The Everyday Human

September: On Friendship and ConnectionSeptember 16You are a fragile thing. One betrayal, you can get over that. You can find more in your heart to give to others. Two? Maybe. Three? Well, the more you feel that knife in your back, the less likely you are to let your guard down and trust others in the future, and it can soon become a lonely and paranoid existence. As we said, it’s a very human thing to do. Of course there are exceptions, but we don’t enter into relationships with the intent of betrayal. Self interests, temptations, or self-destructive tendencies, though, can emerge and grow until they can no longer be cut back and strangle the relationship.It happens.If you’ve been betrayed, the best thing you can do is forgive the person who hurt you and move on. Holding onto resentment and anger harms no one but yourself. If you are the one holding the knife, put it down and speak true to the person in front of you. The truth can hurt, but it’s far nobler to stand before someone face to face than to lurk in the shadows waiting for an opportunity to stick the knife into their back.Reflection title: Not if, but WhenCreative inspiration: William Shakespeare, Julius CaesarReflection question: Have I been betrayed in a personal relationship or at work? Have I committed the betrayal? How have I handled it in the past and how will I handle it in the future?

September: On Friendship and ConnectionSeptember 15And there is something strange and mysterious about danger and death that latches on to each end of the thread and yanks it quickly and mercilessly until it is taut. It comes about from natural disasters, accidents, wars, shared traumatic events. When the waters recede, when the tinkling of broken glass and the hissing of the destroyed radiator subside, when the bullets stop flying and the bombs stop dropping—the thread is pulled so tight you might worry it’ll snap. The survivors look to one another with surprise and wonder and a thankful air about them—to god or the universe or fate—that they survived, but then more than that, that another soul survived with them.Reflection title: That Which Doesn’t Kill You Brings You CloserCreative inspiration: Stephen Crane, The Red Badge of CourageReflection question: What bonds have formed from close calls or strenuous situations in my life?

September: On Friendship and ConnectionSeptember 14There is a version of us that we shouldn’t have to water down or bend or make logical or force to fit the current fashion. Yes, if you’re a creative, you must be yourself. Now it is more important than ever, I believe. But just as a human, too—there needs to be an outlet for the true you. You have to be able to throw all of those hats away, even if only for a moment, to let that true inner version of you stretch and breathe. Be it in a quiet moment of solitude in the morning before the house wakes. Be it dancing and singing by yourself, spontaneously given life by a random song on your playlist. Or be it conversing and being in the presence of another soul who accepts and loves you for who you are without reservation and without judgment. Someone who doesn’t want or need all those other versions of you to be present in the moment and embraces the simple, unadulterated, unabashed you.Reflection title: Chuck the HatsCreative inspiration: Ann Rice, Franz Kafka: The Complete Short Stories (Intro)Reflection question: Am I wearing too many hats and sometimes forgetting to take them off? What do I look like without them?

September: On Friendship and ConnectionSeptember 13I think, in order to lead a fulfilling life, we can and must do three things (or maybe two if you look at it through Stevenson’s lens): love, serve, and create. And while it is possible to love oneself and create for oneself, to serve oneself might be a stretch sometimes (though you must care for yourself, which is a sense of service, I suppose). But relationships and friendships make all of these things possible. In doing these three things, whether intentionally or not, meaning is created. Purpose blooms. There becomes a reason to wake up in the morning, get dressed, and get to work—whatever that might look like for you. This shines a light on what is beyond the day-to-day redundancies, and the seemingly meaningless tasks we must do to participate in society suddenly are given meaning. In doing so you become, in a way, indispensable. You cannot be useless when you are loving, being loved, serving, and creating with and for others.Here is the true value found in life. And it cannot be bought or sold.Reflection title: To Love, To Serve, To CreateCreative inspiration: Robert Louis Stevenson, Lay MoralsReflection question: Am I loving, serving, and creating? With whom or for whom?

September: On Friendship and ConnectionSeptember 12A gift is not a utilitarian act. Sure, you could give someone something they “need” like a tool or a car (who actually gives cars other than the weirdos in car commercials at Christmas time?), but that sort of gift might soon be forgotten. No, a gift—a true gift with meaning—is a symbol. It’s a physical representation or manifestation of the bond of love and friendship between two people, and they can serve as beautiful (but also painful) reminders of certain times and people in your life.Yes, a gift is a beautiful part of what it means to be human.Reflection title: To Gift a DandelionCreative inspiration: Eastin DeVerna, Dead World: A Post-Apocalyptic TaleReflection question: When did I last give or receive a meaningful gift? And why was it meaningful to me?

September: On Friendship and ConnectionSeptember 11In another life you are a warrior-chief made of stone and flesh. You train your people endlessly against the threat of invasion, or for the promise of expanding your territory. You take them to the highest peaks of the mountains to slay the winds and into the darkest depths of the cavernous continent below the surface to batter the shadows. You forever seek out the strongest and most hardened opponents to test your mettle and sharpen your blades upon. Until one day, the child from the red hells below—Death—arrives. He has come to expand his collection with those from your world and the challenge is welcome, until first Coden is slain and then you must fight and bargain with the child and he promises to take not every soul, but only those he seeks—and he seeks all but two, leaving you with your young child to roam the lands as ghosts from another world. But soon, more come—a wizard and king seeking your strength—and they take the last thing you have left . . . your child. With none left to wield the invention of war, your world flourishes. Vines cover spears and swords sink into the earth, trees overtake towers, and waters that once ran red now run crystal cerulean and it is a realm of peace. But as you wander alone, it means nothing to you. It means nothing without them.Reflection title: It Means Nothing Without ThemCreative inspiration: Johann Wolfgang von Goethe, Wilhelm Meister's ApprenticeshipReflection question: What are those things on this earth that are better shared with others? And who do I wish to share them with?

