Raised by Rentals

In World War II, the tides of victory shifted with the success of D-Day…not an invasion, but the arrival of the American super-soldier COLONEL D-DAY and his elite force of living weapons. But what happens to war heroes when the war is over? Tune in for the first episode in our SUPER SECRET IDENTITY TWO-IN-ONE SPECIAL to find out what happens when an aging icon realizes that he's NOBODY'S HERO.

Once upon a time, Sarah wished for the Goblin King to take away her annoying baby brother…and immediately regretted it when her wish came true. Through dangers untold and hardships unnumbered, she fought her way to the castle beyond the Goblin City, took back the child, and learned an important lesson about growing up. But she shouldn't have taken for granted that everyone would live happily ever after, because things aren't always what they seem in the LABYRINTH.

Is there something the people in your life treat as normal and expected—but you just don’t give a $#!% about? For pop culture fans, it can be tough to admit when we don't like something everyone else takes for granted as awesome. So for the first RENTAL RANT of Season 5, it's high time for some hot takes…even if it stirs up an angry mob demanding to see our NERD CARDS REVOKED!

Arbor Day is a time to give back a little of nature's bountiful gifts by celebrating the earth and planting trees…but when the ground is sour, evil runs deep in the roots. Gather 'round the campfire with us for a tale of sylvan beauty blighted by the horror of an ARBOR DAY MASSACRE!

What would you do if you were stuck in one place and every day was exactly the same, and nothing that you did mattered? For this episode, join us in the existential time loop of history repeating itself with a rare Bill Murray sequel: GROUNDHOG DAY 2!

In the 80s, when trading cards and silly novelty toys were all the rage, one fad captured the imagination--and the gag reflex--of kids like no other. So of course adapting it to a feature film would be a big hit…right? In this episode, we carefully traverse the trash-heaped back-alley switchbacks of memory lane to imagine THE GARBAGE PAIL KIDS MOVIE that should have been.

Attention, students! This Super Gushers special is Storytelling 101. Everyone take your seats and sharpen your pencils, because class is in session with your pals Unc and Jefe.

What do Die Hard, The Lost Boys, and Mrs. Doubtfire have in common with Pong? You'll have to listen to find out! For the premiere episode of RAISED BY RENTALS Season 5, we try our hands at the age-old series trope of THE CLIP SHOW CLICHÉ.

The holidays are in full swing, which means it’s time to wrap up Season 4! Get it? Like wrapping up a gift? Because it’s Christmas? Geez, tough crowd… For the last episode of the year, join us while we reminisce about our favorite holiday movies and music, review this year’s episodes, and super-gush about all the reasons WE LOVE CHRISTMAS!

Christmas may only come once a year but nothing can stop JUERGEN THE YULETIDE AVENGER from returning again to punish all the naughty boys and girls! It's a threequel threat this episode with guest Samm Grandquist (WNY Horror Krue) and another festive family tale of holiday horror.

It's Christmastime once again, so of course JUERGEN THE YULETIDE AVENGER must return! Friend of the podcast Samm Grandquist also returns this episode, to join us in a tale of spreading holiday cheer…across the walls with a battleaxe!

Thanksgiving is the season for family, appreciation, and…perving on the girl next door?! This episode, join us as we give thanks for the horny hilarity and horror of the boy cursed with TURKEY HANDS!

When the League of Arnies is jeopardized by the return of a powerful enemy, they send their most versatile variant on a perilous mission across worlds. Trapped in other realities, ARNOLD SCHWARZENEGGER finds himself leaping from life to life, putting things right that once went wrong and hoping each time that his next leap will be the leap home…

On Halloween night, the Great Pumpkin rises out of his pumpkin patch and flies through the air with his bag of toys for all the children…or at least that’s what Linus van Pelt believed. But after years of waiting in the pumpkin patch and missing trick or treats, could he remain sincere? To cap off this year’s spooky season, we celebrate the first and best Halloween TV special and ask ourselves: Does Linus still believe in THE GREAT PUMPKIN?

October always makes us nostalgic for the good old days of the VHS era, when the local rental store was sure to have its shelves stocked with schlocky straight-to-video sequels to all our favorite horror movies and the television airwaves were replete with seasonal Halloween specials. In this DEALER'S CHOICE DOUBLE OR NOTHING DOUBLEHEADER episode, we blind-challenge each other to improvise follow-ups to a couple of our favorite spooky movies.

Here at RAISED BY RENTALS we don't put up with elitist know-it-all fans…unless they're us! In this special RENTAL RANT/SUPER GUSHERS mashup episode, we finally come clean and admit we have a problem: we’re snobs!

You screamed at the HOT GARBAGE horror of a bloodthirsty dumpster fire. Your spine went cold from the terrible truth of what was buried in the BAD RUBBISH. But now you'll learn true terror, when you find yourself alone in a dark alley with the atrocity known only as TRASH MOUTH!

