Things I Can't Say

Send us Fan MailAnnie shares an update about her struggles with her son's mental health and addiction issues. She reflects on the challenges of maintaining hope and the reality of ongoing difficulties, despite efforts to support him. Annie discusses the impact of these experiences on her family dynamics and her own mental health, expressing a need to set boundaries for her well-being. Support the show

Send us Fan MailAnnie addresses a frequently asked question about her son's current state and well-being, expressing the difficulty in providing a straightforward answer. Annie shares the history of her son's behavior, including past incidents of harm and ongoing issues with honesty and accountability. She reflects on the patterns of behavior that have persisted over the years, her son's interactions on social media, and the challenges of believing in change without seeing concrete evidence. Support the show

Send us Fan MailA personal reflection by Annie on the challenges of maintaining a marriage while raising a high-needs child. Annie shares her journey from meeting her husband in middle school to the present, highlighting the strain their third child's needs placed on their relationship. She candidly discusses feelings of resentment, isolation, and the struggle to balance personal desires with family responsibilities. Annie recounts a transformative solo trip to Disneyland, which helped her realize the importance of making choices based on personal desires rather than societal expectations. This epiphany led to a renewed appreciation for her husband and their marriage. Despite contemplating divorce, Annie emphasizes the importance of perseverance and self-care, acknowledging that while their marriage isn't perfect, it's worth the effort. She encourages others in similar situations to hold on, as there can be hope and fulfillment beyond the struggles.Support the show

Send us Fan MailAnnie shares her struggles with her son's addiction. She discusses a distressing night when she received a call from the emergency room, informing her that her son was intubated due to a severe incident likely related to his substance use. Annie reflects on the challenges of dealing with her son's addiction, the inadequacies of the treatment options available, and her feelings of helplessness and frustration. She expresses a mix of emotions, including anger at the system, sadness, and a sense of resignation about her son's choices and the lack of effective support. Despite the turmoil, Annie acknowledges the patterns of her son's behavior and the limitations of her ability to change the situation, emphasizing the need for a secure and comprehensive treatment program that addresses both addiction and mental health.Support the show

Send us Fan Mail Annie reflects on her initial decision to use her podcast as a space for unfiltered expression, contrasting it with her usual tendency to protect others' feelings. She discusses the emotional turmoil of discovering her son's unchanged behavior through social media, despite his current rehab stint. She grapples with the desire to protect him while acknowledging the need for boundaries to avoid being drawn back into his struggles. Annie emphasizes the importance of recognizing patterns in her son's behavior and the realization that she doesn't need to convince others of her perspective. She concludes with a resolve to accept the ongoing nature of her family's challenges and the necessity of maintaining her own experiences and emotions.Support the show

Send us Fan MailAnnie shares her emotional turmoil and frustration regarding her son's troubling behavior and relationships. She describes a recent incident that caused concern for both families involved. Annie reflects on her son's pattern of manipulating vulnerable individuals and the helplessness she feels as a parent unable to change his actions. Despite her efforts to warn others, she grapples with the ongoing cycle of distress and the impact on those around her. Support the show

Send us Fan MailIn this deeply personal and emotional episode, Annie shares her struggles and vulnerabilities as a parent dealing with her son's meth addiction. She reflects on the challenges of maintaining a filtered presence on social media while being more open in this space. Annie discusses her son's life, his manipulative behavior to maintain comfort, and the impact of his addiction on their family. She expresses her fears for her daughter's safety, the lack of accountability from authorities, and her own feelings of helplessness and despair. Support the show

Send us Fan MailIn this heartfelt clip, Annie opens up about the complexities of navigating family dynamics and emotions following a period of personal struggle. She reflects on the challenges of explaining the current state of her world, particularly the grief and trauma that don't have finality. Annie shares the difficulties of making decisions that impact her children, especially when those decisions are misunderstood or resented by them.  Despite the exhaustion and the feeling of being perceived negatively, Annie remains committed to doing what she believes is best for her family, even when it feels overwhelming.Support the show

Send us Fan MailThis episode features Annie discussing the deeply sensitive and challenging topic of sexual abuse within her family. She shares her personal experience of discovering the abuse between her children, emphasizing the complexity and hidden nature of such situations. Annie reflects on the signs she missed, the fear and confusion her daughter faced, and the difficult decisions she had to make to protect her daughter's healing and safety.Support the show

Send us Fan MailIn this heartfelt and candid clip, Annie shares her struggles and insights as a parent raising children who have experienced severe trauma. She discusses the challenges of balancing accountability and compassion, acknowledging the difficulty in holding children accountable when their brain function may not allow them to fully control their actions. Annie reflects on the societal expectations placed on her children, who appear "fine" externally but require significant support to manage their behavior.Support the show

