PODCAST · kids
The Mama Circle: Why Motherhood Feels Like This
by Natalie K. Martin
You can love your kids and still hate what modern motherhood asks of you. The invisible labour, financial squeeze, relationship strain, overwhelm and the feeling that somehow, you’re the problem. There’s a name for everything motherhood quietly costs women: The Motherhood Debt. And this is where we say it out loud.Each episode puts words to the parts of motherhood you’ve felt but couldn’t explain. More honesty, less pressure, and space to find your way towards a motherhood that feels supportive, joyful and sustainable for you, as a woman and a mum.Hosted by Natalie K. Martin.
Episodes
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A request and a short season break
After 95 episodes, The Mama Circle is taking a short season break. The full archive is still here while I step out of weekly production for a few weeks and give some intentional thought to how the podcast grows and what comes next. The next new episode will be released around the middle of…
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95. The money questions every couple should ask before having kids
Most couples ask, “Can we afford to have a baby?” But that conversation often focuses on nappies, childcare and maternity leave, rather than what becoming parents could mean for each person’s financial future. In this episode, I’m sharing the money conversations I think couples should have before...
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94. How do you make time for sex after having kids? with Alice Jackson
How do you make time for sex after having kids when you’re exhausted, touched out and barely have time to speak to your partner? In Part 2 of my conversation with somatic intimacy coach and embodiment teacher Alice Jackson, we talk about what intimacy can realistically look like after becoming...
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93. Why don't I feel sexy since becoming a mum? with Alice Jackson
Why don’t I feel sexy since becoming a mum? If your desire has disappeared, your body no longer feels like your own or being touched is sometimes the last thing you want, there may be very good reasons. In this episode, I’m joined by somatic intimacy coach and embodiment teacher Alice Jackson for...
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92. What if my child prefers the other parent?
What if your child prefers being at their other parent's house? It's a fear that caught me completely off guard when my son was away with his dad. Not because I thought he might love his dad more, but because their household can afford experiences that I sometimes can't. As a single mum parenting...
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91. You can love your kids AND love time away from them
I'm 3 days into a child-free week and I'm REALLY enjoying it. In this episode, we're talking about mum guilt, the mental load of motherhood, and why enjoying time away from your child doesn't make you a bad mum. What happens when your brain finally has space to think? And does loving your own...
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90. We can’t build a village while tearing other mums down
We say mums need a village. But we cannot build one while publicly humiliating the women we disagree with. After Nara Smith appeared on Call Her Daddy to discuss the trad wife label, motherhood and her daughter’s cancer treatment, social media filled with reactions. Some offered thoughtful...
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89. I can't be honest with my friends since becoming a mum
Where do mums go with the thoughts they can't say out loud? We all filter ourselves depending on who we're with. That's normal. But what happens when there is nowhere we can tell the whole truth? In this episode, Natalie explores why every mum needs at least one place where she can speak honestly...
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88. Can you really afford to have kids?
Most women prepare for pregnancy. Far fewer prepare for what motherhood does to their long-term finances. In this episode, Nat explores the motherhood penalty, why women's earnings often fall after having children while men's continue to rise, and why the biggest financial cost of motherhood…
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87. Sometimes I don't like my child
Sometimes the hardest part of parenting isn't loving your child. It's feeling like you just don't click. In this episode, Nat explores a Reddit post that asks a question many parents are too afraid to admit out loud. Could it be that some parents and children are simply less naturally compatible?...
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86: We split everything 50/50. So why am I still the default parent?
We split the parenting and household tasks 50/50. So why am I still the one noticing, remembering, planning and making sure everything gets done? Equal parenting is often described as dividing everything down the middle: night feeds, nappies, nursery runs, cooking and housework. But completing…
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85. You've just yelled at your kid. Now what?
Have you become the shouty mum you always said you'd never be? This week, I'm talking about something so many mums experience but so few feel able to admit: anger. I explore why mum rage is rarely just about the moment itself, what might be sitting underneath it, and how the realities of modern...
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84: Why is my kid always the wild one?
Why is my kid always the one running off, climbing everything, touching everything or having the enormous public meltdown while everyone else’s child seems so calm? After travelling with my almost three-year-old, I found myself watching children his age quietly walking beside their parents or...
