The Born Stupid Show

Sweating with a bunch of dudes, what’s that finger thing do, t-back tractor pulls, Facebook marketplace idiots and one and done with fishing. Also, endless mouth breathing, John wants a mirror on the ceiling, you can’t tourniquet a taint, Mica knows the sites and glory holes. All that and more on this episode of The Born Stupid Show.

Mica had a terrible 12 hours, she got a rim job, John killed a rat, Harry Hog has died and doing it for Dale. Also, the poon platoon, John and Mica carry on about conspiracy theories, white people are athletic, Brock Lesner’s daughter will destroy you and  helping your special needs friend. All that and more on this episode of The Born Stupid Show.

John wants to be bed ridden, can I see your receipt sir, is it too late for Christmas gifts, Mica’s murder story and you’re a good looking guy. Also, attempted HOA overthrow, coffee shop encounters, have you ever been in Ross’ shoes and put my dick in the meat slicer. All that and more on this episode of The Born Stupid Show.

Back after 5 months away, someone is having a baby, eagle facts, Kevin shit in his crate and super-size that bitch. Also, selling shit on Facebook shows you how stupid people are, fuck bees, John looks like a picnic, the shit won’t flush and  them damn hoes.

We are back because preseason football sucks, Mica got a new dog, night time A/C test is a success, there’s a new Happy Gilmore movie and always hold a grudge. Also, meetings that shouldn’t be meetings, three types of people in this world and running out of positivity. All that and more on this episode of The Born Stupid show.

We are back after a break, John’s got a cock, getting poked by your wife and cut the balls off the hog. Also, shitting your pants at the age of 37, fuck love bugs, hurricane season is right around the corner, is it a buffalo or bison and every state needs an NFL team. All that and more on this episode of The Born Stupid show.

Kevin is a sock sucker, leaving surprises under the bed, vote for Mica as your HOA president, redneck strength, earthing and the gay chick in the jeep. Also, lets race some Altimas, Sally did what by the seas shore?, male order brides and Ross has a fat head. All that and more on this episode of The Born Stupid show.

Grab his dick and twist it, thumbing the butthole, NASCAR is back, what makes Ross excited, dragging me to a concert and the Super Bowl sucked. Also, how about this jersey instead, Kevin has joined the family, another year without a Daytona 500 party and how much grey matter. All that and more on this episode of The Born Stupid show.

Hard sausage, getting the right valentine gift, why is Ctrl V paste, John’s pot store and Eddie is smoking the meat. Also, don’t be an asshole in the merge lane, suck your own titty, purchases at the school book store, it’s hard to pee when it’s cold and coochie pop. All that and more on this episode of The Born Stupid show.

Mica is officially old today, no porn in Florida, make sure you pick up the shit, RIP Disney Quest and the fossil store. Also, did you see that?, John can’t drive, cut the pork chop, it’s been cold as shit, and Daytona is back. All that and more on this episode of The Born Stupid show.

It’s 2025, fake movie trailer ads, unfortunate 2025 laws, recapping the holidays and Dolly Parton is a buoy. Also, boob wine, Chunky Soup connoisseur, lawn mower gremlins and mom gave you dicks. All that and more on this episode of The Born Stupid show.

Santa Claus is coming to town, a bad situation a Dick’s, John doesn’t do butt stuff, torture in Disney movies and Big Bad John. Also, I ran over your bush, insurance is a scam, drone stories are getting out of hand, what’s Pope doin’ and a caterpillar is still a caterpillar. All that and more on this episode of The Born Stupid show.

Lil’ Dusty, pissing off moms, the fun police, Mica’s favorite childhood super hero, John didn’t make it to second base and being hit so hard you remember it the rest of your life. Also, pooping outside the check-in station, not giving a shit about your fantasy team, no snare in my headphones and Cam is a creep. All that and more on this episode of The Born Stupid show.

