PODCAST · comedy
My Favourite Monster
by George Penney & Tony Johnson
Welcome to My Favourite Monster, a podcast where two professional house sitters, ttrpg fans and comedy fantasy fiction authors, George Penney & Tony Johnson consider every monster in the universe for their pet potential, one by one. Be it xenomorphs, Trogdor, Jaws or a mind flayer we will consider them all!
Episodes
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EP 47 A Room With A Moose - Heaven or Hell?
It's a room with a Moooooose! (from Invader Zim) What do you need to know to survive/enjoy/prosper from this MOOSEY FATE? What is gravitational whale astronomy? Is the borg just space-box? Is an infinite moose a wave or a particle? (we forget entirely to talk about possible world's theory) As a...
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EP 46(Special!) Anne Boleyn - The Vengeful Queen
Special OverLondon takeover! As the 19th of May is the anniversary of Anne Boleyn rather unfairly getting the chop, we figured it was high time we honored both her and our OverLondon universe equivalent The Vengeful Queen! (may she rest in vengeance) Can one fire an arrow box from a bow? Ships…
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(Season 3 return!) EP 45 Powdered Toast Man - Nanotech Buttocks
Ahahaha, we're doing this again!!! In this episode we delve into the depths of our shared history, to that which grew ridges on our smooth child-brains (for better or worse): Powdered Toast Maaaaaan (from the absurd and disturbing "Ren and Stimpy"). If you have no idea what that is, then you're…
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EP 44 The Meg - Shark Pigging
We investigate how a combined Meg-Jason Statham fusion would work as a pet and almost manage to make a coherent episode: Can you milk a cow shark? How exactly, do you grind cheese? Can you use Jason Stratham as a grinder? And yes, we pronounce Jason Statham's name with an R because I once heard...
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EP 43 The VelociPastor - Low expectations exceeded!
We delve into the awful cult movie The VelociPastor and answer all of the questions: What use is a were-dinosaur at a children's party? How cheap was the crappy dinosaur costume? Is China in Pennsylvania or Pittsburgh? What does a montage taste like?
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EP 42 Oscar the Grouch - nuclear powered pachyderm polyamory
We're back! Season 2 baybee! We kick off with the highly contested, Oscar the Grouch... yes, we'll do a proper monster next time I promise. Anyway - we ask the real questions: Is his can nuclear powered? Is he a rent-controlled defense against gentrification? Is his girlfriend comfortable with…
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EP 41 Naughty Editors - psychic damage and you
As we are just finishing off the edit on a book, we thought we'd have a (hopefully informative) rant about editors and the editorial process. Because gnarr. Signs your editor may stink and how to find a shiny unicorn. What are the breeds of editor? How much do they cost? Various stories from the...
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EP 40 The Secret Purpose of the Crystal Gems from Steven Universe
So I had a think about it, and it turns out the Crystal Gem species is rather overpowered. Like... Immortal xenomorph meets nano-tech hegemonic-swarm combined with planet sculpting and a side salad of resurrection plus faster than light travel. So I might have gotten a tiny bit ambitious with…
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EP 39 The Affront - British Tentacle Awfulness
We investigate "The Affront", one of the most charismatic and truly awful alien species to ever exist. A tentacled gas-sac parody of British aristocracy from the book Excession by Iain M Banks, one of the greatest science fiction writers that ever lived. I wax poetic about the post scarcity…
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EP 38 Jashin-chan Doroppukikku - Anime episode wai
In this episode we ramble about our current favorite anime... Jashin-chan Doroppukikku (Dropkick on my Devil) as well as think about pork cutlets and reminisce about eating roast duck ramen in Tokyo. Anyway who doesn't love a regenerating topless Lamia maid who is constantly trying to kill you...
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EP 37 Predator - Spiderflaps vs mud
George made me watch the original Predator and we consider it as a pet. For example: Does it keep walking into stuff at ambient temperature? Where to I get magic invisi-mud? We probe the dark truth as to where glowsticks REALLY come from... And realize predators are really landing in orbital drop...
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EP 36 Alien Covenant Android rant - why is android stubble?
