Pretty and Painful

Grief isn’t always quiet.Sometimes it cries. Sometimes it isolates. And sometimes… it gets angry.In this episode of our Working Through Grief series, we’re talking about one of the most misunderstood stages of grief: the emotional outbursts, the short fuse, the moments we don’t recognize ourselves, and the guilt that often follows.What if people don’t just see you as “angry”… but they never stopped to ask if you’re hurting?Together, we’ll talk about the messy middle of healing, God’s grace in our hardest moments, taking responsibility for our actions without living in shame, and learning the difference between being a hurt person hurting people and a hurt person healing people.If you’ve ever wondered why the smallest things suddenly feel overwhelming, this episode is for you.Remember, friend…Grief grows. Without question. So will I. 🤍

WHY 🤍People ask me all the time…“Why do you keep talking about grief?”I thought I was writing an “About” page for Pretty & Painful.Instead, I discovered why this podcast exists.The answer wasn’t a perfectly written mission statement.It was one simple sentence.I miss them.And when I talk about them… they feel closer.This episode is for anyone who’s ever wondered why grief still shows up years later.For anyone who’s ever kept a handwritten recipe card.For anyone who still hears a loved one’s voice in the quiet moments.For anyone learning to let grief and joy sit at the same table.Maybe we won’t find the answer to every “why.”But maybe we’ll discover that love is reason enough to keep telling the stories.Pull up a chair.I’m so glad you’re here. 🤍#PrettyAndPainful #GriefAndJoy #HealingOutLoud #Faith #Storytelling #Remembering #Hope

The Girl You Don’t KnowThousands of people know pieces of me.The grief girl.The firefighter.The dispatcher.The BBQ queen.The loud girl.The girl who always seems to have something to say.But what about the girl behind all of that?In this episode, we’re pulling back the curtain and talking about the versions of ourselves we don’t often introduce to the world. The insecure girl. The angry girl. The exhausted girl. The one carrying shame, regrets, healing, hope, and a thousand untold stories.This isn’t the polished version.It’s not the highlight reel.It’s the chapters that happen behind closed doors, the battles nobody sees, and the truth that we are all so much more than the labels people place on us.If you’ve ever felt misunderstood, defined by your worst moments, or like nobody truly sees the whole you, pull up a chair. This conversation is for us.Because there is always more to the story than the eye shows.

Episode 36: Today, the Cake Is BitterBitterness rarely arrives all at once.It starts with a broken promise, an unanswered apology, a betrayal, a loss, or a wound that never truly healed. Before long, the hurt we’ve been carrying begins to shape the way we see people, the way we love, and even the way we see ourselves.In this episode of Pretty & Painful, we’re having an honest conversation about bitterness, pettiness, grace, and what it means to check the posture of our own hearts. Because while hurt people often hurt people, that doesn’t have to be the end of our story.We’ll talk about:* Why bitterness quietly steals our joy.* How resentment affects our relationships.* Knowing when it’s time to walk away from unhealthy people.* Choosing grace over getting even.* Finding freedom through God instead of letting pain define us.My prayer is simple: that your heart becomes lighter than it was before you pressed play.Because love was never meant to feel like a war zone.Welcome back to Pretty & Painful… where grief and joy sit at the same table.Today, the cake is bitter. 🤍

🤍 Episode 35 | I Wish They Could See ThisI catch myself saying it all the time.“I wish they could see this.”The new doors God is opening.Choosing joy on the hard days.Walking away when it’s time.Beating cancer.The perfect peanut butter cookies.Even my ginger hair… which I’m still hoping heaven lets me keep. 😉Grief has taught me something I never expected.The people we love don’t stop showing up.Sometimes it’s in a Winn-Dixie phone number that still saves me money.Sometimes it’s a run-on sentence that sounds just like someone I miss.Sometimes it’s spilled coffee by the coffee pot.Sometimes it’s a laugh, a mannerism, or a little bit of sass in someone else.Maybe they aren’t beside us anymore.But maybe little pieces of them are still all around us.And maybe that’s one of God’s sweetest gifts—that love leaves fingerprints.“We do not grieve like the rest of mankind, who have no hope.” — 1 Thessalonians 4:13Grief grows.By God’s grace… so do we.🎙️ Episode 35, “I Wish They Could See This,” is available now.Pull up a chair. I’d love to have you at the table. 🤍

