The Hoely Hour

Love Island is over so please excuse this random episode while our brains recover from the past 10 weeks. After discussing the finale, we play a quick round of “guess who” to warm our brains up before Amelia asks Liz if she thinks some hot takes are caca or correct. Hosted by Simplecast, an AdsWizz company. See https://pcm.adswizz.com for information about our collection and use of personal data for advertising.

Liz explains wtf is wrong with the worst boys on Love Island, and we get a new Enemy of the Pod! Hosted by Simplecast, an AdsWizz company. See https://pcm.adswizz.com for information about our collection and use of personal data for advertising.

Amelia put her Bachelor of Science and expert Googling skills to use to explain why everyone on Love Island is losing their minds. We're also talking via Riverside which is both a godsend and the work of the devil, so please bear with us on any audio hiccups :') Hosted by Simplecast, an AdsWizz company. See https://pcm.adswizz.com for information about our collection and use of personal data for advertising.

RIP Dick Cheney, you would have hated this podcast. Amelia and Liz share a podcast update, and read and answer some Very Good Questions from an article on the Substack, "Uncynical." Hosted by Simplecast, an AdsWizz company. See https://pcm.adswizz.com for information about our collection and use of personal data for advertising.

We have had this podcast for 6 years…so we’re basically married. How well do we know each other? We also read an email about girlhood from one of you angels and we loved it and you. Hosted by Simplecast, an AdsWizz company. See https://pcm.adswizz.com for information about our collection and use of personal data for advertising.

Mr. Liz fills in for Amelia this week, and as our resident man over 30, he answers questions like if God is real and explains why mini vans are cool actually. Hosted by Simplecast, an AdsWizz company. See https://pcm.adswizz.com for information about our collection and use of personal data for advertising.

Is your sex more like paying on klarna, or are you sucking the life out of each other's mouths? We interview Dark Frank (one of Frank's friends) about his experience with tantric sex and Amelia takes the opportunity to ask him about his experience as a polyamory magnet. Hosted by Simplecast, an AdsWizz company. See https://pcm.adswizz.com for information about our collection and use of personal data for advertising.

IMPORTANT NOTE: We recorded this episode before the recent sexual assault and battery allegations brought against influencer Braden Peters, AKA Clavicular. Clavicular is brutally self-awareness-mogged by two podmaxxers! This week: who he is, why he’s infamous, and how a man can confidence-maxx his way into a full-blown public identity crisis. Hosted by Simplecast, an AdsWizz company. See https://pcm.adswizz.com for information about our collection and use of personal data for advertising.

We went back to our roots this ‘sode, y’all. We read a girlhood email from one of our angels before diving in to some sex headlines. We also briefly discuss the unsurprising and absolutely horrific online rape academy that around 63million people visited toward the end of this episode so please take care of yourselves if this is going to be triggering for you. It’s in the last 5 minutes. We love you!!! Hosted by Simplecast, an AdsWizz company. See https://pcm.adswizz.com for information about our collection and use of personal data for advertising.

We had so much to say about girlhood the first time, that we came back for more! Liz and Amelia talk about calling home phones, ringback tones, popular girls, mean girls, and girls who become life-long friends. Girlhood is lifelong! Hosted by Simplecast, an AdsWizz company. See https://pcm.adswizz.com for information about our collection and use of personal data for advertising.

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Our guest this week is Emmy Award Winning Meteorologist & News Anchor, Abby Acone! Abby reads some interesting "fan" DMs and shares about her queer awakening. Hosted by Simplecast, an AdsWizz company. See https://pcm.adswizz.com for information about our collection and use of personal data for advertising.

One of you cutie patooties wrote in asking us to talk about girlhood, and girlhood we talked about indeed. And we miss it. Also side note we were testing recording on Riverside again and safe to say that was a. mistake. Thank you for your patience with our sound issues :') Hosted by Simplecast, an AdsWizz company. See https://pcm.adswizz.com for information about our collection and use of personal data for advertising.

