? We're hearing Michelle's story and she has a huge vision and a huge ask. But do you also have a big mission that you want to fulfill in this one divine life? If it is the case for you, here's the question. Has not being able to network with confidence, with poise, with intention ever gotten in your way? Do you feel like not feeling that networking comes naturally for you, or maybe it's this feeling awkward about talking to strangers, or maybe you put your foot in your mouth, or you just don't know what to say or how to start, has that ever gotten in the way of the growth of your business? Does the growth of your business actually depend on building relationships that are mutually beneficial with other people, people who you do not yet know. If that is the case, then this is a call for five mom founders only. I want you and I to have a conversation about this if this is pulling at your heart if networking is something that you need to get better at five mom founders this summer will be partnering together to help one another get better at networking and the best part it'll be this summer. It'll only require three hours a week on your terms and time so that this way come this September, you can hit the ground running, totally running. So you get better at networking. If you participate in fertile imagination to networking success, you'll be able to identify the right connections to propel your business forward in the fall. with clarity and you would have already developed a mom friendly strategy that works regardless of what your kids need. My proven three step method that Michelle knows intimately at this point, the imagination, To impact to income method will help you get way better at networking just in time for the fall. And it's going to help you be more confident and feel more connected. Competent about putting yourself out there so that you can do it a lot more in the fall so that this way you are going to stay connected over the summer with your business so that come in the fall, you will not feel like a fish out of the water. You will not feel like it's been a little bit. You're a little rusty when it comes to being a professional and engaging with people. You know why? Because over the summer as one of the five mom founders who can participate in my group coaching experience, you will have an opportunity to To work on your story, you will have an opportunity to understand how you need to plan out the rest of your year as it relates to your networking activities. You will have clarity in terms of what needs to happen in the fall. So that this way, regardless of where you are in terms of your annual goals, you can exceed them. So that this way, if you feel behind on what you have been able to accomplish the beginning of this year, you can accelerate, put the foot on the gas and talk to people who already know what you need to do in order to improve your business outcomes. So here's something that I wanted to share with you. I would love to have a conversation with you. If this is resonating, if you know that networking is something that you have got to get good at. And there is no time like the summer when business might be a little slower, when you might be able to have more time to yourself as opposed to supporting clients so that this way you can do all the work it takes in order to feel completely ready in the fall by way of networking. So here's something that is so important. I am only bringing on five mom founders this summer. Is huge. This is going to be unlike any other time in my life. I wanna tell you exactly why you will want to talk to me on a 15 minute call on Zoom about. How networking can help your business grow exponentially, immediately. So you will want to reach out to me this month of May because only if you and I speak this May and only if you participate in my cohort this summer, Will you have access to these bonuses, these extras, these never again coming your way opportunities in terms of being part of Fertile Imagination to Networking Success, the program that Michelle, the guest on today's episode, participated in and has gotten success from. Here we go. So only now this program, this nine week program that is virtual, that will only need three hours of your time each week. And really two hours are on your time, wherever you are in the world. It's on demand. One hour will be with me and a group of four other like minded, intense, wonderful women who also want to learn how to network. But here's the thing. So this program is available only this time at a 30 percent discount for those who joined my June cohort and there will only be five spots. That is it. And that is why it is important to speak now in May in order to secure your spot so that this way you get guaranteed that spot in June. If you wait beyond June to speak with me about this group coaching program, the investment level is going to increase and the spots are not guaranteed whatsoever. Now will I offer this program again? Not in this way, not with these exclusive add ons. Let me explain. Here are the add ons that will never come your way again. If you do not have a conversation with me, this may pertaining to participating in the virtual imagination to networking success. group coaching program, which is virtual. Okay. Never again, exclusive to the first five mom founders who participate in this program this June exclusive. So five people will be in this cohort. It is going to be intimate. It is practically personalized access to me. Very similar to a VIP one on one mentorship experience over the course of nine weeks. And that could have been valued at least 10 X the investment level. So I want to just say that is huge. This investment level, this level of access for me to answer your questions so that you are totally unstoppable in the fall will not happen again. It will only happen for these five mom founders at this 30 percent discounted rate. If that, this might actually be more than a 30 percent discounted rate at this moment. Also exclusive to joining me as the group of five, this June month. Also, you will be featured and heavily advertised as a guest on my podcast, unimaginable wellness, this right here and this platform. There are trailblazers who are also featured like Susie Batiste, who invests in different businesses like Asha Karan, who. I mean, has spread generosity throughout the world. People like Beth Comstock, the former CMO of GE, who's on the board of different organizations. You will absolutely be in the scene in the same Light in terms of these icons, because you will have an opportunity to be on my podcast and I will feature you and your story like no one's business that is not coming for anyone beyond the five mom founders this June, that is exclusive, that is, that is worth the price of entry period. Also, for a limited time, only if you participate in June at this discounted rate of 30%, only in June, will you have personalized feedback from me on your outreach efforts? What does that mean? If you have to go and write an email to the chief procurement officer of L'Oreal, I will hold your hand and I will, I will help you write exactly the right words. I will help you ensure that that person gets back to you. That is how high touch this very specific program will be in June only. Also by securing your spot and talking to me in May so that you are one of the five mom founders in this cohort. You will also receive a midpoint private session. This working session is going to focus on executing your outreach plan. It's about immersion and action. It is about getting this done. There is just no way under the sun. I want any mom to feel left behind or behind on her ambitions. I am in it to win it with you first five mom founders. We must talk in May about one of five spots in June. Again, you're going to want to move very quickly to learn further details about fertile imagination to networking success, a group coaching program that will launch in June. Michelle already went through it. You can hear her story. You can witness how I would coach you. If you were a participant in this group, And you could also have a sense for the fact that Michelle got a lot more than she imagined. Not only has it been favorable in terms of her business, in terms of her boldness, in terms of how she's going out and talking to people that can absolutely change the course of her non profit, Also, she realizes, appreciates, and does not feel any longer conflicted about spending time with her son playing, because now the reframe is that that is in support of your imagination, the skill that you need in order to innovate in your business, in order to thrive. Talk to people in order to have a conversation. That's going to be fruitful for everyone. And in order for you to achieve what is on your heart. So my question to you again is, are you a visionary mom founder? If you are, let's talk, just head on over to the link in my show notes. If you are listening to this on a drive, on a run. And then go ahead and write my email address. It is melissa. larina at gmail. com m e l i s s a dot l l a r e n a at gmail. com. I could've given you my business email, but I wanted to give you one that was 100 percent straight to me. And this has to be done in May so that you can be guaranteed one of five spots in June so that you can absolutely have the answers that you need real time practically so that you can be part of an intimate group of women who want to be and bring the best of themselves to both of their worlds. Being a mom and being a business owner as well. You can have it all this summer. This program is truly, truly, truly flexible because it was built for mom founders. That is precisely what I have been for 12 years, and I am honored to support and serve you on your journey. So go ahead, reach out to me, look in the show notes. I will put a direct link to my calendar for 15 minutes also. That's an alternative. So it's quite simple to get in touch with me. Email me or schedule the 15 minute. I appreciate either approach and my Instagram account is also always in the show notes. So. Either way you slice it, I'm available for it. And there's not much time. It is like May 16 today, the day that I am recording this. So please be aware that as I speak to people first come first serve, these exclusives are exclusive. If you and I speak in May and you don't, you join in the June cohort. Okay. So a little bit more information. What. is inside fertile imagination for networking success. I want to just share with you a bit more so you will know how to initiate the right conversations with the right people who can take your business to the next level fastest. So you're going to have your own signed paperback copy of my bestseller fertile imagination so that this way you can transcend the limitations of your current ceiling and unlock your most expansive thinking. That is really important when you're a mom founder. And you've got a lot of things that change. Okay. You will also Have access to weekly on demand training videos that will empower you with the imagination to impact to income method. What does this mean? You will have a step by step system to elevate your company and personal vision. You will know how to pinpoint your primary focus for maximum business impact. You will know how to increase your energy and productivity. You will know how to innovate. You will know, you will know how to navigate imposter syndrome, refine your leadership narrative and strategize networking efforts, right? Tailored to your business, tailored to your stage of motherhood. That is huge. I have not seen that anywhere in my entire life, which is why I wanted to create it. Then in terms of time with me, with the other members of this cohort, this very special cohort that will be happening in June, you will have an opportunity to join us nine times and ask us anything in terms of what you've got going on. We will be doing some role playing or hot seat sessions. We will be able to help you really regain your weekly focus. Every single week is a different week. And so we are there for it because It's like minded women, and you will have lifetime access to these resources and implementation tools very specifically so that you can turbocharge your networking efforts come this fall, the rest of the year, the rest of your life, please be aware this program is one where it is live in the sense that every week. I will help you every week you have a question. Something is getting in your way from the growth of your business or achieving a networking win. I will help you if you have anything that has held you in the past from investing in yourself. I invite you to consider this an investment in your legacy. This is not an investment in yourself alone. This is an investment in the legacy of you and your family. When I think about my podcast and the skills that I've used and how I have used my imagination to impact to income method, this has helped me build a treasure trove or treasure box of contacts and humans and beautiful people that can not only help me right now, and I can help of course, but can then help my children and my children's children going forward. This is not about me. The program is not about you. This is an investment in your legacy. So let's go and have that conversation. 15 minutes and the link is available for you. Enjoy the rest of the conversation. Yeah. I mean, what I'm hearing you say, Michelle, is that. What distinguishes your organization versus the big name organizations that I'm sure a lot of people have heard of that are in a similar space, maybe not specifically pregnancy, but kind of thereabouts, is that the dollars that are donated to Your organization are going to actually get through to a patient or a parent. And then on top of that, there's something very distinguishable, which is the simple fact that a lot of people have lost touch. With what other people who are emotionally incapable of expressing what they need, they've lost touch of what someone actually needs, like only, only someone like yourself and your family, Michelle could read an application and say, you know what, no, this person is asking for a piece of jewelry with their child's name, birthday, whatever it might be, not because they just want to be flashy, but because they Because this is like the emotional connection that they get to have, like literally just softly on top of their heart. You know what I mean? Like, I don't know that someone who hasn't been through it would read an application in the same way. And I also don't imagine that a big organization that has been around is going to be as sensitive because it's, it's a reality, right? So different organizations have different. KPIs and they have different commitments that they have to make to different people. But this organization is, is so grassroots. It's so real and it's been already impactful across the 50 states over a million dollars. I mean, what's the exact number I want to be sure just over 1. 5. Yeah. Yeah. Operating out of your home while you're looking at your child and your husband is. Your support. So I think, I think there's a lot to be said in terms of getting to know your organization, getting to know you and really supporting you. And I want, I want to just ask you something that's like, so, so bold. I mean, like we're talking like. I don't even know another planet, right? Kind of bold. So let's just imagine, let's imagine that there is someone listening to this conversation right now. And this person has, they got their tax money back, let's say, right? So they got like some thousands of dollars back from taxes and they themselves Maybe they're a rainbow baby, right? Or maybe, or maybe they have suffered some sort of a loss or have some reason to kind of want to support moms. Like what would be like that magic wand check that you would want that person to consider cutting and give it 30 days? Yeah, so I will tell you my, my goal right now is by the end of 2024 is to raise an additional 50, 000. The reason for that amount is we are budgeted right now to be fiscally responsible. We are budgeted, we give away 5, 000 every week and the need is far out far exceeding what we're giving out. We are always looking and so like any extra dollars that we can do, we are always trying to do a little bit more. Then that, but that's what we can responsibly know. We do. 50, 000 would allow us to go up to 6, 000 a week, which means that every week we would be helping between one and two more families. So our average giver give right now is about 500 a family. We do have up to a thousand with some families who just really need a lot more assistance And so it would really end up being probably a hundred more families next year that we could help And so that's that's really my goal So if anybody wants to write a fifty thousand dollar check today I would absolutely adore it and I would then be able to spend the rest of the year Perhaps just maybe getting we can get to 200 families, right? So that's really what I would say, but I think You On the donation piece, and I, and I really, this is something we've really worked hard for is we have worked with certain donors and they cover our overhead costs. And like Melissa said, we are very lean organization is mostly me. My husband helps me review applications just to see, I brought on an assistant to finally help me who works 20 hours a week. So we are very, very lean organization, but we have worked with donors. And so we have a couple of donors who cover our overhead. Expenses. And so every donation that comes in goes directly to the financial assistance program and directly to a family. So I, for me, that's always something I have looked at at other organizations. And I think there's some really big organizations that if you did, if you looked at. They are giving your, your donations going 50 percent to marketing or to anything like that. And that was something I wanted to be really clear that that was not our goal with raising money. Our goal was to help a lot, as many families as we could. And so it's going directly. 100 percent of that is going to a family in need. Perfect. Perfect. And so then I just wanted to slice that number up a bit because I know that someone listening might be like 50, 000. Oh my God, from my personal family budget. But no, let's think creatively, right? Let's use our imagination. So. What would be some other ways that someone can help who is listening to this conversation? And let me just like, start with this one idea. First of all, for the most part, if you work for an employer, they have a matching system, so that's an option available to you. So let's just imagine 25 is like, Not possible. So let's just say whatever the half of 25 is work was possible, right? Let's just imagine. Then you would ask your employer to have the other half. And again, I'm just thinking very big. That's one way, but something that you shared with me as a result of being in my group coaching program was this idea of using your birthday and how that was really, really helpful. So why don't you explain that? Cause that might be. An alternative for people listening, right? Yeah, we found the birthday really started on on Facebook and that you could have fundraisers for your birthday that your friends and family could donate to and that they would do it through Facebook. They would get tax receipts. Yeah, that way. And so it was a really good way. And so what we found was that families and friends who are doing that we're having pretty good success rates and right. And it could be anywhere from 100 to 100 up to it's really dependent on what the person would want us. That is a goal and much sort of promoting they want to do of that. Really, we were finding that that was a great way. I think, especially, I mean, as all of us get older, right, I don't want a lot of stuff. And so I would prefer that somebody donate, you know, those funds to a cause I would really believe in. Like, I would prefer those kinds of, Things. And so I think that's a great way to tell people, like, don't, don't spend your money on a gift for me. I don't need a gift. Could you instead donate to a cause I really believe in? And I think a lot of people are willing to do that and really willing to say, okay, that's great. One of the things, I mean, just today, my mom and her birthday is in October. So she's already thinking ahead that far. She said, I'd like to go to dinner with the family and then anything that you would have spent on me, I would like to be donated to the foundation. And that's a really, it's a really beautiful way to do things. And it's a really great way to just sort of say, I'm going to do it. And that a lot of people, I think we all can. Generally afford from time anywhere from 25 to 50 if, and that's saying you don't really have a lot of money, a lot of wiggle room in your budget. And so if you have good friends who would spend that amount of money on you to take you for dinner or for for drinks or something like that, or who would give you a gift saying instead, okay, don't don't do that and donate to a cause that I really believe in. And so that we have found is really been a huge. Like way that people can, can take advantage of, and it doesn't just have to be birthdays. It can be, I have a friend of mine from college who had twins in the NICU and she always promised that if everything worked out and they came home, that she would do a donation every year on their birthday. And so she does it for her kids birthdays. Right. And so I think it's just really great ways to, to kind of continue that. And Yeah, absolutely. And so before we close, just because you have a t shirt and I know that you have merchandise that is also in light of this organization, what does your t shirt say? It's a blue shirt for anyone listening to the audio. And then it says mama of an angel. And so. Yeah. And we have all of the, like we have of angel and of NICU warrior. We have mom, dad, grandma, grandpa, siblings. So my son wears often wear a brother of an angel shirt for NICU or NICU babies. We have onesies all the way up through kids shirts so that they themselves are NICU warriors. And then even in adult sizes, we have that as well. We have an IVF line that we have recently come out with. Yeah. For something that is really at risk and, and really trying to be challenged in a lot of different ways. So again, it's IVF baby all the way up through adult t shirts, IVF mom, dad, all of that. Yeah. And then, Oh, and then we also just added, I was like, I knew there was another area, but we just also added at a recommendation of a social worker we work with who said, I don't have personal experience, but I really want to root for people. So we now have an advocate line. So it's NICU advocate, IVF advocate, and loss advocate. And so really just trying to, I think, Okay. And you said this one time was like a t shirts, not just a t shirt. And I