PODCAST · health
Relationship Unconscious
by James Tobin Ph.D.
The "Relationship Unconscious" podcast site focuses on how the mind’s unconscious influences the way we think, feel, and behave in our relationships. Featuring the work of licensed psychologist and psychotherapist James Tobin, Ph.D., the site offers (1) audio presentations on the psychology of relationship dynamics among couples, between parents and children, and in the workplace; (2) webinar events; and (3) recordings of interactive group seminars.
Episodes
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21 - The Four Things You Need to Know About Your Narcissistic Boss
Whether I am serving in the role of executive coach or psychotherapist, most of my clients inevitably discuss problems they are having with a narcissistic manager. Elsewhere I have described the increasing prevalence of narcissism, a trend that ironically seems to be reinforced by cultural…
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20 - The Disorder of Accumulated Stress: Anxiety
The 11 psychiatric diagnoses that make up the Anxiety Disorders category of the current psychiatric nomenclature center on the manifestation of worry, concern about future threats, ruminations about performance and social acceptance, and avoidance behaviors; paradoxically, as these concerns are...
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19 - A Self and a Name: Brief Reflection in the Wake of the College Admissions Scandal
Despite the notoriety of the 2016 publication of Angela Duckworth's Grit: The Power of Passion and Perseverance, it appears that a significant contingent of contemporary adolescents is trending toward attitudes and behaviors directly opposing the value of effort and, by extension, its apparent...
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18 - Are You Typecast? Polarization in Couples
Polarization is a common dynamic among couples that is unconsciously motivated and very hard to detect. When polarization occurs in relationships, it often yields conflict, distress, and impasse, with many couples who are polarized ultimately breaking up. But if the polarization had been…
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17 - What Nietzsche Teaches Us About Good Parenting
Friedrich Wilhelm Nietzsche was a German philosopher, artist, and Latin and Greek scholar who is perhaps best known for his study of tragedy in ancient Greek mythology. Nietzsche conceptualized an important element of tragedy, the artistic depiction of human suffering. According to Nietzsche,...
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16 - Psychological "Cloning"
As parents, most if not all of us probably hope that our own children will absorb the very best of us, our positive personality tendencies, our industrious habits, and our moral standards and values, and disregard the rest. The last thing we want to believe is that our worst characteristics -- a...
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15 - The Illusion of Complexity
Often the solutions to many problems encountered in daily living and in contemporary relationships are not that difficult to reach. In fact, it seems to me that we often know what we need to do, as the issue at hand is not typically something we do not understand but something we do, in fact,...
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14 - Counteridentification
Counteridentification is an important term in psychological theory and in the literature on psychotherapy. It is also implicated in numerous problems that many adults experience. It refers to the common unconscious motivation in pre-adolescence and adolescence for the child to seek to be…
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13 – What You Elicit
Many approaches to self-improvement and personal change are largely focused on self-understanding, on learning about one’s problematic or limiting beliefs, tendencies, and self-destructive actions. Although this perspective on the internal, personal factors that may be responsible for a person’s...
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12 – The Neurobiology of Fate
There is an emerging body of scientific research indicating that the human brain is impacted by social experience in ways we did not realize previously. In the last several decades we learned that the brain is malleable, a discovery that continues to influence how the brain responds to trauma and...
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11 - Enactment
Enactment is a term used by psychologists and theorists that refers to an experiential or relational dynamic that is created, unwittingly, by unconscious forces. Perhaps the most significant hypothesis put forth by Freud is that a person is doomed to repeat what he or she does not remember. What...
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10 - Guilt
As a psychotherapist, guilt is one of the most common emotional experiences my patients grapple with. Guilt is commonly viewed as the feeling that emerges when you've done something wrong when you've made a mistake or not acted as you would have hoped or done something that violates your own…
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09 - The World One Sees and the Seer Who Sees It
Seeing things as they are in an essential concept in Buddhist philosophy and psychology, as well as Freudian theory. So much emotional turmoil, what is known as suffering in Buddhism, is due to the tendency to withdraw from and deny the true nature of things, what Freud called the configuration…
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08 - Denial and "Mystification"
Due to our need to bond and early developmental experiences of tolerating the limitations of caregivers, denial is common in adult romantic relationships. But once denial is overcome, an important psychological capacity called "mystification" may evolve. Through the mystification process,...