We rant and rave about the androids and magical black goo in Alien Covenant (and Prometheus). Quite a bit, actually... Neutrino shockwave? ...no... just no. Join the egg sniffers guild today, we have cookies! Why android hair??? volcanic glass >> magic faux genetic god alien Chekhov's gun…
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EP 35: Gaspode the Wonder Dog - from Terry Pratchett's Discworld
We dive into the Discworld and consider Gaspode, the cynical ball of stench and disease or as he would put it "Mans best friend, et cetera, et cetera. Give the little doggie a biscuit. Homo-Sapiens! You can keep 'em." We talk about Greyfriars Bobby, the inspiration behind Gaspode. We remember the...
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EP 34: Hallucigenia - The wierdest creature that ever lived
In this episode we travel back 500 million years to look at the pure and unadulterated nightmare fuel of the Cambrian explosion. In particular the weirdest creature named after a literal hallucination: Hallucigenia. * How many pikachu's can you impale on it's back spines? * Which end is the…
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EP 33: Mimics - Chewing gum on the foot of a tarrasque
We delve into the potential of the beloved Mimics: Are tofu halflings an ethical food option? How do they fare against clothing, fall and chainmail blankets? Do mimics have pollen allergies? What is the saddest thing you can stick to a mimic? Are they really the most useful accessory?
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EP 32 Chimera - A lawnmower that tastes like chicken
This is one of those episodes where Tony gets fascinated by the cthonic things that kicked around before Greek myth and George works out which goat head isn't plotting against you. Does your pet Chimera need house-training three times? Does the lion head end up bald on one side and charred on the...
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EP 31 Genius Sharks from Deep Blue Sea - Crank That Dump Stat
For George's birthday shark-o-rama we evaluate the genetically modified hyper-intelligent sharks from Deep Blue Sea. It's one of **those** episodes: Where do I buy fluffy leopard print chainmail? Are sharks anti-capitalistic or merely democratic-anarchists? Where does a dump stat rank against…
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EP 30: Tarrasque - the Apocalypse Engine
This episode we evaluate the absurdly overpowered Tarrasque as a pet: Which out of D&D and Pathfinder has the sexiest Tarrasque? How did it evolve from fish-pig... to cat-tortoise... to walking apocalypse? Is Godzilla gonna sue? Why does his theme song make no sense? And how exactly do you manage...
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EP 29: Tabaxi, catwoman and catgirls - Nyan Nyan Nyan
So we thought we would rate as a pet three concurrent cat-like things, nyan. All three of these would do just fine at either a catgirl, cosplay or furry convention. Which is what a human in DnD typically feels they have joined whenever they walk into a tavern. Futhermore, nyan. Which cat is best...
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EP 28 Graboids - Lovechild of a Bulette and a Dirt-Chicken
In this episode we evaluate the subterranean tentacle-worms, Graboids, from the iconic horror-comedy Tremors as a potential pet. Save on water with a dirt-moat for your evil lair? Is this really just a dirt-chicken? Need a rain of florescent orange entrails? Can those tentacles operate muppets?...
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EP 27: Spelljammer's Giant Space Hamsters - Go for the eyes Boo!
So... Spelljammer is back! And with Boo’s Astral Menagerie it's high time we took at look at Boo's kin, the Giant Space Hamsters! Wait... the giant intergalactic hamster-wheel goes how fast?!? What sub-species is right for you? Is cheek pouch bathing hygienic? Tyrannohamstersaurus rex... The...
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EP 26: Audrey II, the Carnivorous Plant from Little Shop of Horrors - The ethics of the dungeon crawl!
In this episode we discover that dentists make good fertilizer, as we explore the pet potential of Audrey II from Little Shop of Horrors... We even sing a little bit: Is looting a dungeon just salvage without a pirate hat? Why don't plant's have poop holes? Can you really be fired for feeding…
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EP 25: Aboleths - Free mucus for everybody!
In this episode Tony tries to get the tin foil hat off George so he can convince her how wonderful their new Aboleth "pet" is. Honest, it's the pet, not us. We wouldn't lie to you, fellow human. Who needs rolled up newspapers when you have continent sized meteors and planetary self destruct...
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EP 24: Tribble Trouble - The Furriest Amoeba
In an episode that rivals the Slaad one for pure chaos, we barely evaluate Star Trek's beloved intergalactic parasite, the Tribble as a pet: What noise does one make when it's bounced off Capn Kirk's head? Why does Kirk have a better makeup budget than the Klingons? Are Tribbles the answer for...
