PODCAST · fiction
Rude Tales of Magic
by Bucket of Milk
In this improvised narrative role playing podcast, come and join artists, writers, and comedians from Adult Swim, Cartoon Network, Comedy Central, Marvel Comics, and more as they fight and fumble their way across the madcap, and exceedingly rude, fantasy wasteland of Cordelia. Branson Reese and his jester's retinue, Christopher Hastings, Carly Monardo, Tim Platt, Joe Lepore, and Ali Fisher star as a group of unlikely survivors (a talking crow, a lich in a wig, a bubbly fawn, a Sasquatch punk, and a tiefling hunk, specifically) who must solve the mystery of Polaris University's vanishment and return balance and higher education to their world. It's going to be very hard and very, very, rude.
Episodes
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Mall Quiet on the Western Front
Our heroes head into the Infinity Mall, a place full of endless possibilities...and endless possibilities (bad version). Follow us on bluesky for goodness sake, it's fun! And it's probably the best way to contact us, all things considered. Special Thanks as always to Sydney and Benjamin Paul and...
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[Unlocked] Opera & Sherry #1!
It's the 5th Tuesday of the month, so you know what that means...releasing bonus content out from behind the paywall!!! *Airhorn* *Airhorn* Tell your friends, Rude Tales done did Frasier. For this PATREON GAME OF THE MONTH, Branson invites Ali, Joe, and Tim to the ancient land of Seattle where...
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[Patreon Preview] Opera & Sherry #2
Just when you thought it was safe to go back in the Seattle... Wanna hear the rest of this incredible episode? Well it's a Patreon Exclusive, so you're gonna want to head there and subscribe now! We'll be releasing one-shots like this each and every month, so subscribe today to hear 'em all and...
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This Is Bus
With the strange of events of the Long Weekend behind them, our heroes can finally get back to what's really important: their studies! How is Scooter's Honors History project going, anyways? Wait? What do you mean? It's not going to be a just a regular, uneventful day at school? It's going to be...
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Intro to Botany
While Mikey, Briley, and Scooter would love to get back to the Carton Family Brunch, they instead are confronted by mild-mannered Diner employee Giles Waiterman, who has some surprising revelations to share. You mean to tell me this Oxford-educated British man who waits tables in a diner outside...
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[Patreon Preview] Lassos & Cowpokes!
The Good, The Bad, and the Ugly? More like the Rude, the Tales, of the Magic! Saddle up, pardners, for the rootinest, tootinest, podcastinest bonus content this side of the Rio Grand! Wanna hear the rest of this incredible episode? Well it's a Patreon Exclusive, so you're gonna want to head there...
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In the Gust of Snakes
How many snakes must a teen absorb Before you call her a Beast? How many snakes must her friends fight off? Before she tries to eat them? The answer, my friend, is gustin' in the snakes The answer is gustin' in the snakes Follow us on bluesky for goodness sake, it's fun! And it's probably the…
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Long Weekend
Our heroes have finally accepted their roles as, well, heroes! Hope just as this happens, shocking revelations about their powers don't threaten to tear them apart!! I'm a guy who hates compelling narratives! Follow us on bluesky for goodness sake, it's fun! And it's probably the best way to...
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[Patreon Preview] Scyllas & Charybdises!
The Podcasting Gods have come down from Mount Podlympus and taken the shape of swans to bestow upon you this bonus game. Enjoy, mortals! What wisdom, your Gods must have, to record a podcast so timely! Wanna hear the rest of this incredible episode? Well it's a Patreon Exclusive, so you're gonna...
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Heroes Don't Suck
The Chess Club would hate it if you listened to this episode. Unless...that's one of their deft gambits, tricking you into listening to the episode?? Follow us on bluesky for goodness sake, it's fun! And it's probably the best way to contact us, all things considered. Special Thanks as always to...
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What Will Happen At The Sophomore Assembly?
The Sophomore Assembly has long been shrouded in mystery? What exactly happens when the doors of the auditorium close? No one will say. But our heroes are about to find out. And so will you, if you just hit 'play' on your podcast app of your choosing! Go ahead, do it! Follow us on bluesky for...
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[Patreon Preview] Rodents and Chivalry #2! DM'ed by Branson!
As a June with 5 Tuesdays, we simply had no choice but to share with our beloved listeners (you) a second Patreon Game of the Month! Your cup overfloweth! And this time? It's filled with Elderberry Cordial! Following our legendary, original Rodents & Chivalry game, Branson boldly takes the DM…
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Gulp
Some things are hard to swallow. Follow us on bluesky for goodness sake, it's fun! And it's probably the best way to contact us, all things considered. Special Thanks as always to Sydney and Benjamin Paul and Tyler Button, and our Big Freak Spacejamfan! This episode features additional sound…
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Soup Du Jour
Hey, the kids've gotta eat somehow! Follow us on bluesky for goodness sake, it's fun! And it's probably the best way to contact us, all things considered. Special Thanks as always to Sydney and Benjamin Paul and Tyler Button, and our Big Freak Spacejamfan! This episode features additional sound...