Maybe birthdays after loss will never feel the way they used to.Maybe there will always be an empty chair.An unanswered phone.A name your heart still waits to hear.But love doesn’t end because a life does.The people we love keep showing up—in recipes we still make, songs we still sing, stories we still tell, and traditions we refuse to let die.So celebrate anyway.Not because grief is gone.But because love is still here.Happy Birthday to them.Thank you for loving them enough that their absence still echoes.And if today is heavy…I’m proud of you for making it through another one.I’ll meet you back here next week.Same table.Different stories.Still making room for grief and joy to sit side by side.Until then…Keep choosing love.Keep choosing grace.And keep choosing to remember.— B.

🎙️ WORKING THROUGH GRIEF: DENIALI used to tell myself my elementary school best friend wasn’t dead.She had simply gone undercover for the FBI.Delusional? Absolutely.But grief doesn’t care about logic.That’s the thing about denial nobody tells you.It’s not always refusing reality.Sometimes it’s your heart buying time.Sometimes it sounds like:“But we just talked.”“I just saw them.”“I just texted them.”As if yesterday should protect us from today.As if loss should have given us more warning.In this episode, we’re talking about the stories we tell ourselves when our hearts aren’t ready for the truth.The pretty.The painful.And the space between what our heads know and what our hearts are still learning.💛 Because sometimes denial is just love struggling to catch up with loss.#PrettyAndPainfulPodcast #WorkingThroughGrief #Denial #GriefJourney #GriefSupport #HealingOutLoud #GriefAndGrace #PodcastLife

Episode 32: Slipping Away⚠️ Content Warning: This episode discusses depression, anxiety, emotional exhaustion, and survival mode.Some episodes I show up with answers.This isn’t one of them.This week we’re talking about the quiet battles. The kind you fight while you’re still smiling. The kind nobody notices because you’re still showing up, still functioning, still carrying the weight.We’re talking about depression.Anxiety.Feeling yourself slip away while trying to convince everyone you’re okay.For the first time in a long time, I took a step back. Not because I wanted to, but because I needed to. And if you’ve ever found yourself drowning without the energy to ask for help, this episode is for you.But somewhere in the middle of the darkness, one thought kept finding me:God’s not done with me yet.So if you’re exhausted, overwhelmed, heartbroken, anxious, or simply surviving today, pull up a chair.We’ll sit in it together.Same table as alwaysBecause sometimes survival is holy too.

Working Through Grief: Episode 2 — NumbnessAfter the shock fades, something else settles in.Numbness.The silence after the phone call.The blank stare across a crowded room.The moments where you know you’re hurting, but you can’t seem to feel it.In Episode 2 of the Working Through Grief series, B opens up about the strange season that follows loss—the part where your heart builds walls to survive. The part where you’re functioning, smiling, going to work, showing up for everyone else… while feeling completely disconnected from yourself.This episode explores emotional shutdown, survival mode, and the guilt that often comes with not feeling “grief enough.” If you’ve ever wondered why you feel stuck, detached, or like part of you disappeared when they did, this conversation is for you.Because numbness isn’t the absence of grief.Sometimes it’s grief’s way of keeping you alive.Grab your coffee, your tissues, or just a quiet place to sit for a while. You’re not walking through this alone, babes.Pretty & Painful PodcastWhere grief and joy sit at the same table

Loving From a DistanceSome relationships don’t end with a slammed door.They end with a quiet realization.A realization that love and access are not the same thing.In this episode of Pretty & Painful, we’re talking about the grief that comes from loving people you can no longer do life with. The heartbreak of watching resentment, hurt, pride, and pain create distance where connection once lived.We’re talking about boundaries.Mental health.The exhausting cycle of trying to earn approval from people determined not to give it.And the freedom that comes when you finally stop carrying what was never yours to carry.This isn’t an episode about anger.It’s about peace.It’s about accepting that some roads were never meant to stay connected, and sometimes the most loving thing you can say is:“I wish you well.”Because you can love someone deeply and still choose distance.And sometimes that’s exactly what healing looks like.Pretty & Painful Podcast — Where grief and joy sit at the same table.

