PODCAST · news
The Hoe Rogan Podcast
by Kristen Carney and Alli Breen
Welcome to The Hoe Rogan Podcast, where comedians Kristen Carney and Alli Breen bring the blunt-force honesty you’ve been missing. Think' The Joe Rogan Experience' but with more hair, fewer kettlebells but same amount of boob ;(Broadcasting straight from NYC, these two Northeast natives have sharp tongues, strong takes, and zero patience for performative nonsense. Whether it’s politics, pop culture, or the latest celebrity spiral, we come at it with common sense, comedic instincts, and no-holds-barred commentary.
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Ep. 15 Gavin Newsom's Wife is More Gavin Newsomy Than Gavin Newsom
This episode has everything that stinks: Mamdani lives out his rapper dreams and Auto-Tunes his speeches, Gavin Newsom buys, pretty much ALL of his OWN BOOKS, his wife expressed her similarities with inmates, Kamala is leading the polls (luckily for the Poles, she isn't leading them). We dive down corruption rabbit holes, celebrity delusion, Ozempic denial, Lena and Blake discourse, and the general feeling that we may all, in fact, be living inside the Twilight Zone, only creepier.Basically, if you’ve ever looked around and thought “is this real life or did everyone collectively lose the plot?”... you’re home with us.Grab a drink, lower your standards, and come spiral with us as we can swallow our drinks but not that "feminists" support Iran.Because at this point, politics feels like performance art, Hollywood is land of the living dead, and we’re just trying to survive a society so full of invertebrates.Join us! As they say, Alli and Kristen Misery love company! (It's our new surname!)#podcast #joeroganparody #popculture #politics #comedy #news #gavinnewsom #kamala #blakelively #lenadunhamTimestamps00:00 Intro: We’re back and still gloriously dysfunctional02:01 Episode rundown: Mum Donnie, Gavin, Kamala, corruption & celebrity chaos03:09 NYC Mayor auto-tune madness begins08:30 Idiocracy is here and apparently running for office18:31 Kamala, political double downs & pretending reality isn’t real19:36 Gavin Newsom’s wife and the chaos spiral20:06 Harvey Weinstein, ambition & Hollywood hypocrisy28:45 Nick Shirley, California corruption & government absurdity33:39 Ozempic denial, body positivity & celebrity honesty35:13 Lena Dunham, Blake Lively & pop culture delusion45:00 Howard Stern universe, Stuttering John & comedy weirdness56:30 Comedy, politics, backlash & public tribalism01:02:52 Final thoughts: retreating into Beauty and the Beast because reality is exhausting▬▬▬▬▬▬▬▬▬▬▬▬▬▬▬▬▬▬▬▬▬▬▬▬▬▬Subscribe! Comment! Share! (Exclamation points!)AND, get to know us!Instagram: @Thehoeroganpod @AlliBreen @ItsKristenCarneyRate and listen!Apple Podcasts: https://podcasts.apple.com/us/podcast/the-hoe-rogan-podcast/id1840041263Youtube: https://www.youtube.com/@HoeRoganPodcast
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Ep. 14 BAFTAs Outrage, Iran Hypocrisy & Epstein Island Pictures
This week on Hoe Rogan, we break down the most absurd political and cultural moments of the week — including the BAFTA Awards controversy, the growing debate around the war in Iran, and the endless cycle of internet outrage.The episode gets loud and chaotic, but the theme remains the same: everyone needs to CALM DOWN.We start with the BAFTA Awards moment involving a filmmaker with Tourette’s, which quickly turned into the internet’s latest outrage cycle. We talk about what actually happened and why social media reactions escalate faster than the facts.From there we jump into the war in Iran and the hypocrisy surrounding media coverage, including how Ayatollah Ali Khamenei has sometimes been written about surprisingly gently by Western media while American politicians with the wrong political leanings rarely receive the same courtesy.We also discuss reports that Planned Parenthood is offering cosmetic services like Botox, lip injections, and laughing gas as the organization looks for ways to offset lost funding.Then we get into the strange political theater surrounding Kristi Noem, the ongoing debate about whether she’s being fired or promoted, and why we’re not exactly losing sleep over the political future of someone who once proudly described killing her own dog.And finally we talk about Bill Clinton’s reaction to photos from Epstein’s island, including the moment he casually acknowledged that yes — interns are indeed young.Welcome to Hoe Rogan, where political commentary meets irreverent comedy.