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[Patreon Preview] Oozes and Ninjas!
RUDE TALES BONE CON OOZES & NINJAS RUDE TALES BONE CON OOZES & NINJAS RUDE TALES BONE CON OOZES & NINJAS SUBSCRIBE FOR THE FULL EP- THIS A PREVIEW! Wanna hear the rest of this incredible episode? Well it's a Patreon Exclusive, so you're gonna want to head there and subscribe now! We'll be…
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Auditions
Our heroes don't use their powers much this episode, but boy oh boy do people smoke in high school! If you like "smoking cigarettes in and around high school, during the day, alongside teachers" this is YOUR episode. Enjoy! Follow us on bluesky for goodness sake, it's fun! And it's probably the...
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Ooh La La in the House! Ooh La La!
Our heroes meet a strange child in a basement. Good news: he's facing them-not a Blair Witch situation. Phew. Bad News? He's still a creepy little freak! Afterwards, the gang gets hungry, but what's still open this late? Follow us on bluesky for goodness sake, it's fun! And it's probably the best...
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[Patreon Preview] Opera & Sherry, DM'ed by Branson!
Well baby I hear the podcast a callin?! Here's a preview of our latest Patreon Game of the Month, Opera & Sherry, GM'ed by Branson and starring Ali, Joe, and Tim! Wanna hear the rest of this incredible episode? Well it's a Patreon Exclusive, so you're gonna want to head there and subscribe now!...
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Something Amazing
Over the course of 4 episodes, our heroes have experienced so much. Love and loss, heartbreak and joy. And if you think about it, they've almost completed one whole calendar day of the school year. How could so much happen in such a short time? That's youth I guess. But what if, at this late…
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Text Education
Reeling from the events of the previous two episodes (meeting an alien, mysterious powers, homeroom icebreakers, etc.), the gang finishes their first day of school and heads to the McChristmas basement to debrief. Hopefully more trouble won't find them there... Follow us on bluesky for goodness...
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[Patreon Preivew] Tommyguns and Fuggedaboutits! GM'ed by Branson!
Here's a preview of our first Patreon Game of the Month, Tommyguns and Fuggedaboutits, GM'ed by Branson and starring Ali, Joe, and Tim! Wanna hear the rest of this incredible episode? Well it's a Patreon Exclusive, so you're gonna want to head there and subscribe now! We'll be releasing one-shots...
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Life is a Hallway
The School Bell Rings. Homeroom. Paths Diverge. Halls are monitored. Follow us on bluesky for goodness sake, it's fun! And it's probably the best way to contact us, all things considered. Special Thanks as always to Sydney and Benjamin Paul and Tyler Button, and our Big Freak Spacejamfan! This...
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[New Campaign Premiere] An Odd Event
Ah, Sophomore year. For many American High Schoolers, it truly is one of the most Second High School Years. It certainly is for Mikey McChristmas (Branson Reese), Briley Brynn Bailey (Ali Fisher), and Scooter Carton (Joe Lepore) At Foxmenville, Ohio's own Blue Kindness High. But what if a school...
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BLUE KINDNESS HIGH: COMING TUESDAY MARCH 17
Summer's over, losers! Get in! Coming this Tuesday, March 17th, is the premiere of our next thrilling Rude Tale: BLUE KINDNESS HIGH. Action! Adventure! Suburbs! Mystery! Drama! Extracurriculars! All this and more comes to your precious ears in a few short days, as we begin the saga that is...
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BLUE KINDNESS HIGH SESSION ZERO w/Tim, Ali, Branson, and Joe!
Blue Kindness High is almost here! Ali, Branson, and Joe sit down with our Game Master Tim Platt to reveal their characters, their secrets, and—buckle up!—their favorite high school classes!! Follow us on bluesky for goodness sake, it's fun! And it's probably the best way to contact us, all…
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UNLOCKED! Rude Talks of Chatting for Nethermurk 36 & Campaign Wrap-Up
Out from behind the walls of Patreon, it's Rude Talks of Chatting for Nethermurk 36, the whole campaign, and what's next... NETHERMURK HAS ENDED WITH IT'S INCREDIBLE FINALE "SUNDOWNING"! Listen to the WHOLE CAST answer questions, razz each other, announce futures, and sing! Catch more bonus chats...
