The Kink Consultant

Samia Mounts returns for a deep conversation on dismantling the patriarchy, polyamory, and how we can all break free from the systems that hold us back. Book A Consult Call with Amanda ⁠https://www.amandadames.com/book-a-consult⁠This week on The Kink Consultant Podcast, Amanda sits down with returning guest Samia Mounts, voice actor and host of the Happy Slut podcast. They explore how patriarchy harms everyone, including men, and why dismantling it leads to better sex and deeper connection. They discuss the male loneliness epidemic, why women are not experiencing the same level of loneliness, and how men are cut off from their emotions from a young age.They also explore the connection between polyamory, sexual autonomy, and feminism, why women are reclaiming their desire, and how competitive versus caretaker dynamics play out in society. If you have ever wondered how patriarchy affects your sex life and relationships, this episode offers a compelling and thought-provoking conversation.Somatica Episode: I’m Moving For A Man?!? https://youtu.be/kkAWOiQ4UnM?si=ST0H1gxx6NV3UEyzHead to https://www.swinkation.com/signup and use code TKC50 for up to $400 offConnect with Samia Mountshttps://www.samiamounts.com/https://www.instagram.com/samia.mountshttps://www.youtube.com/channel/UCBkJT8ttJYCyIS8ig6gZ7pAhttps://www.tiktok.com/@samia.mountshttps://www.samiamounts.com/podcastConnect with Amanda⁠https://www.amandadames.com/⁠⁠https://www.instagram.com/the_kinkconsultant/⁠Download the BDSM Checklist Here: ⁠https://www.amandadames.com/resource_redirect/landing_pages/2151620560⁠Courses and Resources to Help Your Kink Journey: ⁠https://www.amandadames.com/store

Licensed clinician and author Caroline Hood joins the podcast to discuss the truth about female desire, the impact of mental load, and how to navigate mismatched libido in relationships. Book A Consult Call with Amanda ⁠https://www.amandadames.com/book-a-consult⁠This week on The Kink Consultant Podcast, Amanda sits down with Caroline Hood, a licensed clinician and author of the upcoming book Sex Begets Sex: Reclaiming Desire as an Act of Female Empowerment. Caroline shares practical advice on how to start conversations about intimacy without blame, why scheduled sex can actually be helpful, and how couples can rebuild connection after years of drifting apart. They also discuss the double standards women face around pleasure, the importance of deconditioning shame, and why oral sex should never have been categorized as foreplay.If you have ever felt disconnected from your desire, struggled with mismatched libido in your relationship, or wanted to reclaim your sexual identity, this episode offers compassionate, actionable guidance.Head to https://www.swinkation.com/signup and use code TKC50 for up to $400 offConnect with Caroline Hoodhttps://www.desireinreallife.com/https://www.instagram.com/desireinreallife/https://substack.com/@desireinreallifeConnect with Amanda⁠https://www.amandadames.com/⁠⁠https://www.instagram.com/the_kinkconsultant/⁠Download the BDSM Checklist Here: ⁠https://www.amandadames.com/resource_redirect/landing_pages/2151620560⁠Courses and Resources to Help Your Kink Journey: ⁠https://www.amandadames.com/store

Cate Osborn aka Catieosaurus returns to discuss ADHD, kink, neurodivergent relationships, and how to build sustainable dynamics that work with your brain.Book A Consult Call with Amanda ⁠https://www.amandadames.com/book-a-consult⁠This week on The Kink Consultant Podcast, Amanda sits down with Cate Osborn, award-winning educator and author of The ADHD Field Guide for Adults. They discuss how ADHD impacts kink dynamics, why structure is so important for neurodivergent doms, and how burnout and overcommitment can derail even the best-intentioned relationships.Cate shares what she has learned from touring her live show, the questions she gets from audiences, and why people just want to be seen. They also explore the intersection of ADHD, sex, and intimacy, and why validation and positive reinforcement are so important for doms too. If you are neurodivergent, kinky, or both, this episode offers practical advice and real talk about making your relationships work with your brain, not against it.Head to https://www.swinkation.com/signup and use code TKC50 for up to $400 offConnect with Catieosaurushttps://catieosaurus.com/https://www.instagram.com/catieosaurus/Connect with Amanda⁠https://www.amandadames.com/⁠⁠https://www.instagram.com/the_kinkconsultant/⁠Download the BDSM Checklist Here: ⁠https://www.amandadames.com/resource_redirect/landing_pages/2151620560⁠Courses and Resources to Help Your Kink Journey: ⁠https://www.amandadames.com/store

Melancholy Ghost, Missouri title holder and boundaries educator, joins the podcast to discuss how to set, communicate, and protect boundaries in kink.Book A Consult Call with Amanda ⁠https://www.amandadames.com/book-a-consult⁠This week on The Kink Consultant Podcast, Amanda sits down with Melancholy Ghost where they discuss the difference why boundaries are essential for safe play, and what to do when someone crosses a line. Melancholy shares her framework for successful negotiations, including the CATS MEOW method she created to help people remember the key elements of communication, attentiveness, time, safety, and observing warning signs. They also explore the history of the leather community, what it means to be an asexual kinkster, and why trust must be earned and not freely given.If you have ever struggled with setting boundaries, knowing how to enforce them, or navigating negotiations in kink, this episode offers practical tools and real talk about protecting yourself and your relationships.Head to https://www.swinkation.com/signup and use code TKC50 for up to $400 offConnect with Melancholy Ghost:https://www.instagram.com/missmelancholyghost/Connect with Amanda⁠https://www.amandadames.com/⁠⁠https://www.instagram.com/the_kinkconsultant/⁠ Download the BDSM Checklist Here: ⁠https://www.amandadames.com/resource_redirect/landing_pages/2151620560⁠Courses and Resources to Help Your Kink Journey: ⁠https://www.amandadames.com/store

Amanda and her dom sit down for an honest conversation about how they navigate boundaries, fear, and communication in their 24/7 dynamic.Book A Consult Call with Amanda ⁠https://www.amandadames.com/book-a-consult⁠This week on The Kink Consultant Podcast, Amanda shares a conversation she had with her dom a few months ago where they talk about how they navigate boundaries day to day, the fears that come up for both of them, and how they communicate through the hard stuff. Her dom shares how he models the behavior he wants to see, why consistency is everything, and how he handles bratting, resistance, and mid-scene check-ins. They also explore the role of fear in a BDSM dynamic, the difference between alpha subs and brats, and why communication is the foundation of everything. If you have ever wondered what a 24/7 dynamic actually looks like behind closed doors, this episode offers an unfiltered look at the real work that goes into making it sustainable.Head to https://www.swinkation.com/signup and use code TKC50 for up to $400 offConnect with Amanda⁠https://www.amandadames.com/⁠⁠https://www.instagram.com/the_kinkconsultant/⁠Download the BDSM Checklist Here: ⁠https://www.amandadames.com/resource_redirect/landing_pages/2151620560⁠Courses and Resources to Help Your Kink Journey: ⁠https://www.amandadames.com/store

Kristen Aut returns to discuss how to date without losing yourself, break free from obsessive patterns, and step into your Hot Girl Energy this summer.Sign-up for the Hot Girl Energy Workshop here: http://www.amandadames.com/hotgirlenergyThis week on The Kink Consultant Podcast, Amanda sits down with returning guest and obsession coach, Kristen Aut. They discuss the patterns that keep women stuck in obsessive dating cycles, why women lose themselves so quickly when they feel chemistry, how to hold excitement without projecting it onto someone else, and why "pick me energy" is out. They also talk about their two-day Hot Girl Energy workshop designed to help women choose themselves, hold their own energy, and stop settling for situationships.If you have ever lost yourself in a relationship or found yourself obsessing over someone who was not right for you, this episode offers practical tools and real talk about breaking the cycle.Connect with Kristen Authttps://www.instagram.com/thekristenaut/https://www.newbadassyou.com/1to1supportConnect with Amanda⁠https://www.amandadames.com/⁠⁠https://www.instagram.com/the_kinkconsultant/⁠Book A Consult Call with Amanda ⁠https://www.amandadames.com/book-a-consult⁠Download the BDSM Checklist Here: ⁠https://www.amandadames.com/resource_redirect/landing_pages/2151620560⁠Courses and Resources to Help Your Kink Journey: ⁠https://www.amandadames.com/store

Miz Darling returns to discuss how to tell your partner about your fetish, navigate shame and fear, and build healthy relationships around kink.Book A Consult Call with Amanda ⁠https://www.amandadames.com/book-a-consult⁠This week on The Kink Consultant Podcast, Amanda sits down with returning guest and good friend Miz Darling for a conversation about one of the most common questions in the fetish community: how do you tell your partner about your fetish? They explore why shame stops so many people from having the conversation at all, including the story of a client who was considering divorce and an affair before ever speaking to his wife about his desires.Amanda and Miz Darling also discuss their upcoming book, Complicated Pleasures, which explores how fetishists navigate long-term relationships and whether it is possible to make things work with a vanilla partner. If you have ever struggled with telling your partner about your fetish, this episode offers practical advice, reassurance, and real talk about shame, fear, and connection.Know More About The Book Here:https://complicatedpleasures.ca/Connect with Miz Darling https://mizdarling.ca/Connect with Amanda⁠https://www.amandadames.com/⁠⁠https://www.instagram.com/the_kinkconsultant/⁠Download the BDSM Checklist Here: ⁠https://www.amandadames.com/resource_redirect/landing_pages/2151620560⁠Courses and Resources to Help Your Kink Journey: ⁠https://www.amandadames.com/store

