The Mom Psychologist Show

Your child hits you and then immediately reaches out for a hug. Do you give it to them? It's common to freeze in these moments, worried you're rewarding the hitting or sending mixed signals. In this episode I'm breaking down what's actually happening in your child's brain when they seek connection after aggression, why the choice between comfort and consequence is a false one, and exactly what to say in real time so you can hold the boundary and stay connected at the same time. 00:55 What's happening in their brain. 03:34 Common Mistake Parents Make 06:27 What does it look like in real life 07:41 After returning to baseline 9:46 The long game Get TMP Times in your inbox every Monday. Start your free 7-day trial 👉🏽 https://www.themompsychologist.com/tmptimes 💌 Free Parenting Script Pack: https://themompsychologist.com/script-pack 💌 Follow me over on Instagram - http://www.instagram.com/themompsychologist If you enjoyed this episode, consider leaving a rating. It truly helps. Thanks for tuning in!

Your child isn't defiant, they're undercoached. That's the reframe I want to leave you with in this episode, and I promise it will change how you show up in the hardest parenting moments. I share the story of my own toddler getting aggressive at a play gym and the one question that shifted me from reactive to intentional in real time. I break down the invisible social and emotional curriculum that starts at home with us, the exact phrases every child needs to know starting in the toddler years, and how to use play (not lectures) to teach these skills proactively. I also talk about line feeding your child words in the moment, what labeled praise actually sounds like, and why if things feel messy right now that means you're right in the middle of the most important work. 00:24 Moment at a play gym 01:21 Misperceiving Behavior 04:16 Importance of Direct Scripts 06:56 Power of Play 08:58 Repetition 12:22 Misconception That We're Failing 14:02 Reflection 14:26 Conclusion and Mantra Get TMP Times in your inbox every Monday. Start your free 7-day trial 👉🏽 https://www.themompsychologist.com/tmptimes 💌 Free Parenting Script Pack: https://themompsychologist.com/script-pack 💌 Follow me over on Instagram - http://www.instagram.com/themompsychologist If you enjoyed this episode, consider leaving a rating. It truly helps. Thanks for tuning in!

"That's not fair." "You're not the boss of me." "I don't WANT to." Most of us were raised where those phrases got us in serious trouble — so when our own kids say them, our nervous system goes straight to threat mode. In this episode I'm reframing all of it. I break down what each of these phrases actually means from a developmental standpoint, how to tell the difference between healthy communication and genuine disrespect, and the exact scripts to respond in a way that holds your authority and honors your child's growing voice at the same time. I also share why shutting these phrases down might be teaching the opposite of what you want — including the skill your teenager is going to need. Grab my free Script Pack at the link in the show notes for more scripts you can use right away. Chapters 00.26- Intro 00:44- What's Actually Developing 02:30- The 5 Phrases and What They Really Mean 05:20- Healthy Communication vs. Actual Disrespect 09:06- Scripts That Hold the Boundary and Honor Their Voice Get TMP Times in your inbox every Monday. Start your free 7-day trial 👉🏽 https://www.themompsychologist.com/tmptimes 💌 Free Parenting Script Pack: https://themompsychologist.com/script-pack 💌 Follow me over on Instagram - http://www.instagram.com/themompsychologist If you enjoyed this episode, consider leaving a rating. It truly helps. Thanks for tuning in!

LET'S CHAT ALL THINGS PARENTING: I'm answering all your parenting questions and sharing real advice you can actually use in this Q&A from lying to teachers, sibling teasing and aggression, my experience losing 100 lbs after having 3 kids, backtalk and negative attitudes, responding to "I'm not going to let you play anymore!", 3 year old being too aggressive with baby, dating talk, forming secure attachment with our kids, guiding teenagers into colleges without being pushy, and more!! If you've ever struggled with any of these, this episode is for you. 💖 Chapters: 00:49- Question 1: How to handle 5 year old lying to teacher? 02:53- Question 2: My sister is telling my nephew he has a bad attitude. How could she handle this better? Episode on Backtalk - https://courses.themompsychologist.com/podcasts/the-mom-psychologist-show/episodes/2149076210 04:45- Question 3: My 6yr old ignores name calling by her friends. Is that ok? Episode on Mean Kids - https://courses.themompsychologist.com/podcasts/the-mom-psychologist-show/episodes/2148686406 07:58- Question 4: How should I handle 6yo saying no to non negotiable things (going to bed/brushing teeth) 09:43- Question 5: How can we help guide our teenagers into colleges/career choices without being pushy? 13:24- Question 6: How to stop overreaction (yelling/pushing) in daughter when younger bro teases her 16:04- Question 7: Has horrible parental fighting done irreversible damage to 3 and 6 yo. How to undo - help 18:29- Question 8: Can you build a secure attachment when you have been anxious in the early years? 20:07- Question 9: How do you redirect language/behavior that is sassy/disrespectful without lecture? 20:24- Question 10: 3 yr old boy constantly pulling on baby bros clothes, knocks him down. How to curb behavior 23:28- Question 11: How to respond when 4yo says "fine, I'm not going to let you play anymore!" (To mom) 26:28- Question 12: I know you don't talk about your weight loss journey here, but you have elsewhere? 27:54- Question 13: Giving birthday this month. What helped you lock in to get healthy? Really hoping to give this to myself. 30:49- Question 14: Is it normal for 7yo to develop an attitude when she doesn't get her way? She's like a teen 💌 Get TMP Times in your inbox every Monday. Start your free 7-day trial 👉🏽 https://www.themompsychologist.com/tmptimes 💌 Free Parenting Script Pack: https://themompsychologist.com/script-pack 💌 Follow me over on Instagram - http://www.instagram.com/themompsychologist If you enjoyed this episode, consider leaving a rating. It truly helps. Thanks for tuning in!