September: On Friendship and ConnectionSeptember 10Sometimes the measure of a friendship can be weighed by the trouble you find yourself in—by fault of your own or not—and the friends you can’t trust to let you face it alone. Is it who you expected it to be? Or is that person nowhere to be found when you need them? Or is it someone else? Someone you never thought would come to your aid? You can’t expect people to follow you blindly or put themselves in danger or difficult situations for you, but if they do, you can be sure that’s a friend.More than 20 years later, I don’t even remember what those fights were about that led to quitting the band and the breakup. What I do remember is the friend who drove out to my house that night when I didn’t have anyone else.Reflection title: Or Following You Like HoundsCreative inspiration: J.R.R. Tolkien, The Fellowship of the RingReflection question: Who is willing to stand by me and follow me like a hound? And who am I willing to do the same for?

September: On Friendship and ConnectionSeptember 9Joy is a beautiful thing that can be felt individually, but is somehow all the more sweeter when sharing it with a friend. The next time you stumble upon a little bit of joy, make it a point to share it with your partner, friend, colleague, whoever—you’ll make their day, and you’ll be a little better off for it.Reflection title: Plenty To Go AroundCreative inspiration: Mark Twain, Following the Equator: A Journey Around the WorldReflection question: What joy has someone shared with me lately? What joy have I shared, and can I make it a point to share a bit of joy today? Let me come back here at the end of the day or the start of the next to write down the bit of joy I shared. 

September: On Friendship and ConnectionSeptember 8Humans are not meant to be lonely and without companionship. We aren’t made for it. Our minds and bodies deteriorate in isolation (not to be confused with a controlled amount of healthy solitude). Isolation is even used as a punishment or form of torture. Touch, smiles, laughter, conversations, presence—these are essential things to strip one of. These are inherently part of what makes humans human. You might as well take the air or the sunlight or water away from them. If you find yourself without friends or companionship now or in the future, and if you’re feeling up for it, look for ways to make some. Start with what interests you—it’s sure to interest others—and go from there. And if you are fortunate to have the sustenance of friendship, nurture it and keep it healthy, but also reach out to someone who may not be so lucky. It could make all the difference in their life . . . and in yours.Reflection title: Who Are the Friendless?Creative inspiration: Home Alone 2: Lost in New YorkReflection question: How can I nurture the friendships I have? How can I start new friendships for myself or others?

September: On Friendship and ConnectionSeptember 7The art of listening and conversing and truly hearing one another is a critical aspect of what makes us human. It’s a major component of how we begin, nurture, and continue relationships. At the root of almost every friendship, marriage, or familial relationship that has ended is the erosion or complete breakdown of communication. This may lead to other events that completely sever the ties, but this is where it starts to fracture.So perhaps one of the greatest compliments you can ever receive or give, is someone truly listening and attending to your thoughts, and you doing the same for them. One of the best ways to listen to someone is to just let them speak and actually listen.Reflection title: Hey! Listen!Creative inspiration: Henry David Thoreau, Life Without PrincipleReflection question: How are my listening skills? Am I attentive, or am I just waiting for my turn to speak? How about those closest friends of mine? Are we actually listening to each other?

September: On Friendship and ConnectionSeptember 6Companionship, where it is most profound and in its most natural state, is in the silence. The quiet moments—sitting together in a car on a long drive, sitting at the table over a meal or cup of coffee, walking a path in the woods or walking the block—without ever the need to speak or fill the air for fear of silence.In its most natural state, friendship is presence. It knows that words and touch and busying ourselves with activities, while all nice, are not necessary. Do not feel the need or pressure to talk and push out the quiet. Be present with another. Let the silence out. Just be, and feel it warm you.Reflection title: Sit With the SilenceCreative inspiration: Stephen Crane, "The Open Boat"Reflection question: Who can I sit with in silence, and when did we last? Do I feel uncomfortable in silence with another? If so, why might that be?

September: On Friendship and ConnectionSeptember 5Maybe it’s that your memory has altered and obscured the events of your past, trimmed the edges or punched holes through the middles to fit the shape of the puzzle you’re placing them into. That’s likely it. Not a bad thing. We all do it. It’s how we grow and get by. But what if someone saw the real truth of you? Saw through those lies you tell yourself that are really truths, but only to you? And what if they loved you for all of those truths and half truths and lies nonetheless? Could you drop it all, shedding it from your shoulders like a cloak and sit naked and vulnerable before them while they painted you—the real you?Who would that person be?What would that painting look like?Reflection title: The Way You Really AreCreative inspiration: XenogearsReflection question: Who could paint me the way I really am? What would that painting look like? Do I even know what the real me looks like?

September: On Friendship and ConnectionSeptember 4I’ve learned to not only accept that friendships ending is a part of life, but also to love it. Amor fati, am I right? We’re all waves in the big ocean of humanity. Some of us cross paths for a brief time, and for whatever reason, we continue on our separate ways, carried by the currents. And some of those waves collide, making a single larger wave that stays together for longer periods of time—sometimes until death. No matter how long or short they last, friendships change you. Each in some way has contributed or still does contribute to the person you are right now in this very moment. So even if it has ended, enjoy the fact that it existed. Take the happy and sad moments with you. Friendships, the long and short of them, are never for nothing. They’re just a natural and beautiful part of what it means to be human.Reflection title: You Can Go Your Own WayCreative inspiration: blink-182, "Lemmings"Reflection question: What friendships have ended in my life? What have I learned from their forming and ending? How have they changed me?

