PODCAST · leisure
The Bear Table
by Necrotic Clock Productions
A podcast where three queer nerds play Dungeons and Dragons and other tabletop games. The Bear Table is a Necrotic Clock Production.
Episodes
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Syzygy 039 - The Capybara Caper
In which character lore is omitted due to low rolls, an old man gets the shit kicked out of him, and a prisoner is set free. Max Jackson (he/him) - Kodak Steelhammer - dwarf/orc protection fighter (he/him) Amber Griffin (she/her) - Guin of Stone Henge - earth genasi elemental monk (she/her) RJ...
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Syzygy 038 - “Ma’am, your son is a homosexual.”
In which- you know what, I’m tired of writing these. Stuff happens, listen to the episode. Max Jackson (he/him) - Kodak Steelhammer - dwarf/orc protection fighter (he/him) Amber Griffin (she/her) - Guin of Stone Henge - earth genasi elemental monk (she/her) RJ Mrakota (they/them) - Nikephoros...
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Syzygy 037 - A Meditation on the Concept of Crabs
In which a mansion is re-repaired, a journey is re-embarked upon, and a family is found(?). Max Jackson (he/him) - Kodak Steelhammer - dwarf/orc protection fighter (he/him) Amber Griffin (she/her) - Guin of Stone Henge - earth genasi elemental monk (she/her) RJ Mrakota (they/them) - Nikephoros...
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Syzygy 036 - The World’s Best Plan
In which the rules are more like suggestions. Max Jackson (he/him) - Kodak Steelhammer - dwarf/orc protection fighter (he/him) Amber Griffin (she/her) - Guin of Stone Henge - earth genasi elemental monk (she/her) RJ Mrakota (they/them) - Nikephoros Teskos - minotaur swashbuckler rogue (he/him)…
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Syzygy 035 - Four Dabloons
Apologies for our extended absence, there were Circumstances (gay ones). Max Jackson (he/him) - Kodak Steelhammer - dwarf/orc protection fighter (he/him) Amber Griffin (she/her) - Guin of Stone Henge - earth genasi elemental monk (she/her) RJ Mrakota (they/them) - Nikephoros Teskos - minotaur...
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Bloopers 004 - The Meat Obelisk
THE MEAT OBELISK IS LARGE AND UNHOLY Max Jackson (he/him) - Kodak Steelhammer - dwarf/orc protection fighter (he/him) Amber Griffin (she/her) - Guin of Stone Henge - earth genasi elemental monk (she/her) RJ Mrakota (they/them) - Nikephoros Teskos - minotaur swashbuckler rogue (he/him) Nico…
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Syzygy 034 - Oskr, JoBob, and Felecia
In which a tree is bothered, potential allies are ignored, and Lady Mittens takes a short trip to the Goo Realm. Max Jackson (he/him) - Kodak Steelhammer - dwarf/orc protection fighter (he/him) Amber Griffin (she/her) - Guin of Stone Henge - earth genasi elemental monk (she/her) RJ Mrakota...
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Syzygy 033 - Nike Rages!?
In which a surrender is negotiated, and then another, weirder, surrender is negotiated. Max Jackson (he/him) - Kodak Steelhammer - dwarf/orc protection fighter (he/him) Amber Griffin (she/her) - Guin of Stone Henge - earth genasi elemental monk (she/her) RJ Mrakota (they/them) - Nikephoros Teskos…
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Syzygy 032 - Whac-A-Mole
In which a sand castle is built, a sea battle is fought, and hydras turn out to be cuter than we ever thought possible… Max Jackson (he/him) - Kodak Steelhammer - dwarf/orc protection fighter (he/him) Amber Griffin (she/her) - Guin of Stone Henge - earth genasi elemental monk (she/her) RJ Mrakota...
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Syzygy 031 - We’re Going to War
Nike plans a war. Guin fucks with Nike. Lady Mittens fucks with Guin. Max Jackson (he/him) - Kodak Steelhammer - dwarf/orc protection fighter (he/him) Amber Griffin (she/her) - Guin of Stone Henge - earth genasi elemental monk (she/her) RJ Mrakota (they/them) - Nikephoros Teskos - minotaur...