Babes… I can’t live, laugh, love in this economy.I can barely add to cart.This week we’re talking dopamine dressing, oversized t-shirts, Shein carts, weight loss, anxiety, reunion nerves, and the strange experience of trying to recognize yourself while you’re still growing.Somewhere between the beige trends, the bed rot, the life stress, and the “I have nothing to wear” spiral, I realized this episode isn’t really about clothes at all.It’s about identity.It’s about learning to stop waiting for the next version of yourself to arrive before allowing yourself to enjoy your life.So grab your emotional support oversized tee, your iced coffee, and maybe that leopard print you’ve been saving for a special occasion.We’re figuring out how to thrive in this economy, in this season, and in the beautiful mess of becoming ourselves.Because the algorithm says beige.But my soul says hot pink. 🩷

Sometimes grief finds us in the strangest places.A finch on a buoy.A quiet river.A memory that suddenly feels alive again.In this Table Talk episode of Pretty & Painful, we’re sharing a listener story that reminds us how deeply love lingers — even in the smallest signs. From the crystal waters of the Ichetucknee to the ache of missing someone who mattered, this episode is about connection, remembrance, and the moments that make us stop and whisper, “that had to mean something.”If you’ve ever searched for your person in sunsets, songs, birds, or still water… this one’s for you.Because grief is heavy.But sometimes healing floats quietly beside it.same table, different plates. 🩷

Shock changes people.In Episode One of the new Working Through Grief series, we’re talking about the first stage of grief — the numb, blurry, disorienting reality that comes after loss.The phone call.The hospital room.The “this can’t be real” feeling.The exhaustion.The replaying of final moments over and over again.From anticipatory grief and hospice goodbyes to sudden loss and the silence that follows, this episode is for the fresh griever, the lifelong griever, and anyone learning how to survive after goodbye.Because whether grief came instantly or slowly… it still burns like hell.🎙️ Pretty & Painful Podcast“Where grief and joy sit at the same table.”

Some days grief looks loud.Some days it just looks tired.In Episode 28 of Pretty & Painful, Bailey talks about masking, survival mode, self care, faith, flashback nights, sweet tea coping mechanisms, and learning how to carry grief without letting it harden you completely.This episode is for the people who still show up with heavy hearts.The ones forcing themselves to drink water, answer texts, pour the coffee, and keep moving even when their soul feels exhausted.From sunshine & hurricanes… to sweet tea & survival… to realizing God still meets us in the mess before the healing ever fully arrives — this one is soft, honest, Southern, and deeply human.Because grief is a lot like coffee.Sometimes bitter.Sometimes sweet.Sometimes watered down.Sometimes strong enough to wake you up all over again.And somehow… we still keep pouring another cup. ☕🩷Pretty & Painful Podcast“Still Pouring the Coffee”Episode 28

Episode 27 — “i saw you today”Sometimes grief doesn’t crash through the front door.Sometimes it pulls up beside you at a gas pump under a red sunset sky and steals the air right out of your lungs.Today I saw a stranger…but for a second, my heart swore it was you.This episode is about the weirdness of grief — the double takes, the familiar faces, the moments that feel like warm hugs and heartbreak all at once. The kind of grief that sneaks up on you when you thought you were finally okay.We’re talking about longing, memories, signs, God’s timing, and learning how to carry love for people who are no longer standing beside us physically… but somehow still show up everywhere.Because sometimes healing looks like laughing one day…and crying at strangers the next.Pretty & Painful Podcast — where grief and joy still sit at the same table. 🩷

I found myself asking a question lately that honestly felt a little embarrassing to say out loud:“Why are they so nice to me?”Not fake nice.Not performative nice.Not nice with hidden intentions attached to it.I mean genuine kindness.Patience.Gentleness.The kind of love that doesn’t keep score.And maybe that question says more about what I’ve survived than anything else.In Episode 26 of Pretty & Painful, we’re talking about what happens when you’ve spent so long living around criticism, tension, conditional love, and survival mode… that healthy love almost feels uncomfortable.Because when you’re used to walking on eggshells, kindness can feel confusing.This episode is about healing through people who love differently.People who choose softness.People who reflect God without needing a stage to do it.Maybe real faith looks less like perfection and more like how we treat hurting people.And maybe for the first time in a long time…I’m learning that love was never supposed to hurt this much to be real.Episode 26 — Why Are They So Nice? 💗

