PODCAST · comedy
The Center Cut
by Michael Valeri Jr and David Borowy
Michael and Dave only watch the beginning and ends of movies and TV seasons. The rest is chaos.
Episodes
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The 4th Annual Golden Gorilla Penis Awards
Michael and Dave close out the fourth season of the podcast with the 4th annual Golden Gorilla Penis Awards. This one hits hard because...well...you'll just have to listen in. Relive some of your favorite memories from the 4th season of the show, and then just don't forget that all four years…
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Brother Bear w/Kaye
Michael and Dave watched the first and last 15 minutes of the forgotten Disney film Brother Bear. OG fan and fellow-ish podcaster Kaye joined to quiz the guys on the middle. Nothing ever dies, bear penises are bigger than human penises, and Tina Turner + Phill Collins are old now. For this and…
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Abbott Elementary (Season 1)
Michael and Dave watched the first and last episodes of the first season of the critically acclaimed mockumentary Abbott Elementary. The Reddit and Facebook admins in the Abbott community can fuck right off. After nearly 100 tv shows covered, we finally found one that can eat a bag of dicks. But...
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Dazed and Confused w/John Montague (That Rules Podcast)
Alright, alright, alright! Michael and Dave watched the first and last 15 minutes of the cult classic Dazed and Confused. Comedian and fellow podcaster John Montague of That Rules podcast joined to quiz the guys on the middle. Their listeners keep getting younger and we just stay the same age....
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Ted Lasso (Season 3)
Michael and Dave watched the first and last episodes of the third (and probably final) season of the futbol fan favorite Ted Lasso. Good show, but not its best season, at least judging by the ends. Michael wants to see the old coach's balls. Dave makes fun of Michael's out of favor language. And...
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Sharknado w/Steve Coates (Bucket of Chum Podcast)
Michael and Dave watched the first and last 15 minutes of the absolutely ridiculous SyFy pulp Sharknado. Fellow podcaster Steve Coates of the Bucket of Chum podcast joined to quiz the guys on the middle. While unfortunately there were no bowls of butter on board, Steve was a breath of fresh air…
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Fleabag (Season 2)
Michael and Dave watched the first and last episodes of the second season of the profound yet filthy Fleabag. Phoebe Waller-Bridge is still a sexy plank. No more Beaver man, and Arsehole Guy + Harry only make cameos. Instead this season is allll about the hot priest. And boy is he hot. The guys...
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Chinatown w/ Chris Harris (Harris Football Podcast)
Michael and Dave watched the first and last 15 minutes of the 1970's neo noir Chinatown. Author and fantasy football podcaster Chris Harris joined to quiz the guys on the middle. Audio quality went awry due to technology issues, but we still managed to tough it out. Family trees were debated…
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Fleabag (Season 1)
Michael and Dave watched the first and last episodes of the first season of the happily filthy show Fleabag. Phoebe Waller-Bridge is indeed a sexy plank. Michael struggles with his disdain for ancient British people and how it shades his viewing. David struggles with watching anything that isn't...
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American Beauty w/Camila
Michael and Dave watched the first and last 15 minutes of the critically acclaimed but now blackmarked American Beauty. Camila of the podcast Bibliophiles at Home joined to quiz the guys on the middle. First on the docket: F Kevin Spacey to the moon. He's gone? Cool. While his creepiness in this...
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BONUS: Patreon Sneak Peek - Ask Me Anything Part 4
Michael and Dave wanted to share an episode that was previously exclusive to Patreon, recorded over a month ago. We hope you laugh, we hope you cry, but most of all, we hope you enjoy yourself for a fourth time. And please joint The Center Cult! Join The Center Cult Patreon for bonus content and...
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BEEF (Netflix)
Michael and Dave watched the first and last episodes of the critically acclaimed (rightfully so) Netflix show BEEF. Michael hates George. Dave hates George's mom. They both like to stress eat like Danny. But that's not the only thing they agree on--they both love this show, despite it reminding...
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Butt Boy w/Bryan
Michael and Dave watched the first and last 15 minutes of the independent assfest Butt Boy. Michael's brother and podcast music man Bryan joins the guys to quiz them on the middle. We said butthole/asshole/colon so many times--maybe even more than all our other episodes combined. This is not a...
