Tales From A Cult Insider
by Jared Garrett
Here is a podcast where I tell stories about growing up in a fairly well-known cult. Starting as the Process Church of the Final Judgement in the UK and morphing into the Foundation Faith of God in the US - it was controversial in many ways. It evolved over the years and now has no religion, functioning solely as Best Friends Animal Society. There's much that hasn't been told about 30+ kids that were 'raised' in this cult. Cult orphans is a fair way to describe us. These are stories of my growing up in this cult along with lessons learned and some episodes with my sister. Please support!
Episodes
-
Forgiveness v Freedom
As I'm working out guests for the podcast and getting the schedules to line up, I've also been reflecting on this idea of healing through truth-telling. I want more of that healing. I'm greedy. I want to be free. I yearn for freedom from the tendrils and chains of what those cultists did to me -...
-
Next Guest: My Dad - Part Two
This is the second half of the session with just me and my father. He adds more detail and we have a good opportunity to keep proving the truth that there's always more to the story. Also, he's a great dude and I love him. Thank you as always! Don't forget to rate and share!
-
Next Guest: My Dad - Part One
My dad stuck around to share more interesting details and more from his perspective about how his life was in the Process, then the Foundation Faith of God. Thank you all for returning to the podcast, and thank everyone who is just finding it! I hope you enjoy this new approach of healing through...
-
First Guests: Dad and Sister - Part Two
My father continues telling his story. Lots of neat details. We do a lot of good for ourselves and others when we not only listen to there stories but also try to help them tell that story. Often, when we have a story to tell, even a true one that is from our experience, we need help and space to...
-
First Guests: Dad and Sister - Part One
As I mentioned, my father was a big driver of getting this started back up. This is the episode where he starts telling his story, with my sister and I adding color commentary, questions, and our own memories here and there. He shares stuff I didn't know at all. It's interesting to realize that...
-
Introduction to Season Two
We're back! In this episode, I share what has happened over the last couple of years that made it necessary to start a sequel season. New information, new photos, strengthened relationships, renewed friendships, and healing opportunities got me thinking, "What if I went back and shared all of…
more -
Surprise! Season Two Intro and Trailer
Surprise, there's more! Lots has happened since "I'm Out" dropped. I've loved the freedom I've felt from the cult as I feel I've truly moved on and healed, so I'm very grateful. But there's more. Like, more guests with unique insight. And more reconnections. And loads more information. So welcome...
-
Tales from a Cult Insider - I'm Out
I needed to record some truly final thoughts while actually on Best Friends property. So I recorded on my phone near a highway and you'll hear cars going by and me being reflective as I take the final step of the journey this podcast has taken me on. I can't overstate how much it means to me that...
-
Episode 44: Grand Finale Recorded with a Live Audience
This is the grand finale episode, recorded in Kanab, only seven miles from Best Friends. Poetic by design! And with a live, not exactly studio, audience! This is a wrap-up episode aimed to provide some closure to myself and all of you wonderful listeners. I think it worked. I share my deepest...
-
Episode 43: Punches Sort of Thrown and Final Thoughts
This is the final of three long, deep episodes with my wonderful sister, Emma. You can find more of her perspective and also her excellent talents on TikTok at spicyemmapanada. We make sure we say what needs to be said, not out of malice but because we will tell the story and we are responsible…
more -
Episode 42: Kids and Siblings and Parents Healing Together... and TikTok
My sister Emma joins me for another wide-ranging, mildly cathartic episode in which we dive into the trauma of constant instability and how that looks today. We also talk about how the cult did our parents dirty and really was a wrecking ball of crap. Start for the silly inside jokes, stay for…
more -
Episode 41: Another Cult Insider - My Sister
The podcast is back. Not epilogues, not bonus episodes. Back with stories and more truth that needs telling. Back with my sister, Emma, for at least the next several episodes. I'm still not trying to bring down the whole thing that used to be the cult that we grew up in. But I'm not happy about...
-
Epilogue 6: Reactions from Me and Others to the Religion News Service Article
Back in January of 2020, before all the crazy, I was contacted by Bob Smietana, who was then the Editor-in-Chief of Religion News Service, a rather impressive and wonderful news outlet that reports on the religious angle of all the newsworthy stuff going down. Bob had found this podcast and was...
-
Epilogue 5: What It's Like to Visit Best Friends Now
You can probably imagine that visiting Best Friends now is odd. In this epilogue episode, I share stories to illustrate some of the strange and disconnected feelings I have visiting there. Spoiler: it's odd. But cool and chill. Remember to review and share this podcast with your chums and bums!
-
Epilogue 4: My Reaction to the Documentary
I learned a lot from watching the documentary that Neil Edwards at TwoFour Entertainment put together. It's a very good documentary with an impressive amount of primary sources, interviews, and footage and audio. Very cool stuff. I had several visceral reactions to this thing. I considered…
more -
Epilogue 3: Nearly Thirty Years Later - I Know What the Cult Believed
Remember that episode I did on what the cult actually believed? Well, my knowledge was far more incomplete than it is now. I received a bunch of material from the director of a documentary about the Process. His name is Neil Edwards and the documentary is called Sympathy for the Devil: The True...
