Episodes
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Not By Pizza Things: Podcast Episode 270
Where is the thing when you need it? You know, the thing that cuts your food? No, not a knife. But there are no knives either. Where did all the utensils go? Are they all sitting dirty in the sink? We shouldn’t have to use our hands like hand animals. The Mustache Rangers go on a scavenger hunt…
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Stand Up: Podcast Episode 269
Stand-up comedy can be difficult. Unless you bring all your co-workers. Then they’ll all pretend that you did a great job when they see you at work the next day. But what if you put secret recording devices on all your co-workers to hear what they really think of you? That would be expensive. If...
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Return of the King: Podcast Episode 268
Suprise. The post Return of the King: Podcast Episode 268 appeared first on The Mustache Rangers Podcast.
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One Last Time: Podcast Episode 267
The Mustache Rangers defeat Smaug in the gripping conclusion to the trilogy based loosely on the works of J.R.R. Tolkien. Thank you all. The post One Last Time: Podcast Episode 267 appeared first on The Mustache Rangers Podcast.
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The Desolation of the Mustache Rangers: Podcast Episode 266
This is the second to last episode of the Mustache Rangers podcast. It’s about doing the laundry. Sort of. Enjoy it or don’t. It’s all the same to the universe. Enjoy. The post The Desolation of the Mustache Rangers: Podcast Episode 266 appeared first on The Mustache Rangers Podcast.
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Pop Culture Wars: Podcast Episode 265
A whodunit the likes of which John Grisham only dreamed. Phooneybaum and Bastidious must rack their brains to figure out the culprit in the daring unicorn figurine breakage case. Could it be the butler or the chamber maid? Or perhaps the scorned lover! You’ll have to listen to find out. P.S. It…
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Ready, Set, Wang: Podcast Episode 264
Some episodes of the Mustache Rangers are great for the whole family. This is not one of them. This is for kids only. No, wait. The other way around. This is specifically not for children. That would have been a mess, huh? Glad we fixed that. In this episode, Phooneybaum tries to guess what is in...
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Workshopping the Workshop: Episode 263
We can all agree that motivational speakers are con artists and that workshops are scams. Unless those speakers or workshop leaders are from the Mustache Rangers. Then you’d be a fool not to pay any price demanded for the charisma and knowledge they provide. A workshop in its infancy and the...
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Fancy Man: Podcast Episode 262
When a podcast dies, the number of mourners at the funeral is equal to the number of iTunes reviews it has divided by 1,000. The 0.055 people at the Mustache Rangers podcast funeral made for a rather sad celebration, which is why the Mustache Rangers made the decision to give death. The Mustache...
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Test Out: Podcast Episode 261
School is a very special time in a child’s life. It’s when they really learn how to be embarrassed. You think Uncle Rick tickling you until you wet your pants is shameful? Just wait until you express an individual sense of style! The Mustache Rangers explore teaching and testing in this podcast...
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Massage: Podcast Episode 260
Misogyny and campfires are the main focus of this, the first Mustache Rangers podcast of 2013. We’re sorry we’ve been gone so long, but we were so anxious for Arrested Development to return we couldn’t concentrate. Did you know that misogyny still exists? And it’s mainly men who are the cause?...
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Give Up On Time Travel: Episode 259
You may love time travel movies, but they don’t make any sense. Don’t worry about it. Your brain and the writer’s brain are too dumb to make heads or tails of time travel. It’s the limitation of this biological sponge in our head. You fill a sponge with protein lines and jab it with electricity…
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Eat More: Podcast Episode 258
Diet fads come and go as surely as the tides and bell bottoms. You can say “bootcut” but you’re not fooling anybody, the Gap. But getting back to diets, everyone is looking for the quick fix. The superfood or the magic bacteria that will eat your insides, but just enough so that you look pretty…
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Opinions: Podcast Episode 257
Other people’s opinions are the topic of discussion in this Mustache Rangers podcast episode. Interesting fact. Did you know that everybody has an opinion? It’s true! Even babies are all, like, “what’s with all the light and the lack of amniotic fluid out here?” That was just translated with a…
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Holiday Cards: Podcast Episode 256
Cards, books, and money. Isn’t that really what the holidays are about? You receive cards that look good on your mantel until the year rolls over. You receive books that you’ll never read. Or you get a card full of money. Really, those are the only three options. Sure, there may be a bike thrown…
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Go to Hell: Podcast Episode 255
Hell and decorating are the topics of this Mustache Rangers podcast episode. More decorating than hell, but “go to decoration school” isn’t a very catchy podcast title. Maybe you have a better idea for a title. Well, you can shove it. We don’t want to hear it. Make your own damn podcast. Leave us...
