NoMeansNo Thing

WE'RE NOT QUITE DEAD!  WE THINK WE'LL GO FOR A WALK!!  Welp, we crawled our asses back to the mic to bring you nearly 2 1/2 hours of rambling dumbshittery!  YOU'RE WELCOME!  Good songs are laid upon the altar of sacrifice this ep.  And some painful reminders of old songs long dead.  Who's dumbshit idea was this anyway?  In any event, it was a hoot being back on the mic to talk about this genius band. We hope you enjoy, and as always we'll do our best to get back much sooner than we have been.  

ANOTHER ONE! ANOTHER ONE!  We dive back in with yet another culling of the field.  Blood soaks the loam of the musical fen as mists writhe around the ankles of the victorious pugilists.  I get drunk.  We opine about how great it is to be back on the mic.  We missed each other.  We missed the podcast.  We missed you.  Enjoy!!

WHERE LIES THE STRANGLING FRUIT THAT CAME FROM THE HAND OF THE SINNER I SHALL BRING FORTH THE SEEDS OF THE DEAD TO SHARE WITH THE WORMS THAT GATHER IN THE DARKNESS AND SURROUND THE WORLD WITH THE POWER OF THEIR LIVES.  IYKYK.  :)  Songs.  Fighting.  Great guest!  SUPER DUPER LONG.  Enjoy this shit.  Take a break.  You need it.

Nothing prepares me for episodes like this one.  First off, it's back to the old looooooong episode for you!  Hope you like that sort of thing.   But this time it was just impossible choice after impossible choice.  Genuine sadness in the face of a totally made up exercise that means nothing, to no one.  Weird creatures, we humans and our attachments!  Anyway, cheers!  Grab a beverage and listen up!

Blah blah killer songs blah blah one winner.  You get the drill by now.  The crappy part is our Podcast recording platform ONCE AGAIN has screwed the pooch and cut out a piece of the recording.  Our producer has done their best to salvage the few minutes affected, but it still blows.  So sorry about that.   The songs this time, in fact, are killer.  But you knew that.  

Well, fuck.  The gypsies curse has struck and given us a bit of an audio blow in the middle of this episode.  Only a few minutes lost, but still stings. :)  That said, we got one out to you in two weeks!  It's a minor miracle!  Four more songs battle for supremacy, ONE SONG WILL REMAIN!!!!  MATTHEW INDULDGES IN FROG PORN THAT YOU SHOULD BE GLAD YOU CAN'T SEE WITH YOUR EARS!!!  END TIMES STUFF FOLKS!  Enjoy.

FINAL ROUND GO!!!!!  We are back with the show proper, and ready to wade through the remaining champions to find the VERY BEST NMN SONG OF ALL TIME (there isn't one, they all rule).  We are glad to be back, glad to be in your ears, and have a plan to be at least *more* regular.  Thanks for you patience, and enjoy!!!  Also, make sure to send an audio file explaining what YOU think the best NMN song of all time should be to [email protected].  Just freakin' do it.

We're Freaking Back!!  For now.  We return NOT with the official start of the final round of our podcast, but with an episode where we talk about all of the other bests:  Best opening track, best closing track, best one-two punch, best sound effect of man pissing in bucket...you know, important stuff!  Also there is drunkness and technical difficulties.  You'll love it.  WE'VE MISSED YOU!!!!!

Here is our Round 2 Wrap Up!  We go through each episode, review our choices, lament our errors, and rescue three songs from the dustbin of history.  Our walk through the hall of shame was illuminating, remembering our votes, the good times, the bad times, the drunk times.  Join us, yell at us, celebrate us, throw your phones across the room in frustration.  Whatever, you can't hurt us.  See you in Round 3 fukcers!