John doesn’t like how it feels on his lips, Chik-fil A’s drive-thru is terrible, what do we the Swiss do, Mica is in the molding business and Luke Bryan strikes again. Also, joining a softball team, hard as a pancake, who made this shit and napping at Grandma’s house. All that and more on this episode of The Born Stupid show.

John and Mica’s typical drive to lunch, getting harassed on the way to coffee, finally getting a new phone, whales taking out boats and dying with your dick in your hand, every song is Luke Bryan and going to Gator Land. All that and more on this episode of The Born Stupid show.

Ross is already upset, what does an asshole and a fridge have in common, ant colony in Mica’s truck, terrified from Pornhub and getting into confrontations at a concert. Also, John’s a terrible lunch date, never turn your back on family, I wonder what Air-Bud is up to and son of a bitch you did it. All that and more on this episode of The Born Stupid show.

The proper way to dispose oil, why do they call it fossil fuel, HOA’s are assholes, hog hunting and taking a trip with no phone charger. Also, the wood pecker pecks it, that old bag, Crown Royal hits different, nap spaces at work and stupid random TSA checks. All that and more on this episode of The Born Stupid show.

John loves Skeletor, the J is hay, filling out your yearly review, predatory lunch ladies and what were you doing in there. Also, hanging out in fly over states, take me fishing, the dresser matches the drapes, having your own Pee-Wee and don’t leave your butter behind. All that and more on this episode of The Born Stupid show.

Ross doesn’t get invited to fishing, you’d think Mica is in his 70’s, John loves the T’s, Dick’s after dinner, making all the shots, and getting bought out of your company Also, gotta do some herbs, it’s not mine, get to the fucking point and bright fleshlight. All that and more on this episode of The Born Stupid show.

Everyone started as a winner, John’s seeing shit, they don’t make things like they use to, a dude sets himself on fire and Mica wants to work at a Chinese restaurant. Also, spray tanning your sister-in-law, real-life Beavis and Butt-Head, Fast and the Furious is getting out of hand and green or black olives. All that and more on this episode of The Born Stupid show.

John loves the pickles, chicken bacon ranch without ranch, Karens man, pasteurized and unpasteurized cheeses and Hardy is terrible. My mom is in the bargain bin, eating lunch like a first grader, the one thing you’d eat for the rest of your life, the dad jokes never end and cats giving you pink eye. All that and more on this episode of The Born Stupid show.

Mica wants tacos, coworkers….not friends, John is nasally, not being invited to the orgy, bears in the area and Hey Blinkin. Also, why is Ross always angry, glamping, built in birth control, flippage of the scriptage and fossils in fossil fuel. All that and more on this episode of The Born Stupid show.

Energy drinks nobody has heard about, George never told no lie, Lowes Pros hacks, jerking off in the truck at 8:31am, how Korn got their name and nasty sit-ups. Also, getting hit on by your cousin, party pops, dressing for the occasion, John loves Luke Bryan and AI songs. All that and more on this episode of The Born Stupid show.

We are back after a hiatus, Ross doesn’t deal with spammers, hearing gun shot 200 yards from your house, Deadpool and Wolverine, Mica can’t stop quoting Adam Sandler and barely making home. Also, Lil John’s sausage, being a social butterfly, being judged at a restaurant and its so good that you shit before you leave the place. All that and more on this episode of The Born Stupid show.

We will all be blind soon, te-te-tequila, Eric Bisqoff, civilization has developed in Mica’s area and cargo shorts. 32 people are coming, how to pay for services, multiple Punishers, lets do lunch and take that damn screen protector off. All that and more on this episode of The Born Stupid show.

It hits close to home nowadays, John loves Dick’s, I got that bread, UPSP is terrible, being a drag on vacation and skeeting on tooth brushes. Also, losing pets that required maintenance, struggling reading your kids bed time stories, get fuked spammers  and baby sized burritos. All that and more on this episode of The Born Stupid show.

