PODCAST · society
Queen Cattis: Finding my voice
by Alvhild Catarina Jansdotter
Well here I am, rambling away with no script, as will happen at times. I really want to podcast and I am just trying out how it feels. In this episode I introduce my thoughts and feelings on why I need to express myself in this way and I think it might be relevant to people who share my interests and enjoy my musings as well as follow my journey of voice feminization. Enjoy!!
Episodes
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Episode 54: Escalation and chaos in the World of Darkness
Another very larpy episode because we love those. I am back with Dallas and this time we bring Linus, another larper who plays the baron Lucian and we speak about the chaos that has escalated for the season finale of this epic story!
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Episode 53: wine and Hormones
The pod back from a long pause! This is a weird episode, but a very important one. Dallas is back along with another friend, Alex, who we LARP with. Alex is a trans man, and we discuss something that is rarely talked about but is something very relevant for trans people beginning their…
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Episode 52: Blood, Wine and Tears
Dallas is back, and again, we spek about the LARP we attend. (Live Action Role Play where we, together with a large group of players, play our vampire characters in a serial monthly format) We speak of how Dallas’ character Tempest’s backstory is becoming a great story in its own right, we speak…
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Episode 51: Bleed
Dallas is back, and after talking about her allyship and learning experiences on the topic. Then we gush about the Vampire LARP we spoke of last time, discussing my fourth and her second session. At the end we speak about a topic that needs to be talked about more. After very emotionally intense...
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Episode 50: Let it out
If you hadn’t noticed, I love playing out emotions in roleplaying. In this episode I muse a bit about what crying brings me when I play. Spoiler: It’s awesome!
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Episode 49: Dallas embraced
So I finally have my friend Dallas on an episode, and in the same room no less! Dallas has finally joined the wonderful world of roleplaying and she starts on the deep side of the pool with a vampire larp (Live action roleplay) set in the World of Darkness using setting from Vampire the…
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Episode 48: Peas in a pod
This is a very special episode, and, as promised, all about roleplaying. My friend Nicole who I roleplay with a lot is a quest, we talk about how we met and how our roleplaying dynamics work. She plays the character Juniper in the Tyranny of Dragons campaign I have mentioned a few times on this...
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Epidsode 47: Escape
I speak about something very happy going on in Sweden right now, with state funded transphobia. But I also speak of the silver lining and the things that help us through it. Trigger warning; talk of suicide.
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Episode 46: Main character witch hunt
I speak about a cool transition related dream I had last night, and the interesting conclusion I drew from it. I also talk about a bit of a hot-take; I think the the hunt for main character syndrome in TTRPGs has gone way too far.
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Episode 45: In it together
We’re all in this world together. In this episode I give my love to the wonderful loud allies of trans people, and, by extension, every othered and villfiied minority. I also speak of the loud toxic minority in my favorite hobby – gatekeepers in roleplaying. Can I have a boo and a hiss?
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Episode 44: Matters of the heart
I talk about love and sexuality, both transition-related and roleplay related. I speak about what I think of labels when it comes to sexual preferences and what transitioning has done to mine. I speak about a romance-related cunundrum I am experiencing at the moment, something I would like people...
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Episode 43: Enter the world
I talk about the chemical progress of my Hormone Replacement Therapy as the real me is “Entering the world”. I also speak about how I feel like some limitations to freedom can help make roleplaying games more immerisve, I use my own project as an example.
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Episode 42: Everything
In this one I give a little rant. I often get asked what I would like cis people knew about the trans experience and here it is. A lot of even well emaning cis people have trouble with this, but PLEASE make an effort to understand – REALLY understand the nature of being NOT BECOMING trans. I…
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Episode 41: Progress report
I am back from summer holiday and I was blown away by how much my voice has changed since I started this podcast! I also speak about how culture in roleplaying games has improved my experience. I read a scene I wrote down from the session I played from the One Ring roleplaying game, read like an...
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Episode 40: Backstory – The Storm
I am taking two weeks off, but enjoy this backstory of Sophilde, the character that was interviewed in the previous episode. I really like her story, but keep in mind, it is quite dark and I would like warn about fictional suicidal thoughts – if these are triggering to you, please skip this...
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Episode 39: Interview with the edgy one
I go into character and answer some interview-questions from roleplayingtips.com. I talk as Sophlide, my problematic storm sorceress. Next week I will give you her backstory. Enjoy!
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Episode 38: Absolute Euphoria
No roleplay talk today. Just wonderful wonderful news about me and my transition. I will be getting diagnosed, I am feeling more free in my voice, and pride, oh my gosh pride. Listen for some pure trans joy, and of course a sonnet. This sonnet. The strides I’ve taken cannot be denied, Look down…
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Episode 37: The Queen Speaks
I performed at my friends recital of her new book, where I portrayed Queen Mariel, a character from the upcoming fantasy novel Threads of Blood by Dallas De Fée. I had a great time, and I want to describe the similarities between immersive roleplaying and acting as it became very clear to me.…
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Episode 36: Life & Unlife
I have wonderful news about my trans journey, followed by wonderful news about my hobby. I have just just started LARPing Vampire: the Masquerade again! I am so happy I could cry. Be warned, in this episode I drink champagne and eat cheese so there is some nomming to be heard.