September: On Friendship and ConnectionSeptember 3While it’s an interesting exercise to reflect on the precise moment a friendship forms and why it forms—those commonalities or shared events—I don’t think that’s very important at all in the scheme of things. I think what’s more important is the fact that they ever formed in the first place . . . and that they lasted . . . or maybe even didn’t last.Friends come and go. There’s nothing wrong with that. You don’t have enough time or energy to remain close with every friend you've ever had. But count yourself fortunate for having those you do have while you have them . . . and for those you did have while you had them.And certainly be grateful for the friends who are with you for the long haul.Reflection title: “Why” Is Less Important Than “It Did”Creative inspiration: Ray Bradbury, Fahrenheit 451Reflection question: What is the status of my friendships currently? Who is my best friend, and when did that journey of friendship begin? Can I pinpoint the exact moment? Does it even matter?

September: On Friendship and ConnectionSeptember 2The princess takes the seraph’s hand and without speaking, they sit in the field. The goldenrod and asters and wild carrot bloom and die around them and then bloom and die again and so do these travelers in the field, because things like Life and Death have no place here—Time sees to that. Because what else might they be up to existing and not existing within that ramshackle hut of theirs and pruning away in their garden of strange fruit? The angel and princess shift from sitting to lying down and the young grass is their bed for the time being. They look up and close their eyes. The wind. The waves. The rustling of greens and yellows and pinks. The memories of their old lives have melted away long before they arrived. Right and wrong, past and present, and future and language make no sense here. They don’t have to when the princess and the seraph are together.Reflection title: The Princess and the SeraphCreative inspiration: Jelaluddin Rumi, “A Great Wagon”Reflection question: Is there one in my life with whom I can lie in a field and just be? Or, what are my thoughts about these dualities the world is so full of talking about?

September: On Friendship and ConnectionSeptember 1It is beautiful, yes, but remember—and I must remind myself of this very often—friendship and companionship are indeed like plants that need nurturing. They are not the hearty wild onion or thistle that can spring up and stand strong in both deluge and drought. These relationships need checking in on, good soil, sunlight, pruning. As I’m sure you know, they will die without them. So find those relationships in which you will and want to form excessively strong attachments and roots. Do not love those people by halves. And watch the fruit ripen and eat of its sweetness.Reflection title: A Strange and Beautiful FruitCreative inspiration: Jane Austen, Northanger AbbeyReflection question: Who are those in my life I am not loving by halves, but by whole? Am I in need of further friendship or is my cup sufficiently full?

August: On Wonder and AweAugust 31We are a part of these wild and beautiful things contained on Earth. We are fortunate to have developed consciousness and to be able to recognize the life and wonder around us. We are privileged to breathe this air and cultivate this land and to work with the animals and each other to survive. And we have the privilege of looking up at the stars, those beautiful blinking things that, if you’re lucky, come out at night where you are and shake you to the core just upon opening your eyes, going outside, and looking up.How fortunate you are to be where you are, to be who you are, and to live with all of the creatures of Earth and to be able to gaze up with them at the forget-me-nots of the angels, sprawled across the infinite meadows of heaven.Reflection title: A Strange, Alien, and Beautiful WorldCreative inspiration: Henry Wadsworth Longfellow, "Evangeline: A Tale of Acadie"Reflection question: When have I last counted myself fortunate to be alive and to look up at the stars? When did I last take a breath and just . . . look up at night or before the sun has risen?

August: On Wonder and AweAugust 30It might sound like nothing, but there in that moment, under the blue sky, warm in the sun, the sound of water from the creek not far off, and the scent of that beautiful plant . . . it was everything. If only for a moment. And following that moment, I couldn’t help but feel I just experienced awe. Wonder at being present at the exact time and place where everything from the sun to the plant to the wind to the creek had to happen just so, and how fortunate I was to witness it all and be a part of it all.I thought this would be nice to reflect on for the book, then I also thought, is there a poem about the scent of basil reaching you under a blue sky in late summer as you prepare to water the plants? I didn’t even bother searching, I just wrote my own. And I’d encourage you to do the same the next time you experience awe.Reflection title: All at OnceCreative inspiration: Eastin DeVerna, The Everyday HumanReflection question: When did I last experience awe? The poem I’ll write about it is . . .

August: On Wonder and AweAugust 29We’re humans, not gods! We aren’t meant to be all-knowing. Part of the fun of life is not knowing and then learning and discovering. What is more thrilling than trying so damn hard to learn something, whether from a book or in physical practice, and then failing over and over and over again until one day, it finally clicks. And you can say, Eureka! I’ve got it! I learned the sonnuvabitch! It’s a beautiful feeling, and an addictive one at that. So, yes, we know some things, but really, we know nothing, and that’s a beautiful thing as long we never stop striving to know more.Reflection title: I Know That I Know NothingCreative inspiration: Plato, The Apology of SocratesReflection question: Have I yet admitted to myself that I know that I know nothing? What would I like to know next?

August: On Wonder and AweAugust 28Moments of wonder and awe bring us into a sort of perfect stillness (at least internally). They force us into the present moment, however long it may last, and they help us concentrate on living, ironically, perhaps, by forcing us to focus on something that usually transcends life. Wonder and awe steal you away from hopes or fears, anxiety or contentedness, happiness or anger. They strip you of your worldly worries and wash you of the mud of existence, leaving your soul bare and exposed to the universe which birthed you.Yes, for now, at least, I believe that experiencing wonder and awe is to truly live and be pushed into the present—and to be at peace with the spirit within you.(And don’t forget to regularly change your smoke detector batteries!)Reflection title: Pushed Into the PresentCreative inspiration:  Marcus Aurelius, MeditationsReflection question: When was the last time I felt at peace with the spirit within me? When was I truly living in the present moment, so much so that I wasn’t even aware of it?

