Stepping Off Now: Support for Neurodivergent Creatives
by Kendra Patterson
Hello, and welcome to the Stepping Off Now podcast. I'm Kendra, an AuDHD writer, and this is my safe space for talking about the challenges of being a neurodivergent creative and the lessons I'm learning along the way. It's a little bit dark and a little bit visceral, but always honest. I hope that it can be a safe space for you too, where you feel seen and validated wether or not you identify as neurodivergent yourself. All gentle souls are welcome, and my goal is to provide solace and support. The world at large may not understand or appreciate you, but I do. We are not alone in our struggles, and we are stronger and wiser than we know. We can do this.
Episodes
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E171. Neurodivergent Burnout: Why It Happens and What It Feels Like
In which I trace the origins of my relapse into burnout and discuss how it differs from depression (which can co-occur). Also in this episode: updates on my weightlifting journey and my newfound obsession with slime.
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E170. Assessing Safe vs. Unsafe When Interacting with the Neurotypical World
In which I discuss a recent mistake I made in following neurotypical advice, and the lesson I learned about how important it is for neurodivergent folks to know how to assess what is safe for their nervous systems before taking action. Also in this episode: my podcast's mini rebrand and a…
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E169. The Ironies of Being a Neurodivergent Writer
In which I discuss my relapse into burnout with its enmeshment of intersecting ironies. Also: my evolving understanding of myself as a neurodivergent person and an update on my creative endeavors.
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E168. Not Letting the Big Picture Sabotage Your Creativity
Managing a large creative project that must be done in stages and with attention to what seems like a million intertwined details is a skill that must be learned through trial and error. Most projects are in the "ugly" stage until they are very near completion, and this can be frustrating and...
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E167. Interview Episode! Featuring Kristin Kisska, Author of The Hint of Light
Note: my microphone wasn't working properly for the interview portion of this episode; I apologize for the less-than-ideal sound quality of my parts. At last the long-awaited first installment of my author interview series! KRISTIN KISSKA used to be a finance geek, complete with her MBA and Wall...
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E166. Maintaining Motivation for Creative Work in Challenging Seasons
Here in Florida our challenging season is summer--it's both broiling hot and rainy. My backyard turns into a literal swamp. It can be hard to maintain motivation for our creative work when the weather and climate are so uncomfortable. Maybe in your area it's winter that's the challenging season.…
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E165. How Doing Art Constitutes Resistance
As I contemplate ways I can resist against the forces of chaos and cruelty holding sway in society, I am sometimes dismayed by my own limits. But I am not utterly powerless. In this episode I discuss the many ways in which doing art can be a form of resistance. Dina Brodsky's Instagram Athena...
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E164. Is the Ability to Make Choices More Important to Art than Creativity?
Beyond passion, skill, and commitment, there is another quality that defines what it is to be an artist: the ability to make choices in your art and follow through on them. In this episode I contemplate how being stuck in art (and life) is often more the result of a fear of making wrong choices...
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E163. A New Theory of Talent
I've long thought that talent is the least important ingredient in artistic success (however you define that). The further I get in my writing career, the less it seems to matter whether I have any "natural" talent. What matters is consistent and sustained effort over time. In this episode I...
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E162. Creative Practice and the Artist's Illusion
In which I share my thoughts on how creative practice helps us handle the often difficult conditions of the artist's life: how long and hard we have to work to establish ourselves, the mental health struggles many of us face, and the competition inherent in a glutted market.
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E161. What Taking on a Second Creative Practice Has Taught Me (+ Some Thoughts on Disruption)
I recently added a second creative practice to my roster of creative activities: watercolor painting. While I definitely felt ready for this big step, it has nonetheless served as a disruption in my life and to my understanding of the role of creativity in my life. In this episode I contemplate…
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E160. Learning to Use Conceptual Tools as an Intuitive Creative: Is It Possible?
Creatives and artists can be roughly divided into two types: intuitive and conceptual. Many do successfully combine both styles, but I have never been able to. I am a strongly intuitive writer and have historically failed at incorporating conceptual tools, like outlining and plotting, into my...
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E159. What Role Do Artists Play in Society? It May Not Be What You Think
As the wheel of history lurches forward I've been thinking about what role I play in society as an artist. What do I contribute? How can I make a positive difference? Typically this kind of discussion focuses on the artist's art, but I've taken a different view. I want to know what role artists...
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E158. Interview Episode! What Health Looks Like Through the Lens of Creative Practice
In a twist on a classic interview episode, in this one friend of the pod Ann Wainscott returns to interview someone herself! Links from this episode: Switched on Pop's Madonna episode No.1, No.2, and No.3 Daniel Mason's novel North Woods
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E157. Finding Psychological Safety in a Tumultuous World as a Sensitive Creative
When you are a highly sensitive gentle soul, the chaos and cruelty of the world can feel unbearable at times. How are we to protect ourselves while still engaging? In this episode I discuss this in light of my own thoughts on the recent US election results. My sister's Instagram account...