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Shots 005 - The Ghost of Gault Gisney
For legal reasons, this entire episode happens in Minecraft. Max Jackson - GM RJ Mrakota (they/them) - Cecily Tiptin Amber Griffin (she/her) - Gail Godfrey Sean Hogan https://www.youtube.com/channel/UC1Fz5YWpwDUV66YLURRQp3w
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Syzygy 030 - “As your therapist…”
In which a contract is signed, a one-sided conversation is had, and a crew’s fate is sealed… Max Jackson (he/him) - Kodak Steelhammer - dwarf/orc protection fighter (he/him) Amber Griffin (she/her) - Guin of Stone Henge - earth genasi elemental monk (she/her) RJ Mrakota (they/them) - Nikephoros...
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Syzygy 029 - Nonlethally
In which we do! not! kill! anyone! Max Jackson (he/him) - Kodak Steelhammer - dwarf/orc protection fighter (he/him) Amber Griffin (she/her) - Guin of Stone Henge - earth genasi elemental monk (she/her) RJ Mrakota (they/them) - Nikephoros Teskos - minotaur swashbuckler rogue (he/him) Sean Hogan...
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Bloopers 003 - Egg
In which the audio quality varies wildly. Max Jackson (he/him) - Kodak Steelhammer - dwarf/orc protection fighter (he/him) Amber Griffin (she/her) - Guin of Stone Henge - earth genasi elemental monk (she/her) RJ Mrakota (they/them) - Nikephoros Teskos - minotaur swashbuckler rogue (he/him) Sean...
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Syzygy 028 - Lavender and Pink
In which some very bad things happen!!! (And also the audio is slightly messed up, idk why. A few words get inexplicably dropped) Max Jackson (he/him) - Kodak Steelhammer - dwarf/orc protection fighter (he/him) Amber Griffin (she/her) - Guin of Stone Henge - earth genasi elemental monk (she/her)…
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Syzygy 027 - A Trip to the Library
In which we go on a knowledge quest, wrestle tongues, and ‘pass the test’. Max Jackson (he/him) - Kodak Steelhammer - dwarf/orc protection fighter (he/him) Amber Griffin (she/her) - Guin of Stone Henge - earth genasi elemental monk (she/her) RJ Mrakota (they/them) - Nikephoros Teskos - minotaur...
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Syzygy 026 - Going to Jail
In which we learn about family, uncover a tragic factoid, and find a lead. Max Jackson (he/him) - Kodak Steelhammer - dwarf/orc protection fighter (he/him) Amber Griffin (she/her) - Guin of Stone Henge - earth genasi elemental monk (she/her) RJ Mrakota (they/them) - Nikephoros Teskos - minotaur...
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Syzygy 025 - Safety Dance
This episode includes a special guest! Max Jackson (he/him) - Kodak Steelhammer - dwarf/orc protection fighter (he/him) Amber Griffin (she/her) - Guin of Stone Henge - earth genasi elemental monk (she/her) RJ Mrakota (they/them) - Nikephoros Teskos - minotaur swashbuckler rogue (he/him) Nico...
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Syzygy 024 - Assassin’s Creeding
Parkour! Max Jackson (he/him) - Kodak Steelhammer - dwarf/orc protection fighter (he/him) Amber Griffin (she/her) - Guin of Stone Henge - earth genasi elemental monk (she/her) RJ Mrakota (they/them) - Nikephoros Teskos - minotaur swashbuckler rogue (he/him) Sean Hogan...
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Bloopers 002 - Another One Bites the Moon Sand™
In which we lose our trains of thought, are very bad at math, and play with the sand. Max Jackson (he/him) - Kodak Steelhammer - dwarf/orc protection fighter (he/him) Amber Griffin (she/her) - Guin of Stone Henge - earth genasi elemental monk (she/her) RJ Mrakota (they/them) - Nikephoros Teskos -...