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83. Why millennial mums want a 90s childhood for their kids
Why are so many millennial mums trying to recreate the 90s childhood we remember for our own children? We want them playing outside, getting bored, spending less time on screens and making simple memories that don’t need to be photographed or posted. But the childhood we’re nostalgic for wasn’t...
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82. Why more sleep isn’t fixing your exhaustion as a mum
What happens when you’re getting more sleep but still waking up completely exhausted? After separation, moving house, working, parenting and months of pushing through without properly recovering, I reached a point where my body and brain began to feel like they had nothing left. I was sleeping…
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81. How I’m keeping my culture alive while raising my mixed-heritage son abroad
How do you keep your culture alive for your child when they’re growing up somewhere else? My son is British and German, with Jamaican heritage, and is growing up in southern Germany. As he gets older, I’m realising that raising a mixed-heritage child abroad involves far more than teaching him two...
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80. Taking permission to chill
It has been a BIG week (or two), and sometimes you need to be given permission to take a break. 🫂 Join a loving community of mums in IT'S A LOT – free for 30 days. We talk about this kind of stuff in It's A Lot. So, if you’re feeling shaky having brought your new baby home, in the trenches of...
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79. Starting over after a breakup with kids
Starting over after a breakup with kids isn’t just heartbreak. It’s boxes everywhere. Admin. Bills. Furniture. Childcare. Internet that still doesn’t work. Trying to build stability for your child while your entire life is being rebuilt around them. In this episode, I’m talking honestly about the...
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78. Child maintenance: what it actually covers, what it doesn’t, and how to talk about it
Separation with kids changes your finances overnight. In this episode, we’re talking about money after a breakup, and what child maintenance actually covers, and what it doesn’t. Because this is where a lot of the confusion and conflict starts. We cover: what child maintenance is really for why…
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77. Breaking up when you have kids: why there is no clean break
When you have children together, a breakup is rarely one clean exit. The relationship ends, but the shared life doesn’t. You can’t simply cut contact, disappear to heal or make decisions based only on what you need. You’re still parenting, coordinating and trying to remain civil while processing...
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76. You prepared for birth, but not for becoming a mother
We spend months preparing for birth - the hospital bag, the antenatal classes, the birth plan. But almost no one prepares us for what comes after. Becoming a mother! In this episode, Nat explores the gap between preparing for a baby and actually becoming a mother, and why so many women feel…
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75. I thought I had a village… until I really needed one
This episode explores a moment many mums experience but rarely talk about, the realisation that in certain moments, you are completely on your own. After a chaotic IKEA run, Nat found herself overwhelmed, stuck, and unable to see a solution. What followed was a deeper recognition of something…
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74. Is it just me, or is motherhood actually this hard?
Motherhood can feel overwhelming, even when nothing is “wrong”. In this episode, I talk about why motherhood can feel so hard, especially when you’re juggling sleep deprivation, financial pressure, relationship strain, and the mental load all at once. I share two personal moments where everything...
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73. Going back to work after maternity leave isn’t a return to normal
Going back to work after maternity leave doesn’t mean returning to the career or capacity you had before becoming a mum. You may be ready to use your brain differently, earn more and start progressing again. But you’re returning inside a completely different structure: childcare fees, nursery...
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72. Living together after a breakup (the part of separation we don’t talk about)
Living together after a breakup is one of the least talked about stages of separation. You’re not fully together. You’re not fully apart. And you’re not fully independent. From the outside, everything can look the same. Same house. Same routines. Same family structure. But internally, everything...
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71. Why I felt ashamed to claim benefits as a single mum
Why can claiming benefits feel like a personal failure, even when the support exists for exactly the situation you’re in? After separating from my son’s father, I began looking for somewhere new for us to live. Between rising rents, my part-time income and carrying most of the childcare, I had to...
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70. The Motherhood Debt: The hidden costs of becoming a mum
In this episode, I’m sharing the idea that sits underneath so much of this podcast: the motherhood debt. It’s the hidden cost of becoming a mother, not just financially, but emotionally, relationally, mentally and practically too. I talk about the moment I realised I felt like I was drowning, why...
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69. We don’t need Mother’s Day cards. We need support.
