STAB! Cuts

"Reorganization" is a popular prompt often appearing in a typical episode of the comedy podcast program: STAB! In it comedians are given an existing acronym, asked to re-imagine it and share with the audience what it now stand for, and who it represent. Fancy some fully funny frank frivolity? Nick Pettigrew's got you covered in this mouth full of a reimagining of the acronym FFS. Open wide frankophiles! Listen to more episodes HERE: open.spotify.com/show/0xmvKeKEl5D24RCiKOvWvX

"Dating Profiles of the Fictional and or Non-Fictional" pretty much says it all. Our comics are asked to create online dating profiles for anything from celebrities to inanimate objects. Big trucks have big needs! And if you're gonna try to get under the hood of THIS Lifted 2020 Super Duty Ford F-350 Platinum Everest Edition, Molly Doan needs you to know that you'd better be ready to crush some manifold! Listen to more episodes HERE: https://open.spotify.com/show/0xmvKeKEl5D24RCiKOvWvX

"Reorganization" is a popular prompt often appearing in a typical episode of the comedy podcast program: STAB! In it comedians are given an existing acronym, asked to re-imagine it and share with the audience what it now stand for, and who it represent. Sometimes jokes can go too far, even when you're NBA Legend, Larry Bird. Eric Barger takes us on the journey of three friends, Ike, and Nick and Larry Bird, in his take on IANALB. Yummy, yum yum! Hear the full episode HERE: www.stitcher.com/embed/56580/89882223

With "Write a Poem About It" STAB! wordsmiths are asked to spin verse of either the Angry, Erotic, or Instructional variety. Slam, sonnet, free verse, all styles are welcome, how ever the words move them. Science and comedy share so many elements. Like manganese and neon. Court Hansen expresses the periodic table of elements in the only way that makes any sense: in the form of a slam poem. The science nerds will get it. Hear the full episode HERE: https://spoti.fi/2N8gsxC

In STAB!'s "Department of Tourism", comedians are assigned the role of the new director of a made up city’s tourism board and charged with the task of trying to make us want to visit their city. They do that in many ways, these are some of them. Come see what everybody's groaning about in SillyJokesylvania! Let Jesse Jones show you around the rib tickling, eye rolling paradise that IS SillyJokesylvania! Knock-knock, (who's there?) Play. (play who?) Play this STAB! Cut now and enjoy! Hear the full episode HERE: https://spoti.fi/2qyGOgs

With "Write a Poem About It" STAB! wordsmiths are asked to spin verse of either the Angry, Erotic, or Instructional variety. Slam, sonnet, free verse, all styles are welcome, how ever the words move them. Even Stephen Ferris can't believe what he's about to read, in this ode to the tight, enveloping power of the compression sock, and HE wrote it. Share with him the joy that only purposefully tight hosiery can provide. Hear the full episode HERE: https://spoti.fi/2pNG7zD

"Dating Profiles of the Fictional and or Non-Fictional" pretty much says it all. Our comics are asked to create online dating profiles for anything from celebrities to inanimate objects. Funkalicious beats, rock climbing, COOKING! Edgar Granados invites you to get to know Acid Jazz, learn to fly in a world of mystery and fusion. Scat with Edgar, feel the moment, let loose, let your spirit jog through time and space! Listen to the entire episode HERE: https://podknife.com/episodes/1745837

"Reorganization" is a popular prompt often appearing in a typical episode of the comedy podcast program: STAB! In it comedians are given an existing acronym, asked to re-imagine it and share with the audience what it now stand for, and who it represent. There are a lot of ways to resolve conflicts. Here, Jesse Jones encourages you to consider presenting your POOP when trouble rears it's smelly head. Because Pleasant Options Open Possibilities! Hear the full episode HERE: http://www.stitcher.com/s?eid=46218150

With "Write a Poem About It" STAB! wordsmiths are asked to spin verse of either the Angry, Erotic, or Instructional variety. Slam, sonnet, free verse, all styles are welcome, how ever the words move them. It's not that Chris Emery was the first to see it, but he WAS the first to articulate the desire that we all have deep down inside for these tiny butt holes, covered in cheese. Hear the full episode HERE: http://www.stitcher.com/s?eid=43570158

