Tuna Sandwich
by Rachel Barrett
Listen to it with your cats, or leave it on for your plants, and whilst you're at it, rub some viagra on your plants too. finalist COMEDY: Australian Podcast Awards (2024). runner-up COMEDY GOLD: International Women's Podcast Awards. (2024) Cheerful Earful Podcast Festival (2024): THE TUNA SANDWICH EXPERIENCE. Hosted by Rach @elfymama
Episodes
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TUNA SANDWICH DAY
It's TUNA SANDWICH DAY..... which means it's time for the truth, the whole truth, and nothing but the truth. slide into the DM's and let me know what films are unauthorised documentaries about your life? @elfymama LISTEN TO CREATURE OF THE NIGHT PS. watch Tom Green's world first MULECAST PPS....
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PLEASE LEAVE A MESSAGE
Hello, you’ve reached Tuna Sandwich, I’m not here to take your call, please leave a message after the beep… Slide into my DMs and tell me if you know what song is stuck in my head.. @Elfymama Like this show?? tell a friend! or leave me a review, and in thanks I will make sure the airport library…
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UNA ANDWICH'S DVD REVIEWS: pretty woman
Una Andwich is here to tell you about this DVD, then she is deciding who from the DVD she is going to f*ck, marry, or kill... then... she will make her judgement and write her DVD Review..... THIS IS PRETTY WOMAN DVD REVIEW. Slide into my DMs and tell me what DVD's you would like Una to review......
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THE WEREWOLF... returns..
Gary The Werewolf is back to tell us more about his life as a contemporary werewolf living in a modern world... Slide into my DMs and tell me what documentaries you have been watching.. @Elfymama Like this show?? tell a friend! or leave me a review, and in thanks I will take you to the park..…
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SEXCULT: on holiday
Listen up worms... we are going on a trip! pack your cursed talismans, check your planetary alignments, and don't forget your SPF lube.. Slide into my DMs and tell me if you enjoy sex on the beach.. @Elfymama Like this show?? tell a friend! or leave me a review, and in thanks I will send you a...
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PLUTO: heart shaped glacier
Pluto reminds us that the universe owes us nothing, no comfort, no meaning, and yet it still sends us postcards from the outer rims of Uranus. Slide into my DMs and tell me if you are trying to make sense of the chaos.. @Elfymama Like this show?? tell a friend! or leave me a review, and in thanks…
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UNA ANDWICH'S DVD REVIEWS: jaws
Una Andwich is here to tell you about this DVD, then she is deciding who from the DVD she is going to f*ck, marry, or kill... then... she will make her judgement and write her DVD Review..... THIS IS JAWS DVD REVIEW. Slide into my DMs and tell me what DVD's you would like Una to review...…
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LIVE FROM THE LOUNGE: submissionary
YOU HAVE NO NAME NO PLACE TO RUN WHAT BEGINS NOW CAN NEVER BE UNDONE Slide into my DMs and tell me if you will silence the lie.. @Elfymama Like this show?? tell a friend! or leave me a review, and in thanks I will open up your eyes... Written & Produced by Rachel Barrett
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LOBSTER ROLL destiny
IT'S YOUR FAVOURITE SHOW! IT'S LOBSTER ROLL! It's time to embrace your destiny, and get that hot piece to be your Mr (or Mrs) Lobster Roll.. This episode is supported by Shower Pals so you can get clean after a dirty night out.. Slide into my DMs and tell me if you have a special someone with an...
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THE BREATH OF GOD
carving possibility from ruin... every heartbeat, every fleeting thought owes its existence to a world that began in fire... Slide into my DMs and tell me if you have almost choked to death on a mandarin.. @Elfymama Like this show?? tell a friend! or leave me a review, and in thanks I will come...
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LAW & ORDER: missing t-shirt
POLICE REPORT Incident Type: Theft Summary: my favourite shirt is missing!!! Slide into my DMs and tell me if you have been involved in a crime.. @Elfymama Like this show?? tell a friend! or leave me a review, and in thanks I will send you jeans that disintegrate off your body... yay! Written &...