-
Epilogue 2: Finding Parts of Myself - Even Today
Did I ever tell you I was a firefighter? Well, I was. My first call was to rescue young bulls from a truck accident. My first fire was a dumpster fire. No, literally. Also, I talked a lot about how important books were to me, but I don't think I emphasized the power and importance of music in my...
-
Epilogue 1: My Mission to Brazil
This is the first of at least three epilogues. The way I grew up led me to a mission in Brazil and I found a home in the warmth, goodness, and welcome of those people. And I learned and was changed fundamentally. This episode shares some of the more impactful stories from my mission and you will…
more -
Episode 40: Post Cult Story 3 - How I Met Their Mother
Spoiler: I have never seen that show. Not even a single episode - and I'm a big fan of Alyson Hannigan. This episode brings the podcast full-circle from where I started: I wanted a family, to where I am now: I have a family. It's longer because there's a lot of juicy details and intermittently...
-
Episode 39: Bonfires, Poetry, Metallica, Girls, and not LSD
This episode starts with me singing, moves on into me reading a very small part of a poem by Walt Whitman, and then just keeps to that epically high standard. I mean, might as well go out with a bang. But really though, this episode is all about the things that helped me find my identity, my…
more -
Episode 38: Life Immediately After
So it's not like the story of my life in the cult and then out of the cult is ever really going to end. I am who I am due to my circumstances and my choices and I wouldn't go back for anything. That said, we're winding up this big arc and the podcast is going to come to an end soon - with some...
-
Episode 37: The Great Escape
It's the episode you might have been waiting for! I talk about how I finally actually got out of the cult. For a guy whose bread and butter is telling stories, I recognize that this story might be somewhat anti-climactic, but it's not. It's true in all the right ways. I made my choices all the…
more -
Episode 36: The Promenade and Easing In and Out
Okay friends, we're closing in on the story of my escape. But before that, some things changed for us kids. This episode focuses on all of us kids in the Dallas Branch-- also called the Children's Center. I mention a few things I've talked about in the past and put it all together, doing my best…
more -
Episode 35: Memoir Chapter 6: Are You My Father?
I share another chapter of my memoir, in which I tell some stories about learning who my real father is, how my biological family sort of evolved, being a ring-bearer at a cult wedding, and more. I also pose some questions to you, dear listener. I await your response. Merry Christmas!
-
Episode 34: The Children's Ministry
If I were a clickbait headline writer, this episode's title would be: Hypocrisy Made Him This. Click To Be Shocked! The truth is that the name The Children's Ministry might not mean what you think it means. And in this episode, I finally reveal a deep, dark secret that perhaps two people outside…
more -
Episode 33: History and Life of Brian's Bright Side
Given how sort of all over the place the history of the cult is being told in this podcast, I thought it might be useful to really hone the thing's evolution down into a simple explanation of facts, with my own perspective on some of the popular myths about the cult. For example, was it a…
more -
Episode 32: Memoir Chapter 22: The Cult's Life and Death, But Not Really
If you're a long time listener (first time caller :-) ), you know I've written my memoir. I'm revising it now preparatory to sending it to agents. I wanted to share chapter 22 with you, in which I sum up the cult's evolution, and mine as well. It's also a chapter in which I give the cult's…
more -
Episode 31: We Were Robbed
It's episode 31 and I'm talking all about being robbed. I also share some interesting experiences I had with old cult cronies over the last weekend and I answer a listener's excellent question about holidays. The being robbed thing was ongoing, really. But this episode is also about the actual...
-
Episode 30: Post-Cult Story 2 - Don't Cut Off My Hand, Bro!
This title will become self-explanatory, but spoiler: this episode will especially please theater geeks. Stage acting and everything associated with it blessed my life and changed it fundamentally. My baby face might have gotten me roles, but my roles helped me find a voice. I tell the stories of...
-
Episode 29: Night Time Anxiety and Other Ailments (Like Allergies)
Being sick in the Foundation Faith of God was not fun. Especially when it was an ongoing anxiety about sleeping. I mean, think about it. Who do you tell when you haven't slept well? Your spouse? Your parent? Your coworker or siblings? I didn't have any of that. We were all just trying to make it...
-
Episode 28: What Was Our Religion, Anyway?
You'd think that a cult would have a single, controlling doctrine that informed every moment and every action in the lives of its adherents, wouldn't you? Something like this world is an illusion, so everything we do is an attempt to break the illusion. Or our existence is a simulation. Or…
more -
Episode 27: Post Cult Story 1 - Painfully Shy
Part of my growing up in a cult has actually been the growing up I've done outside of the cult. This is a story about good, friendly, generous people helping me find my feet, find my voice a little, and also start finding myself. Because when I got out of that cult, I was in a thick, shy shell.…
more -
Episode 26: Random Double Standards
Let's get into some of the intricacies of the day-to-day of cult/commune living. In this episode, I share some of the bizarre, sometimes alienating double standards propagated by the Foundation and its members. Things to do with sex, the terrible outside world, and more. Tune in and remember to...