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07 - The Architecture of a Relationship with a Narcissist in 5 Phases
Narcissistic tendencies are the result of psychological defenses employed early in development when the child's need for empathic reflection and mirroring was frustrated. Consequently, the adult narcissist relates to significant others in a characteristic pattern. Across five phases, the…
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06 - The Psychological Capacity of "Inflexion"
"Inflexion" is the psychological capacity necessary to subvert one's unconscious repetition of prior relational injury and trauma in current and future romantic relationships. It involves the recognition of roles and relational dynamics one consistently experiences and the desire to withdraw from...
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05 - Unconscious Relational Templates in the Film "9 1/2 Weeks"
Adrian Lyne's 1986 film "9 1/2 Weeks" depicts the disturbing sadomasochistic relationship between "John" (Mickey Rourke) and "Elizabeth" (Kim Basinger), two characters destined to form a treacherous union. Elizabeth's unconscious relational template, formed by prior relational trauma and…
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04 - Fatal Attraction: Unconscious Recruitment and Enactment
Emotional injuries suffered in relationships early in development set up the unconscious motivation to repeat and enact similar experiences of conflict, rejection, and trauma across the lifespan. Relationships are not "fated" by some spiritual force but rather by the uncanny psychological drive…
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03 - The Shared Psychological Origin of Narcissism and Codependent Relational Styles
Narcissistic and codependent relational styles in adulthood originated as unconscious psychological defenses in early development. If the child's bond with the primary caregiver was characterized by repeated unempathic and non-mirroring responses, the child may resort to compromising his or her…
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02 – The "Maternalizing Dynamic" in Romantic Relationships
Under certain conditions, a romantic relationship based on strong sexual and emotional attraction may devolve into unconscious role assignments in which a woman acts in a maternalistic fashion toward her previously competent and autonomous partner. Each partner contributes to this insidious...
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01 - The Distinction between "Attachment" and "Erotic" Love
Many people experience unnecessary struggles in their romantic relationships because they unconsciously rely on primitive bonding strategies ("attachment") rather than on "erotic" forms of relatedness characterized by an uncensored expression of self, firm boundaries, and divestment from compliance.
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ABOUT THIS SHOW
The "Relationship Unconscious" podcast site focuses on how the mind’s unconscious influences the way we think, feel, and behave in our relationships. Featuring the work of licensed psychologist and psychotherapist James Tobin, Ph.D., the site offers (1) audio presentations on the psychology of relationship dynamics among couples, between parents and children, and in the workplace; (2) webinar events; and (3) recordings of interactive group seminars.
HOSTED BY
James Tobin Ph.D.
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Frequently Asked Questions
How many episodes does Relationship Unconscious have?
Relationship Unconscious currently has 21 episodes available on PodParley. New episodes are automatically indexed when they're published to the podcast feed.
What is Relationship Unconscious about?
The "Relationship Unconscious" podcast site focuses on how the mind’s unconscious influences the way we think, feel, and behave in our relationships. Featuring the work of licensed psychologist and psychotherapist James Tobin, Ph.D., the site offers (1) audio presentations on the psychology of...
How often does Relationship Unconscious release new episodes?
Relationship Unconscious has 21 episodes. Check the episode list to see recent publication dates and frequency.
Where can I listen to Relationship Unconscious?
You can listen to Relationship Unconscious on PodParley by clicking any episode. We provide an embedded audio player for direct listening, and you can also subscribe via your preferred podcast app using the RSS feed.
Who hosts Relationship Unconscious?
Relationship Unconscious is created and hosted by James Tobin Ph.D..
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