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SEXCULT: upcoming events
Listen up worms.... we have some important upcoming events to start the New Cult Year.... make sure you wear your new chains to the bonfire... see you at The Punishing this evening.. Slide into my DMs and tell me who you are bringing to the feast of Other & Potential You's.. @Elfymama Like this...
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UNA ANDWICH'S DVD REVIEWS: poltergeist
Una Andwich is here to tell you about this DVD, then she is deciding who from the DVD she is going to f*ck, marry, or kill... then... she will make her judgement and write her DVD Review..... THIS IS POLTERGEIST DVD REVIEW. Slide into my DMs and tell me what DVD's you would like Una to review......
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OXYGEN we are over
Oxygen is like that boyfriend who's super clingy but tries to play it cool. It’s always hovering around, waiting for a chance to bind to your hemoglobin... but we're done here. It's OVER oxygen. Slide into my DMs and tell me if you are in a codependent relationship you can't get out of..…
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THE GREATEST LOVE STORY EVER TOLD
We need to talk about Rachel....... Slide into my DMs and tell me if you have a sexy cousin you'd like to bang.. @Elfymama Like this show?? tell a friend! or leave me a review, and in thanks I will come to your wedding and make sure you are marrying the right woman.. yay! Written & Produced by...
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UNA ANDWICH'S DVD REVIEWS: the mummy
Una Andwich is here to tell you about this DVD, then she is deciding who from the DVD she is going to f*ck, marry, or kill... then... she will make her judgement and write her DVD Review..... THIS IS THE MUMMY DVD REVIEW. Slide into my DMs and tell me what DVD's you would like Una to review......
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NOT ALL RAVENS
Terry Raven joins us LIVE FROM THE BRANCH, to give us a contemporary view of what it's like being a Raven in a world that doesn't even know your name... Slide into my DMs and tell me if you have been involved in a craven mating ritual in a dark carpark at the end of the night .. @Elfymama Like…
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LIVE FROM THE LOUNGE: arsenic poisoning
Question: how many lunchboxes full of tabouli salad is too much?? and what does this have to do with the self defence mechanisms that plants have evolved to poison and destroy us with? Slide into my DMs and tell me what surprise you had in a doctors office.... @Elfymama Like this show?? tell a...
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WITHIN THE PINES
Pine trees are among the oldest living plants on earth, they were here before the Dinosaurs, they can survive ice ages, and the shifting of continents.. but can the pine tree survive being a guest on Tuna Sandwich?? Slide into my DMs and tell me if you have a symbiotic relationship with...
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ONLY TUNA SANDWICH
PORN!! what is it good for?? well, lots of things actually....Porn revolutionised the world.. but it hasn't revolutionised the humble podcast.. until now.. welcome to ....Only Tuna Sandwich... where the clothes are on the floor, the shower is steamy, and moisturiser demands to be rubbed into all...
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UNA ANDWICH'S DVD REVIEWS: overboard
Una Andwich is here to tell you about this DVD, then she is deciding who from the DVD she is going to f*ck, marry, or kill... then... she will make her judgement and write her DVD Review..... THIS IS OVERBOARD DVD REVIEW. Slide into my DMs and tell me what DVD's you would like Una to review......
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IMPORTANT ANNOUNCEMENT: the truth.. for real
**IMPORTANT ANNOUNCEMENT** It is time to stop hiding in the shadows of doubt and to take a bold leap into the unknown and finally say my truth into this world... it's not easy..because once I say this, things will never be the same... not for me.. and especially not for you (yes, you) Thanks to...
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SEXCULT: the reeducation seminar
Listen up worms... a lot of you haven't been paying attention to the rules of the cult! At this week's seminar we will be going over some basic laws and protocols, as well as handing out the monthly chores, I want all ritual goo cleaned up in a timely manner.... Slide into my DMs and tell me if...
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Dr HOOT PhD
We are here today to talk to death’s harbinger, the omen of death.. Dr Hoot Phd is our very special guest.. Owls don’t just kill. They erase. They don’t just see you. They absorb you. They are the witnesses to a world that never stops dying. And long after we are gone, when the final lights have...
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LAW & ORDER: the crimes of santa
POLICE REPORT Incident Type: Criminal Trespassing / Unlawful Entry Summary: at approximately 12.01am on December 25, 2024, multiple reports were received regarding an unknown male suspect unlawfully entering residential properties through chimneys and other unconventional points of entry. The...