▬▬▬▬▬▬▬▬▬▬▬▬▬▬▬▬▬▬▬▬▬▬▬▬▬▬Subscribe! Comment! Share! (Exclamation points!)AND, get to know us!Instagram: @Thehoeroganpod @AlliBreen @ItsKristenCarneyX: @ThehoeroganpodRate and listen!Youtube: https://www.youtube.com/@HoeRoganPodcastApple Podcasts: https://podcasts.apple.com/us/podcast/the-hoe-rogan-podcast/id1840041263
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Ep. 13 Voter ID, Polymarket's FREE Grocery Store and the "Melania" Doc, AKA the "Melatonin" Doc
This week, we're all over the Billie Eilish and her “stolen land” commentary, of course, as well as why NOT requiring voter ID is WAY MORE racist than requiring it. Alli watched the Melania documentary so you don't have to, unless you like falling asleep during movies and Kristen rants about NYC’s Polymarket free pop-up grocery store, and why the idea it might actually work… if no one is allowed to leave.▬▬▬▬▬▬▬▬▬▬▬▬▬▬▬▬▬▬▬▬▬▬▬▬▬▬Subscribe! Comment! Share! (Exclamation points!)AND, get to know us!Instagram: @Thehoeroganpod @AlliBreen @ItsKristenCarneyX: @ThehoeroganpodRate and listen!Youtube: https://www.youtube.com/@HoeRoganPodcastApple Podcasts: https://podcasts.apple.com/us/podcast...
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Ep. 12 Be 'Good' OR Be RATIONAL?
This episode, we dive into the death and activism of Renee Good and how the media shaped her misguided "activism." We break down Hollywood’s reaction at the Golden Globes, the capture of Nicolás Maduro (yes, including the sleepwear), and the stark contrast between Venezuelans celebrating freedom and Americans bizarrely protesting in support of a dictator. Along the way, we question media outrage cycles, moral clarity, and what God might have to say about all of it.▬▬▬▬▬▬▬▬▬▬▬▬▬▬▬▬▬▬▬▬▬▬▬▬▬▬Subscribe! Comment! Share! (Exclamation points!)AND, get to know us!Instagram: @Thehoeroganpod @AlliBreen @ItsKristenCarneyX: @ThehoeroganpodRate and listen!Apple Podcasts: https://podcasts.apple.com/us/podcast...Youtube: https://youtu.be/zZ8R_hlNgTw
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Ep. 11 Bondi Terror Attack, Reiner Murders, Brown U Shooting... Just Another Week in the Life!
A dark, chaotic week in the news means we start where reality is uncomfortable - violence, death, and the stories everyone was quietly trying to process.... excepppt for Chuck Schumer. He was excited to announce the Bills beat the Patriots (lol wtf?? but also, Go Bills). We unpack the Bondi Beach attack, the Brown University shooting, and the horrifying case of Rob Reiner’s wife being murdered by their son, while asking the bigger question: what the hell is happening right now—and why does it feel relentless?From there, we pivot (because of course we do) into culture, politics, and the strange theater of it all. We debate the renaming of the Kennedy Center to the Trump Kennedy Center—and why it actually kind of works. We talk about the re-emergence of the word Christmas (yes, even in Hollywood), term limits, the “No Kings” protests, and why we showed up wearing flesh-colored shirts… which makes more sense than you’d expect.Heavy topics, sharp takes, uncomfortable laughs, and the kind of conversations you only have when the world feels slightly unhinged.Welcome back to Hoe Rogan.▬▬▬▬▬▬▬▬▬▬▬▬▬▬▬▬▬▬▬▬▬▬▬▬▬▬Subscribe! Comment! Share! (Exclamation points!)AND, get to know us!Instagram: @Thehoeroganpod @AlliBreen @ItsKristenCarneyX: @ThehoeroganpodMore ways to watch/listen!Youtube: youtube.com/@hoeroganpodcastApple Podcasts: https://podcasts.apple.com/us/podcast...