In STAB!'s "Department of Tourism", comedians are assigned the role of the new director of a made up city’s tourism board and charged with the task of trying to make us want to visit their city. They do that in many ways, these are some of them. Have you always thought a place with streets lined with broken dreams and discarded hentai magazines would make a perfect place to call home? INDUBITABLY! Well so has Joe-Joe Louis, so let him show you around Joe-Joe-A-Ville! Hear the full episode HERE: http://www.stitcher.com/s?eid=43186549

"Dating Profiles of the Fictional and or Non-Fictional" pretty much says it all. Our comics are asked to create online dating profiles for anything from celebrities to inanimate objects. Hey dork! Listen to Jesse Jones tell you about the internal conflicts that a middle school bully has to deal with all while tryin' to find someone to punch walls with! And how important Aerosmith is to DEALING! Listen to the entire episode HERE: http://www.stitcher.com/s?eid=43570158

With "Write a Poem About It" STAB! wordsmiths are asked to spin verse of either the Angry, Erotic, or Instructional variety. Slam, sonnet, free verse, all styles are welcome, how ever the words move them. It's a poem two-fer! Jordan Gannon just couldn't poetically express himself properly with a single poem about yoga pants, so he crammed in two. You lucky so-and-so! Hear the full episode HERE: http://www.stitcher.com/s?eid=37181510

"Celebration Time"/"This Was Today Once" invites guests to share how they are, will or have celebrated historic or not so historic moments that just so happened to fall on the day of the show. Tyler Kinney uses the power of misrepresentation to build an empire on Catfish Day. So many jet skis and llamas, just there for the taking, and all you have to do is make someone feel special. Hear the full episode HERE: http://www.stitcher.com/s?eid=45078351

"Dating Profiles of the Fictional and or Non-Fictional" pretty much says it all. Our comics are asked to create online dating profiles for anything from celebrities to inanimate objects. Sometimes you just need a cozy night in, with a little sip of red. Danielle Mandella shares the dating profile of the home body we sometimes forget about, resulting in blood toxicity. Listen to the entire episode HERE: http://www.stitcher.com/s?eid=38230865

With "Write a Poem About It" STAB! wordsmiths are asked to spin verse of either the Angry, Erotic, or Instructional variety. Slam, sonnet, free verse, all styles are welcome, how ever the words move them. Alfonso Portela gives a fresh re-interpretation of a holiday classic, telling the story of the psychological effect of seeing Mommy giving Santa Clause a special kind of kiss. Hear the full episode HERE: http://www.stitcher.com/s?eid=41800830

"Celebration Time"/"This Was Today Once" invites guests to share how they are, will or have celebrated historic or not so historic moments that just so happened to fall on the day of the show. Behold the decree of High Emperor Groucho the Second (Jesse Jones)! No, you'll actually like the decrees. They're pretty awesome. Grab a knife and bowl! You'll need 'em! Hear the full episode HERE: http://www.stitcher.com/s?eid=41551532

In STAB!'s "Department of Tourism", comedians are assigned the role of the new director of a made up city’s tourism board and charged with the task of trying to make us want to visit their city. They do that in many ways, these are some of them. Get in your car which has been likened in size, to a WHALE, and come on down to B-52s-atopia, Ben Feldman's gonna show you around and maybe take you out for some LOBSTER! Hear the full episode HERE: http://www.stitcher.com/s?eid=41844782

"Dating Profiles of the Fictional and or Non-Fictional" pretty much says it all. Our comics are asked to create online dating profiles for anything from celebrities to inanimate objects. It's tough to get back out there after one of the most famous cases of immaculate infidelity in the history of the printed word, but Tyler Kinney helps the Virgin Mary try to get back on the market. Listen to the entire episode HERE: http://www.stitcher.com/s?eid=36643294

"Location, Location, Location" gives our comedians the task of selling us on why we should come to their business, despite it's less than ideal location. Hey pally, you need a little help in your kingdom of squares? Well then let Jesse Jones tell you all about deez guys he knows at Front Row Professionals. Dey GAHDIT! Listen to the entire episode HERE: http://bit.ly/1Tpvtox