Send us Fan MailAnnie shares her personal journey of navigating faith and mental illness, highlighting the challenges faced by families who don't fit the traditional mold of church communities. She reflects on her deep connection to the church, which was once her entire community, and the subsequent isolation she felt when her family's struggles with mental illness and trauma were not understood or supported. Annie candidly discusses the pain of losing friends and community support, the impact on her marriage, and her feelings of anger and disappointment towards people who failed to see her struggles.Support the show

Send us Fan MailAnnie shares her personal journey of navigating PTSD and advocating for her children's mental health needs. She reflects on the challenges faced with her son during middle school and the current struggles with her daughter, emphasizing the importance of distinguishing between advocating for necessary supports and excusing behaviors. Annie candidly discusses the emotional toll of revisiting past traumas and the fear of repeating difficult experiences. Support the show

Send us Fan MailAnnie discusses the potential causes of her son's behavior, including prenatal drug exposure, early childhood trauma, and the chaotic environment he experienced in foster care. She highlights the difficulties in finding effective psychiatric medications for her son, as many caused severe side effects. She also addresses the impact of marijuana on his mental health, noting its detrimental effects despite its perceived mildness. Support the show

Send us Fan MailThis episode features Annie, who shares her struggles as a parent dealing with a challenging situation involving her son. She describes the difficult transition from protecting her child to protecting others from him, highlighting the emotional turmoil and societal judgment she faces. Annie recounts specific incidents, including accusations against her son and her efforts to minimize harm to others, even when it meant making tough decisions that went against her values. Support the show

Send us Fan MailAnnie discusses the complexities of her relationship with her children's birth mother, highlighting the challenges and dynamics of co-parenting in an adoption context. She shares experiences of mediation, the emotional journey of fostering and adopting, and the evolving relationship with their birth mother.Support the show

Send us Fan MailAnnie shares her complex feelings about adoption and highlights the challenges and systemic failures she encountered. She discusses the lack of support from the adoption system, particularly in accessing necessary resources for children with special needs. Annie emphasizes the difficulties in navigating a system that often requires situations to reach a crisis point before help is available. Despite her love for fostering and open adoption, she criticizes the current system for not being designed for success.Support the show

Send us Fan MailDo I have regret? Wish I would have done things differently? Annie shares her deeply personal and challenging experiences as a parent navigating a tumultuous family life. She describes the overwhelming stress of managing multiple responsibilities, including her work and family, while dealing with her children's mental health issues. Annie recounts a particularly difficult night that highlighted the ongoing struggles within her family. Support the show

Send us Fan MailThe clip features a heartfelt and challenging narrative from Annie, who shares the journey of her son approaching adulthood amidst significant behavioral and mental health challenges. Annie discusses the complexities of her son's past actions, including inappropriate behavior and the impact on their family. She reflects on the struggle to find proactive solutions and the emotional toll of feeling powerless as her son becomes an adult.Support the show

Send us Fan MailAnnie shares the challenging journey of moving her son into a group home, hoping for a positive change. Initially, things seemed promising, but quickly deteriorated as her son's behavior worsened, leading to frequent runaways and substance abuse. Despite efforts to secure a safe environment, the situation remained dire. Annie grappled with hope and fear, uncertain about the future.Support the show

Send us Fan MailAnnie shares a deeply personal and challenging journey with her son, who faced significant mental health struggles during his high school years. The family dealt with the stress of managing psychiatric medications, unexpected behaviors, and episodes of psychosis. Despite efforts to find the right treatment, including hospital stays and day treatment programs, the situation escalated with substance use and behavioral issues. The family faced difficult decisions, including moving their son to a group home for better support. Throughout, Annie highlights the emotional toll on the family and the ongoing search for solutions.Support the show

Send us Fan MailAnnie shares a deeply personal and challenging experience about her son, who began exhibiting uncontrollable and destructive behavior shortly after moving into a new home. Her son experienced episodes of anger, causing significant damage to their home. The family, unable to find a diagnosis or effective help, faced daily struggles, involving paramedics and police to manage the situation. As her son started high school and entered a new relationship, the situation seemed to stabilize briefly, but the reintroduction of substances led to further decline, which Annie plans to discuss in a future episode.Support the show

Send us Fan MailThe podcast features Annie sharing a deeply personal story about her family's adoption journey and the challenges they faced. She recounts adopting her son from the foster care system and the complex behaviors that led to one crisis after another. Despite the difficulties, Annie emphasizes her commitment to transparency and authenticity, sharing her experiences to shed light on the realities of adoption and trauma. Support the show