Well, here we are.  The very end of the second round of our dumb choices.  Six songs are packed into this episode, and three limp forward into the final battle.  Eat it in bites, as we packed in 2.5 hours for ya.  Slowly Melting vs. Rag's and Bones (!?!?!?! NOOOOOOOOO!), Revenge vs. Something Dark Against Something Light, and Ashes vs. Stop It.  I don't know, I quit.  I can't make these choices anymore.  Luckily they don't matter.  We're cookin' up round 3, the final round, and will have some special episodes in the interim. No idea of the timing, but thanks for being with us as we do this meaningless exercise.  Y'all are amazing!

Don't blame us, them's the rules.  You don't get to abstain.  It's just the rules.  Dang.  Almost through all of the songs in round 2.  What will go through?  Will your babies be spared, or do we, like Solomon, cut that mewling sucker right down the spine?  Dunno, listen and find out.  It's The Day Everything Became Nothing vs. Self Pity and Oh, Canaduh vs. The Jungle.  Get it.

Hey nerds.  Happy Thanksgiving/Genocide Day for those who observe!  Look, this isn't a real episode. So don't feel obliged to listen.  Sorry if you got excited...or worried.  This is an episode where one of the hosts, Jordon, does the thing he said he wouldn't do...say how you can throw small bills at the podcast. Not for him, but for art.  Anyway, it's short.  Listen.  If you feel moved to help support the art mentioned there-in, you can do so here: https://theimaginists.org/support-the-imaginists

KAIJU ALERT!!!!  The rumbling of giant feet echo across the horizon, their roars screaming as they fill the void!!!  It's Long Days vs. End of All Things and Life Like vs. The River!  AAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAA.  Everyone drinks this time, and fun is had by all (most).  There are only a few episodes left in this inglorious Round 2, what will survive and move ahead, and which gets buried in the ancient burial ground destined to haunt a future suburban family?  Tune and and find out.

I think this is a hell of an episode, we hope you enjoy it!  Only one of us gets drunk, I'll let you figure out who.  This week it's Junk vs. Humans and The Rape vs. Stocktaking.  Goddamn these are some great songs.  Get your ass in gear and get ready to judge us as we make the uninformed choices we have doomed ourselves to make.

Man...sometimes we record an episode, and after it's done I want to go back and just hit delete.  But I don't.  You have to suffer through this if I do.  It's a good episode, I just question my judgement and blathering more than usual.  But, also, every podcast needs a villain and I'm doing my part to live up to the role.  This week it's Bitches Brew vs. I Think You Know and The Phone Call vs. Dad!  Dive in, nerds, and suffer.

World's nicest Human Andy Kerr joins the three Nomeansnerd's to talk about flatware, and hundreds of other interesting topics!  Special Note:  We recorded this episode on video, so seeks us out on Youtube if you'd like to see this one with some faces.  The last part of this episode features Andy pulling some surprise items out of a NMN grab bag, and while it works just fine on audio only, it's probably enhanced by seeing the visuals.  Anyway, we're so grateful to Andy for sitting down with us, and all of the support he's given our dumb effort these past three years.  Enjoy!   

Back again!  With our dumb hot takes!  Take our takes!  TAKE THEM!  This week it's No Sex vs. One and the Same vs. When Putting It All In Order vs. I've Got A Gun.  More great songs and questionable commentary, and a hell of a lot of fun and nerding out.  Enjoy!  And remember, everyone's got a hole.

An important message from host Jordon Flato.

This week we're joined by a very very special guest:  Jordon's son Parker!  Parker is a literal lifelong NMN fan, and out-nerds all of us in the best way possible.  This week we pit Heaven is the Dust Beneath My Shoes vs. Rise and Madness and Death vs. Ghosts.  As always, the choices are hard, the votes are wrong, and the hosts are tipsy.  Sorry, as always, that this one is so delayed.  But hey, it's 2.5 hours.  That should tide you over for a bit.

Back again, with four great songs we stupidly compare and contrast.  Also, Jordon briefly becomes Alex Jones before realizing his error.  Victory vs. Land of the Living and Who Fucked Who vs. Old.  Songs spanning the history of the band...which do we blithely toss to the side and which join Milkis on the dais?  Tune in and get pissed!