1998 spawned an impressive lineup of catchy pop hits, but one song haunted the airwaves like no other with its perfect mix of rapid-fire lyrics and a radio-friendly alt-rock hook. Now, one unlucky college student will learn just how haunting it can be when she listens one too many times to the earworm that is ONE WEEK!

The kids are back! That's right, summer camp is in session and our boys Freddy and Jason are making the most of this SUMMER SLASHERAMA (Part 2)! Tune in this episode to find out what happens when these legendary spree killers get lost in time and must discover a way back to SLASHER CAMP.

It's our 100th episode! We're celebrating with a 2-part SUMMER SLASHERAMA special to indulge in our favorite improv topic: slasher movies! So join us as we imagine what happens when all the best 80s horror flick killers bring the pain to a quiet suburban town…only this town is protected by THE MONSTER SQUAD!

90s kids reveled in the ultraviolence and gore of tournament fighting games so of course cash-grab movie versions were inevitable. But what if we were in charge? We could write a screenplay that proves films based on video games don't always have to suck. But some Hollywood producer douchebag would probably just $@%&in' ruin it… For this episode, wince along with us as we improv-ruin a cinematic adaptation of MORTAL KOMBAT!

We’ve imagined film adaptations of pop songs, an Internet meme, and even board games with no storyline. But what about a book with no words? For this episode, we challenge ourselves to improv a live action movie version of WHERE’S WALDO?

Snake Plissken escaped from New York, L.A., and Earth itself…but he just can't seem to get away from corrupt men in power. Now in space, he'll go face to face with the head of the Zombie Squad, the one and only Marion Cobretti, AKA Cobra. It's a knock-down, drag-out, blockbuster crossover for the ages between these two SNAAAKES IN SPAAACE!

When there's no more room in hell, the dead will walk the earth… And we're here for it! Everyone loves a good living dead flick, but who would survive an actual undead plague? In this SUPER GUSHERS special, we gush about our favorite shamblers and imagine how we might fair if the world were overrun by ZOMBIES!

The sleepy town of Flapjack, Arkansas is in the spotlight again, this time because the mascot of a murder-themed breakfast cereal is really making a killing. Count Kreepyhead's Mike O'May joins us once more, to chronicle the return of PANCAKE FACE!

Um, actually…this isn't a regular improv episode, this is a Rental Rant special where we complain about people who insist on correcting us--whether they're right or not--and bemoan the horrors of being mildly inconvenienced. So if you can't wait to pounce on someone and belittle them for making an unimportant error, join us for a patented Random Righteous Rancorous Rental Rant b*tchfest!

The podcast which you are about to hear is an account of the tragedy which befell a group of five musicians, in particular Janice and her bandmate, Animal. It is all the more tragic that they weren’t paid for their gig. But, had they lived very, very long lives, they could not have expected nor would they have wished to see as much of the mad and macabre as they were to see that day. For them a normal drive to a gig in the armpit of nowhere became a nightmare. The events of that day were to lead to the discovery of one of the most bizarre crimes in the annals of American history, THE MUPPET CHAINSAW MASSACRE.

When the second Death Star is destroyed, the Rebels rejoice because they're finally safe from the evil of the Galactic Empire. But what about the Stormtroopers left behind on the Forest Moon of Endor? Abandoned to face the natives, the stranded Imperials are far from safe…

When the Hendersons accidentally hit a sasquatch with their car on the way back from a camping trip, they didn't expect to end up welcoming him into their home and family. But when his own family's home is threatened, a Bigfoot's gotta do what a Bigfoot's gotta do. In this episode, we improv an action-adventure sequel to the family-friendly classic, HARRY AND THE HENDERSONS!

Sometimes we're just (literally) sick and tired and need to vent, so we figured it was high time to hate on prequels, superheroes, and lazy storytelling. For this Rental Rant episode, we channel our inner angsty know-it-all teenage selves and revisit the days when we were YOUNG, DUMB, AND FULL OF OPINIONS!

Richard and Larry thought they found a shortcut to the good life when their rich and successful boss invited them out to his beach house to party, but their yuppie dreams were dashed when Bernie suddenly died…or did he? Join us on a trip to the Hamptons to see how Richard and Larry handle an encounter with the undead during their WEEKEND AT BERNIE'S.

Did Rian Johnson make one of the worst Star Wars movies or a worthy installment in the Skywalker Saga? For our most anticipated Rental Rant ever, it's finally time for us to trade fightin' words 'bout THE LAST JEDI!

First he had to escape from New York, then he had to get the hell out of L.A. For the debut episode of season 4, we'll tag along to see how Snake Plissken survives when he must ESCAPE FROM EARTH!

