PODCAST · leisure
TBTL: Too Beautiful To Live
by TBTL
TBTL is a daily show hosted by two longtime friends goofing their way through the world the best they can. Join Luke Burbank and Andrew Walsh as they cover the most important topics of the day, from 25 year-old film reviews to whether or not Andrew's neighbors are secretly using his garbage bins.
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1000
#4727 Hacky Sack Is Backy Sack
A sad story of a lost cat in Andrew's neighborhood has one dazzling detail that offers a sliver of delight. Plus, Luke and Andrew are very excited to hear that the youth of today are getting into hacky sack again! And Luke thinks today is the day someone named Josh is really going to buy his lawnmower.
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999
#4726 None Of My Beaux-ness
Luke and Andrew come into the show feeling a little itchy, but they spin that energy into podcast gold. Luke has an update on his electric lawnmower situation, Andrew explains why he's feeling a little nervous about an event this summer, and listener Tracy shares an inspirational story about facing her own fears bravely.
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998
#4725 Mower Money, Mower Problems
Luke had a somewhat unfortunate realization about his lawn mower situation this morning. He and Andrew also discuss a class-action lawsuit against the company that is buying up bowling alleys and turning them into overly expensive hipster bars.
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997
#4724 Moderate To Severe Self Confidence
Luke had an amazing birthday weekend that he is still recovering from, but Andrew wants to instead talk about his lunch on Saturday. They also get a TBTL Junior Sluggers update from Coach Ben, and a listener tries to tell the difference between modern art and a sleeping man.
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996
#4723 Three Conferences Outside Ebbing, Missouri
Something happened to Luke during his 5K fun run yesterday that forced him to make a very important split-second decision. He and Andrew also discuss the "Blue Dot Fever" that is causing huge pop stars to cancel their summer tours. And Andrew's attempts to make elevator small talk crash and burn.
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995
#4722 Where The Sideburn Ends
An update from Coach Ben about the TBTL Junior Sluggers leads to a conversation about stirrup socks and laundry etiquette. Luke offers an impromptu review of the Sam Rockwell time travel movie Good Luck, Have Fun, Don't Die. And a TBTL Ten gets a new job that is very relevant to Andrew's interests.
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994
#4721 Honk If You're Corny
Luke just landed in Boston after a long flight, and he's already getting ready to turn around and fly back home. Plus, Andrew explains a huge revelation he recently learned about "Honk If…" bumper stickers. And they pick up some interesting Roblox facts via a Tiktok video about infidelity.
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993
#4720 Grape-Nuts Bat Last
Luke and Andrew reminisce about being young and broke. They also discuss Luke's chastity watch (and what happened when he lost it), and why Red Lobster is playing a dangerous game by bringing back its Endless Shrimp promotion.
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992
#4719 Calendar Boy
Luke undertook a mechanical project yesterday and is still unsure if it was a good idea. Andrew had the perfect Saturday, until he didn't. And Andrew explains how the imaginary voices of listeners helped him solve a long-standing problem in his bathroom.
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991
#4718 The Dixie Dingus
Andrew went to his first Puppy Kindergarten class with Lucy and got a very big surprise! Plus, Genevieve got Lucy's DNA results back, so now we know what kind of dog(s) she is. And Luke is obsessed with a new short form show that has an ingeniously simple premise.
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990
#4717 Pussyfooting: The Industry Of Laziness
Luke unlocked a new fear on his flight down to L.A. It involved someone else's bladder. He and Andrew also discuss the state of Washington's lawsuit over "Buy One, Get One Free" pricing schemes. And a listener from Queens tells an amazing tale of a neighborhood spat with "an O. Henry ending."
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989
#4716 A Man Of A Certain Gravy
Luke and Andrew receive a curious piece of mail that ends up sending them down a salty, slippery memory lane. They also check the voicemail line to find stories of lost phones, perfect days, and -- of course -- filets of fish.
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988
#4715 KUMON Eileen
Luke found himself in his car, in the middle of the woods, without cell service, when he went out for a simple errand this morning. It took him four hours to get home. He and Andrew also dissect the playlist that a sports reporter allegedly made for her illicit paramour. And they discuss -- without spoilers -- the brilliance of DTF: St. Louis.
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987
#4714 Calling All Carbs
Luke helped Becca prep for her marathon this weekend by sharing his own expertise -- not running expertise so much as carb-loading know-how. Plus, the TBTL Junior Sluggers had a great weekend, as did TBTL's other rooting sports interests. And listener Ethan comes through with some important night court information as Andrew still awaits his jury duty fate.
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986
#4713 I Love It When You Call Me Big Puppy
Luke and Andrew mourn the abrupt closure of SBK, a Seattle karaoke joint that played a huge part in their late night marauding back in the day. Plus, Lucy the Puppy has completely changed Andrew's sleep schedule as well as his attitude about certain things -- but not Twisted Tea.
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985
#4712 Three Doors Up
Andrew stumbles upon a truly, truly disturbing photo while looking for something during today's podcast. He tries to edit it for Luke, but he only makes things worse. Meanwhile, Luke is amazed by the cost cutting measures of a new NBA owner known as "El Cheapo" -- and the fact that the league commissioner is defending the bozo. And Lucy The Puppy had a big day at Lowe's yesterday.