Ross wakes up and chooses violence, everyone is guilty of us not being here for a month, Jenny’s dead, pet cemetery, Grumpy banged Cinderella and John has seen all the oceans. All the movies we’ve just now recently seen, the hair on your ankles blowing in the wind and I drink alone. All that and more on this episode of The Born Stupid show.

The ole 2 for 1, Sgt. Slaughter disease, picking out your vegetables, when does morning end, stumblin’ and fumblin’ and MS Paint porn. Also, Mica’s got a paint booth, the Daytona 500 party is next week….or is it, Ross is grillin’, John isn’t jacked about tools and not as sweet as the D. All that and more on this episode of The Born Stupid show.

We are experiencing technical difficulties, John ruined Ross’ dad’s mustang, hijacking the touch tunes, the drive to survive and fancy race car people. Also,  it’s tax season bitches, I prefer it instant, I’m the tramp, what are you hiding in those slacks and fly like an eagle. All that and more on this episode of The Born Stupid show.

John has become terrible at Instagram, new seltzers for the boys, Ross has never grilled anything, car manufacturers are a fraud, a good faith deposit and hanging out with the girls. Also, a bunch of circus jerks, dry heaving in the parking lot, race track life, John went to Nebraska and round house kick with these Jesus sandals. All that and more on this episode of The Born Stupid show.

I don’t want to be here, I’m more white trash than you, sandwich bag of $1 bills in the glove box, kids games are a scam and how kids are made. Also, keistering cosmic pixie dust, kicking the dust up, pre butter your corn, the shit Mica has us google and getting with the technology. All that and more on this episode of The Born Stupid show.

Kano’s an ass man, every lunch ends with dicks, finding what scratch offs have the best odds, that’s a fucking tank man, Mica’s mom dropped him off at the fire department and Christmas has come and gone. Also, learning to ride a bike, John won’t mount a bass, the ultimate stocking stuffer, wine that makes your nipples burn and show your work. All that and more on this episode of The Born Stupid show.

Ross guilt trips Danielle into having a Christmas party, wedding season is here, tucked in behind the one tree and shrubbery, a trip to the Bobby Maldalves, not so reflective glass and honeymoon wine. Also, we’re in international waters, John uses left handed scissors, and adult tax talk. All that and more on this episode of The Born Stupid show.

 Last show before Thanksgiving, doubling up at lunch, the only participant in a tire changing contest, riding dirty and getting free gas. Also, wedding songs, John had scallops for dinner, homemade over instant, self-cleaning foreskins, get them in that Christmas spirit and everyone hates Creed and Nickleback. All that and more on this episode of The Born Stupid show.

Multiple birthdays since we last met, new High Noon flavors, new clothes smell, where’s the meatloaf and what John’s kids are eating these days. Also, make sure you check your Halloween candy, Thanksgiving is coming up fast, butter or margarine and more wings for your buck. All that and more on this episode of The Born Stupid show.

Fantasy football is more important than real football, smelling like a bass, John loves noodlin’, wearing Laney Wilson pants, brand new man, and movies you’ve seen once. Crying at a wedding for people you don’t even know, what’s a ¼ of 1/3, jacking off in another mans house and the league is bussin’. All that and more on this episode of The Born Stupid show.

John’s phone problems, dreaming of titties at 6:15, just over a full rotation, be a good tipper, donating to charities and maxipad or tampon kind of guy. Also, wedding plans, bad tan lines, treating your robot right, softcore corn or hardcore corn, drinking in the suit shop and drinking for free at the jewelry store. All that and more on this episode of The Born Stupid show.

It’s officially pumpkin spice season, defacing the new podcast table, fighting food poisoning, Steve the fish and terrible dad jokes. Also, John doesn’t elaborate, putting too much info in time off requests, big plans, dodging traffic for golf balls and bread’s bread bro. All that and more on this episode of The Born Stupid show.