Liz reads Amelia read an interesting Craigslist ad, and no, it's actually weirder than you're picturing. What would you do if someone told you to "dress your age" at 30? (You should only wear a burlap sack after the age of 23 I guess.) Hosted by Simplecast, an AdsWizz company. See pcm.adswizz.com for information about our collection and use of personal data for advertising.

Wuthering is a stupid word. You know it, we know it, Margo Robbie knows it. We discuss the discource around the movie, a search engine to let you find people who look like your crush having sex, and why the straight women of the world are so hung up on Heated Rivalry. Hosted by Simplecast, an AdsWizz company. See https://pcm.adswizz.com for information about our collection and use of personal data for advertising.

We look to Reddit to see what people are asking men! Turns out they're asking men how they feel about being eternal bachelors and sharing hard-learned lessons. Did anyone see the video of that fraternity in a wet basement? Also: unsolicited relationship advice! Hosted by Simplecast, an AdsWizz company. See pcm.adswizz.com for information about our collection and use of personal data for advertising.

You’ve heard of horoscopes, but have you heard of judging people based on what role they played when they played house in preschool? We discuss what our ideal version of Heated Rivalry would be and list out what we thought was normal in our 20s that definitely wasn’t. Hosted by Simplecast, an AdsWizz company. See https://pcm.adswizz.com for information about our collection and use of personal data for advertising.

Our guest this week is comedian Alli Goldberg! Alli is the mastermind of "Love Isn't Blind," a live dating show where the men can't speak. In fact, your mom might have to speak for you... Hosted by Simplecast, an AdsWizz company. See https://pcm.adswizz.com for information about our collection and use of personal data for advertising.

The world is on fire! Everything is bad! But did you know that it’s scientifically proven that optimism and consuming good content is good for your brain? This woman’s mormon husband is addicted to porn, by the way. And Ye apologized…again. Hosted by Simplecast, an AdsWizz company. See https://pcm.adswizz.com for information about our collection and use of personal data for advertising.

A listener writes in to tell us about a date so bad, she saged her bed after. It is indeed sage-worthy. We read a few more emails and talk about de-centering age and mating habits with a scarcity mindset. Hosted by Simplecast, an AdsWizz company. See https://pcm.adswizz.com for information about our collection and use of personal data for advertising.

Amelia creates a fake scenario for Liz to get mad about and people are addicted to porn at a shocking level. What’s worse: someone calling your boyfriend “good boy” or “daddy”? It’s a house divided, and may be the first thing we've disagreed on in years. Hosted by Simplecast, an AdsWizz company. See https://pcm.adswizz.com for information about our collection and use of personal data for advertising.

Liz shares her Ins & Outs (spoiler: bangs made the list again), and Amelia shares her 2026 predictions, including bald being IN! You heard it here first! Hosted by Simplecast, an AdsWizz company. See https://pcm.adswizz.com for information about our collection and use of personal data for advertising.

WE’RE BAAAAACK! Amelia’s driving this week’s episode which means it has zero structure and we take about 3 hours to get to the actual topic. We discuss the most coo-coo bananas AITA that is so unbelievable, it might not be true…but we’re choosing to believe it is. + an update from a listener! Hosted by Simplecast, an AdsWizz company. See https://pcm.adswizz.com for information about our collection and use of personal data for advertising.

Liz and Amelia discuss dating trend predictions for 2026! Hosted by Simplecast, an AdsWizz company. See https://pcm.adswizz.com for information about our collection and use of personal data for advertising.

This might come as a shock, but we came with actual topics today and ended up talking about none of them. Listen as we discuss “shrekking”, female friendships, and the MAGA Civil War. Do you have someone that you need Liz to talk smack about? Her and the fat little opera man that lives on her shoulder are on the case. Hosted by Simplecast, an AdsWizz company. See https://pcm.adswizz.com for information about our collection and use of personal data for advertising.

PRESIDENT DJT CONFIRMED BISEXUAL! While Trump sucks off Bill Clinton, Liz and Amelia cover topics ranging from prenupts to adult circumcision. Hosted by Simplecast, an AdsWizz company. See https://pcm.adswizz.com for information about our collection and use of personal data for advertising.