Episode 25 of Pretty & Painful is for the girl who still cringes at old Facebook memories, old choices, old relationships, old coping mechanisms… and forgets she was surviving the best way she knew how.This episode is about grace.Not just the kind God gives us — but the kind we struggle to give ourselves.Bailey opens up about grieving old versions of herself, carrying shame for seasons she barely survived, battling grief, depression, pain, and feeling far from God… while learning that healing doesn’t mean pretending the past never happened. It means realizing the girl you used to be still deserves compassion too.Because maybe she wasn’t weak.Maybe she was exhausted.Maybe she was drowning.Maybe she was doing everything she could just to stay alive.This episode is raw, reflective, faith-filled, and honest — for anyone trying to stop hating who they had to become in order to survive.“God makes all things new… and that includes me.”Pretty & Painful PodcastWhere grief and joy sit at the same table.

Hindsight is 20/20… but sometimes our vision isn’t.In Episode 24 of Pretty & Painful, Bailey dives into blurry seasons — the moments we ignored red flags, drifted from ourselves, questioned God’s timing, or got so lost in survival mode that we stopped seeing clearly.This episode is about slow blooming, spiritual burnout, hindsight, grace, and learning that healing doesn’t always happen all at once. Sometimes God meets us quietly… in the stillness, in the flowers blooming slowly, and in the moments we finally stop running long enough to listen.If you’ve ever felt spiritually squinty, emotionally exhausted, or stuck between grief and growth — pull up a chair.Because even with blurry vision… grace still sees us clearly.🌸 Faith. Healing. Hindsight. Grace

Borrowing joy until you can hold your own again.Maybe grief made your hands too heavy to carry happiness for a while.Maybe watching everyone else heal, grow, fall in love, laugh, and live felt easier than figuring out how to do it yourself.But somewhere along the way…their joy reminded me mine still existed too.And babes?I spent so long wondering if I even deserved a seat at the table…until I realized:I am the table. ✨🎙️ Pretty & Painful PodcastWhere grief and joy sit at the same table.

Some fires don’t happen all at once.Sometimes they spark slowly.A bad season.A hard goodbye.A little grief.A little healing.A little chaos wrapped up in confidence and sarcasm.In this episode of Pretty & Painful, we’re talking about dumpster fire moments, emotional cleanup jobs, the people God sends into your life at the right time, and learning that being “hauled, not healed” doesn’t mean you’re broken beyond repair.Because maybe healing isn’t always soft.Maybe sometimes it looks like sparks flying, smoke everywhere, and still finding a way to laugh through it.✨ Hauled, Not Healed: Sparks & Sass🎙 Pretty & Painful Podcast“Where grief and joy sit at the same table.”

Episode 21 — the one someone buysI thought he was going to give me specs & storage… but turns out it was never really about the iPad.This episode is about what happens when you realize being “chosen” and being truly valued are two very different things. The gifts, the gestures, the convenience of having someone around — and the quiet ache of wondering if they actually see you underneath it all.We’re talking relationships, emotional availability, soft life illusions, and the difference between being loved loudly… and being loved well.Because babes, it’s more than an iPad.It’s about feeling worthy without having to earn it.✨ Pretty & Painful — where grief, growth & gloss sit at the same table.

“Too much… or just finally honest?”This episode is for the ones who have been called too much.Too loud.Too emotional.Too honest.In this raw, unfiltered episode of Pretty & Painful, Bailey opens up about grief, healing out loud, and the reality of being misunderstood in a world that prefers things quiet and palatable.From accusations of “doing it for attention” to choosing what parts of her story stay private, this is a conversation about identity, growth, and refusing to shrink for anyone.Because not all healing is quiet.And not everyone is meant to understand you.✨ If you came here for quiet… you picked the wrong table.

Not everything is magically okay…but something feels different.In this episode of Pretty & Painful, I’m opening up about what it looks like when the blinders finally come off—when grief is still there, but it doesn’t feel quite as heavy.This isn’t me saying I’m done healing.This isn’t me ignoring the hard.This is me learning… I’m not alone in it.Through faith, through growth, and through the quiet moments in between—I’m starting to see things clearer. Finding pieces of myself again. Even something as simple as getting dressed and feeling like me… that matters.Because maybe goodbye here…isn’t goodbye forever.You’ve got a seat at my table—through the grief, the hard days, and the pretty too. And I believe there’s one waiting for us in heaven.Grief. Growth. Gloss.A little more pretty… and a little less painful.