August: On Wonder and AweAugust 27And then there’s the odd uneven times in between—I believe this is where humans fit best. We are transitory creatures by nature and so it is the days when nature herself has yet to decide what she wants to be and so becomes a little bit of everything that we feel most at home. This is a touchpoint in us as we are shapeshifters in our appearance from infant to adult to elder. In how we march from vibrance in morning to content in midday to pensive in the evening. In how we change emotions like masks, sometimes from one moment to the next. As nature dances between cool and hot, wet and dry, we move in step between young and old, happy and sad, angry and joyful.It is no wonder we humans are the way we are—odd and uneven—when we are born of nature and of the seasons.Reflection title: The Odd and Uneven Human Creative inspiration:  Sylvia Plath, The Unabridged Journals of Sylvia PlathReflection question: Which season, or rather which odd and uneven seasonal transition, inspires wonder in me? Which is a reflection of me at this time in my life?

This reflection or musing is not a part of our regularly scheduled programming. Think of it as a bonus. Bridges are necessary. You cannot get from point a to point b without them. And our lives are filled with bridges that MUST be crossed. What’s the alternative? Going back to where you came from? Not an option. The traffic of life goes one way. Stay there on the bridge forever? If you want to be stuck in place or run over by all those moving past you, sure, but who wants that?  Certainly not me and certainly not you. Embrace the bridge for what it is. Necessary, somewhat scary perhaps, but also beautiful. Sometimes they’re the only way to get where you’re going.

August: On Wonder and AweAugust 26Music was a trusted companion through many challenging times, and it was right there with me through some of the best times as well. It is an alchemy of sorts. It has the ability to change your mood from somber to happy or slow and lethargic to energized. It inspires movement. It inspires thought. It gives us chills and moves us to tears. It brings people together in ways that nothing else can. Pack hundreds of thousands of human beings into a stadium to listen to another single human or group of humans make sounds with their vocal chords and hands? What a thought!It is one of the most deeply human and awe-inspiring things. It is a language of expression in its own right. Different from speech, from body language, from any other form of communication or emotional proclamation.Now, I’m going to go pick up that guitar in my office that I can’t play very well, but that I play nonetheless because it makes me happy. How about you?Reflection title: Confessions of a Music AddictCreative inspiration:  Victor Hugo, William Shakespeare Reflection question: What is my relationship with music? When has it moved my body and spirit, and when has it moved me to tears?

August: On Wonder and AweAugust 25Lose yourself in the stars and the thought of how miniscule you are in the vastness of the universe. Lose yourself in the thought that you are but one soul among billions trying to make it just as you are in a mischievous and mercurial world. Be shattered by the magnitude of the mountains and lose your mind contemplating the vastness and mystery of the sea. But don’t forget to turn away when you’ve had enough. Don’t forget to, when you need to, shut out the immensity in a quiet room by a fire.Reflection title: The Antidote for AweCreative inspiration:  J.R.R. Tolkien, The Return of the KingReflection question: Have I lost myself in wonder and awe to the point of feeling too insignificant? Do I need to ground myself once in a while and remember that while I am small, my life is still mine and still matters?

August: On Wonder and AweAugust 24They sit in the pews of Sagrada Família, looking up at the cavernous, intricate ceiling and stained-glass windows.“Do you know when construction began on this basilica?”“I don’t know.”“Antoni Gaudí began construction here in 1882 and since then—”“Do you know the reason for it all?” says the know-nothing.“Well, it was inspired by a bookseller named—” replies the know-it-all.“No,” says the know-nothing. “Not of this place. Of it all. Do you know the reason for it all? The purpose behind it. The why. The answer to the big question.”“Ah,” says the know-it-all, thinking for a moment. “I’m afraid I don’t know.”“Me neither,” says the know-nothing. “But this seems a good enough reason.”“What’s that?”“To sit here, looking up at this ceiling”—and then a smile—”with you.”“Ah,” says the know-it-all. “I think so, too.”Reflection title: Don’t Be Afraid To Don’t KnowCreative inspiration:  Mark Twain, The Man Behind the HumorReflection question: Am I afraid to admit that I don’t know sometimes? Am I always seeking an answer? Or am I gratified to admit that I don’t know something?

August: On Wonder and AweAugust 23Awe is a double-edged sword. In a way, it satisfies us. Certain types of it (for there are many, and not all must be grand and induced by nature) allow us to proclaim that we were there, as Crane’s man did. It allows us to declare that we scaled the mountain, sailed the ocean, or reached the stars. But with that elevation, we are humbled. It shines a light on our flaws, our pettiness, our smallness—bringing us awareness. And then it dissolves us like salt thrown into boiling water, and we relish it, for knowingly or not, that is what we seek: to feel ourselves elevated in one moment like gods looking down upon their creations, and then obliterated into nothingness the next. We can never be just one thing. But that’s not a bad thing—it’s a very human thing.Reflection title: Raise Me Up and Cut Me DownCreative inspiration:  Robert Macfarlane, Mountains of the Mind: A History of a FascinationReflection question: What awe-inspiring event in my life raised me up in one moment and then cut me down in the next? Am I aware of these dueling feelings brought about by the same experience?