Book A Consult Call with Amanda⁠ ⁠https://www.amandadames.com/book-a-consult⁠Larah Sky is back for another unfiltered conversation covering social media frustrations, kink cruise experiences, and chastity culture.This week on The Kink Consultant Podcast, Amanda sits down with returning guest and real-life friend Larah Sky. They dive into their experience on the kink cruise that they went to together, including the difference between kinksters and swingers and why many swingers are curious about kink but hesitant to ask. They discuss chastity culture and why Larah believes every man should own a cage, even if he does not wear it every day. They also explore the frustrations of being a sex worker on mainstream platforms, including bot attacks, account bans, and the challenges of maintaining an online presence.Tune in to hear about what happens on a kink cruise, why chastity is about focus and not denial, and what it is really like to be a sex worker navigating social media.Connect with Larah Skyhttps://www.larahsky.co.ukConnect with Amanda⁠https://www.amandadames.com/⁠⁠https://www.instagram.com/the_kinkconsultant/⁠Download the BDSM Checklist Here: ⁠https://www.amandadames.com/resource_redirect/landing_pages/2151620560⁠Courses and Resources to Help Your Kink Journey: ⁠https://www.amandadames.com/store

Kinky relationships and vanilla relationships might have more in common than you think.This week on The Kink Consultant Podcast, Amanda speaks with Simone Milasas, global facilitator, author, and creator of Access Consciousness, to talk about how the relationship advice she gives to vanilla couples applies just as powerfully to kinky relationships and BDSM dynamics. They cover the five elements of intimacy you need to build with yourself before you can offer them to a partner, the concept of a "creationship" and how it differs from a traditional relationship, and the one question that can either deepen your connection or finally give you both the clarity to move on. Tune in, get brutally honest with yourself, and find out what becomes possible in your kinky relationships when you stop telling yourself the story that's been keeping you stuck.Connect with Simone Milasashttps://www.simonemilasas.com/https://www.instagram.com/simonemilasas/https://vm.tiktok.com/ZMNJfnEjT/Connect with Amanda⁠https://www.amandadames.com/⁠⁠https://www.instagram.com/the_kinkconsultant/⁠Book A Consult Call with Amanda ⁠https://www.amandadames.com/book-a-consult⁠Download the BDSM Checklist Here: ⁠https://www.amandadames.com/resource_redirect/landing_pages/2151620560⁠Courses and Resources to Help Your Kink Journey: ⁠https://www.amandadames.com/store

Why does the word "masculinity" feel so loaded? I went looking for answers, and found the perfect person to break it down.In this episode, I sit down with Matt Salis, a behavioral health writer and researcher with a master's degree in sexual health and over a decade of experience in addiction and emotional abuse recovery. We get into the difference between toxic masculinity and what Matt calls emotional masculinity and why the manosphere is selling men a losing strategy. We also talk about emotional safety, resentment processing, the connection between vulnerability and sexual satisfaction, and how the consent culture in the kink community offers a model for healthier relationships everywhere.If you have ever wondered what masculinity looks like without the toxicity, or how emotional intimacy actually impacts your sex life, this conversation is going to change the way you think about both. Tune in, take what resonates, and keep exploring what feels authentic to you.Connect with Matt Salishttps://soberandunashamed.com/https://un-toxicated.com/Connect with Amandahttps://www.amandadames.com/https://www.instagram.com/the_kinkconsultant/Book A Consult Call with Amanda https://www.amandadames.com/book-a-consultDownload the BDSM Checklist Here: https://www.amandadames.com/resource_redirect/landing_pages/2151620560Courses and Resources to Help Your Kink Journey: https://www.amandadames.com/store

Finding your perfect match is already hard enough. Now try finding one who also matches you in the kink department.In this episode, I sit down with Shea Primus, CEO and founder of Upper Echelon Matchmaking, for a conversation about what kinky dating actually looks like when you get serious about finding the right person. We talk about how she went from vanilla matchmaker to scouting FetLife events and kink parties for her clients, the most common mistakes kinky singles make when dating, and what it really takes to find someone who is compatible with both your lifestyle and your dynamic. We also get into her own kink journey, boundaries, and why knowing exactly what you want is the most powerful thing you can bring to the search.If you have been navigating kinky dating and feeling like the odds are stacked against you, this episode is going to shift your perspective in the best way. Tune in, take what resonates, and keep exploring what feels authentic to you.Connect with Shea Primus  https://upperechelonmatchmaking.com/https://instagram.com/shaeprimusmatchmakerConnect with Amandahttps://www.amandadames.com/https://www.instagram.com/the_kinkconsultant/Book A Consult Call with Amanda https://www.amandadames.com/book-a-consultDownload the BDSM Checklist Here: https://www.amandadames.com/resource_redirect/landing_pages/2151620560Courses and Resources to Help Your Kink Journey: https://www.amandadames.com/store

Ever wondered what life looks like when you have a 24/7 kink dynamic, a career in the sex space, and a child to raise? Get seated because Athena Gale is giving us a sneak peek of what it actually looks like.In this episode, I sit down with Athena Gale, intimacy and kink expert, sex copywriter, and mom of an almost 11-year-old, to talk about what it genuinely looks like to be a kinky parent. We get into how she maintains a 24/7 dynamic while raising a child, how she handles age-appropriate conversations about bodies, sex, and consent in a house full of sex toys, and why your kink life does not have to disappear the moment kids enter the picture. She also shares her practical advice for kinky parents who feel like they have had to put that part of themselves on hold, including the one thing she does every single week to keep her dynamic grounded no matter how busy life gets.If you are a kinky parent trying to figure out how to hold onto your dynamic, or you are just curious what that life looks like behind the scenes, this episode is for you. Tune in, take what resonates, and keep exploring what feels authentic to you.Connect with Athena Gale https://www.instagram.com/athena_gayle/https://www.thesexcopywriter.com/Connect with Amandahttps://www.amandadames.com/https://www.instagram.com/the_kinkconsultant/Book A Consult Call with Amanda https://www.amandadames.com/book-a-consultDownload the BDSM Checklist Here: https://www.amandadames.com/resource_redirect/landing_pages/2151620560Courses and Resources to Help Your Kink Journey: https://www.amandadames.com/store

I was invited onto the podcast Couples Therapy in 7 Words with Dr. Bruce Chalmer and Judy Alexander, two proudly vanilla people who sat down with me to ask the exact questions so many people secretly have about kink, BDSM, fetishes, sexual shame, and desire. I loved this conversation so much that I immediately asked if I could re-share it here for all of you. In this episode, we talk about what kink actually is, some misconceptions about BDSM, and the difference between a kink and a fetish. I also talk about why so many people struggle to communicate their sexual desires, and how shame keeps people trapped in silence for years. We dive into consensual non-consent, primal play, cross-dressing, fetish exploration, relationship compatibility, dom/sub dynamics, masculinity, vulnerability, and why kinky people often become better communicators than many vanilla couples. This conversation goes far beyond sex and becomes a grounded discussion about BDSM relationships, emotional honesty, and healthy communication in intimate relationships. If you’ve ever felt confused about kink, curious about BDSM, or simply wanted a more compassionate and realistic conversation about kink education, this episode is for you. Connect with Dr. Bruce Chalmer and Judy Alexander https://couplestherapyinsevenwords.com/Watch Our Episode on YouTube: https://youtu.be/Wacw1Cz7JfMSee you at Hedonism II this October! Use the code TKC50 to get $200 off! https://www.swinkation.com/Connect with Amandahttps://www.amandadames.com/https://www.instagram.com/the_kinkconsultant/Book A Consult Call with Amanda https://www.amandadames.com/book-a-consultDownload the BDSM Checklist Here: https://www.amandadames.com/resource_redirect/landing_pages/2151620560Courses and Resources to Help Your Kink Journey: https://www.amandadames.com/store

Dating coach, Connell Barrett returns to the podcast and this time we’re diving into one of the biggest questions people struggle with in dating: how the hell do you actually bring up kink?In this episode, we talk about how to introduce kink naturally without making someone feel objectified, overwhelmed, or unsafe. Connell shares his perspective as someone who explored the kink world through Feeld, how he rewrote his dating profile to attract kinky women without coming across as creepy, and why “normal” is one of the sexiest compliments you can receive on a dating app. We also get into flirting versus fawning, masculine leadership in dating, why so many men are terrified of being perceived as creepy, and how self-doubt is quietly ruining modern dating. Plus, we unpack why submissive men still need leadership energy, why women often want men to lead the date regardless of kink dynamic, and why kink is really just flirting dialled all the way up.If you’ve ever struggled with talking about sex, introducing kink, or reading the room on a date this episode is for you! Connect with Connell Barretthttps://datingtransformation.com/https://www.instagram.com/datingtransformation/See you at Hedonism II this October! Use the code TKC50 to get $200 off! https://www.swinkation.com/Connect with Amandahttps://www.amandadames.com/https://www.instagram.com/the_kinkconsultant/Book A Consult Call with Amanda https://www.amandadames.com/book-a-consultDownload the BDSM Checklist Here: https://www.amandadames.com/resource_redirect/landing_pages/2151620560Courses and Resources to Help Your Kink Journey: https://www.amandadames.com/store