In "Vows to an Asshole" panelists are presented with a universally recognized asshole, to whom they will be professing their undying love and commitment in their own personally prepared wedding vows. Under this altar of woven limbs, Alfonso Portela proclaims his love for Vlad the Impaler to be ever greater than any stack of dead babies this or any other world world has ever known. Listen to the entire episode HERE: http://www.stitcher.com/s?eid=39940050

"Location, Location, Location" gives our comedians the task of selling us on why we should come to their business, despite it's less than ideal location. Zach's not a smart man, but what he does know is tasty. So come on down to one of his three Panda Express locations in this world where all the people are made of orange chicken! He promises not to serve you... As food... Listen to the entire episode HERE: http://www.stitcher.com/s?eid=40514483

In "Vows to an Asshole" panelists are presented with a universally recognized asshole, to whom they will be professing their undying love and commitment in their own personally prepared wedding vows. Here Cheryl Anderson reads her heart felt vows to a Parking Enforcement Officer, it is a love which will last for a very specific period of time, a love which can be removed at the owner's expense if all signs are not fully read and understood. Listen to the entire episode HERE: http://www.stitcher.com/s?eid=40184334

"Reorganization" is a popular prompt often appearing in a typical episode of the comedy podcast program: STAB! In it comedians are given an existing acronym, asked to re-imagine it and share with the audience what it now stand for, and who it represent. It's difficult, being a person of any color other than white, and holding off the forces of caucasia. Alfonso Portela knows the struggle and shares it with you in his story of TWA or Total White Assimilation. Hear the full episode HERE: http://www.stitcher.com/s?eid=40322518

"Reorganization" is a popular prompt often appearing in a typical episode of the comedy podcast program: STAB! In it comedians are given an existing acronym, asked to re-imagine it and share with the audience what it now stand for, and who it represent. Heterosexual threesomes can be fraught with danger. Just check out the news (http://negrosagainsthairlineabuse.com/sticky-situation/)! If only they'd heard Jesse Jones' rules for the HTTP, a life may have been saved... Hear the full episode HERE: http://www.stitcher.com/s?eid=40153384

In "Movie Make Up", comics are given movie titles, which we (John) have (has) made up, and are then asked to give a synopsis of that new movie, from any genre or style that they so choose, inspired by the fake title. There is an old Spanish Folktale that is known by Jesse Jones which speaks of the day El Diablo taught young Manuel a valuable lesson: Be a Cock, have Cock fingers! It's a weird folk tale... Listen to the entire episode HERE: http://www.stitcher.com/s?eid=40271145

"Location, Location, Location" gives our comedians the task of selling us on why we should come to their business, despite it's less than ideal location. Hey, hi, hi. Need vape supplies? Need lunch? Edgar Granados wants, he NEEDS you to come to Harold L. Vaperman's House of Vape! These prices are so low and this business is so illegal. Please buy something, but don't tell the principal! Listen to the entire episode HERE: http://www.stitcher.com/s?eid=40271145

"Location, Location, Location" gives our comedians the task of selling us on why we should come to their business, despite it's less than ideal location. English and brethren alike, Nick Brunner invites you to enjoy the fellowship of Honest Abraham Yoder's Loaves and Fishnets for the finest in good Amish fishnettery. Listen to the entire episode HERE: http://www.stitcher.com/s?eid=40271145

In STAB!'s "Department of Tourism", comedians are assigned the role of the new director of a made up city’s tourism board and charged with the task of trying to make us want to visit their city. They do that in many ways, these are some of them. COME, join Tyler Kinney on the Isle of Soft Rock where you can be who you want to be, hip, confident and unafraid of disease. Do mind the rocks they are quite soft. Hear the full episode HERE: http://www.stitcher.com/s?eid=41182368

"Location, Location, Location" gives our comedians the task of selling us on why we should come to their business, despite it's less than ideal location. Daughters! Get YOUR daughters here! Jesse Jones introduces you to suspicious unmarked vans and the daughters that used to be yours in Bill Jackson's Unsupervised Daughter Abductiporium! Listen to the entire episode HERE: http://www.stitcher.com/s?eid=40153384

