Not By Chance Podcast
by Dr. Tim Thayne
It’s hard to define what a successful and happy family is, much less how to achieve one. Dr. Tim Thayne, a thought-leader in teen treatment and parent coaching, shares inspiring best practices gleaned from decades of his own and other expert’s work related to intentional family living. Whether your family is in the midst of a major struggle or you are looking for fresh ideas to help you prioritize and enhance your home life, this podcast is for you.
Episodes
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From Treatment to Employment: Setting Teens Up for Success | Roger Knecht
Ever wonder how to help your teen truly thrive after treatment? In this episode of Not By Chance Podcast, host Tim and guest Roger Knecht explore how a first job can build confidence, independence, and real-world life skills. They share practical strategies for guiding your teen from treatment…
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Moments That Matter: Crafting Family Traditions Your Teen Will Remember
What makes a family bond unbreakable? This episode of the Not By Chance Podcast is your blueprint for building lasting connections through meaningful traditions. Join Tim and Roxanne as they unpack the science and art of family rituals—revealing why shared traditions aren't just fluff, but proven...
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Turn Conflict Into Connection: The Four Statement Framework | Emil Harker
What if the most heated arguments with your teen could become your greatest opportunities for connection? Marriage and family therapist Emil Harker joins us to challenge everything you thought you knew about parent-child conflict. Drawing from his own struggles as a newlywed who "didn't have a...
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Beyond the End Zone: Erik Kramer's Game-Changing Mission
Ready for a game-changer in teen parenting? This episode of "Not By Chance" with Dr. Tim Thayne tackles the tough stuff head-on. We're diving into the world of Eric Kramer, former NFL quarterback turned mental health champion. It's a story of grit, loss, and an ultimate comeback that'll leave you...
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Marriage First: The Foundation of Effective Parenting | Mike Gurr
Ever felt like you're juggling flaming torches while trying to parent a troubled teen? Get ready to transform that precarious act into a masterful performance as Mike Gurr and Tim Thayne explore the art of intentional parenting after treatment. This episode of "Not By Chance" is your backstage…
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Freedom as Fuel: The Science of Motivating Teens
Ready to revolutionize your approach to teen independence? Join Dr. Tim Thayne and Roxanne Thayne as they unpack the power of freedom as a motivator in this eye-opening episode of "Not By Chance." We're diving deep into the world of intentional parenting, where trust becomes your secret weapon…
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They're Wired for Freedom, Are You Wired to Let Go?
Ready to revolutionize your approach to parenting teens? Join Dr. Tim Thayne and his wife Roxanne as they unpack a groundbreaking shift in teen treatment and family dynamics. This episode of "Not By Chance" challenges the old control-based parenting model, replacing it with a fresh perspective…
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Understanding Teen Resistance: Signals, Not Defiance
Are you tired of feeling like you're in a constant tug-of-war with your resistant teen? Get ready to transform your parenting approach as Tim and Roxanne Thayne dive deep into the world of teen resistance, offering you a lifeline of understanding and practical strategies. In this eye-opening...
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Resilience Runs in This Family: Teaching Teens to Draw Strength from Pioneers, Heroes, and Models
Ready to revolutionize your parenting game? Join Dr. Tim Thayne and Roxanne as they uncover the hidden superpower of family history in building teen resilience. This episode of "Not By Chance" isn't just a walk down memory lane—it's a blueprint for crafting unshakeable teen confidence using the...
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When Your Teen Stops Caring - What to do When Consequences Don’t Work
Are you feeling like you're in a constant tug-of-war with your teen? Get ready to transform that power struggle into a powerful partnership! In this episode of "Not By Chance," Dr. Tim Thayne and Roxanne Thayne dive deep into the world of modern parenting, where traditional consequences just…
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Shifting Paradigms: How Treatment Programs are Further Empowering Teens
Ready for a revolution in teen treatment? Join Dr. Tim Thayne and Trina Packard as they unpack the seismic shifts reshaping adolescent care. From behavioral boot camps to family-centered healing, discover how treatment programs are evolving to meet the needs of today's teens and their families....
