Episodes
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16 Hypersonic Chicken Meteorites, Vivian Musk & the Green Dragon Sells White Claws
The boys kick around trade winds and why Hawaii feels cold in the seventies, then drift into Elon’s latest car stuff and family drama. Mike’s chicken launch demo gets ridiculous fast, the crew starts plotting a Kickstarter to take the Green Dragon Tavern back from the fancy drinks, and the thumbs...
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15 Peanut Butter Welds, Bear Guns & Firing Squads
The boys kick off with a peanut butter and jello weld holding a playground structure, Joe’s first-pass two stage elevator model built in Blender with Grok, and Mike’s 460 that can turn a charging bear. They argue Tesla interiors against the BMW X6, demo a wine profile app that remembers what you...
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Whisky+Cigars 2: Freedom, Guns & Whisky
Joe’s out in the open in Hilo lighting a cigar with a Bic while a Category 2 Hurricane spins offshore and the wind keeps killing the flame. Mike’s got the Nikka and the .45-70 lever gun in the background, Justin skipped cigar day again, and nobody’s slowing down. They dig into tipping culture and...
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14 Black Holes, Chicken Uterus and AI(SI) Escapes
Justin joins from a closet in his inlaw's apartment in Cusco after weeks of non-stop drinking and the boys immediately pile on with egg refrigeration theories and chicken anatomy deep dives. The conversation pivots hard into time relativity, black holes, atomic clocks and the mathematical claim...
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13 Honk Language, Mormon Underwear and a Pillar of Chickens
Justin is in Peru on wine and one prepod beer while Mike and Joe try to learn the local horn language, from a casual beep to a full die motherfucker die blast. The boys bounce from Mormon temple garments versus Mennonites, chirping smoke alarms, cyanide versus carbon monoxide, and a shock video...
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12 Pastor Manning, Ablution Stations & Die Motherfucker Die
Joe and Mike kick off with USB-C power quirks, why Macs just work while Windows stays buggy, and the never-ending Samsung TV lag that requires an hour of “warm-up.” Justin finally shows up and the conversation immediately goes sideways: DFW installing foot-washing stations, Pastor Manning’s...
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11 Zipper Merges, Mouth-to-Beak CPR & Grok Builds Counter-Strike
Mike and Joe open fire on the eternal war against bad drivers: zipper merges nobody understands, Hawaii’s retarded traffic circles, Saddle Road body count, and whether seatbelt laws are safety or just another money grab. Justin rolls in, casually builds a playable Counter-Strike clone in Grok…
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Whisky+Cigars 1: Okolehau, Spaceports & Subaru Roasts
Joe cracks the Okolehau (a clear Hawaiian cane-and-tea-root spirit from Ola Brew) and a big Perdomo while Michael sips Angels Envy and a Texas-size cigar. Justin shows up late from the doghouse with a Pisco Sour and no cigar. They dig into leaded avgas, jet streams, Hawaiian spaceports, the...
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10 Flock Cameras, Sovereign Citizens & The Physics of Soaking
Joe maps out the flock camera network logging plates and movements while people start running them over and shooting them. Then we dig into sovereign citizen pull-overs, the right to travel vs driving as a privilege, and whether America is secretly Morocco. Somehow that turns into a full physics...
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9 Exploding Flares, Hawaii Fuel Dreams, Nuclear Alerts & Getting Cancelled
Mike just racked up forty-five hundred miles in a week: Arizona, Wyoming, Washington, Seattle and back. The boys dig into fuel-delivery apps, microwave steaks, and whether people used to live nine hundred years before the flood wiped the tech. Iraq burn-barrel flare disasters, Travel John...
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8 Conor McGregor Threw a Fight? UFC Drama, Optimus Robots & Beer-Fueled Chaos
Mike, Justin, and Joe crack open some cold ones for a loose, beer-fueled hangout that bounces from UFC drama and World Cup conspiracies to political assassinations, retail tech of the future, and ridiculous personal stories. Expect unfiltered takes on everything from phone-locking pants disasters...
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7 Ghost Murmur Detectors & Iranian Jellyfish Drone Swarms
The boys shoot the shit in real time, jumping from Mike’s Washington vacation and horseback riding stories, to wild dreams after quitting weed, World Cup soccer drama, and deep dives into conspiracy theories like the “ghost murmur” quantum heartbeat detector and Iranian jellyfish/octopus drone...
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6 Beer, Bees & God: Home-brewing on a Volcano, Chinese Solar Backdoors & Can Math Prove God?
Justin and Joe crack open some beers and let the conversation wander. They start with brewing challenges on a volcanic island, homebrewing mead, wild yeast experiments, and beekeeping disasters (including ancient swarm-catching tricks). The talk shifts to soccer flops and VAR, daycare safety...
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5 'Murder Everyone' AI Solution? Wild Reddit Human Capital Debate + Elon Musk Trillionaire Future
In this episode the boys recap a wild Reddit take on human capital vs money capital in the AI era (and the “just murder everyone” solution), reveal that Peter McIndoe from Birds Aren’t Real is still alive, debate grass-fed Hawaiian beef vs mainland grain-fed, brainstorm better sex toy technology,...
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4 China’s Power, Civil War, Spoon-Bending Parties & Birds Aren’t Real on Steam: Classic Chaos
This week on Rivers Die Podcast, the boys discuss China’s power usage, Civil War history, spoon-bending parties from the 80s, Alaskan nose-pulling competitions, and the most ridiculous COVID rules they had to live through. They also find out there’s now a Birds Aren’t Real video game on Steam and...
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3 Rattlers vs. Radlers, Mukbang Horror, China’s Population Collapse & Bob Lazar
In this episode: Rattlers vs. Radlers, mukbang ASMR horror, China's looming population collapse, Bob Lazar skepticism, robot kids getting kicked, one-electron theory, undersea cables, and way too much Grok talk. Plus the boys test live AI voice tools mid-episode. Classic Rivers Die. S01 E03 - Jun...
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2 Starlink Advancements, UFO Mysteries, Celebrity Roasts & Free Speech
Join us as we explore the latest in technology, UFOs, and pop culture with engaging banter and insights. From Starlink's advancements to UFO mysteries and celebrity roasts, this episode offers a mix of tech talk, conspiracy theories, and entertainment. In this episode, the hosts discuss a wide...
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1 Elevator Industry Exposed: Big Contractors, Lazy Unions & AI-Powered Disruption
Brothers Joe and Michael, and cousin Justin kick off the Rivers Die Podcast with family UFO stories, Area 51 lore, and military flybys before diving deep into the dysfunctional elevator industry. They expose Big Four contractors, lazy union dynamics, proprietary equipment traps, and decade-long...
About this show
The Rivers Die Podcast is a raw, unfiltered, and hilariously chaotic hangout with Justin, Mike, and Joe. Three men, beers, thoughts and a microphone...
Hosted by
2-5-7 Productions
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