August: On Wonder and AweAugust 22I step up onto the seat now, looking into the ocean. Slate gray, some blue. I have no idea how deep it is—maybe anywhere from 30 to 50 to 80 feet out this far. And I have no idea what lurks below those waves, but my mind likes to guess at it. Fish, sharks, squid, dolphins, plenty of jellyfish, maybe whales, maybe . . . a kraken. Every true adventurer of the sea has to encounter the mythical beast at least once, right?I don’t know how long my mind wanders as I watch the rollers and stare into the depths, but there’s something mesmerizing about it. Something that calls you to it. Maybe it’s something to do with the fact that both humans and Earth are about 70% water. Maybe it’s the salt in our blood and sweat looking for their cousin in the ocean. Maybe it’s the mystery and danger. So vast and powerful, deadly and beautiful. The life it gives, and the countless lives it's taken since we first felt compelled to return to it.Someone back on the stern calls to me, asking if I want to eat. But I just take off my shirt and step off the bow. The water is a shock, cold and clean. Creatures swim below me.And so I swim, filled with wonder and awe and terror and joy. Filled with life.Reflection title: Do You Long for the Secret of the Sea?Creative inspiration:  Henry Wadsworth Longfellow, "The Secret of the Sea"Reflection question: When did I last ponder the secret of the sea? Does it inspire me? Terrify me? Both?

August: On Wonder and AweAugust 21It’s an extraordinary little universe back in that compost pile. The cycling of life and death, the plants beginning their lives there as sprouts to one day venture out into the big, wide garden where they will fulfill their purpose, die, and then return to the place they came. As I work the compost, watching the worms and wasps and flies do their work, and as I sift through the seedlings, I wonder where the atoms that those seeds and sprouts and plants are made up of have been and what they’ve seen. I wonder at the other lives they’ve lived.And as I transplant the sprouts to the garden, I wonder where the atoms which make up you and me have been and what they’ve seen across the universe. I imagine their journey started loud and violent, but as they went, it became quiet and beautiful.Reflection title: The Compost UniverseCreative inspiration:  Carl Sagan, CosmosReflection question: Have I considered how small I am—and for how long the matter which I am made of has existed? What does it say about my time here now—my problems, hopes, and dreams?

August: On Wonder and AweAugust 20You have to imagine. You have to envision in your mind how you would live in different circumstances. How you would live if you had more time to do the things that mattered most to you. How you would live if you could spend more time in nature, standing still in the middle of the day watching a butterfly until it flew off into the sky. How you would live with more time to share with your partner, kids, friends—laughing, smiling, dancing, crying—doing the real human stuff.That’s the first step. Seeing it is great, but it’s not enough. So next you’ve got to plan. Get a notebook. Get up early, move your body a little, make a pot of coffee, and get to thinking. Get to writing down those thoughts. Paint the picture of the life you want and figure out what the first step is to getting there. Making a plan with your partner? Going back to school? Quitting your job? Remembering what it is you’re passionate about and what is essential and making that your true north?If you could do it—if you can imagine and then build it—how would you live then?Reflection title: Well, How Would You?Creative inspiration:  Mary Oliver, "How Would You Live Then?"Reflection question: Let me imagine the improvement (or improvements) I want to make in my life. What’s the first step I need to take to get there?

August: On Wonder and AweAugust 19Reading the fantasy stories of Jacques’ Redwall, Tolkien’s Hobbit and Lord of the Rings, Martin’s A Song of Ice and Fire, Haydon’s Symphony of Ages, and countless comic books, stole me away from a life that I sometimes did not wish to inhabit, and thrust me into fantastical worlds and realms with magic, sorcery, powers, heroes, villains, and breathtaking landscapes. As I was reading these stories, I became other people. The young boy from Amityville became a holy knight of Redwall Abbey, a brave and humble hobbit from the Shire, a stoic bastard son of nobility from Winterfell, or a roguish card-slinging mutant from Louisiana. Living these lives gave me a break from my own. Like for so many people, they allowed me time to breathe, to step away from the yelling and the violence, from the schoolwork and the bullies. They brought me to places I never could have imagined. They shocked me with the unthinkable evils enacted by villains, and they widened my eyes and dropped my jaw with the brave and selfless and noble deeds of the heroes. They filled my young mind (and now my 40-year-old mind) with wonder.Read every chance you get. It’s wonderful to take in stories through other media, but reading is something special in its own right. It’s a deeply human thing sending another’s thoughts directly into your brain, and it’s one of our superpowers—granting us the ability to live another life, to inhabit other worlds, and to learn so much about others and ourselves in doing so. Reflection title: Worlds Are WaitingCreative inspiration:  George R.R. Martin, A Dance with DragonsReflection question: What lives have I lived through reading? How has it helped me? Can I forgo other uses of time like television and social media to read more?

August: On Wonder and AweAugust 18It’s not the spoon that brings out the flavor, is it? The flavor is in the sauce itself, in each and every ingredient that comes together to make a single, solitary entity. The spoon just gives it a gentle nudge to bring it all out and push it toward something beautiful.And just so, the capacity for wonder and awe is within us all. I can’t quite say what it is, and words don’t seem adequate to describe it (as with many other things, emotions in particular), but it’s there.And lucky for us, we’re in a world full of spoons that are just waiting to stir our souls.Reflection title: A Pinch of Stars, a Pinch of SeaCreative inspiration:  Meindert DeJong, The Little Cow and the TurtleReflection question: What stirs the wonder in me? Is it the stars, the mountains, the river, the oceans, the animals, or other humans and their creations?

August: On Wonder and AweAugust 17“The danger!”“The danger, yes—that’s real, but I would also venture to say the business of love. I love her, Darrel. And something happens . . . once you step off the last leaf of your flower here. Your eyes open up to it all: the beauty, wonder, and yes, the danger, but no matter how hard you try . . . you can’t shut them again. Because the ground is out there, and it’s calling.”“The ground, eh?”“The ground.”“Hmph. I still think it’s dangerous.”Reflection title: Do You Know About the Ground?Creative inspiration:  Terry Pratchett, Wings Reflection question: Have I dared to venture down onto the “ground,” or have I been holing up in my flower? And if I’ve gone, what beauty, wonder, and danger have I seen? What life have I experienced? If I haven’t, what life would I like to experience?

