PODCAST · comedy
Two Absolute Bookends
by Two Absolute Bookends
Join Right bookend Peter and Left Bookend Louis as they critique bad literature chapter by chapter, often getting very distracted and off topic along the way.
Episodes
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Episode 42 – Fastening a Noose Now the Chuckles Are Tallied
Download the Podcast Here The Season Finale of Two Absolute Bookends – Chapter 30 of the way the Stars Fall: Rebirth. Back on the tranquillity, Sans Hollister and with a Popsicle alien Tona, Jack has a mental breakdown, fails to go through a wormhole, cries, destroys the Rokarii Fleet then passes...
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Episode 41 - The Dab Heard Across The Universe
Download the Podcast Here In the penultimate chapter 29 we have a fiery conclusion to the action we’ve been building to for chapters. Tiberius busts into the room where Jack is getting his insides made outsides by Tona, a three way fight ensues, and after Tona suddenly remember who she is, she…
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Episode 40 - Sad One Tonight Boys
Download the Podcast Here As the book nears its end, we find ourselves back aboard the Turmoil to find out what our old buddy Tiberius has been up to. It can actually be summarised very quickly. He takes the Ilmarian fleets, which now all have warp drives somehow, and jumps right into the middle…
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Episode 39 - All Roads Lead to Qualm Pie
Download the Podcast Here It’s all action aboard the tranquillity for Chapter 27 of The Way The Stars Fall: Rebirth. As they approach the wormhole, the Rokarii fleet from a few chapters ago flies out to meet them. Don’t think about the logistics of that, because they make no sense. We then have a...
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Episode 38 – Unnecessary Maths
Download the Podcast Here The last chapter blew chunks, and chapter 26 isn’t any better. A short chapter that is still far too long considering literally nothing of interest happens. We’re back on the tranquillity with jack and Hollister, and we get to enjoy Logistics the Musical as they talk…
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Episode 37 – Farmer Tona and the Jack Hunter Harvest
Download the Podcast Here Welp, that didn’t last long. After being comparatively positive about chapter 24, chapter 25 turned out to be an abortion even by the usual standards of this book. We spend the whole chapter with the Rokarii, where Tona and Queen Vilxena discuss their retarded plans to...
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Episode 36 - Uncharacteristic Competence
Download the Podcast Here This time on Two Absolute Bookends we get a chapter of literally nothing, albeit nothing written better that any of the action we’ve had recently. Tiberius returns back to the Imperator for a chat after everything went wrong in his attempt to capture the Tranquillity and...
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Episode 35 - Remembering Talia
Download the Podcast Here This time on Two Absolute Bookends we get some action as Tiberius and his fleet finally interact with jack and the Rokarii in the past... Just roll with it. Needless to say, as this is TWTSF, everyone is retarded. The tranquillity is in a bad way from the pursuing…
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Episode 34 - Beetle Craft, Beetle Craft, Beetle Craft
Download the Podcast Here Back again with a little less down time to welcome in the New Year, your bookends this week join Captain Tiberius of the turmoil, where after like 10 chapters we finally have Tiberius’s story intersect with Jack and the Tranquillity again. The chapter is bloody boring,...
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Episode 33 – G.I. Jake
Download the Podcast Here It’s been a long long time Bookend Friends. Not only did we have eight episodes of sonic high school madness, but we had Peter being an absolute useless piece of shit when it came to editing for most of November and December, but here we are, just in time for new years,...
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Episode 32 – Graduation Day at Sonic’s Hole
Download the Podcast Here We did it guys! Your two bookends are finally finished with Sonic High School and can move on with the important things in life. Eight episodes were about 7 more than I wanted to do after the first week, but we’re nothing if not dedicated to this stupidity. For such a…
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Episode 31 - Anacondas in the Ovary Office (feat. Smash Mouth)
Download the Podcast Here It’s the penultimate episode on Sonic High School your bookends will ever do. This week we’ll be reading Chapters 23 and 24, it’s been 7 episodes on this abortion of a fanfic, and my god does it feel like many, many more. Shadow the hedgehog finds out the cause of his...
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Episode 30 - Impromptu Funeral Dressage
Download the Podcast Here Spelunking in the caves beneath the mountains of madness yet again, your Bookend Boys Peter and Louis read chapters 20-22 of the twisted fever dream that is Sonic High school, with the end looming tantalisingly close. After being confronted with the apparent cheating of...
