Movies with Ron

Once, the skies were dotted with them. Magnificent horned dildos and their hot-breathed wind. All hail Casiodorus Ron, dragonslayer! 

It's that time of year again, folks! There is no good. There is no evil. There is only Ron. 

Ron ain't too old for this $#!* so he recaps his favorite sequel from 1989 starring 5 Beers Gibson, Danny Backpounder, Robert & Mia's daughter, and a wadded-up ball of human waste named Joe Pesci. *Spoilers Ahead*

I love the smell of wasteland in the morning, and mutants too. This week, Ron recaps a cult favorite starring Roddy Piper as a man so virile, even the frogs can't get enough. 

Living for himself and answering to nobody, the mighty barbarian warrior, Ron, decides to recap 1983's favorite boob contest. 

Ron's back, in 3D, with 2 balls, and a recap of 1983's best horror film starring Anthony Anthony, Gene Quintano, $1.05, and a crapload of climbing gear! 

Everybody relax, Ron's here to look that big ole John Carpenter right in the brown eye and recap some pure 1986 magic: Dude, Where's My Truck? So sit tight, hold the fort, and remember what old Egg Shen says at a time like this, "Wasn't easy!"

Two men enter; one man recaps our favorite "death on foot" played by Mel Gibson, with Tina Turner hot on his tail in a gold phallus. So bring a diaper, a sax, and a gut full of fear. Ladies and gentlemen, boys and girls, Max Max Beyond Thunderdome is here! Recap starts at 00:10:30

It's a theatrical episode! Did you think Ron could go see the new Evil Dead and not tell us about it? So sit down, shut up, fuse with a couple family members, and let's do this!

This week, Ron wipes out most of life on Earth with his recap of a quintessential 80s favorite starring Catherine Mary Stewart, Kelli Maroney, and Robert Beltran. Recap starts at 00:08:40

This week, he's not a "Ron," he's a witch! And the gang writes a proper love letter to Julian Sands with the help of a special mystery co-host... Recap starts at 00:09:20  

Things get real sticky this week when Ron recaps that one movie everyone saw on the shelf in the video rental store, and ain't no lamp oil gonna fix it. Recap starts at 00:12:00 *spoilers ahead*

This week, Ron's head finally opens up like a flower and spurts a spooky recap all over. You're gonna need a towel. Happy Halloween, folks! *major spoilers ahead*

...for God said unto Ron, "make a new recap," and he did, and it was pretty good!

This week's a "backwards dick" kinda week as Birthday Boy Ron does his absolute best to give Fred Ward a proper send-off without somehow recapping Tremors 2. *major spoilers ahead*

No guards. No walls. Endless dicks. Join us as Ron embarks on the greatest sausage-fest ever told. *major spoilers ahead*

Ron brings that good good 1980 stuff with Alligator: an Alopecian Story, starring Robert Forster, Robin Riker, and the biggest damn lhasa apso you ever saw. www.americanhairloss.org   *MAJOR SPOILERS AHEAD*

Oh Mother Night, protect us in your big black embrace as we take on an 80s recap of epic proportions and attempt to answer the age old question: What is light without dildos? *major spoilers ahead*

You know something, Mean Gene, you don't have to remind me and my Ronmaniacs that Gremlins 2 is Joe Dante's true masterpiece, starring Haviland Morris, Tony Randall, and the lovable John Glover. You just have to ask yourself one question: What are you gonna do when the Ronster runs wild on YOU!?