I'll never forget the time my 7-year-old had a full meltdown on our bedroom floor over a shirt disagreement. After 30 minutes of listening, problem-solving, and offering alternatives, I finally said, "It's okay to feel upset. Don't let your feelings get in the way of your responsibilities." Then I walked away. Five minutes later, she was completely ready. In this episode, I break down why constant emotional processing without expectations can actually increase your child's emotional intensity and prevent them from building resilience. Chapters: Intro: Emotional Validation Has Gone Too Far - 00:00 Meltdown Story: What I Said to My 7-Year-Old - 01:05 How to Model "Both/And" Language - 11:28 Building Resilience: When to Process vs. Redirect - 13:22 💌 Get TMP Times in your inbox every Monday. Start your free 7-day trial 👉🏽 https://www.themompsychologist.com/tmptimes 💌 Free Parenting Script Pack: https://themompsychologist.com/script-pack 💌 Follow me over on Instagram - http://www.instagram.com/themompsychologist If you enjoyed this episode, consider leaving a rating. It truly helps. Thanks for tuning in!

Try my free 7-day trial of TMP Times: https://www.themompsychologist.com/tmptimes You cannot force food down a child's throat. You cannot force pee into a potty. You cannot force a brain to fall asleep. If you're fighting these battles every single day, you're fighting battles you can never win and it's making everything worse. In this episode, I break down the 3 power struggles you'll never win (food, potty training, sleep), introduce the Division of Responsibility framework that removes the battle entirely, and give you exact scripts for dinner refusals, bedtime stalling, and morning routine resistance. You'll learn the difference between controlling their body (which creates psychological reactance) vs. controlling the environment (which actually works). Scripts for What You CAN Control FOR FOOD BATTLES: When they refuse dinner: "This is what we have for dinner. Eat what you want from your plate. When dinner's over, we'll have a small dessert." When they demand dessert without eating: "Dessert is part of our meal. Here's your portion. Still hungry after? More dinner is available." When they say "I don't like this": "Okay, you don't have to eat that. What else on your plate would you like to try?" When they haven't eaten much all day: "I notice you haven't eaten much today. Your body might be feeling hungry. Here's what we have. Take what you'd like." FOR BEDTIME BATTLES: When they won't stay in bed: "I see you're not sleepy yet. Time for your body to rest though. You can look at books or play quietly in bed." When they keep asking for "one more" thing: "Last call - need anything before I go? Water? Hug? Okay, that's it. I'm going to rest too now." When they stall at bedtime: "Teeth brushing time. You can do it yourself or I can help. What works for you?"

Ever feel like the more you correct your child’s backtalk, the worse it gets? In this episode, I’m breaking down why that happens and sharing real-life scripts and mindset shifts that actually work. You’ll walk away with practical tools to handle those tough moments, connect with your child, and bring more peace to your home. I would LOVE to hear your thoughts! Drop me a DM over on Instagram @themompsychologist so we can keep this conversation going! All my love, Dr. J ❤️ Wanna go deeper? Join my live Discipline Masterclass on September 17th - www.themompsychologist.com/discipline-class Download my free Script Pack at www.themompsychologist.com/script-pack Work with me at www.themompsychologist.com/membership Weekly newsletter with scripts, tips, and real-life stories from my motherhood journey - www.themompsychologist.com/tmptimes