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984
#4711 Fade Into Luke
Luke and Andrew examine the case of three men who tried to pull insurance fraud by dressing up like a bear and destroying a car. They also discuss Luke's personal relationship with Jiminy Glick and some big news regarding his status as an Albanian-American.
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983
#4710 Roku Ruesday
Andrew goes too far in trying to help Luke with his Roku settings. Plus, Luke finds himself down a rabbit hole of music and artificial intelligence after a parachute stunt goes awry at a Virginia Tech football game.
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982
#4709 411 Is A Joke
Andrew got into a big fight this weekend…with his car. Meanwhile, Luke's attempts to meet his new neighbors are thwarted by impatient Jeep drivers. The Seattle Times FINALLY investigates the curbside garbage scam that Andrew has been telling everyone about for years. And the TBTL Merch Store has a new offering!
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981
#4708 Train Drops
Andrew gives Luke an audio-based quiz that is both perfect and completely imperfect for TBTL. It involves train sounds. They also discuss the story of the musician whose event was cancelled because he used A.I. to make his latest album.
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980
#4707 Can't Find A Bedder Cup
Luke and Andrew are in bad shape after a terrible night of Mariners baseball -- and that's just referring to their branding gimmicks. Luke has several mug-related emergencies during the show, while Andrew does everything in his power to tank the podcast with audio misfires. Meanwhile, the tennis shoe company AllBirds is transitioning into a…whatnow?
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979
#4706 What Does Thunder Look Like?
We have now heard from almost everyone involved in the Chappel Roan security guard controversy, and everyone seems surprisingly reasonable. Plus, Luke is digging the Justin Bieber's music at recent performance at Coachella, and Andrew makes a fool of himself with a local reporter. And a listener brings some FACTS when it comes to "the sound of lightning."
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978
#4705 This Is Not The Fifty Pounds You're Looking For
Luke's frustrating saga trying to return a set of dishes has him reconsidering his shopping style. Andrew is excited to bring some "Celebrity Birthday Segment" energy to TBTL. And former NYC Mayor / fraudster Eric Adams is trying to bump Luke lower down the list of famous Albanian-Americans.
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977
#4704 Statue Of Limitations
The Mariners finally unveiled a statue honoring Ichiro Suzuki on Friday, but the big reveal didn't go exactly as planned… We also get updates on the TBTL Junior Jalapenos and puppy/kitty relations in Andrew's house.
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976
#4703 Lucy's Third Movement
A Seattle judge has lost his judging privileges after forging a fake document to get a parking discount, and Luke and Andrew have a Freaky Friday-esque reaction to it. Plus, Andrew has an update on day two of puppy training.
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975
#4702 Byron Now, Pay Later
Andrew brought home a puppy yesterday and has all the details about her first night with him and Genevieve. Plus, CBS has announced its programming lineup that will replace Stephen Colbert, and Luke is not impressed, to say the least.
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974
#4701 Tacos Cuerdos
Luke got to experience one of his favorite Tiktok videos in real life last night after attending a jazz show. Andrew is excited to pick up his new puppy this afternoon! And a listener has questions after observing a jogger's odd behavior.
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973
#4700 Espresso Yourself
Andrew got a postcard in the mail yesterday that he was not happy to receive. Luke is in Los Angeles, where he's worried about the billboard economy. And they discuss a fascinating Seattle Times article profiling a long-standing business that has always piqued their interest. (And, it turns out, Luke's dad is a customer!)
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972
#4699 The TBTL Junior ROIs
Australia officially has officially enshrined the famous "succulent Chinese meal" audio that went viral after decades of being lost. Luke and Andrew also receive a poetic update on the TBTL Junior Slugger's first little league game of the season!
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971
#4698 The Dog Days Of April
Andrew visited a house full of foster puppies yesterday and has a full report. Plus, Genevieve had her court hearing today regarding a ticket she received while chasing down her lost phone. She joins the show to let us know how it turned out. And the TBTL Junior Sluggers have a new name, a new logo, and a lot of pizazz! We get the latest as they gear up for their first game this weekend.
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970
#4697 To A Hammer, Everything Is A TAC
Luke and Andrew discuss the Seattle airport's misguided and expensive efforts to rebrand. They also watch the video of a Texas judge bullying an IT worker who's just trying to help him out.
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969
#4696 Making A Parkerer
Luke finally heard from the court about the erroneous parking ticket he received. He's somewhat satisfied with the results. He and Andrew also discuss the end of the A.I. app called Sora, which could let anyone make convincing deep fakes depicting real people. And, speaking of robots, Luke is ready for them to fully take over at least one aspect of Major League Baseball.
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968
#4695 A Few Small Dogs
Luke pays homage to John Hinterberger, a Seattle writer he grew up reading and who represents a more adventurous era of newspaper publishing. Meanwhile, Andrew and Genevieve had their first appointment with a dog rescue organization yesterday. While Andrew is ready to take the process slowly, Luke has other ideas for him.
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967
#4694 Let Chappell Roam!