Flirting is supposed to be fun, not complicated. In this episode, I’m joined by dating coach and author Connell Barrett for a conversation about flirting, confidence, dating apps, rejection, and why so many people are overthinking connection. We talk about authenticity in dating, the difference between charming persistence and creepy persistence, why trying too hard is one of the biggest turn-offs, and how flirting is really just about making someone feel seen. Connell also shares practical dating advice for approaching people in real life, navigating dating apps without losing your mind, and why confidence has less to do with “alpha energy” and more to do with honesty, playfulness, and presenceWe also get into pickup artist culture, negging, ghosting, rejection sensitivity, and the very real loneliness so many people are dealing with right now. There’s dating horror stories, flirting examples that somehow become weirdly kinky, and a lot of honest conversation about what actually creates attraction beyond status, money, or “the three sixes.” If dating has been feeling exhausting, performative, or impossible lately, this episode is going to feel like a very refreshing reality check.Connect with Connell Barretthttps://datingtransformation.com/https://www.instagram.com/datingtransformation/Connect with Amandahttps://www.amandadames.com/https://www.instagram.com/the_kinkconsultant/Book A Consult Call with Amanda https://www.amandadames.com/book-a-consultDownload the BDSM Checklist Here: https://www.amandadames.com/resource_redirect/landing_pages/2151620560Courses and Resources to Help Your Kink Journey: https://www.amandadames.com/store

I have combined my most popular solo episodes to answer your most asked questions about kink, BDSM, dom/sub dynamics, and relationships. In this episode, we talk about how to safely find kink communities, what healthy BDSM relationships actually look like, navigating kinky and vanilla relationships, building confidence as a dom or sub, and the communication skills that make power exchange dynamics work long term. We also get into common red flags in kink spaces, how to introduce your desires to a partner, and why so many people struggle with feeling “not kinky enough” or “too much” at the same timeIf you’ve been curious about BDSM, exploring kink for the first time, or trying to build healthier communication and trust inside your relationships, this episode is going to give you practical advice, honest conversations, and reassurance that you’re definitely not the only one figuring this out. Tune in, take what resonates, and keep exploring what feels authentic to you.Take the BDSM Test: https://www.bdsmtest.orgSpeak Your Desires with Confidence - Download this FREE step-by-step guide to having open, honest, and judgment-free conversations about kink, boundaries, and pleasure.https://www.amandadames.com/Speak-Your-Desires-with-Confidence-opt-in-1Connect with Amandahttps://www.amandadames.com/https://www.instagram.com/the_kinkconsultant/Book A Consult Call with Amanda https://www.amandadames.com/book-a-consultDownload the BDSM Checklist Here: https://www.amandadames.com/resource_redirect/landing_pages/2151620560Courses and Resources to Help Your Kink Journey: https://www.amandadames.com/store

You’d think being a sex writer would make dating easier, right? Apparently not.In this episode, I sit down with Gabrielle Cassel, a queer sex and wellness journalist whose work you’ve probably read in Cosmopolitan, GQ, Women’s Health, and more. We start with the article that hit a little too close to home, why being a sex educator can actually make dating harder, not easier. Gabrielle shares what it’s like to be either instantly oversexualised or immediately written off the second someone finds out what she does, and how that completely changes the dynamic before it even begins. We get into the reality of dating when people project their fantasies onto you, assume what you’re into, or decide they’re not “enough” before even getting to know youGabrielle also shares about her journey from identifying as lesbian to bisexual, how attraction can evolve in ways you don’t expect, and why your sexuality is so much bigger than just who you’re attracted to. We unpack the pressure to explain yourself, the importance of curiosity in connection, and why your career, your desires, and your identity don’t have to make sense to anyone else to be valid. If you’ve ever felt misunderstood in dating, boxed in by assumptions, or like you’re constantly having to “explain yourself” just to be seen, this one is going to hit.Read Gabrielle’s article here: https://www.cosmopolitan.com/lifestyle/a70484661/sex-writer-dating-struggle-sex-therapy/Connect with Gabrielle: https://www.instagram.com/gabriellekassel/Connect with Amandahttps://www.amandadames.com/https://www.instagram.com/the_kinkconsultant/Book A Consult Call with Amanda https://www.amandadames.com/book-a-consultDownload the BDSM Checklist Here: https://www.amandadames.com/resource_redirect/landing_pages/2151620560Courses and Resources to Help Your Kink Journey: https://www.amandadames.com/store

Back for the third time, we’re joined by everybody’s favourite guest, Larah Sky.In this episode, we get into Larah’s very specific, slightly unhinged, and honestly impressive approach to dating. From identifying as pan and poly to wanting a relationship that looks completely “normal” on the outside but seems really specific and complicated behind the scenes, we unpack what she’s actually looking for in a partner. We talk about why she can’t date straight men (but also kind of wants one?), the appeal of a “pathetic but functional” boyfriend, and how her preferences are less about labels and more about personality, power dynamics, and not being boredThis conversation also covers chaotic travel schedules, content creation burnout, hiring disasters, and the reality of working in an industry where communication, boundaries, and identity are part of your everyday life. And just to make things more interesting, we’re about to see each other in person on the upcoming cruise… so if you think this episode was fun, just wait until we record the next one. Stay tuned! Connect with Larah Sky https://www.larahsky.co.ukConnect with Amandahttps://www.amandadames.com/https://www.instagram.com/the_kinkconsultant/Book A Consult Call with Amanda https://www.amandadames.com/book-a-consultDownload the BDSM Checklist Here: https://www.amandadames.com/resource_redirect/landing_pages/2151620560Courses and Resources to Help Your Kink Journey: https://www.amandadames.com/store

How does one really become a Dom? In this episode, I answer one of the most frequently asked questions from my Ask Me Anything Mondays which is: how do I become a Dom? And more importantly, how do you do it without feeling awkward, forced, or like you’re playing a role that doesn’t actually fit you? We get into why so many people feel pressure to “perform” dominance, and why that’s usually the thing getting in your way. I walk you through what Dom energy actually is, which is less about control and more about presence, and how you’re creating a space or “bubble” that your submissive steps into. We also talk about different styles of Doming, why you don’t have to be the kind of Dom you’re used to receiving, and how asking questions and actually listening is one of the most underrated skills you can have.If you’ve ever thought “my partner wants me to Dom and I have no idea how,” this is where you start. This episode will help you let go of the pressure, figure out what kind of Dom you want to be, and step into it in a way that feels natural, confident, and actually enjoyable.I’M HOSTING A LIVE CLASS! Join here: https://www.amandadames.com/domenergy2Connect with Amandahttps://www.amandadames.com/https://www.instagram.com/the_kinkconsultant/Book A Consult Call with Amanda https://www.amandadames.com/book-a-consultDownload the BDSM Checklist Here: https://www.amandadames.com/resource_redirect/landing_pages/2151620560Join the Kinky Book Club:https://www.amandadames.com/offers/H3LbqfTw/checkoutCourses and Resources to Help Your Kink Journey: https://www.amandadames.com/store

Back by popular demand, my Biz Dom, Brenda joins me in this episode to talk about what the past year has actually looked like for me. We get into what it means to rebuild your life more than once, and what it’s like being in a 24/7 Dom sub dynamic that feels aligned and expansive while still navigating very real emotions like grief, uncertainty, and starting over. Brenda came prepared with questions that pushed me to slow down, reflect, and actually look at what this season of my life is asking from me.We also get into business, censorship, and what it looks like to be a sex educator online right now when platforms are actively shutting down conversations around safety, pleasure, and education. We talk about the importance of community, why long-form platforms matter more than ever, and how to stay connected in a space that is constantly shifting. If you’ve been going through a big life transition, questioning your path, or just trying to figure out how to hold both excitement and discomfort at the same time, this episode is going to feel very real, very human, and maybe a little bit like the permission slip you didn’t know you needed.I'M HOSTING A LIVE CLASS! Join here:https://www.amandadames.com/domenergy2Connect with Amandahttps://www.amandadames.com/https://www.instagram.com/the_kinkconsultant/Book A Consult Call with Amanda https://www.amandadames.com/book-a-consultDownload the BDSM Checklist Here: https://www.amandadames.com/resource_redirect/landing_pages/2151620560Join the Kinky Book Club:https://www.amandadames.com/offers/H3LbqfTw/checkoutCourses and Resources to Help Your Kink Journey: https://www.amandadames.com/storeEpisode Highlights: (00:00) Long Distance, Big Decisions, and Moving for Love(08:30) Rebuilding Life in a New City and Starting Over Again(13:10) Finding Small Joys While Navigating Major Life Changes(16:01) Travel, Independence, and Relationship Expectations(27:07) Sex Education, Censorship, and Why Platforms Are Failing Creators

Let’s be honest, most people hear “throuple” and immediately assume chaos, jealousy, or some kind of messy situation waiting to happen.In this episode, I’m joined by Carnivale Risque, a real-life throuple made up of Tank, Ellez, and Obsidian, who are out here living, loving, and building a life together in a way most people only speculate about. We talk about what non-monogamy actually looks like behind the scenes, not the fantasy, not the internet version, but the real dynamics of communication, boundaries, and sharing a life with more than one partner. They break down how their relationship formed, how they navigate being a closed triad romantically while still playing and sharing energy in kink spaces, and what it really takes to make this kind of relationship work long term.We also get into the stuff people are really curious about but are too scared to ask. Sleeping arrangements, jealousy, conflict, finances, and yes, how three people actually function as a unit without everything falling apart. We talk about emotional maturity, ego checks, and why non-monogamy does not work without radical honesty and self-awareness. If you’ve ever been curious about non-monogamy, questioned the “one person forever” script, or just want a real, human look at what this dynamic can look like when it’s done with care, this episode is going to expand your perspective in the best way.Connect with Carnivale Risquehttps://carnivalerisque.com/https://www.instagram.com/carnivalerisquehttps://www.facebook.com/229898104290303https://www.youtube.com/channel/UCWAmtkOUzPRcV3rBpzVR9mghttps://www.x.com/CarnivaleRisqueConnect with Amandahttps://www.amandadames.com/https://www.instagram.com/the_kinkconsultant/Book A Consult Call with Amanda https://www.amandadames.com/book-a-consultDownload the BDSM Checklist Here: https://www.amandadames.com/resource_redirect/landing_pages/2151620560Courses and Resources to Help Your Kink Journey: https://www.amandadames.com/storeEpisode Highlights00:00 Poly and closed triad23:27 Sex intimacy and kink26:35 Vulnerability And Intimacy27:16 Beyond The Fantasy35:36 Switching Shame And Ego38:06 Authenticity In The Industry43:57 Titles And Real Experience