I would LOVE to hear your thoughts! Drop me a DM over on Instagram @themompsychologist so we can keep this conversation going! All my love, Dr. J ❤️ Important note: This applies to neurotypical children or when neurodivergence has already been considered. If your child might be neurodivergent, the "perfect at school, difficult at home" pattern often indicates masking and genuine depletion rather than boundary-testing. It's *still* important to focus on guiding children's behavior through respectful boundaries, teaching, and clear expectations.  Wanna go deeper? Join my live Discipline Masterclass on September 17th - www.themompsychologist.com/discipline-class Download my free Script Pack at www.themompsychologist.com/script-pack Work with me at www.themompsychologist.com/membership Weekly newsletter with scripts, tips, and real-life stories from my motherhood journey - www.themompsychologist.com/tmptimes

I would LOVE to hear your thoughts! Drop me a DM over on Instagram @themompsychologist so we can keep this conversation going! All my love, Dr. J ❤️ Wanna go deeper? Download my free Script Pack at www.themompsychologist.com/script-pack Work with me at www.themompsychologist.com/membership Weekly newsletter with scripts, tips, and real-life stories from my motherhood journey - www.themompsychologist.com/tmptimes

Okay, real talk... mornings can bring out a whole different side of me, and I know I’m not the only one! In this episode, I’m getting honest about my “Nagging Nancy” moments, why our kids push back on routines, and how I’m learning (slowly but surely) to step back and let them take the lead. We’re talking about building real motivation, letting natural consequences do their thing, and giving ourselves grace when things get messy. If you’re tired of the morning chaos and want some practical, heart-centered tips (plus a mantra to keep you grounded), this one’s for you. Let’s grow together, one imperfect morning at a time!  Download my free Script Pack at www.themompsychologist.com/script-pack Work with me at www.themompsychologist.com/membership Weekly newsletter with scripts, tips, and real-life stories from my motherhood journey - www.themompsychologist.com/tmptimes  

I don’t know about you but I was never taught about body safety or consent. Let alone my growing body, puberty or sex. It just wasn't the type of conversations I had with my parents. Left to my own devices, friends and media became my biggest teachers. I don’t want this for my kids. I want to be involved in helping them understand boundaries, their bodies, and how to keep themselves safe. I want to give you my 7-step process on teaching kids about body consent and safety.

So your child has been watching a certain TV show or playing on a certain app and you’ve realized that you no longer want them on it.  You want to set a boundary but you also know how upsetting this will be for them.  What do you do?!  In this episode, I’ll share the exact script to use during these moments and important things to keep in mind!   If you enjoyed this episode, consider leaving a rating. It truly helps. Thank you again for listening. Parent coaching & community: http://themompychologist.com/membership Discipline Workshop (free): Http://www.themompychologist.com/workshop Instagram: https://instagram.com/themompsychologist YouTube: https://youtube.com/c/themompsychologist

When it comes to screen time - my biggest tip is to make sure your children are exposed to quality content. To me, quality boils down to being: 👶🏽Age appropriate (made exactly for your child’s age range and development). 📚Educational and/or inspiring (versus just entertaining). 💃🏽Engaging and interactive (encourages them to participate either by calling out answers, dancing, sharing their ideas, etc). Nowadays, there are so many options to choose from that it can be hard to know what is quality and what’s not. That’s why in this video, I’ll be sharing some of my current (and past) favorites that I think you should check out. Keep in mind, this is not an exhaustive list. I kept the list short for a reason. Save 50% off your annual plan using my affiliate link- https://playpokpok.com/redeem/?code=50DRJAZMINE

Uh oh! You just got word that your child is being excluded by kids at school. Other kids are saying hurtful things and don’t let your child play with them. You feel horrible and want this to STOP. You want your child to wake up and stop being friends with them but you also don’t want them to feel judged and shut down. In this episode, I’ll share: Best ways to respond in these moments so your child feels supported but also knows how to stand up for themselves How to help your child think about friendship in a more holistic way Tools to teach your child how to make and keep good friends  Check out books like: The Not So Friendly Friend- https://amzn.to/3QFbysE Let’s Talk About Body Boundaries, Consent and Respect- https://amzn.to/3WFgx09 The Survival Guide for Making & Keeping Friends- https://amzn.to/3UWlwZ7 The Little Book of Friendship- https://amzn.to/4bylSKV My Way to Making Friends- https://amzn.to/3WHba0y How to Be a Friend: A Guide to Making Friends and Keeping Them- https://amzn.to/3UHSATx ________________________________________________________________________ If you enjoyed this episode, consider leaving a rating. It truly helps. Thank you again for listening. Parent coaching & community: http://themompychologist.com/membership Discipline Workshop (free): http://www.themompychologist.com/workshop Instagram: https://instagram.com/themompsychologist YouTube: https://youtube.com/c/themompsychologist

