Tooned In NUFC Podcast

Since Helen mentions it nearly every episode we are finally putting to bed one of the biggest transfer wounds in recent Newcastle United history 🖤🤍With the summer break well underway, Helen and Dave are finally locking themselves in the studio to dissect the saga that defined our entire 2025/26 campaign before it even kicked off. We are talking about *that* summer. The summer the financial rules bit hard, the PSR panic set in, and our world-class talisman Alexander Isak was sold to Liverpool.In this episode: Anatomy of a Mega-Sale: We revisit the chaotic final weeks of last summer’s transfer window. What actually happened behind closed doors? We trace the timeline from the first terrifying rumors to the absolute gut punch of seeing Alex holding up a red shirt at Anfield. The Ripple Effect: How did losing a 20 plus goal striker reshape Eddie Howe’s entire tactical blueprint this season? We look at how it thrust William Osula into the spotlight earlier than planned and altered the chemistry of our front three.Moving On vs. Moving Forward: Isak might have swapped Tyneside for Merseyside, but where did this leave us? We debate whether the astronomical fee was reinvested wisely and what the club must do this summer to ensure we never have to sell a superstar to a rival again. It’s part group therapy, part tactical autopsy, and 100% unfiltered.

The football might be on summer hiatus, but we are back in the studio for an absolute masterclass in the dark arts.With the 2025/26 season wrapped up, Helen and Dave are tackling one of the most beautiful, controversial, and fundamentally misunderstood concepts in the entire game: Shithousery. It’s a word we throw around every week on the mics, but today we are putting it under the microscope, tracking its history, and arguing over who wears the ultimate crown on Tyneside.In this episode: The Anatomy of a Shithouse: What does the term actually mean to us as fans? We separate lazy, malicious fouls from the psychological, tactical genius that leaves an opposition player completely rattled before a ball is even kicked. Our Personal Top 5 Countdown: The gloves come off as Helen and Dave count down their favorite Newcastle United shithouse moments of all time. Crowning the ultimate shithouse: our very own Cup Final Kid is back to discuss Helen and Dave's selections and crown the ultimate NUFC shithouse

The final whistle has blown and it is officially time to review one of the most chaotic and stressful seasons in recent memoryWe are locking ourselves in the studio for Episode 13 to hand out the official Tooned In end of season awards. From the European nights that shook the city to the brutal injury crisis that left us taped together in winter, we are looking back at how this season started, how it finished in 12th place, and what needs to happen next.In this episode:How It Started vs. How It Ended: We map out the expectation vs. reality. Coming off the back of a massive Carabao Cup run last year, we discuss how a 12th place finish looks on paper compared to the reality of surviving a historic squad meltdown and a brutal Champions League exit to Barcelona.The Official Tooned In Awards: We debate, argue, and crown our winners.The Summer Rebuild Blueprint: The fun part. We step into Eddie Howe's shoes and outline the exact tactical and personnel changes required to turn 12th place back into a top-four charge for the 2026/27 season. Who goes, who stays, and which position is the absolute 'first on the plane' priority?Thank you for riding the rollercoaster with us all season. Get Tooned In one last time for 2025/26!

The curtain has officially come down on the 2025/26 (thank goodness, Helen reckons).In this episode, we are recapping our final day trip to Craven Cottage to face Fulham. It’s the final 90 minutes of a rollercoaster year, but this week the real action happened off the pitch.The Final Day Review: We break down the tactical final stand of the season against Fulham. Did we finish on a high, or were we all just ready for the beach? The Neighborly Negativity: We unpack the bitter, petty, and downright poor sportsmanship we’ve experienced from our 'friends down the road' recently. Why are they so obsessed with our downfall when they should just be celebrating their rare success? Why Can't We All Just Be Nice?: We dive into a deep, philosophical (and highly emotional) debate on modern football fandom. Seriously, why is it so hard for some supporters to just be decent human beings? Is internet culture completely destroying the joy of the game? Helen's Jelly Moment: The biggest talking point of the weekend. Helen completely loses all motor skills and turns into a literal bowl of jelly when she finds herself face to face and having an actual conversation with the sexiest man in football; Fabian Schar.#NUFC #NewcastleUnited #ToonedIn #FulhamNewcastle #CravenCottage #PremierLeague #FootballFans #FinalDay

