PODCAST · tv
The Horrorists
by Beard Cave Ventures
Walter and Kevin talk about horror movies, the good, the bad, the ugly.
Episodes
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The Skin I Live In and The Watchers
Special note I did what I could with the audio, there are a few bits where it's weird. This is what happens when I let my large sons record without me. Walter returns with special fill-in host Schuyler with a double feature of films that offer the polar opposites of ambiguity. First the boys…
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When Evil Lurks
Kevin and Walter get to cleaning as they talk about the Argentine film When Evil Lurks. Kevin fears possession and Walter is a parent, so this one wreaks havoc. The movie may shock and scare, but is it worth your time? Kevin’s goat rankings certainly are. Walter is too snooty to discuss Spy x...
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Paranormal Activity
Kevin and Walter get dragged out of bed to discuss the low budget sensation of 2007, Paranormal Activity. This movie spooked the boys when it first came out but does it still have teeth today? Is Micah the worst because he is a day trader, or does it run deeper than that? Does the demon just want...
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Where the Devil Roams
Kevin and Walter take a break from their road trip murder spree to review Where the Devil Roams. Do the boys appreciate independent filmmaking enough to overlook some flaws? Which one of the hosts do you think is a My Chemical Romance fan? But which one loves Ladyhawke? After all of that horror...
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Annihilation
Kevin and Walter get refracted with special guest Schuyler to discuss the 2018 kind of Netflix film Annihilation. After a brief tour through the director’s career, the boys discuss the highs and lows of this sci-fi thriller. Which monster is the scariest? What does the ending mean? And can you...
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Relic
Kevin and Walter crawl out of their rotten walls to discuss 2020’s Relic. This somber movie is a meditation on the inevitability of aging and the burden placed on three generations of women. But first the boys talk a lot about masturbation. Plus, the horrors of home ownership, Kevin is a Wonka…
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Child's Play
How strong can Chucky be, really? Kevin and Walter get to the bottom of it while watching 1988’s Child’s Play. The boys have a lot of critiques for the killer doll’s methods and wonder if he can strangle with those stubby little fingers. Plus, how far will their integrity last when those ad…
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Ich Seh, Ich Seh
This episode was recorded in 2015 before either of us had any audio equipment, or how to edit. I did what I could to improve the audio, but this is about the limit of how much I can polish this one up. Hope you enjoy this from the vault episode and we will be back next week with our episode...
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Speak No Evil
The boys are back for the spookiest day of the year to chat away about Speak No Evil. Find out just how much guff your hosts are willing to take and the best ways to lie to your kid for everyone’s safety. Kevin’s hatred of the Dutch runs deep, Walter tests the bounds of human experience, and they...
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Nightmare on Elm Street
Kevin and Walter wonder if anyone still needs to be told to watch A Nightmare on Elm Street. Does this franchise spawning classic still hold up or are some outdated effects going to pull the hosts out of dreamland? The innate thermostat sense of dads, Freddy Krueger’s nipple, and men who wear too...
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Talk To Me
Walter bounces back from Covid to talk to Kevin about Talk to Me. This questionably recent horror sensation gets the boys discussing bad decisions that they buy into, the worst kind of theater goers, and whether heroin is worth it (No, the answer is no). Let us know if Kevin does a good…
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Hansel and Gretel (2007)
Follow your hosts into the woods as they break into 2007’s Hansel & Gretel and decide if it should be cast into the oven. The boys discuss the proper way to deal with roadkill, the coolest coyotes, and the most humane and awesome way to euthanize a chicken. It’s not all dead animal talk though…
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Candyman 2021
Your deadbeat podcast dads are back to discuss 2021’s Candyman. Candyman has no time to nap in this one as the scares and the social commentary get ratcheted up. The most horrific thing of all is the body horror that tarnishes the lead’s beautiful face. Kevin and Walter curse the tall and…
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Candyman 1992
The boys try to figure out what blood is for if not for shedding with 1992’s Candyman. Does this movie hold up thirty years after it came out and how does Candyman work, exactly? Walter questions Candyman’s child rearing, Kevin has no trouble believing that Walter’s wife could be a murderer, and…
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Red Dragon
Kevin and Walter finally escape from the pit they’ve been held in to review 2002’s Red Dragon and bring a close to the Hannibal Lecter trilogy. The boys ponder why people find these killers charming, why creeps direct X-Men movies, and whether their wives’ hair colors will keep them alive. Walter...
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Hannibal
Is 2001’s Hannibal a satisfying feast or can the boys not stomach this ten years later sequel? Kevin and Walter have a lot of thoughts, but first they have to break down Ridley Scott’s career and Harriet Tubman’s vitamin side business. The resurgence of tapes, the history of poppers, and…
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Silence of the Lambs
Your hosts throw around more than ideas as they discuss 1991’s The Silence of the Lambs. Has the movie been surpassed by imitators in the 30+ years since its release? Find out what scene terrifies Walter and how Kevin would overcome it, which killer is more quotable, and the red flags to look out...