think that's really important when I wear this shirt and I have a NICU warrior and I have an IVF advocate and all of those things, when I wear this, I feel closer to Colette and, and it's also something that. My joke is always, I talk about a lot of taboo topics, right? When I wear these, I'm also telling other people like it's okay. And you are not alone. You're not the only other person. And it's so interesting how I get such great feedback where people will come up to me and say, well, I also have an angel baby or my sister. Lost a child or anything like that. And I think that's a really great just connection way to know that you're not alone and to know that other people are experiencing that and talking about it. So yes. And the proceeds go to our financial assistance program as well. So perfect, Michelle. So let's just give everyone a sense of where they can go to learn more about you and the organization. So website, social handles, what are they? Yeah. So it's Colette one L two T's Louise. com is our website on Facebook. We're Colette Tisdall T I S D A H L on Instagram. It's Colette Louise Tisdall on Twitter, which is my, my personal favorite. It's the Tisdall and, and then we're on YouTube, LinkedIn, and just really Google us. We come up and you can kind of check out all the different things. Thank you, Michelle. So I wanted to just close by saying the following because I think it really, it, it, it's important that, and this needs to be said period, but this idea that somebody else is doing this or somebody else must be doing this, or somebody might be paying attention to this topic is, is so like, that's a really dangerous thought. It's a really, really dangerous thought, and I think we have evidence of that in our surroundings and the world at these, at this time, and I think it's also, it's also something that needs to be really, really, you need to sit with this idea that, guess what? What if it's you? What if it's you who is supposed to be the advocate of that cause? What if it's you that's supposed to solve that challenge? What if it's you that's supposed to open your mouth, use your loud voice and amplify someone else who is no longer here on this earth? What if it's you? And I'm saying that to Listeners, I'm saying that to myself, I'm saying that to Michelle, like, I think it's really, really unfortunate that oftentimes when we see things, it's almost like we're desensitized, and we look the other way, like, oh, they must not be talking to me, there must be someone else handling this, that's super powerful. Here's the reality, oftentimes, there just is not. There, there really is not, there is not. And so I invite anyone that's listening more than anything else. There might be something on your heart. There might be a message that you want to share that you are thinking to yourself. Nah, they, I couldn't possibly make a dent in that world or, or someone else must be handling that. And I want you to just. Really thoughtfully sit with that, even meditate and consider the idea that maybe somebody else is not handling it and that somebody else is actually supposed to be you. And so I want to just end right there. Thank you so much, Michelle. And, and all of your links, you're welcome. And all of your links are going to be in the show notes. So if you're listening to this. Just look at the device at the bottom, look in the description and you'll see all these links at the same time. Michelle is super, super approachable. So if you want to know what's the best way for you to donate money to the organization, reach out to her. Would Instagram be the preferred place to kind of just send you a DM? That's totally fine. Any of the social media, any of that, like I said, we're really lean. So I'm, I'm checking all of those. There's no, nobody else is doing that. So, yes, it is definitely a very lean team. So thank you again, Michelle and anyone that's listening. If this really caught your attention, if you want to be that somebody else for this organization, do not hesitate and reach out to Michelle, or if you want to reach out to me, cause we're already hanging out on Instagram and I could reach out to Michelle, I'm happy to be the conduit. So thank you again, everyone. And until next Tuesday. I never do this, but I wanted to just share a conversation between Michelle and myself pertaining to her very specific experience in the Fertile Imagination to Networking Success group coaching program. Certainly, if you have any questions pertaining to being one of my Five mom founders this summer. So that this way in the fall, you are as confident and competent as Michelle is in distinguishing her organization versus anyone else. And the confidence that she had to reach out to the first IVF baby. If you want some of that confidence by this fall, go ahead and send me an email. Melissa dot Lorena at gmail. com or sign up for 15 minutes with me on my calendar. You can see all this information in the show notes right on your device. All right. Enjoy the conversation. It is really raw and candid, and I hope that it really answers any questions pertaining to what it would be like to partner with me and to have me as a mentor, I would love to have the conversation and I'd be honored to support you and your company. All righty, so Michelle wanted to have an understanding like when you were first or not even like what were you thinking at the time that you and I spoke pertaining to the program, like what were you trying to accomplish? How did you feel before deciding to go for fertile imagination to networking success? Right. I had really reached kind of a turning point in my work. I spent the first few years just getting the word out so we could get applicants and families to apply. And I did a lot of work on that. And, and now it was shifting to really trying to fundraise and grow our program. And so, you know, I knew that that wasn't necessarily my strongest suit, I can go find community and tell people about resources all day long, right? And I can do that. And that was like a very, although it took a lot of work, I was very easy for me to come up with. But now to flip it, it's, it's hard. And I'm not great at, I'm not great at it. Asking for money, and I'm not great at all these things, and I knew I had to do it, and I knew I had to network, and I knew I had to do everything, and it was also coming at a point where we really closed ourselves off during COVID, and that was because we were expecting a baby, and then we had a baby, and we didn't have a vaccine for him until he was almost two, and so we were really protective of him, and so not only had it been that I Was much more of an introvert and that a lot of those kind of crowds and everything stress me out and I had to really prepare for it and be on top of it. But then we had had this like long hibernation where hadn't done any of it. So it's kind of a skill that wasn't my best skill and then it was rusty. So I think that's really where I was at. I think the program came along and I just thought to me, it felt like one of those things that I thought would really help me a lot. And that. It would feel like one of those things, if I didn't do it, I would regret it. And so that was really, that was my thinking and how I was feeling going into it. That's so interesting. What, what made you think that if you didn't go into it at that moment, you would regret it? What, what kind of went into that? I think it was just, I didn't even really know where to start. And I think I just. I needed somebody who would work with me to develop a better plan. I needed some of that, like outside motivation that I wasn't, that I was lacking because it's hard when you're doing this day in and day out, especially when you are on your own, largely, it's hard to know, am I doing things the right way? Is this, what is this? And so. I think in talking with you, I was like, this is somebody who's going to push me out of my comfort zone. And I need that right now. And I wasn't getting that. In any other way, really, I was getting it sort of informally here and there, but it wasn't getting somebody who's going to like, be like, no, let's push you out of this comfort zone and everything. And so I really just wanted that. And I, and I knew I needed that. And so that was really where I thought if I Don't do this program. I don't know how I'm going to find somebody who's going to do that. And I don't know that I have it in me right now to do it for myself and really push myself. So before starting the program, what sort of doubts or uncertainties did you have about joining and then how did you overcome them? Yeah, I think it was, I think doubts are just, it's hard for me to invest in myself and hard for me to like, kind of take that step back. That time to say I'm working on myself, but it does have another goal. And also it, we should be invested in ourselves. And so I think that was really one of my biggest doubts. I didn't feel like in some other programs and things that I've looked at, I felt like I don't really know that this is going to be successful. I more felt like really, I was like this. I was like, Melissa is going to kick my butt a little bit and, and get me out of my comfort zone. And that was what I needed. And I knew that that's what I needed. So I think that was really where the, kind of the doubts settled it. Like, yes, they were there when I first started, they were still there a little bit. And then I think it was very quickly, it was like, Oh yeah, no, no, this is really what I needed was I needed that push. Yeah, and you know what? I think it's interesting. So your background like you're like a JD Like weren't you like were you a trial attorney? I was yeah okay, can I just put context here because the the assumption would be that a trial attorney would be like Crazy intense, totally like gunhole, super loud. I'm just kind of curious, like, like this was not you then, or was it simply because of all the emotions or what was it that? Yeah. Yeah. I think it was definitely the emotions. I think I was never super aggressive. I knew how to like turn it on for the little bit of the case, but I wasn't really super aggressive outside of court. And so I think it was kind of like, I didn't have that same platform of saying like, okay, in here, in this context, this is what I have to do. I didn't feel that same way. I think it was definitely the emotions, right? It's really, it's really hard in fundraising because I think there's this part of me that's like, what do you mean? You're not going to give money to my daughter. And I think that's a really hard position to be in where it's like. I have to separate that out and understand that it's, it's not the same emotional thing for most people who are going to encounter it. And so I think I needed that. I think it was also just tired, right? Like, I think fundraising is really tough. I think there was some things of growing up and just culturally is like, you're not supposed to ask other people for money, right? It's supposed to be, stay within the family, all of that. So I think it's a very foreign concept to me to ask for money and ask, And really ask for help. I mean, I think that that's something that was tough for me. Right. And so I think all of those things kind of Combined into this point where it was hard for me to, to, to do it and to think of how to do it. And fundraising is known for taking a really long time to come to fruition. And I was exhausted and, and I didn't know how to start. And that was the really big thing. So. So then what aspect, what aspects of the program set it apart from other experiences and how did those differences contribute to your success? I mean, I think the first thing is I had never really seen a program that fully integrated the fact of being a mom and what that took, as well as your work. And so I think it was just this, I was like, this quote always thinks of me as like, you're supposed to, in the same age, you're supposed to work like you don't have a kid and you're supposed to parent like you don't have a job, right? And that's not the reality. Right. They're both hand in hand, things that happen with your child affect work and things that happen with work affect your child. And so kind of that tug and pull, what I always liked was that you were very forthcoming of like, this is you working within all of your obligations and all of the things that are going to pull with, pull at you. And you were going to have to adjust things as, as it goes on. And so I think that was one of the biggest things that felt like Dad was saying, you want to be the best mom you can possibly be, and you also want to do the best job you can possibly do, and that is going to ebb and flow on both ends, depending on, you know, needs and what's going on, and that's okay. And then how can we do this? And so one of the things that I think was really good That I really appreciated always was how being with your kids was like a way to sort of work on your imagination and to sort of play with life and, and see it through their eyes. And that to me was really helpful because I think there was a lot of, if I, if I did all this stuff with my son, that was great. But then I was also thinking about all the stuff that I didn't do and vice versa. And so I think it was just very much being able to say like, Even spending time with our children, we are developing ourselves and, and really thinking and playing it out of it and getting out of our own heads, which I think was like one of the biggest benefits to the program was I was forced to get out of my own head, which is a dangerous place to stay in and, um. Yeah, I would agree I said that to myself yesterday. I was like get out of your head What is it in your head you're dead or something like that? Okay, so then the other question would be Okay, so is there a particular aspect of the program? So something specific that exceeded your expectations or significantly contributed to your growth and success I think the strategies of networking, not just being when you show up to an event, but doing a lot of the pre work, I just had never really thought of it. And I had looked at networking, uh, In the terms of like, you show up to this event. It's super awkward. Maybe you meet a few good people, but then there's not really a great, it's just awkward. And it's, you know, weird to do it. And instead to convert that into making some context saying, Hey, I'm going to be here at this. Let's connect all of that removed a lot of that awkwardness. And then I think that also, cool. The other thing was, like, helped with how do we follow up afterwards? I think it was so much easier when you had had some pre conversations to then do the follow up of you had a little bit of a dialogue already going into it, and then you had the dialogue at an event, and then you had afterwards, and so it was much more seamless, and for me, who has some of that inner dialogue and that imposter syndrome, everything, it then put me in a space where people We're already connecting with me and it wasn't me going in cold to an event and not knowing anybody not Having any sort of connection with anybody and I think that was a big difference, too Yeah, people were trying to give you hugs, which I'm not saying that we could promise hugs at all networking events, but They go. Wow, it's a really it's pretty intense. Okay, so then let's talk about results or achievements that you're most proud of Proud of. So how do you see them impacting your future endeavors? I mean, I have been making contacts and reaching out to people that I never would have thought to reach out to. And so we had had some success probably last year and a little bit before that with Some of the doctors that were from the hospital we delivered at and just being very gracious and very, we had a big fundraiser and the neonatologists were all coming up to me independently and saying like, we know, like how much good you're doing for our families. And that was huge, but I didn't really know how to like, start that connection, right? Like that connection started because we had been at that hospital. We had all these great relationships with social workers and they like helped us with all of that. But it didn't, I didn't really know how to do it. And instead it was like, okay, so how do you capitalize on those, you know, strategies for how you're on showing up on LinkedIn strategies for who you're looking to connect with and getting past sort of that. I mean, there's a lot of noise in this area and getting past that noise to say, okay, let's start thinking about who is the strategic person. To connect with and who is, and then also like defining our, our goals and setting them out and saying that I had never felt like I could say, this is my goal and not sound like I was. Being too salesy and instead saying, like, this is my goal and like, I want to work with people who believe in this mission to get me to that goal. So what would you say is like the boldest thing you said or did throughout our time together? So I will say that, so Elizabeth Carr, who is the first IVF baby born in the U. S., I have followed her on LinkedIn, and she's very much an advocate for reproductive rights, and we started an IVF line after the decision in Alabama, and all that we really wanted, I think one of the ways that we're going to combat this is for all of us to start telling our stories, and how IVF has helped us grow our families, I think that that's huge, and that's One of the first things that we can really do and so it just so happened that during infertility awareness week, which was about a month ago She posted something and orange is the color for infertility awareness And she said every year I remind myself that I don't have a lot of orange and I always mean to buy more orange And I don't and I just commented and said I would love to send you A t shirt that says IVF baby in adult sizes, and we have them in orange, and so she, like, said, yes, I would love to wear one, and so we sent her a shirt, and she has agreed that once she gets the shirt, she will wear it and post on social media, and I think it was just one of those things, right? It was just It kind of like came to me and I was like, you know what? The worst case is she can ignore it and it's not going to change anything of like what I'm doing. Right? And the best thing is she can do what ended up happening, which was like, yes, I'll do it. And here's my address. And how do we do that? And so I think that was probably one of the boldest. Things I've done, and then I think really just putting myself out there saying it. My goal is 50, 000 by the year, saying that to people and explaining why that was the case and what that was coming from. There wasn't an arbitrary number. It was a very well thought out plan and in terms of the numbers. And then This is what I want to do. And so how do I do that? That's amazing. Okay. So the first IVF baby now has a t shirt and it doesn't even stop there because now you establish that relationship. Okay. So final question. So if you were to recommend this program to someone considering investing in their personal or professional growth, what key insights or benefits would you share to help them make an informed decision? I would say that Melissa is a very, is very good at The balance of pushing you out of your comfort zone, but also telling you what you're doing is really that you're doing well and having those things. And I think that's a, that's a delicate balance. And I think you achieve that very well. And so, and then reframing things and really allowing yourself. We get so in the weeds about what we're doing and it's hard for us to regularly take ourselves out and look at the big picture. And I think that that is. Something that you forced us to do. I think also you really forced me to like, look at what my goals were and in a year, five years, 10 years, and then push me like, well, why couldn't it be this? And it was very different for me to think that way. And to not put in all of the, the normal judgments that come up like, Oh, we're never going to do this. We're never going to do that. That's not realistic. And just really say like, okay, what if that was your goal? And I think that was really helpful for me. I think creativity and imagination piece was really helpful. And I think learning from our kids, I mean, My God, like the stuff my son says and comes up with is, is hilarious and is really, it's amazing to see. I mean, he, yesterday we took him to the children's museum and we were in the elevator and there was a baby and I waved at the baby in the stroller and then he took that as a sign and he said, hi, it's me, Elliot. And I just kept thinking, oh my God, the boldness. Like I would never, like, I wouldn't think of saying that, but he was like, okay. And, and just the confidence of like, he knew it was, it's me, Elliot. Like, of course you should know who I am and that kind of thing. And those, and I just remember sort of really sitting there in that moment and kind of trying not to giggle because it was so adorable and cute and all that, but also thinking, you know, Hey, there's a big lesson to be learned here of the directness, the boldness, the he wasn't afraid, he wasn't thinking all the things of like, are they gonna think I'm annoying? Are they gonna, are they gonna judge me? Are they? And none of that mattered to him. And that's a huge lesson for all of us, how kids are, don't have that. And yet, because they don't have the time of like all the years of questioning and self doubt that have factored into us, and that that's something we can really learn from our kids. Yeah, and I think that's a lot of times when we lose sight of the fact that the, the source of information and insight almost doesn't matter in a way, right? Like here's this child teaching what this fancy smancy leadership guru could be teaching an executive at an organization, which is to be bold in your vision, right? Right. And, and be open to conversation with anyone at all. And I think in the program, that's something that I wanted to just really highlight, which was that we have imagination experts in residence right under our nose, and they always have these little sayings like, Oh, tell me your, your company vision. Like if I were a five year old, well, hello, a lot of us have like legit five year olds in our homes that we could filter some of this communications and messaging and we could just like. Get down to what really matters, which is simplicity and just making sure that we're talking to the right people and that we have what it takes to, to solve the challenges that we want to solve. So thank you so much, Michelle, for this. I'm so sorry. I was like, hijacking you. I'm like, Oh my God. No, it's fine. I'm like, Michelle still would be, but yes. Thank you. Thank you. Thank you. So yeah, this was fantastic. I will go ahead and pause it.
