PODCAST · society
The Hook Up
by triplej
The Hook Up is about love, sex and relationships. We answer your questions, learn things together, cry over heartbreak and normalise shit. Every Tuesday Dee and Pip debate your dating dilemmas and hear your cooked stories. Every Thursday it's the sex ed you never had — we call on an expert to go deep and find answers with Dee.
Episodes
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Is Masculinity Actually Under Attack?
A lot of manosphere influencers create content about how ‘masculinity is under threat’ and we’re seeing this impact how young guys are learning about what it means to be a man. So in this episode, we chat to Josh Glover from The Man Cave and Dr Jacko Jackson from The Global Institute for Women’s...
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Getting Out Of The Manosphere W/ Flynn Martin
Over the last few years, the manosphere has been a hot topic. We’ve watched investigations by doco makers, interviews with incels and pick up artists, and popular manosphere podcasters continue to go viral on social media. But what about the “red pilled” men who’ve changed their mind and come out...
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Is Abandonment A Form Of Abuse?
Alpine Divorce has been a big convo this year, with people all over the world sharing stories of a partner abandoning them in a remote or dangerous place like a hiking trail or mountain. So does someone storming off mean they need to cool down, or is it a sign of abuse? In this ep, Elisabeth Shaw...
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Alpine Divorce: When You've Been Abandoned By Your Partner
“Alpine divorce” is when someone abandons their romantic partner in a remote or dangerous outdoor setting like a hiking trail, bushwalk or mountain. The term went viral this year, and women all over the world started sharing their own stories of being left behind by their male partners in the...
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What It Means If You Like Getting Caught Or Watching People Have Sex
Over half of you told us that the idea of being caught having sex turns you on! So why are so many people into this? In this ep, Dee chats to sexologist Laura Lee to delve deep into the psychology of this kink, the ethics and nuance of consent, and the best way to live out your fantasy of…
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Do You Wanna Get Caught In The Act…?
Whether it’s the thrill of having sex with a window or door left slightly open. Maybe you fantasise about having sex in public, or being watched at a sex party. If the thought of being seen doing something private or intimate turns you on, this ep is for you. We hear your fantasises and…
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We Need To Chat About Smart Glasses and Consent
How do you feel about smart glasses? Lots of people are loving them with Meta selling millions this year, but lots of people are worried about surveillance, the potential harm, and being filmed without consent. In this ep, we chat to Dr Milly Stilinovic who’s been researching the impact of smart...
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Why Are Women Witchy Again?
While we’re past the days of witch hunts and trials, some people think there’s something magical that still lingers in our blood - some would even call it “women’s intuition”. But why are we now seeing a resurgence of modern women engaging with the spiritual and supernatural world, and reclaiming...
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No Ones Wearing Condoms Anymore And It’s A Huge Problem
Apparently condom use is at its lowest recorded level since 1992 - and it’s causing a national emergency of STI rates. So why are people avoiding the rubber? In this ep, you’ll hear about the latest research from sexual health expert Jason Ong and get advice on what to do if someone’s shaming you...
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Best Of Hook Up Guests
We’re on a little break! But we’re dipping into the archive to bring you the best moments provided by some of our favourite guests! From VERY controversial hot takes from comedians Will Gibb and Daniel Foxx, to Angela White’s sex advice on squirting and eating pussy, chatting threesomes with…
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Embracing Single When It Wasn’t What You Wanted w/ Sheree Joseph
What happens when you don't end up with the life you always dreamt of? For writer Sheree Joseph it was getting married and having kids. But after her long-term relationship ended and an unsuccessful fertility journey, she had to face a future she never expected for herself. In this chat, Sheree...
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Best Of Your Stories
We’re on a little break! But we’re dipping into the archive to bring you the best stories provided by YOU - our extremely sexy smart cool listeners! From cum-piphanies and public break ups, to pleasure dom mommy’s and meeting soulmates in the rideshare - we revisit our favourite and most…
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Investigative Journalist By Day Sex Worker By Night w/ Bension Siebert
After being made redundant from his dream job as an investigative journalist, Bension Siebert turned to sex work to make money and surprised himself by how much he enjoyed it. In this ep, Bension chats to Dee about ‘coming out’ with his new profession, the reaction online and what he’s learnt…
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“Opposites Attract” But Do They Make Good Partners?