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The Secret to Lasting Change: One Teen’s Move from Rebellious to Responsible
Ever wondered how a troubled teen transforms into a beacon of hope for others? Join Dr. Tim Thayne on the "Not By Chance" podcast as he sits down with Ciara Fanlow, a former troubled teen turned mentor. Together, they explore Ciara's journey through the stormy seas of adolescence, highlighting…
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From Powerless to Powerful: Influencing Change In Your Family
Ever feel like you're stuck in a cycle of powerlessness when it comes to parenting challenging teens? This episode of the "Not By Chance" podcast is your guide to transforming that feeling into a sense of empowerment. Join Dr. Tim Thayne and his wife Roxanne as they explore strategies to help...
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When Safety Comes First—What Comes Next? How Great Programs Shift from Supervision to Self-Leadership
Ever wondered how wilderness therapy can transform a teen's life? Join Tim Thayne and guest Danny as they explore the intricate balance of safety and growth in teen treatment programs. This episode dives into the heart of wilderness therapy, where safety isn't just a protocol—it's the foundation....
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From Long-term to Short-term: One Founders Take on the Future of Adolescent Treatment
Ever wondered how to navigate the maze of adolescent mental health treatment? Join Tim Thayne and Tony Moshier in this enlightening episode of the "Not By Chance" podcast, where they unravel the complexities of residential treatment programs. With Tony's extensive experience as a past president…
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Show Up at the Door of Discharge: One Mother’s Experience
In this episode of the "Not By Chance" podcast, Dr. Tim Thayne welcomes Kristin Oliver, a mother from Wisconsin, to share her heartfelt journey through her daughter's long-term residential treatment for mental health and behavioral challenges. Kristin opens up about the struggles her daughter...
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Ownership: The Missing Ingredient in Transition Planning
Ever feel like traditional transition plans for teens are more of a burden than a benefit? In this episode, Dr. Tim Thayne and Roxanne Thayne introduce a groundbreaking shift in approach that promises to change the game. Imagine a world where teens take the reins of their own transition plans…
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The Silver Lining of Sending Them To Treatment
Ever feel like the transition of bringing your teen home from treatment is a daunting task? In this episode of "Not By Chance," Dr. Tim Thayne and Roxanne Thayne transform this challenge into an opportunity for growth and positive change. They guide you through reframing anxiety as excitement,...
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Season 5 Premiere: Trustyy - The Game-Changer in Adolescent Aftercare
Welcome to the fifth season of the "Not By Chance" podcast, where we embark on a journey of innovation and support for families navigating adolescent treatment. Join Dr. Tim Thayne and his wife Roxanne as they unveil Trustyy, a groundbreaking app and service designed to bridge the gap between...
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Mastering Negotiation and Intentionality with Gen Z
Ever feel like you're walking a tightrope when it comes to parenting teens? Get ready to transform that precarious walk into a confident stride as Dr. Tim Thane and I explore the art of intentional parenting. Discover how to turn your home into a hub of negotiation savvy, where business smarts…
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Brainstorm, Categorize, Trust: The New Teen Requests Approval Method
Ever wish granting your teenager's requests wasn't such a minefield? We're here to guide you through an innovative approach that starts with your teen, enabling them to brainstorm their wishes, categorize their timeframes, and understand their trustworthiness from your perspective. In this…
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10 Years of Not By Chance, the Book: More Important Today Than A Decade Ago
In this episode Tim and Roxanne celebrate 10 years of the influential book “Not By Chance.” They discuss the initial struggles of publishing the book and why they did it in the first place. Ever wondered how a book could redefine an entire field? “Not By Chance” did just that. Discover how it...
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Developing Leadership: Navigating the Challenges of a Parental Hierarchy
What if there were a way to lead your family with intention, navigating the complex dynamics of the parent-child relationship, and ultimately building a resilient bond with your teenagers? As a single parent or a member of a two-parent family, you might be seeking guidance to balance hard work…
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From Eggshells to Empowerment: The Journey Towards Proactive Parenting
Imagine holding all the keys to unlock the full potential in your children. The truth is, you do! We're here to guide you on harnessing your inherent power as a parent, an indispensable force that shapes your family's success journey and happiness. In this episode, we navigate the essence of...