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Shots 004 - Sausage Man
In which Amber does a lot of weird voices while inebriated. (Skip to 16 minutes to jump over character creation.) RJ Mrakota (they/them) - Potato Max Jackson (he/him) - Tchotchke Amber Griffin (she/her) - GM Sean Hogan https://www.youtube.com/channel/UC1Fz5YWpwDUV66YLURRQp3w
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Syzygy 023 - The Engreebling
In which some goods are peddled, and some become extremely engreebled. Max Jackson (he/him) - Kodak Steelhammer - dwarf/orc protection fighter (he/him) Amber Griffin (she/her) - Guin of Stone Henge - earth genasi elemental monk (she/her) RJ Mrakota (they/them) - Nikephoros Teskos - minotaur...
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Syzygy 022 - Fishy Business
In which some locals are met, and some asses are bitten by fish. Max Jackson (he/him) - Kodak Steelhammer - dwarf/orc protection fighter (he/him) Amber Griffin (she/her) - Guin of Stone Henge - earth genasi elemental monk (she/her) RJ Mrakota (they/them) - Nikephoros Teskos - minotaur…
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Syzygy 021 - Penelope Painting
In which another person is dead, a murderer is chased, and existential questions are asked. Max Jackson (he/him) - Kodak Steelhammer - dwarf/orc protection fighter (he/him) Amber Griffin (she/her) - Guin of Stone Henge - earth genasi elemental monk (she/her) RJ Mrakota (they/them) - Nikephoros...
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Shots 003 - That Way's North
In which the episode is not a prank this time. Happy birthday, Max! (Start at 4:00 if you listened to the last ep lmao) Amber Griffin (she/her) RJ Mrakota (they/them) Max Jackson (he/him) Sean Hogan https://www.youtube.com/channel/UC1Fz5YWpwDUV66YLURRQp3
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Shots 003 - There's Been a Murder
A SUPER-special episode for Max’s birthday! (I’m making good on my word >:D) Amber Griffin (she/her) RJ Mrakota (they/them) Max Jackson (he/him) Sean Hogan https://www.youtube.com/channel/UC1Fz5YWpwDUV66YLURRQp3w
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Syzygy 020 - Truth Hurts
In which everyone drinks unknown substances. Max Jackson (he/him) - Kodak Steelhammer - dwarf/orc protection fighter (he/him) Amber Griffin (she/her) - Guin of Stone Henge - earth genasi elemental monk (she/her) RJ Mrakota (they/them) - Nikephoros Teskos - minotaur swashbuckler rogue (he/him)…
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Syzygy 019 - Bad Hair Day, Bad Alibis
In which a man is dead, and absolutely everyone is suspicious. Max Jackson (he/him) - Kodak Steelhammer - dwarf/orc protection fighter (he/him) Amber Griffin (she/her) - Guin of Stone Henge - earth genasi elemental monk (she/her) RJ Mrakota (they/them) - Nikephoros Teskos - minotaur swashbuckler...
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Syzygy 018 - BEAR Titties
In which a bear is wrangled, a midnight adventure is had, and the inevitable comes to pass. Max Jackson (he/him) - Kodak Steelhammer - dwarf/orc protection fighter (he/him) Amber Griffin (she/her) - Guin of Stone Henge - earth genasi elemental monk (she/her) RJ Mrakota (they/them) - Nikephoros...
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Shots 002 - Age is Just a Number
It’s RJ’s birthday! Continuing our tradition, we get drunk and play RJ’s game of choice: Grandma Club. Our episodes ARE usually this chaotic in the first draft, I usually just cut most of the bullshit out. Not so this time. You’re welcome, <3 Amber. Max Jackson (he/him) - GM RJ Mrakota…
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Syzygy 017 - Tits Out Into the Woods
In which the party goes to a nice dinner and fucking ruins it for absolutely everyone. Max Jackson (he/him) - Kodak Steelhammer - dwarf/orc protection fighter (he/him) Amber Griffin (she/her) - Guin of Stone Henge - earth genasi elemental monk (she/her) RJ Mrakota (they/them) - Nikephoros Teskos…
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Syzygy 016 - ‘I Suplexed a Bear’
A wagon is escaped, togas are worn, and a bear is suplexed. Apologies for the lateness of this one, Amber had to do a minor surgery and it really fucked her up for a bit! Max Jackson (he/him) - Kodak Steelhammer - dwarf/orc protection fighter (he/him) Amber Griffin (she/her) - Guin of Stone Henge…
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Shots 001 - We Can Do Drugs About This
Shots 001 - We Can Do Drugs About This It’s Amber’s birthday, so she forces Max & RJ to play the Warrior Cats Adventure Game with her by bribing them with stolen booze. It goes about how you’d expect. Amber Griffin (she/her) - GM RJ Mrakota (they/them) - Fireball Max Jackson (he/him) - Shitface...