In this episode, Natalie reflects on how expectations around Mother’s Day can quietly shift after children arrive. What was once about celebrating your own mum can suddenly become multi-generational, bringing different traditions, assumptions, and sometimes tension about how the day should be...
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68. I stopped negotiating with my toddler - FAFO Parenting
You’re told to stay calm. Keep explaining. Offer choices. Negotiate gently. But what happens when you’ve repeated yourself ten times and nothing changes? In this episode of The Mama Circle Podcast, Nat shares a shift she’s been experimenting with during the toddler years: stepping away from…
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67: Love is not a custody plan: why parenting prenups matter
When we fall in love, we don’t sit down and map out how we’d separate. We assume love will carry us. But love is not a custody plan. In this episode, I talk about something that might feel uncomfortable at first: what if we treated parenting like the structural commitment it is? What if we had…
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66. You’re not stuck. You’re in a Maintenance Season
If you’re keeping everyone fed, answering the urgent messages and getting through the week, but feel like you’re not moving forwards, you may not be stuck. You might simply be in a maintenance season. We live in a culture that celebrates growth, momentum and reinvention. It pays far less…
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65. Is modern motherhood a scam?
This week I’m responding to a Reddit thread titled: “How the heck are we all okay with this scam?” The post describes what so many families are living: • Dual income just to stay afloat • Hyper-scheduled days • Childcare costs exploding • Zero margin • No real time with your own children And the...
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64. Why do I do all the hard stuff and he gets to be the fun one?
Why does one parent get the outings, adventures and happy memories while the other does the school runs, sick days, discipline and endless mental load? The stereotype of the “fun dad” can seem harmless. But when one parent gets to enjoy the lighter parts of family life while the default parent...
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63. The 5 Villages every mum needs
This episode explores why so many mothers feel like they’re parenting without a village, even when they’re surrounded by people who care. I break down the five different kinds of support mothers actually need, and why expecting them all from the same people creates disappointment, resentment, and...
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62. The motherhood I imagined vs the one I’m living
Before becoming a mum, you might imagine how you want motherhood to feel. But what happens when the life you’re actually living looks completely different? A year after sharing that I wanted my motherhood to feel fun and easeful, I return to those words and ask whether they still fit. In that…
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61. Nothing shapes your motherhood more than who you have children with
Love matters when choosing someone to have children with. But love alone cannot tell you what your experience of motherhood will be like. Your partner becomes part of your motherhood environment, just like your finances, housing, childcare, health and support network. Their ability to manage...
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60. This Is Us and the fantasy of modern family life
What does This Is Us get right about motherhood and family life, and what does it make look far easier than it really is? After finally finishing all six seasons, I couldn’t stop thinking about the Pearson family. The show captures the tiny moments that shape a childhood, the way family stories...
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59. A little New Year’s Eve check-in
New Year can feel like magic or heaviness or absolutely nothing at all. In this short New Year’s Eve episode Nat invites you to pause, breathe and gently acknowledge the year you just walked through. No resolutions. No reinvention. No new-year-new-you. This conversation is a soft reflection space...
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58. A Christmas Eve check-in
Christmas Eve is here and if you are listening as this episode lands, you are probably juggling excitement, pressure and a to do list too long for one day. This is a short and gentle episode to simply ask how you are, really. Not the polite answer, not the performance, but the truth. We look at…
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57. I ended my 10-Year relationship: The guilt of separating with a child
What happens when you know ending your relationship is the right decision, but you’re terrified of what it could mean for your child? In this deeply personal episode, I share something I hadn’t planned to say publicly: after ten and a half years together, I ended my relationship with the father…
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56. Seven motherhood myths keeping you stuck
What if the reason motherhood feels so hard isn’t that you’re doing it wrong, but that you’re trying to live up to ideas about “good motherhood” that were never true? Inspired by Harriet Lerner’s book The Mother Dance, this episode explores seven motherhood myths that can leave mums feeling...
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55. My birth story - The birth I planned versus the birth I had
In this episode, I am finally sharing the full story of how my little boy came into the world. I have hinted at it so many times and mums often ask for it, partly because we do not get many chances to tell our birth stories in full. As I share in this episode, birth is one of the biggest...