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BONUS Game: Sense & Feelings!
Wanna watch this episode? Check it out on the Rude Tales Youtube! REGENCY ENGLAND: When the three youngest Godzilla sisters attend a Garden Party given by their elder sister, will they be able to find the eligible suitors of their dreams? Or will their hopes for advantageous marriages gulp go up…
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Sundowning
Will all the light be eaten? Will our heroes survive? Will anything slime-related happen? All this and more, in the thrilling finale of RUDE TALES OF MAGIC: NETHERMURK Follow us on bluesky for goodness sake, it's fun! And it's probably the best way to contact us, all things considered. Special...
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A Visit to Baltimore!
The gang takes a helicopter ride! Follow us on bluesky for goodness sake, it's fun! And it's probably the best way to contact us, all things considered. Special Thanks as always to Sydney and Benjamin Paul and Tyler Button, and our Big Freak Spacejamfan! This episode features additional sound...
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Night Trial Live!
The party reaches the surface. Follow us on bluesky for goodness sake, it's fun! And it's probably the best way to contact us, all things considered. Special Thanks as always to Sydney and Benjamin Paul and Tyler Button, and our Big Freak Spacejamfan! This episode features additional sound design...
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HUMANS
Note: This Program Does Not Endorse the Lifestyle of the NPCs of this Episode MERCH ALERT! For the Holidays, we've re-released a bunch of classic designs out from the vault along with some new designs too! Check it all out in our store! Follow us on bluesky for goodness sake, it's fun! And it's...
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Yuletide Kombat Family V: DARK SLEIGH
Every year, as the days grow short and a chill flies upon the wind (unless you're in the Southern Hemisphere!! Sorry y'all), the most dangerous Holiday Characters enter the arena in search of Yuletide glory. BUT THIS YEAR... That Arena? A dang Race Course like Mario Kart! Those Characters? Dark,...
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Hot Hot Hot!
The denizens of the Nethermurk race to the surface. Ulysses and Studio make important discoveries. The Mosquitos awaken. We visit a museum! MERCH ALERT! For the Holidays, we've re-released a bunch of classic designs out from the vault along with some new designs too! Check it all out in our…
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Coming Right Web!
Endrizzi learns something very important about himself, and we visit the surface. Follow us on bluesky for goodness sake, it's fun! And it's probably the best way to contact us, all things considered. Special Thanks as always to Sydney and Benjamin Paul and Tyler Button, and our Big Freak...
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Bell Ringers
In this episode, Christopher Hastings plays a talking skeleton! The BIG Oh These, Those Stars of Space! 100th Episode spectacular is out! Head over to the These Those Patreon and subscribe today so you can hear it! Follow us on bluesky for goodness sake, it's fun! And it's probably the best way…
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Regnum Caelorum
Our Heroes enter the "Kingdom of Heaven", and find some of what they're looking for, and a stadium-sized amount of what they didn't. The BIG Oh These, Those Stars of Space! 100th Episode spectacular is out! Head over to the These Those Patreon and subscribe today so you can hear it! Follow us on...
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Oh These, Those Stars of Space! Episode 100: "Mirror, Mirror on the Star..." Preview!
Did you know- we make another podcast?? And we've made 100 episodes of it?? It's true! For your beautiful rude ears, here's a preview of the 100th Oh These Those Stars of Space Spectacular, "Mirror, Mirror, on the Star..." What lies on the other side of the mirror? What if it was not a perfect...
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HamsterX Dot Com
If you think something is wrong about the title of this episode, maybe think about what that says about you!!! The BIG Oh These, Those Stars of Space! 100th Episode spectacular is next week- head over to the These Those Patreon and subscribe today so you can hear it the moment it drops! Follow us...
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Christmas Comes But Once a Summer! (Nice Tales of Friendship Fall Spectacular!)
Oh gosh! Is it true? Christmas in Summer?? What is this- Australia? Not at all, though Australia is a wonderful country where they call Burger King Hungry Jack's! For in the world of NICE TALES OF FRIENDSHIP, there's always two summers! And this time, Ryan Cinnamon (Ali Fisher) and Lovely Heaven...
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All Rats, All Rats, All Rats...
Deep in the belly of the beast, Uly, Paris, and Lemon, concoct an elaborate ruse to deceive the elves in their midst. Meanwhile, Linus finds much more straightforward ways of solving problems. Follow us on bluesky for goodness sake, it's fun! And it's probably the best way to contact us, all…
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Going No Contact
Our heroes head deep into God's Descent, where they'll find: Unexpected Allies Unexpected Enemies A Ton of Elves Uhh yeah, let me be the first to say: UH OH!!! Follow us on bluesky for goodness sake, it's fun! And it's probably the best way to contact us, all things considered. Special Thanks as...