Some places don’t change…but the way they feel does.This episode is about going back—back to the places that raised you,the memories that shaped you,and the people who aren’t there anymore.It’s about expecting comfort…and being met with silence.About realizing that healing doesn’t always look like closure—sometimes it looks like sitting in the middle of what once was,and choosing to stay anyway.Because even when it wasn’t the same…there was still something there.Still pieces of love.Still glimpses of who you used to be.Still proof that you made it through.This one is for the moments that feel different,for the memories that hit a little deeper,and for anyone learning how to find happinessin places that don’t feel like home anymore.✨ Pretty & Painful — where grief and joy sit at the same table…and sometimes, we’re still learning how to pull up a chair.

⸻God Met Me HereI didn’t find God in a perfect moment.I didn’t find Him when everything made sense.I found Him… here.In the middle of the messy.The grief.The questions I didn’t have answers for.This episode is about the kind of faith that doesn’t look polished—the kind that shows up in quiet prayers,in car rides with tears you didn’t plan,in moments where all you can say is,“God… I need You.”Because somehow…in the middle of everything I thought would break me—He met me there.Not when I had it all together.Not when I felt strong.But right in the middle of where I was.And maybe that’s what this space is.A table God let me set.A chair He keeps pulling out for you.A place where I get to share what He’s done in me—through the pain, the growth, and everything in between.If you’ve ever wondered if God still shows up…even here…He does.✨ Pretty & Painful — where grief and joy sit at the same table…and sometimes, that’s exactly where God meets us.

Driftwood — BFFs & Suwannee RiverWe didn’t drift… we just took the scenic route back.In this episode, it’s Bay & Shay—back in Florida, back by the water, and back in the kind of friendship that doesn’t need explaining.We’re talking growing up, growing apart, growing back together…and how the real ones don’t disappear—they just float steady until you find each other again.A little nostalgia.A little chaos.A lot of love.Because some friendships aren’t fragile—they’re built like driftwood…weathered, worn, and still floating like they own the river.Where grief and joy sit at the same table…and this time, we brought sweet tea.

This episode feels a little softer… but no less real.I’m sitting at the table with memories of my Aunt Judi — the kind of woman who wasn’t for everyone, but meant everything to the people she loved. The one who could bring sweetness into chaos, whether it was through her voice on dispatch or something homemade in her hands.Today feels like a bake sale kind of day…warm, familiar, a little bittersweet.We’re talking about the people who loved us in loud, quiet, and sometimes misunderstood ways — and how their love still shows up, even after they’re gone.If you’ve ever missed someone who made life feel a little brighter…pull up a chair.You’re not alone at this table. 🩷

Healing Isn’t Quiet — April 19thWarning: This episode discusses personal experiences with sexual trauma and healing.Listener discretion is advised—please take care of yourself while listening.This episode is personal.Not for attention. Not for opinions.But because healing doesn’t happen in silence.April 19th, 2017 changed me.Not just in a moment… but in the way I saw myself, my body, and the world around me.For a long time, I carried questions that were never mine to hold.I questioned my outfit. My smile. My existence in that moment.I carried what happened…and I carried how people responded to it.The disbelief.The blame.The silence.This episode isn’t about detaiIt’s about what comes after.The anxiety.The way your body remembers.The way you learn to exist again.And slowly…the way you start to heal.I’m not perfectly healed.I still have hard days.But I’m not living in fear anymore.And that matters.If you’ve ever been through something like this—you are not alone.It was never your fault.This is me choosing to speak.This is me choosing to heal… out loud.

Same table. Different plates.This Table Talk holds stories that don’t always get said out loud — the kind that change you.From loving someone who broke you…to learning how to live with the parts they left behind.These aren’t perfect stories.They’re real ones.About losing yourself in relationships…finding your way back…and unlearning the things that made you question your worth.If you’ve ever loved deeply, stayed too long, or are still healing from something you don’t talk about—there’s a seat for you here.

In this episode, I’m talking about what it feels like to outgrow a version of yourself…that people refuse to let go of.The girl who was loud.The girl who reacted.The girl they labeled… and never updated.Because growth is a weird place to be.You’re not who you used to be…but people still treat you like you are.This is about:✨ Healing without explaining yourself✨ Letting people misunderstand you—and being okay with it✨ Rebuilding your life without asking for permission✨ And learning that maybe… you were never “too much"Just someone who needed to be seen… the right way.If you’ve ever felt stuck in a reputation you’ve already outgrown…This one’s for you.🎙️ Pretty & PainfulWhere grief and joy sit at the same table…and sometimes, healing sounds like letting them be wrong about you.