What if the “perfect Dom” isn’t dark, scary, and mean… but sarcastic, grounded, and deeply present?In this episode, I’m joined by Mistress Tash Mia, a professional dominatrix and educator who brings humor, sarcasm, and real-world groundedness into her dominance. We talk about what authentic Dom energy looks like, why safety is the foundation of surrender, and how to start exploring desires without feeling like you need to go “extreme” to be valid.We also get into the behind-the-scenes reality of being a professional space holder, including what it takes to prevent Dom burnout, how to set energetic boundaries, and why presence is one of the rarest (and hottest) skills in BDSM. If you’re dominatrix-curious, already exploring, or trying to navigate power dynamics with a partner, you’re going to feel seen in this one. Press play, take what you need, and let this conversation expand your idea of what a dominatrix really does.Connect with Mistress Tash Miahttps://www.instagram.com/theworldoftashmiahttps://www.mistresstashmia.com/Sign-up for the Free Dom/Sub Dynamics Virtual Summit here: https://kconsultant--domsubliving.thrivecart.com/vip/Connect with Amandahttps://www.amandadames.com/https://www.instagram.com/the_kinkconsultant/Book A Consult Call with Amanda https://www.amandadames.com/book-a-consultDownload the BDSM Checklist Here: https://www.amandadames.com/resource_redirect/landing_pages/2151620560Courses and Resources to Help Your Kink Journey: https://www.amandadames.com/storeEpisode Highlights:00:00 Normalizing kink: shame, secrecy, and why desire is more common than we think03:10 Where to start in kink: identify desires + set an intention04:00 Safety first: competence, boundaries, and protecting someone’s values12:00 What makes a “good sub”: communication, consent, and intention21:00 Training Doms: tools are easy, psychology is the real work25:00 Dating while kinky: bring it up early, and don’t abandon what matters to you

She started as a sex blogger in Utah, flew to Japan to train under a Shibari master whose stare alone made her cry, and never looked back.In this episode, I sit down with Julieta Chiara, a certified Shibari instructor trained under Japanese master Hajime Kinoko, who went from studying to be a sex therapist to running a sex blog, to teaching Japanese rope bondage from her studio in Tulum. Julietta breaks down the difference between Shibari and Kinbaku, why self-tying is the most underrated way to learn, and how rope bondage can be a somatic meditation even when kink isn't the goal. We also get into her identity as a bonafide submissive who only takes a top role in rope, why she refuses to tie strangers for money, and how psychological kink rather than physical tools is where her submission actually lives. This episode is intimate, deeply educational, and full of moments that will make you want to pick up a rope. Whether you've always been curious about Shibari or you've been in the scene for years, Julietta's perspective is refreshing, grounded, and genuinely one of a kind.Connect with Julieta Chiarahttps://www.instagram.com/julietachiarahttps://www.instagram.com/chiarashibari/TKC LinksSign-up for the Free Dom/Sub Dynamics Virtual Summit here: https://kconsultant--domsubliving.thrivecart.com/vip/Last Longer with Promescent. Head over to https://www.promescent.com/ and use the code TKC15 for 15% off.Connect with Amandahttps://www.amandadames.com/https://www.instagram.com/the_kinkconsultant/Book A Consult Call with Amanda https://www.amandadames.com/book-a-consultDownload the BDSM Checklist Here: https://www.amandadames.com/resource_redirect/landing_pages/2151620560Courses and Resources to Help Your Kink Journey: https://www.amandadames.com/storeEpisode Highlights:00:00 Shibari vs. Kinbaku: Why the Debate Is Overblown08:15 Learning Shibari Online vs. In Person13:00 How a Bucket List Trip to Japan Became Her Career19:00 Growing Up Sex-Positive in Salt Lake City24:00 Self-Tying as Somatic Meditation26:00 Being a Submissive Who Only Tops in Rope34:00 Psychological Kink, Objectification, and Getting Into Her Head36:00 How to Find the Right Dom (It's Just Like Dating)40:00 Three Things to Know Before Starting Your Rope Journey

The kinkiest show in Vegas is hosted by the most vanilla couple you'll ever meet. In this episode, I get to sit down with Zion and Poppy, the hosts of Rouge at the Strat, for an inside look at Vegas's sexiest show. These Australian acrobats turned comedy hosts break down how they created the most authentically kinky show on the strip without actually being kinky themselves. We talk about audience interaction, improv comedy with drunk tourists, managing a topless show while pregnant, the wild backstage stories, and why being happily married actually makes them better at hosting a sex-positive show. Zion and Poppy also get real about working six nights a week with a toddler, handling inappropriate audience behavior, and why the best audiences are old married couples who have zero filter.This episode is hilarious, insightful, and a behind-the-scenes peek at what it takes to make Vegas magic. If you've ever wondered what happens backstage at a kinky Vegas show, this conversation delivers.Episode Highlights: 00:00 Why Rouge Stands Out11:19 Vegas Sex Culture (And What's Actually Legal)20:03 Favorite Acts in the Show35:30 Wild Improv Moments and Callback Stories40:57 Being Kinky Without Being Creepy54:59 Warming Up the Crowd for Fantasy AnswersConnect with Poppy and Zion  https://www.instagram.com/zionandpoppy/https://www.instagram.com/rouge.vegas/Connect with Amandahttps://www.amandadames.com/https://www.instagram.com/the_kinkconsultant/Book A Consult Call with Amandahttps://www.amandadames.com/book-a-consultDownload the BDSM Checklist Here: https://www.amandadames.com/resource_redirect/landing_pages/2151620560Join the Kinky Book Club:https://www.amandadames.com/offers/H3LbqfTw/checkoutCourses and Resources to Help Your Kink Journey: https://www.amandadames.com/storeJoins the Couples Retreathttps://www.amandadames.com/BetaWaitlist

What if you could rewire how your brain stores pleasure in just one session?In this episode, I sit down with Jordan Wolan, a certified hypnotherapist who works with sexual freedom and performance anxiety, to talk about how hypnotherapy can actually help you have better sex. We get into what hypnosis really is (spoiler: you're already doing it when you scroll), how it can rewire your brain to enjoy new positions or experiences, and why your subconscious mind is way more powerful than willpower when it comes to lasting change. Jordan also breaks down hypnokink, how to explore it safely, and why this whole field requires way more ethics and care than most people think.If you've been curious about hypnotherapy, want to understand how your brain stores sexual habits, or you're wondering how to tap into deeper states during play, this conversation will open your mind to what's actually possible.Episode Highlights: 00:00 What hypnotherapy actually is16:13 Rewiring your brain to enjoy better sex21:44 Why hypnosis is becoming essential right now31:30 Hypnokink, ethics, and how to stay safe35:47 Consent, boundaries, and aftercare in hypnoplayConnect with Jordan Wolan https://jordanwolan.com/https://instagram.com/jordanwolanhttps://www.youtube.com/@JordanWolanConnect with Amandahttps://www.amandadames.com/https://www.instagram.com/the_kinkconsultant/Book A Consult Call with Amandahttps://www.amandadames.com/book-a-consultDownload the BDSM Checklist Here: https://www.amandadames.com/resource_redirect/landing_pages/2151620560Join the Kinky Book Club:https://www.amandadames.com/offers/H3LbqfTw/checkoutCourses and Resources to Help Your Kink Journey: https://www.amandadames.com/storeJoins the Couples Retreathttps://www.amandadames.com/BetaWaitlist

Sex magic is real. And no, this isn't some Harry Potter stuff. This is actual ritual work that could change how you manifest, orgasm, and deal with your anger.In this episode, I sit down with Lucy Baldwin, shadow alchemist, magician, author, and podcaster, for a wild ride into sex magic, existential kink, and shadow alchemy. Lucy breaks down what sex magic actually is (spoiler: it involves masturbating to sigils), why your genitals are basically your second brain, and how to get off on things you hate through existential kink. We talk about the holy hexagram (yes, it's 69 in four directions), manifestation through orgasm, working with planetary magic instead of being a victim to Mercury retrograde, and why shame is the only thing blocking your pleasure. Lucy also gets real about the origins of existential kink in orgasmic meditation, radical approval, and how to turn your anger into arousal.This episode is mystical, practical, and permission-giving all at once. If you've ever been curious about magic, manifestation, or getting off on your problems, this conversation will blow your mind.Connect with Lucy Baldwinhttps://www.remolinacoaching.com/https://www.instagram.com/lucy.baldwin.authorPenetrate Radio Podcasthttps://www.youtube.com/playlist?list=PLqoP78I-OC34i7hK4Vv41gKjr-Fk2QLJSThe Seven: Living With The Planets Podcasthttps://tr.ee/w2lKwwbjLWConnect with Amandahttps://www.amandadames.com/https://www.instagram.com/the_kinkconsultant/Book A Consult Call with Amandahttps://www.amandadames.com/book-a-consultDownload the BDSM Checklist Here: https://www.amandadames.com/resource_redirect/landing_pages/2151620560Join the Kinky Book Club:https://www.amandadames.com/offers/H3LbqfTw/checkoutCourses and Resources to Help Your Kink Journey: https://www.amandadames.com/storeJoins the Couples Retreathttps://www.amandadames.com/BetaWaitlist