You know 'em, you love 'em, Amelia is assaulting Liz's thoughts with 'em. TikTok Sexy Chefs (which is mostly one man making a coconut squirt) is back in the zeitgeist. We also discuss performative males and how the general sentiment around them has changed with the times. We also read a listener email from someone going through a brutal breakup and offer the kind of heartfelt but unlicensed wisdom that we refuse to stop giving out. Hosted by Simplecast, an AdsWizz company. See https://pcm.adswizz.com for information about our collection and use of personal data for advertising.

Article's from today's episode: The Goon Squad by Daniel Kolitz for Harper's Magazine. https://harpers.org/archive/2025/11/the-goon-squad-daniel-kolitz-porn-masturbation-loneliness/ Hosted by Simplecast, an AdsWizz company. See pcm.adswizz.com for information about our collection and use of personal data for advertising.

You read that right, folks! We love men!!! What do small gestures and small ankles have in common? They both make Amelia horny apparently. Liz thirsts over parallel parking, and people are having less sex than ever. Happy Halloween! Hosted by Simplecast, an AdsWizz company. See https://pcm.adswizz.com for information about our collection and use of personal data for advertising.

Everyone is talking about AI, including this podcast! Big tech is giving up on using AI to cure cancer and going all in on porn. People are trading in their real life relationships for their ChatGPT therapist, getting engaged with their AI boyfriends, and replacing any need for real human interaction altogether. God forbid you be inconvenienced by the arduous task of thinking! Hosted by Simplecast, an AdsWizz company. See https://pcm.adswizz.com for information about our collection and use of personal data for advertising.

AI is ruining the internet for furries, women should be bartering sexual labor for fine jewelry (Patriarchy at Tiffany's), and ovaries are really cool, it turns out. Would your brother steal your boyfriend? Spoiler alert: maybe Hosted by Simplecast, an AdsWizz company. See https://pcm.adswizz.com for information about our collection and use of personal data for advertising.

The Hoely Hour returns with a hilarious and witchy guest, Leah Knauer! We play a game of "Sex Magic or Sex Tragic?" and get a special oracle card reading from Leah! Hosted by Simplecast, an AdsWizz company. See https://pcm.adswizz.com for information about our collection and use of personal data for advertising.

It finally happened: we had the boyfriends co-host with us. They answer questions about the male loneliness epidemic, advice for couples moving in together, and what they'd bring to a deserted island. Hosted by Simplecast, an AdsWizz company. See https://pcm.adswizz.com for information about our collection and use of personal data for advertising.

OUR NUMBER ONE EPISODE OF ALL TIME! (And some updates on what's changed since then!) Hosted by Simplecast, an AdsWizz company. See https://pcm.adswizz.com for information about our collection and use of personal data for advertising.

When you jork it so good you bust a lung. Listen to a replay of our #2 top episode of all time, featuring an intro from Liz, where she reads an ad she got for a pornographic pumpkin event, and apologizes for being a Sydney Sweeney apologist. Hosted by Simplecast, an AdsWizz company. See https://pcm.adswizz.com for information about our collection and use of personal data for advertising.

Amelia interviews Frank this week and asks some questions that all women (just Amelia) are dying to know. We also discuss some penis facts that you’ll either regret not knowing before, or regret knowing now. Who’s to say! Hosted by Simplecast, an AdsWizz company. See https://pcm.adswizz.com for information about our collection and use of personal data for advertising.

Liz reintroduces our #3 episode of all time with some new updates! (Warning: you have some homework...) Hosted by Simplecast, an AdsWizz company. See https://pcm.adswizz.com for information about our collection and use of personal data for advertising.

Amelia reminisces on her all time favorite episode which is, of course, the first time she talks about Frank. Hosted by Simplecast, an AdsWizz company. See https://pcm.adswizz.com for information about our collection and use of personal data for advertising.

Girl chore or boy chore? Liz and Mr. Liz determine who should do which chores in a relationship. What's like the opposite of a dating coach? Mr. Liz details the stories of a creep he met at work the summer before he went to college who "coached" him on ways to be a predator. Hosted by Simplecast, an AdsWizz company. See https://pcm.adswizz.com for information about our collection and use of personal data for advertising.