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Steering the Ship: The Transformative Power of Intentional Parenting
Navigating the ever-evolving landscape of parenting can feel like braving stormy seas without a compass. Promising to be that guiding light, today's podcast explores the concept of intentional parenting, and how it can be the anchor amidst the turbulent waves of everyday challenges. Through the...
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Unraveling Parenthood: Breaking the Chains of Destructive Cycles
Do you ever feel trapped in the cycle of "good cop, bad cop" with your partner when it comes to parenting? Have you wondered how the echoes of your own upbringing have shaped the way you parent? Tag along with us as we navigate these intricate dynamics. In the authenticity of sharing my personal...
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The Healthy Results of the Controversial Authoritative Parenting
The trends around parenting swing like a pendulum from authoritarian to permissive. Instinctively we know either extremes isn't ideal, but we may not know the literature around it. Studies show that authoritative parenting produces the healthiest outcomes in teens. Authoritative can be found in...
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Hillary Weeks: "Keep Going" Musics Ability To Heal
Hilary Weeks, a top 10 Christian Billboard singer, connects with her audience by unlocking and expressing the feelings of the heart through music. Her song "Keep Going" addresses depression and has helped thousands of people individually. This interview with Hilary will make you ask how you can…
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Eric Turner: Leadership From Marine To COO
Eric Turner shares stories from his life that lead him to work at Trustyy. Coming from a family that often lived paycheck to paycheck, he joined the Marines right after high school. He got to visit home after boot camp. September 11th, 2001, he was sitting on a plane ready for takeoff when he…
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Michele Benyo: Good Grief Parenting, How To Help Your Child Deal With Loss
Michel Benyo is a grief coach. She specializes in helping Children deal with loss in their life. Having children of her own and losing one put her through a heart wrenching journey. While grieving, she learned how to help her daughter with her grief. As you listen to Michelle's stories and...
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Sherry Fernandez: Love Your Kids Hard
Sherry Fernandez was a hippy turned business woman. With insane drive and
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Dianne Kosto: How Neurofeedback Saved Her Sons Life
Dianne Kosto is a mother and CEO of Symmetry Neuro-Pathway Training. Dianne had a son who was kicked out of military school and almost kicked out of a treatment program for teen boys. She fears what could've happened if she hadn't found Neurofeedback. Neurofeedback is a non-invasive alternative…
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Pt. 5 How To Be Your Teens Number One Influencer: Story, with Roxanne Thayne
Dr. Thayne interviews his wife, Roxanne, on the power of storytelling. You must be as entertaining and compelling as your competitor (social media) to influence your teen. Become a master storyteller to encourage your teen to take action, adopt value, and come closer as a family. After this...
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Pt. 4 How to Be Your Teen's Number One Influencer: Fear
Dr. Thayne speaks about the role of fear when we are trying to be our teen's number one influencer. Fear is natural and can be healthy in doses, but when it isn't handled right, it can spiral out of control and have a domino effect on the family. Tim explains that you have to recognize the fear...
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Pt. 3 How To Be Your Teens Number One Influencer: LISTEN
Listening is one of the most influential things you could do. We might think that listening is too passive to possibly have an influence. Most of the time, however, no one cares to be swayed by someone they feel doesn't understand them. Dr. Tim Thayne gives some practical tips on how to listen to...
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Pt. 2 How to Be Your Teen’s Number One Influencer: Values
Along with being a deliberate example, parents need to be aware of the values you are modeling. Today’s episode explores some virtues that seem to be less common in today’s self-centered and fast paced world. We also discuss how to create moral literacy with stories.
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Pt. 1 How to Be Your Teens Number One Influencer: Example
Would you allow a stranger to sit on your teen's bed and talk to them for hours a day? Never. Yet this is what's happening and this is how you can put yourself back in the number one influencer position with your teen, through your deliberate, though not perfect, example.