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Andrew Zimmern: Podcast Episode 254
Andrew Zimmern, host of Bizarre Foods and the Go Fork Yourself podcast, takes time out of his busy schedule to deliver some very urgent news to the Mustache Rangers. Will it be food related news? Yes. Sorry, spoiler alert. You can see Andrew Zimmern live at HUGE Improv Theater, home of the…
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Secure: Podcast Episode 253
Security cameras, Big Brother, and ghosts invade the personal space of the Mustache Rangers in this podcast episode. This is the episode that was actually recorded for Halloween. Whoops? Enjoy it anyway. Don’t worry, there is no candy involved. You won’t have to suspend your disbelief too much.…
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Get Political: Podcast Episode 252
A podcast about politics the day before a major election? It’s like we planned this or something. Don’t worry. Your values won’t be challenged. It’s mostly talk about teeth and aspirations. You know, things you talk about every day. Anywho, enjoy this Mustache Rangers podcast episode. The post…
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Trustbusters: Podcast Episode 251
It is almost Halloween, and you know what that means? Podcasts with a vaguely spooky theme, but not really! This podcast is really about board games. If there is anything better than playing a board game, it’s listening to two people bicker about it. So listen, already! And don’t forget! The...
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Podcast Episode 250 Live: Podcast Episode 250: Redundant
The milestone that is a quarter of a milestone, the Mustache Rangers have reached episode 250 of their celebrated podcast. Enjoy this special episode, recorded live in front of an audience at HUGE Improv Theater in Minneapolis, MN. The video of the show, including a look backstage, is still...
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Spider Hats: Podcast Episode 249
With our feet stuck well into the muck that is October, it’s only proper to have an arachnid-centric episode. If you live in a place where spiders can’t rot your skin if you’re bit, you have no right to be afraid of spider. In case you were wondering. Spiders and hats will bring you smiles in…
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Get a Bonus: Podcast Episode 248
Temperatures are discussed in this podcast episode. After all, we know what our audience wants. Lots of talk about being too hot or too cold. Afghans aren’t brought up, but they are a great way to keep you both warm and cold at the same time. We don’t know why we’re telling you this. Listen to…
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Beard Patrolmen: Podcast Episode 247
The “gentlemen” from the Shoddy Radio podcast join the Mustache Rangers this week playing the Beard Patrolmen. For those of you who didn’t see the live show the Mustache Rangers did that one time, the Beard Patrolmen are the greatest enemies of the Mustache Rangers. Speaking of live shows, the...
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Can’t Imagine: Podcast Episode 246
We know what you’re thinking. Where have you been, Mustache Rangers? But you thought it with a real twinge of attitude, so we won’t answer you. Next time, when you think of something you might possibly ask, you had better check yourself before you Rex Urselph. Don’t know how that phrase became so...
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Jasmine Memories: Podcast Episode 245
Scents and tastes can strongly evoke memories and emotions. But can a taste take a memory away? Probably not. But that won’t stop the Mustache Rangers from going on and on about it in this podcast episode. Honestly, can’t they shut up for, like, 2 minutes? Some of us are trying to sleep. The post...
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Tell It Again: Podcast Episode 244
Facebook is a giant waste of time, second only to listening to people tell stories you’ve already heard. If there were a way to monetize that, we’d be billionaires by now. But you can’t sell ad space in old stories. The Mustache Rangers tell old stories in this podcast episode. Enjoy it in your…
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Advertise: Podcast Episode 243
It may comes as quite a shock to you that advertisers bend the truth to get their products sold. Or, it may come as no shock at all. We can’t assume to know your educational background. Do you know what badminton is? Badminton looks like fun, but it is terrible. That’s what advertising does to…
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Squeamish: Podcast Episode 242
It’s easy to be squeamish. After all, who knows what the cat dropped into your shoe last night? The Mustache Rangers explore the feeling of squeamishness in this podcast. Have you checked your shoes yet? You should. And cedar shoe trees would really clear this whole situation up. The post...
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Remove Pants: Podcast Episode 241
Monica Hamburg of the S&M Rants Podcast joins the Mustache Rangers in this podcast where the freedom of the human form is discovered and uncovered. Or maybe it’s just a bunch of giggling. I mean, all that flesh can be awfully funny. So many lumps of different shapes and sizes. Enjoy. The post...
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Black Tie: Podcast Episode 240
Black tie events are fun, probably. We’ve never been to one. There are probably a lot of hi-jinks there, mostly involving punch bowls and swimming pools with retractable covers. This podcast features assumptions about black tie events, mostly based on movies. Mostly based on Kubrick movies.…
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Create Jobs: Podcast Episode 239
Creating jobs isn’t easy, as this week’s podcast will attest. Sure, you could simply copy the jobs that are already there, but that is boring. If you’re doing it right, you need to think of a job that has never existed before. Like bread wearer or box car kisser. We’re just spit-balling here....
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Etsy: Podcast Episode 238
You could make a millions dollars by stealing all the ideas that the Mustache Rangers have in their podcast. And then the Mustache Rangers would make those million dollars by suing you. But they’d smile while suing you. And really, isn’t a smile like a hug? Would anyone bad hug you? NO! Enjoy…
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Last Resort: Podcast Episode 237
We really don’t know why you’re reading this. Podcasts are an audio medium. Just listen to the show already. You know these descriptions never have anything to do with what goes on in the episode anyway. You should have learned that by now. Anyway, how are you? It’s been a while. We took up a...