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Outer Banks (Season 3)
Michael and Dave watched the first and last episodes of the third season of the attractive teen (who aren't really teens) Netflix show Outer Banks. Outer Banks made appearances in our first and second seasons, so we're glad to have it back! But not that glad since this season is outrageous. The…
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Encanto w/Shoot the Flick
Michael and Dave watched the first and last 15 minutes of the catchy-tune havin' Encanto. Frankie and Scott of Shoot the Flick join the guys to quiz them on the middle. There's a first time for everything as Michael can't quite perform under pressure. Dave crushes it...but we don't talk about…
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Ginny and Georgia (Season 1)
Michael and Dave watched the first and last episodes of the first season of Ginny and Georgia. Dave thinks all the characters are jerks, Michael spends more time than he would like discussing the teen sex scene, and they both would go down for gambling in New Orleans with Georgia. Emphasis on the...
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High Fidelity w/Vinyl Reckoning
Michael and Dave watched the first and last 15 minutes of lyric-generating High Fidelity. Matt and Stacy of Vinyl Reckoning join the guys to quiz them on the middle. Michael is flabbergasted at all the songs that his favorite bands created based around this movie. Dave is just there for Jack…
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Over the Garden Wall
Michael and Dave watched the first and last episodes of the ever-kooky Over the Garden Wall, as suggested by friend of the show Vikki. The guys both agree Greg is the best. His pants are always overflowing with candy, he does cool things by accident, and always knows what to say (even if it…
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The Shawshank Redemption w/Rob Stant
Michael and Dave watched the first and last 15 minutes of the so-called greatest movie of all time, The Shawshank Redemption. Comedian Rob Stant joins the guys to quiz them on the middle. Michael has some interesting theories about Rita Hayworth, Dave is obsessed with Andy's crappy boat, and Rob...
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BONUS: The Center Cult Sneak Peek 1
Michael and Dave watched nothing. But here is a sneak peek of a recent chat, exclusive to Patreon! Get Center Chats, The Center Consumed, voting, The Center Cache, early access, shout-outs, and surprises! Help support the show that supports your boring days with weird shit. Please and thank you!...
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Wednesday (Netflix)
Michael and Dave watched the first and last episodes of the Netflix Tim Burton sensation Wednesday. Michael is fascinated by Ortega's wild BJ-Gods vision posture and thinks Crackstone looks like the Quaker Oats guy. Dave is obsessed with Thing, and Luis Guzman, and both the guys hate the Hyde.…
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A Christmas Story Christmas
Michael and Dave watched the first and last 15 minutes of the HBO Max legacy sequel A Christmas Story Christmas. Its a Christmas extravaganza! Wives Ashley and Emily joined the show for the second holiday season to quiz the guys on the middle that they didn't watch. Peter is back as Ralphie, but...
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The Center Cult Announcement
Michael and Dave watched nothing. They are here to announce the grand opening of The Center Cult Patreon! Center Chats, The Center Consumed, voting, The Center Cache, early access, shout-outs, and surprises! Help support the show that supports your boring days with weird shit. Please and thank…
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The 3rd Annual Golden Gorilla Penis Awards
Michael and Dave close out the third season of the podcast with the 3rd annual Golden Gorilla Penis Awards. So many choices, so little time. Share your favorite memories from the third year and buckle up for another insane new season coming your way in three weeks! And stay tuned for an important...
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CENTER CHAT: Ted Lasso (Season 2) - Diamond Dogs Draft
Michael and Dave watched the first and last episodes of the second season of Ted Lasso. Go check out the full episode if you haven't and then decide: Who would be in YOUR Diamond Dogs crew? CENTER CHAT! Send us an audio message! Send your feedback and new episode ideas to:...
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Ted Lasso (Season 2)
Michael and Dave came back to England and watched the first and last episodes of the second season of Ted Lasso. The guys don't always agree, but today they definitely concur that Nate is a grey haired, rotten faced, no good little piece of poo poo. They want to buy his childhood home, shit in…
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CENTER CHAT: The Nightmare Before Christmas - Halloween Vs. Christmas
Michael and Dave watched the first and last 15 minutes of The Nightmare Before Christmas and friend of the show Cindy quizzed them on the middle. Go check out the full episode if you haven't and then decide: Which holiday is better--Halloween or Chrismas? CENTER CHAT! Send us an audio message!…
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The Nightmare Before Christmas w/Cindy
What's this?! Michael and Dave watched the first and last 15 minutes of the holiday cult class The Nightmare Before Christmas. Creator of the podcast logo, Cindy, joined the guys to quiz them on the middle. There are tender lumplings everywhere, but no sightings of Sally's asshole. While she's…
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CENTER CHAT: Ted Lasso (Season 1) - Is Jason Sudeikis Hot?