We celebrated our 3rd birthday this month so for the finale of Season 3 we're shining a spotlight on our most favorite topic ever: ourselves! That's right, it's time to finally tell the mysterious origin story of RAISED BY RENTALS! BONUS: You get to pick an episode topic! We cleaned out our stash of dead and abandoned episode ideas but now we want YOU to vote on which one we'll resurrect for an improv in Season 4 next year. Listen then vote on social media!

Horror was all the rage in the 80s so it's no shock that decade spawned one of the greatest TV shows of all time, a spine-chilling anthology series so popular that Hollywood stars would kill to take part. Now it's our turn to take a stab, so we asked the madman himself Professor Pickman of Pickman's Vinyls to lend us a hand for a special Xmas episode of TALES FROM THE CRYPT!

A tiny rural town tried to drum up some tourism by making a SEINFELD joke their official annual holiday celebration and everything was going great…until the mayor's infidelity kicked off a series of events that cast a curse on their festivities forever. Join us on a trip to see what happens when a group of plucky teenagers decide to bring secular holiday fun back to THE TOWN THAT DREADED FESTIVUS.

The last time Del Griffith tried to get home for Thanksgiving, he ended up on a road trip from hell but found friendship on the way. This year, the stakes are higher as Del and his new travel partner flee for their lives by hopping a ride on PLANES, TRAINS…and BATMOBILES?

It's that most holy time of year again when the night belongs to children big and small, tricks becomes treats, and the streets flow with fun size candy bars. For our spoopy season SUPER GUSHERS special, we share true crime anecdotes, cherished memories of getting the bejesus scared out of us, and all the reasons WE LOVE HALLOWEEN!

When two men move into the house next door together, Charley Brewster assumes the only logical explanation: they must be vampires! For the 2nd part of our SPOOKY SEASON SWITCHEROO we flip the script to see what happens when a normal day in suburbia becomes a FRIGHT NIGHT.

Brat Pack movies of the 80s oozed with style and swagger, defined by fashion, romance, coming of age…and falling in lust with inanimate objects?? For the 1st episode of our two-part SPOOKY SEASON SWITCHEROO we couldn't help but wonder: What was the dark secret behind the man who fell in love with a MANNEQUIN?

In 1982 Williams Electronics popularized two-player video games with an arcade hit featuring lance-wielding ostrich-riders, but when and where was this birdbrained deathmatch meant to take place? In this episode, we gaze into our misty CRT screen to scry a vision of the dystopian world that drives desperate survivors to JOUST!

Cancel culture is on the wane but when celebrities are horrible people they’re bound to be exposed. So does that mean we have to shun their art? For the final installment in our RENTAL RANT series on toxic fandom, we explore the question: When the creator of a beloved property is cancelled, can you still enjoy your TAINTED LOVE?

We made you fear a fiery dumpster hungry for blood! Now we'll reveal the terrifying origin story of that unholy HOT GARBAGE. For the 2nd part of our MIDNIGHT DRIVE-IN DOUBLE FEATURE of original horror, we find the real good $#!% in a mess of BAD RUBBISH.

The Vengabus of Death is back! But what will happen when another catchy 90s club jam shows up for the party? For the first episode of our MIDNIGHT DRIVE-IN DOUBLE FEATURE two-part sequel series, everybody wants to know: Where did you come from, COTTON EYE JOE?!

Kids in 80s and 90s movies were always left alone to take care of themselves, so of course it was a shock when Sue Ellen's mom hired a babysitter to watch the kids while she went on vacation without them. But it's OK because the babysitter died right away so the kids could have their unsupervised summer fun! For our 75th episode we investigate the suspicious events of DON'T TELL MOM THE BABYSITTER'S DEAD.

Why bother to watch a movie or play a game to see if you like it when you can just $#!% all over it before it even comes out! Our 13th RENTAL RANT episode is a warning to everyone about toxic fandom's most insidious attack: the PREEMPTIVE STRIKE!

After saving the day with arm wrestling and a truck, Lincoln Hawk won the heart of his estranged son and went into business for himself. But life on the road is hard, especially when the next adventure is OVER THE TOP!

It's 'bout time for body horror! If you can stomach it, this episode is guaranteed to make your skin crawl. For the 2nd part of our TRIGGER WARNING TWIN BILL original improv duology, we give ourselves the willies when we dare to poke more than SKIN DEEP.

There's no limit to imagination but to write a story well, it's a good idea to keep some "rules" in mind--like avoiding clichés and preventing plot holes. But since rules are made to be broken, for the first part of our TRIGGER WARNING TWIN BILL original improv series, we blithely ignore the advice that good writers should NEVER KILL THE DOG.

Being a fan of something can be hard...especially when opinionated know-it-all jerks keep telling you you're liking it wrong! For our 12th RENTAL RANT episode, we go back to the well for a sequel to our tirade on TOXIC FANDOM.