Back again, with some luciferian delights to thrill and enrage you.  This week it's Red Devil vs. Joy and This Story Must Be Told vs. The World Wasn't Built In A Day.  This was a delightful raft of songs to listen to a thousand times in a row, I can tell you.  How will this one shake out?  Do we make a pact with ol' Satan?  Are we telling stories or arguing that the world WAS in fact built in a day (or maybe 7)?  Tune in and drop out, nomeansnerds.

Ever just feel like throwing the ol' paper bag on your head, mining your deep sadness and goin' out to yell at all the dumb f**ks out there walkin' around like they was blind?  Us too.  Instead we listen to some amazing songs which generate just enough catharsis to get us through one more day.   It's Valley of the Blind vs. Almost Like Home and Everyday I Start to Ooze vs. And That's Sad.  Time to piss off some of you again!  Only doin' our job folks, only doin our job.  

Before we get into it, there are some serious audio issues here.  So sorry.  Didn't want to bin the whole thing, especially with it being late and all.  The worst is the first five minutes.  After that gets better with a little subtle echoing.  Man.  Sorry.  Anyway.  SONGS!  DRINKING GAME!  Every time Jordon butchers the title of Cats, Sex and Nazis, take a drink!  You'll be as wasted as he was by the end.  Cats, Sex and Nazis vs. Hello/Goodbye, and My Roommate is Turning into a Monster vs. Lullaby.  A very interesting set of matchups.  I think this ep is a lot of fun actually, we hope you like it too!

The pod is back, and we've brought our lunch.  Every time this gets fricken harder.  This week it's Mary vs. Some Bodies, and Kill Everyone Now vs. Obsessed.  I mean...come on.  What the hell are we even doing!?!  Anyway, these songs are great, all of them, and they all deserve to be lionized.  Which we do.  A lot.

Hey NoMeansNerds!  It's such a great time to be a fan of this band!  The new book as released and is in the wild, Dead Bob is out there KILLING IT on tour (with a wider tour coming soon), and the general feeling is one of 'hell yeah the NoMeansRenaissance is in full swing!'  In that vein we're THRILLED to bring you an interview with Paweł Homiński and Anna Mach, who are responsible for the Polish translation and publishing of the new book by Jason Lamb, From Obscurity to Oblivion.  Paweł and Anna join Matthew in his garage, where we get to hear about their story, and hear about the experience of getting From Obscurity to Oblivion out to one of the bands most fervent and loyal fanbases.  Enjoy!   Order the Polish version of the book here: https://www.underdogpress.pl/produkt/jason-lamb-nomeansno-w-drodze-znikad-donikad/?fbclid=IwAR05ehtEypC6Vwi3Ca5kWZ5H-2vzs2m8Dzpt13ZV3fLu4DWbFlKnNdHYDU0 English language version: https://www.barnesandnoble.com/w/nomeansno-jason-lamb/1142933540?ean=9798887440149

THESE ARE THE WRONG ENDINGS!!!!  Holy crap, this gets harder each week.  Listener, I already have deep regret about a vote here.  I don't think it's the Wrong vote, but man, it's hard to sit with.  Michelle has stopped speaking to me.  Many of you will come after at least half of the hosts this week.  We are THRILLED to welcome back the wonderful Mr. Chet Zar, incredible artist and erudite NMN fanatic.  We promised Mr. Zar he could return when a certain song came up, and came up it did.  This week it's Big Dick vs. My Politics and All Lies vs. I Am Wrong.  I mean, YOU choose between these songs, see how good YOU feel about it.  Jeez.  Thanks to Chet for returning, and thanks to all of you for continuing to listen to us even after we vote off what is sure to be a favorite of some of you.  That's going to keep happening.  It's the nature of this dumb format we chose.  Sorry.