We all know the phrase but does dating someone who’s completely different to you actually work? In this ep, we hear your stories of dating people who are opposite in lifestyle, interests and core values, compared to people who’ve dated similar - and find out if compatibility can work both ways....
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How To Heal After Heartbreak
Going through heartbreak can be one of the most painful experiences and sometimes those break up scars don’t leave - when you start dating again. So in this ep, we chat to Dr Marny Lishman about the walls we put up after being hurt, how to heal and trust in love again. SHOW NOTES: Break Up…
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What’s The Best Way To Get Over An Ex?
We can all agree that break ups are a universally shit experience, whether it’s a long term relationship or situationship. In this episode we’re unpacking all the challenges and questions you have - should you go no contact? How long should you wait before hooking up with someone new? Are my...
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The Rise Of Spicy BookTok w/ Tierney Page
There are millions of posts on TikTok all about ‘spicy books’ and someone who’s become famous for reviewing them is author and content creator Tierney Page. In this ep, she chats about why she thinks there’s been a massive rise in people reading and posting about romantasy and smut, her fav…
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Why Are We So Obsessed With Romantasy?
Whether you have or haven’t read books like Heated Rivalry, A Court of Thorns and Roses or Fourth Wing, you can’t deny the rise in smutty literature. In 2025 romantasy and sports romance experienced triple-digit growth. But there’s been some criticism around how DR and romantasy books often...
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How To Support A Loved One With Addiction
Whether it’s drugs, alcohol, or gambling - addiction can be one of the hardest things to navigate in a relationship. In this episode we chat to clinical psychologist Donna Stambulich about her experience with amphetamine addiction, the impact it has on relationships and how to best support your...
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When Your Love Life Is Affected By Gambling
What’s the bet you or someone you know has been affected by gambling? Probably pretty high. Around 3 million Australians experience some sort of gambling harm each year. And 1.2 million Australians are affected by someone else's gambling. And it can have a real impact on your dating or love life....
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Chem Sex Parties & Gay Pain w/ Fruit Fly Author Josh Silver
Who has the right to tell queer stories and profit off them? That’s the main theme author Josh Silver explores in his latest book Fruit Fly. The book follows a writer who befriends a young gay addict so she can use his story to write a best seller. In this ep, Dee chats to Josh about his own…
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Are You Worried You’re Too Vanilla In Sex?
Have you ever felt pressure to have a certain kind of sex? Sex positivity has been an incredible movement which has normalised and destigmatised adventurous, kinky and casual sex. But has that come at a cost? In this ep, we’re joined by guest co-host psychologist and sexologist Laura Lee to…
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BONUS: We've decided to stop sharing a bed (w/ Dee Salmin!)
Surprise! We've got a Saturday Bonus ep for you! You probably heard all about Ben Ilobuchi's situationship troubles in this weeks episode. But did you hear the beef? Dee becomes The Grill's first guest to sear some rogue relationship-specific beefs like ghosting, the ick, and having to sleep in a...
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How To Have The ‘What Are We?’ Chat w/ Erika Ettin
If you’re dating, hooking up with, talking to, or seeing someone but you don’t know where things are going and you don’t know how to bring it up… Dating coach and author Erika Ettin has got you! In this ep, she has some tough love for anyone in a situationship, and will help you have the...
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What The Hell Is A Situationship? And Am I In One?
Are you dating or hooking up with someone right now and you’re not really sure what’s going on? It feels like a relationship but you’ve never had the ‘exclusive chat’. You might be in a situationship… In this episode Dee is joined by guest co-host Ben Ilobuchi to unravel the relationship limbo....
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How To Stop Self-Sabotaging w/ Dr Rebecca Ray
Have you noticed a pattern in your love life of ending things when a relationship starts to get serious? Or maybe you pick a fight, or ghost people or never commit to a second date. In this ep we chat to psychologist Dr Rebecca Ray about why we can sometimes self-sabotage and how to break that...
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Is Having A Type Problematic?