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230: How to Increase Mental Bandwidth: Mindful Maycember
Hello, fellow mom founders and corporate executives! Before we dive into today's episode, let me paint a picture for you: it's Maycember, and life is throwing everything it's got at us—projects, unexpected snafus, and plans shifting faster than we can keep up. But amidst this chaos, there's a beacon of hope: a way to navigate this month with more presence, less stress, and a whole lot more emotional and mental bandwidth. Today, we're going to explore how to increase your mental bandwidth through mindfulness, drawing from valuable insights and personal experiences. From the power of loving awareness to the neuroscience benefits of mindfulness, we'll uncover practical tools to help you thrive in both your personal and professional life. So, grab a cozy spot and let's dive in! Be sure to find me https://www.instagram.com/melissallarena/ First off, let's talk about the power of loving awareness. In our fast-paced culture, it's easy to get caught up in the hustle and bustle of trying to reach our goals. But what if, instead of constantly striving for the next thing, we practiced loving awareness? This means being fully present with what is, without judgment. This loving awareness is also a synonym for mindfulness and one way that has helped me increase my mental bandwidth is by training in and practicing meditating with the big idea of responding to what is with loving awareness. Ultimately, meditating in this context is about embracing the beauty of the present moment, even amidst the chaos of Maycember. Next, let's explore the concept of mindfulness as a tool for softening our approach with our kids, employees, even clients. As a second-generation New Yorker, I know firsthand the benefits of moving swiftly through city streets. But I also learned that this intense approach wasn't serving me well as a mom and sometimes as a coach/mentor. In business, when I am helping a mom founder do from timid to bold in her goals, and asks, there is always impostor syndrome that pops up, old stories, deep insecruties, emotional challenging moments. I have learned over the last 12-years that there is a time for tough love but also for compassion and empathy….what's I can bare….is different than what you can bare and sometimes you can bare more than me. That's when I decided to learn how to meditate and embrace mindfulness. By softening our approach and practicing mindfulness, we can cultivate a deeper sense of empathy and compassion for ourselves and those around us." Chances are we work with fellow working moms and everyone has their own situations they are working through to make it through this Maycember. And finally, let's consider the neuroscience benefits of mindfulness. Studies have shown that mindfulness practices can lead to increased resilience, stability, and the ability to concentrate. For me, this has been an incredible shift. Imagine that you are confronted with a highly stressful and high stakes decision. This is the norm for mom founders and corporate executives. Full stop. Chances are you will say one thing or decide one way if you are operating from a reactive point. Meanwhile, if you have mindfulness tools in your back pocket then you can use them even if it means taking the world's deepest breathe and then be able to thoughtfully respond to a touch situation and say a completely different thing and in a different tone that will be received favorably….ie. in a non-scathing way. I want to help you do that at work and home.So, by incorporating mindfulness into our daily lives, we can enhance our mental bandwidth and better navigate the challenges of Maycember. Now, let's talk about how mindfulness specifically benefits working moms in business. As a mom myself, I understand the unique challenges we face in balancing our professional and personal lives. Mindfulness offers us a powerful tool to manage stress, increase focus, and make better decisions. It helps us stay grounded in the present moment, even when our minds are racing with deadlines and responsibilities. By cultivating mindfulness, we can become more effective leaders, more empathetic colleagues, and ultimately, more fulfilled individuals. In fact, committing to becoming a meditation practitioner and getting certified in Tara Brach and Jack Kornfield's two-year program has transformed my life. It's made me a more patient mom, a better listener to my husband, and has helped me increase my emotional and mental bandwidth. And I want the same benefits and more for you. Join me for a LIVE Intro to Mindfulness Course, starting on May 20th at 7 pm CST. We'll meet for four sessions, each session focusing on a different aspect of mindfulness. But remember, this is a LIVE course and will not be recorded. Spots are limited, so don't wait!"Also, there is zero experience necessary with mindfulness nor do you need any privacy either – that's why we have a mute button! Go to Instagram @melissallarena and send me a DM today. Otherwise, email me at [email protected]. Let's embark on this journey together!" https://www.instagram.com/melissallarena/
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229: Zibby Owens, BLANK: Revealing Leadership Secrets Learned Through Motherhood: Lessons Business School Misses
What if your everyday mom moments could fill the pages of a book? What if motherhood has taught you leadership skills unmatched by any book or top-tier business school? What if the only thing holding you back from sharing your message with the world was simply not recognizing and appreciating your own value and the support others can offer once you do? These personal topics, especially if you're a bookworm or entrepreneurial mom, are discussed in today's episode with Zibby Owens, bestselling author of "Blank". Zibby is also the award-winning podcast host of "Moms Don't Have Time to Read Books" and the founder and CEO of Zibby Media. With four children and a Harvard Business School graduate, Zibby's journey is nothing short of inspiring. Check out her full bio below. In the meantime, don't forget to say hi on Instagram: https://www.instagram.com/melissallarena/ to let me know who else you'd like me to have as a guest. I love guest and topic ideas. This episode is sponsored by my book, "Fertile Imagination," A Guide for Stretching Every Mom's Superpower for Maximum Impact. In this episode, I realized that Zibby Owens possesses a fertile imagination, the ability to conceive of something that a mom may not have done before. I mean, how many moms do you know who, after a decade of being a stay-at-home mom, decide to disrupt entire industries? That's precisely what Zibby is doing, and that's why I was so inspired to have her on Unimaginable Wellness. Through my podcast and the guests featured in my book, I aim to showcase individuals who harness their imagination for good, making an impact that can reshape opportunities for their children and future generations. Helping moms ignite their imagination to solve meaningful problems is what truly ignites my passion. As your host, Melissa, I urge you to consider: Do you know what truly ignites you as a mom, a human, a woman? If not, and if you're unsure how to rediscover your interests, then "Fertile Imagination" is here to guide you. As a mom of three young boys, I've experienced the Groundhog Day feeling and the endless cycle of sibling squabbles. That's why I wrote "Fertile Imagination," to help readers like you embark on a journey of activating your imagination, listening to its whispers, and integrating what excites you into your daily life. So, whether it's Zibby's story or your own journey of exploration, "Fertile Imagination" is your roadmap to unlocking your inner powerhouse and designing a life aligned with your passions. This is an amazing conversation for you to absolutely take notes and maybe even look some stuff up because if you want to be an entrepreneur, Zibby does drop some nuggets of wisdom in terms of some tools you might want to consider. But at the same time, it's important to appreciate that Zibby was able to create and is still in the process of building an empire. She's authored several books based on everyday life moments that many moms, myself included, often overlook as potential sources of inspiration and revenue as entrepreneurs. There's undeniable value in our daily experiences, even if we don't always recognize it. My book, "Fertile Imagination," guides you in harnessing these moments that ignite your passion and shows you how to share, sell, or leverage them to make your maximum impact on the world. Visit http://www.melissallarena.com/fertileideas or fertileideas.com to grab a free chapter of "Fertile Imagination." Now, let's delve into the official bio of Zibby Owens. Official Bio Zibby Owens — like Pippa Jones — wears a lot of hats. She is the award-winning podcast host of Moms Don't Have Time to Read Books; founder and CEO of Zibby Media, which includes the publishing house Zibby Books, a book club, retreats, classes, and events; and is the proud owner of Zibby's Bookshop, an independent bookstore in Santa Monica. Her previous books include Bookends: A Memoir of Love, Loss, and Literature, children's book Princess Charming, and two anthologies that she edited. A frequent contributor to Good Morning America, Katie Couric Media, and other outlets, she is – most of all! – the mother of four fabulous kids ages 9 to 16 — and wife to Kyle Owens, founder of Morning Moon Productions. Follow her on Instagram and Substack where she tells it like it is. Learn More · https://www.zibbyowens.com · https://www.instagram.com/zibbyowens/ TRANSCRIPT How are you? I'm great. Thank you so much for having me. I'm so excited. So I just got through your book, Blank, and oh my goodness, talk about like the turns and tosses and like the silliness. It was really entertaining. And as someone that reads nonfiction, for the most part, I was like, Oh, wait a minute, I'm missing out. Thank you. Thank you so much. I appreciate it. I'm so curious, Zibby. I mean, I asked my listeners kind of what was on their mind, right? What did they want to learn about Zibby? Mom of four, someone that is disrupting the entire publishing industry. I mean, you're making us feel like rock stars. Let me just say any author out there. But what is it about Zibby? You that makes you so like inventive and innovative in terms of the way that you approach business, mom, life, and this book tour right now with blank. What is it about you? Where did you get that spark? That is a good question. I don't know where it came from, but I will say I like to have fun with anything I'm doing. So I feel like, for example, the book tour, which I'm calling the Zippyverse tour and going to all these stops and I have tour t shirts and friendship bracelets and sunglasses. The point of that is to make it feel fun for the end user. to make authors, to make myself an example of how an author could be treated as a rock star. I'm just like doing it myself. But also, I think most things that I'm doing are in response to something else. So this tour is in response to my last tour where I had a few stops, well one stop in particular, where literally two people showed up to an event and I'm like, I cannot have that happen again. So instead of just blindly walking into places, I decided to be more in control of it and have my own tour website and then have people so I can be aware of which events are doing well and which aren't and monitor my own marketing. So I guess the tour is an example of how I do most things, which is get a lot of data, figure out what works and what doesn't work, try something new, do something different, have fun, and see if it works or not. And it might not work, and if not, then I switch gears and try something else. And as to where it came from, I don't totally know. I think it's just who I am. I love it. I love it. And I think it's, it's so interesting because we physically met at Mom 2. 0, and I was just like smitten beyond belief. I was like, oh my god, just like, it's like you're like Shakira for us at this point. Also on tour. By the way, like you guys should parallel share tour buses and such you're living parallel lives. Right. But I was so excited that you were there and I thought it was really, really interesting that you were sharing your perspective on the publishing industry. And you just mentioned data. And I will say as someone who is excited about building a community of moms that have this like Fertile imagination, like really like expansive thinking approach to problem solving in their lives. I was thinking to myself. Okay. So what shifts are coming up? What do you know? Is there some sort of like magic eight ball in terms of what's happening in publishing? Based on your right now real time experience on this Zibby tour Is there any are there any shifts in publishing? I'm sure like During other times in this industry, there are different genres that, for whatever reason, have been rising to the top. Right? Like, romanticy is huge right now, and I look at some of these festivals I'm going to, and the lines for the fantasy authors are wrapped around them. So, um. The buildings. I mean, it's crazy. Why does that happen? I don't know. Like, why is, why did the rom com market take off right now? Not sure. Did anyone predict it? No. So what's coming after this? It's hard to say. I think that, People are looking more and more for escapes than more hard stuff. I mean, I love a good hard memoir that'll make me cry, I really do. But I think for the most part, life is so heavy that people Need an outlet and books are becoming that obviously, as you well know, TikTok and Instagram have changed how books are consumed and found and all of that, which is really interesting. So I'm definitely watching all of that really closely and I find it very interesting and always wondering like, what else can I be doing? Definitely have not mastered TikTok, so open to any. Anything, any suggestions, but the way that other people have adopted it and promoted books and have books and industries take off just points to the fact that sometimes you don't know where the next thing is going to come from, but the point is to be aware as it's coming. Everybody bemoans the state of the industry and will people stop reading and I find it incredibly encouraging that so many younger readers are just totally into these things and I, these types of books and it speaks overall to the need for community around books and connection and that's what books provide and having people um, It doesn't have to be books that are on the bestseller list. It can be books that are taking off on TikTok or that somebody you really respect likes or something like that. But there will always be that as a way to connect, which I think is great. And I think in terms of that idea of community, that is something that I secretly have always wanted to ask you, because I sense that the reason, or one of the reasons why Blank is doing so well right now, I mean, bestseller, is that because of the support that the community has been giving you, but then you've been nourishing this community too. And so I'm just curious, like any stories of like meeting people in person who are part of your community and how we can continue to help this book, like keep skyrocketing. Oh, that's so sweet. And yes, I think you're right in, in part. I mean, I have been doing the podcast, Moms Don't Have Time to Read Books, since 2018. And there are a lot of people who have sort of been on this crazy ride with me. I mean, in 2017, I went on social media for the first time. Like, I didn't even have an account. And I had been at home with my kids for 11 years, and I had been out of, I've just been out of it, even though prior to that I had been working in different things, marketing and writing, and I had ghostwritten a book and things like that. But. I had been out of it for a while, and as I've gotten back into it, I've done what I always do, which is sort of share from the heart and share the backstory and share my deepest feelings, which I've been doing since I was 14 and started writing for Seventeen magazine about like how I felt about my body and gaining weight and all of that. So I've been really open about like how excited I am when good things happen, how dejected I feel when like, years ago when I first lost the Webby Award. So now here I am like six years later and this year I won the Webby Award. So like there have been people who have been along the way. So for me, it's more a symbol of things than the award itself, although I'm very excited, but it's like My kids helped me that first year try to campaign and get their friends to vote and all that stuff and then they were there when I didn't win like comforting me and now this year I could tell them that like we won and they could all like hug me and now they're older and so anyway people I think are rooting for me because I've been really open and yes I help lots of other people but I love that I mean it helps me just as much but I love getting to know authors and talking to people and and and you Just because other people have helped me so much by sharing in their memoirs or their essays or whatever, I give back by doing the same thing and hope that it, you know, I'm paying it forward and that it helps other people. And I'm, I, I do think that my community has turned out to read blank and that makes me really, really happy. I think it's also a quick read. I think people are enjoying it and it's more, it's more fun. I think, I just think people are looking forward to it. Now for something like that, that's just a little more fun, and I totally agree with you in the sense that a lot of the moms around me, like I've noticed, there's like this like book club mentality. Either you're in a book club to like escape family life, and it's just like chit chat with girlfriends about like really random things. Or like a book club and you're an aspiring author. And like, you want to get in the minds of perspective readers. And so the escape society, I'm just going to like name them that. I wonder like, okay, like fact and fiction are so blurry right now. And I was reading blank and I couldn't help but think like. Does Zibby have like a secret Instagram where she's like going to open houses? So what's the secret there? What's fact? What's fiction? And, and I loved the book. It was very unexpected. Thank you. Yeah. I love going to open houses. I have gone to 8 million open houses. I always like pull the car over and pop in. It's something like the kids are like, I'll be like, open house. They'll be like, no. So I just love doing that. I love seeing, I love design. I love just seeing how people live their lives too. Like I, I don't know the fact that like people just open up their homes. It's amazing. So I do not have a secret Instagram account, but, but I do love open houses. So that part is absolutely true. That part. And then there were