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EP 23: Flumph - What happens in the flumph room, stays in the flumph room
In this episode we chill out with our sentient mood lighting and wonder at what is simultaneously the most inoffensive and potentially most destructive monster in D&D. A creature that was once an April fools day joke: the Flumph. We ask: How do I monetize my flumph on youtube and twitch? Do i…
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EP 22: Anaconda - Not snek is NOT snek
In this episode we evaluate the Anaconda(s) from the movie Anaconda. Well, to be honest mostly Tony rants at one of the worst snake movies of all time. How do I escape from a bad snake movie? Why does it FLY? Is a candy/rubber snake covered in a condom a realistic pet? Exactly how much plot armor...
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EP 21: Gelatinous Cubes - The Dungeon Roomba
In this episode we debate pet merits of the iconic Gelatinous Cube. Can you push one through a ramen strainer? What happens if they get out into the open steppe? What's with D&D's weird approach to electricity? Is it bouncy or not? Is it a glorified bumper car, or just a dungeon roomba? Is it a...
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EP 20: Velociraptors - Naked Chickens with Hands?
In this episode we rate Velociraptors (from Jurassic Park) for their pet potential. We ask all the pertinent questions: Can I have a slow-i-raptor? What happens if mine isn't a clever girl? Should I ensure my friends have a character arc? How do they fare in a fight with Australian wildlife? Can…
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EP 19: The WORST Godzilla - 98 was a bad vintage for zilla
In this episode we rant and rave about the worst adaption of Godzilla ever to crawl out of a Hollywood management boardroom (The 1998 adaption of Godzilla featuring Matthew Broderick and half the cast of The Simpsons) and we eventually rate it's many pet qualities. We ask the key questions: Is it...
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EP 18: GIR from Invader Zim - Its Avaaaaaanced
In this episode we rate the pet-dog-robot-agent-of-madness that is GIR from one of the darkest cartoons ever made for children, Invader Zim. A creation of Johnen Vasquez, famous for his nihilistic gothic parody. We analyze the squeedily spooch out of GIR, collecting organs and probing the vast...
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EP 17: Modrons - The Afterlives of Typewriters
In this episode George and Tony purposefully catalogue in exacting detail the Modron, a creature of pure order (That means it does precisely what you tell it to). We file (using form 32y, sub-section: query): * What happens to typewriters when they die? * Do armchairs have butt-holes? * How do I...
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EP 16: Gremlins & Mogwai - What does mogwai taste like?
In this episode George and Tony ramble and meander, eventually exploring the furriest axolotl (the Mogwai) and their post pupal stage (Gremlins) for pet purposes. We ask the big pet questions (before George can throttle Tony): * Should you give a biological weapon to your son as a present? * Can...
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EP 15: Slaadi - Angels of Xa0s (pronounced Chaos)
So --> Whats a Slaad? Well, I mean, what ISN'T a Slaad? Honestly, that would be easier wouldn't it? But no, you had to ask what a Slaad was, didn't you? So think of angels and demons right... but get rid of all the angel and demon bits and chuck what's left in a food processor and pour it in a…
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EP 14: Errol the Swamp Dragon From Terry Pratchett's Guards! Guards! - A Total Whittle
For the first time we consider an actual pet as a pet. In this case it is Goodboy Bindle Featherstone of Quirm, also known as Errol the swamp dragon from the Guards! Guards! Discworld novel by Terry Pratchett (one of our favourite books!). And why wouldn't you want a badly run alchemical factory...
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EP 13: Balrogs and Balors - The Apocalypto Pet
We probe the Demonic Balrog from Lord of the Rings and its counterpoint the Balor for people who need a pet that's a little on the wild side. Does your Balrog have a pedigree? Is your local city in need of terraforming? Do you need more flaming whips and vorpral swords in your life? Should you...
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EP 12: No Face from Spirited Away - Transactional Cat Swallowing
We consider the Yokai-like monster No Face (from Spirited Away) as a potential pet. All of the standard pet evaluation questions are asked: Exactly how much of an elephant does he need to eat to mimic it? If he eats you, and goes to jail for cryptocurrency fraud are you in jail as well? Is there…
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EP 11: Sandworms of Dune - Worm Kegels
We consider an Arrakeen Sandworm for our pet. Because the spice must flow! All the relevant lore is reviewed, such as: Do you walk your worm, or does your worm walk you? How much dried shrimp do you need to feed something up to a kilometer long? What are worm kegels? Can you wrestle your worm for...