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mosquitos SUCK
did you hear that???.... that annoying noise!!??!?!?! They’ve been here for over 100 million years. They survived the dinosaurs. They’ve outlived empires, plagues, And yet, despite their tiny size… they are the deadliest creatures on Earth... I am here today talking to the biggest dickhead of the...
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UNA ANDWICH'S DVD REVIEWS: the exorcist
Una Andwich is here to tell you about this DVD, then she is deciding who from the DVD she is going to f*ck, marry, or kill... then... she will make her judgement and write her DVD Review..... THIS IS THE EXORCIST DVD REVIEW. Slide into my DMs and tell me what DVD's you would like Una to review......
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LIVE FROM THE LOUNGE: a dramatic reading Olivia Newton John's 'PHYSICAL'
Picture this.... your teachers have allowed you do a one-person dance performance of you favourite song at the school assembly...and you have chosen Olivia Newton John's 'Physical', despite having no awareness of the sexual undertones of this song...let's take a deeper dive into the lyrical...
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THE WEREWOLF
Today we are taking a journey into the shadows, where the line between man and monster blurs in the pale light of the moon, and we unravel the curse of the werewolf! A creature neither fully human nor fully beast. When the moon rises, and the hunger takes hold, is the monster inside the man?? Or...
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THE UNIVERSAL ANSWERING MACHINE
Do you have a problem? A dilemma? A confession? A digression? LEAVE A MESSAGE AFTER THE BEEP AND MAYBE YOUR VOICE WILL ECHO THROUGH THE EXISTENTIAL DARKNESS OF THE VOID.... Slide into my DMs and tell me if you find strength in trauma.. @Elfymama Like this show?? tell a friend! or leave me a…
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SEXCULT: the suggestion box
Listen up worms... if you're new to the cult meeting, we will be going through some ground rules.. but most importantly, this week we are going through the suggestion box.. better snacks at the orgies? no socks during the ritual, and most importantly.. no tambourines.. see you all at The…
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MESSAGE INCOMING FROM TUNA SANDWICH
Hello, you've reached Tuna Sandwich.. we are unable to take your call. Tuna Sandwich is currently working on something huge, something amazing, something that is going to blow your minds. Tuna Sandwich will be back on the 1st of June. Slide into my DMs and tell me if you are also working on...
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UNA ANDWICH'S DVD REVIEWS: Jurassic Park
Una Andwich is here to tell you about this DVD, then she is deciding who from the DVD she is going to f*ck, marry, or kill... then... she will make her judgement and write her DVD Review..... THIS IS JURASSIC PARK DVD REVIEW. Slide into my DMs and tell me what DVD's you would like Una to…
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PHAT
I had the craziest dream.... This episode is brought to you by NIGHT CEREALS FOR TWO, now you can eat cereal in bed together with that special someone... Slide into my DMs and tell me if you are not afraid to drown... @Elfymama Like this show?? tell a friend! or leave me a review, and in thanks I...
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THE CAT'S MEOW
This is the Cat's Meow.... ALL Cats FOR Cats.. translated for humans by Cats... Do you dream of freedom, a life of your own? Slide into my DMs and tell me if you are the puppet tied to my string.. @Elfymama Like this show?? tell a friend! or leave me a review, and in thanks I will send you a...
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SOMETHING The Musical
All I’m asking is for is 4 million dollars 4 million dollars would be really nice 4 million dollars would solve all my problems 4 million dollars would change my life Slide into my DMs and tell me if you want 4 million dollars.. @Elfymama Like this show?? tell a friend! or leave me a review, and…
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LAW AND ORDER
"Ma'am... I'm going to need you to calm down and tell us exactly what happened .. start at the beginning..." Slide into my DMs and tell me if you have been involved in a crime.. @Elfymama Like this show?? tell a friend! or leave me a review, and in thanks I will send you some Day 3 Xmas…
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BEHIND THE PODCAST
Do you want to Opt Out of this modern life and move into a hole in the ground?? On Behind the Podcast this week we are talking about New Year's Resolutions.. "New Year, New You" more like New Year, same garbage person you've always been... This episode is brought to you by Manifestos and Sleeping...