So many other moments in the book, and I'm not going to give any spoilers away, but there were so many moments that I was like, yep, that visual. I know it. I've seen it. Like, let's just talk about, for example, one, like the Benihana Onion Volcano, like it. Yeah. When you said that, or when I heard it in the book, because I have the audio version, I was like, yep, I know what that looks like. I know those volcanoes. And it's like one of those mom moments, like, should we get like a fire extinguisher kind of a thing? But where did you pull out these different sort of like visuals that were like, so quote unquote, gettable? I mean, that's my life as a mom, like, I, I mean, I, I am doing all these things, I am in it, like, I have four kids, like, this is my life, and it has been for a very long time, so, I'm just putting in all the things, they just come out, like, I'm, I wasn't like, oh, I need to be sure to put the Benny Hanna image in, in fact, I barely even remember where that is, but, It's, it's just like, I've been, I've seen that so many times, and I have, I could fill endless books with just the kid stuff, so I think that I've noticed as I write fiction, which is new for me, I mean, this type of process, I, I, things are coming out that I don't even know. I mean, I'm writing my next book now, and I have this huge outline, so I really just have to like, put the words in, like I've already figured out the whole story, and it's, I actually made it kind of a little less fun for myself, I think, because I already know everything, and now I just have to, like, write it and make it fun, but. Anyway, I started writing it with this detailed outline and like, I wrote 10, 000 words about something totally not even in the outline. Like where is this going? But it's like I had to, I invented this whole backstory. Point is like my subconscious kind of takes over, I think, or whatever happens. But fiction is something I don't totally understand how I'm doing it. But I know that it's like a mishmash of all these things that are in my brain, like a. Okay. The endless trips to Benihana and like the fact that my daughter's hydroflask like never fits in the car and like they pushed me out of the way to like get to the radio thing and I'm like always about to get crash my car like all those things are just my life that's just my day to day life so and I know I don't always post that stuff like on social media and in my newsletters like I'm very intentional about not including my kids and things that are too specific to them. Um, But that is my life. I mean, I post the glamorous parts and I post, I mean, I hope to, I hope, I hope I post like enough real stuff that people know, but I don't want to reveal personal things about the kids. So anyway, all to say, yes, I've been there many times. You have like best customer out of Benihana, right? So it's, yeah, totally like, okay, it was just hilarious to me. Like when that mention happened, cause I was just like, taken there immediately and then wanting teriyaki chicken. But anyway, that withstanding, you're actually making me hungry right now. I know it's, it's early, but like I could, I could have a turkey right now. So this, this, so this is something that I find really common with so many women that Have been either out of the workplace or they're like starting brand new. Like you just mentioned these tiny, regular, banal moments of motherhood. And what you managed to do, my interpretation of it is make it into a story, make it into something that matters to a reader and like engage the reader. Like, why is it that. In, in your situation, I assume like that that's enough for a story, enough to engage a reader. And I found so many other moms are like, but I have nothing to write about. And you can write a whole like 10, 000 word thing about that. Well, I think it's how much we value those stories. I think a lot of moms don't put worth into what they're learning, but we're learning lots of things every day as parents. I mean, I learned more from being a mom than through all my education and I've gone to lots of schools and da da da, but it's an on the job, constant learning, constant changing, like full body experience and no one can tell you how to do it and you can't study for it In that way, it's like a nightmare, right? You have to just, it's the most important thing in the world. And, you know, for people who like to prepare, there's not that much you can do that will actually help, right? Until you get to know what you have, what you're dealing with, the sleep books. Do they work? I don't know. I mean, I've read a lot of them. Did they help me? Not so much. So I think that as we are dealing with our kids, and learning and ingesting information. It's, it's information that others are ingesting in an equally unsure point of their lives. And by reflecting it back, I think we're reminding each other that none of us are in it alone, even though it can feel very isolating. I mean, a night at home, my kids are older now, like my youngest is now nine, but Like the the tantrum not ending at home at bedtime. I mean, I have felt like well, is this ever gonna end? Will this kid ever stop crying or will this child ever fall asleep or how am I ever going to get out of the situation? And There's nobody to call, like, it doesn't matter, you can't, so, anyway, it can feel very lonely and isolating and terrifying, but really we're, so many of us are going through similar things, so as long as we share it, it makes it, and add some humor to it, I think it will help get through those day to day moments that can feel really difficult. I agree. And I also think about my kids almost like imagination experts in residence. It's like, they help me imagine how a situation can be more fun. They help me imagine how I can like, lighten up. Mom, I've heard that before. Like they, they really do help me navigate the, the, the stuff that is impossible to just kind of navigate with just my thinking, rational brain. Right. Cause things don't always make sense. And, and what you mentioned right now, as far as motherhood and loneliness and just like solitude, that's how I felt when I was writing my book. And when I was reading your book, I was like, wait a minute, like, how is it like, I almost feel like we all need an outlet, like if we do embark on writing a book, right? And so maybe I haven't found one yet. And like, I need to go get one. But at this point, it's It's going on artist dates for me, so I'm all about like Julia Cameron's like idea of like going and doing fun things. So as you're on this Zibby tour, I'm just wondering like, do you have an outlet? Maybe one where you just kind of step it up in your enthusiasm and feel energized and things like that. Hmm. Outlets for me. I really enjoy design, like graphic design and all that and like Canva and creating things and I'm not good enough at it. Like it's very frustrating to me. I want to be and I keep trying, but I seem to, I know what looks good, but sometimes I don't know quite how to get there. So I have a lot of fun. Doing that and trying always to improve and also teaching myself new things like this morning for instance Like I had a bunch of files on Dropbox that I'm like, I need to get these files onto YouTube There must be a better way So like next thing, you know I'm like learning how to use Zapier and like trying to schedule zaps and I'm like, I don't even know what I'm doing I'm probably about to make a huge mistake. It ended up not totally working now I have to go back and figure it out But like Okay, that's fun for me. I, I, I just enjoy a challenge. And even if it's something as simple as that, so I realize that's not as lofty as Julia Cameron, but also I have so many things that I do. I mean, I have my podcast, which I have been doing daily for four plus years, and I still have tons of episodes each week because even though I've gone to three times a week, I had booked so many that, uh, the ones I'm doing now are coming out so late, which is ridiculous. Like, I really have to, now I might have to change it all again. But anyway, I have all these different things that I am constantly kind of multitasking. Doing the podcast or having a meeting about, like, the marketing of a particular book or helping another author or writing an essay or maybe I should do a gift guide for Mother's Day or like, I mean, like, I, I am always like that. So I feel like my life is one procrastination from something else all the time. But it sounds like productive procrastination, which I want to make a thing, like, I think, I think we need to celebrate productive procrastination, because if you have so many ideas in your mind, it's kind of like, all right, follow this thread and then go follow this other thread and something's going to work for sure. And. And I'm wondering, like, when it came to your own business and when it came to, I'm not sure if it was like a clean transition from podcasting to publishing, but when it came to your own business, how did you like follow the thread in terms of like brick by brick building out this Zibby verse, which is like, wow. I mean, I didn't try to start a Zibby verse. Like, I'm literally wearing a sweater today that says Evyverse, that these two amazing women, Susie and Andrea, who live in Minneapolis, who I've gotten to know, and I went, and they offered then when Blank came out, to your point, to like host me in their town and introduce me to all their friends. And I was like, I'll go to Minneapolis. So I went, and they gave me this fabulous event, and then they gave me this sweater as a gift that like a friend of theirs like sewed on. I mean, it's so nice. I, that was not the plan. Like, I really started out, to be perfectly honest, just trying to sell a book. I didn't have a platform. I wanted to write a book forever. I'd written, I'd ghost written a book. I'd had a novel rejected in my 20s and I wanted to get back to it. And I had a bunch of parenting essays I'd been writing. That I wanted to turn into a book and so I started a podcast and I just, I think I'm just good at taking something and growing it and turning it into something else or just seeing opportunities of what comes next or if somebody else suggests something like testing it out or trying it or like mulling it over and figuring out how I would do it and just trying. I mean, it was so frustrating at the beginning. I was like, okay, no one is ever going to download this podcast. I'm going to be stuck at 86 downloads an episode forever. And I was like, but you know what? I still love what I'm doing. So even if I only get 86 downloads an episode, I'm not going to stop. And even if I have like five different books rejected, I'm not going to stop. Like, this is what I want to do. I, I, I'm very persistent when it comes to things that I enjoy and that I feel like I'm on the right path, even if it's not being validated to me externally, so I'm just going to keep doing what I'm doing and see and that's how I've gotten here and The publishing, obviously, was a different level because it took a lot of investment and hiring and all of that. So I did a ton of research. It took me a couple years to decide to do it. Like, I thought about it for a while before I did it. I had lots of calls. I had, there, there is some method to the madness. But in the end, I just thought, what's the worst that happens? I try to start a publishing company to help authors and it fails. Still, still cool. So, that's sort of my attitude. What's the worst that's going to happen? Yeah, and I think, I think a lot of times we just like assume like the worst is like total demise, the end of, of all our finances and just like, it's very catastrophic, I think, or maybe it's just my anxiety or something, but I, I see that, I see that, and so right now, just to kind of like put it out there, as I think about it. Cool. My book, and I think about, okay, how can I bring together a community of moms who want to think expansively about what's possible for themselves, who want to use their skills in ways that have never been used by other moms around them before, like What would you suggest would be, like, my first step? Okay, so, developing a community. Well, you already are doing a community. You have a podcast. You wrote a book. I mean, you don't need You don't need my help. I should be asking you, like, what has worked for you? Seriously, you know, for me, what worked for me is really taking like activating my chutzpah, honestly, that is what has worked for me so far, like talking to people who I know the book will help feel empowered, like one of the people that read my book, for example, she's like, I felt like I was back in fourth grade when I read it. Fertile imagination, like that teacher who's like, you can do it. And a little bit like Navy seal ish too, but you know, more like the teacher that's kind and generous. And like, that is what I was going for. So I wanted to just like, put myself out there intentionally to your point. Right. So it was kind of like, okay, like, where are these moms who need this information and who are super educated too? And I think. That's like a tiny little nuance, but it's like, I don't know about you. I know you went to HBS, I went to Tuck. We have our MBAs and I can't say that doing a ZAP on Zapier was something we learned in our relative business schools. I'm just saying. Right. Do you know how to do zap since Zap, zap year? I know. I'm a zapper. Yeah. I zap. Yeah. Oh yeah. We zap. We zap. We zap a lot. I get my emails with all my little zaps and this is how Zapier saved me time, right? So yeah, I'm happy to go in there and like help you zap stuff. Yeah, I might need that after this call. For sure. For sure. But like, this is not what we were taught like in business school. It was more about like how to plug into an organization and how to lead and how to like look at P& Ls and stuff. And granted, of course, we have our respective PNLs, but I'm just wondering, like, what would you say is the most valuable thing that you've learned as an entrepreneur, like doing it here in your space that you think should be taught in a business school? That's a great question. Because yes, I did take these things in business school and they, did they help me? Right, exactly. Like, I mean, honestly, I think they should teach you that You can watch a quick YouTube tutorial about literally anything and teach yourself how to do it. That is how I started a podcast. I was like, Google, how to start a podcast. You know, how do I? I watch videos all the time. Like we got locked out of the car the other day and everyone's like, what should we do? And I was like, I'm sure there's a YouTube video about this. And like, there was. So, I think it's, it's knowing that like, there are so many experts in so many things that anything you want to do, there is a guide. And now it's easier than ever to take people's advice and have them teach you. I think being open to learning and innovating, and this is something we learned is, The ability to sort of shift gears and be, pay attention to market trends and da, da, da. Yeah, yeah, yeah. Like we learned that, but you know, I feel like my cases in business school were like operational challenges and, you know, the cranberry manufacturing and like, I was like, what? And like, then in like our one conversation or one class, it was called leadership about like all the ways that people led wrong. And, and so I think about that, but I'm also like, I don't want to ever lead as the professional only version of myself. Like, I've decided that the best way to lead is just to use myself, even if it's my mom's skills. in the workplace. Like, I feel like I lead as a mom and I feel like it has only made me a better leader and they don't talk about that at business school at all. There is something about like taking care of people and gathering people and the softer skills or moments. Like with my company, I decided like three days a week, we all, Like take a break and go and have a nice lunch together every week. That's what we do. It's part of our culture. It's just like what we do. And I have them to my home and we sit around my dining room table and have lunch. And it's so nice. And it's like, I want to take care of them. I want to my teammates, like my most important dinner guests, because that's what they are. They are so important. And why would you treat an employee any differently than that? Like, if you don't want to have them. If you don't feel like they deserve that, they probably then should not be working for you. Do you know what I mean? So, and, and leaving, like I leave every day at 2. 30 and go pick up my kids. And I get it all done the rest of the day, but like, do I need to be in the office? So I just think there are so many things we could have learned about there are ways to make it work and finding flexible environments and leading by example and Making it work. And, and then I guess just always, like, I think that businesses, leading a business is like raising a kid in that as soon as you feel like you have it down, everything changes. Right? I got it. And now, suddenly, they're a year older and I don't know what I'm doing again. And none of the clothes fit. Like, I have to start again? Are you kidding me? And that's what it's like in business. Like, things are constantly changing. Oh, okay, maybe it's an external change that's impacting the organization. Maybe it's an internal growth change. But we have to be ready to, like, run to the gap and get new clothes. It's so funny. I was just telling a client yesterday that using your imagination is like the perfect change management tool. Like, I mean, so many people that have businesses are able to just go from one thing to another quite quickly, just really edit, change, refocus, and then, and then not feel like, kind of like, I don't know, maybe it's just me. Like for me, I would kind of feel like men. I did it wrong. Embarrassed. Like I was going this way and now I'm like, no longer doing this thing. What people are going to think. And so I think that's something else that stops you. And the same could be said when you're at a target and your kids have a meltdown and you have a choice, be the mom that you intended to be in front of other people or care what they think. And then be that another kind of mom. It's. The parallels are striking between motherhood and entrepreneurship for sure. So on that point, I'm just curious, like, can we name the superpower that you got from being a mom that you apply in business? What, what would you name that superpower? Being humble. 