August: On Wonder and AweAugust 16That smile on his face at the wonder of its impossible existence.Would I trade that for an image or idea of something I’ve never seen?Something I might believe others had, or have?Or will I hold it, cherish it, protect it——because it is more than just an old photograph.More than a deceased idea from a dead world.So much more.In that it is real.Reflection title: Ain’t a Thing GreenCreative inspiration:  Eastin DeVerna, Dead World: A Post-Apocalyptic TaleReflection question: Am I reserving wonder for an idea—something I hold only in mind or something out there? Or am I spending it on the things and those around me?

August: On Wonder and AweAugust 15To stand before art is not just to behold its beauty and feel the emotions stirring within you, it is also to marvel at the fact that another human, likely in another time and another place, created something so special and beautiful, and to feel like it exists almost solely for you—while knowing it exists for every other human who experiences it.Consider art for its own sake. Consider it for the human who created it. Consider it for the feelings and thoughts it creates in your soul and mind.And enjoy it, because it is perhaps one of the most human things about us.Reflection title: That It Even Exists Creative inspiration:  Sarah J. Maas, A Court of Thorns and RosesReflection question: What piece of art last moved me? What art am I creating that might one day move someone else?

August: On Wonder and AweAugust 14Look at the mountain from the bottom of a field and you will know what it feels like to be an ant. Look at the doe cleaning her fawn in the glade toward the peak and you will know that love and care transcend humanity.Take the time to see the mountain from afar and from up close—as a part of it.Take the time to see your loved ones, the world, and everything in it through eyes of mystery and scale, empathy and credence, and wonder and awe.Reflection title: Take the Time, Take the TimeCreative inspiration:  Anthony Doerr, Four Seasons in Rome: On Twins, Insomnia, and the Biggest Funeral in the History of the WorldReflection question: Am I looking at things from a single perspective? Am I stepping back to see the scale? Am I moving closer to understand?

August: On Wonder and AweAugust 13It’s getting more difficult to find unexplored and mysterious lands in this world, but there is much still unfathomed by you as an individual. There is so much you haven’t seen and do not understand, and luckily, there always will be. Leave the stale air and artificial light behind. Leave the news and incessant chattering, those ear worms of social media and the impulse to check every text and email, every notification buzzing away in your pocket. The mundane and the horrible have existed on Earth for as long as humans have, but to survive them, we must remain children of the wild and of wonder.Reflection title: The Tonic of Wild and WonderCreative inspiration:  Henry David Thoreau, Walden: Or, Life in the WoodsReflection question: When did I last find wonder in the wild? When did I last reject the gold-plated snares of modern life and instead embrace the wonder of the mountains and oceans?

August: On Wonder and AweAugust 12Most everything we exist beside in the modern world (manmade stuff at least) is screaming in your face and waving its arms around jumping up and down, demanding information or attention or even answers from you. Wonder on the other hand, makes one simple request of you: it asks that you exist in the moment and in the stillness and silence of your mind, simply experiencing your existence as a human being . . . without the noise.Easy to come by? Hardly. And it only seems to be getting more elusive by the day. But it’s not out of reach. And you don’t have to travel to the most remote regions of the planet to find it either. You can find it in your backyard garden. If you don’t have a backyard garden, you can find it on your apartment balcony. If you don’t have an apartment balcony, you can find it at your kitchen table. If you don’t have a kitchen table, you can find it outside in the sky above your head. The point is, you can find this internal silence anywhere. But you’ll have to be smart about it. Set time aside. Turn off your phone, computer, and TV. Tune out the voices in your mind, and let your mind wander into wonder. It will take a few tries to get it right, but oh my, some time away from this noisy world is well worth the effort.Reflection title: A Noisy World, IndeedCreative inspiration:  Fred Rogers, Remembering Mr. Rogers (Interview with Charlie Rose)Reflection question: When did I last find wonder in silence? Am I able to tune out the noise and the voices? How will I do this?

August: On Wonder and AweAugust 11Working outside, among the wonder of nature and the plants, has taught me that what I perceived to be good for me (less bugs and pristine leaves), is not good for nature or the world, and thus not good for me because I am a part of that world, not some entity existing outside of it. I have learned to share. How many tomatoes can I actually eat? How many zucchini can a family stomach over the course of three months? You can get creative with your recipes, but still . . .Watching the plants grow and then watching the animals and insects build an ecosystem around them, brings with it a sense of awe and humility. That is if you allow it to. If you abandon your arrogance and stand in awe of it.The natural order of things has been happening long before I was ever here, and if I have anything to say about it, it will continue happening long after I am gone.Reflection title: The Cabbage Loopers Must Eat TooCreative inspiration:  Wendell Berry, The Long-Legged House, “A Native Hill”Reflection question: Am standing in awe of the natural order of things—for there is an order—even if it appears chaotic? Have I abandoned my arrogance, and am I working with the wonder of nature and not against it?

August: On Wonder and AweAugust 10Experiencing a sea change is like climbing out of a dark cave and seeing the light of the sun on each blade of grass, stopping to recognize a smile on a loved one’s (or even a stranger’s) face, having patience and reverence for each stage of a flower from young bud to full bloom—and then applying all of this to your daily life. And this isn’t to say that life is perfect for any of these characters or people who undergo this metamorphosis—it’s just that there is a new respect and sense of awe, an added boon of resilience and determination for life and nature and those with them along for the ride.And the wonderful thing about a sea change is that it can happen at any time—by land or by sea. Yes, they often are the result of a life-changing event, but they don’t have to be. Anyone can just wake up one morning and decide it’s time for a change.Reflection title: By Land or by SeaCreative inspiration:  Eastin DeVerna, Lux: From the Kingdom of DarknessReflection question: Have I undergone a sea change, and am I seeing the world in a new light as a result? Or am I due for a sea change?

