Tweet Me Harder

Kris and David decide that normal books are boring and insufficient, and instead set out to BETTER the world with the invention of strange and marvelous BOOK DISGUISES.

Kris and David endorse cereals, hack the Twitter character set, explore euphemisms on television shows, speak the language of adulthood, and plumb the meanings of names.

In the series finale of Tweet Me Harder, Kris and David revitalize the -trix suffix for all professions, explain their own fathers' podcast catastrophes, explain what keeps corpses from floating off into the atmosphere, and finally close the causality loop.

In this collection of deleted bits from prior Tweet Me Harder episodes, Kris and David make the perfect sound effect, defend their parking preferences, comment on the President, and flee from the law.

Kris and David raise children in a webcam-equipped dungeon, make every snapshot a prize-winning piece of journalism, abandon soap for good, learn what makes the best rodeo clowns so good, and grow dinosaurs in their sinuses.

Kris and David discover why marbles went out of fashion, realize exactly what the snack-food industry has long been hoping that someone would, use stock-car racing to make important scientific discoveries, and tell the waiter to hold the magnets, please!

Kris and David try for the full sensory cycle with this rousing discussion of smell-tuba concerts, advances in home illumination, the best way to sneak out of jail, incredibly intuitive explanations for global warming, and how to get to know your neighbors. Plus, David describes his past as an art forger.

Kris and David reveal the elaborate plots of the undead, spend time alone in their room with carpet samples, write a bestselling book to blow the minds of tweens, and endure relationship problems stemming from being a fish-man and a werewolf respectively.

Kris and David compare products to their marketing, make everything out of potatoes, and in Ask Me Harder, determine the best joint for macaroni, probe the sleep of the genders, and isolate the Dorito spice.

Kris and David crack the code of hobby horse classification, bodily organs of a different kind, designer bacon, Deaf Coca-Cola, and bring it all home with hot dogs.

Kris and David broadcast LIVE from the 2010 New England Webcomics Weekend after passing the audio signal through the voice box of an abandoned Russian submarine and letting a squirrel sit on it for a while.

Kris and David create a sham conservatory for diseased wild animals, examine the quantum state of stuntmen, find the best seats in the movie theater, decry foreign languages, peer into buildings, and compare notes with Kevin McShane regarding the events of the last few weeks.

Kris, trapped in a nightmarish foreign problem-hospital, grows increasingly frantic as David thwarts dangers of his own en route to his rescue. Also, a solution for safely fireproofing homes, Kevin McShane steals a helicopter, and we finally learn the Greentown-kroner-to-hotdog exchange rate.

David turns to European drilling-platform sovereign John Allison for clues to Kris's whereabouts. The two debate the fashion choices of dictators, the sometime necessity of proxy hugging, the importance of choosing one's stamp-mate, and how many watts of music power TMH can muster.

David and guest host Chris Hastings unpack the parochial history of roller-coasters, the pressure not placed on pets to be ethical, prospects for the Smithsonian Sneezing-Animal Emporium, and come to a conclusion regarding the safety of European hospitals.

Guest host Colleen AF Venable joins David to describe the afterlife of mac-n-cheese, how to deal with sweet or savory individuals in a post-racial society, and what to feed an electric water snake. Meanwhile, Kris lives it up in fancy-pants Europe.

David and guest-host Dave Kellett explain the weather inside a blimp hangar, the hidden hazards of working with Post-It glue, the joy of being a hobbyist actuary, how the Slavs do the Amber Alert, and where the heck Kris got off to.

When Kris is late showing up for the show, Kevin McShane steps in to help David out. The upbeat pair wackily discuss doorknobs, gas ovens, and the Internet!

Kris and David flee hazardous weather, consider sustainable ways to melt frozen blood, become modern equivalents to swordsmen, use drill-bits as their sigil, and John Allison's TMH fanfic reaches its nail-biting conclusion.

Kris and David consider commissioning a TMH mascot, marvel at the Dry-Erase Guild Society's inventive goings-on, hear listener tales of Forgettable Adventures, and John Allison's TMH fanfic reaches a fever pitch.

Kris and David spar off on big-city values, consider a world in which glass was never invented, get Facebook to predict their moods, and John Allison's TMH fan-fiction epic takes a dark turn.

Kris and David get rid of product packaging, throw a salad-dressing party, run in terror from the wild zamboni, tell tales of problems with sports, and famous fan-fiction author John Allison continues his TMH epic.

Kris and David stare down the promise of immortality, defer their physical pain, hear tales of machinery gone awry, and world-famous fanfic author John Allison has a rare treat for the fellas.

Kris and David expand their tube-delivery business, get vaccinated against health, give an infant the 55-year-old arms of a murderer, and David quests after a free haircut.