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54. Christmas shouldn’t be another job for mum.
Christmas can feel magical after having children. It can also become another enormous job for mum. In this episode, I share practical ways to make Christmas less stressful, particularly if you’re hosting family, managing everyone’s expectations and quietly carrying the work behind the festive...
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53. The truth about childcare guilt (and how to stop feeling it)
Childcare guilt shows up for so many mums, even when childcare is the thing that keeps the whole family afloat. One comment at a playgroup or one post on social media can send us into a spiral of “am I doing the right thing” and it needs to stop. In this episode I talk about the real roots of...
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52. What postpartum support should really look like - with Geri Spicer & Hannah Warnes of The 4th
What does real postpartum support look like? In this episode, I’m joined by Geri Spicer and Hannah Warnes, founders of The 4th, a new London-based service redefining how we care for mothers after birth. We talk about: • The gap between birth prep and postpartum reality • Why “you’ll be fine”…
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51. My mother-in-law moved in to ‘help’...and made everything worse
This week we’re diving into the mother-in-law problem: when support turns to control, and when well-meaning advice becomes a slow erosion of your confidence. We’ll talk about: Why mother-in-laws often overstep after a baby arrives The emotional undercurrent of fear, loss of relevance, and control...
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50. How to save on groceries - what my family actually spend in a month
Food prices keep climbing — but what does it actually cost to feed a family right now? In this episode, Nat takes you through her real grocery numbers (around €550–€600 a month for two adults and a toddler) and the small, realistic shifts she’s making to spend less without losing the joy of a…
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49. A love letter to my son - The Gifts of Motherhood
In today’s episode, I’m taking a step back to reflect on the gifts motherhood has given me through my son, Jackson. This is the softer side of the story... the one where motherhood gives more than it takes. From clarity and courage to the kind of love that remakes you from the inside out, these…
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48. The real reason mums are exhausted - hello, The Mental Load!
You know that feeling when you’re wiped out but can’t explain why? You’ve been running on autopilot, juggling birthday gifts, nap schedules and meal plans, but it’s not just the doing that’s exhausting. It’s the thinking about everything. In this episode, Nat dives into the real reason mums are...
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47. When having a baby breaks your marriage (and why it really happens)
So many of us feel blindsided by how much motherhood changes our relationships. Nobody warns you how having a baby can completely rewrite the dynamics between you and your partner...the exhaustion, the resentment, the unspoken mental load. In this episode, Nat reads two Reddit posts from mums…
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ABOUT THIS SHOW
You can love your kids and still hate what modern motherhood asks of you. The invisible labour, financial squeeze, relationship strain, overwhelm and the feeling that somehow, you’re the problem. There’s a name for everything motherhood quietly costs women: The Motherhood Debt. And this is where we say it out loud.Each episode puts words to the parts of motherhood you’ve felt but couldn’t explain. More honesty, less pressure, and space to find your way towards a motherhood that feels supportive, joyful and sustainable for you, as a woman and a mum.Hosted by Natalie K. Martin.
HOSTED BY
Natalie K. Martin
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Frequently Asked Questions
How many episodes does The Mama Circle: Why Motherhood Feels Like This have?
The Mama Circle: Why Motherhood Feels Like This currently has 99 episodes available on PodParley. New episodes are automatically indexed when they're published to the podcast feed.
What is The Mama Circle: Why Motherhood Feels Like This about?
You can love your kids and still hate what modern motherhood asks of you. The invisible labour, financial squeeze, relationship strain, overwhelm and the feeling that somehow, you’re the problem. There’s a name for everything motherhood quietly costs women: The Motherhood Debt. And this is where we...
How often does The Mama Circle: Why Motherhood Feels Like This release new episodes?
The Mama Circle: Why Motherhood Feels Like This has 99 episodes. Check the episode list to see recent publication dates and frequency.
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You can listen to The Mama Circle: Why Motherhood Feels Like This on PodParley by clicking any episode. We provide an embedded audio player for direct listening, and you can also subscribe via your preferred podcast app using the RSS feed.
Who hosts The Mama Circle: Why Motherhood Feels Like This?
The Mama Circle: Why Motherhood Feels Like This is created and hosted by Natalie K. Martin.
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