BIG songs this week, spanning three albums and many NMN moods.  Every week gets harder and harder (that's what she said).  This week is It's Catching Up vs. Dark Ages and Two Lips, Two Lungs and One Tongue vs. The Fall!  Get your axes sharpened, as at least 50% of you will come away pissed.  

Well, we did it again!  We managed to corner one of the Wrights and demand they speak to us and answer our increasingly inane questions.  There is a lot to dig into in this interview, with John giving some great insight into his amazing new project Dead Bob, news on the upcoming tour, and some tantalizing bits about upcoming projects.  Grab a fork and dig in folks!!!!

We are joined by amazing artist and bonafide NMN fanatic Chet Zar!  The songs this week whip ass, the discussion is spirited and, if I don't say so myself, excellent.  Sidling up to the bar is Mama's Little Boy vs. Body Bag and Give Me the Push vs. A Little to High.    Damn it.  Freakin' hurts more and more as these gems come before us and bare their necks.  But as I remind Chet at a key moment, none of this fucking matters, and our votes mean nothing.  So, grain of salt and all that.  Enjoy y'all!

What a bunch of songs!  None of them deserve the boot, but two the boot must receive:  I Can't Stop Talking vs. The Tower and Metronome vs. The Graveyard Shift.  Man, this was a fun episode, and we love talking about these songs, but jebus it really hurts to say goodbye to some of these!  Will the best song survive?  Well, they are all great songs, so by definition, yes?  I dunno.  Sometimes I write these things in a hurry.

Grab them weenies and 'mellows, impale them on a sharp stick and slowly roast them over a blazing fire kids!  This week is...this week...the songs...well...hmmm.  Look, The Terrible Machine(tm) decided to let a bunch of scrappy little fuckers have at it.  Don't get us wrong, there are good songs here, but none you might expect to see in Round 2 or certainly to make it to Round 3 (with one notable exception I think). Any way, it's Baldwang Must Die vs. Life in Hell and No Fckng vs. Now It's Dark.  Yeah, us neither. 

A true and proper episode this time gents and germs and ladies and lice and all in-between and outside.  This week it's Paradise vs. Lost, and Ya Little Creep vs. Joyful Reunion.  Some scrappy little toughs take up their knives against some bonafide Kaiju, trying to pull some real David and Goliath shit.  Will these upstart more obscure scrappy little fucks take out their towering challengers with some well placed jabs and good luck?  Listen in and find out.

Hey nerds.  This is NOT a 'real' episode.  We normally would have just stayed dark this week while Michele is off gallivanting about having a 'life' or some shit, but instead, after podcast listener Emelie all but BEGGED Jordon to do an episode proselytizing about his favorite book of all time (soon to be yours) Book of the New Sun by Gene Wolfe, he couldn't resist the call, and sat in front of the microphone and blathered about this book for, oh, about 20 mins.  I dunno.  You can probably skip it.  Except for Emelie.  You made me do this.

Ep 52 – Back on Track!  We’re back, babeeee!  Back in the saddle and ready to sling our bullshit once again.  This week we tackle I Need You vs. Manic Depression and Faceless May vs. Forward to Death.  Yet again the Terrible Machine pulls a fast one on us and pits two Rob Epics against two rip roaring bursts of joy.  What will win out? Will there be fights?  Will there be blood?  

We are joined by the excellent Andy Sandall this week, contributor to the upcoming “From Obscurity to Oblivion” book by Jason Lamb, and knower of many much NMN lore and history.  And, to the delight of many I’m sure, Andy excoriates those of us deserving of such on the pod for our lack of Oh No Bruno! Love. Look folks there was a lot of drinking in this episode.  A lot.  Too much.  Too much is not enough!  It’s 3 hours.  I’m sorry. I’m really very very sorry.  You’ll want to break this one into chunks probably.  Or start listening and at some point just say “yeaaaaaaah, I’m gonna come back to this one later” and then don’t.  But you should, because Andy opens up some really great discussions and has some really interesting thoughts on these songs.  Oh yeah the songs!  It’s a doozy.  Now vs. Beauty and the Beast, and Sex Mad vs. 0+2=1.  I mean, come on.  The votes are real nail biters this time, with some honest to god drama.  And Jordon heartily apologies for his misuse of the term Archipelago.  I’m fully aware that an Archipelago is a land mass and not a musical term.  Honest.