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Episode 35: Over My Head
I hit a milestone, people. Someone tried to pick me up in a bar! And I remained completely and utterly oblivious until my friend pointed it out afterwards. After talking a bit about that I re-visit the idea of playing a child in TTRPGs as I talk a bit about my new sassy tabazi teenages…
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Episode 34: Conclusion, kind of
I rehearse my voice work, as was the entire point of this podcast, and then I conclude the backstory of my paladin of friendship I began in episode 32. There will be more episodes as I have started writing chapters of our game sessions. Do you want more of these? Tell me and it just might happen....
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Episode 33: Lasers and notes
This is a quick episode where I talk about my first laser hair removal treatment, followed by how the note taking of my roleplaying with the purpose of recording the story for prosperity has effected my immersion. Next week it’s back to story time!
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Episode 32: Neverending backstory
So now this podcast is pretty much an audio book. I read two parts of my three part backstory for the character i play in the Tyranny of Dragons for Dungeons & Dragons 5E. I know I promised all three, but I got a little overwhelmed aloing the way. I will add the last part in a future episode, as...
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Episode 31: Tears in rain
In this episode I try an experiment. I have been playing around with ChatGPT and roleplaying matierial, namely filling out parts of my backstory that my character should not have had complete control over. This has worked well for me but just for fun, I decided to see what happens if I let…
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Epoisode 30: Voices from beyond the grave
Some more voicework, the squeaky-exercise and some goods news about me overpowering my voice dysphoria somewhat. I also announce that I am going back into LARPing (Live Action RolePlay) and talk about my process in making an interesting vampire character to play in a LARP. As my character is…
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Episode 29: Gothcon, baby!
Listen to me ramble and gush about my experience at this year’s gothcon, an annual convention for people who enjoy roleplaying games, tactical card games, and board games etc. etc. I speak of the games I played, speaking with TTRPG creators and some hints of my own projects, as well as some...
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Episode 28: The good, the bad and the girly
Bad things happen and that sucks. But sometimes you find a lot of good things within the bad things. After my transition related story I lift the question of nurturing conflicts between player characters roleplaying parties – why is it awesome and how does it work in the long run? Warning: there...
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Episode 27: Secrets revealed!
A quick little episode about the importance of communicating things that would be pretty darn good to know! Both in life and in roleplaying! Listen to this if you are a roleplayer and/or have wavy hair. Especially if you are a trans woman with wavy hair! #gamechanger
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Episode 26: The pursuit of knowledge
I answer a list of trans realted questions from the meme I refer to in the About Me section of my blog. I hope that helps some cis people get a basic understanding and that it’s entertaining. I explain my plans of having my roleplaying characters interviewed in the future, a wonderful experiment...
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Episode 25: Coming out
In this episode I give you a list of some of my many coming out stories, as requested by a listener. I also talk about my Forbidden Lands character Tireana, and how her experience helped teach the entire group about dysphoria before I even out to them! Enjoy! Art by Coffeejelly.
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Episode 24: Dungeons & Dysphoria
In this episode I try to explain gender dysphoria in a way to maybe help cis people have a better understanding of what it means to be trans. Obviosuly not all trans people are dysphoric, but I hope this helps shed some light on the nature of identity that can be hard for someone who has never…
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Episode 23: To push or not to push
You get some more information about my oh so edgy character Sophilde, a character designed to need an intervention for bad behaviour, another accidental coming out story and I speak about the complicated question of when is it ok to push or encourage your closeted friends to come out? Is it ever?...
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Episode 22: The best intentions
In this episode I explain something about pronouns, something that is often missed by well meaning allies. You might need to hear this. Then I put some more character driven detail in the series of events I went through with Karl in last week’s episode. As we decided we should talk through the...
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Episode 21: Game mastering with emotional impact
I speak to my friend and Game Master Karl Wictorin, the man who assigned the character Alvhild to me, as I explaine din Episode 2 – the Magic of Names. He came on to talk about his game mastering technique but we went off on a tangent reliving the start of that magical campaign. If you want to…
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Episode 20: Ye Olde Tropes – You meet in a tavern
In defence of an old pet peeve of a lot of roleplayers. A bit of a hot take to some, but here I explain why I think a tavern is a fine place to start, as long as you’ve done the rest of the ground work. Today’s sonnet: One fateful day six souls did start, Some went for honour, some for gold…
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Episode 19: Growing Past Our Faults
I speak about my personal development, and faults that I, myself am proud of getting over. I also speak of how this is a kind of growth we should all strive for, not just in life but in roleplay as well. Once again I let my young character Alvhild speak, and she tells of the day she put her...
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Episode 18: The Epic Team-up Episode
In this one I speak with my friend Emmanuel, who is transmasc and a roleplayer. We speak about how his experience is different from mine, and we go onto to meeting as our characters. Me as Sipphire, and him as his changeling character Nyx. I might be slightly tipsy and we do waffle on in…
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Episode 17: Praise where praise is due
Here I cover some really nice things I have noticed after coming home to my side of the field, so to speak. I also speak about how we all are responsible for making this world the best it can be, and when we appreciate someone, speak up. And role players; never forget to thank your game master....