This week, Amelia introduces our #4 top episode of all time, which is an absolute doozy of an episode. We discuss the female delusion calculator, someone bringing a child's backpack full of...things...on a date, and the importance of HPV testing along with the issues with the current testing. Hosted by Simplecast, an AdsWizz company. See https://pcm.adswizz.com for information about our collection and use of personal data for advertising.

This week, Liz reminisces on one of her favorite episodes where she regales the story of The Titanic Butt Plug Incident. Hosted by Simplecast, an AdsWizz company. See https://pcm.adswizz.com for information about our collection and use of personal data for advertising.

E235: Is watching porn cheating, or is it just a solo side quest? Speaking of cheating...there's nothing quite like getting exposed for infidelity on a jumbotron while “Fix You” plays in the background, amirite? Amelia’s also on a GLP-1 now, so buckle up for her wellness era with significantly less appetite and significantly more opinions. And we read a listener email so heartfelt it made Liz cry. How dare you (we love you). Hosted by Simplecast, an AdsWizz company. See https://pcm.adswizz.com for information about our collection and use of personal data for advertising.

E234: Amelia learns some shocking common knowledge, losers are creating AI girlfriends to abuse (fork found in kitchen), and the girls talk about the White Trash White House. Hosted by Simplecast, an AdsWizz company. See pcm.adswizz.com for information about our collection and use of personal data for advertising.

E233: What do Lauren Sanchez’s wedding dress, facial filler migration, and a cryptic “don’t freak out” phone call have in common? All of them prompt immediate panic. Liz and Amelia talk about what their friends would assume if they ever opened a conversation with “ok, don’t freak out,” the cursed details of Sanchez’s Venice wedding (including the locals not having it), and why filler might just be the new vape: overused, under-researched, and ruining your face. Hosted by Simplecast, an AdsWizz company. See https://pcm.adswizz.com for information about our collection and use of personal data for advertising.

E232: The internet is once again divided about how a woman should be, and I’m sure you can imagine hwo we feel about that. Also, Liz is starting ketamine therapy! Hosted by Simplecast, an AdsWizz company. See https://pcm.adswizz.com for information about our collection and use of personal data for advertising.

E231: Liz and Amelia recount Amelia's wild birthday weekend, hangover and all. Amelia and Liz read Reddit stories featuring a crazy gaslighter and a bridezilla (also a gaslighter), and reminisce on the insane days of TLC's early 2000's shows. Hosted by Simplecast, an AdsWizz company. See pcm.adswizz.com for information about our collection and use of personal data for advertising.

Frank bought a hat and we talk about it for the first 6 minutes. Should Sydney Sweeney be selling her bath water? Should height filters on dating apps exist? Should doctors be able to give you pelvic exams without your consent? Are we the best singers alive? Hosted by Simplecast, an AdsWizz company. See https://pcm.adswizz.com for information about our collection and use of personal data for advertising.

E229: An old episode we never released because the audio sounds like sh*t. But if you can get past that, you'll be thoughtfully entertained by an insane Reddit story about a man who discovers his wife is stalking his ex, why Jim Halpert is a Mary Sue for millennial women, and some other stuff Liz thinks about after a eating a gummy. Hosted by Simplecast, an AdsWizz company. See pcm.adswizz.com for information about our collection and use of personal data for advertising.

E228: What do sex dolls and brain dead human incubators have in common? Neither of them can consent to what is being done to them, which makes them ripe for abuse. Liz and Amelia talk about a sex doll brothel in Germany, and the horrifying details of Adriana Smith — a legally dead woman in Georgia being kept alive as a human incubator. Hosted by Simplecast, an AdsWizz company. See pcm.adswizz.com for information about our collection and use of personal data for advertising.

Celebrate the biggest Deepfake porn site — MrDeepFakes — beng shut down by giving yourself the first FDA approved at-home pap smear! How much money would you spend to switch bodies with your partner during sex? Hosted by Simplecast, an AdsWizz company. See https://pcm.adswizz.com for information about our collection and use of personal data for advertising.