Michael and Dave watched the first and last episodes of the first season of Ted Lasso. Go check out the full episode if you haven't and then decide: Is Jason Sudeikis hot? CENTER CHAT! Send us an audio message! Send your feedback and new episode ideas to: [email protected] Follow us on...
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Ted Lasso (Season 1)
Michael and Dave watched the first and last episodes of the first season of the Emmy-slaying Ted Lasso. He's here, he's there, the guys are both fans, Roy Kent! Dave's a fan of the humor; Michael's a fan of the uplifting nature, and they both agree that Roy's penis is a rectangle. Thanks for...
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CENTER CHAT: The Hunt - Is Hillary Swank Hot?
Michael and Dave watched the first and last 15 minutes of The Hunt and Jasmin and Mells of Damn Fine TV podcast quizzed them on the middle. Go check out the full episode if you haven't and then decide: Is Hillary Swank hot? CENTER CHAT! Send us an audio message! Send your feedback and new episode...
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The Hunt w/Damn Fine TV
Michael and Dave watched the first and last 15 minutes of the Covid casualty The Hunt. Returning for a second time, Jasmine and Mells of Damn Fine TV podcast joined the guys to quiz them on the middle. Everybody tries to keep the political discussions to a minimum, but Michael of course can't…
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CENTER CHAT: The Bear (FX/Hulu) (Season 1) - Restaurant Ideas
Michael and Dave watched the first and last episodes of The Bear on FX/Hulu. Go check out the full episode if you haven't and then decide: What type of restaurant/bar would YOU open? CENTER CHAT! Send us an audio message! Send your feedback and new episode ideas to: [email protected]...
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The Bear (FX/Hulu) (Season 1)
Michael and Dave watched the first and last episodes of the first season of the critically acclaimed The Bear on FX/Hulu, Chef. Does it hold up to its (as of recording) 100% critic score on Rotten Tomatoes? Is it fire? Is it all that and a can of tomatoes? Or do the guys want to drink some Ecto...
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CENTER CHAT: A Quiet Place - Lee Abbott Vs. Jim Halpert
Michael and Dave watched the first and last 15 minutes of A Quiet Place and Nick and Marcus of Now Try This podcast quizzed them on the middle. Go check out the full episode if you haven't and then decide: Would you rather marry Lee Abbott or Jim Halpert? CENTER CHAT! Send us an audio message!…
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A Quiet Place w/Now Try This Podcast
Michael and Dave watched the first and last 15 minutes of the silent but deadly A Quiet Place. Nick and Marcus of Now Try This podcast joined the guys to quiz them on the middle. Michael hates the youngest child with a fiery passion, hates the fact that everybody is barefoot instead of wearing...
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CENTER CHAT: Euphoria (Season 1) - Sexy Disney Characters
Michael and Dave watched the first and last episodes of the first season of Euphoria. This doesn't have a TON to do with that. Really, Michael is just going on vacation to Disney World. But, go check out the full episode if you haven't and then decide: Which Disney World characters would YOU want...
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Euphoria (Season 1)
Michael and Dave watched the first and last episodes of the first season of the trippy Euphoria. Does Zendaya RUE the day she took drugs for the first time? Do Jules JEWELS ever get in the way? Nate Jacobs is a walking pile of pig excrement, but is Maddy MAD HE exists? Okay, that last one was a...
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CENTER CHAT: Fast Times at Ridgemont High - Supreme Court Judge Vs. Judge Reinhold
Michael and Dave watched the first and last 15 minutes of Fast Times at Ridgemont High and Lindsey and Sepideh of Two Salty Broads podcast quizzed them on the middle. Go check out the full episode if you haven't and then decide: Would you rather be a Supreme Court judge or Judge Reinhold? CENTER...