"Celebration Time"/"This Was Today Once" invites guests to share how they are, will or have celebrated historic or not so historic moments that just so happened to fall on the day of the show. Edgar Granados buys a ticket and takes the ride through a twisted celebration of the birthday of the Canseco twins. Like nothing before and nothing after, achieve maximum pump. Hear the full episode HERE: http://www.stitcher.com/s?eid=36643793

"Reorganization" is a popular prompt often appearing in a typical episode of the comedy podcast program: STAB! In it comedians are given an existing acronym, asked to re-imagine it and share with the audience what it now stand for, and who it represent. Let Jordan Gannon introduce you to Christian Rap-Rock powerhouse Returning Savior Very Probable. You may remember them from their self titled smash: RSVP, featuring that hot track RSVP... It's RSVP time! Hear the full episode HERE: http://www.stitcher.com/s?eid=37794781

"Reorganization" is a popular prompt often appearing in a typical episode of the comedy podcast program: STAB! In it comedians are given an existing acronym, asked to re-imagine it and share with the audience what it now stand for, and who it represent. Early 90s Long Island hasidic hip-hop was molded largely by the Jewtang Clan and their break out star ODB or "Old Dirty Bagel". Just listen to all this sick knowledge dropped by music historian Josh Kinkade on ODB. Hear the full episode HERE: http://www.stitcher.com/s?eid=39561312

"Reorganization" is a popular prompt often appearing in a typical episode of the comedy podcast program: STAB! In it comedians are given an existing acronym, asked to re-imagine it and share with the audience what it now stand for, and who it represent. Jesse Jones introduces you to the kick ass Bishop of Modesto with the baddest number this side of the Intimidator's SWEET #3. It's PG-13: Pope Gary the 13th! Hear the full episode HERE: http://www.stitcher.com/s?eid=39940050

In STAB!'s "Department of Tourism", comedians are assigned the role of the new director of a made up city’s tourism board and charged with the task of trying to make us want to visit their city. They do that in many ways, these are some of them. Tyler Kinney invites you to the only place you deserve to go. East Suicide City. Make the decision that you've always known in your heart was the one for you. Take a trip to East Suicide City. Hear the full episode HERE: http://www.stitcher.com/s?eid=39818928

"Location, Location, Location" gives our comedians the task of selling us on why we should come to their business, despite it's less than ideal location. Ever wanted to make it in the entertainment industry but knew you weren't? Well Luke Soin has just the talent agency for you. Bring your average talent to ItsNeverGoingToBeMoreThanAHobby.com! and don't be discovered, TODAY! Listen to the entire episode HERE: http://www.stitcher.com/s?eid=40153384

"Reorganization" is a popular prompt often appearing in a typical episode of the comedy podcast program: STAB! In it comedians are given an existing acronym, asked to re-imagine it and share with the audience what it now stand for, and who it represent. If you're going to a pet store, you damn sure better know the lingo. Bill Wallis helps you navigate the difficult animal enslavement center jargon in this LMNOP. Hear the full episode HERE: http://www.stitcher.com/s?eid=39652981

"Location, Location, Location" gives our comedians the task of selling us on why we should come to their business, despite it's less than ideal location. You wanna learn the mystical arts of self defense? Sure you do. Bojuka, Nindokai, Kajukenbo? Gary knows all that shit. So come on down to Gary Davidson's Tire Care Center And Discount Dojoarium. Listen to the entire episode HERE: http://www.stitcher.com/s?eid=39652981

"Location, Location, Location" gives our comedians the task of selling us on why we should come to their business, despite it's less than ideal location. Hi, Dr. Alfonso Portela, speech pathologist and hater of flappy hands would like to show you his tried and true methods for helping the tongueless learn to be understood. And boy does it work, wihwy. Listen to the entire episode HERE: http://www.stitcher.com/s?eid=39940050

"Reorganization" is a popular prompt often appearing in a typical episode of the comedy podcast program: STAB! In it comedians are given an existing acronym, asked to re-imagine it and share with the audience what it now stand for, and who it represent. In this fortunately misunderstood mashup of prompts, Stephen Ferris gives us more ways to go rub ass than any of us had ever imagined possible. But remember, these are the exceptions to the rule of "Never Rub Ass". Listen to the full episode HERE: http://www.stitcher.com/s?eid=38315836