Can doms be brats? Tripp Terrier says no, and the Internet lost its mind, and honestly he's not wrong.In this episode, I sit down with Tripp Terrier, power exchange content creator, kink theorist, and founder of Subspace, a free biweekly community support group for submissives and switches. We get into the brat-dom debate that's been haunting him for months, why submissives need to stop handing over all their power and actually show up 50%, and what consent really looks like before a scene even starts (hint: it's way more than a yes in the moment). Tripp also opens up about navigating social media as a straight white male dom, getting compared to Andrew Tate, his ADHD diagnosis, sobriety, and why the so-called old guard of kink needs to relax because the whole thing is newer than they think.This one is sharp, unfiltered, and the kind of conversation social media clips could never do justice. If power exchange theory is your thing, buckle up.Connect with Tripp Terrierhttps://trippterrier.com/https://www.tiktok.com/@tripp.terrierhttps://www.instagram.com/trippundermehttps://www.youtube.com/@trippterrierhttps://fetlife.com/TrippTerrierConnect with Amandahttps://www.amandadames.com/https://www.instagram.com/the_kinkconsultant/Download the BDSM Checklist Here: https://www.amandadames.com/resource_redirect/landing_pages/2151620560Join the Kinky Book Club:https://www.amandadames.com/offers/H3LbqfTw/checkoutCourses and Resources to Help Your Kink Journey: https://www.amandadames.com/storeJoins the Couples Retreathttps://www.amandadames.com/BetaWaitlist

Not sure what to expect on a kinky cruise? You're about to find out, and it's way more fun (and safe) than you think! In this episode, I’m not just going to have one, not two, but four guests! I sit down with Lee from Concasions and the powerhouse team behind Carnivale Risqué (Tank, Goddess Ellez, and Obsidian) to talk about what it's really like on a kinky cruise. These industry veterans have been teaching kink at lifestyle parties for over a decade, and they break down how they turned empty dungeons into packed playspaces by making BDSM approachable, glamorous, and fun. We dig into the upcoming Kinky Cruise in April, what to expect as a first-timer, how consent culture creates the safest party spaces, and why "swingsters" (swingers + kinksters) are now a whole community. They also get real about living as a throuple, teaching workshops on unleashing your authentic self, and why vulnerability is the sexiest thing you can bring to any relationship.This episode is part prep guide, part inspiration, and 100% permission to explore. If you've been thinking about attending a lifestyle event or just want to understand what makes these spaces so magnetic, this conversation will get you ready to dive in.Don’t let the Kinky Cruise sail without you! Go to http://www.kinkycruise.com and use the code TKC50 to get $50 offDownload the Bliss Cruise app and Celebrity Cruise app to plan your scheduleConnect with Tank, Goddess Ellez, and Obsidianhttps://carnivalerisque.com/https://www.instagram.com/carnivalerisque/https://www.facebook.com/profile.php?id=100063613538670Connect with Amandahttps://www.amandadames.com/https://www.instagram.com/the_kinkconsultant/https://www.amandadames.com/thereadinglist

Better sex isn't a luxury, it's accessible. And if you're not exploring what's out there to improve your intimacy, you're leaving pleasure on the table.In this episode, I get to sit down with Jeff Abraham, CEO of Promescent, for an honest conversation about sexual wellness, performance anxiety, and why 70% of people using delay spray don't even have premature ejaculation, they just want better sex. Jeff shares his unexpected journey from semiconductor engineering to running a sexual wellness company, and breaks down the real stats on the "arousal gap" (spoiler: the average man lasts 5 minutes and 42 seconds while the average woman needs 18 minutes). We dig into why delay products have gotten a bad rap, how Promescent's formula is different, and what Vita Flux can do for blood flow, libido, and natural lubrication. Jeff also gets real about communication, foreplay that starts hours before sex, and why vulnerability is the foundation of great intimacy.This episode is practical, sex-positive, and full of solutions. If you want better connection, longer-lasting sex, or just want to level up your intimacy game, this conversation will give you the tools to do it.Want longer-lasting sex without losing sensation? Get 15% off at Promescent.com/tkc15Episode Highlights:00:00 Changing the Conversation Around Intimacy27:34 Exploring Sexual Frequency and Refractory Periods29:19 The Impact of Good Intimacy on Attraction31:38 Addressing Anxiety and Intimacy33:30 Menopause and Women's Sexual Health35:36 Innovations in Female Arousal Products40:21 The Rise of Male Masturbatory Products53:58 The Importance of Communication in Sexual RelationshipsConnect with Jeff Abraham https://www.linkedin.com/in/technicalresources/https://www.promescent.com/Connect with Amandahttps://www.amandadames.com/https://www.instagram.com/the_kinkconsultant/Joins the Couples Retreathttps://www.amandadames.com/BetaWaitlistDownload the BDSM Checklist Here: https://www.amandadames.com/resource_redirect/landing_pages/2151620560Join the Kinky Book Club:https://www.amandadames.com/offers/H3LbqfTw/checkoutCourses and Resources to Help Your Kink Journey: https://www.amandadames.com/store

Non-monogamy isn't actually that complicated…our fear of talking about it is. And that fear keeps way too many people stuck pretending they want something they don't.In this episode, I sit down with Samia Mounts, creator and host of the ClosetEd podcast, for a raw conversation about non-monogamy, jealousy, and why emotional maturity matters more than the number of partners you have. Samia shares her journey from believing in "the one" to discovering she's wired for multiple loves. We talk about her marriage that became a friendship, navigating new relationship energy, and the difference between boundaries and control. She gets real about the mistakes she made, the red flags she ignored, and what it takes to build trust when relationships shift.If you have ever felt like you were meant to love more than one person and had no idea what to do with that truth, this conversation is for you.Episode Highlights: 00:00 Why Everyone Is In “The Closet” and Society's Norms12:17 Polyamory and Personal Experiences32:42 Defining Relationship Agreements and Boundaries34:54 Navigating Non-Monogamous Relationships42:19 Polyamory vs. Consensual Non-MonogamyConnect with Samia Mounts https://www.samiamounts.com/https://www.instagram.com/samia.mountshttps://www.youtube.com/channel/UCBkJT8ttJYCyIS8ig6gZ7pAhttps://www.tiktok.com/@samia.mountshttps://www.samiamounts.com/podcastBook a Consult with Amanda Here:https://www.amandadames.com/book-a-consultConnect with Me: ⁠https://www.tiktok.com/@thekinkconsultant⁠⁠https://www.instagram.com/the_kinkconsultant/⁠

What if intimacy didn’t have to feel so hard, awkward, or overthought?In this episode, I sit down with Danielle Harel and Celeste Hirschman, the founders of the Somatica Method and the two people who completely changed the way I understand intimacy, sex, and relationships. We talk about what Somatica actually is, why it feels so different from anything most of us have ever learned about intimacy, and why practicing connection in real time can be deeply transformative.This episode is personal for me. Somatica is the training that helped me become The Kink Consultant, and it reshaped how I show up in my body, my relationships, and my work. If you have ever felt stuck in your intimacy, overwhelmed by shame, or curious about a more embodied, human way to connect, this conversation gives you a real look at what is possible when everything is allowed to be talked about, explored, and met with care.Episode Highlights 00:00 What is Somatica?11:03 Understanding Somatica Sessions24:49 Understanding Core Wounds in Relationships27:54 Application Process for Somatica Training35:23 Virgin Island: A New TV Show40:53 The Impact of Social Media on IntimacyLearn more about Somatica:https://www.somaticainstitute.com/https://www.instagram.com/somatica_institute/https://www.instagram.com/celesteanddanielleofficial/Become a Certified Somatica Coach: https://www.somaticainstitute.com/ Use TKC250 to get $750 off!Join the Couples Retreat! https://www.amandadames.com/couples-retreatOrder Playground Miracle Melts here! https://helloplayground.com/products/miracle-melts-hydrating-insertConnect with Me: ⁠https://www.tiktok.com/@thekinkconsultant⁠⁠https://www.instagram.com/the_kinkconsultant/⁠

Let's talk about the thing no one wants to touch: DDLG, innocence play, and why "daddy" has become the internet's new favorite word. In today’s episode, I sit down with Rena Martine, author and former sex crimes prosecutor turned women's intimacy coach, for one of the most honest conversations about taboo fantasies, shame, and reclaiming pleasure without apology. We dig into why powerful women crave submission, what innocence play actually means (spoiler: it's not what you think), how survivors sometimes use kink for healing, and why society will sell you slutty Halloween costumes but shame you for the desires behind them.This episode is permission-giving, unflinching, and absolutely necessary. If you've ever felt shame for wanting something "wrong," this conversation is your permission slip to want what you want.Episode Highlights: 00:00 Rena's Journey from Prosecutor to Intimacy Coach15:15 Understanding DDLG and Age Play28:37 Exploring Society's Double Standards29:38 Privilege and Normalizing Taboo Discussions31:09 Non-Monogamy and Societal Judgments32:16 Polyamory and Public Perception37:25 Kink Acceptance and Media Representation42:54 Navigating DDLG Dynamics47:48 Empowerment Through KinkConnect with Rena Martinehttps://www.renamartine.com/bookhttps://www.instagram.com/_rena.martine_/Join the Couples Retreat! https://www.amandadames.com/couples-retreatOrder Playground Miracle Melts here! https://helloplayground.com/products/miracle-melts-hydrating-insertConnect with Me: ⁠https://www.tiktok.com/@thekinkconsultant⁠⁠https://www.instagram.com/the_kinkconsultant/⁠