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Epiosde 16: A tale of two social constructs
In this episode I answer the question, what does it mean to speak of gender as a social construct. That is a big issue but I try to explain it as quickly as I can before moving on to the controversies that have set our wonderful hobby ablaze, the new supposed update to the Open Game License of...
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Episode 15: There Are No Words So Sing My Joyful Tears
Happy New Year 2023 everybody! In this episode I share some pure trans joy. Not a lot of talk about roleplaying but if you like happiness, trust me, you’ll want to hear this. There will be more nerdy stuff next week, I promise! Today’s sonnet: A year of many horrors and despair, With cruelty and...
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Episode 14: Duality of Nails
I wasn’t going to record an episode this week but here we are. Something came up and I just had to talk about it. I am sure you will understand why. You will hear me introduce myself myself as my Dungeons & Dragons-character Cassandra Lagrandia, Half-elf wild sorceress. Also, I got my nails done!...
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Episode 13: Seeing myself at last
This is about the feeling of seeing myself for the first time. It’s hard to explain to a cis person, but give it a listen and I hope it helps. I also explain how I’ve been a dumb-dumb, writing my sonnets all wrong, but with a silver lining! And give you two sonnets this week, and this time they…
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Episode 12: Backstories & Becoming the Character
How I learned to use my dysphoria to improve my acting and roleplaying and how you could potentially use the same ideas to bring new levels of life to your imaganitaion. I introduce my new character from Vaesen, Ingalill Sifsdotter, whom I plan to start playing in early 2023. This week’s sonnet…
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Episode 11: Playing child characters in TTRPGs
I start with describing another encounter with everyday sexism, something that was, of course, expected but I still find my perspective interesting. For those who think sexism is a myth, trans people are a great resource since we tend to experience things more than one part of the gender…
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Episode 10: Broken promises and lost hope
So here is that mini rant I promised you, about how Sweden has zero respect for the autonomy of our identites and has no interest in changing that, in spite of promises to the contrary. Following the rant, my 13 year old character Alvhild, my namesake that I introduced in Episode 2, the Magic of...
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Episode 9: A Passing Surprise & a Princess Diary
A fantastic thing happened to me yesterday when I was picking up the new microphone I am reviewing for www.myogaming.se (a Swedish site). Listen to hear my euphoria! Someone asked a question to one of my characters, which she answers followed by a related poem! Left to right: Septimer/Sapphire,...
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Episode 8: The Princess & the Witch
This episode starts with a quick bit about me facing the world and its perception of me and then I go into introducing two of my characters in first person as an experiment to see if I sound different even when not really thinking about my voice from an outside perspective. The characters are...
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Episode 7: Double hot take; Pockets & Edgelords
In this episode I talk about being validated by negative things, such as lack of pockets in feminine clothing. I then go onto defending tragic backstories and the dreaded edgelord. Are they as bad as everyone says or is there more to it? The meme in question: The symabroum character Vidina: Art…
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Episode 6: Hot take; Nerf the healers
My experience in updating my name with the bank left me a bit annoyed. Still a good day but giver it a listen and I will explain what troubled me and how we can improve the situation. And my roleplaying hot take is one that has sparked many arguments but I will die on this hill! And yes I know…
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Episode 5: Facing transphobia
I had a bit of a day, well, a couple of days. I need to vent a bit about transphobia so this is the most unscipted I have ever been. There are good things too obviously and of course I am still ending with some poetry! Thank you all for listening! Today’s sonnets: 1 Outside my window staring in...
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ABOUT THIS SHOW
Well here I am, rambling away with no script, as will happen at times. I really want to podcast and I am just trying out how it feels. In this episode I introduce my thoughts and feelings on why I need to express myself in this way and I think it might be relevant to people who share my interests and enjoy my musings as well as follow my journey of voice feminization.
Enjoy!!
HOSTED BY
Alvhild Catarina Jansdotter
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Frequently Asked Questions
How many episodes does Queen Cattis: Finding my voice have?
Queen Cattis: Finding my voice currently has 54 episodes available on PodParley. New episodes are automatically indexed when they're published to the podcast feed.
What is Queen Cattis: Finding my voice about?
Well here I am, rambling away with no script, as will happen at times. I really want to podcast and I am just trying out how it feels. In this episode I introduce my thoughts and feelings on why I need to express myself in this way and I think it might be relevant to people who share my interests...
How often does Queen Cattis: Finding my voice release new episodes?
Queen Cattis: Finding my voice has 54 episodes. Check the episode list to see recent publication dates and frequency.
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You can listen to Queen Cattis: Finding my voice on PodParley by clicking any episode. We provide an embedded audio player for direct listening, and you can also subscribe via your preferred podcast app using the RSS feed.
Who hosts Queen Cattis: Finding my voice?
Queen Cattis: Finding my voice is created and hosted by Alvhild Catarina Jansdotter.
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