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Demon City Shinjuku
Kevin and Walter overcome obstacles to return and discuss the 1988 animated film Demon City Shinjuku. Kevin fears that Walter’s historic distaste for anime will drag the whole thing down, but they share some common ground while discussing incredible lighting, character design, and animation. Will...
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American Werewolf in London
Kevin here, I'm sick with Covid, Walter is traveling, and I didn't want to have noting uploaded this week so I dug around and found an old episode I enjoyed. This episode was originally recorded in 2015 and we had to share 1 mic between the two of us. Sorry for the scuffed audio. The boys cover…
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Evil Dead Rise
Get ready to squirm as Kevin and Walter discuss this year’s Evil Dead Rise. The boys stay oddly on topic today as they discuss whether this movie lives up to the cult legacy of its predecessors. Walter is ready to give up and Kevin loves his mom, but wouldn’t hesitate to put her down. The pick…
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Scream VI
The latest chapter of the Scream series gets cut up by the boys this week. Find out if there are enough tweaks to the formula for this one to stand on its own two feet. Walter is proud of himself for making some predictions, Kevin finds out that these movies aren’t that niche, and both of them…
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Infinity Pool
The boys revisit the Cronenberg house with this year’s Infinity Pool. There’s lots of heady discussion on clones, doubles, and doppelgangers and the logistics of making love to yourself. Kevin has better uses for the movie’s technology, Walter wants to protect his neck, and both of them could use…
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Crimes of the Future
On this week’s episode, David Cronenberg’s latest with 2022’s Crimes of the Future. The boys are pretty sure they enjoyed this movie and are positive that they hate Funko Pops. While discussing this grimy, gory film, the boys touch on changing attitudes in horror, analyze a certain famous pundit…
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Deep Red
Apologies for Walter's bad audio. He had the wrong audio device set as default since he had to move his recording setup. I'll scream at him to fix it before we record next time. Walter returns to the podcast to discuss 1975’s giallo classic Deep Red. The boys get right back into the swing of...
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Pearl and X feat. Lexie
This week I have a special guest on the pod, Lexie host of Cool Normal Girl to talk about girl horror instant classics Pearl and X as well as the niche little podcast community we are a part of. I had a lot of fun talking to her about these movies, and you get to learn about how unhinged I used…
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Seoul Station
The boys are back, but something isn't quite right with Walter. Kevin returns to cover the 2016 movie Seoul Station and this might be the driest least funny episode to date, but I dare you to try to monologue and be funny. Kevin announces the guest host that will make her appearance in a week…
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Wendell and Wild
Kevin and Walter usher in the new year with another stop motion feature that’s too creepy for kids when they discuss Wendell & Wild. The boys agree on some comedy for once and reveal hidden secrets from behind the hospitality desk. Private prisons may be the real villain, but Kevin is still…
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Black Christmas (1974)
Christmas arrives a little late this year, but there is plenty of good cheer to go around when Kevin and Walter discuss the 1974 proto-slasher Black Christmas. This genre bending classic often gets overlooked compared to Halloween and the boys dig in to what might hold it back. There are plenty…
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Inside (À l'intérieur)
Irregular release schedules cut both ways when the boys drop another episode in time for the holidays. This time, Walter becomes a man filled with regret when he picks the 2007 French extreme film Inside. The movie is filled with brutal violence, but does it still shock 15 years later? Is…
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Let The Right One In
Snow and blood abound as Kevin and Walter discuss the modern Swedish classic Let the RIght One In. All kids are murderous creeps, it turns out. Regrettable hairstyles, what shoes demand ridicule or respect, and when is it ethical to feed a vampire are all covered. The American remake and the...
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Blood Rage
The boys are late to Thanksgiving when they watch 1987’s Blood Rage. Did Walter ruin Kevin’s holiday with this pick? Lots of 80’s fashion and horniness in this one. There’s plenty of digression to talk about the spectrum of enjoyable horror, recent meltdowns from certain celebrities, and sorting...
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Dawn of the Dead (2004)
A quick note from Kevin. A bit of a late upload for this episode, but I had to battle the demons at Adobe to keep my student pricing. Kevin and Walter run for their lives from 2004’s Dawn of the Dead! Kevin had a good time, but is Walter too much of a grump to enjoy the movie? Musings on fast...
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Tales from the Crypt: Bordello of Blood
The boys peer into the depths of Walter’s psyche as they discuss Tales from the Crypt: Bordello of Blood. Does lightning strike twice or is this one better left in the past? Your hosts bemoan 90’s fashion and its imminent comeback, reminisce about the most disgusting candy of their childhood, and...
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Tales from the Crypt: Demon Knight
Kevin and Walter discuss the first spin-off film of Tales from the Crypt with 1995’s Demon Knight. This may be the perfect Walter movie, but will Kevin enjoy it too? The boys reminisce about the inappropriate content they got away with watching when they were kids as they digress wildly. There’s...