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THE NATIVITY
Joey Joe Joe and Mary are having marriage difficulties, but that's nothing a f*cked journey by Donkey and having no reservations at the Inn can't fix... special guest appearance by Hot Piece Gabrielle... *purrrrr* Slide into my DMs and tell me if you have ever tried to hide a pregnancy from your...
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LOBSTER ROLL has demons
IT'S YOUR FAVOURITE SHOW! IT'S LOBSTER ROLL! You ever hear a bump in the night and wonder if its a demon that watching you?? or is it just Mr Lobster roll and his impressive side dong bumping into furniture in the night??? This episode is supported by Sparkle Glitter so you never lose your Hot...
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LOBSTER ROLL at the beach
IT'S TIME FOR YOUR FAVOURITE SHOW! IT'S LOBSTER ROLL! This week we going to the beach to get Wet, Wild, and Wonderful.... shoutout to Mr Lobster Roll for wearing his banana-hammock and having his impressive side dong on display. This episode is supported by Moon Cream so you don't get burnt by…
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LOBSTER ROLL
IT'S LOBSTER ROLL! YEAH IT'S TIME FOR YOUR FAVOURITE SHOW!! Is your ivory tower not dank? shoutout to Mr Lobster Roll and his impressive side dong that is always on display, being all capable and building shelves. This episode NOT supported by Anti-Ant Ice Cream Bibs, because we don't need them,...
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BEDTIME
it's 4am, what thoughts are running through your mind as you try to get to sleep?? Slide into my DMs and tell me what you think of before you go to sleep @Elfymama Like this show?? tell a friend! or leave me a review, and in thanks I will tuck you in and tell you a bedtime story. Written &…
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TUNA SANDWICH UNPLUGGED
Just me and the darkness, tangled in mind. Slide into my DMs and tell me if you are also caught in the silence @Elfymama Like this show?? tell a friend! or leave me a review, and in thanks I will whisper the echoes that fade into your memory. Written & Produced by Rachel Barrett
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THE HERETICS
In the deepest corners of human history the veil between the known and the unknown wears thin, and within this darkness a tale of the witch emerges. A fable woven with fear, suspicion, and lies…. Written & Produced by Rachel Barrett Music by https://www.purple-planet.com/ Slide into my DMs and…
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TRANSMISSION: The Creeps 90s film retrospective
I've tapped into a transmission signal to bring you this episode of The Creeps, as they traverse some incredibly niche musical genres inspired by films of the 90s. I guess if you want to hear more Creeps you have to listen to The Flippity Flop Slide into my DMs and tell me what song was your...
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AN INCONVENIENT TRUTH
There are inconvenient truths in this life, and I am here to set the record straight once and for all... so the question is .... are you ready to hear what i'm about to say??? This episode is supported by: Suge Knight Cereals: where each box of cereals comes with a fake gun for scaring loud birds...
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MISTAKES WERE MADE
mistakes were made....and now i'm drifting towards a black hole of certain death.. but aren't we all drifting towards a black hole of certain death from the minute we are born?? Written & Produced by Rachel Barrett Music by https://www.purple-planet.com/ Slide into my DMs and tell me what…
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DECOMPOSING ALONE IN MY FLAT
Living alone can be really great, you can do whatever you want. But what if today there was a surprise in store, what if you died? and now your corpse is on the floor. Written & Produced by Rachel Barrett Music by https://www.purple-planet.com/ Slide into my DMs and tell me if if you need me to...
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SMART TOILETS
Smart Toilets... can they be trusted?? what if you came home and there was texts from the smart toilet on your boyfriend's phone? Written & Produced by Rachel Barrett Music by https://www.purple-planet.com/ Slide into my DMs and tell me if you have a smart toilet and if that toilet has ever…
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About this show
Listen to it with your cats, or leave it on for your plants, and whilst you're at it, rub some viagra on your plants too.
finalist COMEDY: Australian Podcast Awards (2024).
runner-up COMEDY GOLD: International Women's Podcast Awards. (2024)
Cheerful Earful Podcast Festival (2024): THE TUNA SANDWICH EXPERIENCE.
Hosted by Rach @elfymama
Hosted by
Rachel Barrett