As a psychologist and mom of three, I don’t always know the right things to say at the right times nor do I always say things how I mean to say them.  What helps me is having a few go-to phrases to fall back on during stressful moments because it helps me to redirect my focus to what matters - my relationship with my child.  Here are a few of my favorite go-to parenting phrases for intense moments. _______________________________________ If you enjoyed this episode, consider leaving a rating. It truly helps. Thank you again for listening. Parent coaching & community: http://themompychologist.com/membership Discipline Workshop (free): www.themompychologist.com/workshop Instagram: https://instagram.com/themompsychologist YouTube: https://youtube.com/c/themompsychologist

So lately your child has been saying some really shocking things like “You like my sister more than me!” or “I’m such a boring kid!”  You’re trying to stay curious and get her to open up about her feelings but it keeps happening and each time she says it, it really stings. What do you do? In this episode, I’ll share: Why kids resort to these phrases & what they’re really trying to say How to respond best in the moment   _______________________________________ If you enjoyed this episode, consider leaving a rating and review. It truly helps. Thank you again for listening. Join the waitlist for my membership: www.themompsychologist.com/membership Discipline Workshop (free): http://www.themompychologist.com/workshop  Instagram: https://instagram.com/themompsychologist YouTube: https://youtube.com/c/themompsychologist

90% of your child’s brain develops by age 5. To ‘develop’ is to change, and your child’s brain is changing at rapid speed. Here are the top 5 things to make sure you start teaching your child by age 5 in order to maximize this growth period & set your child up for success. Having trouble getting your little one to get involved around the house? Check out this video for practical tips to motivate your child to do chores (without bribes or allowance). You can also download my free chore checklist, which includes age-appropriate chores for toddlers through teens as well as a chore chart to help keep everyone organized and accountable. ___________________________________________________ If you enjoyed this episode, consider leaving a rating. It truly helps. Thank you again for listening. Parent coaching & community: http://themompychologist.com/membership Discipline Workshop (free): www.themompychologist.com/workshop Instagram: https://instagram.com/themompsychologist YouTube: https://youtube.com/c/themompsychologist

If you enjoyed this episode, consider leaving a rating. It truly helps. Thank you again for listening. Parent coaching & community: http://themompychologist.com/membership Discipline Workshop (free): www.themompychologist.com/workshop Instagram: https://instagram.com/themompsychologist YouTube: https://youtube.com/c/themompsychologist  

If you enjoyed this episode, consider leaving a rating. It truly helps. Thank you again for listening. Parent coaching & community: http://themompychologist.com/membership Discipline Workshop (free): www.themompychologist.com/workshop Instagram: https://instagram.com/themompsychologist YouTube: https://youtube.com/c/themompsychologist  

It’s just one of those mornings - you know, the kind when NOTHING satisfies your child. 😰 No matter how much you try to reason with them, validate their feelings or accommodate their needs, they insist on digging in their heels, changing their minds & making unreasonable demands left and right. Now you’re spiraling, yelling, and exhausted… And it’s only 7 AM. 🤬😳 In this episode, I’ll be sharing: The #1 reason kids dig in their heels  How to respond to their constant demands and whining  How to re-think these moments so you’re less likely to lose your cool. __________________________________ If you enjoyed this episode, consider leaving a rating. It truly helps. Thank you again for listening. Parent coaching & community: http://themompychologist.com/membership Discipline Workshop (free): www.themompychologist.com/workshop Instagram: https://instagram.com/themompsychologist YouTube: https://youtube.com/c/themompsychologist

So while strangers are simply people your family doesn't know, "tricky people" can be both strangers and people we're familiar with. In this video, you'll learn how to talk to kids about "tricky people" without causing fear. After listening to this episode, you'll know: What is a "tricky person" 3 things to teach your children about tricky people Common signs of "tricky people" How to empower your children (rather than scare them) _________________________________ If you enjoyed this episode, consider leaving a rating. It truly helps. Thank you again for listening. Parenting Blog: https://www.themompsychologist.com/blog Parent Coaching & Community: http://themompsychologist.com/membership Discipline Workshop (free): https://www.themompychologist.com/workshop Instagram: https://instagram.com/themompsychologist YouTube: https://youtube.com/c/themompsychologist