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E156. How I Learned to Take Myself Less Seriously...and More Seriously
Have you ever been told you take yourself too seriously? I heard this all the time growing up. And it was both right...and wrong. In this episode I discuss how I held myself back from reaching for my creative dreams both by taking myself too seriously and not seriously enough. Sound confusing?...
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E155. Why You Really Really REALLY Shouldn't Listen to Advice (*With Some Exceptions)
I wasted years of my life following other people's advice about how I should be writing novels and developing my creative practice, and it mostly failed me. So finally I decided to chuck it all out the window, go against the grain, and listen to myself. In this episode I discuss why we mostly...
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E154. Does Structure Constrain or Free Us?
I am using my current project, novel #2, to master plot, my weakest area as a writer. In the past, I've been ambivalent and even felt antipathy toward applying commercial and Western-style plot structures to my novels, because I felt they constrained my art. So what's changed? In this episode I...
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E153. Preliminary Thoughts on Being a Neurodivergent Creative
In this episode I discuss my recent diagnosis of being neurodivergent, including why I pursued a formal diagnosis, what it entails, and its relationship to creativity and my art.
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E152. Are the Things We Suck At Actually Special Talents in Disguise?
With novel #1 winding its way toward publication (hopefully), I have officially begun work on novel #2...and I've realized I will have to approach writing it in an entirely different way. Not only that, I'm going to have to use a technique I have utterly failed at in the past: preplanning the…
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E151. When All You Have Is a Drum... Play
I'm not really sure how to summarize this episode, y'all...but you'll want to listen! Contact me
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E150. The OG Society Thought Experiment: Why and How We Share Our Art
Sometimes it can be difficult to see how our own societies and cultures influence us. I have this trick I use to help reveal some of those hidden influences that I call the OG Society Thought Experiment. I imagine how a small pre-capitalist "original society" would have functioned and compare…
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E149. Are Big Dreams Bad for Us? Learning to Not Miss the Stars
In this episode I take stock of where I am in my creative journey as I contemplate what lies beyond the dreams we hold for ourselves. Are dreams holding us back? Do they ultimately make our lives less happy and satisfying? W.H. Auden's poem, The More Loving One Contact me
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E148. Looking for Your Lights in the Dark
Notice: The Kishōtenketsu Workshop I am doing with Andy Mort is coming up next week! You can find more info and sign up a this link. In this episode I discuss two women I've learned about recently who are lights in the dark for me. They inspire me to keep going through tough times, and to not…
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E147. In Search of Continuities in Our Artistic Identity
I recently discovered a notebook filled with poetry I wrote thirty (!) years ago, and in one fell swoop it reconfigured my understanding of myself as an artist. In this episode I contemplate the threads that define who we are as artists that weave their way through our lifelong body of work...
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E146. In Which I Read My Short Story "The Trash House"
In summer I like to mix it up on this podcast, so I decided to share some of my short stories. "The Trash House" is a women-centered retooling of the Japanese Kitsune (fox) folklore. Enjoy!
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E145. Re-Envisioning the Creative Journey through the Kishotenketsu Lens
Last episode I discussed the "conflict free" Japanese Kishotenketsu storytelling framework as a gentler alternative to the Western-style Hero's Journey. In this one I contrast the two as lenses through which we can interpret our creative lives. The Hero's Journey, though it may make for…
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E144. Special Release: The Calming Effects of Kishotenketsu Narrative Structure
I'm dealing with some personal life stuff right now and so dug into my Patreon archive for an episode for you all today! In this one I discuss the Japanese (and more broadly Asian) narrative structure called Kishotenketsu. This is generally seen as being a low-conflict or even conflict-free form…
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E143: The Writing Conference and Live Pitching Experience
Last week I made the trek down to Tampa to attend a writer's conference and live pitch my novel to two agents! This type of experience can be overwhelming for creatives who are highly sensitive or have other types of sensory processing conditions--or for those who struggle with anxiety and/or...
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E142. Handling Rejection Sensitivity for Neurodiverse and Highly Sensitive Creatives
Rejection sensitivity is one of the primary challenges neurodiverse and highly sensitive creatives face in reaching for their dreams. It can cause us to isolate, not seek out opportunities to share or showcase our work, or even keep us from doing creative work in the first place. If we do put...
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E141. Following What's Alive in Your Creative Work
This episode begins with an update on my preparations for the writers' conference I'm attending in Tampa on April 12. You can skip ahead to the 10:36 mark for the topical discussion. We're often counseled to follow our own vision or intuition in our creative work, but what does that actually look...
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E140. Update Episode! Plans for Pitching My Novel
At loooooooong last, I am (nearly! almost!) ready to start querying my novel to agents, so I decided it was the right time to do an update episode on where things stand and my plans going forward. I touch on topics such as what it feels like to be done, preparing for querying, and finding...
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E139. Ordinary vs. Extraordinary Times in the Creative Process
Most timelines of the creative process depict it as linear and progressive, an "up and to the right" trajectory (like on a graph). But what I am finding in the final stretch of writing my novel, though, that this phase is entirely different from every part of the process that came before. Nothing...