100%. The superpower is the ability to constantly learn and change. Honestly, I mean, you have to constantly adapt to changing conditions as a mom. So adaptability. Yeah, I think constantly being able to adaptability. Yeah. Regroup to do lots of things at once and to deal with things that are ultimately out of your control even when you care Yeah, and that's when it's like the hardest, right? It's like when it's your heart when it's your name when it's the Zibby verse, right? It's different than if it were this third party entity and I think I think we can, we can close the conversation there because I think right now a lot of listeners are probably wondering to themselves like, holy cow, maybe there is value in my like super regular mom life moments. Maybe I could write a story, right? Much value, so much value, so much value. And I think now the onus might be on people that have these like MBAs and things to put that value in like an income statement, like goodwill, at least, right? Like just like find a place. To, to demonstrate that we, if we use the success markers of the world, like finances and money and all that, like, how, how can we translate that to like real income financial security for moms? I mean, I think, I think the value is huge. And so my hope, my intention is through your story, Zibby, through this conversation that anyone listening feels like, what? Heck yeah, I matter. I matter. And I think that's so true. Thank you so, so much, Zibby. This was amazing. Where can people buy your book? Blank. Yes. Please buy blank. You can buy it literally anywhere. Go to your local independent bookstore, order it online. My website is zibbyowens. com. You can, there are links to lots of places to buy it there. You can get a signed copy at Zibby's bookshop through my website. You can. Get it, I don't know, wherever you get books or you can listen or you can read it on Kindle or whatever and you can follow me on Instagram at Zibby Owens or and or my sub stack zibbyowens. substack. com and you know, I tell it like it is. Absolutely. Thank you again, Zibby. Thank you. Here are the three things that I would love for you to just really reflect upon after this wonderful conversation with Zibby Owens. Point number one, if you are a mom, even if you have not, I don't even know, use social media for the last decade, I want you to realize that it doesn't matter. Everything that you want to know about launching a business, you can just Google it, you could even use AI. to help you get started. There is no reason not to explore your entrepreneurial muscles. Absolutely zero reason. So Google it. If you want to build an empire, launch a community or write your own book. Point number two, We underappreciate ourselves. Let's just imagine what it takes in order to run a house. Imagine what it takes to raise a wonderful human who is going to contribute to society after we leave this planet. There's so much value in what a mom does and no, we do not need to see that value demonstrated in the bank account in order to appreciate it. You have value that I promise you can absolutely change the world, but we need bravery. That might be what's missing. Bravery. Just be brave to demonstrate to the world that you can do A, B, or C. Be brave to actually start taking the steps and figuring out how you want to express your skills and talents with the world. And realize that whatever it is that you're doing at home, someone else is paying someone to do that too. Please be aware. So. Underappreciating what you're doing at home, even if it feels like it's, you know, what every mom would do, of course, is, is something that needs to be re evaluated because you have so much value, and I think it's very obvious in the conversation we had here between myself and Zibby. Point number three. So here's a very big call to action. If you went to a business school anywhere in the world, right, I would invite you to actually speak to a dean and ask that person, whoever they are, if they're open to having you teach a class, maybe on how to be a humble leader, maybe on how to be Empathetic as a leader, maybe on how to really, um, be a more nurturing leader. These are the skills that you already have built in, in terms of being a mom. And these are skills that you can a hundred percent teach at a business school, and I would invite you to have that conversation with a Dean. As a matter of fact, I plan to do that myself. And so there you go. That is my action item. Other than that, be sure to buy Zibby's book, Blank. It is available everywhere that you would ordinarily shop for books. Also buy my book, Fertile Imagination. Imagine double fisting two books by moms who might not have time to read a lot of books, but made the time to write books. And I would encourage you to think about your own life experience as worthy of filling the pages of any book. Thank you again. Next episode drops on Tuesday. Make sure that you follow Unimaginable Wellness.
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228: 3 Time and Money Traps Mom Founders Must Dodge!
Attention, mom founders! With summer on the horizon and the impending chaos of kids being out of school, there's no better time to reclaim control over your precious time and accelerate your business growth. In this episode, Melissa dives deep into three common time wasters holding mom entrepreneurs back from reaching their full potential. But fear not, because she also provides actionable strategies to replace these obstacles with productivity and profit. Say hi, I want to know if you agree or vehemently disagree with these three? https://www.instagram.com/melissallarena/ Time Waster #1: Second-Guessing Yourself It's time to kick self-doubt to the curb! Melissa shares valuable insights into overcoming the hesitation that often holds mom founders back from reaching out to potential leads and seizing opportunities. Learn how setting a timer and taking decisive action can transform your approach to networking and business growth. Time Waster #2: Fixating on Gender Disparities in Funding Don't let the fact or myth of effortless funding for male entrepreneurs discourage you! This is huge! Use your finite time focused on getting after it! Find the people who will be more likely to listen rather than waste one second on imagining who is not going to listen to you! Melissa encourages mom founders to channel their imaginative prowess into seeking mentors, partners, and opportunities for growth. Discover how embracing proactive networking strategies can empower you to break free from limiting beliefs and achieve your goals. Time Waster #3: Spreading Yourself Too Thin Are you juggling too many activities, diluting your focus and impact? Melissa highlights the importance of prioritizing strategic endeavors over scattered efforts. Learn how to refocus your energy on key initiatives and leverage targeted outreach to accelerate your business growth. VIP Networking Day Opportunity: Take Action Now! Ready to supercharge your networking efforts and achieve tangible results? Melissa introduces a limited-time opportunity for mom founders to participate in a VIP networking day. During this intensive three-hour Zoom session, you'll receive personalized guidance and hands-on support to execute your outreach strategies in real time. How to Secure Your Spot: Act Fast! With only two spots available, time is of the essence! Don't miss out on this exclusive opportunity to level up your networking game and propel your business forward. Sign up for a 15-minute Zoom call with Melissa within the next 72 hours to explore the details of the VIP networking day and secure your spot at the special rate. Remember, the clock is ticking, so act now to seize this opportunity for accelerated growth and success as a mom founder! Contact Information: For more information or to schedule your 15-minute Zoom call, sign-up here: https://go.oncehub.com/ClientSessionMelissaLlarena . Let's make this summer your most productive season yet! TRANSCRIPT Three time wasters for mom founders and how to replace that time with more productive activities. I don't know about you, but I have three children. I am looking at the summer season and I cannot say that I'm going to have more time to devote to my business and my practice where I'm teaching mom founders like you to leverage the art of strategic networking for profit. So what I have to do every single season right before is really map out The most optimal use of my day hours. So I wanted to give you a sense for some of the things I've noticed, some patterns I've noticed when I've been coaching mom leaders throughout these last 12 years. So here's the first time waster that I have noticed that are stealing money straight out of your pockets. Okay. So time waster number one, second, guessing yourself. I'm just going to say it like it is. You are having sex with your self doubts, and apparently it seems to be something that feels very good because we do it quite often, and I include myself in this as well. Oftentimes, it is hard to really almost take the wheel back of our days when it is us who is captivated by This idea that no, I don't know how to sell myself or no, I shouldn't talk to that person because I don't have a warm intro and what happens is essentially you're just there stuck looking at a long list of human beings that most likely will want their problems solved. Buy the person that's gonna call them and you do nothing you do nothing and the reason why I share this is because I was talking to a mom founder for example she literally has warm leads in her linked in right now we're talking about people. Who have raised their hands and said to this person that they want to connect with her and potentially they want to do business with her. Certainly they would like to make money with her. And yet there's this hesitation. There is this hesitation to do the deed and reach out to people that are. Literally warm leads in your LinkedIn platform. And that is a time waster. This idea that we're looking at something multiple times in a day and wondering to ourselves, should I do it? Can I do it? How will I do it rather than starting to take the steps necessary to actually reach out to those people and follow up with every single one. So I wanted to just share a potential solution. This is going to sound so obvious, but I want you to actually take action on this one. I invite you to set a timer. It could be 20 minutes. We could consider the Pomodoro process where it's like 20 minute increments and then some breaks. Set a timer and get that list of warm leads in your LinkedIn platform done. It sounds simple. It totally does. But I want you to ask yourself, like, why haven't you done it yet? Like if you actually have people, again, who have raised their hands in your LinkedIn said, I want to do business with you. Certainly at minimum, I would like to make money with you. Why have you not actually gone and done this follow up? Right? So that's the first point. Second, guessing yourself. It is often very, very enticing, very, very alluring to just think about thinking about and thinking about thinking about. And I've noticed this so, so often, especially with a lot of mom founders who are hella educated. Because I think we had the luxury when we were in business school or law school in grad school to really reconsider and re argue and recreate and reinvent the wheel where right now the market moves quite quickly. And I don't think we have that luxury as a mom founder, you don't have that luxury unless you have a lot more time than me, then my God, please. Tell me, how do you have more time? So that's the first point. Here's a second time waster for mom founders. And again, how you might want to replace that time with more productive activities. So there's this idea and I hear this time again, and it frustrates me just because there have been so many opportunities and moments in my life where I could have said the same thing. And even had the same thoughts. Here's this idea. The idea that you are not getting investment dollars as easily as men who can at minimum just spit an idea on a napkin and somehow magically conjure up millions of dollars in investments. I want to ask you for real, for real, how does having that thought help you? Now, if you need that chip on your shoulder, if it drives you crazy and it makes you fight harder than amazing, but if you're wasting your already stretched out mental bandwidth on using this excuse or thinking about it, Then, again, you are wasting your time. You really, really, really are. And I believe that as moms, our superpower is having a fertile imagination. Just the other day, I was interviewing one of the most influential people in the book industry, Zibi Owens. And her imagination is wild and amazing and wonderful. And so she's building out her business. Now if she had to just think to herself, my goodness, all these guys that are at the helm of leadership and other organizations, they have it so easy. Maybe I know from the people with whom I've interacted, let me not even try. Then I just can't imagine that she would be one of the most influential people in publishing. I just can't see it. Instead of thinking about that idea, that whole, like, drawing a napkin on the table. It must be so easy for a guy. Instead of that, why don't you find a guy, quote unquote, it doesn't even matter if they are a guy. Why don't you find a person that you believe literally just drew on a napkin and sold their idea for millions of dollars and ask that person to mentor you. You're going to think that is wild and crazy, but you know what? I've done similar things in the past and I've approached strangers in libraries. If you're one of those strangers in the libraries, yes, it's me. And I have absolutely figured out a way to build rapport with strangers, connect with them, turn them into connections. And also add value by my way as well, not just me taking from their insights and wisdom. And so again, if this is your thought, okay, great. How can we leverage that idea in your favor and take action? So you stop wasting your mental energy unless you have extra energy. I don't know. I don't know. There are some moms that have like A lot of energy, but I just want to invite you to imagine this idea that you can actually step up to a person that you think just drew on a napkin and got millions of dollars, and you could just ask them to teach you how to draw. You could go to a supermarket, buy a whole, Oodle of napkins and just start drawing like a mofo. And let's see what comes up for you. Certainly something will come up. That's going to be more productive than just thinking in your mind that I wish I were a single guy. Okay. That's the second time guzzler third one for mom founders. And again, how to replace this time guzzler or waster with more productive activities. So spreading yourself and your efforts across a wide array of activities. And I want to be really nuanced here, specifically doing this, spreading yourself across a wide array of activities, because that one activity, that one activity that you originally were thinking about doing, because you knew in the heart of hearts that that activity would turn around your business, such as having B2B conversations. Whereas in years before you've only had. B2C conversations, right, where that one game changing, I've never done it before idea started to get hard because you were actually starting to take the steps and doing that big, crazy, unnatural for you idea. Let me be super clear when I say that. So let's just imagine. That you have always sold to individuals. You have an organization. You've always sold to individuals your product. And now you're trying to gain distribution at big box stores. Let's just imagine. And you know, like, okay, like if I crack that code, then I'm going to make a Real progress towards my dreams. Then I'm going to have a business that is like a really kick ass amazing business here. Right. And so that idea, it sounds wonderful. Like a fantasy. It sounds amazing. Like a goal. It sounds amazing. Like even a napkin drawing, but then once you start taking steps and you hear rejections, or you're not getting callbacks or. People are questioning, well, how many units have you sold? And what is the, what was it? I remember when I worked at Procter Gamble, the whole like shelf, uh, velocity, right? Like how quickly can it fly off the shelf idea? When those numbers just don't land in terms of the ones that you offer to the person that is in charge of distribution, like that is when all of a sudden you'll say to yourself, you know what? Let me just do more of B2C. Let me just do more of B2C in all these different ways. Let me just do anything other than this brand new thing that I set out to do. And that is where you start to lose focus and the impact that you can have on your business really is diluted for sure. So what would be the best way to actually replace that time waster with something that is a lot more productive? So something that will be a lot more productive is to go back to the original strategy and find someone who executed precisely on that strategy, maybe ask them to mentor you, ask them for templates, pay for their templates, hire them as a coach, and do it in differently, right? So if whatever it is that you're doing is not producing the results that you imagine, that's one side of it. The other side of it must be or could be that the sales cycle is going to be longer. And so that's the other side of it. So if you intend to actually make some progress in that way, it's important to just go back to the drawing board, but not like erasing the whiteboard, but go back to what you originally intended to do, what you know in your heart to work. Okay. And figure out how to crack that nut or code or whatever it is that you're selling or trying to accomplish. If you are living any of these three time wasters, right? And let's just imagine that your cash runway is running out. Then I want to invite you to imagine this scenario. This is a crazy idea that I am so excited about. Because This is how I support my mom founder clients. So picture it. Yes, we are going to Sophia Protillo from the Golden Girls. That's what she used to say. Picture this. A power packed three hour zoom session right from the comfort of your home. We do it over zoom. So you don't have to sacrifice time from your business or your family. And during this intensive session, I am your guide. We literally hop on zoom, share screens and start diving into the trenches together, reaching out to potential investors, maybe podcast guests or partners or media giants in real time. So you know that list of warm leads? Yeah, we're going to execute on it real time together so that this way your spirit and my spirit are co creating some happy flow of progress. And we are not stopping to let you think over, think, rethink, or re imagine. So, This idea of a three hour session with me, it is called a VIP day. It is a VIP day that you will be very prepared for because I'll provide a questionnaire up front. You will have an opportunity to really think through. How we will leverage every single minute, because every single minute counts for a mom founder world, we'll have the opportunity to, again, before we hop on that three hour call, I will know what your business goals are, your target investors, or potential podcast guests and partners