Santa shakes his belly like a bowlful of jelly, watches his worst employee cheat on him with John Lithgow, then goes around the world with a homeless minor! Come unwrap this recap with Ron and the gang. Do you know how to say, "Yo?" *Major Spoilers Ahead*

In a special request episode, Ron's recap of this '80s straight-to-video gem starring Bo Hopkins and Wings Hauser will definitely have you questioning that next cup of coffee. *Major spoilers ahead*

Hold on to your milk because Movies with Ron will never be the same again. Our favorite recapper spews a 90's action flick starring Dolph Lundgren, Brandon Lee, Cary-Hiroyuki Tagawa, Vernee Watson, and Takayo "Do the thing" Fischer. *MAJOR SPOILERS AHEAD*

This week, Ron (of empty crib and stillborn foal) makes the undoing of the cosmos sound pretty great in one of our favorite "man out of time" recaps starring Julian Sands, Richard E. Grant, and the beautiful Lori Singer. *MAJOR SPOILERS AHEAD*

Nurse Candy returns (!) just in time for a beloved 80s stinker starring James Le Gros, who plays a socially awkward bad-ass that leads his post-apocalyptic rollerskating team against an army of fascists, and all from a supporting role. Jason Patrick and Jamie Gertz are in it as well. *MAJOR SPOILERS AHEAD*

Hi. Ready to play? Yeah, me neither. Let's all just sit back, relax, and listen to undead soldiers running out of ammunition, because Ron's ready to whip out an 80s horror classic all over us.

Bing! Ron's back in the saddle with a story of asses and obsession starring Bridget Fonda and Jennifer Frumpy Leigh.

Need something hard and wet? The gang's got you covered with a 90s genre-bender starring Christian Slater, Morgan Freeman, Randy Quaid, Minnie Driver, and the great Ed Asner! So put on your galoshes and let's do the math together...   *MAJOR SPOILERS AHEAD*

I believe in death. I believe in disease. I believe in George C. Scott and Pulitzer prize-winning playwrights. I believe in injustice and inhumanity, and producing an excellent recap of William Peter Blatty's underrated masterpiece of horror with my brother. *MAJOR SPOILERS AHEAD*

Zach Galligan, Phoebe Cates, and Gizmo star in this recap we'll remember all through our lives, about a pandemic almost as bad as Covid. So cash that unemployment check, spike that eggnog, and forget your troubles, because the gang made a Christmas episode.

If you're into day-drinking and gorge-jumping, then Ron's got a recap just for you! Starring Shawnee Smith and Kevin Dillon, this remake of a 1950's Steve McQueen flick ain't f#%kin around. Sorry for the delay, and thanks for the support! *MAJOR SPOILERS AHEAD*

Come with me! And don't worry about seeing the first one, because we got Will Sampson, Julian Beck, and Geraldine Fitzgerald in a not-so-well-received sequel to an 80s horror classic. So why do we prefer this one, you might ask? Because this time the ghosts enter through both ends. Just ask Craig T. Nelson... *MAJOR SPOILERS AHEAD*

In space no one can hear you get creamed by a 9th-dimensional sex toy that may or may not make us all rich as f#@k. This week, Ron recaps a James Spader and Angela Bassett film that was supposed to usher in the new millenium, but instead taught us to never pick up hitchhikers. *MAJOR SPOILERS AHEAD*

In 1996, Wes Craven and Eddie Murphy blessed the world with the Scream and Nutty Professor franchises; so it's only fitting that Ron takes us back a year prior to an overlooked experiment in horror and comedy, as a token of appreciation and support for the black community, and to teach everyone in this uncertain world: evil is good and ass is good, and if you find a piece of evil ass... WOO! *MAJOR SPOILERS AHEAD*  

Alright buffaloes, get ready for a recap that'll rip you a new orifice. It's the ultimate mash-up of a naive first-timer and a cheesy egotist: John Woo and Jean-Claude Van Damme! Let's not forget the charming Arnold Vosloo, the gravely Lance Henriksen, the one and only Wilford I-Can-Smell-Dem Brimley, and a mullet so wet it'll make a snake's mouth ache. *MAJOR SPOILERS AHEAD*

Listen, creatures of the night! Ron's got a Tom Holland classic for ya starring Chris Sarandon, Roddy McDowall, Amanda Bearse, and William Ragsdale that'll have you carving steaks in no time. *MAJOR SPOILERS AHEAD*