You heard it here first: sex gets better as you age. Don’t believe me? Listen to this episode.I sit down with Susan Bratton, intimacy expert and sex educator, for a refreshing conversation about pleasure, confidence, and why desire does not have an expiration date. We talk about how so many people are taught to expect sex to fade over time, and why that belief is doing way more damage than aging ever could. Susan shares what actually helps couples stay curious, connected, and turned on long term, especially when shame and routine start creeping in. We also get into kink, power dynamics, and sexual longevity. Susan explains how confidence, embodiment, and caring for your body play a huge role in pleasure as you get older, and why performance-focused sex often gets in the way of real intimacy.This episode is permission-filled, honest, and surprisingly hopeful. If you want proof that your best sex might still be ahead of you, this conversation will absolutely change your mind.Episode Highlights: 00:00 Maintaining Sexual Health and Stamina25:53 Embracing Confidence and Sexuality27:43 Maintaining Sexual Health with Age29:43 The Role of Nitric Oxide30:48 The Benefits of Pumping32:20 Advanced Treatments for Sexual Health34:26 Red Light Therapy and LubricantsConnect with Susan Brattonhttps://betterlover.comhttps://getflowfree.comhttps://getglowbelow.comhttps://pumpingguide.comJoin the Couples Retreat! https://www.amandadames.com/couples-retreatGet your BDSM Checklist here: https://www.amandadames.com/bdsmlistConnect with Me: ⁠https://www.tiktok.com/@thekinkconsultant⁠⁠https://www.instagram.com/the_kinkconsultant/⁠

Being obsessed with someone can be so embarrassing. Frankly, you barely even know this person but somehow your brain has decided that this person is now the main character of your life. Been there, done that. In this episode, I sit down with my coach, Kirsten Aut to talk about obsession in a way that feels honest, relatable, and way less shameful. We unpack why obsession happens, why trying to “just stop thinking about it” never works, and how desire, fantasy, and attachment get all tangled together when someone lights up your nervous system just enough to throw you off balance.If you have ever thought, “Why am I like this?” or caught yourself spiraling over someone you barely dated, this episode will make you feel seen, understood, and a lot less alone.Episode Highlights: 00:00 Understanding Obsession and Attachment12:01 Realizations and Reflections on Obsession27:20 Growth Mindset in Relationships29:37 Navigating Modern Dating35:01 Trusting Your Intuition38:51 Manifestation and Personal GrowthConnect with Kristen Authttps://www.newbadassyou.com/https://www.instagram.com/thekristenaut/https://www.tiktok.com/@thekristenautJoin the Couples Retreat! https://www.amandadames.com/couples-retreatGet your BDSM Checklist here: https://www.amandadames.com/bdsmlistConnect with Me: ⁠https://www.tiktok.com/@thekinkconsultant⁠⁠https://www.instagram.com/the_kinkconsultant/⁠

Who says you need a dungeon or hours of planning for a night you’ll never forget? In this episode we're sharing 5 simple and powerful BDSM scene ideas you can use tonight—no fancy gear or prep required. From voice-only command scenes and sensory deprivation with household items, to secret service rituals, playful punishment games, and emotional restraint with praise, you’ll find inspiration for any dynamic. Plus, don’t miss the 5-minute scene challenge! Ready to make your night unforgettable? Check out our “Scene Creation Mastery” (only $9!) at https://domsubliving.com/scene-creation-mastery/Connect with Alessandra https://domsubliving.com/https://www.instagram.com/domsubliving/https://www.tiktok.com/@domsublivinghttps://www.facebook.com/domsublivinghttps://www.youtube.com/@DomSubLiving?sub_confirmation=1Check Out My Friday Vibe Series: https://thekinkconsultant.substack.com/Get your FREE BDSM Checklist HEREhttps://www.amandadames.com/bdsmlistConnect with Me: ⁠https://www.tiktok.com/@thekinkconsultant⁠⁠https://www.instagram.com/the_kinkconsultant/⁠

Talking about sex should not be this hard, and yet for so many people, it still is.In this episode, I sit down with Dr. Tara, tenured professor of relational sexual communication, host of the Luvbites podcast, and author of How Do You Like It?, to talk about what actually makes a sex life and a relationship work. We cover everything from why emotional safety is the real prerequisite for good communication, to how shame shows up in our relationships long before we ever talk about kink.Dr. Tara shares what she teaches her university students about sexual communication across the lifespan, from sexual debut to long-term partnership, aging, and everything in between. We talk about why most people were never taught how to talk about sex, money, or desire, and how that lack of language quietly impacts intimacy.If you have ever struggled to ask for what you want, felt disconnected from a partner, or wished there was a guidebook for navigating intimacy, this episode will give you clarity, language, and a lot to reflect on.Episode Highlights: 00:00 Sexual Communication and Education08:43 Emotional Safety in Relationships17:50 Personal Divorce Stories and Lessons Learned18:42 Communicating About Money and Sex in Relationships22:30 Essential Communication in Relationships25:22 Understanding Sexual Preferences and PolyamoryGrab a copy of her book: How Do You Like It?: A Guide for Getting What You Want (in Bed) https://amzn.to/4iWt60aConnect with Dr. Tara https://www.luvbites.co/https://www.instagram.com/luvbites.co/https://www.youtube.com/channel/UCrbW6PCKjgcxkq3dTvjjeyQhttps://open.spotify.com/show/2SZ60RxLOyQ900l4PgJAlTJoin the Couples Retreat! https://www.amandadames.com/couples-retreatGet your BDSM Checklist here: https://www.amandadames.com/bdsmlistConnect with Me: ⁠https://www.tiktok.com/@thekinkconsultant⁠⁠https://www.instagram.com/the_kinkconsultant/⁠

One thing about kinky dating: it should not be this hard to find your people. Thankfully, BeeDee App exists and yes, I brought Pieter back on the podcast because a lot has happened since the first time he was here.In this episode, Pieter and I get into compatibility percentages, brat detection failures, monogamy filters, and why BeeDee is miles better than scrolling through FetLife hoping someone in your city is actually compatible. We also talk about BeeDee’s new features like incognito mode and travel mode, and the wild stats behind how many messages, matches, and relationships are happening because of this app. If you’ve ever wished kinky dating felt easier, more intentional, and way less chaotic, this episode is your permission slip to finally download the app, take the test, and meet people who actually match you inside and outside the bedroom.Episode Highlights: 00:00 Personal Experiences with BeeDee App13:24 The Origin Story of BeeDee App20:29 New Features and Updates on BeeDee App29:47 Upcoming Features on BeeDee AppDownload the BeeDee App https://web.beedee.app/Check Out My Friday Vibe Series: https://thekinkconsultant.substack.com/Sign-Up For the TCK Couples Retreat: https://www.amandadames.com/BetaWaitlistConnect with Me: ⁠https://www.tiktok.com/@thekinkconsultant⁠⁠https://www.instagram.com/the_kinkconsultant/⁠

"The number one thing about being a Dom is you need to have the best interest of the other person in mind.You cannot take advantage of the other person because of their submissive role."In this episode, we're continuing the conversation about finding Doms, and what actually makes a good one. Spoiler: it's not about being the strictest or the loudest, it's about showing up consistently, knowing when to admit you're wrong, and understanding that feelings can (and will) change how you play. We dive into what he's actually looking for in a submissive, how he deals with performance anxiety without spiraling, and why sometimes the best thing a Dom can do is pause the whole D/S dynamic.If you've been wondering what separates a good Dom from someone who just talks a big game, or you're trying to level up your own leadership without losing your mind, you'll definitely enjoy this episode.Episode Highlights: 00:00 Understanding the Dom-Sub Dynamic06:28 Educating Your Dom11:09 Consistency in Dom-Sub Relationships20:59 Support and Consistency in D/s Dynamics27:29 Spotting Submissive Tendencies38:42 Exploring New Dynamics TogetherSign-up for the Couples Retreat! For couples and curious duos ready to explore kink, deepen trust, and turn communication into connection. ⁠https://www.amandadames.com/BetaWaitlist⁠Let’s take kink to the high seas! Join me at the Kinky Cruise at ⁠https://www.kinkycruise.com⁠ and use code TKC50 FOR $50 off per person.Check Out My Friday Vibe Series: ⁠https://thekinkconsultant.substack.com/⁠Connect with Me: ⁠⁠https://www.tiktok.com/@thekinkconsultant⁠⁠⁠⁠https://www.instagram.com/the_kinkconsultant/⁠⁠