or media contacts, right? And also what challenges you are facing, whether they are more mindset or strategic or tactical, right? And we're just going to be making sure that those three hours together are maximized, just totally maximize. Then real time. Live on zoom. It's just about action. We're going to roll up our sleeves and dive into the heart of Networking reaching out following up doing everything that feels hard to do when you're by yourself Because you don't have someone telling you like do the work It's not like you have this boss, right? And we're gonna actually implement everything that I just shared with you as far as execution in real time So we're gonna leverage some of the insights from your pre work We're gonna identify the people as I said all on the spot And you're going to see firsthand how you can actually craft some compelling outreach messages and make meaningful connections that matter. And it does not have to mean you are being stopped or paused by gatekeepers. That is actually what makes my process different. I don't actually engage with gatekeepers. Fun fact. All right. So. Again, a lot of this outreach tends to be so daunting, especially when you're doing something new, exploring a new strategy. But with my guidance, you're going to get it done. I mean, whether it's through email, LinkedIn or another channel, you're going to have a clear plan of action and you're going to have a ton of confidence to execute this real time. Okay, so I think it's so important. Also, follow up. I know a lot of times, of course, like one point out, one reach out, one email is not going to be get you all these results immediately. Although, for a client, it only took an hour for her to get On the calendar of someone in an insurance company, but let's just imagine we're reaching out to 50 people, a hundred people, and some will not get back to you within that three hour timeframe. So I'm going to make sure that you know how to follow up with the individuals that we reached out to during that three hour, let's just call it sprint. So at the end of this VIP networking day, you're going to feel empowered. energize, and you're going to be totally unstoppable. I think it's so urgent right before the summer lets out that you have optimized your time in terms of outreach efforts, that you have absolutely done as much as possible to put the ball in your court so that things start moving towards the direction of your biggest ambitions. And I can help you there. Now, I want to be really, really clear. I have a special rate for this VIP networking day for members of my podcast community, and I will happily share with you what that rate is during a 15 minute. Zoom call with me, because I need to get to know you. I want you to get to know me and we need to like have a certain vibe so that I know that you will get the results that you deserve. Right? So I'm going to put that link into the show notes. You will be able to sign up for the 15 minute call with me so that we could hop on zoom, go through the details of this VIP day. But here's what I neglected to mention this very moment. To lock in the special rate that I do have for you, my dear listeners, you're gonna have to secure your spot in the next 72 hours. What? Yes, 72 hours because I want to know that you are decisive. I want to know that you are ready to work real time, not delay, not overthink, not get ready to get ready. This is about action takers, right? So in the next 72 hours, go over to the link in my show notes, which you can see on the device where you're listening to this conversation and sign up for 15 minutes with me. Within the next 72 hours, now, I will share with you the details during that call. We will get to know each other during that call and you can make a decision on that call. You do not, to be clear, you do not need to have the actual VIP day. In the next 72 hours, the VIP day must happen by May 22nd, May 22nd is May 22nd, a magic date. It is not, but I am a mom founder too, and that is the last day of school for my three boys. So I want to make sure that I can 100 percent focus on you. And that is why we must get this accomplished by May 22nd. So. Go ahead into the show notes and be sure to sign up for the 15 minute session. So you have a good idea of precisely what you would be getting into. If you were to secure your spot, I only have three spots. That is it. That is all I'm doing in terms of the VIP networking day. So three hours with me, we're focused on those warm leads that have been hanging out in your LinkedIn. Or we would be focused on going after those B2B clients that you feel like. Intimidated about, or we will go after the podcast guests or partners with whom you'd like to make more money. And so that is what we will do all about action. And honestly, the clock is ticking, so I encourage you to act very, very quickly. Three spots must talk to me within the next 72 hours, and the VIP day must happen by May 22nd. So, that is an option available to you, my dear podcast community listener. Now, if for whatever reason you're not able to go to the show notes, You can email me melissa. larina at gmail. com m e l i s s a dot l l a r e n a at gmail. com. Again, this will be in the show notes. Here's what I want to say, here's what sets me apart in terms of as a coach to mom founders. So I, as I said earlier, I totally skip gatekeepers. And I know that it might feel a little eclectic, a little direct, a little, Oh my God, who does she think she is? But here's the reality of the matter. I always aim to get on the shortest supermarket line. Okay, hear me out. So I have several strategies that I have leveraged in order to bring the guests that I have on my podcast, whether it's been Beth Comstock, the former CMO of GE or Gary Vee, who has millions of people. Knocking at his digital door. I have absolutely never found a situation where I am working through someone to get to someone to get to someone else. It's been direct, I have not had a PR agency, and it's worked for me, a mom founder with three kids. So I want to teach you how to do the same exact thing so that this way, this summer, you already have a lot of hot irons out there in the fire, right? That are out there and can absolutely produce the results you need when the time comes, whether in the summer or in September, when you have full focus of your business and what you want to accomplish next. Okay. So I want to leave it there. I also want to say that You can email me melissa. larina at gmail. com. If you are an entrepreneur or you are an investor, you're absolutely welcome to have a conversation with me. If you are looking to tackle another list or another outreach effort in this very way. I am not going to offer this VIP day for someone that is not a mom, because what I know to be true is that a lot of times we have had to, as moms, pause our careers, slow down our efforts or downshift what we've been doing in the world of work. And I want to help moms very specifically fast track their success. So this way you could have the right conversations, you can get into the right rooms and you could absolutely have the success that you deserve and that you're deserving. children would want you to have two. Could you imagine that? Could you imagine, could you imagine, just imagine for a second, your child seeing you on that three hour zoom call, right? Like from a distance, let's say they're having a snack and they're with a childcare provider with your partner, or they're being entertained in some way. And they're seeing mommy. Get it done. They're seeing mommy like on zoom, just like zooming through a list. They're seeing mommy like show up for herself, right? They're seeing mommy not waste time by second guessing herself, because here's the reality. Our kids think that we're like amazing sometimes. Imagine if you felt the same way. Imagine if you actually believed that you were as amazing as your kids see you. Imagine that. Yeah. So let's kind of Melissa dot Lorena at gmail. com and me, but go to the show notes and be sure to sign up for the time. Alrighty. Enjoy the rest of the day. Next week we're going to have Zibi Owens, again, one of the most influential people in the publishing industry in New York on the podcast. We're going to go over so many things that are unexpected, including how having an MBA versus being a mom. Compare and contrast, right? What are some leadership skills that we have learned as moms that we did not learn in our Ivy League MBA educations? I think you're going to absolutely enjoy that conversations. It is amazing and we really get to it. So have a wonderful day and do not hesitate to reach out to me. I actually want to hear from you because I want to know How I can support you, I have seen way too many mom founders second guessing themselves, assuming that they're not, you know, worthy of success and really self sabotaging your own progress. And I want to help you stop that so that this way everyone can be happier. Thank you very much.
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227: Empathy Expert Michael Tennant Discusses The Transformative Power of Empathy in Business and Family Life
Have you ever stopped to consider the significant role empathy plays not only in our personal lives, but also in our professional environment? That's exactly what we did in our recent conversation with Michael Tennant, the founder and CEO of Curiosity Lab. Michael, a new dad, shared with us his deep respect for his wife and all mothers, and how becoming a parent has forced him to remain present and lead with empathy. We explored how empathy can be a secret weapon for anyone - be it moms, founders, entrepreneurs, or creators - and how it can shape healthier, happier lives. Our exploration into the world of empathy didn't just end there. We dug deeper into our emotional understanding. You know those butterflies you feel in your stomach when you're nervous or that lump in your throat when you're sad? We discussed how our bodies physically respond to our emotions and how we can mindfully navigate these sensations. We also delved into the five core emotions - joy, fear, anger, shame, and sadness - and the three types of empathy - cognitive, somatic, and emotional. We learn that all these are here to keep us safe and, with a touch of practical exercises, we can use them to make intentional choices in our interactions with others. This episode is brought to you by Fertile Imagination: A Guide For Stretching Every Mom's Superpower For Maximum Impact – My book is now available on Amazon in its audiobook format, paperback version and Kindle format. Grab a free chapter on www.fertileideas.com. DM me on Instagram @melissallarena just type the word FERTILE and I'll share the link if that's easier to get to fertileideas.com for all the details you need to celebrate your own Fertile Imagination! Here's that link: https://www.instagram.com/melissallarena/ About Michael Tennant Michael Tennant is the CEO of Curiosity Lab, a purpose-driven venture studio and consultancy that aims to make empathy easy and accessible to learn and teach. He is also the author of the book "The Power of Empathy," a 30-day guide that walks readers through the five phases of empathy. Through Curiosity Lab, Tennant creates and incubates businesses that help values-aligned individuals and organizations use empathy to live happier and healthier lives and to nurture productive and inclusive environments. He also teaches empathy to various organizations, schools, government and non-profit organizations, including NASA. Tennant's approach to empathy has been shaped by personal loss and he advocates for greater emotional proficiency to deal with challenging moments and to foster connection. His innovative approach has led to his company receiving an investment from Pharrell and the Black Ambition Prize in 2022. Let's face it - balancing motherhood and business isn't just hard, it's a superpower. Join us as we navigate through this enlightening journey of understanding empathy, emotions, and more. Share your thoughts and let's explore together. In this episode, you will hear: Michael's leadership has steered the organization towards nurturing businesses that are not only empathetic but also align with individual and organizational values. His book, "The Power of Empathy" is structured as a 30-day guide, aiming to simplify the concept of empathy and make it accessible. The book takes readers through a comprehensive journey of understanding empathy, breaking it down into five phases. This approach provides a clear and easy-to-follow structure for those looking to improve their empathy skills. Curiosity Lab aims to utilize empathy as a means to enhance various aspects of life and work. They believe that empathy can improve happiness, health, productivity, and inclusivity. Tennant's collaboration with NASA, demonstrating the broad reach and relevance of his empathy training initiatives How Tennant's personal experiences, particularly his own losses, have significantly influenced his perspective on empathy – Empathy can not only be a personal skill but also a viable business strategy. A major part of Tennant's advocacy revolves around promoting emotional proficiency to help individuals navigate difficult situations and foster stronger connections. How empathy plays a crucial role in creating productive and inclusive environments – Michael champions empathy as a necessary tool in building harmonious and effective workspaces. One of the notable investors in Michael's company is the renowned artist Pharrell. This suggests that his work has resonance and appeal across different sectors, including entertainment. In 2022, Curiosity Lab was honored with the Black Ambition Prize. This recognition is a testament to the studio's purpose-driven work and innovative approach to empathy. Curiosity Lab and Michael's innovative approach to empathy have earned recognition and awards. This affirms the significance and impact of their work in promoting empathy. SHARE this episode with shared with entrepreneurs and business leaders seeking to enhance their understanding and application of empathy in various aspects of life. Supporting Resources: Curiosity Lab "The Power of Empathy" - https://www.amazon.com/Power-Empathy-Thirty-Day-Personal-Growth/dp/1797220276 Subscribe and Review Have you subscribed to my podcast for new moms who are entrepreneurs, founders, and creators? I'd love for you to subscribe if you haven't yet. I'd love it even more if you could drop a review or 5-star rating over on Apple Podcasts. Simply select "Ratings and Reviews" and "Write a Review" then a quick line with your favorite part of the episode. It only takes a second and it helps spread the word about the podcast for writer moms. About Fertile Imagination – www.fertileideas.com You can be a great mom without giving up, shrinking, or hiding your dreams. There's flexibility in how you pursue anything – your role, your lifestyle, and your personal and professional goals. The limitations on your dreams are waiting to be shattered. It's time to see and seize what's beyond your gaze. Let's bridge your childhood daydreams with your grown-up realities. Imagine skipping with your kids along any path – you, surpassing your milestones while your kids are reaching theirs. There's only one superpower versatile enough to stretch your thinking beyond what's been done before: a Fertile Imagination. It's like kryptonite for impostor syndrome and feeling stuck when it's alert! In Fertile Imagination, you will awaken your sleeping source of creative solutions. If you can wake up a toddler or a groggy middle schooler, then together with the stories in this book – featuring 25 guests from my podcast Unimaginable Wellness, proven tools, and personal anecdotes – we will wake up your former playmate: your imagination! Advance Praise "You'll find reality-based strategies for imagining your own imperfect, fulfilling life in this book!" —MARTHA HENNESSEY, former NH State Senator "Melissa invites the reader into a personal and deep journey about topics that are crucially important to uncover what would make a mom (and dad too) truly happy to work on...even after the kids are in bed." —KEN HONDA, best-selling author of Happy Money "This book is a great purchase for moms in every stage of life. Melissa is like a great friend, honest and wise and funny, telling you about her life and asking you to reflect on yours." —MAUREEN TURNER CAREY, librarian in Austin, TX
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226: Unmasking Imposter Syndrome: The Hidden Costs for Mom Founders