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Are You Reading the Stories Your Teens are Writing About Themselves?
What if you could read your teen's thoughts about themselves? Would their story of their worth match yours about them? Dr. Thayne talks about how the stories we choose to tell ourselves can lead to vastly different outcomes, ranging from destructive to a springboard for success. 0:00 Intro 1:28...
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The Story of My Choice to Leave the Wilderness for Home
Dr. Thayne takes this opportunity to share with Casi Fariello of OPLM why he felt it was time to turn his attention to the needs of families after their teen's out-of-home treatment programs. He shares his journey from an owner and therapist in a wilderness treatment program, to working where the...
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The Power of Parent Support Groups: With Casie Fariello
"As we get stronger, our family gets stronger." In today's episode, Dr. Thayne introduces listeners to Casie Fariello, the CEO of "Other Parents Like Me," a virtual membership platform that went live in January of 2022. Casie retired from United Airlines after 26 years in December of 2022 to…
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The Launch: Not by Chance Yearbook, Issue 4
In this episode Dr. Thayne and Roxanne Thayne discuss the latest in the collection of Not by Chance Yearbooks. The purpose of the book is to share stories, quotes, photographs and writing prompts that encourage readers in intentional family living. This issue is focused on the theme of home…
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"THIS is Your Boundary"
Today Dr. Thayne discusses the importance of healthy boundaries and how to teach others to respect them in your home and family. Using the example of his Olde English Bulldogge puppy (Churchill), he explains how the trainer's consistency and an appropriate level of consequence are key for success...
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Dr. Timothy Smith: Connection inside the family
Dr Tim Thayne interviews Dr. Timothy Smith, a psychologist and professor of counseling psychology at Brigham Young University. As social beings, we are wired for connectivity. Dr. Smith and Dr. Thayne discuss research-based solutions for parents to deepen connections and change unhealthy patterns...
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Introduce Danger Into Their Play
In Psychologist Jordan Peterson's bestselling book, “12 Rules for Life” one rule is, “Don’t bother children when they are skateboarding.” In this episode Dr. Tim Thayne talks about the importance of introducing risk in children's play. There are numerous benefits for children when they aren’t put...
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Model Service for Your Kids
While it naturally feels good to help someone, it isn’t the most natural thing to remember to serve when we are in the midst of a struggle. So how do we teach our children to be on the lookout for service opportunities? Dr. Thayne shares a story about a mother who felt the thrill of serving a...
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Don't Procrastinate the Conversation About Tech Use in Your Home
The number one concern of our time for parents is the excessive and damaging tech use or screen time or social media that their kids are experiencing. While there are great educational options available, the toxic and dark side of the internet is a real issue. Dr. Thayne helps parents learn to…
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What Are Your Family Values?
Dr. Tim Thayne talks about a families values and how recently they haven't been emphasized. Children need to be taught what to value by their parents, the ones that love them the most. However, if they don't teach them, then the internet will. Dr. Thayne encourages parents to sit down with each...
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Launch of the Not by Chance Yearbook, Issue 3!
Join Dr. Thayne as he introduces listeners to the two editors and brains behind the beautiful and inspirational Not by Chance Yearbooks. They share the reason they chose the theme of "Preserve" for the third issue, and the stories of the traditions, memories, and relationships that are worth our...
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the Paradox of Happiness During this Christmas Season
Dr. Tim Thayne talks about the paradox of finding happiness. He shares his insights about how happiness is found when you quit looking for it and instead you start giving it to others. His story of a humble bishop serving a family in need will inspire you to look at the people in your own life…
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About this show
It’s hard to define what a successful and happy family is, much less how to achieve one. Dr. Tim Thayne, a thought-leader in teen treatment and parent coaching, shares inspiring best practices gleaned from decades of his own and other expert’s work related to intentional family living. Whether your family is in the midst of a major struggle or you are looking for fresh ideas to help you prioritize and enhance your home life, this podcast is for you.
Hosted by
Dr. Tim Thayne