August: On Wonder and AweAugust 9And then, there are the moments of the in-between.In thinking about this quote from A Tree Grows in Brooklyn, I don’t know if it’s possible to look at everything through the lens of the first or last time. Or even if we should. These moments are special for the simple fact that they are the first and the last. And those moments in between—they might not be the most significant, or even significant at all, but they too are moments in the bigger story of our life. They each have their own purpose, even if it's simply to sit idly, looking out the window of a car on a rainy day, or to sit at your desk and muse over a quote for the 221st time that year, or to climb into your bed once again on the night of your 40th birthday.All the moments—the firsts, the lasts, the in-betweens—what’s important about them all is that you’re present for them, because before you know it, there won’t be any firsts, lasts, or in-betweens left.Reflection title: The Alpha, the Omega, and Everything in BetweenCreative inspiration:  Betty Smith, A Tree Grows in BrooklynReflection question: Am I being truly present and acknowledging the firsts, the lasts, and those moments in between?

August: On Wonder and AweAugust 8What do we stand to lose still—those things that once taken, cannot be put back or made right again?We stand on the precipice of losing so muchand adding to the pile of bones.Reflection title: How Much More Can We Stand To Lose?Creative inspiration:  Cormac McCarthy, The RoadReflection question: What am I doing on a daily basis to cultivate and preserve the wonder in me and in the world?

August: On Wonder and AweAugust 7So long as man worships money and power (and when has he not?), I'm afraid we will only move further and further into this ersatz life. But that is a bit defeatist of me, isn’t it? There wasn’t a cure nearly a century ago, and there isn’t one today. But if you look hard enough, you can find others who refuse to enter into that false life, too. You can find those who are fighting for the future, for us, and for nature. You can find those who embody those wholesome emotions of wonder and humility. Those who stop to watch the stars and help others without looking for a reward in return. Today, I, like Carson in 1952, am convinced that there has never been a greater need for the reporter of the natural world. And they are out there. You just have to find them, join with them, and be one of them.Reflection title: Beware: Ersatz Life AheadCreative inspiration:  Rachel Carson, Lost Woods: The Discovered Writing of Rachel CarsonReflection question: When have I fallen into the trap of the ersatz life? Am I practicing the wholesome emotions of wonder and humility to avoid falling into it again? Can I be a reporter of the natural world?

August: On Wonder and AweAugust 6With the walking—the movement—your body slowly awakens, shaking off the rust of stagnancy. The tunnel vision you experienced moments before opens with the sky, broadening your perspective, sharpening your ideas, revitalizing your thinking. Oh, and very important, do this without a screen. Leave your phone home, or at the very least, leave it in your pocket or bag. If you wear a smartwatch, take it off. Why step outside into the wide and beautiful world to narrow your mind with social media or news or the constant drain of notifications?You can lose yourself in the time spent moving, forgetting the stress and the problems that you felt so mired in before stepping out. You’ll see them anew and think, What was I so worried about? How did I not see past that? And then make it a habit. Build the time to walk and move into your schedule like making your morning coffee and brushing your teeth. Don’t wait until it’s too late like I did today. You’ll be better for it.Now, I’m off to take a walk.Reflection title: Take a Long WalkCreative inspiration:  Frédéric Gros, A Philosophy of WalkingReflection question: When was the last time I lost myself on a walk? Do I have movement scheduled into my work and daily routines?

August: On Wonder and AweAugust 5When you’ve built a life you enjoy and have fallen in love with your routine, it’s good to stick to it. But too much of anything—even good things—can wear on you. It can become a sort of anaesthesia and numb you to life. That’s where looking at the world in unfamiliar ways comes into play. And it doesn’t have to mean looking at all new things, either. You don’t have to travel to new places and speak to new people (although this is wonderful, too). It just means adopting a new perspective, figuratively or literally—getting down on the ground to look at the small creatures and plants, looking away from your phone on a walk and up at the sky instead to see the clouds moving and the birds traveling to their next mysterious destination, or imagining what life might be like for the stranger you met at the store the other day or the person driving in the car next to you. It means intentionally viewing your moment to moment and day to day with fresh eyes and in a new light.See that ant marching through your driveway? Take a walk with it and see where it goes. At the bookshop again? Why not bypass your favorite section (fantasy, duh) and head to historical fiction for a change? Watch the dragonfly hunt with its lethal, near-perfect efficiency and consider how it began its life submerged in a nearby creek or pond, only to crawl out, molt its skin, and take to the sky.There are endless ways to view the familiar with unfamiliarity. And it’s not even difficult. Just get up, get outside, slow down, let your mind wander, and let it happen.Reflection title: Mind Wanderer’s LaneCreative inspiration:  Richard Dawkins, Unweaving the Rainbow: Science, Delusion and the Appetite for WonderReflection question: What is familiar in my life that I can apply an unfamiliar lens to? When did I last break up the routine? Is it time to change things up a bit?