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Fast Times at Ridgemont High w/Two Salty Broads Podcast
Michael and Dave watched the first and last 15 minutes of the iconic (for some reason) 80's comedy Fast Times at Ridgemont High. Lindsey and Sepideh of the Two Salty Broads podcast join the guys to quiz them on the middle. Spicoli can get it, stereo salesman guy can get a meatball sub and fuck…
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CENTER CHAT: Umbrella Academy (Season 3) - Academy Draft
Michael and Dave watched the first and last episodes of the third season of Umbrella Academy. Go check out the full episode if you haven't and then decide: Who would be in your Umbrella or Sparrow Academy? CENTER CHAT! Use the Code FRIEND and host a podcast! Send us an audio message! Send your...
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Umbrella Academy (Season 3)
Michael and Dave watched the first and last episodes of the third season of Umbrella Academy on Netflix. They're back for a second time to gawk over their Annual Award show namesake Luther and question just what the hell is going on. Michael supports Elliot Page but not his hair, Dave is very...
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CENTER CHAT: Mr. Nobody - Old Nemo Vs. Finding Nemo
Michael and Dave watched the first and last 15 minutes of Mr. Nobody and comedian Ant Perez quizzed them on the middle. Go check out the full episode if you haven't and then decide: Would you rather be 118 year old Nemo from the movie or the fish from Finding Nemo? CENTER CHAT! Use the Code…
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Mr. Nobody w/Ant Perez
Michael and Dave watched the first and last 15 minutes of the mind-bending Leto joint Mr. Nobody. Comedian Ant Perez joins the guys to quiz them on the middle. There are so many Jared Letos that it would be impossible to talk about them all. But, stepsisters are sexed, pet pigs are lampooned, and...
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CENTER CHAT: Outer Range - Bull Ride Vs. Bar Fight
Michael and Dave watched the first and last episodes of Outer Range. Go check out the full episode if you haven't and then decide: Would you rather ride a bull once a week or get in a bar fight once a year? CENTER CHAT! Try AG1 and be like us! Send us an audio message! Send your feedback and new...
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Outer Range
Michael and Dave watched the first and last episodes of the Amazon Prime sci-fi western show Outer Range. This one's a hole lotta' fun. We don't do typos. Figure it out. Spoiler alert, the guys find a new show that they both thoroughly enjoy! They both agree that Billy is the best character, Josh...
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CENTER CHAT: Hereditary - Tree House Vs. Nudist Colony
Michael and Dave watched the first and last 15 minutes of The Hereditary and Chris Fafalios of Punchline and many other things, quizzed them on the middle. Go check out the full episode if you haven't and then decide: Would you rather live in a tree house or nudist colony? CENTER CHAT! Try AG1!...
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Hereditary w/Chris Fafalios (Punchline band, One Hit Thunder podcast)
Michael and Dave watched the first and last 15 minutes of their second Ari Aster film: Hereditary. Genuinely good dude Chris Fafalios joins the guys as the first repeat guest to tell spooky tales and quiz them on the middle. For once there is a natural reason to talk about penises! Michael is a...
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CENTER CHAT: Ask Me Anything - Part 3
Michael and Dave watched nothing, again! This is the third installment where our listeners delivered us many great (and horrible) questions, and the guys debated. We hope you laugh, we hope you cry, but most of all, we hope you enjoy yourself for a third time. CENTER CHAT! Try AG1 and be like us!...
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Outlander (Season 5)
Its the 100th episode! But we don't have time for fanfare! Michael and Dave watched the first and last episodes of the fifth season of Outlander. Five seasons in and they still know next to nothing. Michael doesn't like Bree's wedding dress or the cake. Dave apparently loves Outlander now, weird....
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Frequently Asked Questions
How many episodes does The Center Cut have?
The Center Cut currently has 151 episodes available on PodParley. New episodes are automatically indexed when they're published to the podcast feed.
What is The Center Cut about?
Michael and Dave only watch the beginning and ends of movies and TV seasons. The rest is chaos.
How often does The Center Cut release new episodes?
The Center Cut publishes regularly with 151 episodes available. Check the episode list for the typical release schedule.
Where can I listen to The Center Cut?
You can listen to The Center Cut on PodParley by clicking any episode. We provide an embedded audio player for direct listening, and you can also subscribe via your preferred podcast app using the RSS feed.
Who hosts The Center Cut?
The Center Cut is created and hosted by Michael Valeri Jr and David Borowy.
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