One of the questions I get constantly is, “Where can I find a Dom?”So in this episode, I sit down with my Dom to talk honestly about where real Doms come from, how he found the kink community, and what he actually looks for when choosing a submissive.In this episode, he shares how he found the kink community, what shaped the way he leads, and how our dynamic started long before either of us named it. We talk about emotional steadiness, consistency, red flags, green flags, and the difference between a man performing dominance and someone who can genuinely hold you. If you’ve ever wondered where to meet a Dom, how to choose one, or what a grounded power exchange feels like from the inside, this conversation gives you a clear, real-world look behind the scenes.Episode Highlights: 00:00 Discovering FetLife and Online Communities05:33 Learning and Growing as a Dom24:11 How We Actualy Me25:48 Advice for Subs and Doms in the Dating World33:59 The Importance of Communication and Flexibility36:16 Handling Emotional Regulation and Vulnerability40:06 Respecting Boundaries and InsecuritiesHow to Tell Your Partner Your Kink Join this 1-hr workshop and learn how to talk to your partner about your kink without shame, panic, or awkward silence https://www.amandadames.com/offers/GvipoKWe/checkoutLet’s take kink to the high seas! Join me at the Kinky Cruise at https://www.kinkycruise.com and use code TKC50 FOR $50 off per person.Check Out My Friday Vibe Series: https://thekinkconsultant.substack.com/Connect with Me: ⁠https://www.tiktok.com/@thekinkconsultant⁠⁠https://www.instagram.com/the_kinkconsultant/⁠

Strictly Anonymous Confessions: Secret Sex Lives of Total Strangers with Kathy Kay In this episode, I talk with Kathy Kay, host of the Strictly Anonymous podcast and author of Strictly Anonymous Confessions: Secret Sex Lives of Total Strangers. We get into how her hit podcast began with Craigslist ads, how she’s collected over 1,200 real-life sex stories, and what she’s learned about desire, shame, and human nature along the way.Kathy Kay and I dive into the wildest stories from her new book; from 50 gangbangs to secret throuples, and women discovering their sexuality later in life. We talk about how these confessions reveal the truth about what people really want, how she keeps it all anonymous, and why storytelling is the key to normalizing desire without shame.If you’ve ever been curious about the fantasies people keep hidden or just love hearing real stories that prove no one is as “normal” as they seem, this episode is going to be your new guilty pleasure.Pre-order The Book: https://amzn.to/4i7hBCdEpisode Highlights: (00:00) How Strictly Anonymous Confessions Was Born(09:00) The Stories Behind the Book(18:00) Shame, Desire, and Owning Your Pleasure(23:00) Normalizing Nontraditional Relationships(35:00) Why People Crave Anonymity and ConfessionPre-order The Book: https://amzn.to/4i7hBCd⁠Listen to the Podcast: https://www.strictlyanonymouspodcast.com/Connect with Me: ⁠https://www.tiktok.com/@thekinkconsultant⁠⁠https://www.instagram.com/the_kinkconsultant/⁠Check Out My Friday Vibe Series: https://thekinkconsultant.substack.com/Speak Your Desires with Confidence - Download this FREE step-by-step guide to having open, honest, and judgment-free conversations about kink, boundaries, and pleasure.https://www.amandadames.com/Speak-Your-Desires-with-Confidence-opt-in-1

What happens when your ADHD brain meets your kink identity? Turns out, they have a lot more in common than you might think.In this episode, I sit down with Cate Osborne, also known as Catieosaurus, sex educator, content creator, and author of The ADHD Field Guide for Adults, to talk about how neurodivergence shapes intimacy, communication, and play. Cate shares her story of being diagnosed with ADHD at 30 and how that discovery changed everything: from her relationships to her career to the way she experiences pleasure.We dive into rejection sensitivity, safe words, aftercare, and why kink can be such a powerful framework for neurodivergent people to feel seen, understood, and safe. Cate also shares insights from her new book, a practical (and very funny) guide to adulting with ADHD, and why she believes self-compassion is one of the most underrated forms of aftercare.If you’ve ever felt “too much,” struggled to ask for what you need, or wanted to understand how kink and neurodivergence overlap, this episode will make you feel a little less alone and a lot more understood.Episode Highlights: 00:00 ADHD and Kink: The Overlap12:21 Rejection Sensitivity and Kink19:23 The Power of Self-Advocacy21:03 Kink and Neurodivergence24:41 Personal Kink Journeys28:54 Normalizing Kink and CommunicationPre-Order her book here: ​​https://catieosaurus.com/the-adhd-field-guideConnect with Cate: https://www.instagram.com/catieosaurus/https://catieosaurus.comConnect with Me: ⁠https://www.tiktok.com/@thekinkconsultant⁠⁠https://www.instagram.com/the_kinkconsultant/⁠Let’s take kink to the high seas! Join me at the Kinky Cruise at https://www.kinkycruise.com and use code TKC50 FOR $50 off per person.Speak Your Desires with Confidence - Download this FREE step-by-step guide to having open, honest, and judgment-free conversations about kink, boundaries, and pleasure.https://www.amandadames.com/Speak-Your-Desires-with-Confidence-opt-in-1

What really happens after betrayal, and how do you start to heal when trust has been broken?In this episode, I sit down with Lauren LaRusso, therapist and infidelity specialist, to talk about the messy, painful, and deeply human side of cheating. We explore why infidelity happens, the emotional chaos it brings, and how both partners, the betrayed and the betrayer, can find their way back to honesty and self-understanding.Lauren and I also unpack the connection between kink and infidelity, how fear of rejection, shame, or unmet desires can lead someone to explore outside their relationship. We talk about the importance of vulnerability, honest communication, and the courage it takes to express who you really are before crisis hits.If you’ve ever been cheated on, cheated yourself, or just want to understand what drives betrayal, this episode is a raw, compassionate, deep dive into the psychology of desire, avoidance, and emotional repair.Episode Highlights: 00:00 Defining Cheating and Its Complexities07:28 The Role of Kink in Infidelity19:32 Living Authentically in Relationships22:13 Practicing Honesty in Relationships24:28 Facing the Fear of Abandonment32:11 Resources for Healing and SupportConnect with Lauren: https://www.laurenlarusso.com/contacthttps://www.instagram.com/laurenlarussoConnect with Me: ⁠https://www.tiktok.com/@thekinkconsultant⁠⁠https://www.instagram.com/the_kinkconsultant/⁠Speak Your Desires with Confidence - Download this FREE step-by-step guide to having open, honest, and judgment-free conversations about kink, boundaries, and pleasure.https://www.amandadames.com/Speak-Your-Desires-with-Confidence-opt-in-1

Episode 56 - For Beau Delacroix, kink isn’t just play. It’s art, storytelling, and self-expression.In this episode, I go behind the scenes with Beau to talk about how creativity and control come together in his work as a Dom, content creator, and artist. From filming erotic stories to crafting toys by hand, Beau shares how intention, aesthetics, and vulnerability shape every scene he creates.We talk about the balance between dominance and empathy, how to lead with emotional intelligence, and what it means to create art that feels both erotic and human. Beau also opens up about masculinity, shame, and why letting go of perfection is often the most liberating part of creation both in kink and in life.If you’ve ever been curious about the artistry behind BDSM or how creators like Beau turn fantasy into something real, this episode is your invitation to step behind the curtain.Episode Highlights00:00 Journey into Content Creation20:46 Living Openly and Embracing Kink22:59 Navigating Kink Dynamics in Relationships27:07 Teaching Kink to Long-Term Partners30:44 Crafting and Sharing Kink Implements33:34 Balancing Control in Kink and Personal Life40:08 Finding Kinky Partners in the Modern Dating WorldConnect with Beau:https://www.instagram.com/beau_delacroix/https://www.tiktok.com/@beau_delacroixhttps://onlyfans.com/artoforgasmConnect with Me: ⁠https://www.tiktok.com/@thekinkconsultant⁠⁠https://www.instagram.com/the_kinkconsultant/⁠Speak Your Desires with Confidence - Download this FREE step-by-step guide to having open, honest, and judgment-free conversations about kink, boundaries, and pleasure.https://www.amandadames.com/Speak-Your-Desires-with-Confidence-opt-in-1

Ready to turn people on and change their lives? Get certified with Somatica at somaticainstitute.com and use code TKC25 for $750 off your enrollment.Episode 56 - In this episode, I sit down with my friend Aubrey Aust, a relational psychology and philosophy researcher from NYU, to unpack the psychology behind BDSM, fantasy, and desire. We talk about how kink can become a space for healing, a “relational laboratory” for exploring trust, safety, and selfhood.Aubrey and I go deep on Freud, daddy issues, jealousy, and why honesty about desire is non-negotiable. We explore how shame can block intimacy, what embodiment really feels like, and how the dynamics of dominance and submission mirror our earliest emotional patterns. Whether you’re a dom, sub, switch, or just curious about the psychology behind play, this conversation will have you thinking about kink in a whole new way.Episode Highlights: (00:00) Exploring Fantasy and Desire Through BDSM(02:45) Revisiting Freud and Modern Sexual Psychology(10:45) The Power of Honesty in Desire and Connection(15:00) Working With Kinky and Non-Kinky Partners(21:00) Embodiment, Boundaries, and Somatic Awareness(29:00) Can Kink Be Therapeutic?(34:00) Relational Energy and Co-Regulation Check out Lube Life's ultra slick, thick silicone lube!Connect with Aubrey Austhttps://www.instagram.com/aubrey__austConnect with Me: ⁠https://www.tiktok.com/@thekinkconsultant⁠⁠https://www.instagram.com/the_kinkconsultant/⁠Speak Your Desires with Confidence - Download this FREE step-by-step guide to having open, honest, and judgment-free conversations about kink, boundaries, and pleasure.https://www.amandadames.com/Speak-Your-Desires-with-Confidence-opt-in-1