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Snap: Podcast Episode 236
Waiters, take note. You are legally obligated to pee into the soup of anyone who snaps at you. How else will those people ever learn to stop snapping their fingers at people? This is your duty, waitrons. The Mustache Rangers deals with snaps and claps in this week’s episode. Store it in your…
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Brett Favre: Podcast Episode 235
There are certain things that Brett Favre is known for. Throwing a football, for instance. Or wearing rings, as an example. Today’s podcast is about the other thing. You know what we’re talking about. There’s something about Brett Favre. The post Brett Favre: Podcast Episode 235 appeared first on...
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Assume: Podcast Episode 234
Assumptions are what differentiate man from the beasts. Squirrels assume that tree branch will hold their weight. Humans draw a diagram about why a tree branch can’t hold their weight. Oh humans. Just jump! The Mustache Rangers assume many things in this week’s podcast adventure. We assume. The...
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Ranger Normal: Podcast Episode 233
The Mustache Rangers are back, and they’re joined by the crew from the Sex is Fun podcast. So prepare your ears accordingly. Perhaps you are at work. Try not being at work. Okay. At home now? Good. In fact, if you need MORE Mustache Rangers this week, you can hear a special Mustache Rangers…
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The Pits: Podcast Episode 232
Nobody likes snakes. Even the dudes who wear snakes as a fashion statement are scared to death of them. They simply think the constant risk of death is worth it if a pretty lady looks their way. Bonus points if she looks their way with an expression that is not disgust. The Mustache Rangers talk...
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Fear: Podcast Episode 231
Fear. Does it hurt more than it helps? Sandwiches. Have you had more bad sandwiches than good? Chairs. Still trust them? Listen to this week’s Mustache Rangers episode and you may start to question everything you understand about everything. The post Fear: Podcast Episode 231 appeared first on…
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Quest: Podcast Episode 230
Skyrim and Diablo 3 are the games of the hour. In Skyrim and Diablo, you go on quests. In this week’s Mustache Rangers podcast episode, they talk about quests. Does that mean that everyone who plays Skyrim or Diablo 3 should listen to the Mustache Rangers? It couldn’t hurt. The post Quest…
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Take Liberties: Podcast Episode 229
Everyone tells stories. Even rocks, if you put a robot mouth on them and tell the robot mouth to say approximately what you think a rock would say. It’s mostly “I’m dry” or “I’m wet.” Rocks are very aware of their hydration levels. The Mustache Rangers jabber on about stories and how they should…
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The Secondary Objective: Podcast Episode 228
Video games make their influence known as the Mustache Rangers work on confirming their secondary objective in this podcast episode. Will they have to hack three computers or find the secret music box? You’ll have to listen to find out. Or have a courtroom stenographer type out this week’s…
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Take Flight: Podcast Episode 227
The serious topic of body alteration is used for the light fun in this Mustache Rangers podcast episode. Did you see that guy who put magnets under his skin so he could attach some devil horns? I mean, really. Come on, guy. Give that surgery money to me! I’d spend it on so much gum! The post Take...
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Anti-Comedy: Podcast Episode 226
The Comedy Album and artistic interpretation are the main talking points in this Mustache Rangers podcast episode. And the squabbling. There is always a bit of that, isn’t there? You think, over hundreds of years, you’d eventually work out the kinks in a friendship. The reality is, the kinks keep...
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Change-Up: Podcast Episode 225
Terrance Day is winter solstice tradition that keeps the Mustache Rangers going. Aside from a genetically altered panda delivering gifts, very little information has come out about the traditions of Terrance Day. Until this podcast! Bring your loved ones around the fire and listen to this holiday...
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Turn Inside Out: Podcast Episode 224
Internal organs, what they can do and what they can’t do, are the pain topics of contention on this Mustache Rangers podcast episode. Now, keep in mind, the Mustache Rangers are not doctors. At least, not doctors in the traditional sense. If you would consider “someone who eats a certain brand of...
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Weak: Podcast Episode 223
Denim and weakness. What do they have in common? Why would you read the answer in a blog post when you could listen to it in a podcast? Today is your lucky day, because the Mustache Rangers explore the topics of denim and weakness! All in one podcast episode! For free! How lucky are you? You…
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Interrupted: Podcast Episode 222
We can’t blame you to listening to the Minneapolis St Paul Magazine best podcast of 2011. We would too, if we weren’t living it. In this podcast episode, the Mustache Rangers learn how rude it is to interrupt someone. And then some other stuff happens. Metal sound provided by acclivity at...
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Get Graphic: Podcast Episode 221
Graphic novels are for everybody. Sure, that what the geek at the store keeps telling you, but that doesn’t make it less true. The Mustache Rangers work on their very own graphic novel in this comedy podcast adventure. The post Get Graphic: Podcast Episode 221 appeared first on The Mustache…
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