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Episode 29 - A Crocodile Penis Depression
Download the Podcast Here It’s that time again bookend fans, where your boys Peter and Louis take it upon themselves to tackle chapters 17-19 of Sonic High School, even though nobody asked them to and frankly everyone would be happier if they just stopped. This time Sonic is forced to thank a…
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Episode 28 - Skatman Omega
Download the Podcast Here Join us friends; high school calls. However, while our spirits are willing, our minds are gradually being reduced to the consistency of good old Grandma Bookend’s famous kedgeree dish. This week we read chapters 13-16 of the McDonalds endorsed masterpiece Sonic High...
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Episode 27 - Chekov’s Lie Down
Download the Podcast Here This is bad bookend fans. With Peter and Louis less than halfway through Sonic High school their minds have already frayed to dangerous levels. Send help, or possibly ISIS, to put them out of their misery. In the text Rouge gives birth to Knuckle’s baby (to the surprise…
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Episode 26 - Big Boobed Bat With Bra Has Butt Baby
Download the Podcast Here This week your bookends continue their trip into the heart of darkness that is the insanity of Sonic High School. Where Bats and Chameleons have sex in science hats, and anything is possible. Together we learn high tier sex moves from a horny chameleon, Louis has a…
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Episode 25 - ECAF EKAHS
Download the Podcast Here This week your bookends start their fan fiction odyssey into the twisted world of Sonic High School, where, against everyone’s better judgement, we will be spending the next few weeks. Join us in our utter bewilderment as two grown men with very little knowledge of the...
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Episode 24 - Nobody Expects the ITF Tranquillity
Download the Podcast Here Join your Two Absolute Bookends in Chapter 20 of The Way The Stars Fall: Rebirth where the Tranquility go back 50000 years into the past, and nobody really cares, jack decided to try rescuing Tona against all good reason and Jack goes on a ‘Snatch & Grab’ with the…
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Episode 23 - Franz Kafka’s Tona Shrike
Download the Podcast Here Join your Two Absolute Bookends in Chapter 19 of The Way The Stars Fall: Rebirth where the Team escapes from the insurrectionist ambush with minimal effort, despite not standing a chance. Meanwhile Tona undergoes a horrific transformation into a Rokarii for reasons never...
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Episode 22 - Thor Four Est Mort
Download the Podcast Here Join your Two Absolute Bookends in Chapter 18 of The Way The Stars Fall: Rebirth where Tona is recovering from her Rokarii shanking, but doesn’t let that mar her perfect stomach, Jack is keeping her company rather than captaining, Roxy is introduced then killed and...
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Episode 21 - Mind Smirks
Download the Podcast Here Join your Two Absolute Bookends in Chapter 17 of The Way The Stars Fall: Rebirth while Jack leads a team of his trading ship’s crack commandos to rescue the inexplicably not dead Tona from the clutches of a very confused Alien Hive Mind. It’s far less exciting than it...
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Episode 20 - Soft Ilmarian Metal Music
Download the Podcast Here After a long hiatus in uploads (which is all entirely on Peter for being distracted and an overall lazy shit) we’re back and looking at chapter 16 of The Way The Stars Fall: Rebirth. This is our second attempt at recording this episode, and our frayed nerves do start to...
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Episode 19 - The Amazing 'Pfts'
Download the Podcast Here This week your two bookends find themselves again on the Vortmund with Tona looking at the alien egg. It hatches, everybody dies and Tona does everything wrong that she possible could. With that in mind, let me leave you with this direct quote from Tona near the close of...
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Episode 18 - Romancing the Ton(a)
Download the Podcast Here This week we’re reading Chapter 14 of TWTSF:R and we mostly spend it with the now captain (shudder) of the Vortmund, Tona, as she mines, romances and touches dusty alien eggs. Featured this week is lots of complaining about Tona being a captain, the universes weird tech...
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ABOUT THIS SHOW
Join Right bookend Peter and Left Bookend Louis as they critique bad literature chapter by chapter, often getting very distracted and off topic along the way.
HOSTED BY
Two Absolute Bookends
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Frequently Asked Questions
How many episodes does Two Absolute Bookends have?
Two Absolute Bookends currently has 25 episodes available on PodParley. New episodes are automatically indexed when they're published to the podcast feed.
What is Two Absolute Bookends about?
Join Right bookend Peter and Left Bookend Louis as they critique bad literature chapter by chapter, often getting very distracted and off topic along the way.
How often does Two Absolute Bookends release new episodes?
Two Absolute Bookends has 25 episodes. Check the episode list to see recent publication dates and frequency.
Where can I listen to Two Absolute Bookends?
You can listen to Two Absolute Bookends on PodParley by clicking any episode. We provide an embedded audio player for direct listening, and you can also subscribe via your preferred podcast app using the RSS feed.
Who hosts Two Absolute Bookends?
Two Absolute Bookends is created and hosted by Two Absolute Bookends.
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