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Halloween Ends
This episode is a long one, folks. Kevin and Walter are joined by returning guest Schuyler to discuss Halloween Ends and determine if it is a fitting finale to this trilogy and series as a whole. The boys pick the movie apart and touch on its place in the greater Halloween saga. Kevin reveals a...
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Fright Night 2011
The spookiest time of year continues as Kevin and Walter discuss the 2011 remake of Fright Night! Is it better than the original? Is Charley bearable this time? The boys discuss vampire lore and whether or not they are sexy, Kevin tries to incept Walter with another classic 80’s vampire pick, and...
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Fright Night 1985
This week the boys discuss the 1985 cult classic Fright Night! Fun characters, surprising special effects, and the best cinematic mom are some highlights from this horror comedy, but does a certain skeevy subplot hold the whole thing back? Also, is everyone in this movie too good to be around...
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Halloween (from the vault 2015 recording)
Since I couldn't find the old version of Wolves I looked around and found an older recording of Halloween. It's a short episode so you can compare and contrast it with our more modern recording.
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Cure
Kevin and Walter are back to discuss the 1997 Japanese psychological thriller/horror film Cure. They peel back the layers of the movie’s meanings as well as Japanese pop culture. Kevin remembers his past as a big weeb and Walter really lays into Death Note. Will the boys find their way back to…
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Chopping Mall
We’ve all had enough slow-paced mysteries and enough George C. Scott. The boys are back to talk about 1986 schlock classic Chopping Mall. Can this campy romp live up to the awesome poster/video cover? Was the 80’s just a hornier time and is Walter a prude? Lots of digressions in this one. Stick...
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The Changeling
The boys accidentally continue their retrospective on the horror career of George C. Scott with 1980’s The Changeling. Find out if they think this haunted house classic is worth a watch in the modern day. Stay tuned to the end for a fascinating George C. Scott fact that will definitely be worth…
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Exorcist 3
The Exorcist trilogy is capped off by the 1990 mystery-horror The Exorcist III. Did Kevin waste everyone’s time with another third installment, or do we have a hidden gem on our hands? The boys each watched a different cut and get to the bottom of whether or not this movie works. One thing they…
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Willy's Wonderland
Quick note from Kevin: Sorry for the poor audio quality. I broke down my pc and recording stuff thinking I was moving to a different city for work. Turns out I didn't have to move, and we should be back to our regular mid quality audio in after Exorcist 3. Kevin and Walter do everything they can…
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Exorcist II: The Heretic and Men
Kevin and Walter take a look at the 1977 sequel The Exorcist II: The Heretic. Is this really one of the worst movies ever made or is it due for a reassessment? Kevin tries to drive Walter mad with modern day slang throughout and the boys discuss the worst point for their wives to walk in on the...
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ParaNorman, Prey, and Nope
What better follow up could there be to The Exorcist than the largely forgotten animated kids movie ParaNorman? This movie is ahead of its time in a few ways, but is it a cult classic waiting in the wings? Walter wrote this blurb, so the answer is yes. Then the boys talk about some fresh horror...
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The Exorcist
Kevin and Walter are back to talk about the 1973 classic The Exorcist with the extended director’s cut. After an argument about rock, paper, scissors etiquette the boys get right into. Can Kevin endure the horror trope that scares him the most? Does Walter have a deep seeded fear of stairs? Will...
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Don't Breathe
Apologizes for the late upload. Walter has been taking care of his sick wife and kid, and Kevin has been furiously applying for jobs so we didn't have a chance to record this week, but that doesn't mean they didn't have something for you to listen to. The boys dip into the Vault of Lost Episodes...
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Morbius and Scream (2022)
Kevin and Walter are back to talk about the current meme movie of the moment, Morbius. After a long break in recording they also are back to cover Scream (2022) and give a loose ranking of the Scream franchise. Next week we'll be covering The Exorcist so make sure to watch the movie so you can...
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Don't Breathe 2
We couldn't put it off any longer. We finally watched Don't Breathe 2 and couldn't help but wonder who asked for this movie?
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Nightmare Alley
We get around to talking to the Oscar darling Nightmare Alley.
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Frequently Asked Questions
How many episodes does The Horrorists have?
The Horrorists currently has 65 episodes available on PodParley. New episodes are automatically indexed when they're published to the podcast feed.
What is The Horrorists about?
Walter and Kevin talk about horror movies, the good, the bad, the ugly.
How often does The Horrorists release new episodes?
The Horrorists has 65 episodes. Check the episode list to see recent publication dates and frequency.
Where can I listen to The Horrorists?
You can listen to The Horrorists on PodParley by clicking any episode. We provide an embedded audio player for direct listening, and you can also subscribe via your preferred podcast app using the RSS feed.
Who hosts The Horrorists?
The Horrorists is created and hosted by Beard Cave Ventures.
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