A winning send off at St. James' Park, but the co-host seat looks a little different this week!With regular co-host Dave away on holiday, Helen is flying solo... well, almost. Together, Helen and Dave 2.0 break down a brilliant, 3-1 victory over West Ham that has sent the Hammers packing to the brink of the Championship and kept our hunt for the neighbors in 11th alive down to the final day.In this episode:We dissect Nuno’s bizarre back-three tactical gift to us..Nick Woltemade shining in his proper No. 10 roleWilliam Osula bagging an absolute beauty of a brace those post-goal dance moves?! 🕺⚽ Is it ever okay to secretly want your own team to lose? We dive into the complex psychology of the final weeks of the season when shifting league positions change everything. The Kieran Trippier Legacy: An emotional 85th-minute standing ovation marked the final home appearance for the man who kickstarted the entire PIF era. The 'Barcode' Debate: The 2026/27 Adidas home kit leaks are everywhere, and the reviews are... mixed. We give our unfiltered thoughts on the massive central black stripe and that controversial blue trim.

We’re back to dissect a bittersweet Sunday afternoon at the City Ground. Newcastle looked set to make it two wins on the bounce thanks to another clinical Harvey Barnes strike, only for our own academy graduate Elliot Anderson to pop up with an 88th-minute equalizer.In this episode we also talk about: * The Anthony Gordon 'Saga': With reports of personal terms agreed with Bayern Munich we ask the big question: Has Anthony Gordon played his last game in Black and White? *Integrity & The Dark Side: We dive into a serious discussion on player integrity and the recent global headlines regarding match-fixing. How do we keep the beautiful game beautiful? * The Final SJP Send-off: Looking ahead to Sunday’s massive clash against West Ham. The Hammers are 18th and fighting for survival, can we send them closer to the drop while hunting down the neighbors for that 11th-place spot?There are only 180 minutes of football left this season. Let’s make them count.

​​After a dismal run of results, Newcastle United finally found their shooting boots at St. James' Park with a 3-1 victory over Brighton. Dave was actually in the stands for this one and he’s back to talk us through the atmosphere as William Osula, Dan Burn and Harvey Barnes secured the most important three points of the season so far. ​In this episode: ​Dave's SJP diary: From the pre match rituals to the feeling in the stands and what it felt like to finally see the lads win in person.Watching on Holiday: Helen talks about watching the Forrest game in Poland this weekend and the unique experience watching matches abroad with rival fans​Rage bait reality: We take aim at the social media 'influencers' who seemingly have nowt nice to say win or lose​Jacob Murphy Jacob Murphy-ing: How can we not mention Helen's main man deciding a training cone made for an excellent hat. Why did it happen? And more importantly, why did the internet lose its mind over it? The curse is over, the vibes are back. Get Tooned In. 🖤🤍

Five losses on the bounce is never easy, but this week had a very silver (and black and white) lining.In this episode, Dave and Helen dive into a disciplined but frustrating 1-0 defeat at the Emirates. We discuss whether a narrow loss to the league leaders counts as 'progress' and why we’re still struggling to find the back of the net when it matters mostIn this episode: The Arsenal Autopsy - Did we actually look like a functional football team again? We praise the defensive shifts of Botman and Thiaw and wonder what might have been if Wissa had tucked that late chance away. The Woltemade Drama - We address the social media storm surrounding Nick Woltemade’s Instagram bio. Was removing the club tags a sign of a summer exit, or just a 24 year old having a digital spring clean? Sunderland Schadenfreude - The Mackems being hammered 5-0 at home by Nottingham Forest. We revel in the chaos of a four goal first half and the sight of Mackems heading for the exits before the halftime pie had even cooled down. One of Our Own - A truly emotional look at Elliot Anderson’s week. From the heartbreak of losing his mum to scoring the fifth goal at the Stadium of Light we discuss that moving tribute and why every Geordie was cheering for him on Friday night. 🖤🤍 Brighton Preview - Looking ahead to the visit of the high flying Seagulls. With Joelinton back from suspension, is this finally the game where the 'Podcast Curse' is broken?HWTL! 🖤🤍