So your toddler keeps whining, crying, and pleading without despite how much you're trying to explain and validate their feelings. No matter what you say, though, they KEEP whining and crying. 😓 It’s exhausting to keep repeating myself but then you feel guilty for ignoring him after a while. In this 8-min episode, I’ll discuss how to approach these situations mentally and practically. How to interpret this behavior and what to say and do.  __________________________________ If you enjoyed this episode, consider leaving a rating. It truly helps. Thank you again for listening. Parent coaching & community: http://themompychologist.com/membership Discipline Workshop (free): www.themompychologist.com/workshop Instagram: https://instagram.com/themompsychologist YouTube: https://youtube.com/c/themompsychologist

Picture this - You’re at a party and all of a sudden another child comes up to you and tells you your child SPIT on another child. 😳What in the world? You’re instantly filled with anxiety, shock, and embarrassment. You step in to find out what’s going on but to your dismay, your child won’t say ANYTHING. Nothing brings out more stress and pressure than parenting in the wild (especially when your child won’t cooperate).  In this episode, I’ll be sharing 1) How to interpret public misbehavior, 2) Exactly what to do and say during these stressful moments, and 3) What NOT to do (aka mistakes to avoid) and why.  If you enjoyed this episode, consider leaving a rating. It truly helps. Thank you again for listening. >>Parent coaching & community: http://themompychologist.com/membership >>Discipline Workshop (free): http://www.themompychologist.com/workshop  >> Instagram: https://instagram.com/themompsychologist >>YouTube: https://youtube.com/c/themompsychologist  

In this episode, I share the top 5 phrases to avoid saying to your child (& why), and most importantly, what to say instead.  If you enjoyed this episode, consider leaving a rating and review. It truly helps. Thank you again for listening. Join the waitlist for my membership: www.themompsychologist.com/membership Discipline Workshop (free): http://www.themompychologist.com/workshop  Instagram: https://instagram.com/themompsychologist YouTube: https://youtube.com/c/themompsychologist

In this episode, I share how to avoid bedtime battles (and power struggles in general). Hope you enjoy! If you liked this episode, consider leaving a rating. It truly helps. Thank you again for listening. >>Join the waitlist for my private parenting membership - https://www.themompsychologist.com/membership   >>Join my email newsletter: https://www.themompsychologist.com/newsletter  >>Discipline Workshop (free): https://www.themompychologist.com/workshop  >>Instagram: https://instagram.com/themompsychologist >>YouTube: https://youtube.com/c/themompsychologist  

In this episode, I share how to raise critical thinkers using my DCM Framework. Hope you enjoy! If you liked this episode, consider leaving a rating. It truly helps. Thank you again for listening. >>Join the waitlist for my private parenting membership - https://www.themompsychologist.com/membership >>Parenting From Within: Letters From Dr. Jazmine (written version): https://www.themompsychologist.com/blog  >>Join my email newsletter: https://www.themompsychologist.com/newsletter  >>Discipline Workshop (free): https://www.themompychologist.com/workshop  >>Instagram: https://instagram.com/themompsychologist >>YouTube: https://youtube.com/c/themompsychologist  

If you enjoyed this episode, consider leaving a rating. It truly helps. Thank you again for listening. This episode was originally a YouTube Video. You can watch here: https://youtu.be/KRtbq6g60C4 Parenting From Within: Letters From Dr. Jazmine (written version): www.themompsychologist.com/blog Discipline Workshop (free): www.themompychologist.com/workshop Instagram: https://instagram.com/themompsychologistYouTube: https://youtube.com/c/themompsychologist

Our child's behaviors can often feel like a mystery and it’s hard to know how to respond when they do confusing things like break toys, get aggressive, not cooperate, or run around in circles all of a sudden. I'm I’m here to help with that! In this week's episode, I'll help demystify confusing yet common child behaviors so that you can feel more effective and confident in your parenting approach! PS: Don’t forget to check out my free discipline workshop, “How to Get Your Child to Listen Without Yelling” - www.themompsychologist.com/workshop

In this episode, I'll break down the most common mistakes parents make when setting boundaries/disciplining their young children (and what to try instead) so that you increase cooperation without sacrificing your mental health! PS: Don’t forget to check out my free discipline workshop, “How to Get Your Child to Listen Without Yelling” - www.themompsychologist.com/workshop

So one of my all time favorite values I try to instill in my children is the value of perseverance and hard work. It's a topic we regularly circle back to so you can imagine my shock when my 6-year old once blurted out "I'm stupid" while trying to learn a new skill. In this week's episode I share a quick story time of how I handled her statement so that she walked away feeling: Understood and connected with me, more equipped to understand how her mind works, and more self-confident and willing to try hard things. // Don’t forget to check out my free anger eBook - "Your 3-Step Plan When Your Child Gets Angry or Aggressive” www.themompsychologist.com/ebook

Here's your easy to follow 3-step plan for when your kids get aggressive! // Don’t forget to check out my free anger eBook - "Your 3-Step Plan When Your Child Gets Angry or Aggressive” www.themompsychologist.com/ebook When our kids get aggressive, it's sooo tempting to respond reactively and:- Yelling & getting aggressive back. - Asking questions ("Why are you doing this??") - Trying to reason with them when they're in an emotional state (e.g., "Well you know we don't have dessert before dinner.")- Lecturing them or telling them to "Stop!" - Ignoring them and pretending it's not happening. But I'm here to be your voice of reason and help you with this!