Kris and David investigate the fluid content of books, probe the mysteries of a sinister housing development, commit crimes to promote movies, sell illicit beverages from their treehouse and make an enemy of R.L. Stine.

Kris and David solve the problem of chronic lateness, make major breakthroughs in self-administered internal medicine, uncover the bird conspiracy to murder old ladies, and finally win The Game.

Kris and David unearth the history of modern card games, analyze David's obsession with frugality, and discover the truth behind the male-pattern butt-chin.

Kris and David hijack celebrity Twitter feeds, ponder the saga of Weird Old Doctor vs. Young Kurt Straub, dig into listeners' irrational fears, and reunite the United States.

Kris and David report live from the TMH book release party in Portland, Oregon, going the extra mile to insulate your attic from ghosts, incinerate your childhood keepsakes, sell you a bat on a pizza and eat spoiled foreign food for your amusement.

QuickTime video of TMH LIVE Portland! Kris and David insulate your attic from ghosts, incinerate your childhood keepsakes, sell you a bat on a pizza and eat spoiled foreign food for your amusement.

Kris and David solve more listener problems, dig into a world of erroneous assumptions made, revitalize the sack-lunch industry and learn something about beeswax.

Kris and David unpack everything there is to know about the Hamburglar, start a murder franchise, learn about crowbars, explain at furious length how the TMH book will benefit your life, and David attempts revenge on Kris for inflicting Mom Me Harder on the show.

Kris and David's mom explore a world of magical thinking, driving woes, and discover the true meaning of being stung by insects whose only goal is to steal your summer meats. Plus, how do you take your hot dog? The wrong way, probably.

Kris and David make inroads in battery safety, identify the most rueful metals, join the Zeppelin Advisory Board, fill balloons with the elements, and may in fact be dreaming. Also, David starts to resent Mom Me Harder.

David's mom remembers a heady young David, while Kris seeks a higher education; also, the shocking secret behind Master Chief.

Kris and David probe the world's finest minds on the MIT campus in Cambridge, MA, imparting wisdom from the year 4000. The time-traveling duo examines bee armor, clones musicians, requests injections, and explains how fat is money.

QuickTime Video of TMH LIVE in Boston! Kris and David probe the world's finest minds on the MIT campus in Cambridge, MA, imparting wisdom from the year 4000. The time-traveling duo examines bee armor, clones musicians, requests injections, and explains how fat is money.

Meet Kris and David at TMH Live at ROFLCon on Saturday, May 1, or attend the TMH Meetup at the Asgard on April 30! Also introducing: HEY WORLD HERE ARE SOME SUGGESTIONS, the very first TMH book!!

Kris and David eat mice and other rodents whole, consider pet ownership, wonder about tapeworms, and prevent cataclysm by conjuring lost dinosaur energies while David's mom thinks her son dislikes her cooking.

Kris and David address an audience of themselves at TMH Live Chicago, broadcasting from the lovely Sheraton Hotel. The lads roll with punches, hold a trivia contest, and in Ask Me Harder, explain all about Chicago politics, electricity, and the old-time pillow-gifting custom.

QuickTime video of TMH43 in Chicago, shot LIVE at the Sheraton Hotel.

Kris and David solve listeners' troubling medical mysteries, revitalize the American penny, figure out why Kris' calcified wrists are secretly killing him, and discover an instant 'in' with Jehoovah. A classic Tweet Me Harder!

Kris and David explore a world of disposable reading material, ships of insects, and how to stay on top of your to-do list with memory-enhancing techniques. David also reveals a dark physical secret no one has ever heard of before.

Kris and David address the multitudes at TMH LIVE Seattle, explaining the secrets of cobblers, testing the knowledge of audience members, appraising valuable antiques, and revealing the Church of Tweet Me Harder.

Stunning video footage from the TMH40 performance in Seattle, WA shot LIVE in front of a capacity crowd!

Kris and David go on an undersea adventure, search for the cure to a shattering illness, throw themselves headlong into stones, and David's mom appreciates literature.

Kris and David are coming to Seattle, Washington on March 12! See tweetmeharder.com for full details.

Kris and David bear terrified witness to Bed, Bath and Beyond knockoffs, stratified mind-altering gases, smoothies, ozonated child labor and the world's tallest man as David undertakes his own exploration.

Kris and David survey the entire planet, throw surprise parties, make enemies of archers, tell long-winded stories of fruitless correspondence, and David's mom thinks the boys are doing a good job.

Kris and David uncover the terrifying hidden meaning behind Thomas Kincade paintings, Kris says goodbye to his window-cataloguing project, and David's mom continues to have opinions about Tweet Me Harder.