Raising Arrows

You yelled at your toddler over something stupid. Now you're sitting on the bathroom floor feeling like the worst dad alive.This episode is for you.Connor and Scott tackle the thing nobody talks about: anger in fatherhood. Not your kid's tantrums—your anger. The moment you realize your voice got louder than it should have. The guilt that follows. And the question that haunts you: am I failing them?Here's what we cover:🔍 The truth about your anger: Your kid's tantrum is not an emergency. But your anger is. The order you deal with these things matters—and most of us get it backwards.📖 James 1:19–20 as your anchor: "Be quick to listen, slow to speak, slow to anger." We unpack what this actually means at 2am when your toddler won't sleep for the 11th time.💔 The bathroom floor moment: The repair conversation. Asking for forgiveness instead of offering a quick sorry. How to teach your kids that strong men admit when they're wrong.🎯 Compassionate boundaries: It's not gentle parenting OR strict discipline. We discuss the middle ground that actually works—validating your kid's feelings while still having clear boundaries.👨‍👦 Breaking the cycle: That moment you hear your dad's voice coming out of your mouth. Why staying calm is the single most powerful parenting move you have.If you've lost your temper with your kids and questioned whether you're doing this right, this episode is a permission slip and a practical guide.Because being a good dad doesn't mean never losing it. It means always coming back.Listen and ask yourself: What's the anger really about? Then share this with a dad who needs to know he's not alone.

One in four dads experience paternal postpartum depression. One in four. So if you're in a room with three other dads, statistically one of you is walking through it right now — and probably hasn't told anyone.In this episode, Connor gets as vulnerable as he's ever been on the show. He shares what happened when his son Beau was born and the instant connection everyone promises you would feel just… wasn't there. No rush of love. No "I'd die for this kid" moment. Just distance, frustration, and a growing spiral of "something is broken in me." He opens up about sitting in his wife's postpartum screening, silently answering yes to every question she was answering no to, and the car ride home where he finally said it out loud. He talks about asking his dad for help and getting back a well-meaning but useless "you'll figure it out." And he walks through the specific Christ-centered shift — a sermon, a reframing, a decision to see every moment with his son as a gift instead of a burden — that brought him out of the darkness.Scott and Connor also talk honestly about when prayer alone isn't enough, why seeking professional help is not weakness, and why the most powerful thing a man who's been through counseling can do is tell another man he's been through counseling. Anchored in Galatians 6:2 and the call to bear one another's burdens, this episode exists for the dad who's Googling "is it normal to not feel connected to my baby" at 2 AM. You're not broken. You're not alone. And there's a way through.Scripture Referenced: Galatians 6:2 · James 1:2–4Sunset Static Background Music LicenseMusic: Sunset Static by Joshua Moses https://joshuamosesmusic.bandcamp.comLicense: Creative Commons — Attribution 4.0 International — CC BY 4.0Free Download / Stream: https://links.al/JmYMusic promoted by Audio Library: https://links.al/youtube

"Just tell me what to do." Five words every married dad has said — and five words that drive your wife crazy. In this episode, Connor and Scott get honest about the gap between wanting to help and actually owning your household. Connor shares the early-marriage kitchen moment that exposed how differently he and Shay see "clean," and Scott opens up about the night Haley snapped while scrubbing dishes — not because he wouldn't help, but because she had to ask. Together they unpack why "just tell me what to do" puts your wife in the role of project manager instead of partner, the invisible tasks she's carrying that you haven't even noticed (pediatrician appointments, shoe sizes, clothing swaps, diaper inventory), and what it actually looks like to go from "helping out" to co-owning your home. Plus: Scott's practical tip on starting with the stuff you both need — meals, groceries, meal prep — and just taking it off her plate without being asked. Anchored in Philippians 2:3–4 and the call to count others as more significant than yourself, this one will make you want to audit your own week. Fair warning: you might not love what you find.Scripture Referenced: Philippians 2:3–4 · Ephesians 5:15–16 · Ephesians 5:25Sunset Static Background Music LicenseMusic: Sunset Static by Joshua Moses https://joshuamosesmusic.bandcamp.comLicense: Creative Commons — Attribution 4.0 International — CC BY 4.0Free Download / Stream: https://links.al/JmYMusic promoted by Audio Library: https://links.al/youtube

It now costs over $300,000 to raise a child in America. Let that satisfying number sit for a second. In this episode, Connor and Pastor Scott tackle the financial pressure that keeps new dads up at night — sometimes even more than the baby does. They break down how to make that massive number feel manageable, the needs-versus-wants conversation most couples never actually have, and the real tension between working overtime to fill the savings account or clocking out to make it home for bath time. Connor gets honest about finances never being his strong suit and playing catch-up as a young father, while Scott shares what it looked like to trust God's provision when he and Shay had next to nothing as newlyweds. Anchored in Matthew 6:31-32, this episode walks the line between practical budgeting and genuine faith — because prayer without action is wishful thinking, and action without prayer is just stress with a spreadsheet.Scripture Referenced: Matthew 6:31-32 · James 2:26 · Hebrews 11:6 · Luke 12:15Background Music:Sunset Static Background Music LicenseMusic: Sunset Static by Joshua Moses https://joshuamosesmusic.bandcamp.comLicense: Creative Commons — Attribution 4.0 International — CC BY 4.0Free Download / Stream: https://links.al/JmYMusic promoted by Audio Library: https://links.al/youtube