"Location, Location, Location" gives our comedians the task of selling us on why we should come to their business, despite it's less than ideal location. Everyone needs to keep up with the latest fashions, even in the aftermath of the most terrible nuclear accident in the history of man (or horse) kind. Come on down to Yuri's! Listen to the entire episode HERE: http://www.stitcher.com/s?eid=37694835

In STAB!'s "Department of Tourism", comedians are assigned the role of the new director of a made up city’s tourism board and charged with the task of trying to make us want to visit their city. They do that in many ways, these are some of them. Wanna see some really fuckin' cool stuff that isn't just cool to Jaclyn Weiand, but will be cool to you too? Well visit the Island of Fuckin' Cool Stuff and Jaclyn'll show you all about it! Hear the full episode HERE: http://www.stitcher.com/s?eid=38006476

"Location, Location, Location" gives our comedians the task of selling us on why we should come to their business, despite it's less than ideal location. Hear how Tyler Kinney will drag your Chicago Bulls t-shirts through the sad, godforsaken waters of his Orangi Town Laundromat for just ONE Chinesy coin. Listen to the entire episode HERE: http://www.stitcher.com/s?eid=37544776

"Reorganization" is a popular prompt often appearing in a typical episode of the comedy podcast program: STAB! In it comedians are given an existing acronym, asked to re-imagine it and share with the audience what it now stand for, and who it represent. Jesse Jones shares with the gathered audience members, (one in six of which will own a shawl at some point in their lives) a sampling of his hand sorted, "Increasingly Useless Data". Listen to the full episode HERE: http://www.stitcher.com/s?eid=37544776

In STAB!'s "Department of Tourism", comedians are assigned the role of the new director of a made up city’s tourism board and charged with the task of trying to make us want to visit their city. They do that in many ways, these are some of them. Joe-Joe Louis invites you to the town of Normandy. Never mind the big wall of dead people, Normandy has so much more to offer visitors. So come on down! Listen to the full episode HERE: http://www.stitcher.com/s?eid=36865569

In STAB!'s "Department of Tourism", comedians are assigned the role of the new director of a made up city’s tourism board and charged with the task of trying to make us want to visit their city. They do that in many ways, these are some of them. Luke Soin invites us to experience the NEW tight, taut, TikiBarberopolis and forget its old frumpy, round with child location. Listen to the full episode HERE: http://www.stitcher.com/s?eid=37181489

In STAB!'s "Department of Tourism", comedians are assigned the role of the new director of a made up city’s tourism board and charged with the task of trying to make us want to visit their city. They do that in many ways, these are some of them. Come, visit one of the most popular destinations in all of the Nintendo Entertainment System. Jesse Jones is here to show you around. And why not listen to the complete episode HERE: http://www.stitcher.com/s?eid=37045471

In STAB!'s "Department of Tourism", comedians are assigned the role of the new director of a made up city’s tourism board and charged with the task of trying to make us want to visit their city. They do that in many ways, these are some of them. Jon Gomora would like to invite you to stay away from the thriving city of Sassyburgh, where they're probably talking shit about you right now. Hear the full episode HERE: http://www.stitcher.com/s?eid=37181510

"Reorganization" is a popular prompt often appearing in a typical episode of the comedy podcast program: STAB! In it comedians are given an existing acronym, asked to re-imagine it and share with the audience what it now stand for, and who it represent. Jordan Gannon introduces young CHAMPS to this early childhood misogyny education program. Beat misogyny into cold fearful submission! Hear the full episode HERE: http://www.stitcher.com/s?eid=37181510

"Location, Location, Location" gives our comedians the task of selling us on why we should come to their business, despite it's less than ideal location. Come to the finest non-rubble gentlemen's club in the whole of the disputed Gaza strip! Jesse Jones sells you on all its amenities. Hear the full episode HERE: http://www.stitcher.com/s?eid=36643650

"Location, Location, Location" gives our comedians the task of selling us on why we should come to their business, despite it's less than ideal location. Really need to snazzy up the foyer of your mega yacht so as to avoid razzing from tuna magnates? Tyler Kinney has just the place to fill all your flat pack needs: Ikea Dubai. Listen to the full episode HERE: http://www.stitcher.com/s?eid=36643294