Same Day Shipping: Real Love & Fake Relationships

What do you do when you are outed as a cheater? Uh huh, uh huh, and what if you're outed as a cheater during the wake of the person you cheated with's spouse? You get those tasty little hand sammiches, and you get the S out. Then, there's a Jungle Cruise movie, which means the Shippers return to a long-forgotten topic: Cruise Ships! Overboard! Jaws! Futurama! Ghost Ship! Peter Pan! Hosted on Acast. See acast.com/privacy for more information.

Everyone likes a sexy surprise, right? Even when that surprise ma-a-a-ay electrocute you? Then, there's some kind of GI Joe movie out, so we're doing Snake Ships. We got all the snakes - Pliskin, Solid, Jafar the... all of 'em! Hosted on Acast. See acast.com/privacy for more information.

Okay, totally normal: your SO is an alien sent to kill everyone. Are you chill about it? Or are you gonna join team ET? Then, it's time for the return of Space Jam, which means your shippers have some Space Jam Ships to share. Hosted on Acast. See acast.com/privacy for more information.

What do you do when Colin is your friend (or your SO) and you really really like him, but, like, my God, it's impossible to get anywhere in Taboo. Have you ever tried? It's the slow burn's slow burn. What are we talking about? Doesn't matter. Then, Black Widow is out after being delayed like 900 times. So the topic is Ships That We Were Denied For A Very Long Time, But Are Finally Getting. Or something like that. Hosted on Acast. See acast.com/privacy for more information.

Who's allowed to be mad when you and your SO both mutually blow each other off at the club? Ah, what the hell, let's all be mad. Then, the Tomorrow War is out, so it's time to... travel to the future to fight aliens? Or, maybe we're just ships some Tomorrow Ships! Hosted on Acast. See acast.com/privacy for more information.

What do you do when your girlfriend disappears but then there's like a new girl who's basically making herself out to be your old girlfriend? You just date that new girl, right? Or shit, is she going to steal your identity too? Then, Mario Golf: Super Rush is out today, which means the shippers are talking Golf Ships. Caddyshack! Two different ships from the Simpsons?!!??! Whaaaaa? Hosted on Acast. See acast.com/privacy for more information.

What do you do when your date starts coughing moths? And the moths are killing each other? And maybe there's a witch involved? Then, Luca is out on Disney +, so that means it's time for Sea Monster Ships! They're wet, they're slimy, and they got big ol' mouths! Godzilla! The Meg! Pirates of the Caribbean! Harry Potter! The Little Mermaid! Sleeping Beauty! The Shape of Water! Hosted on Acast. See acast.com/privacy for more information.

If we're never going to see DC and Marvel crossover in the comics, the least we can do is cross them over in our ships! It's a celebration of randomly-generated ships from publishers that never play nice. Hosted on Acast. See acast.com/privacy for more information.

Look, even if your SO is a total screw-up, if he's got a movie pitch as solid as "Godfather meets the Mob" you really just gotta bankroll that badboy. Then, Cruella is about a woman who will try to murder puppies someday, with a fun (?) punk / girlboss / high fashion twist. Which means it's time to talk Punk Ships. Teenage Mutant Ninja Turtles! Scott Pilgrim vs. The World! Fuck-Off Squad! Steven Universe! Degrassi! Toy Story! Cinderella III: A Twist In Time! Hosted on Acast. See acast.com/privacy for more information.

Sometimes you start nasty-flirting with a brand. WHAT. COMES. NEXT. Then Army of the Dead is out so we're talking Zombie Ships! Again? Again. Mass Effect! Resident Evil! Dogma! My Boyfriend's Back! mc chris! Hosted on Acast. See acast.com/privacy for more information.

What do you do when you could probably just punch your way to love? You punch! Or drop a boulder on him? What's that? "Regicide" you say? Then, Resident Evil VIII has a big tall hot mommy in it, so the Shippers do what they do best: be horny about it. Mister Miracle! Sneakers! Valley Girl! Ratatouille! Hosted on Acast. See acast.com/privacy for more information.