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Get Slimed!!!
You'll never guess what we multiply by the population of Tokyo in this one. ALSO: The party finally faces off with the Light Eater. Follow us on bluesky for goodness sake, it's fun! And it's probably the best way to contact us, all things considered. Special Thanks as always to Sydney and…
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Short Times at Pixie High
We turn back the page, and with the combined power of storytelling and Hollywood de-aging CGI, we tell a formative tale from Lemon's youth? Will it somehow inform their modern race through the hospital to escape the Light Eater? Wouldn't that be something... Follow us on bluesky for goodness…
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The Bounty Becomes the Hunted (With Special Guests the Fool's Gold Crew!)
Just as our heroes reunite with Lemon, they find themselves targeted by three deadly Bounty Hunters (Dingo, Felix Irnich, and Avery Howett) with a certain piece of special jewelry in their sights! Hope it's not that ring Paris is especially fond of... For more from the Fools Gold crew, including...
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Emergency Room Family Reunion
Our party finally arrives at the strange and twisted hospital of Cruncho. Surely madness won't await them inside? Ok, ok, IF madness awaits inside, surely a reunion with a friend and *gulp* family member won't also await them inside?? AND RIDDLES??? HAVE YOU PUT EVERYTHING IN THIS EPISODE, SIR?...
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Conclave (2025)
A death. Smoke. A return. An Election. Follow us on twitter for goodness sake, it's fun! And it's probably the best way to contact us, all things considered. Special Thanks as always to Sydney and Benjamin Paul and Tyler Button, and our Big Freak Spacejamfan! This episode features additional…
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Silence is Golden
Shh! Follow us on twitter for goodness sake, it's fun! And it's probably the best way to contact us, all things considered. Special Thanks as always to Sydney and Benjamin Paul and Tyler Button, and our Big Freak Spacejamfan! This episode features additional sound design by Michaël Ghelfi.…
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A Chocolate, if You Can Keep It
Nothing wrong with being an impressionable young lad, I say! Unless, of course, you run into some... bad influences. Follow us on twitter for goodness sake, it's fun! And it's probably the best way to contact us, all things considered. Special Thanks as always to Sydney and Benjamin Paul and…
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"Oh, Brother!"
WARNING: This Episode Contains Spoilers for the 2013 Novel The Goldfinch, by Donna Tartt. Follow us on twitter for goodness sake, it's fun! And it's probably the best way to contact us, all things considered. Special Thanks as always to Sydney and Benjamin Paul and Tyler Button, and our Big Freak...
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Boat Funeral!
Our heroes say goodbye to some fallen friends, but in the twisted world of Nethermurk? They've never even heard of a bereavement policy, friend. That's right, the gang finds themselves in Diatopolis- the beating, evil heart of the enemy. But could it also be...more? Follow us on twitter for...
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ABOUT THIS SHOW
In this improvised narrative role playing podcast, come and join artists, writers, and comedians from Adult Swim, Cartoon Network, Comedy Central, Marvel Comics, and more as they fight and fumble their way across the madcap, and exceedingly rude, fantasy wasteland of Cordelia. Branson Reese and his jester's retinue, Christopher Hastings, Carly Monardo, Tim Platt, Joe Lepore, and Ali Fisher star as a group of unlikely survivors (a talking crow, a lich in a wig, a bubbly fawn, a Sasquatch punk, and a tiefling hunk, specifically) who must solve the mystery of Polaris University's vanishment and return balance and higher education to their world. It's going to be very hard and very, very, rude.
HOSTED BY
Bucket of Milk
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Frequently Asked Questions
How many episodes does Rude Tales of Magic have?
Rude Tales of Magic currently has 199 episodes available on PodParley. New episodes are automatically indexed when they're published to the podcast feed.
What is Rude Tales of Magic about?
In this improvised narrative role playing podcast, come and join artists, writers, and comedians from Adult Swim, Cartoon Network, Comedy Central, Marvel Comics, and more as they fight and fumble their way across the madcap, and exceedingly rude, fantasy wasteland of Cordelia. Branson Reese and his...
How often does Rude Tales of Magic release new episodes?
Rude Tales of Magic publishes regularly with 199 episodes available. Check the episode list for the typical release schedule.
Where can I listen to Rude Tales of Magic?
You can listen to Rude Tales of Magic on PodParley by clicking any episode. We provide an embedded audio player for direct listening, and you can also subscribe via your preferred podcast app using the RSS feed.
Who hosts Rude Tales of Magic?
Rude Tales of Magic is created and hosted by Bucket of Milk.
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