Peace be upon ye, Nomeansnerds. Recent events have made it complicated for us to brew you some new derring-do. But quail not, true believers! Hero of the show and Very Special Boy, Sean MacTiernan, had too much to say to be condensed into a tidy email, so instead decided to bestow upon us a scant sample of his decades of thinking about, and subsequently blithering about, our favourite band. Sean is a podcaster of some experience and also dude can confabulate. We found his offering moving, thought-provoking, and hilarious. We hope you do too. Sean's most recent podproject is called SFULTRA, in which he, not historically a SF kind of feller, bought 100 SF novels and reviews them in an attempt to convince himself to like these genres. Available on whatever podthing you use. 

This week we are joined by esteemed Jason Lamb, of the upcoming NMN Book "From Obscurity to Oblivion!"  It's good to be back in the saddle, sorry this one was late.  We cut you off a juicy slice.  Being as this is round 2, no vote is easy, this week is no exception.  It's Oh No Bruno!! vs. Tired of Waiting, and Brother Rat/What Slayde Says vs. Dead Bob.  At this point at least half of you will be pissed at our choices.  And for one pairing in particular probably about 9/10ths of you.  Anyway.  You love us. Enjoy!

There is absolutely nothing interesting or unusual about this episode.  At all.  Best to just move along.  No need to get excited or hyped or anything like that because, in fact, there is nothing to get excited about.  So, just, you know skip this one or whatever.  Don't listen right away, don't drop what you're doing and immediately binge this 2:45 minute episode.  Because, as I've said, and I can't stress this enough, there is nothing, absolutely nothing, remarkable.  At all.  OK WE INTERVIEW ROB WRIGHT IN THIS EPISODE HOLY SHIRT BALLS!!!!!!

I think we get our legs back underneath us this episode.  It was a fun one to do.  Unfortunately, no guest this week, but that will return next ep (we hope!).  This week sees This Wound Would Never Heal vs. Hunt the She Beast and More ICBMs vs. No Rest for the Wicked.  

Do you hear the angels singing?  That's the start of...Round 2!!!  We're back, hopefully on a regular cadence although we make no promises.  None.  Zero.  We start off with a bang, bringing in friend of the podcast Chuck Wood to join us in making the impossible choices.  This round starts off with Victim's Choice vs. Real Love, and Small Parts vs. Rich Guns.  Which songs will come out on top?  Can we make it through a whole episode (this question is truly up for debate).  We're glad to be back, we've missed ya.

We sit down with Becky Black of the AMAZING 'Pack (A.D)', to talk about touring with NMN, and dive deep and go wide into a bunch of subjects.  We want to apologize to the listeners, and to Becky, for the bad sounding audio in this episode.  We had to record over Zoom, and...well, it's trash.  But, the interview is still great, so have a listen!  And if you aren't already a fan of the Pack (A.D.), what the hell is wrong with you?

We wrap up our bottle episode on The Sky Is Falling and I Want My Mommy, selecting two more winners, and then pitting all of the champions in a death match which will leave only two!!!  Come on, you already know which two songs are going through, don't be coy.  

Don't look up, because the Sky Is Falling, and I Want My Mommy!  We decided to tackle this album before we start Round 2 proper, and in this episode we tackle four of the songs (1/2 the album) and give them our usual fair and objective treatment.  Our randomizer pit The Sky is Falling vs. Chew, and Bad vs. Ride the Flume.  How do you feel about this album?  Your answer to that question may prefigure how you will feel about this episode! :)  I think, it's safe to say, that we are enjoying this re-visitation of this album more than we expected. 