Grief doesn’t come with a timeline…and it sure doesn’t ask for permission to stay.Some days you’re okay.Some days it hits you out of nowhere — years later — like it just happened.And somewhere along the way, the world starts expecting you to be “over it.”This episode?This is your permission slip.To still miss them.To still feel it.To still carry love that didn’t have anywhere to go.Because grieving for years doesn’t make you broken…it means you loved deeply.🎙️ Sorrow Into Story — Normalizing GriefPretty & Painful PodcastWhere grief and joy sit at the same table…and sometimes, healing doesn’t look like moving on —it looks like learning how to carry it differently.

A Life I Don’t Need to Escape FromThere was a time I was always looking for a way out.Not physically…but mentally.Scrolling.Staying busy.Filling every quiet momentso I didn’t have to sit with myself.Because if I’m honest…my life didn’t feel like somewhere I wanted to stay.But somewhere along the way…that started to change.Not in a big, dramatic way—but in the small, quiet choices.Learning how to sit in my life.Learning how to soften.Learning how to find peacein places I used to try to escape.This episode is about what happenswhen you stop running…and start building a lifeyou actually want to be present in.If you’ve ever felt overwhelmed, disconnected,or like you’re constantly trying to escape your own life—this one’s for you.You’re not behind.You’re not broken.You’re just learning how to stay.🎙️ Pretty & Painful PodcastWhere grief and joy sit at the same table…and sometimes, healing looks like staying.

For the first time, it’s not just my story.It’s hers.It’s yours.It’s what happens when we stop carrying things alone.From loss… to boundaries… to choosing peace—this episode is a reminder that healing doesn’t look one way, and it doesn’t happen overnight.But progress is still progress.And your story might be the lifeline someone else needs.🎙️ A Seat at the TablePretty & Painful PodcastWhere grief and joy sit at the same table…and now, so do we. 🩷

You don’t realize it at first…but we spend our whole lives watching.As kids, we watch the people we love—how they live, how they speak, how they carry themselves.And one day…we watch them leave.This episode is about grief, growth, and the quiet realization that the way we heal… is being watched too.I wasn’t always soft.I wasn’t always healing.But somewhere between the pain, the silence, and finding my voice again—I realized this life isn’t just about me anymore.She’s watching.And maybe you are too.If you’ve ever felt numb, lost, or like parts of you didn’t make it through what you’ve been through…this one’s for you.🎙️ Pretty & Painful PodcastWhere grief and joy sit at the same table…and somehow, we’re still here.

I used to think romanticizing your life meant pretending everything was okay…Now I know—it’s how you survive when it’s not.This episode is for the ones carrying grief quietly…still lighting candles, still choosing softness, still showing up.Because maybe healing isn’t loud—maybe it looks like love, little moments… and a touch of Easter grace. 🌷🎙️ Romanticizing My Life… Even When It’s Falling ApartPretty & Painful Podcast

I spent a long time thinking I needed the last word…like if I could just explain myself one more time,defend myself a little better,or finally be understood… it would fix something.But it never did.Because the truth is—not everyone is meant to understand you.And not every situation deserves your voice.This episode is about letting go of the need to be heard by people who were never really listening…and finding peace in the silence you used to be afraid of.It’s about choosing healing over proving,walking away without the final say,and realizing that closure doesn’t always come with a conversation.Sometimes… it comes with you deciding you’re done.If you’ve ever felt misunderstood,like you had to fight to be seen,or like you needed the last word just to feel okay…this one’s for you.

This one’s not easy to say out loud…There was a version of me that didn’t love right.I kept people close—but never close enough.I controlled everything.I broke hearts… to protect my own.Not because I was heartless—but because I was scared of how deeply I could feel.In this episode, I’m opening up about the walls I built, the damage I did, and what it actually looked like to take accountability and change.Because healing isn’t always pretty.Sometimes it’s realizing you were the one hurting people…and choosing to do better anyway.This is about learning how to love without losing yourself.About softening… without becoming weak.And understanding that maybe…you weren’t “too much.”You were just loving from a place that needed healing.