Is it the 'Tooned In' curse, or are we just allergic to a clean sheet at the moment?​Dave and Helen are back to pick through the wreckage of a demoralizing Saturday afternoon at St. James' Park. Despite Will Osula keeping his scoring streak alive, a late collapse saw Bournemouth leave with all three points, leaving the Gallowgate searching for answers.​In this episode:​Dissecting the Defeat: Why are we struggling to hold onto leads? We talk about the 85th-minute heartbreak and why the 'Fortress SJP' vibe has gone cold in 2026.​The 'Curse' is Real: We address the elephant in the room; the fact that Newcastle haven't won a single game since we started this podcast. Are we the hex? ​Injury Setbacks: We react to the mystery surrounding Anthony Gordon’s hip.​Emirates Anxiety: Looking ahead to the daunting trip to North London this Saturday. Can we really stop a flying Arsenal side without our first choice backline?​The Summer Rumour Mill: From Anthony Gordon being linked with Liverpool to the whispers of a massive sell-to-buy summer, we reaccess who stays and who goes.​Whether you're a Howe inner or Howe outer, join us for some much-needed black-and-white therapy.​HWTL! 🖤🤍

Dave and Helen are back to dissect a frustrating Sunday afternoon in South London after the 2-1 defeat to Crystal Palace. We’re talking about where it went wrong, whether the 'International Break Rust' is a real thing or just a convenient excuse and all the rest of the shirt pulling drama!But there’s no time to dwell because the Cherries are coming to St. James’ Park this Saturday so we also look ahead to the Bournemouth clash, who we notoriously never beat. Spoiler alert, it's a moany one!

With the international break over and 7 games left to play, Dave and Helen get their crystal balls out and discuss how they think the rest of the season will pan out.- Is Eddie Howe's job really in jeopardy?- Can we dare to dream of European football next season?- Who do we think the summer movers and shakers will be?- What does Dave think about Chelsea?- How many times can Helen mention Jacob Murphy? As usual, opinions are divided in the Tooned In studio (except perhaps over our love for a certain Brazilian captain). Do you agree with our predictions? Let us know in the comments!

Forget the xG, the clean sheets, and the transfer values. Dave and Helen are throwing the rulebook out of the window.We aren't picking the statistically 'best' Newcastle United eleven of all time. We’re picking *our* eleven. The players who made us fall in love with the club, the ones who had the best goal celebrations, and the cult heroes who might not have won a Balon d'Or but definitely won a place in our hearts Join us as we argue, reminisce, and inevitably leave out someone’s favorite player.

In this episode, Dave and Helen take a trip down a very crowded memory lane to mark the first anniversary of the Newcastle United Carabao Cup Bus Parade.It wasn't just about a trophy, it was about a city finally finding something to shout about again. We’re looking back at: * The Atmosphere: That incredible sea of black and white stretching from St James Park to the Town Moor. * The Players: Seeing the lads soak in the Geordie love * Who we saw on our side of the bus and whether Helen was happy with that or notWhether you were hanging off a lamppost for a better view or waiting on the Moor so a glimpse of the boys, this one is for the fans who proved that Newcastle United is well and truly back.

Brace yourselves, Mags! In this episode, Dave and Helen dive head first into the beautiful, chaotic, and (more recently) heartbreaking world of the Tyne-Wear Derby. After a weekend that left the Gallowgate reeling, we’re stripping back the stats to talk about what this fixture really feels like.What’s inside:* The Post-Match Therapy Session: We break down that 90th-minute heartbreaker and the 'Daylight Brobbery' at St. James'.* The Mackem Slayer: A tribute to Shola Ameobi and why he owned the red and white defense.* Horse Punching & Tactical Suicides: We revisit the infamous Barry Rogerson incident and the rain-soaked night Ruud Gullit benched Shearer and Big Dunc.* Global Grudges: How does our rivalry stack up against the Old Firm, the Merseyside Derby, and if Helen were from Manchester, would she be red or blue?It’s raw, it’s passionate, and, given the result, there’s a fair bit of industrial language in this one. You’ve been warned!

One year on from that unforgettable day at Wembley, Dave and Helen relive the magic of the Carabao Cup victory that ended the 70-year wait. From the pre-match nerves to the absolute scenes at the final whistle, they share their personal stories of where they were, how they felt during those 90 minutes, and what it’s meant for the city ever since. It’s an episode packed with pure Geordie emotion and celebratory vibes, so grab a drink, reminisce with us, and Stay Tooned In!

Meet Dave and Helen, the father/daughter duo behind Tooned In. This isn't your typical stats heavy football show; it’s a Newcastle United podcast built on feelings, family, and the sheer joy of being a Magpie. From Dave’s Heaton roots to Helen’s 90s nostalgia, join us for a fun, positive look at all things NUFC. Hit follow and stay tooned in!