Whether it’s someone’s personality, physical attributes, career or aesthetic - sometimes we lean into a “type” of person who we’re attracted to and want to date. But can it ever be discriminatory, fetishisation or limiting to potential relationships? We hear your hot takes and discuss with…
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Life As An Asexual Icon w/ Allie Daisy King
As much as we talk about sex on The Hook Up, for some people they have absolutely no interest in it. That’s what it’s like for writer, fashion girly, podcast host of Booksmart AND asexual baddie Allie Daisy King. In this ep Dee chat’s to Allie about her sexuality journey realising she was ace…
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What Are Your Relationship ‘Hacks’?
Doing the crossword together every week, writing letters to each other, mandatory date nights, surprise gifts, a commitment to a yearly getaway, and sleeping in separate beds. Whether you’re only a few months in, or years deep - we all have ways to keep the relationship vibes high and healthy. In...
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Harrison James on Love And Healing After Child Sexual Abuse
Studies show that nearly 30% of Australians have experienced child sexual abuse - a horrific stat that award-winning activist and co-founder of the #YourReferenceAintRelevant campaign - Harrison James has been trying to change. In this ep, Dee chats to Harri about his activism, his survival of...
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Is It Ok To Date Your Friend’s Ex?
Hooking up with your mate’s ex might be one of the biggest violations in a friendship. But is it totally black and white, or are there some grey areas? We hear your hot takes and stories - from you giving your blessing to friends hiding the relationship, and when pursuing the ex has damaged...
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What Is PrEP? And Should I be Taking It?
When you hear about HIV you might think of the AIDs epidemic during the 80s. But so much has changed since then, including the invention of a prevention drug called PrEP. So how does it work? And is it just for gay men? In this chat with Professor Andrew Grulich who’s the head of a HIV…
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What’s It Like To Date A Sex Worker?
They say it’s one of the oldest professions in the world, and with sites like OnlyFans booming in popularity, getting into the industry is easier than ever before - but what is it like to date someone who does sex work? We hear your experiences of dating and relationships from the POV of SWers…
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Sex, Intimacy And Disability w/ Madeleine Stewart
Over 20% of Australians live with a disability yet there’s still so much stigma and misconceptions when it comes to their sex lives. That’s something comedian and host Madeleine Stewart is trying to change in a new doco. We chat about what she’s learnt about desire and pleasure - through her own...
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Freud, Pavlov's Dog & The DSM: The Evolution Of Psychology
Did you know psychology has only existed for 147 years? For such a young science, it’s had a huge impact on humanity and how we understand relationships, from Freudian theories to the pop psych infographics we see on social media every day. So we wanted to investigate it - where psychology came...
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Why Some Men Are Threatened By Successful Women In Dating
Research shows women are out performing men in education, and are buying more houses - but at what cost to their love lives? We speak to author Stefanie O’Connell about her book The Ambition Penalty and her viral Guardian article about how more single women are buying more houses and how men…
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Is Your Partner Intimidated By Your Success?
Success looks different for everyone. Maybe you own property, or have built a great career. Maybe you’re highly educated, well travelled, creative, ambitious or wealthy. But sometimes thriving in life can impact dating and relationships. We hear your stories, particularly as women, about when…
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What You Need To Know Before You Say I Love You
Saying I love you to someone can be such a huge thing - so how do you know when you actually feel it? And when is the right time to say it? Plus how do you deal when the person you love doesn’t say it back. We answer all your questions about declaring your love with couples therapist Megan Kozak.
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When Should You Say I Love You?
These are the most feared words for any budding relationship. I Love You. Everyone's advice is always “just say it when you genuinely feel it!” which is great in theory, but hard in practice for so many reasons. In this episode we chat about the ILY timeframe, why you may or may not say it and…
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How To Deal With A Mismatch In Physical Affection
73% of you have dated someone where there’s been a mismatch of PDA in your relationship. So what can you do if one of you loves physical touch and the other doesn’t? We chat to couples therapist and sexologist Isiah McKimmie on how to navigate that mismatch, how to deal with feelings of…
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Is PDA A Sign Of Intimacy Or Is It Performative?