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Ep. 10 Celebs Return to Evil, Fascist USA and The "R" Word
In this week’s Hoe Rogan Podcast, we unpack a truly unhinged news cycle — starting with Ellen and Portia reportedly returning to the U.S. because of “the sunshine,” as if the sun doesn’t shine anywhere else on planet Earth. From there, we dive into more sunshine as Trump calls Waltz the “R-word”, RFK Jr.’s alleged digital affair now immortalized in book form, and a possible halt to immigration from certain third-world countries after the tragic shooting of two National Guard members in D.C. RIP SARAH BECKSTROM#trump #ellendegeneres #rfkjr ▬▬▬▬▬▬▬▬▬▬▬▬▬▬▬▬▬▬▬▬▬▬▬▬▬▬Rate and Subscribe!AND, get to know us!Instagram: @Thehoeroganpod @AlliBreen @ItsKristenCarneyTikTok: @ThehoeroganpodX: @ThehoeroganpodFind us also on!Youtube: youtube.com/@hoeroganpodcastApple Podcasts: https://podcasts.apple.com/us/podcast...
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Ep. 9 The Body Positivity Movement Has Left the Chat and Releasing the Epstein Files Has Entered
This week on Hoe Rogan, Kristen and Alli dive headfirst into the latest batch of cultural chaos:We start with Amy Schumer’s sudden weight-drop and Instagram purge, discussing how the former body-positivity cheerleader has now ghosted every old photo like she’s in witness protection. We unpack the whiplash messaging, the trends, and how celebrity “movements” always end the second they’re no longer convenient.Then we jump to Trump demanding the Epstein files be released, and what that circus would look like if it actually happened (spoiler: grab popcorn, maybe Kevlar).Next: Cheryl Hines hits The View on her book tour, freshly served to the couch like daytime TV’s newest emotional chew toy. Kristen gives a play-by-play on how fast they’ll turn on her, and Alli places bets.We also get into Michelle Obama resurfacing in the political arena, stirring up another round of national tension like it’s sweeps week, and Marjorie Taylor Greene taking a very… enthusiastic… swing at Trump, which goes exactly as well as you’d expect.Politics, celebrity contradictions, opportunism, hypocrisy, and chaos — all lovingly roasted in the Hoe Rogan way.#bodypositivity #amyschumer #epstein▬▬▬▬▬▬▬▬▬▬▬▬▬▬▬▬▬▬▬▬▬▬▬▬▬▬Rate and Subscribe!AND, get to know us!Instagram: @Thehoeroganpod @AlliBreen @ItsKristenCarneyX: @ThehoeroganpodYoutube.com/@hoeroganpodcastApple Podcasts: https://podcasts.apple.com/us/podcast...
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Ep. 8 Zohran Wins! NYC Loses!
In this episode of Hoe Rogan, we dive straight into the political circus tent we’re all living in.We kick things off with Zohran Mamdani’s big win, and the city's big loss - the perfect case study in what happens when voters don’t understand the absolute basics of economics. Then we get into the epidemic of fake politicians who talk like malfunctioning NPCs and somehow keep getting promoted.Next up: Kristen Bell manages to set the internet on fire with an Instagram post so mild it shouldn’t even qualify as content… yet it triggered half the country. Why? Because clown world.And of course, we hit everything else happening in this upside-down timeline we’re stuck in - from the word "bud" offending people to billionaire shaming from almost billionaires and all the miscellaneous stupidity in between.If you’re looking for sanity… you won’t find it here! #woke #suicidalempathy ▬▬▬▬▬▬▬▬▬▬▬▬▬▬▬▬▬▬▬▬▬▬▬▬▬▬Rate and Subscribe!AND, get to know us!Instagram: @Thehoeroganpod @AlliBreen @ItsKristenCarneyX: @ThehoeroganpodApple Podcasts: https://podcasts.apple.com/us/podcast...Youtube: https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=dGpPLorSK5I
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Ep. 7 Is The Left (at least a 'lil) Sociopathic?