-
Episode 25: I Will Not Be Erased
I'm usually down with just telling my stories and being as chill as possible. But several things combined to make this episode necessary. And talking about being essentially erased over and over again by the people who 'raised' me was necessary- because voices will be heard. I will be heard.…
more -
Episode 24: Okay, I Had A Crush
For the final episode of Season 1, a lengthy story about a major crush I had. Yes, a crush. On a Scottish girl. The years that I carried this torch became incredibly formative for me and I'm grateful for all I learned and all I did to improve myself. The last little bit of the episode is a...
-
Episode 23: A Hippie With A Temper Part 2
It's part two of the short series about my mother. Our relationship, as I tried to describe in the last episode, was odd at best. We ate Chinese food sometimes. We both read horror novels. We spoke sometimes. But when I shared my honest feelings, it made her angry, so I learned to not do that.…
more -
Episode 22: A Hippie With a Temper Part 1
Now for two episodes about my mother. There's a lot of me doing my level best to get across the experience/relationship I had with my mother- which wasn't all bad, but was not what most people would understand. So listen and you'll probably get a new appreciation for your own parents ( I really...
-
Episode 21: Water Activities
I love water today. I was scared of it when I was younger. Here's where I tell you why and take the opportunity to share some specific stories about how we commune kids spent our days. The YWCA in Dallas features prominently, as does weird, ritualistic baptism. Remember to review!
-
Episode 20: Faith School
"I'm an equal-opportunity weirdo." Ah, the joys of an unscripted podcast. In this milestone 20th episode, I share lots of details about the school I spent seven years attending. The one created by the cult because of... reasons I can only really speculate about. In many ways, it was awesome. In a...
-
Episode 19: No Idea How To Mourn
This is a slightly longer episode, as the subject matter merits a bit more time. Plus, I had a question submitted that deserved a good answer. This episode is where I share one of the most important events of my childhood and, frankly, how I screwed it up. It's related to my oldest brother's…
more -
Episode 18: Dogs and Cats Living Together
Mass hysteria! Okay, it wasn't exactly mass hysteria, but being raised by people whose primary focus and goal in life were to rescue animals meant that I was surrounded by furry critters all the time. It wasn't always great. It wasn't always terrible. Listen to learn who the greatest cat ever was.
-
Episode 17: A Corner, 5000 Lines, and All Points in Between
It's a long, long description for an episode about the colorful, sometimes terrible and cruel, and sometimes just bizarre punishments that we received in the cult. I quote Ursula from The Little Mermaid because that's always a good idea. Remember to review and share!
-
Episode 16: I Had A Big Problem - Part 3
The final part of the three-part series on the problem of my temper and the temper of others. I knew my temper was causing problems. I knew I wanted to change that and do better. BE better. Here's the story of how I found healing, strength, and progress in my goal to overcome my temper. Remember…
more -
Episode 15: I Had A Big Problem - Part 2
Last time we talked about my big problem: a temper. However, we talked a lot more about someone else's temper than mine and what happened to me when he lost it. In this episode, we talk about how my temper was terrible and one day I lost it badly - and how that was a turning point for me.…
more -
Episode 14: I Had A Big Problem - Part 1
Today we get personal. Actually, today and next week, and possibly the following week. This is a multi-episode story about my temper problem. I'm not just talking about my own temper either. Listen in and remember to tell your friends to check out my podcast. I'd love it if you would support the...
-
Episode 13: The Problem of Parents
So glad you're back for more! Here I talk about what many of us cult kids talked a lot about: parents. We were raised as if parents were not needed, although that experience varied due to prestige of one's actual parents. Many of us were lied to about at least one parent. Why? Good question. A…
more -
Episode 12: I Have Skills
Hey Cult Insider! Was the cult all bad? No, friends, it was not. I gained a lot from growing up the way I did. Let's talk about bikes, cars, cockroaches, and woodwork. But mostly cockroaches. Remember! Please share and review. You can help me turn my podcasting into a speaking career!
-
Episode 11: Dogs, Their Poo, and Me
I promise this episode isn't gross. You'll laugh, not cringe. I answer some questions about smells and other cults, then I tell the story of scooping large amounts of dog poop and how that was actually a good thing. You'll have to listen if you want to find out how much dog crap I scooped in my...
-
Episode 10: Miles of Trenches
The Process/Foundation/Best Friends bought a giant ranch just north of Kanab, Utah. There was much work to be done and who better to do a large part of it than a bunch of young, sort of fit youths who couldn't say no? Here's where I tell some of those stories, answer some questions, and get a bit...
Topics in this show
About this show
Here is a podcast where I tell stories about growing up in a fairly well-known cult. Starting as the Process Church of the Final Judgement in the UK and morphing into the Foundation Faith of God in the US - it was controversial in many ways. It evolved over the years and now has no religion, functioning solely as Best Friends Animal Society. There's much that hasn't been told about 30+ kids that were 'raised' in this cult. Cult orphans is a fair way to describe us. These are stories of my growing up in this cult along with lessons learned and some episodes with my sister. Please support!
Hosted by
Jared Garrett
Categories