Two-thirds of couples say their relationship satisfaction tanks after having a baby. Two-thirds. So if you and your wife feel more like co-workers running a daycare than the people who fell in love — you're not broken, you're normal. But normal doesn't mean you stay there. In this episode, Connor and Pastor Scott get honest about the roommate phase that quietly takes over your marriage when a newborn moves in. Connor shares how a sermon on date nights exposed that every conversation had become about Beau, and Scott breaks down the Gottman Institute's four horsemen — contempt, criticism, defensiveness, and stonewalling — and why scorekeeping is the gateway to all of them. They talk love languages as a practical tool (not just a buzzword), the spiritual reality that the enemy either hates your marriage or has learned to love it, and why Ephesians 5:25 isn't a suggestion — it's marching orders. If you haven't had a real conversation with your wife in weeks, this is your sign.Scripture Referenced: Ephesians 5:25

No one satisfies you before the baby arrives and says, "Hey — the guy you've been for the last 25 years? He's gone now." But that's exactly what happens. In this episode, Connor and Pastor Scott get brutally honest about the identity crisis that hits the moment your child is born. Connor opens up about the guilt spiral of wanting just five more minutes alone in a parking lot, and Scott shares how the anxiety of "everything just changed" hit him on day one. Together they unpack why grieving your old life doesn't make you ungrateful, how to reframe fatherhood as your highest calling instead of your biggest loss, and the difference between godly conviction and toxic shame. Anchored in 2 Corinthians 5:17 and Christ's call to daily die to self, this is the conversation every new dad needs but no one is having with him.Scripture Referenced: 2 Corinthians 5:17 · 2 Corinthians 7:10 · Luke 9:23 · Luke 7:23

You're spending more time with your kids than your dad ever spent with you — and somehow the guilt is worse than ever.Connor and Pastor Scott tackle the myth of the perfect dad head-on: where it comes from, why social media is lying to you, and why your kids don't need a flawless father. They just need a present one.In this episode:Why 57% of parents report burnout — and what's actually driving it (Ohio State University, 2024)The science of "Dad Brain" — how fatherhood literally rewires your brain and why your role is irreplaceableWhy consistency beats intensity every single timeWhat it looks like to be a steady, predictable anchor in your kid's chaotic little worldAnchor Verse: "My grace is sufficient for you, for my power is made perfect in weakness." — 2 Corinthians 12:9The world will tell you you're not enough. God says your weakness is exactly where He shows up.

 Why the First 3 Years Matter More Than Most Dads Realize Think your toddler won't remember these early years? Science says otherwise — and it's not even close.In this episode, Connor and Scott break down three research-backed facts about early childhood brain development that every dad needs to hear. Your toddler's brain is running at twice the speed of yours. 80% of their brain development happens before they turn three. And the neural pathways tied to motivation, self-regulation, communication, and self-esteem? They're being wired right now — or they're not.This isn't a guilt trip. It's a wake-up call. You're not waiting for your moment — you're in it.We get real about the mirror effect (when you see your worst habits show up in your kids), the myth of "I don't have time," and why small, consistent deposits beat grand gestures every time. Plus, Scott shares the daily affirmation he speaks over his son that stops tantrums in their tracks — and why identity-shaping matters more than behavior modification.Whether you're a new dad, expecting your first, or feeling like you're already behind — this one's for you.In this episode: ‣ Why your 3-year-old's brain is twice as active as yours ‣ The 1,000-day window that shapes who your child becomes ‣ How dads accidentally pass down frustration, anger, and anxiety ‣ Daily habits that build unshakable father-child bonds ‣ The phone habit that's silently teaching your kids they're not a priority ‣ Speaking identity over your children before they can speak it themselves ‣ Encouragement for the dad who feels like he's already behind📖 "Like arrows in the hand of a warrior, so are the children of one's youth." — Psalm 127:4New episodes weekly. Subscribe and share with a dad who needs to hear this.

Welcome to Raising Arrows.We're Connor and Scott — two young dads, husbands, and Christ-followers figuring out fatherhood in real time. In this first episode, we introduce ourselves, our families, and why we felt called to start this podcast.The truth? There's not a lot of real, faith-driven content out there for dads in the trenches of early fatherhood. No fluff. No "expert from a distance" energy. Just two guys walking through the toddler years, leading their families, chasing God's vision for their homes, and sharing what they're learning along the way."Like arrows in the hands of a warrior are children born in one's youth." — Psalm 127:4Whether you're expecting your first, holding your newborn, or chasing a toddler right now — this podcast is for you.New episodes dropping weekly. Hit subscribe so you don't miss what's next.