Is it time to add Leftism to the DSM???This week on The Hoe Rogan Podcast, Kristen Carney and Alli Breen dig into the week’s most absurd headlines and political theater. We start with Katie Porter’s bid for California governor and the unhinged energy surrounding her campaign, then move on to Alec Baldwin’s latest excuse—claiming a garbage truck hit him—because of course he did.We also unpack Hillary Clinton’s reluctant praise for Trump over the Israeli-Gaza peace deal (was that a twitch or a smile?) and question why so many late-night “American” talk-show hosts aren’t even American—yet spend every night roasting the country they’re guests in.It all leads to a bigger, slightly uncomfortable question: has the left crossed the line from self-righteous to sociopathic? Expect sharp humor, a little chaos, and two women saying the things everyone else is thinking.▬▬▬▬▬▬▬▬▬▬▬▬▬▬▬▬▬▬▬▬▬▬▬▬▬▬Rate and Subscribe!AND, get to know us!Instagram: @Thehoeroganpod @AlliBreen @ItsKristenCarneyX: @Thehoeroganpod
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Ep. 6 The Hypocrisy of the Left is Out of Control. But, Not As Out of Control As Keith Urban's Hairdo
In this episode of Hoe Rogan, Kristen and Alli cover a week’s worth of pop culture chaos and some surprisingly sane turns. We talk about Nicole Kidman’s divorce from Keith Urban (and his unforgivable hairstyle), the Saudi Arabia Comedy Festival (yes, that’s real), and AOC’s apology to short people that somehow included more insults toward short people.We also get into the UK’s digital ID rollout possibly coming by 2029 and losing their country, Jimmy Kimmel’s sudden openness to having Trump on his show (which, let’s be real, will never happen), and the mini-meltdown over Taylor Swift’s new “trad wife” vibes.Somehow, the cultural ship seems to be steering itself sligggglthtly back toward sanity. Or maybe that’s just wishful thinking. Either way, it’s a full plate of humor, headlines, and the faintest glimmers of common sense.▬▬▬▬▬▬▬▬▬▬▬▬▬▬▬▬▬▬▬▬▬▬▬▬▬▬Rate and Subscribe!AND, get to know us!Instagram: @Thehoeroganpod @AlliBreen @ItsKristenCarneyX: @ThehoeroganpodWATCH: https://www.youtube.com/@HoeRoganPodcastApple Podcasts: https://podcasts.apple.com/us/podcast/the-hoe-rogan-podcast/id1840041263
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Ep. 5 Cluck Around and Find Out
On this episode of Hoe Rogan, Kristen opens up about the surprising — and surprisingly warm — acceptance she’s gotten from some of her pro-trans friends, and we spin off into a bigger conversation about the strange places “inclusion” and DEI show up in everyday life. From barnyard metaphors (yes, we’re talking chickens, hens, and roosters) to religion’s role in identity and community, nothing is off-limits.We also pitch our newest, absolutely-going-to-get-cancelled reality show idea: Dancing with the Cancelled Stars. Imagine your favorite “too hot for Hollywood” names back in the spotlight, cha-cha-ing their way to redemption.As always, it’s part social commentary, part comedy roast, part “did they really just say that?”▬▬▬▬▬▬▬▬▬▬▬▬▬▬▬▬▬▬▬▬▬▬▬▬▬▬Rate and Subscribe!AND, get to know us!Instagram: @Thehoeroganpod @AlliBreen @ItsKristenCarneyX: @ThehoeroganpodWATCH: https://www.youtube.com/@HoeRoganPodcastApple Podcasts: https://podcasts.apple.com/us/podcast/the-hoe-rogan-podcast/id1840041263
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Ep. 4 Keeping the 'Ass' in Assassin - The Heartbreaking Assassination of Charlie Kirk
This episode dives deep into the shocking and heartbreaking assassination of free speech advocate, family man, devout Christian, and lover of the United States—Charlie Kirk. Kristen and Alli reflect on how humanity feels like it’s losing its soul, yet in the aftermath, more hearts have been awakened than silenced. From an immigrant tearing up while watching the news to Kristen inevitably crying (as she does), the raw emotions run high.We also tackle the dangerous game of cherry-picking words out of context to fuel hatred—and why it would be super cool if people just stopped.But this episode isn’t all heavy. We detour into Near Death Experiences (where Kristen subtly tries to convert Alli into believing in an afterlife) and mourn the quiet extinction of the hotel fridge.It’s an episode that blends grief, hope, faith, and absurdity—the full spectrum of what it means to be alive right now.▬▬▬▬▬▬▬▬▬▬▬▬▬▬▬▬▬▬▬▬▬▬▬▬▬▬Get to know us!Instagram: @Thehoeroganpod @AlliBreen @ItsKristenCarneyX: @ThehoeroganpodApple Podcasts: https://podcasts.apple.com/us/podcast/the-hoe-rogan-podcast/id1840041263
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Ep. 3 That's the Way the Cracker (Barrel) Cumbles!