What do you do when you're a spy, but it turns out the guy you're spying on is tricking you? Wait, hold on. You're both liars and... wait... wait... hold on. Then, Returnal is out for Playstation, and just like all video games right now, it's got a built-in narrative reason you just keep dying and living the same stretch of time over and over again. That means it's time to discuss our favorite Loop Ships! That means it's time to discuss our favorite Loop Ships! That means it's time to discuss our favorite Loop Ships! Looper! Hades! Fear! Palm Springs! Hosted on Acast. See acast.com/privacy for more information.

The ritual concludes in the only way it could: with an argument about what a reach-around actually is. The world is spared for another few years. But the threat will re-emerge someday. And Same Day Shipping will be there to defend the Earth. Together. Hosted on Acast. See acast.com/privacy for more information.

The ritual continues as Ryan, Kelly, and Patrick try to determine what the middle 80-minutes of Zack Snyder's Justice League actually entails. Everything is so slow and so weightless that every scene feels like a Martian Manhunter trick. (For real, the only meaningful scene where Martha expresses some genuine pathos, and it's not even her? WHAT CRUELTY IS THIS?) Can Zack Snyder dampen Ryan's OTP? Can Flash find love in Toon Town? Is Cyborg a mechanomancer? Hosted on Acast. See acast.com/privacy for more information.

At San Diego Comic Con 2018, Ryan, Kelly, and Patrick watched Suicide Squad on three consecutive nights. Thus, an arcane ritual was born: this trio of Shippers would be doomed to recreate this experience every couple years appease the Gods of Apokalips and New Genesis. This year's torment is Zack Snyder's Justice League, which your hosts must discuss for three straight weeks. Will there be ships? Will there be bodies vaporized my Amazonian bracers? Or will it all be slow-mo needle drops and mysterious choirs of Aquaman worshipers? Hosted on Acast. See acast.com/privacy for more information.

What do you do when you are witness to the worst-imaginable "meet the parents" scenario? You look around to see if you're being filmed for a prank show because it's April Fools Day, and up to 25% of your Shipple Dips are actually into that kind of thing. Which means it's time to discuss our favorite Prank Ships! Fear Factor! Community! Looney Tunes! Sonic the Hedgehog! April Fools! Hosted on Acast. See acast.com/privacy for more information.

What do you do when you realize the priest at your church isn't being faithful to you? I mean, he's already cheating on God, what did you expect, girl? Then: it's Godzilla vs. Kong Day at Same Day Shipping, which means we're talking about monkeys and monsters everything in between. King Kong! 50 First Dates! Misery! Attack on Titan! Kiki's Delivery Service! Donkey Kong! Iron Man! Hosted on Acast. See acast.com/privacy for more information.

What do you do when you're confronted with a wild-eyed man with an insatiable appetite for adventure and the Declaration of Indepence in his hands? You lock that shit down, baaaaaabbbbbbyyyy! Then, against all odds, the Snyder Cut of Justice League is real, and it's here! The Shippers get into the spirit by slowing it way down for their favorite (and least favorite) Slo-Mo Ships. Dredd! Enter the Void! North & South! Hosted on Acast. See acast.com/privacy for more information.

Oh boy. As far as hypotheticals go... I'm not even sure how to describe this one... What do you do when your SO has a Real Person Fic incest kink, but expresses it in a (mostly) non-sexual way? Naturally: you ask more questions. Way more questions. Then, Mogge and Kelly have been watching British panel show Taskmaster, so what the hell? It's time to talk Taskmaster ships! Hosted on Acast. See acast.com/privacy for more information.

Okay, but when you really think about it, would it really be so different to be dating the kid from Big? That's how all people are, right? Then, it's the end of the goddamn year, so it's time to discuss the Ships that sailed in 2020. It means we're talking about The Circle again (check your calendar, that was THIS YEAR), and finally going full spoilers ("Spoil me rotten." -Ryan Mogge) on The Last of Us Part II. Happy New Year and may your ships never be more problematic than you're prepared to handle! Hosted on Acast. See acast.com/privacy for more information.