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Syzygy 015 - Bigger Fish to Fry
An ancient civilization is rediscovered, sick flips are made, and we learn what it’s like to be small. Max Jackson (he/him) - Kodak Steelhammer - dwarf/orc protection fighter (he/him) Amber Griffin (she/her) - Guin of Stone Henge - earth genasi elemental monk (she/her) RJ Mrakota (they/them) -...
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Syzygy 014 - 'Gary, I love you.'
In which Gary is the best. Max Jackson (he/him) - Kodak Steelhammer - dwarf/orc protection fighter (he/him) Amber Griffin (she/her) - Guin of Stone Henge - earth genasi elemental monk (she/her) RJ Mrakota (they/them) - Nikephoros Teskos - minotaur swashbuckler rogue (he/him) Sean Hogan...
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Syzygy 013 - Oops.
Ah, unlucky episode thirteen. We fucked up. Max Jackson (he/him) - Kodak Steelhammer - dwarf/orc protection fighter (he/him) Amber Griffin (she/her) - Guin of Stone Henge - earth genasi elemental monk (she/her) RJ Mrakota (they/them) - Nikephoros Teskos - minotaur swashbuckler rogue (he/him) Sean...
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Syzygy 012 - The Orphan Farm
In which a makeover is had, grumps grump, and bribery is sometimes okay. Max Jackson (he/him) - Kodak Steelhammer - dwarf/orc protection fighter (he/him) Amber Griffin (she/her) - Guin of Stone Henge - earth genasi elemental monk (she/her) RJ Mrakota (they/them) - Nikephoros Teskos - minotaur...
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Syzygy 011 - The Beach Episode
In which carnival food is eaten, carnival games are played, and Nike gets a grenade. (Reupload due to editing errors in the previous upload, 08/01/2021) Max Jackson (he/him) - Kodak Steelhammer - dwarf/orc protection fighter (he/him) Amber Griffin (she/her) - Guin of Stone Henge - earth genasi...
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Syzygy 010 - THE COCOON
In which trauma is relived, a good long nap is had, and Guin is nice to someone… in her own way. WE’RE BACK! All vaxxed up, and once again recording in Amber’s basement. Max Jackson (he/him) - Kodak Steelhammer - dwarf/orc protection fighter (he/him) Amber Griffin (she/her) - Guin of Stone Henge…
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Bloopers 001 - The Ceremonial Unplugging of the Carbon Monoxide Detector
Hey there! We ran out of buffer (who would’ve thought that there would be a pandemic that would eat up SIX MONTHS of audio… ha… ha…), so this is it until we can get new audio equipment for remote recordings. Thanks for sticking with us! Max Jackson (he/him) - Kodak Steelhammer - dwarf/orc...
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Syzygy 009 - The Vast Cavity
In which (mostly rock-based) pranks are pulled, a migraine is suffered through, and The Vast Cavity is penetrated. Max Jackson (he/him) - Kodak Steelhammer - dwarf/orc protection fighter (he/him) Amber Griffin (she/her) - Guin of Stone Henge - earth genasi elemental monk (she/her) RJ Mrakota...
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Syzygy 008 - ‘Guys… Are We the Bad Guys?’