Welcome back to Pretty & Painful — where grief and joy sit at the same table… even when the table feels like it’s on fire.This week, we’re talking about those seasons where everything hits at once.The kind that leave you numb, overwhelmed, and wondering how you’re supposed to keep going.Less sparkle. Less sass.More honesty. More survival.Because not every chapter is a glow up.Some are just about making it through.And if that’s where you are right now…I see you. I’m in it too.

Some days, it’s not sadness.It’s not anger.It’s just… nothing.In this episode of Pretty & Painful, I’m talking about the numbness—the kind that makes you feel like a stranger in your own life. The kind where you’re still showing up, still smiling, still doing what needs to be done… but inside, everything feels quiet.This isn’t a “I have it all together” episode.This is real. This is right now.We’re talking about burnout, heartbreak, emotional exhaustion, and what it looks like to keep going when you don’t feel like yourself.If you’ve been in that in-between space… not okay, but not falling apart either—this one’s for you.Because even here… you’re still here. And that counts.

Some connections in life are easy.Some are tangled.And some… feel like invisible strings pulling us exactly where we’re meant to be.In this episode of Pretty & Painful, Bailey talks about the friendships that shape us—the ones that appear out of nowhere, the ones that hold us together through grief, and the ones that stretch across states, years, and life chapters. From unexpected best friends to soul-deep bonds that feel braided into who we are, this episode explores how some strings loosen… while others hold tighter than ever.Because not every connection is meant to last forever.But the ones that do?They help carry us through the pain and into the pretty. ✨

What starts as a frustrated joke about a broken Jeep quickly turns into real flames.In this episode of Pretty & Painful, Bailey shares the moment she went from being the responder… to being the call. From smoke behind the tire to the quiet crash of adrenaline afterward, this story explores guilt, chaos, and the strange feeling of needing help when you’re usually the one giving it.Because sometimes grief, humor, and healing all end up at the same table…even if the table’s on fire. 🔥🎙️

What happens when you leave the place that raised you… and have to decide where you’re going to plant yourself next?In this episode of Pretty & Painful, Bailey talks about being rooted — not stuck. Not small. Not silenced. Rooted.From small-town football nights and Hardee’s parking lot conversations to finding belonging in new soil… this one is about identity, grief, growth, and what it means to build a life that feels like yours.It’s about missing family milestones because of night shifts.Driving a fire truck when generations of men did it before you.Being 5’11 and still tripping — but getting back up anyway.Loving your body while still wanting to be healthier.Building magic for your daughter while quietly carrying your own pain.This episode is for the woman who:​ feels behind​ feels overwhelmed​ feels like she’s failing​ but hasn’t quitYou can be tired and rooted.You can grieve and grow.You can miss home and still build a new one.Bailey shares what it’s looked like to survive cancer, navigate guilt, show up imperfectly as a mom, balance dispatch life and fire calls, and still whisper to herself:“I’m still here… and that’s good.”If you’ve ever wondered whether you’re doing enough — this one’s for you.🌿 Rooted doesn’t mean buried.It means you’re planted on purpose.

Turns out remission doesn’t come with a glitter cannon.And grief doesn’t leave quietly.But somewhere between carrot cake recipes, decorating therapy, and my daughter asking, “Mom, can we make peanut butter cookies?” … I found pieces of myself again.This episode is about personality coming back online.About laughing without guilt.About being allowed to sparkle after survival.I’m still baking.Still accessorizing.Still healing.Still sassin’.And if you’re in your comeback season too — pull up a chair.

Grief doesn’t always whisper — sometimes it keeps baking, keeps winning bingo, keeps showing up.In Episode 2 of Pretty & Painful, Bailey talks about celebrating the ones we’ve lost while honoring the generational strength that teaches us to survive heartbreak. From peanut butter cookies to hospital rooms, from Grandma’s resilience to Grandpa’s absence — this episode is raw, tender, and deeply human.Because grief is painful.But it’s also proof of love.

Yellow was never just a color — it was my Grandpa’s phone, the one he called “my yellow.” In this episode, I share what it’s like to lose the person who was always your call away and learn how grief quietly changes everything.From hospital rooms and final goodbyes to finding joy in the everyday again, this episode is about love, loss, and carrying someone with you even when the phone goes silent.Welcome to Pretty & Painful. 💛