John came early, torture that was football camp, Kano is a big boy now, Hey Dude, elastic waist pants and chili cheese corn dogs. Also, you gotta stand for something, tall people weigh a lot, speaking to the Lord and Savior, leaked celebrities’ photos, laughing at your own jokes, and it’s almost officially fall All that and more on this episode of The Born Stupid show.

Mr. Creed, smashing pumpkins at Mica’s house, taking the lose, risky Instagram messages and tool porn. Also, talking dirty, school pizza, tranny jobs, what position did Air Bud play, blown coverages and comparing flesh wounds. All that and more on this episode of The Born Stupid show.

Giant nipples, cadaver part, look at this cock, someone is a tired whore, freeze your meat and splitting your shit wide open. Also, winning raffle tickets, what kind of detergent do you use, fishing in the dark, it’s fantasy season, parkour and the Bermuda triangle. All that and more on this episode of The Born Stupid show.

Ross is dying, simultaneously getting it, Abe Lincoln never told no lies, Johns new app, a Chiwawa with Great Dane and she got grabbed in the crunch. Also, sticking your dick in the meat slicer, wanna go back to my place for some pretzel crust, Forrest or Bobby and who needs spell check. All that and more on this episode of The Born Stupid show.

I wanna see him finish – I’ve only seen the first movie, Mica still only watches the free channels, Ross is a believer, who was the first an on the moon, selling stuff on Facebook and people no showing. Also, I’m not cranky, auto-drafts in fantasy drafts, making money of simps, concerts you wouldn’t go to and dinners done. All that and more on this episode of The Born Stupid show.

Mica keeps getting car sick, John is a terrible driver, somebody is on steroids, dopple gangers and black cock down. Also, shits like a horse, catch and release program, tornadic activity, all you do is work and wrestling shirts ay school. All that and more on this episode of The Born Stupid show.

We went to Luke Combs, Laney Wilson needs to sell her pants, old people hate concerts, John had a birthday, Mica gets car sick, and you know the quality of people by their teeth. Also, smokin’ on tat broccoli, butter up the buns, the taco never makes it home, what does PDQ mean and the cougar beer. All that and more on this episode of The Born Stupid show.

Hell yeah man….congratulations, going hard at a 3 year old birthday party, come in my backyard, piss poor contract work, Johns a downer. Fishing for hoes at Beef O’Bradys, watch out for gators, on a TUESDAY, John’s a troll, Mica is gonna be sick, I got muscles, can’t puke and shit in the same toilet and pooping problems. All that and more on this episode of The Born Stupid show.

Putting in some late night work, Knotty Vines review, your butthole smells stale, strong sangria, John’s very handsy, Ross’ animals are conspiring against him, Mica’s spirit singer and eating food cold. Also, fat spiderman, chomping down on pork rinds, jet ski boats, nut sack on wheels and sheeeeesh. All that and more on this episode of The Born Stupid show.

We’re halfway there, Bon Jovi makes you head hurt, she has busted balls, John wants fake titties, old ass celebrities are still knocking broads up, what cars that fit animals and let pull up this console. Kano invades personal space, half and half, get over here with that New Testament, and long way or the short way. All that and more on this episode of The Born Stupid show.

Six months from the big day, Mica plotting his voyage home, 3 and a half wood dagwood, near life-ending situations, tucking it and no more dip trio. Also, bingo with the fam, multiple times a day, poop challenges, don’t put stuff on the counters and you can’t fix stupid. All that and more on this episode of The Born Stupid show.

Bi-centennial plus one episode, guessing Ross’ SSN, be there in a minute, spicy chicky sandwich, elephant trunk helping you put your shoes on, butt deuces and like a cock. Also, get your ass out here and do it, more off than on, wearing another man’s jeans, free hotel pillows and Ross talks to you like the piece of shit you are. All that and more on this episode of The Born Stupid show.