You've heard of "shoot the hostage", but what do you do if your partner institutes a "kiss the hostage policy?" Worse yet, what happens if they kiss you and it's like the best damn thing you ever experienced? YOU CAN CHANGE THEM RIGHT?!?! Then, it's Christmas Day, which means Wonder Woman 1984 is on your TV, and the Shippers are talking 80s ships! Die Hard! Valley Girl! Return to Oz! Commercials! Radical! Hosted on Acast. See acast.com/privacy for more information.

What do you do when your SO is like "babe, I'm going to make you this great meal I learned about in nutrition class" and then proceeds to rinse partially cooked beef IN THE SINK? You check out that nutrition class for some kind of body-snatch-situation, right? Then, there's a bunch of new Jeopardy collections up on Netflix, and Alex Trebek's final episodes are airing, so it's time to talk Quiz Ships. From songs to Degrassi to Jack Box Party Packs, there are too many trivia-obsessed weirdos to ship! Hosted on Acast. See acast.com/privacy for more information.

What do you do when the person you want to be with makes fun of your Christmas sweater? Oh, and also you have a Clayface face? Do we understand what's going on here? Nah. Then, Mank is out there, so let's talk about our favorite ships from David Fincher movies (and music videos). This one gets dark. Hosted on Acast. See acast.com/privacy for more information.

What do you do when your boss wants you to basically cancel Christmas? And then also a tall hot boy is there, and he wants you to not cancel Christmas? Before you respond: this hot tall boy is like 7 feet tall and carved out of marble. Then, it's time to talk NPC ships, which means Zelda, which means Star Fox, which means Mario, but most urgently (and most hornily) it means HADES. Hook Zag up with everyone. Hook Meg up with everyone. Hook Than up with everyone. Hosted on Acast. See acast.com/privacy for more information.

What do you do when your boss' BF sends you lingerie at the office, and that same boss catches you opening it? Sounds like you hold all the cards, but maybe you don't! Then, the shippers' artificial extension of October concludes with "OctPhoBer." So this one's about soup? A'ight, let's do this. Hosted on Acast. See acast.com/privacy for more information.

What do you do when you're obviously crazy, but the papers insist on referring to you as "mild mannered"? Do you ride it out or try to right the injustice? I mean, if that's an AP headline, you probably can't do shit. Then, because the shippers can't let October go, they artificially stretch it out to yet another week - this time calling it OctFoalBer. Y'know, like a horse. And everyone definitely knows what the theme is and no one accidentally did an OctFoilBer ship. Hosted on Acast. See acast.com/privacy for more information.

What do you do when you can't convince anyone to watch your favorite sexy TV show? Also what if you're the only person who finds it sexy? Also also what if you're Colin J. Morris and this isn't so much a hypothetical question as just your goddamn reality and you really really really want your girlfriend to watch Taboo with you??? Then, fake October and forced word play continues with OctFoeBer Ships! The Shippers are always fans of enemies-to-lovers, this is just a formalized reason to explore some of their faves. Hosted on Acast. See acast.com/privacy for more information.

What do you do when you find yourself in a genuine Degraci situation? Is there enough communication in the world to get you through one of those things? Then, the calendar may say "November", but the Shippers ain't done with October. That's right, it's the first Friday in OctFauxber, so we talkin' fakes and phonies. Hosted on Acast. See acast.com/privacy for more information.

What do you do when you're too sick to pull off the heist with your SO? And who is to blame when you start barfing all over the cash you boosted from the mafia stronghold? (Subquestion: is there anything more embarrassing or unpleasant than pooing your pants?) Then, hey, it's Halloween, which means it's time for Tales from the Ship. Does everyone understand the black cat-egory? Or do they all just have to boo their beast to scare up with some killer ships with very little desecration? It's a cobwebcast episcream to dismember with your fiends Skelly Boo-gent, Coffin J. Morbid, Dyin' Mo-ghoul and Patrick-or-TRICK Hell-ers. Hosted on Acast. See acast.com/privacy for more information.