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EP 10: The Mummy Imhotep - Is That a Scarab in Your Pants?
In this episode we consider for our pet: Imhotep the Mummy (A-Totally-Not-Lich-Honest), from the Mummy franchise of movies. We explore his various uses from chafing grit to self composting. We explore what it means to be juicy in a box for three thousand years with nothing to do but think about...
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EP 9: Slimer - A reciprocating hotdog repository
In this episode we vet Slimer from Ghost Busters as a potential pet. Including in-depth consideration of wet chickens, Instagram bikini shot ruination, nuke transportation, hot dog insurance, bird based signing and immortal floating pugs. We discover the "only" difference between Slimer and...
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EP 8: Zombies - Walking storage that is stackable
We look at the different types of zombies, their causes, the evolution in DnD over the years and learn about: walking storage, optimizing zombie density per square meter and undead assisted farming.
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Ep 7: Totoro - The fluffiest dark matter!
Today we're looking at Totoro from the epic movie My Neighbour Totoro. We may have made the remarkable discovery that he is, in fact, Dark Matter!
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Ep 6: Mind Flayer - Tentacles for everyone!
Today we're having our minds flayed, and possibly going mad auditioning the mind flayer for its pet potential. All the wrongness ensues!
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Ep 5: Trogdor - Burninating the Peasants!
In today's episode we're considering Trogdor for his pet potential. We discuss his many skills and qualities, which include burninating, coming in the night and being majestic with consumate v's! Ok, so if you are one of the few people (*cough cough*) who have not heard of Trogdor then here are...
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Ep 4: Jaws - Bruce The Shy Pooper
In today's podcast, George pitches Bruce the Shark from Jaws to Tony who has vital questions about Bruce's diet and exercise habits. The vital question about Bruce's bathroom habits are asked and sharks and swimming pools are discussed. Some fun stuff: An article about how the film was shot based...
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Ep 3: Black Holes - Smearing Your Friends & Neighbours
In today's episode, Tony suggests a black hole as being the perfect pet while George wonders what an accretion disk is and why she'd want to smear the neighbours on it. Vital questions are asked like: Will our black hole suck in our neighbours? Does a black hole clean up after itself? And, most...
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Ep 2: Xenomorphs - Hug My Face
Today George is pitching xenomorphs to Tony as our new pet. Whether they be an ovomorph, a face hugger, a xenomorph or the Alien Queen, we're considering them all. And asking the important questions like: Do xenomorphs use litter boxes? Will they snuggle on the bed, and Will they eat our friends?...
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Ep 1: Bulette - Jumping The Land Shark
For our monstrous premier episode, Tony is pitching the Bulette to George for its pet potential. Along the way, he reveals that this particular beastie has a fascinating, and unexpected history. The source articles Tony used for this podcast can be found at :...
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ABOUT THIS SHOW
Welcome to My Favourite Monster, a podcast where two professional house sitters, ttrpg fans and comedy fantasy fiction authors, George Penney & Tony Johnson consider every monster in the universe for their pet potential, one by one. Be it xenomorphs, Trogdor, Jaws or a mind flayer we will consider them all!
HOSTED BY
George Penney & Tony Johnson
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Frequently Asked Questions
How many episodes does My Favourite Monster have?
My Favourite Monster currently has 48 episodes available on PodParley. New episodes are automatically indexed when they're published to the podcast feed.
What is My Favourite Monster about?
Welcome to My Favourite Monster, a podcast where two professional house sitters, ttrpg fans and comedy fantasy fiction authors, George Penney & Tony Johnson consider every monster in the universe for their pet potential, one by one. Be it xenomorphs, Trogdor, Jaws or a mind flayer we will consider...
How often does My Favourite Monster release new episodes?
My Favourite Monster has 48 episodes. Check the episode list to see recent publication dates and frequency.
Where can I listen to My Favourite Monster?
You can listen to My Favourite Monster on PodParley by clicking any episode. We provide an embedded audio player for direct listening, and you can also subscribe via your preferred podcast app using the RSS feed.
Who hosts My Favourite Monster?
My Favourite Monster is created and hosted by George Penney & Tony Johnson.
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