The Restory of History's Mysteries

GREETINGS LISTENERS! It is I, NHB-3 as they say in the cataloging industry, bringing you the FINAL INSTALLMENT and STUNNING SEASON FINALE of The Restory of History's Mysteries! Join me as I visit Anne Bonny, Annie Oakley and Anne Boleyn (maybe?) in this, the long-awaited...ANNE-IVERSARY!

HUZZAH! THIS IS IT, LISTENERS! As this is the second-to-last episode of the first season, I decree that THIS is in fact a PENULTIMATIUM! You MUST listen to this episode in order to understand what the heck is going to happen in THE NEXT EPISODE! It's much like a serial but without J.R. being shot! Oh and Arthur Conan Doyle and Harry Houdini are in this episode. AND SO AM I! NILES! I'M FAMOUS! On the Restory...of History's Mysteries.

LISTENERS! DISCERNING LISTENERS! It is I, Niles Higginsbottom Barrier -the- Third! Join me as we travel back in time to try and get to the bottom of whether or not Shakespeare's play Julius Ceasar was botched, bungled, bettered, battered or buttered by NONE OTHER THAN QUAN ELIZABETH THE FIRST! THE QUAN OF ENGLAND!

Hello! Yes, it's me, Niles Higginsbottom Barrier the third. Join me as we peel away the layers of truth to find the SECRETS hidden from us about the RENDLESHAM FOREST INCIDENT! GROWNUP ADULT NOTE: Aaron here. I had to update the track, since I realized a chunk of Niles's dialogue was missing at the end. Fixed now - enjoy!!

In this most transcendental episode of The Restory of History's Mysteries, our hero - Niles Haversbottom Barrier -the- Third - meets none other than Siddhartha Guatama, who, through spiritual enlightenment, becomes Buddha! Niles may or may not have assisted with this.

MY DEAR LISTENERS! Niles Haversbottom Barrier -the- 3rd here, with what is, quite possibly, THE MOST GROUNDBREAKING EPISODE OF "THE RESTORY OF HISTORY'S MYSTERIES" EVER!...EVER! Believe me when I tell you - this episode has everything! Divine intervention? Check. Drunk painters? Check! TWO narrators?! DOUBLE CHECK! Produced with the use of the diephonic microphone, this episode took more than 3 months to produce, mostly because of all of the temporal activitiy! Yes...let's go with that excuse! So sit back...enjoy...relax...pour yourself some no-longer-available 1400s Chateua Bordeaux and enjoy THE RESTORY...of History's Mysteries.

Good Evening, Gentle Listeners! Tonight, I - Niles Higglesbiggle Barrier the 3rd - will take you on an epic voyage to a disgusting 1940s New York Brownstone, in which the world's first case of hoarding - popularized by my interviewees tonight, the Collyer Brothers - was ever discovered! I lend them a hand with the help of a special guest star who is proficient in cockamamory!

LISTENERS! I wish to take you back to a quaint little yellow house - affectionately titled "The Yellow House" by its proprietors - in one of the most touching episodes of The Restory of History's Mysteries yet! Your esteemed journalist, narrator and raison d'etre, Niles Haversbottom Barrier THE third, has landed us a momentous interview with none other than Vincent Van Gogh! Also Gauguin's there.

HELLO SIR, WHAT IS YOUR NAME? Mine is Niles Hindenburg Barrier the third (like the name, eh?) and this week I'll be taking you aboard one of the most amazing pieces of technology ever constructed by man (and a personal favorite) - the Hindenburg! Join me now as we find out just how far I can push this whole ridiculous prospect of time travel on The Restory of History's Mysteries episode 2 - TEMPORAL CALAMITIES!

Niles Higginsbottom Barrier the third travels back to the turn of the 20th century in order to interview the creators of powered flight - the Wright Brothers. It's the Pilot Episode of The Restory of History's Mysteries!