In which the assholes continue to be assholes (on both sides). Max Jackson (he/him) - Kodak Steelhammer - dwarf/orc protection fighter (he/him) Amber Griffin (she/her) - Guin of Stone Henge - earth genasi elemental monk (she/her) RJ Mrakota (they/them) - Nikephoros Teskos - minotaur swashbuckler...
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Syzygy 007 - Old Friends, Old Enemies
In which a friendship is reborn, cool artifacts are observed, and +1 privileges are flagrantly abused. Max Jackson (he/him) - Kodak Steelhammer - dwarf/orc protection fighter (he/him) Amber Griffin (she/her) - Guin of Stone Henge - earth genasi elemental monk (she/her) RJ Mrakota (they/them) -...
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Sysygy 006 - Under the Sea
In which a very short battle is fought, an ancient evil is uncovered, and a love affair is revealed. Max Jackson (he/him) - Kodak Steelhammer - dwarf/orc protection fighter (he/him) Amber Griffin (she/her) - Guin of Stone Henge - earth genasi elemental monk (she/her) RJ Mrakota (they/them) -...
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Sysygy 005 - Nike's Huge 'Charisma Modifier'
In which seas are sailed, dice are rolled, and some things happen behind closed doors… ;) Max Jackson (he/him) - Kodak Steelhammer - dwarf/orc protection fighter (he/him) Amber Griffin (she/her) - Guin of Stone Henge - earth genasi elemental monk (she/her) RJ Mrakota (they/them) - Nikephoros…
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Syzygy 004 - The Legendary Whistle of ‘Ow.’
In which traps are fallen into, treasures are found, and many rooms are entered and left. Max Jackson (he/him) - Kodak Steelhammer - dwarf/orc protection fighter (he/him) Amber Griffin (she/her) - Guin of Stone Henge - earth genasi elemental monk (she/her) RJ Mrakota (they/them) - Nikephoros…
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Syzygy 003 - FOUR FOUR FOUR
fourfourfourfourfourfourfourfourfourfourfourfourfourfourfourfourfourfourfourfourfourfourfourfourfourfourfourfourfourfourfourfourfourfourfourfourfourfourfourfourfourfourfourfourfourfourfourfourfourfourfourfourfourfourfourfourfourfourfourfourfourfourfourfourfourfourfourfourfourfourfourfourfourfourfour…
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Game Night 001 - For the Quil
We take a break from the action to play For the Queen! In which dastardly plots are foiled, murders are committed, and very ironic allergies are suffered through. Note: This episode was recorded in early 2019, For the Queen is now available in physical form on the Evil Hat website!...
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Syzygy 002 - Goblins, Zombies, and Bugbears, Oh My!
Goblins, Zombies, and Bugbears, Oh My! In which needless fights are had, things that should not be licked are licked, and an 8,000:1 mistake is made. Max Jackson (he/him) - Kodak Steelhammer - dwarf/orc protection fighter (he/him) Amber Griffin (she/her) - Guin of Stone Henge - earth genasi...
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Syzygy 001 - Please Don't 'Captain America' My Ass
Our very first episode, in which pants are not worn, the fuck words are said, and we get many (many!) rules wrong! Max Jackson (he/him) - Kodak Steelhammer - dwarf/orc protection fighter (he/him) Amber Griffin (she/her) - Guin of Stone Henge - earth genasi elemental monk (she/her) RJ Mrakota...
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Frequently Asked Questions
How many episodes does The Bear Table have?
The Bear Table currently has 50 episodes available on PodParley. New episodes are automatically indexed when they're published to the podcast feed.
What is The Bear Table about?
A podcast where three queer nerds play Dungeons and Dragons and other tabletop games. The Bear Table is a Necrotic Clock Production.
How often does The Bear Table release new episodes?
The Bear Table has 50 episodes. Check the episode list to see recent publication dates and frequency.
Where can I listen to The Bear Table?
You can listen to The Bear Table on PodParley by clicking any episode. We provide an embedded audio player for direct listening, and you can also subscribe via your preferred podcast app using the RSS feed.
Who hosts The Bear Table?
The Bear Table is created and hosted by Necrotic Clock Productions.
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