Don’t forget to check out my free anger eBook - "Your 3-Step Plan When Your Child Gets Angry or Aggressive” www.themompsychologist.com/ebook I don’t know about y’all but as a mom of 3, I have a no tolerance policy for demanding behavior. If we don't lovingly intervene *in the moment,* children learn quick that making demands is how they get their needs. In this week's episode, I share my easy 3-step process to curbing demanding and impatient behaviors so our children can learn how to respectfully ask for what they need.

Don’t forget to check out my free anger eBook - "Your 3-Step Plan When Your Child Gets Angry or Aggressive” www.themompsychologist.com/ebook // It's super common for kids to see problematic behaviors at school and want to try them out at home. Whether they're aware of it or not, they're trying to process what they observed and learn more about the behavior by testing out how we will respond to it. When done correctly, these conversations have the ability to:Increase our child's social awarenessFoster connection and trust between parent-child Help them re-think their self-concept and position themselves as "leaders" rather than "followers In this week's episode, I share how I address negative behaviors picked up from school using my clear 4-step process.

"Rude" is a subjective term, but any time you interpret your child's language as "unfriendly", "rude", or "unkind," here's what to say to help them learn better communication. I don't know about y'all, but I'm a positive parent with a no tolerance attitude around disrespectful language & behavior.  It's my cue to step in and teach because I know the more I allow this behavior, the more it spreads.  Yes, let's get your needs met, but let's do this respectfully.  In this episode, I share my 5-step process to curbing "rude" behavior so that we can intentionally raise self-aware kids who know how to communicate their wants and needs to others in respectful ways. Don’t forget to check out my free anger eBook - "Your 3-Step Plan When Your Child Gets Angry or Aggressive” www.themompsychologist.com/ebook

Teaching kids how to manage their anger comes down to helping them shift their mindset so they can change their choices.  Rather than anger being viewed as a “bad” feeling, let’s come to see it as a messenger here to help us. Then we can channel the anger towards effective communication, expression, and self-care.  In this episode, I share 3 crucial skills you must teach your kids when it comes to anger & tips to help you get started. Don’t forget to check out my free anger eBook - "Your 3-Step Plan When Your Child Gets Angry or Aggressive” www.themompsychologist.com/ebook

Yes, spending intentional 1:1 time with our kids every day *is* sooo important, namely for preventing behavioral issues and enhancing connection. But as our children age, connection is about sooo much more.  In this episode, I'm going to break down 5+ ways to connect with your child in muchhhhhh deeper ways. When done consistently, these things lead to secure attachment because they build trust and intimacy in the parent-child relationship.  If you need more help with positive discipline, I have a FREE workshop, How to Get Your Kids to Listen Without Yelling, where we work through discipline and setting consequences with intention and respect. I provide you with the tools you need to create a happy home where cooperation happens without the struggle.

I know it's easy to feel overwhelmed, embarrassed and upset at your child when their teacher approaches you about their misbehavior.  There’s so many potential reasons why your child is misbehaving so it's important to first focus on gathering more information from their teacher before discussing solutions. Remember: behavior is just a symptom to a larger problem. Think of it as the smoke to a blazing fire. Yes, it's what gets our attention and what we tend to notice first but there's so much else we need to be paying attention to if we want to help our child thrive in school. In this week's episode, I breakdown the top 6 questions to ask daycare staff or school teachers if they approach you about your child's misbehavior in the classroom. These questions will not only help you understand the behavior on a deeper level but also inform how you both can intervene to help your child get back on track. PS: Tune into the 3-part podcast miniseries hosted by ME with The Skimm X Whirlpool called Breaking the Cycle - https://bit.ly/skimm-this-podcast - all on the hidden educational crisis of chronic absenteeism.