In this episode, you'll delve into the insidious impact of imposter syndrome on mom entrepreneurs. Discover the toll it takes on your confidence, time, and financial opportunities, and learn why confronting it head-on is crucial. I emphasize the necessity of breaking free from societal norms and embracing expansive thinking, a key component of your journey with my Imagination to Impact to Income Method™. We'll explore the risks of not addressing impostor syndrome, especially regarding missed networking opportunities and stalled career growth. Through a strategic blend of personal anecdotes and actionable steps, I offer you a roadmap for overcoming imposter syndrome and maximizing your networking potential. Plus, I'll highlight the urgency of seizing the opportunity to enroll in my "Fertile Imagination to Instant Access" masterclass, available now at a beta rate with limited spots remaining. You're encouraged to sign up for a 30-minute breakthrough session www.melissallarena.com/sessions with me to explore how the masterclass can transform your life and propel you towards success. Let's rewrite the narrative of your success story together and step boldly into your greatness. Free Resource: From Contact to Connection: The Go First Networking & Follow-Up Playbook for Mom Entrepreneurs SIGN-UP for playbook: https://bit.ly/hypernetworking • Easy to follow steps to craft your networking outreach goal • Research necessary to not ask silly questions or feel awkward • Unconventional follow-up ideas and timing that will not come across as thirsty/ pushy • Templates that you can tailor based on your business goals and personality • Worksheet to uncover ways to add value to contacts and make everyone feel good BONUS: 30-second elevator pitch that is MEMORABLE not FORGETTABLE---this is there too TRANSCRIPT Listen up, ladies! Are you familiar with that nagging feeling of not being "enough"? Do you have ideas, hopes, and dreams but no confidence to do them? Well, if you've been battling imposter syndrome, you're not alone. But here's the kicker: it's costing you more than just confidence; it's robbing you of time, money, and opportunities you can't afford to lose. At last week's Mom 2.0 conference, there were hundreds of attendees, including several famous ones. From video gamers to industry disruptors, I connected with many. Now, here's the kicker: If I let my impostor syndrome go unchecked, I wouldn't have had the courage to ask them to be guests on my podcast. Did I hear that little voice in my head saying, "Who am I to do this?" or "Melissa, you're out of your league"? You bet I did. But even as I hit send on those email invites, I reminded myself: With 12 years of coaching experience and my proven method, my impostor syndrome can stick around, but it won't stop the party. Let's turn this to you….Picture this: You've got dreams as big as the sky, but every time you take a step forward, that little voice in your head whispers, "Who are you kidding?" It's time to put an end to that self-doubt and reclaim your power. As a mom founder, you're already juggling a million things. You don't have time or resources to waste on self-doubt. That's where my method comes in - it's not just about suppressing those feelings; it's about conquering them and stepping into your greatness. Enter my Imagination to Impact to Income Method ™. This isn't your average self-help spiel; it's a battle plan tailored specifically for moms like us. With my proven strategies, you'll learn to crush imposter syndrome and turn your dreams into reality. But don't take my word for it. Listen to what one of my incredible clients had to say: Melissa will push you out of your comfort zone, will force you to really look at where you are and where you want to go, and then push you to think even further. Then, she will help you come up with steps to get to your goal and provide support as you do the work. Her ideas are incredible, her methods to get you out of your rut and propel you forward are unmatched. Her Q&A is awesome, especially when she says, okay, let's do this together and sits with you on Linkedin to find the contacts or writes an email with you or otherwise helps you get where you want to go even when you're overwhelmed or uncertain what is next. So, how do we tackle imposter syndrome head-on? We start by breaking free from societal norms and embracing our limitless potential. This requires expansive thinking which is also known as a fertile imagination. You have choices that you will not even think about if you limit yourself to what you've tried or seen other people in your circles do. In my program, I go through the ACE acronym which stands for asset, community, explain…without expansive thinking you will never come up with the idea to use impostor syndrome as an asset….there are other options available to mom founders which I have used and teach. From there, we dive into strategic networking and intentional relationship-building, because success isn't just about what you know; it's about who you know and how you leverage those connections. If you are stuck in step one I feel like an impostor and I do not have a method that works for me then you won't talk to stakeholders. You won't aim for the top of the food chain in your industry. You'll stay in the middle limited by your comfort level. And it we play this out to leveraging these connections…it won't happen….you'll talk to people without the power, authority, or know-how to help you achieve your company vision in a short period of time…you won't have the guts either to ask for what you REALLY want. A lot is at stake if you do not pre-plan for how you will handle impostor syndrome as a mom founder and certainly not as one with big hopes, ideas, and dreams that you want to bring to life in this lifetime. Remember, embracing your limitless potential starts with breaking free from imposter syndrome and leveraging your network for success. Don't let self-doubt hold you back from achieving your dreams. It's time to rewrite your narrative and step boldly into your greatness. And now, I want to tell you how I can help you right now….this is huge and something I'm totally excited about it because it is about bringing mom founders out of the sidelines….from the networking conversations they need to be having to fast-track their success! Listen in: I've got an opportunity you won't want to miss. Introducing "Fertile Imagination to Instant Access: A LIVE 9-week group coaching masterclass" - your fast track to success. But here's the kicker: imposter syndrome is costing you more than just confidence; it's robbing you of time, money, and opportunities. And one of the biggest missed opportunities? Networking your way to faster income success. That's where this masterclass comes in. Available now at a beta rate, but with only 3 spots left in April, this is your chance to conquer imposter syndrome, master the art of strategic networking, and unlock your full potential. Sign up for a 30-minute breakthrough session with me today go to www.melissallarena.com/sessions, and let's kickstart your journey to success. We'll dive deep into your goals, challenges, and aspirations, and explore how this masterclass can transform your life and propel you towards the income and impact you deserve. But remember, spaces are limited, and enrollment is closing soon. Don't let imposter syndrome hold you back any longer. Head to www.melissallarena.com/session now to secure your spot and schedule your breakthrough session. Together, we'll rewrite the narrative of your success story and make magic happen. Let's turn your dreams into reality, starting today. I can't wait to connect with you and see you thrive in the masterclass. Let's make it happen! Alright, powerhouse moms, it's time to take charge of your destiny. Say goodbye to imposter syndrome and hello to a future filled with limitless possibilities. Remember, you've got the power to make it happen. Until next time, stay fierce, stay fabulous, and keep chasing those dreams. This is Melissa, signing off.
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225: Don't Let Mom Guilt Stop You! Meet Alisha Fernandez Miranda, (Mom 2.0 Speaker)
Ever feel that pang of guilt when you finally score a kid-free getaway with girlfriends? How about when you go away to a conference and that means missing your son's trumpet solo? Big confession. I recently went to a conference and missed my kid's solo. Yep, I felt mom guilt especially while I watched the livestream, but as a mom of three, I knew I was doing my best and that this conference (ironically the Mom 2.0 conference) was a big deal for my book and business. And (further justifications) it wasn't an on-stage solo in front of an audience...it was a Saturday morning classroom solo in front of a teacher. All of this to say, yes, mom guilt still continues to pop up for me when I pick career over family (and it doesn't even happen a lot!), and yet it's a constant juggle. So imagine this: what if you had a once-in-a-lifetime opportunity to live in another country without your family to explore your childhood career dreams? Sounds impossible? Would that make you feel guilty? This episode tackles the monster called "mom guilt." Enter Alisha Fernandez Miranda, a super-achiever mom of twins who decided to hit pause on her high-powered CEO career at 40. We delve into her story and ask the lingering questions: Does mom guilt ever truly fade? Is self-care a selfish act, or a necessity? Most importantly, can our actions teach our kids valuable life lessons that words simply can't? Tune in to episode 225 for an honest conversation that will empower you to embrace motherhood on your own terms. Let's connect on Instagram! https://www.instagram.com/melissallarena/ In This Episode You Will Uncover: -How to navigate the guilt of pursuing your own passions as a mom, especially if it means taking time away from your family. -The importance of role modeling and showing your children how to live a fulfilling life, even if it means taking risks. -Why it's better to try something and fail than to never try anything at all. This Episode is Perfect For You If: -You're a mom who feels stuck in a rut and longs to pursue your own interests. -You're wondering if it's possible to chase your dreams while still being a good parent. -You're looking for inspiration to break free from self-doubt and create a life you love. Key Points: -Many moms struggle to find inspiration for pursuing their own dreams because the media often portrays women who achieve success without children. -The guilt of leaving your family can be a major obstacle, but sometimes the risk of not following your dreams is greater. -By taking action and showing your children how to live a fulfilling life, you can inspire them to do the same. -It's okay to fail, and in fact, it can be a valuable learning experience. Taking time for yourself can ultimately make you a better parent. This episode is brought to you by Fertile Imagination: A Guide for Stretching Every Mom's Superpower for Maximum Impact, which reached the #1 spot as an Amazon bestseller in both the motherhood and women and business categories! Woo hoo! And if this episode deeply resonates with you, then you are definitely invited to read my book, Fertile Imagination! In my humble opinion, I believe double-fisting Alisha's book The What If Year and mine, Fertile Imagination, would make for an epically fun weekend of reading. Dive into Alisha's adventures and live vicariously through a fellow mom, and then turn to my personal framework to help you think about your best first step on getting your imagination fired up about your own adventure! As I alluded to earlier, this episode tackles the struggle of mom guilt that tugs at our hearts, even when we deserve a getaway or break from adulting! I've been there too! Moreover, I, Melissa, share a vulnerable moment straight from my book, Fertile Imagination, where I spent Sundays unlocking a surprising talent. And guess what? It was totally worth it! Intrigued to discover your own hidden mom superpower? Head over to https://www.melissallarena.com/fertileideas/ and grab a FREE chapter of Fertile Imagination. It's your guide to maximizing your impact as a mom. Imagine achieving goals you never thought possible, all while rocking motherhood on YOUR terms. Download your free chapter today and ignite your fertile imagination! https://www.melissallarena.com/fertileideas/ Official bio for Alisha Fernandez Miranda ALISHA FERNANDEZ MIRANDA is the author of My What If Year, featured on Good Morning America, CNN, MSNBC, NPR and as one of People's Best Books. She is the host of podcasts Extra Shot with Alisha Fernandez Miranda and the award-winning Quit Your Day Job. Alisha also serves as chair and former CEO of I.G. Advisors, a social impact intelligence agency that consults with the world's biggest nonprofits, foundations, and corporations on their philanthropy and social initiatives. A graduate of Harvard University and the London School of Economics, her writing has appeared in Vogue, Marie Claire, Insider, Romper and Huffington Post. Originally from Miami, Alisha currently lives in Scotland with her husband and children. Follow Alisha on Instagram @alishafmiranda and her website at www.alishafmiranda.com. TRANSCRIPT Alisha Fernandez Miranda. I am excited to have you on the podcast, and I feel like you need to like stamp my passport. Where are we going? Where are you located? Let's chat. Let's chat. Thank you so much, Melissa, for having me. I am in Edinburgh, Scotland right now. Behind me, it's like hurricane force winds blowing outside, which is sort of typical, typical Wednesday for January in Scotland. Yeah, kind of, sort of like, uh, Canada, actually, so it's, it's interesting, but Alisha, I am so excited to have you here. When I saw your profile, cause I know you're going to be attending probably like mom 2. 0, right? Yes, I'm going to be there this year. I was like, wait, whoa, whoa, whoa. There's like this like twinsie of me somewhere in, in Europe. So that's a good thing. Cause I want to eventually land there. But when I saw that you wrote the book, my what if year, I was just like, Holy mother of guacamole. This is so cool. Like, this is like really, really cool. So why don't you share with listeners just a little bit about my what if year, and then we'll go into maybe like what has stopped a lot of moms from pursuing their own what if years. Totally. So I guess the story really kind of started for me in 2019. I was living in London. I had done the expat thing. I grew up in Miami and moved to London in 2008. I was the mom of my twins who were eight years old at the time. I was CEO of a business I had founded with my husband and we were kind of consulting to the biggest foundations and wealthy people, companies, nonprofits, all on social impact and philanthropy and how to give away money a bit better, which was an interesting job. And I sort of, I had done. All of the things that I had said I was going to do in my life. I had my list. I had checked everything off my list and I found myself approaching 40 and thinking, oh my God, is this really where I want to be? Then of course, feeling horribly guilty about. Thinking, is this really where I want to be? Which we can definitely talk about. Cause I think a lot of moms can relate to that. And I just sort of had this moment where I was like, what, what, what were all the things that I didn't do that I had maybe always wanted to do? And is it really too late to try them? Or could I do this crazy thing, which is to take a year and through a series of little small. Sabbaticals, I was calling them, could I go try out all the jobs I wanted to do when I was a kid and never got a chance to do the things that I really loved, like working on a musical or working in the art industry. And so that was my what if year. It was an attempt to explore these paths that I never got to explore and to do internships at the jobs I had always dreamed of doing. So all of that sounds like so theoretically amazing. It's like, I want to just the, the abort mission, but, and I guess you could say on life and I just want to go and be in Cirque du Soleil. That's what I wanted to do. Actually. I have that in my own book, fertile imagination. I didn't do it just let's just to be clear. You haven't done it yet. That's true. I am working on mobility, so you never know what's up for me. But that was like my thing, right? I was like, Oh, how cool would it be Cirque du Soleil? And, and I have other, I have a list of other things too, but there was, there was nothing, I never saw any woman, certainly any mom, Nor any Latina do something where she was away from her kids for such a long time during a time when they still needed her, right? And 40, my goodness. So 40 years old, like how far could someone go 40? I'm just curious from your own perspective, like what sort of things were like, okay. Within the realm of possibilities for a mom versus what you did. I mean, it's such a good question because the guilt was real and the feeling that my primary responsibility was always to my family, no matter what, even if that meant putting myself further down the list. It was just, I had just accepted that. I had accepted that that was the case. Without really stopping to think, what are the implications on my family? If I am a person who is not happy with my life and not feeling complete in myself or full in myself. So, I mean, of course, who are the people that had done this kind of like, They press the abort button on their life, right? Okay, you have like Elizabeth Gilbert who wrote Eat Pray Love, not Latina. Didn't have kids, I don't think either. But she went, she took a year. She went to eat pasta in Italy and to India. And then she went to Bali and fell in love with a hot surfer. And that was the end of that book. But that was not a possibility for me. Neither was the Cheryl Strayed Wild. Also not Latina. Also no children. Because there was no way I was going to sleep in a tent for like a year at a time. But again, she left to deal with her grief. And she walked the Pacific Coast, the Pacific Crest Trail. And this idea of literally blowing up my whole life, that was off the table for me. Because I love my children. I love my husband. And I was so conscious that whatever I did was going to be at best inconvenient for them. And at worst, a really big deal. for their day to day lives, if I was going to leave and go try these things. And so I was very, very conscious of that. It wasn't like I was just like, Meh, screw you all, like I'm going off to Italy to eat all the pasta. So when I started thinking about what this experience was going to be for me, I had a plan. I had, Months of planning, of fitting everything in, of figuring out who was going to pick up my kids from dance and soccer on the different days when my husband had to work, of organizing everything, of figuring out how to do my internships at the same time as their vacations from school, so they could come with me and join me. This was like a beautiful color coded plan because I wasn't willing. To really throw their happiness out. I could never, I could never have done that to them and I couldn't have enjoyed myself if I knew that that was the case. Now, of course, I say all of this and then I'll tell you my first internship started on February 29th, 2020. So all of my careful plans went completely out the window as soon as the pandemic hit, but definitely. I was very, I was putting myself first, but only to a certain extent. I was very conscious that I didn't want my kids and my husband to be collateral damage somehow to my desire to go and chase these opportunities. And it's so interesting because it's, it's true. Like, it's like, who is it that you look towards as inspiration for what's possible in your life? And me too, for, for some odd reason, I don't know if it's just like a quirk, but like, I look at these like billionaires that have no children whatsoever that are men as like, Oh, why can't I be like Tom Bilyeu? And it's like, Hello, you have three kids, two of whom are identical twins who are 10 years old. You live in Austin and there's just no way for you to create a fitness bar or a protein bar without high fructose corn syrup without breaking some nails, right? Cause the machinery that Tom broke and used, I wouldn't do. So it's, it's just a weird, it's super weird, right? Like what a, what an interesting thing to kind of compare yourself. Those articles that are like advice from successful CEOs. And one of the things that, and they're almost always men. And one of the things that they'll say is get up an hour early, get up at 5 AM to start working and start your day and exercise and clear your head. And I'm like, if I'm getting up early, I'm making breakfast for people. I'm feeding the dog. The kids are getting ready for school. So that's, that's not possible in my life. I think you can be a successful CEO, by the way. And still have all those responsibilities, but that model, that inspiration, it's, it's not really meant, I think, for people like us, at least it hasn't been historically. Yeah, which is why we have to kind of carve our own path. So as a mom with two kids who were eight years old, who started this adventure right when the pandemic hit ultimately. And at that, you started with. theater as your first internship, which I think listeners can now appreciate had