August: On Wonder and AweAugust 4It is a wasteland and the hollow wind and the bones and corpses of what once was chills you to your core. You turn to leave, but before you go, you see something pierce through the seemingly eternal monochrome of these deadlands. A bit of green, blue, yellow, pink, purple—poking through the wasted soil. The rainbow-colored sprout of the seed of an idea, waiting for the light of inspiration and the nourishment of collaboration, ready to blossom into a poem, a song, a story, a painting, a sculpture, or an afternoon of play with one who still carries the fire.It’s never too late to come back from the wastes. You just have to look beyond what’s in front of you, shut out the noise of those who would hold you back . . . and imagine.Reflection title: Look for the SeedCreative inspiration:  Youth Lagoon, "17"Reflection question: When did I last imagine? What will I dream up next?

August: On Wonder and AweAugust 3It’s in the dark shadows of the universe—the unknown worlds that revolve around the stars we see at night, the wonder that comes with watching a bagworm stick its head out of its cocoon and work its way down the branch of a cypress tree, or the moment of self discovery while walking alone on a quiet path in the park before the world wakes. It’s these places and times that questions arise—questions about anything, like what sort of life might have evolved all those lightyears away, and are they looking at our sun as their star, wondering the same? Why does the bagworm prefer pines to deciduous trees? And what am I really doing here, on this planet, in this moment? Who was I yesterday? Who am I today? Who will I be tomorrow?There may or may not be answers to these questions. We don’t need answers to these questions. In fact, it’s okay to never know, and more than that—it’s good to never know.As humans, we aren’t meant to know it all. But we are meant to wonder at the mystery of it all. That’s what we’re good at. That is our human superpower. Reflection title: A Human SuperpowerCreative inspiration:  Albert Einstein, Ideas and OpinionsReflection question: What mystery have I found and embraced recently? Am I being too quick in looking for answers or taking a shortcut around the process?

August: On Wonder and AweAugust 2If you look at my social media feed, you’ll come across close-up shots or videos of butterflies and bees and snowberry clearwings (when they stay still long enough for me to get a shot). And for every 15-second video of those wonderful creatures, there are hours of my life spent standing among the flowers that I am fortunate and grateful to grow in my yard, just watching them flutter about from flower to flower and these beautiful and strange little creatures never are questioning their identity, never are unsure of their purpose, and never are wanting more than the short lives they’ve been granted.These moments, taken out of a busy day of worry and work, are ones that fill me with wonder and awe. There is so much to be learned from these little gentle beings we share the planet with, if we only slow down, stop for a while, and listen to the hum of their voices.Reflection title: Stop and Smell the RosesCreative inspiration:  Mary Oliver, "Hum"Reflection question: Am I slowing down to find awe in the little living things of this world? What can I learn from them? What have I learned from them?

August: On Wonder and AweAugust 1July, the month of On Family is over at the Everyday Human. Family—what a beautiful and complicated thing it can be.  This month, the month of August (my wife’s birthday month and mine!) will have us exploring one of my favorite topics—On Wonder and Awe. A key component of what makes being human worthwhile, interesting, and sets us apart from so many other creatures. This month, we’ll have reflections on wonder, awe, pleasure, laughter, and everything that makes life delightful and just a little bit mysterious.We’ll explore imagination, finding inspiration in the seasonal transitions, the strange sensation of being raised up by some awe-inspiring event in your life one moment and then having it cut you down and humble you in the next, the idea of a natural order of things vs chaos (or are they the same?)—and so much more.--Moments of awe do not require planning or some grand elaborate ceremony—it’s usually quite the opposite. You can find them every day in your partner or child’s smile; in a quiet moment when all is still and you can hear your own breath and heartbeat; in the rising and setting sun; in the wind moving through the leaves of the trees; or the mountains cutting across the sky in the distance—the eternal blue sky above your head. The moments are everywhere, happening all around you, probably even right now. But the thing is, you need to be aware of them. You need to recognize them. Once you do, stop and be with them for a moment, a minute—as long as you can.There is a perspective shift that comes with awe. It is a way to open your vision to see the bigger picture and to see the world beyond your immediate problems. It is a rope to pull you from your pit, and a bowl of clean water to wash off the mud of the life below.Reflection title: A Smile, a Tear, or Mountains and OceansCreative inspiration:  Marcus Aurelius, MeditationsReflection question: When did I last experience awe? How can I implement at least one moment of awe into my days moving forward?

July: On FamilyJuly 31This is a simple one. Love is what it all comes down to. It makes all the difference.It makes us who we are.And wherever you find love——you find family.Reflection title: The Root of the Tree of LifeCreative inspiration:  Fred Rogers, Won’t You Be My NeighborReflection question: How am I bringing my love into the world? How am I helping others become who they are with my love?

July: On FamilyJuly 30Out of a whole life of moments—about 2.5 billion if you count each second as a moment and live to 80—birth and death only make up for two (give or take a few). Granted, they are two very important ones. That leaves a whole lot of space in between. And in those in-between moments, you’ll of course find joy and sorrow, pain and pleasure, loss and gain—and every blend and nuance of these emotions and experiences. You’ll have high highs and low lows, and that’s all well and good. But the one thing (if you’re lucky enough to find it) that can make those moments truly special, is experiencing them with another—that person you love unconditionally and who unconditionally loves you, whoever it might be. Your world entire.Now, I understand some people have set out searching for this and feel they haven’t found it. I understand some people feel they have had it and lost it. It’s a complicated thing, no doubt about it—what isn’t in life? I guess what I want to say is that if you’ve had it and lost it, I’m glad you had it for however long. If you have it, I hope you hold on to it. And if you’re searching for it, I hope you find it. Or if you’re okay with being alone and you find happiness and contentment in yourself and in nature—that’s fine, too.I hope you find joy and peace in more than just a few of those billions of moments between birth and death.Reflection title: Billions of MomentsCreative inspiration:  Cormac McCarthy, The RoadReflection question: Who is my world entire? Who am I living out my moments with that makes it all worth it?