Don't listen to this one first; it spoils ALL THE SUSPENSE of everything before it. But if suspense gives you the jibblies, then by all means fill y' boots, chum. Unless you like the jibblies. In your jorts. Point being: this episode wrecks the results of TWO YEARS' WORTH of our yammering. So don't do it. Start at ep.1, listen to ep. 0 if you absolutely must, and please keep in mind that it wasn't until about ep. 12 that we weren't totally mortified that our nerdy bullshit was out in the world where humans could hear it. ***** The votes are in, in the most consequential election of our lifetimes!  A whole bunch of you submitted your votes for which songs to rescue from relegation, and in this episode we report in on which six songs you've managed to save and bring forward into Round 2.  We are very very pleased with your choices.  But, because we are the petty dictators that we are, we also chose six songs to rescue from the dustbin.  This means 12 of our precious babies (six from you, six from us) will live at least a short while longer.  But many many more have now finally and officially been cast into the outer darkness, where there is much gnashing of teeth.  The reality of that has really sunk in now.  Don't like it.

This one's a real turkey, folks!  I mean, do your three favorite NoMeansNerds bullshit together for just over an hour?  Yep.  Are we talking about your favorite band, THE BEST band of all time?  Also yep.  Is it as coherent and entertaining as past episodes?  Low bar, but prolly nope.  But, hey, maybe for you 'Muricans it will give you an hour of distraction and reprieve from your relatives and/or the dishes.  Anyway, we'll be back with real episodes which talk about songs real soon.  Until then, you get this.  Sorry.

After two long months slogging through regular ol' life, we finally have a new episode for you.  No, it's not the official start of Round 2, its the first half of our Round 1 round up.  Is it worth your time? I dunno.  We had a great time recording it though.  And, some interesting fault lines are starting to appear regarding opinions on what will make it all the way down the field.  We hope you'll listen, and part 2 should be released on the regular Thursday schedule in a few weeks.  After that, not sure how soon Round 2 will officially launch, but we are beginning work on it, so things are looking good.  Thank you everyone!

WE DID IT.  Season 1 complete!  We made our way through the entire catalog, boring you with our dumb takes on each. And. Every.  Freaking.  Song.  This week, as our gift to you for making it through so many episodes of this podcast, we are brining you a THREE HOUR PODCAST.  Do yourself a favor and break it up into several listening sessions.  Our last roster of competitors, 6 this time is:  New Age vs. Ya Little Creep, The Rape vs. Black Silhouette, and Almost Like Home vs. Perambulate.  Plus, a bunch of listener submissions, and the very last set of Andy's Kerrections....so pull up a beer, a chair, a rock, or whatever, and enjoy!  We will be taking a bit of a break, maybe 2 maybe three months.  We'll be hard at work during that time working on season 2.  See you soon(ish)!

In our penultimate episode of Round 1, we tackle four beastly songs from across the spectrum of tone and era.  It's Catching Up vs. Living is Free and Hunt the She Beast vs. Angel or Devil.  Say your prayers and lock your doors, because there is a lot comin' at you this episode.  

Grab a giant steaming black mug of mud and sit through another episode of the search for the best NMN song of all time.  We pit Give Me the Push vs. Too Much Dope and Lullaby vs. No Means No.  Since two of the songs in this roster are very obscure, we decided to put the whole track up for your enjoyment (and because they aren't 8 min epics).  Enjoy!

We've been fairly unanimous as of late with our picks, something maybe some of you have been yelling about into your speakers or a cloud.  But not this week.  Drama and suspense abound as opinions skew wildly different on this strange and interesting slate of choices: All the Little Bourgeoise vs. Forward to Death, and Oh Canaduh vs. Faith!  Place your bets!  Who will win?  Which side will YOU choose?