The People v. Firefly

Sometimes there's a man... I won't say a hero, 'cause, what's a hero? But sometimes, there's a man. And I'm talkin' about the Joss here... A way out west there was a fella, fella I want to tell you about, fella by the name of Joseph Herbert Walker Texas Ranger Antonio Gonzalez Whedon... he called himself the Joss. Please enjoy the finale of our coverage of Firefly. The Grand Jury has voted and now for all time this strange, lonely wanderer will either wear the gleaming white hat called SHINY or the rotting knit beanie called HEINIE.  Final arguments in the forms of songs, heartfelt discussions, amicus briefs from beyond time and space.  AND the post credits reveal of our next TWO dockets! (What shows we be talking about next) Want to be on the next grand jury?! Join our Patreon! www.patreon.com/shadeaux

As is often the case in this here vale of tears, genre shows end -- and end without a chance to finish the story they were telling. But every so often, a dadgummed angel flies down on wings of gossamer silver and give that show one last chance and a few dozen million dollars to right that wrong. One movie to sum it ALL up, to finish.the.story. Do J.H.W.A.G.X Whedon and his team of miscreants pull it off? Do they even come close? Does Serenity’s end bring peace and balance as Firefly’s end? Is it SHINY or is it HEINIE? Join the GRAND JURY: www.patreon.com/shadeaux

In the de-facto series finale, the crew of the Firefly are accosted by a man most scurrilous, but with unmatched charisma. Is this a satisfying episode that shows off the strengths of the show? Is this a satisfying finale for the years before there was a capstone movie made? A lion? Is Firefly SHINY or is it HEINIE? Join the GRAND JURY: www.patreon.com/shadeaux

I want to shine I want to Hein I’ve been a space cowboy For a heart of gold It’s these episodes I never give That keep me searching For a heart of gold And I’m getting old. Is Firefly SHINY or is it HEINIE? Join the GRAND JURY: www.patreon.com/shadeaux

Corpses be corpsin’! Zoe and Mal get a special delivery of some much needed world building backfill along with one generic dirtbag. Is it SHINY or is it HEINIE? Join the GRAND JURY: www.patreon.com/shadeaux

Oh boy, Saffron is back! Hooray! A heist! No complications here. No emotional traumas. Just fun times. Oh boy! Is Firefly SHINY or is it HEINIE? Join the GRAND JURY: www.patreon.com/shadeaux

Niska! He’s back! And he’s here to torture our heroes into revealing interpersonal problems and psycho-sexual hangups! Are the crew of Firefly bad enough dudes to rescue Mal and Wash from this preposterous villain’s clutches? Is River’s character developing or devolving? Is Firefly SHINY or is it HEINIE? Join the GRAND JURY: www.patreon.com/shadeaux

It’s heist time! Simon has a plan to get River into a futuristic scanner sort of deal and steal some high-end pharmaceuticals int he process. Plans! Montages! Betrayals?! Will Ariel give us a glimpse of a Core planet in all its technocratic glory while giving the glum doctor a chance to shine? Or will it look like a mall in Vancouver with floodlights pointed at it? Is it SHINY or is it HEINIE? Join the GRAND JURY: www.patreon.com/shadeaux

When is too soon for a flashback episode? You know, when we learn how this crazy gang got together??? The West Wing waited until the beginning of Season 2. How satisfying to learn about the early days of the Bartlett campaign, all framed by the President and Josh Lyman’s recovery from gunshot wounds. Masterful storytelling, deepening our affection for the well-established ensemble. Does Out of Gas pull off the same trick with only a handful of episodes in the tank? Let’s find out! Shiny? Heinie? Or a rare verdict of: Bradley Whitford?!? Is Firefly SHINY or is it HEINIE? Join the GRAND JURY: www.patreon.com/shadeaux

Here we see the beloved tale of an absolute bastard coming to grips with the fact that his legacy of honor, heroism, and glory is a big pile of lies. No, not Joseph Herbert Walker Antonio Gustavo Whedon! Jayne! Jayne Cobb! Why oh why would you mix those two up? The lawslingers grapple mightily with the text -- and even mightlier with that damn song. Is Firefly SHINY or is it HEINIE? Join the GRAND JURY: www.patreon.com/shadeaux

Strap in for a little bit of peril as the crew of the Firefly finally face an interesting villain. Hijinks, flouncing, and a general miasma of ‘oh shucks’ pervade. Will the court be dazzled by Christina Hendricks? (Yes!) Is Firefly SHINY or is it HEINIE? Join the GRAND JURY: www.patreon.com/shadeaux

Wouldst thou like to live deliciously? This episode is that very witch. Surely only the influence of the one called Morningstar could have produced such a strange, rambunctious tale! Shiny? Heinie? WITCH. Is Firefly SHINY or is it HEINIE? Join the GRAND JURY: www.patreon.com/shadeaux

Uh oh, it’s that one. The one with the dress! You know, Kaylee’s dress! The episode that launched a thousand (more) cosplays. Plus our man Mal reveals he’s a pretty shitty duelist (with swords) all things considered. How did we feel about this one? Is Firefly SHINY or is it HEINIE? Join the GRAND JURY: www.patreon.com/shadeaux

The plot thinnens as Firefly works its way through more western tropes. The court examines the Reavers, the unending charisma of the main cast, and whether or not Jonathan could hack it as an interior designer. Is Firefly SHINY or is it HEINIE? Join the GRAND JURY: www.patreon.com/shadeaux

You’re telling me there’s a TRAIN and we have to do some sort of criminal TASK? Unbelievable, these western tropes are filling up the abyss of space like overflowing sasparilla! Is Firefly SHINY or is it HEINIE? Join the GRAND JURY: www.patreon.com/shadeaux

Once upon a time in the West of Space, there was a man. The deadliest crackshot this side of the Mesa Verde. Rooting. Tooting. Roping. Milking. Bricklaying. All of that cowboy shit. He was a legend. A legend of hard leather and gunslinger glory. Unfortunately, this podcast has nothing to do with that wandering stranger. Please enjoy our critical analysis and unbiased palaver about everyone’s favorite sci-fi/western casserole: Firefly. Is Firefly SHINY or is it HEINIE? Join the GRAND JURY: www.patreon.com/shadeaux

At last, the content faucet begins to turn and these are the first drippings. For FIREFLY we realized that the main topic we would constantly be circling was the age-old ‘can you separate the Art from the Artist’ debate. Here we try to tackle that topic first - and while SHOCKINGLY we don’t resolve that debate for all time -- this does give at least a solid summary of how we’ll attempt to approach the rest of this brief. Join the GRAND JURY: www.patreon.com/shadeaux