a big hiatus, right? During that time, how did you sort of navigate the mom guilt? And then also just like the regular guilt, because this was a very unique timeframe. And I'm saying that 1000 times unique once in a lifetime timeframe. Right. As far as being away from family when there was a lot of uncertainty and fear. So why don't you share a couple of stories about that? I felt, I felt, I felt so guilty at every point. I mean, I felt guilty for even thinking that I maybe wanted to. A life that looked different because I had been brought up to always be grateful and appreciative of what you have and what you have been given. My dad was a Cuban immigrant. I grew up in a family where that story of we left everything to come here and give you a better life. And you need to work hard to get to the point where you don't ever have to do that and be appreciative and grateful for everything we've done and what you have. That was my. like cornerstone mythology of my entire childhood. So I felt guilty even for, for thinking. This thought that I was unhappy, that was like something that I shouldn't be, I shouldn't be thinking that. That's just being ungrateful for everything I have. And so I felt guilty even from the inception. I felt guilty about doing something that was about putting my needs, even for a short period of time ahead of my family, even though I did not abandon them completely. I felt guilty about all of those things. And I like to joke always that my dad is Cuban and grew up Catholic. My mom is Jewish. And so I have the most guilt. I have Catholic guilt and Jewish guilt. It's like all the guilt forever. But at the same time, I could recognize, finally, after a lot of thinking and soul searching, that I was not in a good place in myself. I was not happy. I was not being the best mom I could be, or the best wife I could be, or the best me that I could be. Because I felt like I was treading water in my own life, and I was living a life that I had signed up for, but wasn't right for me anymore. And so, really, I got to the point where it felt like the risk of not doing something was greater than the risk of doing something. And this worry that I was always going to feel this way, or maybe even worse, became so great that I just knew, I That it was going to be worth the kind of short term inconvenience for my family as it, as it was going to be worth it to have this experience. Now, right before I left, like the night before I left, my husband and I were sitting on the sofa, and at the time, You're thinking back like late February 2020, China had already been in lockdown for a month. Italy had gone into lockdown. Iran was, I think, in some sort of lockdown. But there was still, people were still saying like, oh, it's going to be contained to these three countries. This is not going to spread. It's going to be very small. The idea that the pandemic would have happened on such a scale was so far from our heads. But I did have a conversation with my husband and I said, do you not want me to go? Do you want me to stay behind? And then I held my breath. Because I was so worried he was going to say, yeah, I think you should stay, which I was going to be devastated if that was the case. Theater was like my dream, the dream of the all the dreams. It was the dream to be able to be part of a production. And I had these incredible opportunities to be part of two shows about to open on Broadway and off Broadway. And so I went and then. The whole time I was there, I kind of had my fingers in my ears until the very end. Things were getting worse. My husband was definitely freaking out. And I was like, nothing's happening. Everything's fine. This is all going to blow over. It's not going to be a big deal. And it wasn't until things got really bad. That I decided to leave. And then the following day, before I got on my plane, they announced that all the Broadway theaters were closing for what was initially going to be a period of, I think, four weeks. And then of course ended up being, I want to say 21 months altogether before everything got back to normal. normal. But yeah, I mean, I was a little bit in denial and I, I, the thing is I felt guilty anyway. I felt guilty, but I did it anyway. Right? Like that's how I navigated the guilt. I never stopped feeling guilty. I just knew that it was important. And so I was able to push the guilt to the side. and do what I knew I needed to do. Yeah, and, and I was wondering about that. So like, kind of like exposure therapy, like, do you feel that it got a little bit easier the first time you're like, Oh, okay, everybody survived. And then the next time and the next time. So do you feel like it got easier during that time? I don't know. I don't know that it's gotten easier. The first time I went on a work trip after the twins were born, they were about not quite 18 months old, I think. And I had a new job that I had started and I went to China and my husband was in, we were in London at the time with the kids and I flew for a kajillion hours to get there. I got there like in the middle of the night and I pick up the phone to call home and it's like a disaster zone at home. Like, They've already been to the, the emergency doctor with my daughter who has like a horrible cough and her nose is blocked and she can't breathe the, and now Carlos is starting to feel sick and I was so upset and like, I have to get on, I have to get on a plane home. I have to go home right away. And of course I couldn't do that. I had other responsibilities. He was like, look, it's going to be fine. You don't need to come home. You're not going to get home in time anyway. Continue with this trip. So I've always had that fear that something has gone wrong. And sometimes stuff has. I went to Paris once on a girl's trip with my daughter and my son broke his arm. And thank God he didn't need surgery, but he was in the emergency room with my husband for several, I mean, like stuff has gone wrong. Even in the book, as soon as I get to New York on my internship, my kids have terrible food poisoning and they have thrown up all over the house. They're all three in bed together, my husband and the twins and. He eventually they had to get that room professionally cleaned before I got home because it was so it was so disgusting. Okay, so stuff goes wrong. It does go wrong. It still goes wrong, and I don't know that it gets easier because my kids are 12 now, and for whatever reason, it feels like they miss me more sometimes when I go away. Now, I don't know if it's that they're better able to articulate how they're feeling than they were when they were little or what. So it's it's. I know that things are going to be okay. That has changed. I know the more times I do it, that everybody will survive. But I'm not sure it really gets easier. The thing that is easier is that I've seen The positive impact of taking these moments for myself, whether it's a work trip that I need to do, or just going to spend a weekend with my girlfriends because I haven't seen them in a long time, or sometimes meeting my parents somewhere that I wasn't able to do. I mean, they're so rejuvenating. They helped me reset. They helped me come back into my life and myself, uh, feeling better and doing better all around. And I think that's, what's gotten easier because I know that it's worth it. Yeah. So even if I still feel guilty about leaving them and I still worry about what's going to go wrong, I know now that I've done it so many times for really fantastic experiences that I would do it again. And I think anyone that's listening, that's inspired by this, I think you don't have to necessarily. Go away for an entire year. We could do this like baby steps. What I mean? It's like you nurse your kid or you bottle feed your kid and then you introduce solid slowly. So it's kind of the same idea for us. I know in my case, in my book, Fertile Imagination, like I decided to actually take storytelling classes at Magnet Theater in Midtown in Koreatown. Love it. Yeah. And it was nine Sundays and I was coming from Connecticut. I like to call it fancy town, Connecticut, and it was a schlep, right? And so the whole idea is I know that on Sunday, technically, if I followed a certain script, like I was supposed to be at home, I don't even know, either washing the walls or like being at a soccer field or like something, right? Making pancakes for somebody, for sure. Right, in the shape of their desired animal farm person, right? Or whatever. I'm thinking dinosaurs and I'm just saying animal farm. I'm like, I'm a city girl. I can't help it. So yeah. And it's kind of like just doing that, like on weekends, for goodness sakes, it's not saying I'm out an entire year, but you could work your way up. If you start noticing that, wait a minute, when I got back home and I saw my kids, I was happier. I had stories to tell, what I mean? So there, there are benefits and it's not all one sided, but it takes courage because then, yeah, maybe, maybe you are not the mom who's doing the things with the other moms and you might feel a little bit like an outsider, but again, was it worth it? And what I'm hearing from you, Alicia, is that it was worth it to actually take action in your life that might go against what. Other individuals may have done before with children that are Latina. And so I'm curious in terms of really what your, my, what if your experience showed your kids, like, why do you, what do you think is the difference? Right? Cause we could tell our kids like, Hey, when you turn 40. I mean, granted it's very far ahead, but like 40, that's so old. I know. Right. So, okay, fine. So, Hey, when you go to college, you could do a gap year, for example. Right. Like that's something that I've heard people say, and, and that's one thing, right, you're saying it to them, but what if you actually like did it yourself? And so for you, Alicia, like, I know they're still young, they're 12, but what do you think is the difference between showing versus telling? A. K. also how to write a good book. I mean, I think, okay. So I remember like when my kids were, when they were babies, I was like, I'm never going to let them eat like junk food because I grew up only eating junk food, but if I eat junk food, my kids, turns out they also like some junk food. Now we don't eat a lot of junk food, but. There's only a certain point that you can tell your kids, wouldn't you rather have this carrot stick than a pack of McDonald's French fries. If you're sitting there eating the McDonald's French fries, they're going to realize that maybe you're not being completely true and authentic to yourself. So I do think that kids receive information so much better. From modeling and from you showing them how to do it. And the thing is that my kids went on this journey with me. They were, I was away for different parts of it, but even the times that I wasn't with them, we were talking on the phone every day and then I would come home and talk to them about what I was doing. And subsequently they got to come on my book tour. They've heard, heard me talk about this book more than I'm sure they'd ever liked to in the world, but they. watched me decide to do something different. They watched me try my hand at these varied jobs, many of which I was very bad at, like very, very bad at. And they watched me fail, and they watched me dust myself off and stand back up and go back the next day and do the thing. To me, that is the most important lesson that I hope they have taken from this and that I try to instill on them is that it is better to try something and fail at it than to not try anything at all. That you are not going to be good at everything and that's okay. And that the most important thing in your life is not necessarily picking the job, doing it perfectly and sticking with it on that path, no matter what happens, then no matter how you feel and that they know that when they're adults and hopefully have families of their own, that they are important people, both my son and my daughter and their needs also matter. And I just was in the U S last week. Doing a bunch of different work things and some fun book stuff and my son and I had, I had, I did a talk at the IFC, the International Finance Corporation for my what if year, it was amazing. And the day before my son was like, why can't you just tell them you're sick and cancel and come home early because I want you to come home so you can come and see my hockey match. And I was like, okay, so not only would that be. Completely setting aside my responsibilities, but also I want to be here. This is important to me. I want to be able to share this experience with people. This is why I did it. Why I wrote the book. Not why I did the internships, but why I wrote the book. And so, no, I'm not going to tell them I'm sick and come home early because this is important to me. And making sure that they are seeing me choose myself sometimes, I am hoping is going to give them that Permission or awareness that when they get to a point in their lives, when they are caring for other people, too, that they know they also can choose themselves sometimes. And that's okay. Yeah, I love it. I think, I think what you said as far as like the, they saw you maybe like, Either fail or, or have errors and stuff, but then like, decide to like, get back up again, like watching you do that. I don't think it, I don't think it could be replaced with words. I mean, that's like resilience in action. That's resilience while mommy ing. Yeah, resilience while mommy ing, I love it. Yeah. Yeah. And, and it's just like, it's beautiful. And, and I witnessed it with my own mom because she has a mental illness. And so every time she'd get into an episode, she had to like dust herself off in, in very dramatic ways. But then it gives you a sense as a kid, it's like, huh, I'm related to that. Maybe I got a little bit of that in me too. Right. 100%. There's beauty. That's how I, I think, I think that a large part of the reason I have such resilience, and I do feel like I'm a very resilient person, so far so good, is because I came from a family that I, I grew up hearing all of the stories of my grandmother, my dad, and his siblings, and my, my grandfather, and how they, how they, you know, Left everything behind. They left Cuba with a suitcase each and nothing else and moved to a country where they didn't speak the language and they had to just pick themselves up and they had, they had no other choice but to do that. And that, knowing that that's part of me, that's inside of me somewhere, has always made me feel A lot more capable of dealing with challenge, I think, because I know there's got to be something in there that came from them that is propelling me forward. And I know that I have that, and I want my kids to know that's part of who you are. You come from a long line of people who have failed at things and had to move forward, and that is, I think, the best gift that I could give them, if that's a realization that they take from this whole thing. Definitely. I love it. Alicia, where can people continue to follow your story and purchase the My What If Year book? Well, you can get my book anywhere that you get books. You can get it at a bookstore. You can get it online at bookshop. org or Amazon if you want. You can listen to me on audiobook if you enjoy this. It's me reading it, so it's basically just like nine hours of this or however long the book goes for. And you can find me on my website, which is aliciafmiranda. com or my Instagram at aliciafmiranda. And that's A L I S H A I'm named after a shoe store. It's not because that name has anything to do with anything else. I love it. Fun facts. Appreciate it so much, Alicia. Have an awesome Scottish day. Yeah, well, let's see if I can survive the wind and rain. Thank you so much for having me. Oh, thank you. You're awesome. That was great. Here are the three things that really stood out for me in terms of this conversation. The first one is, it's true. I have seen a lot of non Latina moms who decide to actually go and live in Europe or press abort mission on their lives, like that we see in the media. But there's not too many Latina moms who have been portrayed, not even in Hollywood, as making this idea okay to choose yourself every once in a while and not have to struggle with so much mom guilt and let it hold you back. Second point is there is this point where if you really think about it, When you weigh the risk of doing something for yourself versus not doing something for yourself, there's that, that point where the risk of not doing it might outweigh the risk of doing it and the inconvenience of doing it. When I lived in Australia with my family, when we all went abroad, it was highly inconvenient to sell every single article of furniture that I had. It was highly inconvenient to find brand new schools, but The risk of not doing it would have meant that my kids would have never been exposed to a completely different culture or side of the world. And for that, I'm grateful. Here's the third point. In terms of, you know, does it get easier, right, with mom guilt. So Alicia said it best in that it might not get easier, but you do appreciate the fact that things will be okay. Having more. evidence that things will be okay if you choose yourself and you're away from your kids just builds your confidence and gives you this sense that, okay, I might be feeling this emotion of mom guilt. However, as in the past, things have been okay. So I hope you enjoyed this conversation. And I want to hear from you. Like, do you suffer from mom guilt? Is it particularly hard or when it's unrelated to doing something that you have to do, like building your business? Like, what if you wanted to all of a sudden take tennis lessons? Like, is that the point where thickly? Let me know on Instagram at Melissa Llarena. I would love to hear from you.
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ABOUT THIS SHOW
Welcome to the Mom Founder Imagination Hub (formerly Unimaginable Wellness), your weekly podcast to inspire you to dream bigger in business, plan how and who can help you get to that next level, find the energy to keep going, and make sure your creative juices are flowing so that you can get what you really want rather than having to settle. Get ready to discover how successful mom founders here on this podcast have reimagined entrepreneurship and motherhood. Ever wonder how they do it? Tune in to find out. And stretch yourself by also learning from diverse entrepreneurs who might not be moms but who have lessons you can tailor about how you can disrupt industries and step way outside of your comfort zone. I believe every mom's superpower is her imagination. In this podcast, I'm going to give you the mindset, methods, and tools to unleash yours.I'm your host Melissa Llarena a mom to three high-energy boys and an entrepreneur since 2011. I carried my firstborn in my Ergobaby to my
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