Ready to turn people on and change their lives? Get certified with Somatica at somaticainstitute.com and use code TKC25 for $750 off your enrollment.Episode 55 - Let’s talk about back door play, the kind of pleasure that deserves way more hype (and way less shame).In this episode, I sit down with Annette Benedetti, host of Talk Sex with Annette and certified sex and intimacy coach, to unpack everything you’ve ever wanted to know about exploring the back door. We get into how to prepare, what to expect, and how to make it fun, safe, and insanely pleasurable for everyone involved.Annette shares her real-life guide; from her favorite toys and plugs to lube tips, comfort positions, and how to talk about it without awkwardness. We also discuss why communication and consent are the ultimate turn-ons, how to handle nerves (and mess), and why curiosity should always come before shame.If you’ve ever been curious about trying backdoor play but weren’t sure where to start, this episode gives you all the confidence, info, and laughter you need to make it your new favorite adventure.Episode Highlights(00:00) The Myth of Virginity and the Power of Experience(12:00) Exploring the Backdoor: Tips, Prep, and Cleanliness(18:00) Backdoor Toys, Training Kits, and Plug Preferences(29:00) Safety Tips, Hygiene, and Aftercare(32:00) Understanding Partners, Boundaries, and Communication(38:00) Breaking Shame and Making Pleasure NormalConnect with Annette: https://www.instagram.com/annettebenedetti/www.youtube.com/@talksexwithannettetalksexwithannette.com/shop-with-annetteConnect with Me: ⁠https://www.tiktok.com/@thekinkconsultant⁠⁠https://www.instagram.com/the_kinkconsultant/⁠Speak Your Desires with Confidence - Download this FREE step-by-step guide to having open, honest, and judgment-free conversations about kink, boundaries, and pleasure.https://www.amandadames.com/Speak-Your-Desires-with-Confidence-opt-in-1

Ready to turn people on and change their lives? Get certified with Somatica at somaticainstitute.com and use code TKC25 for $750 off your enrollment.Episode 54 - In this episode, I sit down with Lee, founder of ConCations, the company behind Kinky Cruise and Kinky Caribbean, to talk about what really happens when the kink world hits the high seas. We get into how these cruises came to life, what makes them so different from your typical hotel takeovers, and why so many people leave feeling more connected than ever to themselves, their partners, and the community.Lee also opens up about his own 24/7 power exchange dynamic, what it’s like juggling kink, family, and polyamory, and why these events are about so much more than sex. They’re about finding your people, building real intimacy, and creating spaces where everyone belongs.If you’ve ever wanted to explore lifestyle travel or just love the idea of a vacation where consent, connection, and play come first, this episode will have you ready to pack your cuffs (and maybe your sunscreen).Episode Highlights(00:00) From Weekend Cons to Weeklong Connections(10:00) Bridging Swingers and Kinksters with Swinkation(20:00) High Protocol vs. Everyday Power Exchange(33:00) Beach Parties, Dungeons, and Sex-Positive Play(39:00) Connecting Before the Cruise Starts(41:00) Why This Is Perfect for BeginnersJoin the next Kinky Cruise! Head to https://www.ConCations.com and use the code TKC50 for fifty dollars off your booking!Connect with Me: ⁠https://www.tiktok.com/@thekinkconsultant⁠⁠https://www.instagram.com/the_kinkconsultant/⁠Speak Your Desires with Confidence - Download this FREE step-by-step guide to having open, honest, and judgment-free conversations about kink, boundaries, and pleasure.https://www.amandadames.com/Speak-Your-Desires-with-Confidence-opt-in-1

Ready to turn people on and change their lives? Get certified with Somatica at somaticainstitute.com and use code TKC25 for $750 off your enrollment.Episode 53 - In this episode, I sit down with Shelby Devlin, Somatica-certified sex and relationship coach, BDSM educator, and author of The Pleasure Protocol, to talk about her journey from working at a San Francisco fetish boutique to becoming one of the most respected BDSM coaches in the field. We talk about Barbie bondage beginnings, the psychology of power, and why shame-free exploration is the gateway to pleasure that actually lasts.If you’ve ever wanted to understand how BDSM can become a path toward self-awareness, healing, and deeper connection, this conversation is for you.Episode Highlights: (00:00) Barbie Bondage and Early Curiosity(12:00) How Somatica Training Changed Everything(18:00) Combining Somatic Touch and BDSM Coaching(23:00) Healing Shame and Building Safety Through Play(38:00) Communication, Consent, and Aftercare 101Connect with Shelbyhttps://www.shelbydevlin.com/bioConnect with Me: ⁠https://www.tiktok.com/@thekinkconsultant⁠⁠https://www.instagram.com/the_kinkconsultant/⁠Speak Your Desires with Confidence - Download this FREE step-by-step guide to having open, honest, and judgment-free conversations about kink, boundaries, and pleasure.https://www.amandadames.com/Speak-Your-Desires-with-Confidence-opt-in-1

Get your kinky breakthrough in just 20 minutes. Book your call with The Kink Consultant here: https://www.amandadames.com/Episode 52 - What happens when your relationship is built on trust, power exchange, and pushing limits together?In this episode, I sit down with Lucas and Hazel of Ripped Digital to talk about what it really takes to live and create on the more extreme side of BDSM. From navigating risk and safety in hardcore play to building a 24/7 power exchange dynamic, Lucas and Hazel share openly about their relationship, their porn production, and why empathy and trust are at the heart of everything they do.We dive into what it means to eroticize shame, how fantasies differ from reality, why safety tools like negotiation checklists and aftercare rituals matter, and how they’ve turned their personal kinks into a professional life that still feels authentic. If you’ve ever wanted to understand what happens behind the scenes of extreme kink content or how couples can thrive while exploring the edges of BDSM,  this is one you won’t want to miss.Episode Highlights: (00:00) Risk Awareness, Safety, and Harm Reduction(06:00) Negotiation, Trust, and First-Time Scenes(12:00) Eroticizing Shame and Exploring Taboo Fantasies(21:00) Aligning Public and Private Kink Identities(30:00) Sadism, Empathy, and Keeping Power in Check(41:00) Why Authentic Headspace Matters More than Scripted Porn(47:00) Cinematic Fantasies and Bucket List Scenes(53:00) Creating Content that Feels Real and ExperientialConnect with Hazel and Lucas ⁠https://ripped.digital/scenes/Home-Movies-Lucas-and-his-little_vids.html⁠Connect with Me: ⁠⁠https://www.tiktok.com/@thekinkconsultant⁠⁠⁠⁠https://www.instagram.com/the_kinkconsultant/⁠⁠Speak Your Desires with Confidence - Download this FREE step-by-step guide to having open, honest, and judgment-free conversations about kink, boundaries, and pleasure.⁠https://www.amandadames.com/Speak-Your-Desires-with-Confidence-opt-in-1⁠

Get your kinky breakthrough in just 20 minutes. Book your call with The Kink Consultant here: https://www.amandadames.com/Episode 51 - Ever wondered what really goes down on a Temptation Cruise? Think clothing-optional pool decks, wild theme nights, and the kind of freedom you definitely don’t get on a regular vacation.In this episode, I sit down with Mario Cruz, the Cruise Director who knows all the secrets, to share why these couples-only trips keep selling out. From first-timers finding their confidence to hands-on BDSM workshops and sensual massage classes, Mario gives us a peek behind the curtain at what really makes Temptation Cruises unforgettable.If you’ve ever thought about lifestyle travel or just want to know why people call this “spring break for adults,” this is the episode that will have you ready to pack your bags.Episode Highlights: (00:00) What Happens Inside The Temptation Cruises(04:05) Exploring the Lifestyle on Board(06:56) Cruise Itineraries and Destinations(11:33) Educational Workshops and Activities(17:34) Booking Information and Upcoming CruisesJoin the Temptation Cruiseshttps://temptationcruises.com/Connect with Me: ⁠https://www.tiktok.com/@thekinkconsultant⁠⁠https://www.instagram.com/the_kinkconsultant/⁠Speak Your Desires with Confidence - Download this FREE step-by-step guide to having open, honest, and judgment-free conversations about kink, boundaries, and pleasure.https://www.amandadames.com/Speak-Your-Desires-with-Confidence-opt-in-1

Get your kinky breakthrough in just 20 minutes. Book your call with The Kink Consultant here: https://www.amandadames.com/Episode 50 - Back on The Kink Consultant, Larah Sky shares what really goes down when you’re running chastity challenges like Sexless September and Locktober. From easy-mode orgasm schedules to full denial, she breaks down why men keep signing up for chastity plans and what keeps them coming back for more. We also get into the chaos of OnlyFans rules, the viral TikToks that blew up her business, and why chastity has become one of the most talked-about kinks online.If you’ve been thinking about trying chastity, or just want to know what makes it so addictive, this episode gives you the inside scoop (and a good laugh along the way).Episode Highlights: (00:00) Sexless September and Chastity Challenges(09:29) Chastity and Sissy Play(15:49) Challenges with Content Platforms(19:56) Challenges and Strategies on OnlyFans(22:27) Content Restrictions(32:01) Chastity World and Future PlansConnect with Larah SkyType “Larah Sky is legendary on Google” or check out: https://www.larahsky.comhttps://www.larahsky.co.ukhttps://www.chastity.worldConnect with Me: ⁠https://www.tiktok.com/@thekinkconsultant⁠⁠https://www.instagram.com/the_kinkconsultant/⁠Speak Your Desires with Confidence - Download this FREE step-by-step guide to having open, honest, and judgment-free conversations about kink, boundaries, and pleasure.https://www.amandadames.com/Speak-Your-Desires-with-Confidence-opt-in-1