So lately, I’ve noticed that my 5-year old has been doing a lot of “testy” behaviors like: Not respecting her sister’s body boundaries.  Competing with her sister (e.g., “Mommy let me get this first.”)  Moving really slowwww (or not at all) when I give directions.  Getting “stuck” in whining/sulking when upset. Lowww frustration tolerance.  There are sooo many different ways to approach this behavior so in this week's episode I want to share some "behind the scenes" of how I've been approaching her behaviors lately. Don’t forget to check out my free discipline workshop, “How to Get Your Child to Listen Without Yelling” - www.themompsychologist.com/workshop

When tension runs high, it's tempting to match our children's emotions and meet their anger with anger but it rarely works. All we're left with is disconnection and lots of guilt.  Instead, we are best served by focusing on de-escalation. In this episode, I give you a roadmap to refer back to again and again when navigating your child's intense emotions.

Instead of avoiding screens, teach your kids how to have a healthy relationship with them! Focus on building a foundation of open communication, digital safety & healthy screen habits.  And the earlier we start teaching these things, the better!  To help you get started, here are 4 practical ways to teach your kids about healthy digital habits!

Don’t forget to check out my free discipline workshop, “How to Get Your Child to Listen Without Yelling” Navigating our children's intense emotions can sometimes feel like we're walking on eggshells. We try to connect and validate but it rarely feeling like it's "working." And then sometimes we say certain buzzwords or ask simple questions and it REALLY sets our child off. In this week's episode, I explore the top 4 things your child doesn't want to hear when they're frustrated and angry and WHY. I also share alternatives to try out next time to connect and re-direct behavior.

Don’t forget to check out my free discipline workshop, “How to Get Your Child to Listen Without Yelling” - www.themompsychologist.com/workshop It's morning time and you just need to get your child to put on their shoes and jacket but they're dawdling... Ahh!!! You find yourself yell, "Hurry up!!!" Or maybe it's the evening and you're trying to wrap things up for the day. You're exhausted so you blurt out, "C'mon, c'mon. Let's go!!!" Only to realize it doesn't work. I know it's tempting to fall back on shouting at our kids to hurry when we're in a rush. But it often just leads to more dawdling because now they feel pressured and can sense our impatience. In this week's episode, I share 4 things to try saying instead of "Hurry up!!" to help your child get things done quickly. And remember, it's not that we NEVER say these things. It's just that the more tools we have, the better! Let me know down in the comments which one you're going to try!

I know a lot of focus is on helping kids make better choices so that we raise respectful humans and I love this. But I also think that we must balance these conversations with holding ourselves accountable & shining a light on the ways in which we influence situations. Here's the thing - We are all "guilty" of triggering our children. This is not about shaming ourselves ("I'm such a bad parent. Every time I read parenting content I'm reminded of how much I'm failing."). This is about taking accountability for the ways in which we may be triggering our child's anger without even realizing it. At the end of the day, parenting is about our relationship with our child. So as long as we are *only* focusing on our child and the ways in which they aren't measuring up, we will miss opportunities to take accountability (and thus see growth). In this week's episode, I share the 5 most common ways we trigger our child to either lash out in anger or shut down - and most importantly, simple tweaks you can make to your parenting approach to add more clarity and connection to your relationship with your child.

Now that it's officially gift giving season, I wanted to be sure to address the issue of teaching kids manners.   I know it's so tempting to demand our kids tell the gift giver THANK YOU. And I know during these moments we want to make sure our child shows their gratitude for the things they receive. But rather than force gratitude, I'm a huge fan of teaching kids  *why* showing our appreciation for others' kindness is important and modeling the skills we want to teach them.   Now hear me out - I'm not against prompting our kids to say 'Thank you' and I'm definitely a fan of teaching our kids' manners.  Let's just be sure to mix in some teaching and modeling. And remember, kids can show their appreciation with their actions (hugs, high fives) not just their words. So in this episode, I'll share tips on how to teach kids gratitude and things to say during those awkward moments when your child receives a gift and says...nothing... 😑 // Don’t forget to check out my free discipline workshop, “How to Get Your Child to Listen Without Yelling” - www.themompsychologist.com/workshop //

We talk all year long about positive parenting but I wanted to be sure to provide holiday-specific tips because this time of year tends to bring JOY and CHALLENGES.   It's exciting but can also feel stressful, busy and overwhelming for both parents and kids.  What I want to first point out is that if your child seems more difficult this time of the year than normal, this is a commonly due to underlying stress. Children aren't really good communicators and can't sit us down and say, "Mom, dad, I'm feeling stressed right now. I feel like I have no down time and seeing all these people feels both exciting and overwhelming. I need some help coping..." Ha! Wouldn't that be nice! Instead, they will show their stress with their behavior, like crankiness, sassiness, defiance, clinginess, and of course, tantrums. 😰 So the key is look out for these signs and when we see them, try our best to lower their stress. Of course, we can't prevent ALL stress – we just want to be more mindful of this especially during the holiday season. So in this week's episode, I'll share my top 3 positive parenting tips for preventing stress during this holiday season!   // Don’t forget to check out my free discipline workshop, “How to Get Your Child to Listen Without Yelling” - www.themompsychologist.com/workshop //