On this week’s Hoe Rogan, we’re taking a dive into the barrel, government overreach by pulling another "Peanut", except this time, killing someone's blind deer and penis hunting of politicians wives. We also talk about Monks throwing their support behind Trump, why jobs are the truest form of torture and authenticity being in rare supply these days.▬▬▬▬▬▬▬▬▬▬▬▬▬▬▬▬▬▬▬▬▬▬▬▬▬▬Rate and Subscribe!AND, get to know us!Instagram: @Thehoeroganpod @AlliBreen @ItsKristenCarneyX: @ThehoeroganpodWATCH: https://www.youtube.com/@HoeRoganPodcast
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Ep. 2 Losing Followers, Our Virginity and America's Sense of Humor
In episode #2, we go from dirty streets to dirty secrets. We get into cleaning up homeless encampments, our awkward virginity stories, how the 'king of all media' lost his sense of humor while ironically becoming the court jester (yes, Howard Stern comes up… again). We also talk about why ignoring facts is big-time dumb, Greg Gutfeld somehow landing on Jimmy Fallon and, more dildos!Subscribe! New episodes weekly! ▬▬▬▬▬▬▬▬▬▬▬▬▬▬▬▬▬▬▬▬▬▬▬▬▬▬Get to know usInstagram: @Thehoeroganpod @AlliBreen @KrisCarnX: @ThehoeroganpodSubscribe on Youtube! www.youtube.com/@hoeroganpodcast
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Ep. 1 Dildos, Denim and Democracy. Welcome to Hoe Rogan!
In our debut episode, we kick off The Hoe Rogan Podcast by covering the truly important issues like WNBA dildo drama, the nerve of Sydney Sweeney and American Eagle and whether Howard Stern and Stephen Colbert have officially left the building. Also, Kristen is kidding about the 'no jobs' thing. She's had jobs. She's just buried the traumatic memories of being a productive member of society. Subscribe! New episodes weekly! ▬▬▬▬▬▬▬▬▬▬▬▬▬▬▬▬▬▬▬▬▬▬▬▬▬▬Get to know usInstagram: @Thehoeroganpod @AlliBreen @KrisCarnX: @ThehoeroganpodSubscribe on Youtube! www.youtube.com/@hoeroganpodcast
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ABOUT THIS SHOW
Welcome to The Hoe Rogan Podcast, where comedians Kristen Carney and Alli Breen bring the blunt-force honesty you’ve been missing. Think' The Joe Rogan Experience' but with more hair, fewer kettlebells but same amount of boob ;(Broadcasting straight from NYC, these two Northeast natives have sharp tongues, strong takes, and zero patience for performative nonsense. Whether it’s politics, pop culture, or the latest celebrity spiral, we come at it with common sense, comedic instincts, and no-holds-barred commentary.
HOSTED BY
Kristen Carney and Alli Breen
CATEGORIES
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