What do you do when a bumbling detective tries to get you to fake your death to trick your SO? Depends on how charming that detective is, right? Then it's time to discuss Leftover Ships. Friends who are left over, topics that are left over, and leftover enthusiasts! (But, weirdly, no mention of HBOs "The Leftovers.") Hosted on Acast. See acast.com/privacy for more information.

What do you do when your SO's aversion to pornography is due to the fact that their parents are porn stars? Then, DC has released a Batman - Death in the Family animated movie, which means the Shippers are discussing ships that would be perfect if only one meddling character would be taken out (i.e., murdered) first. It's Take 'Em Out Ships! Hosted on Acast. See acast.com/privacy for more information.

What do you do when there's drama around not inviting the one terrible person in your friend group to your wedding? Relatedly, Kelly and Ryan have been watching Selling Sunset. Then: the Shipple Dips fight the War on Grandpa - it's time for Grandpa Ships. Hosted on Acast. See acast.com/privacy for more information.

What if your life changed for the better, but your SO wanted it to change back? (There's a twist here...) Then, Star Wars Squadrons is out, so we're talking Pilot Ships. Does that mean ships from pilot episodes? Characters that pilot things falling in love? Oh: it's at least these two things and maybe some more. Hosted on Acast. See acast.com/privacy for more information.

What do you do when you discover your DoorDash driver is one of the most despicable pedalers of faux-intellectual alt-right propaganda trash in the country? The Shippers work out some ambient rage on this topic before turning to the return of FX's Fargo. This can only mean one thing: Dontcha Know Ships! Minnesotans! North Dakotans! Ohioans? Sure they count! Hosted on Acast. See acast.com/privacy for more information.

In the post-post-post-apocalyptic future, a young woman is exiled from the small religious enclave of Haven for a crime she did not commit. Lurking in the surreal horror of the wilds are beasts and fiends, but these monsters illuminate her past, her relationships, and the circumstances surrounding her exile. This is her audio diary. Available wherever you get your podcasts and comes out Thursdays.Subscribe to EXILE: https://shows.acast.com/exileNOTE: This podcast is best enjoyed using headphones or earbuds.Written, performed, mixed, and produced by Kelly Nugent. Music composed by Analise Nelson.Support the show directly: ko-fi.com/exile Hosted on Acast. See acast.com/privacy for more information.

Colin tries to convince his friends that it's not so weird to keep the remains of 30 pets in your one-room apartment. The boxes he's keeping those remains in, evidently, are very nice. Then, it's time to discuss Girls on a Mission ships. It's two two girls, trying to get shit done, maybe sharing a few smooches along the way! Hosted on Acast. See acast.com/privacy for more information.

Do you assume that your SO is in some kind of body swap scenario? Or cheating on you? You'd be surprised which one the Shippers all assume. Then, there's a new Avengers game out there, and some of the character models are a little wonky, so it's time to talk Avengers ANTI-SHIPS. Who in the Marvel universe is too repugnant to ship with anything? Hosted on Acast. See acast.com/privacy for more information.

What do you do when you find out your SO has been scamming the company they work for out of hundreds of thousands of dollars? You GET IN ON IT. Right? Bilk away, I say. Then, there's a new Bill & Ted movie, so it's time the Shippledips talk Face the Music ships! Best Little Whorehouse in Texas! Ten Years! Airheads! Hosted on Acast. See acast.com/privacy for more information.

DC's Fandome is this weekend, which feels like a perfect opportunity for one of Kelly's patented blackout rage-tirades about the Snyder Cut. Oh, wait, no: I mean it's the perfect opportunity to randomly match up the best of the best of the DC Universe with a list of SDS All-Stars! Can the shippers get out of this one without ogling Dick Grayson's ass? No! Of course they can't! Why would they even try!? Hosted on Acast. See acast.com/privacy for more information.