We're back! Now dry those tears of joy because Eric Roberts does enough of that for you in this 1989 Tae Kwon Do classic with a little help from our man James Earl Jones. Hit subscribe and leave a review, why dontcha *MAJOR SPOILERS AHEAD*

If there's anything you can learn from this listener-suggested episode, it's "Buy American." So turn on your ventilator and put on your tap shoes and lets show Mt. Rose what we're made of! *SPOILERS AHEAD*

Hot damn it's been too long, folks, so the gang went and made another classic for the history books, because when you have an old-fashioned studio film like Demolition Man... you need an old-fashioned Ron, ya know, to explain stuff like how those three seashells actually work. And hey: Sylvester Stallone, Wesley Snipes, Sandra Bullock, Denis Leary, and Benjamin Bratt. Has there ever been a better cast list? Hell, they even squoze a subtle Rob Schneider in there. *MAJOR SPOILERS AHEAD*

There are plenty of nice guns out there, they just don't make movies about them. And if they did, they certainly wouldn't star Ice T and Christopher Lambert. *MAJOR SPOILERS AHEAD*

Who's here? I'm here. Ron's here, and this week he wants to show you folks his nightstick. In a special listener recommendation episode, the gang has a grande ol' time with a 1980 William Friedkin film starring Al Pacino. So bring your sense of humor, and maybe a yellow handkerchief for good measure. *MAJOR SPOILERS AHEAD*

Hold on to that holiday cheer, because this week there's going to be a lot of old shriveled-up things flopping in the cold Finnish wind when Ron takes you back to where Christmas got its start: at a reindeer slaughterhouse! *WARNING: MAJOR SPOILERS AHEAD*

Here's Rohnny! Who's ready for a sequel 30 years after the original came out? Well, you're in luck! This week, Ron went to see Doctor Sleep, starring Obi Wan Kenobi and Rebecca Ferguson in a hat. Now who's ready for 2.5 hours of lore expansion? You're in luck again, Doc! Do you know how I knew your name was 'Doc'?

No more boxes, folks. No more deals. It's your flesh we want to experience. So pull up a mattress and have a listen, because this has been a long time coming. Happy Halloween, Clive! Also, check out episode 86 if you wanna brush up on your Hellraiser lore. *WARNING: MAJOR SPOILERS AHEAD*

After this episode, you'll learn that the only friend a growing boy needs is his mother. So turn on some Santo & Johnny, spill some popcorn, and throw a bear-trap at your favorite sheriff, because Ron just recapped a hilariously risky dud from the mind of Stephen King. Like what you hear? Rate, review, subscribe, add to your lists, and look for us on Facebook and Twitter @MovieswithRon *MAJOR SPOILERS AHEAD*

Hey folks, long time no see! How 'bout we celebrate with some gore, boobies, monsters, rednecks, and... canned salmon? Ron keeps the laughs coming with this 1980 Roger Corman classic. Don't forget to look us up on Facebook and Twitter @MovieswithRon *MAJOR SPOILERS AHEAD*

Here's one for the Hall of Infamy. This week, Ron beats John Landis over the head with a toaster oven and everything's coming up vampires and mobsters. A+ voicework. Tell your friends. *MAJOR SPOILERS AHEAD*

Ron's in top form this week with a memorable (and in memoriam) Rutger Hauer recap, also starring Mimi Rogers and that guy from Groundhog Day. *MAJOR SPOILERS AHEAD*

Ferraris, heavy metal, and g-strings made of dollar bills. What more could you ask for? Oh, right... Kyle MacLachlan. How silly of me. Enjoy the show, folks. *MAJOR SPOILERS AHEAD*

This week, Ron brings back the mullet and elevates a late-80s anthology horror film from low-rent to next-time-you're-engulfed-in-flames-you'll-just-play-it-cool. You're welcome. *MAJOR SPOILERS AHEAD*

Ron and the crew are here to brighten up your week, so grab a turban and settle in for some Dolls. *MAJOR SPOILERS AHEAD*