My two preschoolers started school back in August and we are still getting in the swing of things. We were late the first day of school, due to all the traffic, & it was literally my worst nightmare. 😅😂 Now that we've been practicing our school morning routine for several months, I thought it would be fun to share some behind the scenes of what our mornings tend to look like. I'm always curious how other parents manage the hectic morning routine so I figured many of you might be curious how we navigate hectic school day mornings with two preschoolers.  Now huge disclaimer - No mornings are ever perfect or exactly the same. This is the general flow we usually follow that's been working for us, but by no means, is our routine the be all, end all. //Don’t forget to check out my free discipline workshop, “How to Get Your Child to Listen Without Yelling” - www.themompsychologist.com/workshop //  

Ah, chores! Similar to mealtime, bedtime, and potty training, chores are a perfect breeding ground for power struggles!   Now I actually like to frame chores as family contributions because it helps set the stage for why we do these things in the first place.  It's important we establish routines around family contributions because it sends our kids the clear message that they matter! Our kids come to learn that they play a huge role in keeping the family running smoothly and their contributions make a difference (which boosts their self esteem and feelings of significance). It also teaches them:    Life skills  Work ethic  Appreciate the work of others  Curbs entitlement  Teaches independence   I'm a huge fan of beginning to teach this practice during the toddler years because again, it sends a strong message that everyone contributes to the family (all year long) no matter how young or busy you are. But I get it, it's not always so easy to motivate our kids to actually want to do their chores so in this week's episode, I discuss: The best (and easiest) way to enlist more cooperation when it comes to chores Simple ways to start a chore routine 3 tips for enlisting more cooperation during chores Don’t forget to download my free chore checklists for a list of age appropriate chores and a chore chart to help you get started! - www.themompsychologist.com/chores

I think one of the most powerful gifts we can give our kids is the gift of knowing how to be smart with our money. After all, money touches every area of our lives (whether we talk about it or not) and it also ties into our overall sense of safety & security. Yet, did you know... The majority of families tend to shy away from having conversations about it (even though kids begin to form their core beliefs & habits about money by age 7!).  And I know, there's a lot of buzz around whether or not kids should to get an allowance.   In this week's episode, I share:-Whether or not I think giving kids an allowance is a good idea-The one huge (& common) mistake parents make when it comes to teaching about money-The huge paradigm shift that must happen in your family when you start teaching about money-Helpful resources and tools to teach your kids about money-And so much more! Resources Mentioned: https://a.co/7yxcc5o  // Join the waitlist for my private parent coaching community, The Mom Sisterhood - http://www.themompsychologist.com/sisterhood // Don’t forget to download my free chore checklists for a list of age appropriate chores and a chore chart to help you get started! - www.themompsychologist.com/chores    

I know for many of us, becoming a calmer parent is one of our top priorities.  And I love this for us because this places less of the focus on trying to fix and control our child and instead, focuses on what we CAN control, which is our own behaviors and choices as parents.   But let's be real - Handling our parenting triggers and staying calm in the moment is a lot easier said than done.   And we're not always going to get this right. In this week's episode, I want to share a simple step by step guide to managing parenting triggers in the moment.  Towards the end of the video, I also share my own personal experience with anger and what helps me to manage my own parenting triggers. Don’t forget to check out my free resource, "A Simple Guide to Becoming a Calmer Parent" -- www.themompsychologist.com/calmparenting

Let's face it - The pressure on us parents is endless and we're often stressed, which makes it hard to stay calm. Though I know, becoming a calmer parent is often what we want MOST. So why is it so easy to feel triggered and angry at our kids even when we don't *want* to be? In parenting, anger is used to defend against our sense of self.  Anger makes us feel powerful and it makes us feel like we're DOING something to change our circumstance (And help our kids learn better).  But oftentimes, our anger backfires because it escalates the situation and leaves us feeling guilty and ashamed. So in this week's episode, I share 3 common reasons why you're so angry with your kids (with examples and thoughts many parents have). Understanding the WHY is the first best step to becoming a calmer parent. Hope you enjoy! //FREE Resource: A Simple Guide to Becoming a Calmer Parent: http://www.themompsychologist.com/calmparenting //