Look, first of all, don't have your wedding in Coronavirus time. You think you want that, but MY GOD, it can wait. But then also, p l e a s e don't sing a custom medley of parody Disney songs during your maid of honor speech. I mean, gross, right? Then, Teenage Bounty Hunters is out on Netflix, so it's time to explore Crime and School and Ships! Hosted on Acast. See acast.com/privacy for more information.

What do you do when a VERY SITCOM-Y premise plays out, and your S.O. steals your perfectly crafted joke? Probably just watch that episode of Happy Endings and do what they did? Then, there's a new Fast & Furious video game called "Fast & Furious: Crossroads" which means it's time to discuss Crossroads Ships. Hosted on Acast. See acast.com/privacy for more information.

Mogge's got some beef with the list of America's Best Sleuths as it appears on the Murder She Wrote DVD box set special features (seriously, why is Sherlock Holmes on this list), so the Shipple Dips hash it out. Then, there's a new movie about the ACLU's non-stop fights against the Trump administration coming out today, and that movie is called "The Fight." That's justification enough to talk about the Fist and Ships of our favorite fightin' ships, right? RIGHT. Hosted on Acast. See acast.com/privacy for more information.

You've had a whole conversation with someone without noticing the person sitting next to them. Is that person just boring? Or some kind of ghost? Maybe you're the ghost? Then, believe it or not, baseball is starting up (THAT SEEMS SAFE), so the Shipple Dips are taking it to the diamond and sliding into home ship. Hosted on Acast. See acast.com/privacy for more information.

Marvel at the Shipple Dips as they unanimously (?) agree that there is A Right Way to do something... like cut a watermelon. Then, it's time for a new entry in the Paper Mario franchise which means: Paper Ships! Newspaper? That counts? From a book? That counts too! Related to paper in some mysterious third way (that also might be the first way)? OF COURSE THAT COUNTS TOO. Hosted on Acast. See acast.com/privacy for more information.

How much time could you, realistically, stay with your serial-killer-hunting boyfriend after they use their most EXTRA techniques to make your son cry? (Boy, these things are getting dark.) Then: The Old Guard is out on Netflix, which means it's time to discuss Unkillable Ships. Immortal beings? People that die, but keep coming back? Or just ships so gross Ryan, Patrick and Colin will never convince Kelly to let them die? Hosted on Acast. See acast.com/privacy for more information.

A dramatic reading of an Am I The Asshole leads to some serious questions about what hobbies are deal breakers. Funko Pops? Always a broken deal. Then, Hamilton is on Disney Plus, so the Dippers are talkin' Musical Ships! That Thing You Do! A Goofy Movie! The King and I! My Fair Lady! Little Shop of Horrors! Chicago! Hosted on Acast. See acast.com/privacy for more information.

This week, the shippers are taking a break, but we didn't want to leave your feeds empty. As regular listeners know, Ryan has a WB Alien drama close to her heart and Patrick is a good friend up for adventure. Together, they host Welcome Back to Roswell, a show dedicated to recapping the 90's teen soap Roswell and the current adult soap Roswell, New Mexico. RNM season 2 is on Netflix this week, so enjoy this ep and then start the binge of your life. It's pretty addictive, so you should be done just in time to listen to a new episode of Same Day Shipping next week. Hosted on Acast. See acast.com/privacy for more information.

A conversation about following a boy to New York turns into a Sliding Doors "What If?" scenario. Magic and time travel and retcons... ships are tough.... so tough they die? AND COME SHAMBLING BACK TO LIFE AS ZOMBIES? Is it possible we've never done zombie ships before? Shrug emoji on this one - pretty sure it's a new topic. Hosted on Acast. See acast.com/privacy for more information.

Is it a total violation to know what someone is thinking just because you hear the song that's in their heart? I mean, probably? Then, while the Shippledips usually prefer to see their ships sail, maybe some sexual tension is better left unresolved. It's time for Unresolved Sexual Tension (UST) Ships! Hosted on Acast. See acast.com/privacy for more information.

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