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E138. Recognizing and Recovering from a Creativity Injury
My sister is a competitive cyclist, and we enjoy discussing the similarities between athletic practice and creative practice. The other day she was telling me about how she and the cyclists she coaches recognize, treat, and recover from physical injuries. It made me wonder: can creatives and...
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E137. Good vs. Bad Discomfort in Creative Practice and Life
I credit my creative practice with helping me recover from my life-altering burnout at the end of my PhD. I've maintained from the beginning (and often talked about in this podcast) that creative work should feel good most of the time. For many years I've been gentle and compassionate with myself...
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E136. Crafting Your Artist Origin Story
Have you ever noticed that successful artists' backstories often sound like destined paths or hero's journeys? Learning how to tell your own mythologized origin story is an essential tool for any artist. Listen to this episode to find out why and how to do it. I am indebted to the podcast episode...
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E135. Magical Thinking in the Creative Life: Use and Misuse
I am a lifelong magical thinker, but in recent years have rejected it in favor of a more realistic (read: pessimistic/cynical haha) perspective. This holiday season, though, I have decided that I will once again let myself believe in magic. But am I ready to indulge in magical thinking in a...
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E134. Celebrating Not Accomplishing Goals
There's no question that setting and achieving goals is beneficial...right? But what about when it's not? Creativity requires us to become adept at allowing ourselves to be swept off course. In this episode I discuss why we struggle so much to deviate from plan, why this can harm our creative...
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E133. Connecting With Your Greater Purpose for Your Art
In these final difficult months of getting my novel ready for agent submissions, thinking about my art's greater purpose is serving as an important motivator. In this episode I discuss why I think it's best to save contemplating your art's greater purpose for the later stages of creation, how to...
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E132. Maintaining a Creative Practice Under Conditions of High Stress
When life gets messy, it's tempting to put our creative work aside until we have the space and energy for inspiration again. But this is no good if you are trying to finish a project or if you are dedicated to maintaining a serious creative practice as an artist or a mental health practice. In…
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E131. Developing Your Artistic Voice
Sorry for the lateness of this episode, I'm dealing with some very noisy construction at my house that is interfering with my recording schedule. In this episode I provide a brief update on my novel polishing and throw out some thoughts I have on what artistic voice is and how to develop it.
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E130. The Deadline Experiment
What happens when someone who hates deadlines decides to try one out? Listen to hear all about my recent experience of setting a deadline for myself to finish my novel. Spoiler: I hit it! In this episode I talk about why I'm usually against deadlines, when they are useful, how to know if you are...
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E129. How Not to Get Stuck in the Doldrums of Almost Done
Why is it that after all the work you've put into your creative project you hit your biggest resistance when you can finally see the finish line? This is what happened to me this summer when I was trying to finish my novel (which will be done next week!!!). Turns out this is totally normal, and…
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E128. (Final) Summer Updates + Upcoming Programming
This is my final update on this strange summer that was full of change, growth, and pure panic, if I'm honest! I'll be returning to my regular type of programming in a couple weeks, and in this episode I give you a taste of the episodes topics I'm planning. They are all based on my experiences…
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E127. Summer Updates + Creative Breakthrough
I finally have some excellent news to share! I've had a creative breakthrough on my novel and am on track to finish it by mid-September. In this episode I share what led to the breakthrough, what it feels like, and my tentative plans for when I'm done.
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E126. Summer Updates + Redefining My Creative Identity
This is a grab bag of an episode in which I tell a long and rambling story about what getting my house tented for drywood termites has to do with the Empire State Building, share my thoughts on what I've learned about creative process as I've worked through my writer's block, give two examples of...
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E125. Summer Updates + Thoughts on Humbling Yourself to Art
In which I talk about how I'm working through my current writer's block and the importance of surrendering to the ebb and flow of creativity. Here is the newsletter by Nick Cave that I discuss in this episode.
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E124. Some Changes Going Forward
In which I discuss some recent developments in my life and the steps I am taking to deal with the circumstances.
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E123. A Defense of the Lone Wolf
Many creatives and artists have a bit of the lone wolf in them. But generally speaking, being a lone wolf is looked down on in society. In this episode I mount a defense of this personality type and discuss some of the things that make lone wolves awesome human beings worthy of understanding…
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E122. Three Kinds of Creative Boredom and How to Handle Them
What do you do when you lose steam with your creative projects or practice? Nothing will block you faster than feeling bored with your work. When your inspiration and motivation go missing, though, there are some simple remedies that can get you back on track. In this episode I discuss the three...
About this show
Hello, and welcome to the Stepping Off Now podcast. I'm Kendra, an AuDHD writer, and this is my safe space for talking about the challenges of being a neurodivergent creative and the lessons I'm learning along the way. It's a little bit dark and a little bit visceral, but always honest. I hope that it can be a safe space for you too, where you feel seen and validated wether or not you identify as neurodivergent yourself. All gentle souls are welcome, and my goal is to provide solace and support. The world at large may not understand or appreciate you, but I do. We are not alone in our struggles, and we are stronger and wiser than we know. We can do this.
Hosted by
Kendra Patterson