How do you feel about holding hands, hugging, kissing and canoodling in public? Is it cringe or cute? We hear your stories about PDA - witnessing it in the wild, when there’s been a mismatch in physical touch, and whether PDA has been lost. DM us your thoughts, questions, topics, or to just vent…
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Will AI Save Dating Apps?
People are emotionally, mentally and spiritually exhausted by dating apps, so much so that hundreds of thousands of swipers are deleting them. Now to try and “shake things up” Bumble is replacing the swipe function with AI matchmaking. We chat to Dr Raffaele Ciriello from the Uni of Sydney about...
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Is Second Puberty Real?
We’ve all been through puberty. It was sometimes traumatic, mostly awkward, it even had its endearing moments - and going through it shaped the way we think about ourselves and how we show up in the world. In this ep, you share your puberty war stories, and we investigate the mysterious…
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Advice If You’re LGBTQI+ And Live In The Country
If you’re LGBTQI+ and live rurally, it can be so hard to explore your sexuality or discover your identity, especially if you don’t have any queer community nearby. In this ep, Dee chats to psychologist Dr Chris Cheers about how to find yourself and your people - if you live in a place that makes…
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What’s It Like To Date In The Country?
Dating and relationships out bush is a pretty unique and sometimes challenging experience - everyone knows everyone’s business, you bump into casual hook ups and exes at the local pub, there’s pressure to fit the town culture and pressure to settle down with a partner even if you're incompatible....
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Reconnecting To Pleasure After Burnout, Stress or Grief
How you’re feeling emotionally has such an impact on your sex life. It can be hard to feel turned on or connect with people when you’re feeling down, stressed or just numbness from the cooked state of the world. In this ep, Dee chats to sexologist Claire Diaz about how to reconnect to pleasure...
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How We All Become Obsessed With Romantic Love
Throughout most of history, marriage wasn’t seen as something you did ‘for love’. We paired up for resources, family alliances and survival - so when did it change? In this episode, we explore the history of romantic love and how it’s changed from ancient love poems and medieval knights, to...
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What It’s Like To Have PMDD w/ Emma Hardy
PMDD (aka premenstrual dysphoric disorder) isn’t ‘just PMS’ - it can be completely debilitating and life changing. In this ep, Dee chats to debut author Emma Hardy about her new book Periodic Bitch and her experience living with it. Just a heads up we talk about suicidal ideation and depression…
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Dumping Over Text, Romantasy Smut & Mummy's Boys w/ Comedian Daniel Foxx
Daniel Foxx thinks you should break up with them over text. And that’s not the only hot take from this week's guest. Fresh off his Australian stand up tour, the UK comedian and podcaster chats the state of dating apps, his furry-fantasies and gives some of his best advice for your dating…
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Lust, Limerence and Why We Love w/ Dr Anna Machin
What's the difference between lust, limerence and love? Can love be addictive? Is romantic love technically even real? And if love is so natural to humans then why do we struggle with it? These are just a few of the questions we get answered by world renowned evolutionary anthropologist Dr Anna...
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ABOUT THIS SHOW
The Hook Up is about love, sex and relationships. We answer your questions, learn things together, cry over heartbreak and normalise shit. Every Tuesday Dee and Pip debate your dating dilemmas and hear your cooked stories. Every Thursday it's the sex ed you never had — we call on an expert to go deep and find answers with Dee.
HOSTED BY
triplej
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Frequently Asked Questions
How many episodes does The Hook Up have?
The Hook Up currently has 904 episodes available on PodParley. New episodes are automatically indexed when they're published to the podcast feed.
What is The Hook Up about?
The Hook Up is about love, sex and relationships. We answer your questions, learn things together, cry over heartbreak and normalise shit. Every Tuesday Dee and Pip debate your dating dilemmas and hear your cooked stories. Every Thursday it's the sex ed you never had — we call on an expert to go...
How often does The Hook Up release new episodes?
The Hook Up releases new episodes frequently with a large back catalog of 904 episodes. Check the episode list for recent publication dates.
Where can I listen to The Hook Up?
You can listen to The Hook Up on PodParley by clicking any episode. We provide an embedded audio player for direct listening, and you can also subscribe via your preferred podcast app using the RSS feed.
Who hosts The Hook Up?
The Hook Up is created and hosted by triplej.
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