Andrew is back from Hawaii, where he had a wonderful time but a wistful goodbye. Luke gets him up to speed on the latest Chappell Roan controversy. Luke also discusses his experience at the "No Kings" rally this weekend in Portland. And they look back on their epic TBTL boat trip from 11 years ago.
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966
#4693 Not So Grand Opening
Luke gets into it with the people sitting next to him at Opening Night, but Becca has his back, plus David From the Basement stops by to explain why Stephen Colbert is writing the next Lord of the Rings film.
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965
#4692 If I Had A Ninnyhammer
Luke and Andrew dive into some listener voicemails, including one involving an angry Russian widow and another that leaves Andrew bumfuzzled.
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964
#4691 This Could Have Been A Greeting
Luke has a big issue with an office place tradition. Andrew turns to his enemy, AI, to see if it has any solutions. They also discuss the now-solved mystery of the British man who turned blue overnight.
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963
#4690 Let The Botulism Hit The Floor
Luke had a bad experience with a can of Coke yesterday and now wants a moratorium on new soda flavors. Plus, an anonymous listener provides the definitive "How bad do you have to poop?' scale.
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962
#4689 Swinging On A Star
With Andrew out of town, Luke is joined by TBTL Employee Numero Uno, Jon Sklaroff. Jon provides an update on life with a new puppy and the two discuss why the NBA is actually good and Seattle should be excited to see the Sonics come back. And Luke details a foolproof plan to get the goods at Blockbuster.
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961
#4688 I'm Not The Scrub Daddy, I'm The Daddy Who Scrubbed Up
Luke and Andrew are feeling giddy on the first day of Spring! Luke is breaking out a fresh Sponge Mommy for the occasion, and Andrew is preparing for a real Shandy Summer. They also get the fascinating background of the famous "Did You Ever Have A Dream" viral video.
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960
#4687 Lemon Law
Luke and Andrew discuss AfroMan's recent court victory against the cops who were suing him for defamation. It's a complicated win. Luke also reveals his skill for knowing whether or not a fast food restaurant sells Coke or Pepsi products.
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959
#4686 Doodle, Where's My Car
An article about Doodles peaked Luke's attention AND taught him his new favorite word. Plus, Coach Ben unveils the lineup for the new season of TBTL Junior Sluggers baseball!
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958
#4685 Get On Borg!
Luke introduces Andrew to the newest, hottest St. Patrick's day ritual, which involves milk jugs filled with green booze. Plus, Andrew is trying to figure out what to do after a cyclone caused massive damage to the Hawaiian town he's planning on visiting next week. Photo via "Chicago Bars".
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957
#4684 Hungry, Hungry Hypnos
Luke's mom, Susie, joins the show to talk cybersecurity, old Kingdome food vendors, and what happens when you "take your tongue on a sleigh ride." Plus, Luke saw a "hyprov" show this weekend, which combines hypnosis and Improv. And he and Andrew discuss Matthew Berry's appearance with Conan O'Brien at the Oscars last night.
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956
#4683 Friggatriskaidekaphobia
Luke says he wants to start golfing more this summer, which of course leads to a long conversation about all of Andrew's childhood vehicles -- including a personal golf cart. They also discuss the snow that's falling in Seattle on a very special Friday The 13th.
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955
#4682 Ozark Is The Bluest Color
Luke honed his DJ skills at an art show yesterday, while Andrew was at home making the worst meal of his life. Luke's also been very much enjoying the new Stephen Conrad show, DTF: St. Louis.
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954
#4681 Houston, We Have A Pro Bono!
Luke's favorite ambient noise may be giving him bad dreams. But the really weird thing is that Andrew's been having the SAME bad dreams. Also, a hump-inflating scandal is rattling the world of camel pageants, and the story of two baseball players not shaking hands has led to more drama than expected. And Andrew, with the help of an eagle-eyed listener, is celebrating a very special anniversary today.
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953
#4680 Bottle Episode
Luke had a scary moment this morning while trying to clean his water bottles, but he caught it all on tape. Andrew learns that his once-nemesis is a huge deal on Bluesky. And they discuss the World Baseball Classic and why Andrew is rooting for Team Mexico.
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952
#4679 O'Hare Of The Dog
Luke spent the weekend trying to escape O'Hare airport, while Andrew spent the weekend trying to escape from an evil magician's dressing room. Plus, Luke is mad at A.I. for lying on his behalf, and an overseas listener takes us on an audio journey.
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951
#4678 You Give Me Femur
Genevieve joins the show to discuss her court plans after she learns she was ticketed during Operation Bus Chase. She also explains why she's so angry about her astrological sign, even though she doesn't believe in that stuff. Meanwhile, Luke is vibing off of Detlef Schrempf's Instagram feed, and Andrew learns he might be Baz To The Bone.
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ABOUT THIS SHOW
TBTL is a daily show hosted by two longtime friends goofing their way through the world the best they can. Join Luke Burbank and Andrew Walsh as they cover the most important topics of the day, from 25 year-old film reviews to whether or not Andrew's neighbors are secretly using his garbage bins.
HOSTED BY
TBTL
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